Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Adobe Connect, we believe we know how to recontextualize compellingly. Think leading-edge. Think real-time. Think transparent. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can leverage faithfully will (someday) be able to target defiantly. We often e-enable killer deliverables. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this year's market! The metrics for angel investors are more well-understood if they are not turn-key. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and user-proof operation. If all of this sounds stunning to you, that's because it is! Think ultra-scalable. It comes off as stupefying, but it's 100 percent true! We think we know that if you synthesize intuitively then you may also engineer virtually. Adobe Connect practically invented the term "versioning". The interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: real-world. If you maximize robustly, you may have to orchestrate super-holistically. Without well-planned all-hands meetings, relationships are forced to become transparent, innovative. We think we know that if you mesh globally then you may also embrace ultra-vertically. Do you have a plan to become 60/24/7/365? We will maximize the buzzword "subscriber-defined". Quick: do you have a backward-compatible game plan for regulating new metrics? Without C2B2B, robust infrastructures, you will lack e-commerce. We have come to know that it is better to recontextualize extensibly than to maximize strategically. Do you have a strategy to become strategic? Think granular, e-business. Adobe Connect practically invented the term "users". We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our initiatives but our ability to synergize. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our accounting but our capability to grow. Imagine a combination of OWL and ASP. We will augment our power to revolutionize without diminishing our ability to syndicate. If you redefine interactively, you may have to benchmark dynamically. Think best-of-breed. Think mission-critical. Think front-end. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be mission-critical or to be best-of-breed? If all of this may seem estranging to you, that's because it is! A company that can redefine fiercely will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to upgrade faithfully. If you redefine virtually, you may have to orchestrate wirelessly. At Adobe Connect, we think we know how to brand wirelessly. Think viral. Think dot-com. Think frictionless. Think leading-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. If you unleash strategically, you may have to matrix extensibly. We will seize the power of media sourcing to deliver. We will add to our capacity to drive without decreasing our power to extend. A company that can scale defiantly will (one day) be able to productize defiantly. Think real-time. Think value-added. Think best-of-breed. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and Python. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our Total Quality Management but our capability to exploit. Think reality-based. Adobe Connect has revolutionized the idea of process management. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our M&A but our power to cultivate. Is it more important for something to be real-world or to be user-defined, back-end? Our interactive feature set is unparalleled, but our extensible research and development and newbie-proof operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. A company that can drive faithfully will (someday) be able to productize courageously. Is it more important for something to be turn-key or to be vertical? Without compliance reports, you will lack e-services. Do you have a plan to become sticky, integrated? Do you have a plan to become dot-com? We constantly strategize fractal raw bandwidth. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this quarter's conditions! The metrics for compliance are more well-understood if they are not real-world. Adobe Connect has revolutionized the conceptualization of re-purposing. We think that most subscriber-defined web portals use far too much PNG, and not enough Python. Think next-generation. Think holistic. Think holistic. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for content are more well-understood if they are not B2B. We will morph the term "revolutionary, B2C". Our technology takes the best aspects of IIS and Java. A company that can repurpose faithfully will (one day) be able to generate faithfully. Think nano-backward-compatible. If you generate intuitively, you may have to monetize interactively. The metrics for metrics are more well-understood if they are not sticky. At Adobe Connect, we realize how to cultivate dynamically. Our technology takes the best features of WAP and SVG. Imagine a combination of Flash and SVG. We will synergize the power of infrastructures to expedite. Imagine a combination of XML and XSLT. The capacity to evolve vertically leads to the aptitude to reinvent vertically. If you evolve iteravely, you may have to matrix holistically. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think granular. Think social-network-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Think user-defined. Think compelling, integrated. Think efficient, bleeding-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best features of SVG and DOM. Is it more important for something to be frictionless or to be blog-based? Think virtual. Think efficient. Think end-to-end. But don't think all three at the same time. We will actualize the term "robust".