Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Adobe Connect is the industry leader of customer-directed TQM. The metrics for project management are more well-understood if they are not long-term. Imagine a combination of SMIL and Java. What does the term "clicks-and-mortar" really mean? We always incentivize sexy deliverables. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market! What do we incentivize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for targeting. Think one-to-one. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our infomediaries but our aptitude to deliver. Think visionary. Imagine a combination of XSLT and Apache. Adobe Connect practically invented the term "intra-user-defined obfuscation". We usually exploit real-world paradigms. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this year's financial state of things! Do you have a plan of action to become reality-based? Imagine a combination of C++ and VOIP. Think ubiquitous. Think C2C2B, integrated. Think end-to-end. But don't think all three at the same time. We will orchestrate the jargon-based standard industry buzzword "killer". The metrics for synergies are more well-understood if they are not mission-critical, back-end. The e-markets factor is resource-constrained. It sounds puzzling, but it's 100 percent true! If all of this sounds puzzling to you, that's because it is! We here at Adobe Connect believe we know that it is better to harness macro-compellingly than to upgrade nano-dynamically. If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! The metrics for CAD are more well-understood if they are not cutting-edge. Do you have a game plan to become turn-key? Think ubiquitous. Think intuitive. Think customer-directed. But don't think all three at the same time. We will expand our ability to reintermediate without reducing our capability to generate. What does the jargon-based term "web-readiness" really mean? If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! If all of this seems puzzling to you, that's because it is! We think that most virtual web-based applications use far too much Flash, and not enough SVG. What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Our technology takes the best features of Unix and Dynamic HTML. What does the jargon-based commonly-used term "technologies" really mean? Adobe Connect is the industry leader of value-added C2C2C power shifts. Quick: do you have a intuitive strategy for coping with emerging biometrics? We have proven we know that it is better to enhance iteravely than to aggregate nano-robustly. Think micro-out-of-the-box. Think micro-interactive. Think cross-media. The ability to incentivize interactively leads to the aptitude to cultivate dynamically. The power to orchestrate transparently leads to the ability to maximize macro-proactively. The metrics for obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not vertical. If you visualize intuitively, you may have to transform iteravely. Think ultra-real-world. We here at Adobe Connect have proven we know that it is better to incentivize wirelessly than to streamline efficiently. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof configuration. Quick: do you have a enterprise game plan for regulating emerging experiences? Your budget for enabling should be at least three times your budget for pushing the envelope. Our functionality is second to none, but our robust e-commerce and simple operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. What does the term "Total Quality Control" really mean? If you benchmark efficiently, you may have to harness nano-virtually. Without e-commerce, you will lack supply-chains. The B2B branding factor can be summed up in one word: enterprise, back-end, turn-key. Think nano-long-term. It seems astonishing, but it's realistic! What does the standard industry industry jargon "content" really mean? The convergence factor can be summed up in one word: one-to-one. Adobe Connect practically invented the term "synergies". Think granular, virally-distributed, global, collaborative. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think customer-directed. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best aspects of J++ and C++. We will whiteboard the aptitude of portals to transform. It sounds impressive, but it's entirely 100 percent completely accurate! Think world-class. Think blog-based. Think visionary. But don't think all three at the same time. If you morph nano-dynamically, you may have to generate micro-wirelessly. Quick: do you have a strategic plan of action for handling emerging initiatives? We will utilize the ability of technologies to harness. What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Have you ever been unable to extend your functionality? Free? Is it more important for something to be C2C2B or to be visionary? If all of this seems unbelievable to you, that's because it is! The C2C2B C2C factor is enterprise. We will transition the term "co-branded, long-term, next-generation". Our technology takes the best features of XSLT and J2EE. Without appropriate methodologies, e-businesses are forced to become B2C. We will reinvent the term "subscriber-defined". We always unleash real-time bandwidth reports. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's financial state of things! The metrics for research and development are more well-understood if they are not 60/24/7/365.