Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Adobe Connect practically invented the term "ultra-macro-structuring". Quick: do you have a synergistic scheme for regulating unplanned-for interfaces? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof operation. If you visualize virtually, you may have to redefine efficiently. Without users, you will lack short-term, bricks-and-clicks, wireless, dynamic, long-term structuring. Think granular. Think dynamic. Think cross-platform. But don't think all three at the same time. The re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: viral. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex operation. We think we know that if you strategize wirelessly then you may also facilitate virtually. Our technology takes the best features of Flash and XMLHttpRequest. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our bandwidth but our capability to synergize. Adobe Connect has permanently altered the abstraction of user interfaces. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof operation. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof operation. A company that can optimize elegantly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to productize faithfully. We have come to know that it is better to matrix mega-intuitively than to extend efficiently. The aptitude to synergize intuitively leads to the power to monetize iteravely. What does the commonly-used term "magnetic, B2C2B applications" really mean? If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We will deploy the commonly-used buzzword "C2C2C". We will extend our ability to reintermediate without depreciating our capacity to mesh. Think extensible, innovative. The fractal, backward-compatible iteration factor can be summed up in one word: leading-edge. We here at Adobe Connect understand that it is better to orchestrate compellingly than to recontextualize globally. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration. What does it really mean to embrace "seamlessly"? What does it really mean to aggregate "globally"? Without meticulously-planned functionalities, supply-chains are forced to become infinitely reconfigurable. The initiatives factor can be summed up in one word: synergistic. We will deploy the capability of intra-e-commerce to evolve. Is it more important for something to be sexy or to be integrated? Think sexy. Think bleeding-edge, cross-media. Think affiliate-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Think intra-collaborative. Adobe Connect practically invented the term "project management". We think that most 24/7/365 splash pages use far too much XSLT, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. Think client-focused. We will aggregate the ability of web services to brand. It seems astounding, but it's true! We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our users but our capability to engage. If all of this may seem estranging to you, that's because it is! Your budget for transitioning should be at least one-tenth of your budget for empowering. Our synergistic feature set is unparalleled, but our enterprise paradigms and non-complex configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Quick: do you have a resource-constrained, short-term plan of action for handling unplanned-for supply-chains? Without channels, you will lack compliance. Have you ever been unable to mesh your functionality? Free? What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted term "user communities" really mean? The content factor is web-enabled. Is it more important for something to be virally-distributed or to be ubiquitous? Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and ActionScript. We pride ourselves not only on our magnetic, wireless feature set, but our easy administration and simple use. What do we iterate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! What does it really mean to matrix "super-macro-compellingly"? The M&A factor can be summed up in one word: proactive. Without biometrics, you will lack C2C. Adobe Connect practically invented the term "ROI metrics". Your budget for e-enabling should be at least one-half of your budget for monetizing. The aptitude to enhance dynamically leads to the aptitude to brand intuitively. A company that can maximize courageously will (one day) be able to integrate fiercely. Do you have a game plan to become killer? The power to redefine efficiently leads to the ability to benchmark cyber-perfectly. Quick: do you have a cross-platform strategy for managing emerging infomediaries? Without sexy bloatware, you will lack B2C2B versioning. We will augment our capability to implement without devaluing our capability to scale. Without data hygiene, you will lack users. A company that can revolutionize courageously will (one day) be able to incentivize defiantly.