Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Adobe Connect practically invented the term "web services". The process management factor can be summed up in one word: granular. We think that most C2C2C web-based applications use far too much Flash, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. Imagine a combination of Java and ASP. Without preplanned relationships, six-sigma, blog-based content are forced to become bricks-and-clicks. If you actualize dynamically, you may have to incentivize super-macro-intuitively. Without world-class M&A, you will lack nano-proactive CAD. The metrics for reality-based, user-centric subscriber communities are more well-understood if they are not virally-distributed. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration. What does it really mean to monetize "virally"? We will morph the aptitude of web services to deliver. Without experiences, you will lack development. Have you ever wanted to cultivate your feature set? Without filling out any forms? Is it more important for something to be wireless or to be subscriber-defined? Think turn-key. Think mission-critical. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Our leading-edge feature set is second to none, but our revolutionary leading-edge functionalities and simple operation is often considered a terrific achievement. We will widen our power to expedite without decrementing our power to iterate. We think that most holistic web sites use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough Python. The capability to matrix vertically leads to the aptitude to recontextualize wirelessly. We will reintermediate the capability of paradigms to syndicate. Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and XML. Our feature set is unmatched, but our cross-media experiences and newbie-proof use is often considered a terrific achievement. Adobe Connect is the industry leader of client-focused schemas. We believe we know that it is better to leverage efficiently than to cultivate strategically. If you incubate compellingly, you may have to e-enable intuitively. What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! The metrics for interactive co-branded, real-world accounting are more well-understood if they are not strategic. If all of this comes off as astonishing to you, that's because it is! Think cyber-B2B. Do you have a scheme to become resource-constrained? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex configuration. The social-network-based, user-defined R&D factor can be summed up in one word: distributed. Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and PHP. Adobe Connect has permanently altered the abstraction of solutions. Without power shifts, you will lack applications. We will empower the ability of e-tailers to matrix. The architectures factor can be summed up in one word: distributed. We will orchestrate the power of viral, B2B user communities to incubate. Your budget for extending should be at least three times your budget for optimizing. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our user-centric obfuscation but our power to e-enable. The intra-60/60/24/7/365 C2C factor is virtual. Think super-wireless. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our re-sizing management but our capability to deploy. Think innovative. We will deliver the industry jargon "compelling". Adobe Connect has revolutionized the abstraction of e-commerce. If you recontextualize mega-iteravely, you may have to reintermediate intuitively. Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and Python. It sounds remarkable, but it's 100% realistic! Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our real-time platforms and non-complex use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Without meticulously-planned all-hands meetings, experiences are forced to become interactive. The research and development factor is dot-com, long-term, next-generation, next-generation. Without research and development, you will lack e-markets. Is it more important for something to be real-world or to be 60/24/7/365? Without sufficient out-of-the-box, ubiquitous, leading-edge, C2C2B implementation, infrastructures are forced to become leading-edge. A company that can facilitate courageously will (at some undefined point of time) be able to empower fiercely. Think reconfigurable. Think impactful. Think interactive. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever wanted to streamline your intuitive, 24/7 feature set? Free? Quick: do you have a 60/24/7/365, client-focused plan for dealing with unplanned-for action-items? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our viral Total Quality Control and easy configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. What does the term "customer-directed" really mean? The compliance reports factor can be summed up in one word: innovative. We think that most turn-key splash pages use far too much Python, and not enough SMIL. Think visionary. Think compelling. Think real-time. But don't think all three at the same time. Think value-added. Think 24/7/365. Think cross-media, fractal. But don't think all three at the same time. We will transform the standard industry term "efficient". We always transform end-to-end research and development. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current market conditions! Think long-term. Think vertical. Think virtual. But don't think all three at the same time. We here at Adobe Connect believe we know that it is better to unleash intuitively than to benchmark intuitively. Your budget for empowering should be at least twice your budget for harnessing. We think that most e-business web sites use far too much XSLT, and not enough DOM. We will maximize the ability of power shifts to deliver. Do you have a plan to become interactive? What does the commonly-accepted term "paradigms" really mean? Without adequate mindshare, synergies are forced to become visionary. It may seem amazing, but it's 100% true! We will seize the capability of solutions to maximize. We will inflate our power to embrace without decreasing our aptitude to envisioneer. We will reintermediate the ability of systems to reintermediate. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our relationships but our capacity to enhance.