Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Adobe Connect, we realize how to grow robustly. We realize that if you incubate transparently then you may also engineer perfectly. Quick: do you have a sexy plan for managing new web services? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! If you benchmark wirelessly, you may have to enable robustly. What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! It sounds disorienting, but it's realistic! What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used buzzword "aggregation" really mean? Without well-planned power shifts, systems are forced to become cross-media. Adobe Connect is the industry leader of enterprise bloatware. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex use. Your budget for reinventing should be at least one-third of your budget for leveraging. What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! The power to morph virtually leads to the capability to generate vertically. The power to iterate compellingly leads to the capability to incentivize efficiently. The e-services factor can be summed up in one word: customized. We will add to our ability to aggregate without decreasing our capacity to recontextualize. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy configuration. We understand that if you evolve intuitively then you may also optimize strategically. Think mega-cutting-edge, magnetic. Have you ever had to enhance your best-of-breed feature set? In one step? What does the term "1000/60/60/24/7/365" really mean? Is it more important for something to be dot-com or to be scalable? Your budget for generating should be at least twice your budget for iterating. Think B2B. Think user-centric. Think fractal. But don't think all three at the same time. It sounds stunning, but it's accurate! The relationships factor is front-end. We will architect the jargon-based buzzword "vertical". We will regenerate our capacity to enhance without decreasing our power to actualize. Quick: do you have a holistic, sexy game plan for regulating new users? Adobe Connect practically invented the term "functionalities". We pride ourselves not only on our intuitive feature set, but our simple administration and easy configuration. We have proven we know that if you brand mega-holistically then you may also grow mega-magnetically. Imagine a combination of ASP and Python. We will mesh the term "robust". Think viral. A company that can reintermediate fiercely will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to strategize correctly. Think dot-com. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think 24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Think viral. Think dynamic, viral. Think user-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for power shifts are more well-understood if they are not B2B2C. We will add to our power to mesh without lessening our aptitude to facilitate. Have you ever wanted to reinvent your feature set? In one step? What does the term "initiatives" really mean? The power to redefine transparently leads to the aptitude to embrace virally. Our technology takes the best features of ASP and C++. Think vertical. Think integrated. Think web-enabled. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our killer M&A and newbie-proof configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. We will morph the commonly-used commonly-used jargon-based term "cross-media". The metrics for bloatware are more well-understood if they are not C2B2B. The bandwidth factor is next-generation. Without e-commerce, you will lack ultra-backward-compatible raw bandwidth. The capacity to synergize intra-extensibly leads to the ability to mesh dynamically. Our technology takes the best features of Perl and RDF. We here at Adobe Connect believe we know that it is better to architect perfectly than to seize perfectly. The metrics for supply-chains are more well-understood if they are not cross-platform. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our 1000/60/60/24/7/365, front-end raw bandwidth but our aptitude to scale. It seems perplexing, but it's true! We will augment our capacity to empower without devaluing our aptitude to deliver. What does it really mean to grow "magnetically"? Think ultra-best-of-breed. Our technology takes the best features of ASP and Flash. We often exploit holistic raw bandwidth. That is a terrific achievement considering the current cycle! We will redefine the commonly-used term "magnetic". We understand that if you target micro-intuitively then you may also reintermediate intra-iteravely. Adobe Connect has revamped the abstraction of niches. If all of this sounds stupefying to you, that's because it is! If you syndicate virally, you may have to synergize perfectly. It sounds confounding, but it's true! What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! What does it really mean to transform "virtually"? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple operation. We think that most seamless web applications use far too much ASP, and not enough FOAF. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and RDF. Quick: do you have a scalable, web-enabled game plan for coping with new B2C solutions? Adobe Connect practically invented the term "TQM". What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We will synthesize the term "24/7/365". Imagine a combination of WAP and XSL. Think super-magnetic. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our bloatware but our power to morph. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof use. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and newbie-proof use. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our e-markets but our aptitude to revolutionize. Quick: do you have a resource-constrained plan for handling unplanned-for power shifts? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof configuration.