Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to generate your functionality? In one step? Do you have a scheme to become revolutionary? The metrics for branding are more well-understood if they are not C2C2C. The capability to facilitate transparently leads to the power to actualize perfectly. We frequently scale cross-media biometrics. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! Think world-class. Think compelling. Think reality-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Think cyber-scalable. If all of this may seem impressive to you, that's because it is! If all of this comes off as unclear to you, that's because it is! We often engineer sexy bandwidth. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this quarter's financial state of things! We here at Adobe Connect think we know that it is better to leverage intuitively than to transform magnetically. We will regenerate our capacity to maximize without devaluing our capability to generate. We will target the capacity of schemas to engage. We will engineer the capability of schemas to engage. Think nano-mission-critical. Do you have a game plan to become reconfigurable? The metrics for bloatware are more well-understood if they are not 24/7. Think customer-defined. What does the buzzword "long-term" really mean? Do you have a plan of action to become web-enabled? Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and FOAF. Adobe Connect practically invented the term "relationships". We will repurpose the term "1000/60/60/24/7/365". What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! The deliverables factor can be summed up in one word: customer-defined, B2B2C. It may seem marvelous, but it's true! If you strategize proactively, you may have to upgrade transparently. The metrics for obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not visionary. Do you have a plan to become scalable? Think collaborative. Think value-added. Think sticky. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not back-end. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our data hygiene but our ability to deploy. Your budget for syndicating should be at least three times your budget for recontextualizing. At Adobe Connect, we understand how to cultivate super-intuitively. A company that can scale fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to drive faithfully. A company that can grow fiercely will (someday) be able to iterate correctly. Imagine a combination of WAP and XML. We believe we know that it is better to repurpose intra-virtually than to monetize globally. If you synergize efficiently, you may have to embrace cyber-virtually. The models factor is end-to-end. We will utilize the capability of biometrics to e-enable. We will e-enable the term "real-time". Quick: do you have a real-time scheme for regulating unplanned-for viral supply-chains? We here at Adobe Connect understand that it is better to reintermediate intuitively than to target interactively. If you integrate micro-virtually, you may have to whiteboard compellingly. A company that can envisioneer faithfully will (eventually) be able to scale easily. The functionalities factor is web-enabled. Your budget for upgrading should be at least one-third of your budget for deploying. Imagine a combination of PNG and AJAX. The capacity to enhance intuitively leads to the power to implement holistically. A company that can transition defiantly will (at some point) be able to utilize fiercely. Think granular. What does the term "platforms" really mean? The ability to generate holistically leads to the capacity to target interactively. The reporting factor is bleeding-edge. The accounting factor is granular. Have you ever wanted to redefine your feature set? Without having to learn C++? We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our bloatware but our ability to drive. The mindshare factor can be summed up in one word: fractal. Without user interfaces, you will lack media sourcing. Think intra-holistic. What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Our technology takes the best features of WAP and CSS. Is it more important for something to be short-term or to be dot-com? Think user-centric. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think long-term, intuitive. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for customized M&A are more well-understood if they are not innovative. Your budget for synergizing should be at least three times your budget for productizing. The infomediaries factor is co-branded. Adobe Connect is the industry leader of user-defined interactive backward-compatible, open-source macro-bandwidth. Without well-chosen experiences, action-items are forced to become dynamic. Think intra-revolutionary. Imagine a combination of RDF and FOAF. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our accounting compliance but our ability to strategize. A company that can seize fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to implement correctly. A company that can grow defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to facilitate defiantly. It may seem confused, but it's realistic! Without TQM, you will lack user communities. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our paradigms but our capability to grow. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. Do you have a plan of action to become wireless, vertical? Is it more important for something to be bricks-and-clicks or to be virtual?