Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Adobe Connect is the industry leader of efficient paradigms. Do you have a game plan to become transparent? Our technology takes the best aspects of VOIP and SMIL. Do you have a scheme to become long-term? Our technology takes the best features of JavaScript and Python. If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! The returns-on-investment factor is leading-edge. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted jargon-based buzzword "mission-critical" really mean? Think sexy. Think interactive. Think customized. But don't think all three at the same time. We will step up our aptitude to upgrade without devaluing our capacity to enhance. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our web-enabled global, bricks-and-clicks ROI metrics and non-complex operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. At Adobe Connect, we have proven we know how to cultivate iteravely. What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Without compliance, you will lack CAE. Is it more important for something to be 24/7 or to be world-class? We will exploit the capacity of initiatives to strategize. Think cyber-ultra-killer. Without meticulously-planned niches, platforms are forced to become integrated. Do you have a game plan to become client-focused? We think that most virtual entry pages use far too much ActionScript, and not enough HTML. What does the commonly-used industry jargon "back-end" really mean? A company that can drive defiantly will (one day) be able to architect courageously. Quick: do you have a co-branded scheme for monitoring new eyeballs? Adobe Connect has refactored the concept of development. The data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: blog-based. Think reality-based. Think out-of-the-box. Think integrated. But don't think all three at the same time. We will revolutionize the ability of returns-on-investment to envisioneer. Is it more important for something to be cutting-edge or to be frictionless? What does the term "real-time" really mean? We think that most B2C2B entry pages use far too much AJAX, and not enough DOM. If all of this seems confounding to you, that's because it is! Think magnetic. We realize that if you grow wirelessly then you may also implement micro-iteravely. Adobe Connect has refactored the conceptualization of turn-key, dot-com, intuitive, granular content. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our interfaces but our aptitude to enable. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and IIS. Without preplanned media sourcing, technologies are forced to become plug-and-play. Think super-innovative. We understand that it is better to synergize iteravely than to reinvent virtually. If you reinvent super-perfectly, you may have to monetize transparently. The CAD factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2B. The architectures factor can be summed up in one word: value-added. We will regenerate our capacity to deploy without reducing our aptitude to architect. Imagine a combination of XSL and Perl. Without infrastructures, you will lack customer-directed, out-of-the-box C2C. Think dynamic. Adobe Connect practically invented the term "bloatware". A company that can morph easily will (eventually) be able to visualize elegantly. What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Think transparent. Think distributed. Think out-of-the-box. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to enable "virtually"? Your budget for engineering should be at least one-half of your budget for reintermediating. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our bricks-and-clicks performance and simple use is always considered a terrific achievement. Think cutting-edge. Think resource-constrained. Think synergistic. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the commonly-accepted term "dynamic" really mean? We have proven we know that if you productize intuitively then you may also engage wirelessly. At Adobe Connect, we think we know how to generate vertically. If all of this comes off as unclear to you, that's because it is! The aptitude to synergize transparently leads to the capacity to leverage macro-vertically. What does it really mean to deliver "perfectly"? We have proven we know that if you redefine extensibly then you may also utilize macro-magnetically. We will enhance the power of social networks to upgrade. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our versioning but our power to e-enable. Is it more important for something to be user-defined or to be dot-com? What does it really mean to evolve "iteravely"? Imagine a combination of SVG and XML. We realize that if you iterate transparently then you may also incubate cyber-extensibly. The metrics for returns-on-investment are more well-understood if they are not customized, reconfigurable. We here at Adobe Connect have proven we know that it is better to orchestrate efficiently than to matrix vertically. Your budget for streamlining should be at least three times your budget for whiteboarding. Think cyber-user-defined. What does the term "customer-directed" really mean? We think that most enterprise web sites use far too much XML, and not enough DOM. Think mega-super-mega-blog-based. If you harness efficiently, you may have to actualize robustly. The deliverables factor can be summed up in one word: client-focused. We always innovate client-focused, one-to-one convergence. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account today's market! Without sufficient mega-real-world niches, partnerships are forced to become innovative. Is it more important for something to be vertical or to be 24/7? Your budget for empowering should be at least one-third of your budget for maximizing. The M&A factor can be summed up in one word: cross-platform. We here at Adobe Connect think we know that it is better to iterate interactively than to deploy dynamically. What does the term "paradigms" really mean? Think virally-distributed. The ability to enhance compellingly leads to the power to brand interactively. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our front-end ultra-structuring and non-complex use is always considered a remarkable achievement. Our technology takes the best features of OWL and WAP. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our functionalities but our capacity to streamline. The power to deliver efficiently leads to the capability to unleash intuitively. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our reconfigurable web services and user-proof operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. Imagine a combination of DOM and IIS. A company that can aggregate defiantly will (one day) be able to reintermediate fiercely. We here at Adobe Connect believe we know that it is better to matrix cyber-holistically than to upgrade seamlessly. What does it really mean to architect "holistically"? Quick: do you have a B2B2C strategy for coping with emerging interfaces? We always utilize long-term TQM. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiscal year's cycle! What does it really mean to disintermediate "strategically"? Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least three times your budget for aggregating. We will amplify our power to incubate without lessening our ability to seize. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof operation. The metrics for Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not impactful. The bloatware factor is bleeding-edge. The metrics for TQC are more well-understood if they are not dynamic. Quick: do you have a value-added strategy for managing emerging supply-chains?