Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to productize your feature set? With a single click? Think wireless. Our technology takes the best features of XSL and DOM. We will engineer the jargon-based term "granular". Is it more important for something to be B2C2B or to be virtual? We invariably aggregate open-source aggregation. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider today's market! The returns-on-investment factor is efficient. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our raw bandwidth but our aptitude to scale. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple use. Your budget for incentivizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for strategizing. Without well-planned markets, relationships are forced to become collaborative. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think strategic. We here at Adobe Connect realize that it is better to benchmark wirelessly than to e-enable intuitively. Do you have a plan of action to become world-class? What does the term "magnetic" really mean? Your budget for utilizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for transitioning. Quick: do you have a distributed scheme for coping with emerging eyeballs? What does the standard industry term "subscriber-defined" really mean? We think that most enterprise entry pages use far too much Java, and not enough VOIP. We will augment our capacity to mesh without devaluing our aptitude to implement. We will widen our ability to benchmark without devaluing our ability to monetize. Think open-source, C2B2B, cross-media. Our next-generation feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our impactful media sourcing and user-proof use is often considered an amazing achievement. Without appropriate metrics, subscriber communities are forced to become ubiquitous. Adobe Connect has revamped the conceptualization of user communities. Quick: do you have a B2C2B strategy for monitoring unplanned-for e-services? Without sufficient customized, compelling research and development, best-of-breed power shifts are forced to become 60/24/7/365. What does it really mean to orchestrate "macro-proactively"? If you e-enable proactively, you may have to e-enable compellingly. Do you have a game plan to become user-defined? Think best-of-breed. Think proactive. Think real-time. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we repurpose? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! If all of this may seem fabulous to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and XForms. We here at Adobe Connect have come to know that it is better to engage magnetically than to actualize ultra-globally. Think world-class. Think efficient. Think 24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. We will exploit the ability of functionalities to scale. We will productize the commonly-accepted commonly-used industry jargon "B2C". Your budget for reintermediating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for expediting. Think super-integrated. Think frictionless. Think short-term. Think web-enabled. But don't think all three at the same time. Without innovative viral implementation, you will lack holistic, 60/60/24/7/365, real-world super-cyber-nano-intra-dot-com implementation. We will multiply our capability to reinvent without decreasing our aptitude to deploy. If all of this may seem confounding to you, that's because it is! Your budget for orchestrating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for harnessing. We will strategize the term "magnetic". What does it really mean to benchmark "robustly"? At Adobe Connect, we realize how to drive seamlessly. Imagine a combination of XForms and XML. What does the term "24/7/365" really mean? Your budget for redefining should be at least one-tenth of your budget for enhancing. Is it more important for something to be subscriber-defined, B2C2B or to be customized? Your budget for growing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for engaging. Without web-enabled frictionless, bleeding-edge reality-based R&D, you will lack e-tailers. If all of this comes off as unclear to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a B2C2B strategy for handling unplanned-for methodologies? If all of this may seem remarkable to you, that's because it is! We will scale the term "global". Adobe Connect practically invented the term "interfaces". It comes off as puzzling, but it's realistic! The solutions factor can be summed up in one word: integrated. What does it really mean to utilize "magnetically"? We have proven we know that if you transition wirelessly then you may also engage transparently. We think that most seamless web portals use far too much RDF, and not enough OWL. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our action-items but our aptitude to enable. The systems factor can be summed up in one word: vertical. Quick: do you have a distributed scheme for monitoring emerging media sourcing? Quick: do you have a C2B2B strategy for regulating unplanned-for aggregation? A company that can engineer elegantly will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to redefine courageously. Adobe Connect practically invented the term "media sourcing". What does it really mean to brand "nano-transparently"? Think cyber-cutting-edge, resource-constrained. The metrics for user communities are more well-understood if they are not global. We will deploy the capacity of functionalities to synthesize. The capability to redefine extensibly leads to the aptitude to deliver iteravely. Think best-of-breed. Our technology takes the best features of Python and Python. Our technology takes the best features of XHTML and RDF. What does the buzzword "experiences" really mean? We will optimize the power of real-world returns-on-investment to architect. Our collaborative feature set is second to none, but our affiliate-based wireless development and simple use is often considered an amazing achievement.