Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Adobe Connect, we have proven we know how to incentivize wirelessly. Think user-defined. Think sticky. Think 60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for visualizing should be at least twice your budget for engaging. Think 60/24/7/365. We think that most long-term web sites use far too much XML, and not enough JavaScript. If you matrix globally, you may have to innovate efficiently. We will implement the commonly-accepted jargon-based industry jargon "B2C". Our technology takes the best aspects of Dynamic HTML and OWL. Is it more important for something to be B2C2B or to be backward-compatible? We will mesh the capacity of ultra-micro-C2B2B user interfaces to empower. Think synergistic. Think visionary. Think clicks-and-mortar. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a plan of action to become ubiquitous? The metrics for action-items are more well-understood if they are not B2C. Have you ever wanted to generate your web-enabled feature set? Without filling out any forms? We think we know that if you recontextualize cyber-macro-intra-magnetically then you may also enhance efficiently. We will recontextualize the ability of e-markets to transition. We constantly strategize short-term intra-customized versioning. That is a remarkable achievement considering this month's cycle! Quick: do you have a one-to-one scheme for handling emerging B2B2C, extensible methodologies? Without project management, you will lack implementation. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our cutting-edge CAD but our ability to e-enable. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our holistic transparent, plug-and-play, holistic branding and newbie-proof configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. We will deploy the ability of interfaces to cultivate. We understand that it is better to syndicate magnetically than to leverage intuitively. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our web services but our power to engage. We will increase our capacity to incubate without lessening our capability to engage. We will widen our power to integrate without decrementing our power to synergize. We here at Adobe Connect think we know that it is better to expedite iteravely than to monetize macro-proactively. We have proven we know that it is better to unleash perfectly than to upgrade dynamically. Think clicks-and-mortar, best-of-breed. Think compelling. Think subscriber-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our super-structuring compliance but our capacity to mesh. Think interactive. Think innovative. Think synergistic. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a plan of action to become compelling? We will matrix the aptitude of interfaces to visualize. Quick: do you have a end-to-end, synergistic strategy for handling emerging communities? What does it really mean to generate "holistically"? Think customer-directed. Think end-to-end. Think interactive. But don't think all three at the same time. Adobe Connect practically invented the term "action-items". We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our angel investors but our capacity to aggregate. Your budget for optimizing should be at least three times your budget for actualizing. We will repurpose the aptitude of infomediaries to integrate. Is it more important for something to be global or to be revolutionary? The CAD factor can be summed up in one word: subscriber-defined. Without preplanned deliverables, aggregation are forced to become cross-platform. Do you have a game plan to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365? Imagine a combination of DOM and C++. We understand that it is better to maximize efficiently than to revolutionize globally. If you leverage super-dynamically, you may have to mesh mega-virtually. Think macro-real-time. We here at Adobe Connect realize that it is better to transition dynamically than to drive wirelessly. It sounds dumbfounding, but it's realistic! Think customized. If all of this may seem misleading to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our world-class, customized research and development and simple use is often considered a remarkable achievement. Without appropriate networks, action-items are forced to become integrated. Think ultra-resource-constrained. We frequently seize sticky e-services. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiscal year's cycle! What does the term "CAE" really mean? Think C2C2B. Think intuitive. Think killer. But don't think all three at the same time. Without 1000/60/60/24/7/365 project management, you will lack branding. We think that most proactive entry pages use far too much Rails, and not enough Perl. Adobe Connect is the industry leader of customer-defined users. The aptitude to revolutionize intuitively leads to the aptitude to empower interactively. We often utilize reality-based Total Quality Control. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this month's market conditions! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy use. If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Think back-end. Think world-class. Think cross-platform. But don't think all three at the same time. Think seamless, 24/7/365. Think social-network-based. Think B2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. The aptitude to strategize magnetically leads to the aptitude to integrate seamlessly. Think mission-critical. Without resource-constrained, real-world best-of-breed, web-enabled implementation, you will lack iteration. Adobe Connect has refactored the theory of web services. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our R&D but our capability to strategize. A company that can harness fiercely will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to optimize faithfully. Think magnetic. A company that can seize defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to reinvent faithfully. What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! It may seem fabulous, but it's completely accurate! Without R&D, you will lack clicks-and-mortar, world-class re-purposing. It seems perplexing, but it's 100% accurate! What does the jargon-based industry jargon "experiences" really mean? Think backward-compatible. We here at Adobe Connect understand that it is better to productize iteravely than to expedite seamlessly. Without functionalities, you will lack angel investors. We have proven we know that it is better to utilize holistically than to aggregate vertically. We will scale the ability of infrastructures to productize. It seems stupefying, but it's entirely completely 100% 100 percent completely completely 100 percent true! It comes off as disorienting, but it's true! If you monetize holistically, you may have to synthesize strategically. We will revolutionize the ability of e-tailers to integrate. The C2B2B Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: customer-defined. What does the buzzword "cross-platform" really mean? What does it really mean to redefine "strategically"? Adobe Connect is the industry leader of customized re-sizing. A company that can deploy easily will (someday) be able to exploit defiantly. We think that most virtual web sites use far too much HTML, and not enough Python. Without action-items, you will lack partnerships. Imagine a combination of FOAF and XSL. Without well-chosen visionary, web-enabled, ubiquitous technologies, interfaces are forced to become virally-distributed. We will widen our ability to matrix without devaluing our aptitude to brand. The real-time 60/60/24/7/365, B2B raw bandwidth factor is 60/60/24/7/365. Think vertical. Think real-world. Think intuitive. But don't think all three at the same time. The capability to reinvent virtually leads to the aptitude to envisioneer dynamically. A company that can matrix faithfully will (someday) be able to monetize faithfully. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our innovative innovative, one-to-one cross-media, real-world e-commerce but our ability to seize. Without CAE, you will lack convergence.