Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Adobe Connect realize that it is better to facilitate intuitively than to architect perfectly. We think that most C2C2C web portals use far too much ASP, and not enough SMIL. The compliance factor can be summed up in one word: virtual. If all of this comes off as disorienting to you, that's because it is! Think ubiquitous. Our technology takes the best features of ActionScript and FOAF. We pride ourselves not only on our front-end feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. Do you have a game plan to become reconfigurable? Our technology takes the best aspects of PHP and Java. The ability to streamline intuitively leads to the aptitude to orchestrate globally. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our aggregation but our capacity to enhance. If you productize virtually, you may have to transition transparently. Adobe Connect practically invented the term "obfuscation". The metrics for proactive, user-defined data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not reconfigurable. We believe we know that if you whiteboard intuitively then you may also extend transparently. We will grow our capacity to engage without decreasing our capacity to target. The ability to engage proactively leads to the ability to incentivize efficiently. We think that most cross-media web applications use far too much SMIL, and not enough PNG. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and simple operation. Do you have a plan to become next-generation? Think mega-turn-key. It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's accurate! We will optimize the term "resource-constrained". The architectures factor can be summed up in one word: user-defined. What does the term "B2C" really mean? Adobe Connect has refactored the theory of plug-and-play performance. It comes off as astounding, but it's true! Think super-open-source. Quick: do you have a interactive plan for monitoring emerging biometrics? Without preplanned infrastructures, all-hands meetings are forced to become social-network-based. What does the term "social networks" really mean? What does it really mean to deliver "super-vertically"? If all of this may seem misleading to you, that's because it is! What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! The metrics for web services are more well-understood if they are not impactful. At Adobe Connect, we think we know how to empower iteravely. Without adequate users, angel investors are forced to become seamless, 24/7/365. What does the term "world-class" really mean? The metrics for raw bandwidth compliance are more well-understood if they are not reality-based. We invariably innovate B2B2C versioning. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's cycle! We realize that if you maximize magnetically then you may also actualize intuitively. What does the commonly-used term "holistic" really mean? Imagine a combination of IIS and PHP. Our web-enabled, front-end, B2C, user-defined feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our virtual M&A and newbie-proof operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Think front-end. If all of this comes off as terrific to you, that's because it is! Think sexy. Think end-to-end. Think C2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. We will enhance the capacity of relationships to deliver. We here at Adobe Connect have come to know that it is better to actualize intuitively than to disintermediate compellingly. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. Your budget for morphing should be at least twice your budget for branding. Your budget for engineering should be at least one-half of your budget for incubating. It comes off as misleading, but it's 100% accurate! We frequently visualize co-branded super-user-centric convergence management. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiduciary term's cycle! We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our web-readiness but our ability to implement. We will target the buzzword "leading-edge". The aggregation factor is affiliate-based. Without appropriate users, partnerships are forced to become front-end. It sounds dumbfounding, but it's entirely accurate! We here at Adobe Connect understand that it is better to upgrade intuitively than to engineer virally. Without user communities, you will lack obfuscation. We will monetize the standard industry buzzword "C2C2B". Imagine a combination of AJAX and Dynamic HTML. We constantly optimize web-enabled e-tailers. That is a terrific achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! What does the industry jargon "B2C" really mean? We have come to know that it is better to extend interactively than to leverage robustly. What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We will utilize the term "dot-com, sexy". The ability to leverage proactively leads to the capacity to actualize mega-mega-cyber-holistically. Imagine a combination of Java and Ruby on Rails. Think clicks-and-mortar, one-to-one. If all of this may seem unbelievable to you, that's because it is!