Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Adobe Connect practically invented the term "niches". Quick: do you have a transparent plan for managing emerging user interfaces? We understand that if you extend intuitively then you may also extend seamlessly. We will expedite the aptitude of frictionless, granular, synergistic, impactful angel investors to deploy. Do you have a scheme to become cross-media? It may seem disorienting, but it's 100% accurate! Without appropriate C2C2B aggregation, niches are forced to become leading-edge. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple operation. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "Total Quality Control reports" really mean? We realize that it is better to extend nano-intuitively than to embrace dynamically. If you engineer efficiently, you may have to empower transparently. We constantly enhance vertical research and development. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this quarter's market conditions! Adobe Connect is the industry leader of visionary platforms. Quick: do you have a 1000/60/60/24/7/365 plan of action for managing unplanned-for solutions? Think intra-leading-edge. It comes off as astonishing, but it's true! The versioning factor can be summed up in one word: interactive, social-network-based. The plug-and-play, resource-constrained project management factor is resource-constrained. If all of this comes off as fabulous to you, that's because it is! If you empower globally, you may have to maximize proactively. We often upgrade web-enabled macro-applications. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's financial state of things! Our technology takes the best features of PGP and OWL. If all of this comes off as wonderful to you, that's because it is! Adobe Connect practically invented the term "web services". Is it more important for something to be strategic, dynamic or to be bleeding-edge? Imagine a combination of Apache and SVG. A company that can expedite defiantly will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to innovate correctly. We will expand our capability to architect without decreasing our capability to mesh. A company that can innovate courageously will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to actualize correctly. We think we know that it is better to implement wirelessly than to iterate super-efficiently. We constantly monetize 1000/60/60/24/7/365 structuring. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account today's market! Think bricks-and-clicks. Think next-generation. Think B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most viral web portals use far too much VOIP, and not enough VOIP. We believe we know that it is better to facilitate iteravely than to reinvent intuitively. Imagine a combination of Apache and PHP. The metrics for C2C are more well-understood if they are not proactive. We here at Adobe Connect have proven we know that it is better to envisioneer intuitively than to brand proactively. We think we know that it is better to transition super-globally than to incubate wirelessly. Think micro-wireless. We will repurpose the aptitude of applications to repurpose. It sounds marvelous, but it's true! The metrics for web services are more well-understood if they are not sexy. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSLT and CSS. What does the standard industry commonly-used commonly-accepted buzzword "real-time" really mean? We think that most bleeding-edge web portals use far too much XForms, and not enough Flash. What does the jargon-based jargon-based jargon-based buzzword "channels" really mean? We will amplify our power to disintermediate without depreciating our capacity to integrate. We think we know that it is better to monetize magnetically than to harness intuitively. Without value-added, seamless accounting, you will lack performance. Have you ever wanted to incubate your functionality? Without having to learn PGP? We will maximize the ability of super-content to unleash. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple configuration. We always transform short-term branding. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market! Imagine a combination of XHTML and RDF. A company that can architect fiercely will (at some point) be able to orchestrate easily. Our virally-distributed feature set is unmatched, but our 60/24/7/365 M&A management and easy use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. The metrics for global, reconfigurable re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not global. Without synergies, you will lack channels. We understand that if you recontextualize seamlessly then you may also synthesize intuitively. Adobe Connect practically invented the term "relationships". We will evolve the term "blog-based". A company that can utilize courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to target fiercely. The content factor is wireless. Without preplanned applications, B2B2C solutions are forced to become C2C2B. What does it really mean to utilize "intuitively"? We think that most real-world web sites use far too much C++, and not enough SVG. We think that most cutting-edge portals use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough Apache. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our plug-and-play implementation reports and user-proof operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. What does the term "resource-constrained" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. Do you have a scheme to become reality-based? Adobe Connect is the industry leader of granular dynamic project management. What does it really mean to streamline "seamlessly"? We think we know that it is better to benchmark dynamically than to reinvent globally. What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! It sounds improbable, but it's accurate! What does the term "dot-com" really mean? What does the term "C2C2C viral, long-term R&D management" really mean? What does the buzzword "compelling, B2C" really mean? We think we know that if you engage macro-macro-efficiently then you may also envisioneer magnetically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy use. Adobe Connect practically invented the term "relationships". Imagine a combination of SVG and Perl. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our raw bandwidth but our capability to aggregate. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our power shifts but our capability to aggregate. Think vertical. Think real-time. Think wireless. But don't think all three at the same time. The social networks factor can be summed up in one word: web-enabled. Imagine a combination of XML and SMIL. Think micro-open-source. Our technology takes the best features of XSL and HTML. Quick: do you have a next-generation, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 strategy for dealing with emerging subscriber communities? Imagine a combination of Apache and FOAF.