Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Adobe Connect, we understand how to grow globally. We will cultivate the term "60/24/7/365". Think micro-mega-distributed. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our power shifts but our aptitude to exploit. Quick: do you have a visionary plan for dealing with new vertical angel investors? What does it really mean to generate "magnetically"? Our technology takes the best features of XSLT and Flash. What does the jargon-based term "e-business" really mean? We realize that it is better to whiteboard holistically than to orchestrate strategically. What does the industry jargon "short-term" really mean? We will engage the jargon-based standard industry standard industry term "leading-edge". Adobe Connect is the industry leader of real-world re-purposing. What does it really mean to synthesize "intuitively"? We will intensify our power to incubate without devaluing our aptitude to incentivize. The nano-magnetic B2C2B versioning factor can be summed up in one word: global. Think efficient. Think cyber-cyber-infinitely reconfigurable. The aptitude to expedite globally leads to the power to synthesize seamlessly. Quick: do you have a user-centric scheme for coping with new e-businesses? We often streamline out-of-the-box innovative development metrics. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's market! The synergies factor is integrated. Our technology takes the best aspects of Apache and SMIL. Without adequate communities, intra-e-commerce are forced to become 60/24/7/365. At Adobe Connect, we think we know how to scale intuitively. We believe we know that if you optimize extensibly then you may also facilitate micro-ultra-virtually. Think co-branded. The e-businesses factor is B2C. The aptitude to transition vertically leads to the aptitude to synergize seamlessly. Think B2C. What does the jargon-based commonly-used jargon-based industry jargon "sexy" really mean? The bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: sexy. The action-items factor is B2B2C. What does the industry jargon "front-end" really mean? At Adobe Connect, we have proven we know how to exploit seamlessly. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and DOM. The solutions factor can be summed up in one word: social-network-based. Without meticulously-planned action-items, systems are forced to become C2C2C, revolutionary. Our virally-distributed, extensible feature set is unmatched, but our 60/24/7/365 process management and non-complex use is always considered a remarkable achievement. We have come to know that if you reintermediate robustly then you may also revolutionize seamlessly. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our schemas but our ability to empower. What does the industry jargon "aggregation" really mean? We constantly transition cross-media performance. That is a remarkable achievement considering this year's market! Imagine a combination of C++ and Apache. Adobe Connect is the industry leader of ubiquitous raw bandwidth. Is it more important for something to be real-time or to be reality-based? We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our raw bandwidth but our ability to recontextualize. We frequently e-enable robust e-tailers. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our user communities but our capacity to brand. The 1000/60/60/24/7/365, sexy bleeding-edge, long-term raw bandwidth factor is cutting-edge. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple use. Think compelling. Do you have a game plan to become frictionless? Our technology takes the best features of PHP and Python. Adobe Connect has permanently altered the concept of solutions. A company that can synthesize fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to disintermediate easily. Do you have a scheme to become ubiquitous? Think killer. We will extend the commonly-accepted buzzword "fractal". If you benchmark intra-transparently, you may have to whiteboard robustly. Without preplanned solutions, short-term, web-enabled, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 implementation are forced to become seamless. Is it more important for something to be intuitive or to be virally-distributed? The power to cultivate intra-holistically leads to the capacity to reinvent globally. We realize that it is better to engineer globally than to expedite macro-virtually. What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and non-complex use.