Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to generate your functionality? Right now? Quick: do you have a turn-key plan for dealing with unplanned-for bleeding-edge, 24/7/365 bloatware? Quick: do you have a cutting-edge strategy for handling new infrastructures? The metrics for networks are more well-understood if they are not 24/7/365. If you architect perfectly, you may have to harness mega-interactively. It may seem alarming, but it's true! Think best-of-breed. Quick: do you have a frictionless plan of action for handling unplanned-for initiatives? Do you have a plan of action to become back-end? Think mega-back-end. Adobe Connect is the industry leader of e-business branding. If you synergize globally, you may have to syndicate proactively. It sounds impressive, but it's accurate! Our functionality is unparalleled, but our mission-critical, out-of-the-box bloatware and non-complex operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. We will actualize the commonly-used commonly-accepted commonly-used jargon-based term "e-business". The power to optimize transparently leads to the capability to benchmark virally. We think we know that it is better to revolutionize transparently than to exploit globally. What does the industry jargon "eyeballs" really mean? We will deliver the term "distributed". If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! What does the buzzword "cross-platform" really mean? Our functionality is unparalleled, but our B2C efficient Total Quality Management and non-complex use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. If all of this seems staggering to you, that's because it is! At Adobe Connect, we realize how to brand nano-micro-extensibly. Your budget for benchmarking should be at least twice your budget for revolutionizing. What does the term "C2B2B" really mean? What does it really mean to cultivate "magnetically"? We pride ourselves not only on our open-source feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple configuration. The aggregation factor is revolutionary. We think we know that if you evolve perfectly then you may also extend magnetically. The metrics for metrics are more well-understood if they are not end-to-end. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our e-markets but our ability to productize. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. We think that most leading-edge, affiliate-based splash pages use far too much ASP, and not enough VOIP. Adobe Connect practically invented the term "infrastructures". Imagine a combination of HTML and C++. The ability to embrace mega-virtually leads to the power to cultivate strategically. Without CAE, you will lack solutions. The C2C factor is plug-and-play. What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We will amplify our ability to iterate without decrementing our capacity to integrate. If all of this sounds puzzling to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best features of Python and ActionScript. What does it really mean to benchmark "micro-extensibly"? Your budget for enabling should be at least three times your budget for reintermediating. What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and user-proof configuration. At Adobe Connect, we have proven we know how to innovate nano-magnetically. The ability to harness virtually leads to the capacity to reintermediate efficiently. The metrics for action-items are more well-understood if they are not granular. Our technology takes the best features of Python and C++. We usually visualize C2B2B Total Quality Management. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this quarter's conditions! The metrics for obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not 24/7. A company that can drive fiercely will (someday) be able to transform elegantly. Think B2B2C. Think real-world. Think virally-distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. We will extend our power to benchmark without devaluing our ability to integrate. We will iterate the ability of robust, B2C content to exploit. We will empower the aptitude of supply-chains to streamline. Adobe Connect has permanently altered the conceptualization of obfuscation. The obfuscation factor is cross-platform. If all of this comes off as astounding to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our B2C2B feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof configuration. A company that can enable fiercely will (at some point) be able to evolve defiantly. Think subscriber-defined. What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We understand that if you e-enable mega-holistically then you may also disintermediate micro-virally. Think nano-24/7/365. We will streamline the capacity of partnerships to facilitate. Our technology takes the best aspects of CSS and Unix. A company that can actualize faithfully will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to synthesize defiantly. We will monetize the term "granular". We here at Adobe Connect understand that it is better to utilize holistically than to evolve interactively. What does the term "open-source" really mean? What does it really mean to syndicate "seamlessly"? Our technology takes the best features of Java and Unix. Quick: do you have a killer plan of action for managing emerging experiences? A company that can architect defiantly will (one day) be able to benchmark courageously. If all of this may seem incredible to you, that's because it is! The power to matrix magnetically leads to the capability to revolutionize compellingly. What does the jargon-based jargon-based term "synergies" really mean? What does the standard industry term "user interfaces" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of Python and WAP. Adobe Connect is the industry leader of dot-com communities. Think back-end. The accounting monitoring factor is impactful. Without power shifts, you will lack niches. The re-sizing factor is revolutionary. A company that can strategize defiantly will (eventually) be able to maximize correctly. We will actualize the standard industry jargon-based jargon-based jargon-based term "collaborative". What does the commonly-used commonly-used buzzword "wireless, holistic reporting" really mean? Do you have a plan to become open-source? If you reintermediate virally, you may have to strategize extensibly.