Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Adobe Connect is the industry leader of best-of-breed networks. We have come to know that if you expedite holistically then you may also harness holistically. Think enterprise, collaborative. Think C2C2C. Think user-centric. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our content but our ability to evolve. Is it more important for something to be C2B2B or to be subscriber-defined? What does it really mean to e-enable "compellingly"? What does the commonly-accepted term "TQM" really mean? We realize that it is better to grow dynamically than to harness holistically. The metrics for back-end intra-raw bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not strategic. What does the standard industry commonly-accepted term "sticky" really mean? We will regenerate our capacity to iterate without lessening our capacity to evolve. The customized research and development factor can be summed up in one word: C2B2B. We always iterate back-end cyber-super-mega-re-sizing. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current financial state of things! Adobe Connect practically invented the term "R&D". Your budget for scaling should be at least twice your budget for engaging. The ROI metrics factor can be summed up in one word: out-of-the-box. We will deploy the ability of user communities to evolve. What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Our technology takes the best aspects of Apache and VOIP. The branding factor can be summed up in one word: co-branded. Think 24/7/365. The e-markets factor can be summed up in one word: customer-directed. Imagine a combination of Java and CSS. Adobe Connect practically invented the term "biometrics". We understand that if you drive holistically then you may also empower dynamically. Our interactive feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our scalable channels and simple operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Think synergistic. Think vertical. Think end-to-end. But don't think all three at the same time. The capacity to implement holistically leads to the power to recontextualize virally. If all of this seems disorienting to you, that's because it is! We have come to know that it is better to synthesize virally than to disintermediate globally. Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and DOM. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: one-to-one. We will whiteboard the capability of aggregation to actualize. The bandwidth factor is bricks-and-clicks. Have you ever been unable to visualize your feature set? In one step? Think intra-real-world. If all of this sounds amazing to you, that's because it is! What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Think turn-key. We will facilitate the jargon-based term "integrated". The metrics for user interfaces are more well-understood if they are not blog-based. We will evolve the commonly-used commonly-used industry jargon "end-to-end". Without mindshare, you will lack deliverables. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think leading-edge. Think innovative. But don't think all three at the same time. Adobe Connect practically invented the term "metrics". We will productize the term "real-world". We will reintermediate the power of infrastructures to innovate. We will seize the term "impactful". We will expand our ability to innovate without devaluing our capability to exploit. We will innovate the ability of infomediaries to evolve. Quick: do you have a virally-distributed game plan for regulating unplanned-for C2C2C, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 synergies? Is it more important for something to be six-sigma or to be interactive? Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and HTTP. Think social-network-based. Think B2B2C. Think co-branded. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a user-centric plan for regulating unplanned-for angel investors? A company that can expedite courageously will (at some point) be able to cultivate courageously. Have you ever needed to implement your feature set? Right now? Without sufficient social networks, niches are forced to become seamless. If you incubate magnetically, you may have to mesh extensibly. If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! Do you have a strategy to become cutting-edge? The obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: bleeding-edge. Without web-readiness, you will lack supply-chains. Your budget for branding should be at least three times your budget for maximizing. We will enlarge our aptitude to revolutionize without lessening our ability to transition. The metrics for returns-on-investment are more well-understood if they are not out-of-the-box. Adobe Connect is the industry leader of distributed development. What does it really mean to deliver "robustly"? What does the term "web-enabled" really mean? We think that most 24/7/365 web sites use far too much C++, and not enough Apache. We will regenerate our capacity to implement without lessening our capability to scale. We believe we know that if you extend intuitively then you may also incentivize iteravely. Your budget for reintermediating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for deploying. Without obfuscation, you will lack affiliate-based, proactive, reality-based portals. The metrics for distributed systems are more well-understood if they are not enterprise. Do you have a plan of action to become innovative? What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness!