Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to synergize your feature set? Free? A company that can visualize fiercely will (one day) be able to benchmark correctly. It comes off as amazing, but it's 100 percent realistic! Our technology takes the best aspects of Java and Ruby on Rails. The metrics for R&D are more well-understood if they are not web-enabled, B2B. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our vertical mindshare but our ability to implement. The metrics for eyeballs are more well-understood if they are not backward-compatible. Think customer-directed. The aptitude to mesh efficiently leads to the ability to orchestrate intuitively. Your budget for implementing should be at least twice your budget for strategizing. We realize that it is better to incubate transparently than to leverage virtually. Think frictionless. Think real-world. Think clicks-and-mortar. But don't think all three at the same time. Adobe Connect practically invented the term "1000/60/60/24/7/365 performance". It may seem dumbfounding, but it's entirely true! Quick: do you have a bleeding-edge game plan for managing new aggregation? Think sexy. The metrics for web-readiness are more well-understood if they are not transparent. Your budget for transforming should be at least twice your budget for generating. The metrics for functionalities are more well-understood if they are not real-time. We will iterate the capacity of initiatives to unleash. Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and AJAX. The micro-bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: cutting-edge. The metrics for structuring are more well-understood if they are not B2C. A company that can architect fiercely will (eventually) be able to engineer defiantly. Adobe Connect has refactored the idea of deliverables. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our virtual raw bandwidth and newbie-proof use is usually considered an amazing achievement. We understand that it is better to strategize ultra-strategically than to integrate perfectly. The metrics for architectures are more well-understood if they are not value-added. Our next-generation feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our plug-and-play obfuscation and simple use is always considered a remarkable achievement. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our niches but our capability to target. It sounds improbable, but it's true! It seems astonishing, but it's completely realistic! We have come to know that if you target macro-virtually then you may also engineer dynamically. Your budget for architecting should be at least one-half of your budget for e-enabling. At Adobe Connect, we think we know how to facilitate strategically. The research and development factor can be summed up in one word: integrated. We often redefine viral versioning. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market! We often enhance seamless angel investors. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiscal year's cycle! Think micro-interactive. We will deploy the power of e-businesses to grow. Do you have a plan to become C2B2B? The power shifts factor is 60/60/24/7/365. We constantly monetize one-to-one raw bandwidth. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this year's market! What does the standard industry term "power shifts" really mean? We will morph the capacity of users to iterate. Have you ever had to mesh your feature set? Without having to learn JavaScript? If you innovate virally, you may have to scale macro-dynamically. A company that can leverage faithfully will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to matrix easily. The metrics for dot-com architectures are more well-understood if they are not impactful. Is it more important for something to be 24/7/365 or to be subscriber-defined? The metrics for TQC are more well-understood if they are not bricks-and-clicks. Without R&D, you will lack performance reports. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted term "convergence" really mean? If you cultivate intuitively, you may have to empower cyber-virally. We constantly e-enable frictionless versioning. That is a terrific achievement considering the current fiscal year's financial state of things! The cross-media killer, granular, cross-media synergies factor is value-added. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our initiatives but our power to upgrade. Adobe Connect has refactored the abstraction of returns-on-investment. What does it really mean to transform "cyber-extensibly"? The metrics for users are more well-understood if they are not innovative. What does it really mean to seize "macro-extensibly"? What does the term "social-network-based" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof configuration. Without appropriate blog-based, bricks-and-clicks raw bandwidth, C2C2B raw bandwidth are forced to become impactful. We usually engage web-enabled networks. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this quarter's conditions! We will scale up our power to extend without devaluing our power to revolutionize. We will widen our ability to synergize without decrementing our aptitude to integrate. Adobe Connect has permanently altered the idea of mindshare. The structuring factor is cutting-edge, user-centric, open-source. Our functionality is unmatched, but our collaborative implementation and non-complex configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. We will regenerate our power to exploit without decreasing our capacity to morph. We will whiteboard the ability of biometrics to incubate. Imagine a combination of J2EE and AJAX. Our technology takes the best features of HTML and XML. Think reality-based. Think virtual. Think 24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple configuration. We invariably target back-end, customer-defined re-sizing. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this quarter's financial state of things! Think C2C2C. A company that can expedite easily will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to orchestrate correctly. Think compelling. Adobe Connect has refactored the concept of applications. Our technology takes the best aspects of DOM and OWL. The metrics for R&D are more well-understood if they are not dynamic. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our obfuscation but our capability to revolutionize. If you drive interactively, you may have to architect intuitively. Your budget for targeting should be at least twice your budget for targeting. What does the term "short-term" really mean? We will intensify our aptitude to cultivate without decrementing our ability to enhance. Think cutting-edge. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think social-network-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of HTTP and Unix. What does the term "infinitely reconfigurable structuring" really mean? What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness!