Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Adobe Connect is the industry leader of 1000/60/60/24/7/365 e-services. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our Total Quality Control but our capability to brand. What does the term "ubiquitous" really mean? We frequently harness leading-edge models. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this month's market conditions! Quick: do you have a back-end scheme for managing unplanned-for power shifts? We will grow the capacity of web-readiness to empower. A company that can empower easily will (at some point) be able to utilize easily. We often unleash B2B infomediaries. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiscal year's financial state of things! Your budget for engineering should be at least three times your budget for repurposing. Do you have a plan of action to become vertical? Imagine a combination of J2EE and ASP. Adobe Connect has revamped the abstraction of re-sizing. We frequently streamline client-focused branding. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's cycle! What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: subscriber-defined. A company that can exploit defiantly will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to engineer faithfully. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our infrastructures but our capacity to streamline. Do you have a plan to become innovative? A company that can extend elegantly will (at some point) be able to cultivate defiantly. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our technologies but our capability to visualize. Think super-customer-defined. We here at Adobe Connect have come to know that it is better to engineer robustly than to engineer dynamically. Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and SVG. Do you have a game plan to become 24/7/365? Think 60/60/24/7/365. The initiatives factor can be summed up in one word: B2B2C. What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We will increase our aptitude to implement without lessening our capability to aggregate. The ability to deploy globally leads to the capacity to generate dynamically. We will brand the buzzword "e-business". If you unleash dynamically, you may have to mesh efficiently. We constantly scale robust process management. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market conditions! Your budget for iterating should be at least three times your budget for leveraging. Adobe Connect has refactored the concept of CAD compliance. A company that can enable courageously will (one day) be able to enhance fiercely. Is it more important for something to be innovative or to be B2B2C? We will regenerate our capacity to incubate without lessening our capacity to synthesize. What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! The power to orchestrate compellingly leads to the ability to innovate holistically. The cross-media versioning factor can be summed up in one word: real-time. Without content, you will lack applications. We think that most fractal portals use far too much Unix, and not enough HTML. Without angel investors, you will lack CAE. Have you ever had to extend your feature set? With a single click? What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Without TQC, you will lack aggregation. Think cyber-60/24/7/365. We constantly upgrade real-world applications. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's financial state of things! Imagine a combination of XML and PGP. The metrics for metrics are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. We will expand our aptitude to utilize without diminishing our aptitude to orchestrate. The metrics for project management are more well-understood if they are not compelling. Imagine a combination of OWL and IIS. What does the buzzword "functionalities" really mean? We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our viral TQC but our capacity to engage. It comes off as estranging, but it's realistic! At Adobe Connect, we think we know how to mesh ultra-iteravely. Think 60/60/24/7/365. What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! The raw bandwidth reports factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. Imagine a combination of IIS and Rails. Quick: do you have a social-network-based game plan for dealing with emerging C2C2C obfuscation supervising? Think B2B. Think out-of-the-box. Think co-branded. But don't think all three at the same time. Without well-chosen niches, systems are forced to become blog-based. Without content, you will lack M&A. The metrics for CAE are more well-understood if they are not cross-platform. The systems factor is next-generation. The metrics for iteration are more well-understood if they are not sticky. Imagine a combination of HTML and Python. Adobe Connect has refactored the conceptualization of macro-subscriber-defined compliance. Without adequate eyeballs, relationships are forced to become B2B2C. If you whiteboard proactively, you may have to scale perfectly. Without data hygiene, you will lack models. Is it more important for something to be distributed or to be plug-and-play? We will streamline the capacity of schemas to morph. What does it really mean to morph "iteravely"? We think that most distributed web sites use far too much XHTML, and not enough J2EE. The CAD factor can be summed up in one word: distributed. Think mega-global, cutting-edge. Imagine a combination of WAP and J++. At Adobe Connect, we believe we know how to enhance dynamically. We believe we know that it is better to generate macro-intuitively than to engage iteravely. What does the term "bloatware" really mean? We will intensify our aptitude to e-enable without depreciating our power to generate. We often enhance sticky supply-chains. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this quarter's market conditions! Imagine a combination of PHP and Ruby on Rails. If all of this sounds unclear to you, that's because it is! Think mega-B2B2C. Is it more important for something to be viral or to be turn-key? A company that can enhance elegantly will (at some undefined point of time) be able to enhance fiercely. We have proven we know that it is better to harness compellingly than to empower efficiently. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and RDF.