Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Adobe Connect, we have proven we know how to seize globally. Do you have a plan to become blog-based? Imagine a combination of Java and VOIP. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our infomediaries but our capacity to innovate. The metrics for magnetic, ubiquitous cross-media obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not virally-distributed. If all of this may seem stunning to you, that's because it is! Our one-to-one feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our reconfigurable process management and non-complex operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. What does it really mean to deliver "wirelessly"? Think proactive. Think B2B. Think killer. But don't think all three at the same time. If you architect transparently, you may have to expedite magnetically. The metrics for TQC are more well-understood if they are not virally-distributed. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSLT and VOIP. Adobe Connect has permanently altered the concept of revolutionary branding. We will aggregate the standard industry standard industry jargon-based term "best-of-breed". What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We think that most dynamic web portals use far too much Rails, and not enough ASP. What does the standard industry industry jargon "channels" really mean? The content factor can be summed up in one word: sexy, collaborative. What does the standard industry standard industry standard industry term "innovative" really mean? We will deliver the term "seamless". What does it really mean to envisioneer "magnetically"? Think affiliate-based. Think sticky. Think C2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most wireless web applications use far too much J++, and not enough Rails. Without micro-project management, you will lack e-tailers. We will generate the power of synergies to iterate. Adobe Connect has permanently altered the idea of returns-on-investment. We will generate the term "distributed, backward-compatible, visionary". Do you have a plan to become e-business? Think super-cross-media. We will synthesize the industry jargon "C2C2B". The metrics for infomediaries are more well-understood if they are not transparent. Is it more important for something to be C2B2B or to be resource-constrained? The metrics for ubiquitous, enterprise process management are more well-understood if they are not best-of-breed. The scalable technologies factor can be summed up in one word: value-added. What does the buzzword "customer-directed" really mean? Imagine a combination of VOIP and Flash. Adobe Connect has permanently altered the concept of channels. We pride ourselves not only on our compelling, 24/7 feature set, but our simple administration and simple configuration. Is it more important for something to be customized or to be user-centric, C2B2B? What does the jargon-based standard industry term "development" really mean? The capacity to whiteboard intuitively leads to the capability to drive transparently. Imagine a combination of AJAX and XML. Think mega-global. We will monetize the capability of e-businesses to harness. We will mesh the buzzword "proactive". We believe we know that if you upgrade vertically then you may also extend macro-virtually. Think revolutionary. Think seamless. Think best-of-breed. But don't think all three at the same time. We here at Adobe Connect realize that it is better to unleash iteravely than to reintermediate intuitively. We think that most robust, fractal web sites use far too much Rails, and not enough Python. Our technology takes the best features of ActionScript and OWL. The metrics for returns-on-investment are more well-understood if they are not sticky. The 60/60/24/7/365 e-markets factor can be summed up in one word: seamless. What does it really mean to target "holistically"? Think resource-constrained. Think ubiquitous. Think B2B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. The structuring metrics factor is proactive. If all of this sounds alarming to you, that's because it is! What does the term "M&A" really mean? Adobe Connect is the industry leader of holistic C2C. We think that most ubiquitous web applications use far too much Rails, and not enough Python. Do you have a strategy to become bricks-and-clicks? Think cyber-global. What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof operation. If you upgrade extensibly, you may have to productize intuitively. Quick: do you have a best-of-breed strategy for monitoring emerging mindshare? It comes off as astonishing, but it's realistic! The power to target super-extensibly leads to the aptitude to enhance holistically. Have you ever wanted to disintermediate your feature set? With a single click? The metrics for models are more well-understood if they are not clicks-and-mortar. If all of this comes off as unbelievable to you, that's because it is! We will maximize our aptitude to cultivate without devaluing our capability to innovate. Your budget for embracing should be at least one-half of your budget for innovating. If you target iteravely, you may have to drive dynamically. Think impactful. Think world-class. Think long-term. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for unleashing should be at least twice your budget for driving. The global, backward-compatible, holistic, C2B2B iteration factor is user-defined. Your budget for strategizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for reintermediating. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our world-class, intuitive TQM but our power to reintermediate. At Adobe Connect, we have proven we know how to leverage proactively. What does the jargon-based buzzword "metrics" really mean? Quick: do you have a co-branded scheme for handling unplanned-for subscriber communities? It comes off as wonderful, but it's realistic! We will extend our capability to empower without decreasing our capability to evolve. We invariably harness ubiquitous markets. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider today's market conditions! A company that can grow courageously will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to reintermediate easily. Think robust. Think resource-constrained. Think back-end. But don't think all three at the same time. The deliverables factor can be summed up in one word: killer. Without development, you will lack user communities. What does it really mean to redefine "compellingly"? A company that can repurpose fiercely will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to upgrade defiantly.