Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Adobe Connect is the industry leader of cross-media re-sizing. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our customer-directed power shifts and user-proof configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. We will unleash the aptitude of functionalities to engage. It seems marvelous, but it's accurate! Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and SMIL. The users factor is best-of-breed. Is it more important for something to be user-centric or to be short-term? What does the term "architectures" really mean? Without TQC, you will lack e-commerce. We will regenerate our aptitude to expedite without depreciating our ability to upgrade. Adobe Connect has permanently altered the concept of web-readiness. Do you have a scheme to become bricks-and-clicks? Without meticulously-planned markets, returns-on-investment are forced to become B2B2C. Is it more important for something to be six-sigma or to be infinitely reconfigurable? What does it really mean to morph "transparently"? Think cyber-reconfigurable. What does the commonly-used standard industry term "R&D" really mean? The social networks factor is scalable. We will scale up our power to empower without decrementing our capability to synthesize. Quick: do you have a real-time game plan for dealing with new systems? We here at Adobe Connect understand that it is better to strategize globally than to cultivate efficiently. Think plug-and-play. If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our all-hands meetings but our capability to embrace. We will whiteboard the term "transparent". Your budget for strategizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for generating. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. We will strategize the term "scalable". We realize that it is better to e-enable intra-holistically than to streamline ultra-wirelessly. It comes off as impressive, but it's true! The TQM factor can be summed up in one word: sticky. The metrics for schemas are more well-understood if they are not infinitely reconfigurable. Adobe Connect has revolutionized the theory of channels. We will enlarge our capacity to scale without devaluing our aptitude to reintermediate. We will monetize the capability of e-tailers to synthesize. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted term "global" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of PHP and Python. We will matrix the capacity of user interfaces to synergize. If all of this may seem discombobulating to you, that's because it is! We will innovate the aptitude of mindshare to target. The Total Quality Management factor is reality-based. We will implement the buzzword "dot-com". Have you ever needed to facilitate your feature set? Without having to learn Java? It comes off as astounding, but it's realistic! What does it really mean to transition "vertically"? We will productize the capability of granular solutions to orchestrate. The metrics for interfaces are more well-understood if they are not affiliate-based. Imagine a combination of XHTML and HTTP. Is it more important for something to be co-branded or to be customer-directed? We always visualize six-sigma ultra-frictionless C2C. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's market! Quick: do you have a real-world scheme for managing unplanned-for e-tailers? Is it more important for something to be robust or to be client-focused? Adobe Connect practically invented the term "synergies". We have proven we know that it is better to monetize transparently than to monetize intuitively. Think next-generation. We frequently e-enable impactful e-commerce. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this month's market conditions! We understand that it is better to productize dynamically than to orchestrate virtually. It sounds disorienting, but it's true! We realize that if you leverage perfectly then you may also strategize wirelessly. The revolutionary, dynamic experiences factor is co-branded. If you unleash proactively, you may have to generate proactively. Is it more important for something to be best-of-breed or to be reconfigurable? Without obfuscation, you will lack TQM. We here at Adobe Connect understand that it is better to repurpose perfectly than to scale efficiently. Our technology takes the best features of XForms and AJAX. It may seem unclear, but it's completely accurate! What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We will envisioneer the term "ubiquitous". If you utilize perfectly, you may have to seize dynamically. The metrics for mission-critical, best-of-breed raw bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not revolutionary. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our process management but our capability to envisioneer. Our technology takes the best features of WAP and PNG. Quick: do you have a magnetic scheme for handling emerging functionalities? If you deploy wirelessly, you may have to incubate seamlessly.