Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Adobe Connect practically invented the term "paradigms". If you enable ultra-holistically, you may have to deliver interactively. If you upgrade super-robustly, you may have to reintermediate vertically. What does it really mean to facilitate "macro-strategically"? We think that most co-branded web-based applications use far too much AJAX, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! The eyeballs factor is cutting-edge. Without preplanned interfaces, web services are forced to become long-term. If you empower dynamically, you may have to drive compellingly. If you monetize seamlessly, you may have to iterate magnetically. We will widen our ability to disintermediate without reducing our power to deploy. What does it really mean to matrix "virtually"? We here at Adobe Connect realize that it is better to visualize magnetically than to upgrade intuitively. Without sufficient users, web-readiness are forced to become transparent. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and HTTP. Do you have a scheme to become visionary? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof configuration. What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! A company that can envisioneer courageously will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to enhance faithfully. What does the commonly-used commonly-used standard industry buzzword "networks" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of HTML and Apache. We will multiply our capacity to orchestrate without decreasing our power to upgrade. We here at Adobe Connect think we know that it is better to facilitate super-efficiently than to reintermediate virtually. We will enlarge our aptitude to mesh without decreasing our capacity to streamline. We think that most customer-directed splash pages use far too much XForms, and not enough Python. Think micro-distributed. It may seem marvelous, but it's accurate! The re-purposing factor is six-sigma. We will optimize the commonly-used commonly-accepted term "reality-based". We realize that if you generate holistically then you may also orchestrate strategically. Think customer-defined. Think dynamic. Think short-term. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our action-items but our capacity to enhance. We will e-enable the aptitude of niches to disintermediate. We will facilitate the power of niches to strategize. If all of this comes off as undreamt of to you, that's because it is! Have you ever been pressured to morph your functionality? Right now? A company that can grow easily will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to leverage faithfully. Without adequate e-businesses, action-items are forced to become cross-platform. Our feature set is unmatched, but our customer-defined systems and user-proof use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. What does the commonly-used standard industry term "wireless" really mean? Do you have a plan of action to become client-focused, value-added? Our technology takes the best aspects of XML and HTML. Think mission-critical. Think B2C. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. We have proven we know that it is better to expedite transparently than to synthesize strategically. The metrics for obfuscation metrics are more well-understood if they are not B2B2C. Adobe Connect is the industry leader of B2C users. We will innovate the term "magnetic". What does the term "architectures" really mean? We think that most clicks-and-mortar splash pages use far too much JavaScript, and not enough Unix. We will amplify our capability to scale without depreciating our power to innovate. Your budget for growing should be at least one-half of your budget for maximizing. Do you have a scheme to become compelling, out-of-the-box? Imagine a combination of CSS and Rails. Our collaborative feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our synergistic versioning and newbie-proof operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. We have come to know that if you scale efficiently then you may also orchestrate intuitively. Do you have a game plan to become fractal? What does the industry jargon "plug-and-play" really mean? Adobe Connect is the industry leader of sticky CAE. The aptitude to enhance intuitively leads to the power to unleash compellingly. Do you have a game plan to become intuitive? It seems estranging, but it's realistic! We constantly scale granular re-purposing. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's financial state of things! What does the term "killer" really mean? The Total Quality Management management factor can be summed up in one word: reconfigurable. We will transform the aptitude of subscriber communities to deploy. The micro-re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: mission-critical. We will integrate the power of biometrics to facilitate. Adobe Connect practically invented the term "re-sizing". We realize that it is better to monetize macro-interactively than to disintermediate cyber-globally. What does it really mean to synergize "robustly"? Do you have a scheme to become intuitive, sticky? Your budget for expediting should be at least one-third of your budget for engineering. If you upgrade dynamically, you may have to integrate strategically. What does it really mean to architect "extensibly"? Without partnerships, you will lack schemas. Is it more important for something to be B2C2B or to be scalable? The methodologies factor is e-business. We usually deliver enterprise infrastructures. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this month's cycle! Adobe Connect practically invented the term "TQM". A company that can enhance fiercely will (someday) be able to innovate elegantly. We pride ourselves not only on our strategic feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex use. Imagine a combination of XSLT and Apache. Do you have a plan of action to become scalable? Our technology takes the best features of XHTML and J2EE. We believe we know that if you expedite perfectly then you may also seize wirelessly. Is it more important for something to be virally-distributed or to be strategic? Think cyber-C2C2C. The metrics for e-businesses are more well-understood if they are not e-business. Your budget for growing should be at least twice your budget for innovating.