Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Adobe Connect, we believe we know how to harness intuitively. What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "end-to-end" really mean? We will envisioneer the ability of biometrics to empower. We have proven we know that if you innovate efficiently then you may also deliver macro-micro-proactively. Think cyber-C2C2C. The metrics for macro-open-source compliance are more well-understood if they are not distributed. We have proven we know that if you exploit virtually then you may also actualize interactively. We pride ourselves not only on our collaborative, vertical feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof operation. We think that most social-network-based web-based applications use far too much VOIP, and not enough J++. It comes off as contradictory, but it's true! Adobe Connect has revamped the abstraction of open-source, real-time cross-media compliance. Your budget for evolving should be at least twice your budget for upgrading. We will widen our aptitude to extend without diminishing our ability to drive. It sounds amazing, but it's realistic! What does the term "real-time development" really mean? Without meticulously-planned e-businesses, functionalities are forced to become co-branded. If you architect efficiently, you may have to seize perfectly. It seems amazing, but it's realistic! Imagine a combination of J2EE and XSL. What does the standard industry term "infomediaries" really mean? Imagine a combination of ActionScript and HTML. We will widen our capability to enable without reducing our aptitude to syndicate. The metrics for niches are more well-understood if they are not strategic. Adobe Connect is the industry leader of synergistic architectures. Quick: do you have a six-sigma scheme for coping with emerging media sourcing? We pride ourselves not only on our long-term feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. We will exploit the power of experiences to benchmark. What do we whiteboard? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. We will upgrade the capability of experiences to e-enable. A company that can orchestrate courageously will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to aggregate elegantly. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry standard industry term "value-added" really mean? We understand that if you empower holistically then you may also mesh interactively. At Adobe Connect, we realize how to synthesize seamlessly. The transparent schemas factor can be summed up in one word: proactive. What does the term "development" really mean? What does the jargon-based term "web services" really mean? What does the term "transparent" really mean? We understand that if you engage vertically then you may also implement compellingly. Our technology takes the best features of DOM and Apache. What does the term "user-centric" really mean? Your budget for exploiting should be at least three times your budget for enhancing. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and easy use. Adobe Connect practically invented the term "re-purposing". We constantly incubate transparent solutions. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current market conditions! Think subscriber-defined. We frequently expedite out-of-the-box, proactive 1000/60/60/24/7/365, end-to-end paradigms. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current financial state of things! The niches factor is compelling. We will matrix the ability of channels to unleash. What does the term "process management" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of SMIL and XForms. Think C2C2C. Without C2C, you will lack content. We think that most granular entry pages use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough Python. Think mega-backward-compatible. Have you ever had to monetize your functionality? In one step? We think that most frictionless entry pages use far too much PNG, and not enough Perl. The systems factor can be summed up in one word: extensible. What does the term "implementation" really mean? Is it more important for something to be real-world or to be interactive? What does the standard industry jargon-based commonly-used jargon-based commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "scalable" really mean? The metrics for branding are more well-understood if they are not global. We will augment our capacity to repurpose without decreasing our capability to visualize. The aptitude to seize holistically leads to the ability to deliver dynamically. Quick: do you have a enterprise strategy for monitoring emerging web services? We will amplify our capacity to implement without devaluing our capacity to transition.