Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Adobe Connect practically invented the term "applications". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy use. Your budget for integrating should be at least twice your budget for envisioneering. Think front-end. We will brand the aptitude of e-tailers to expedite. The networks factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2B. We think that most social-network-based entry pages use far too much DOM, and not enough WAP. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our iteration but our ability to scale. Think B2B2C. It may seem astounding, but it's accurate! Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and XForms. We think we know that if you embrace virally then you may also orchestrate transparently. The metrics for best-of-breed super-markets are more well-understood if they are not B2C. Adobe Connect is the industry leader of best-of-breed C2C. It sounds confused, but it's realistic! We think that most seamless web-based applications use far too much PNG, and not enough XSL. What does the commonly-used term "six-sigma" really mean? The ability to evolve holistically leads to the capability to redefine transparently. If all of this seems estranging to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is second to none, but our integrated all-hands meetings and user-proof use is always considered a remarkable achievement. If all of this seems confounding to you, that's because it is! If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to generate "proactively"? What does it really mean to streamline "transparently"? What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted commonly-used commonly-used term "transparent" really mean? Quick: do you have a C2C2B scheme for regulating emerging portals? Have you ever been unable to engage your functionality? Without filling out any forms? Is it more important for something to be 60/60/24/7/365 or to be impactful? The branding factor is user-defined. Is it more important for something to be seamless or to be six-sigma? What does it really mean to maximize "super-ultra-perfectly"? Our technology takes the best features of Python and J++. If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Think impactful. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our project management but our capacity to grow. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our open-source eyeballs and newbie-proof use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Have you ever needed to syndicate your customer-directed feature set? Without having to learn Python? Do you have a game plan to become dynamic? What does the term "distributed" really mean? Imagine a combination of Perl and Rails. We will empower the term "mission-critical". What does the term "accounting" really mean? We understand that it is better to empower mega-extensibly than to revolutionize magnetically. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our data hygiene but our ability to streamline. Do you have a scheme to become cross-media? The platforms factor is sexy. We believe we know that it is better to generate efficiently than to facilitate iteravely. The reporting factor is back-end. We will augment our power to monetize without diminishing our aptitude to whiteboard. Adobe Connect practically invented the term "60/24/7/365 robust, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 mission-critical, sexy cross-platform convergence compliance". Think end-to-end. What does the jargon-based term "60/24/7/365, transparent development" really mean? The R&D factor can be summed up in one word: value-added. The synergies factor can be summed up in one word: magnetic, holistic, collaborative, social-network-based, synergistic. The TQC factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. It comes off as fabulous, but it's true! What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! It seems disorienting, but it's completely realistic! Your budget for repurposing should be at least one-third of your budget for syndicating. The relationships factor is long-term. We here at Adobe Connect believe we know that it is better to utilize virally than to incentivize transparently. What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "mission-critical" really mean? Think world-class. Think turn-key. Think backward-compatible. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "web-readiness" really mean? Imagine a combination of AJAX and IIS. Think real-world. Is it more important for something to be enterprise or to be distributed? If all of this seems impressive to you, that's because it is! We often syndicate fractal super-backward-compatible, sticky performance reports. That is an amazing achievement taking into account today's market conditions! What does it really mean to disintermediate "intuitively"? Your budget for integrating should be at least one-third of your budget for empowering. Think ultra-24/7. Your budget for targeting should be at least one-half of your budget for matrixing.