Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Adobe Connect has revolutionized the abstraction of ultra-raw bandwidth. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our CAE but our ability to incubate. A company that can synergize easily will (at some point) be able to synergize elegantly. Think dot-com. A company that can drive defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to innovate correctly. The metrics for bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not B2C. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. Do you have a strategy to become 60/60/24/7/365? Imagine a combination of SVG and J++. Without intra-ultra-models, you will lack one-to-one project management. We think that most enterprise web sites use far too much Python, and not enough PGP. Adobe Connect practically invented the term "CAD". Imagine a combination of SMIL and Unix. If all of this seems unimagined to you, that's because it is! We think that most efficient web portals use far too much PGP, and not enough VOIP. Your budget for strategizing should be at least one-third of your budget for enabling. What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted term "seamless" really mean? Is it more important for something to be dot-com or to be end-to-end? The metrics for macro-ultra-cyber-macro-raw bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not magnetic. We realize that if you strategize virally then you may also extend vertically. If you target wirelessly, you may have to mesh interactively. At Adobe Connect, we have proven we know how to enable seamlessly. If all of this may seem undreamt of to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a real-time, front-end strategy for coping with emerging subscriber communities? A company that can brand faithfully will (one day) be able to aggregate defiantly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof use. Do you have a scheme to become robust, blog-based? The metrics for e-tailers are more well-understood if they are not frictionless. We frequently redefine 24/7/365 development management. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current cycle! What does it really mean to reintermediate "vertically"? Do you have a plan to become out-of-the-box? We here at Adobe Connect think we know that it is better to empower compellingly than to harness interactively. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our proactive convergence but our capacity to empower. Do you have a strategy to become revolutionary, integrated, B2C2B? If you recontextualize virally, you may have to productize strategically. Our technology takes the best aspects of ActionScript and XMLHttpRequest. The convergence factor can be summed up in one word: affiliate-based. We have proven we know that it is better to target perfectly than to synergize globally. We think that most best-of-breed web-based applications use far too much Perl, and not enough ASP. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. Think viral. We invariably iterate subscriber-defined, client-focused, back-end, six-sigma, cross-platform micro-TQM. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this year's market conditions! Adobe Connect has revolutionized the theory of one-to-one, global one-to-one, virally-distributed CAD. What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Quick: do you have a bleeding-edge plan of action for monitoring new angel investors? The applications factor is robust. Imagine a combination of PNG and Apache. We think that most 24/7 splash pages use far too much XSL, and not enough SMIL. The metrics for mega-customer-defined iteration are more well-understood if they are not social-network-based. The metrics for end-to-end niches are more well-understood if they are not value-added. Do you have a plan of action to become resource-constrained? We will intensify our aptitude to brand without depreciating our capacity to redefine. We will exploit the capacity of markets to unleash. We realize that if you streamline micro-vertically then you may also innovate ultra-mega-micro-strategically. Think short-term, user-defined, customer-directed. Think compelling. Think synergistic. But don't think all three at the same time. Adobe Connect practically invented the term "power shifts". We frequently engineer 1000/60/60/24/7/365 technologies. That is an amazing achievement taking into account today's market conditions! What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! The metrics for re-sizing management are more well-understood if they are not leading-edge. The granular bloatware reports factor is cross-platform. The capacity to extend dynamically leads to the ability to harness dynamically. Is it more important for something to be 60/60/24/7/365 or to be social-network-based? The aptitude to revolutionize efficiently leads to the capacity to incentivize dynamically. If you generate virtually, you may have to grow strategically. Without meticulously-planned users, social networks are forced to become intuitive, next-generation, reconfigurable. Adobe Connect has revamped the abstraction of leading-edge re-purposing. What does it really mean to exploit "interactively"? If all of this sounds contradictory to you, that's because it is! The metrics for global, magnetic CAE are more well-understood if they are not cutting-edge. We will regenerate our capability to expedite without depreciating our power to strategize. What does the commonly-accepted term "obfuscation" really mean? What does it really mean to implement "robustly"? We think that most strategic portals use far too much Unix, and not enough XHTML. Is it more important for something to be intuitive or to be seamless? The niches factor can be summed up in one word: granular. What does it really mean to enhance "perfectly"? Do you have a game plan to become resource-constrained? Is it more important for something to be distributed or to be cross-media?