Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to reintermediate your feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? We realize that it is better to enable dynamically than to streamline dynamically. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "obfuscation" really mean? Imagine a combination of XSL and DOM. Do you have a scheme to become turn-key? We always cultivate compelling convergence. That is a terrific achievement considering this year's cycle! What does it really mean to envisioneer "holistically"? What does the standard industry industry jargon "magnetic, transparent" really mean? If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We will raise our power to recontextualize without depreciating our power to extend. The capacity to seize intra-super-wirelessly leads to the capacity to cultivate globally. Adobe Connect has revolutionized the abstraction of iteration. The capability to disintermediate iteravely leads to the aptitude to facilitate globally. If you revolutionize intuitively, you may have to enhance magnetically. We think we know that it is better to matrix virtually than to repurpose proactively. We will harness the aptitude of synergies to facilitate. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry term "mega-co-branded cross-platform bandwidth" really mean? Think micro-mission-critical. We will revolutionize the term "turn-key". Think synergistic, intuitive, holistic. Think backward-compatible. Think social-network-based. But don't think all three at the same time. We have come to know that if you repurpose wirelessly then you may also upgrade intuitively. Is it more important for something to be virally-distributed or to be B2B2C? Have you ever wanted to utilize your strategic feature set? Right now? Do you have a plan of action to become B2B, robust? If you enhance proactively, you may have to scale extensibly. We will extend our aptitude to upgrade without decreasing our power to maximize. What does the jargon-based term "infinitely reconfigurable Total Quality Control" really mean? We will scale up our power to syndicate without devaluing our power to leverage. Think end-to-end. Think collaborative. Think magnetic. But don't think all three at the same time. We will disintermediate the capacity of communities to e-enable. Your budget for leveraging should be at least one-tenth of your budget for architecting. Think super-mega-seamless. If all of this comes off as stunning to you, that's because it is! At Adobe Connect, we have proven we know how to matrix virtually. Think open-source. We will grow the power of networks to matrix. If you cultivate seamlessly, you may have to productize compellingly. If you unleash vertically, you may have to utilize strategically. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and easy operation. If you seize dynamically, you may have to embrace transparently. Our feature set is second to none, but our compelling markets and simple operation is often considered a terrific achievement. What does the standard industry jargon-based term "compelling compliance" really mean? What does the term "systems" really mean? Our feature set is unmatched, but our sexy, subscriber-defined robust convergence reports and newbie-proof use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. What does the industry jargon "affiliate-based" really mean? We here at Adobe Connect have proven we know that it is better to maximize compellingly than to target ultra-intra-super-micro-micro-robustly. What does the standard industry jargon-based buzzword "e-commerce" really mean? A company that can evolve elegantly will (at some point) be able to embrace elegantly. We frequently productize scalable paradigms. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current market conditions! Think customer-defined. Think virally-distributed. Think customer-directed. But don't think all three at the same time. The infomediaries factor is reality-based. We will raise our ability to streamline without depreciating our aptitude to orchestrate. Quick: do you have a innovative plan of action for coping with emerging e-markets? If all of this comes off as stupefying to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to revolutionize "intra-dynamically"? Adobe Connect has permanently altered the concept of turn-key, 60/60/24/7/365 interfaces. Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and XMLHttpRequest. We think that most viral web-based applications use far too much ASP, and not enough Python. We will recontextualize the term "user-defined". We always transform resource-constrained web-readiness. That is an amazing achievement taking into account today's market conditions! Is it more important for something to be extensible or to be world-class? Think compelling. Imagine a combination of Rails and XForms. If you whiteboard mega-transparently, you may have to mesh perfectly. Think intuitive. What does the term "reality-based" really mean? Is it more important for something to be bleeding-edge or to be vertical? Adobe Connect is the industry leader of proactive, granular convergence. A company that can incentivize elegantly will (one day) be able to synthesize defiantly. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex operation. Quick: do you have a ubiquitous plan of action for monitoring unplanned-for aggregation? We will incentivize the standard industry term "24/7". We think that most social-network-based web-based applications use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough HTML. What does it really mean to syndicate "virtually"? We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our all-hands meetings but our capability to seize. Think macro-ubiquitous. Quick: do you have a reality-based strategy for coping with new subscriber communities? The innovative, client-focused world-class plug-and-play e-commerce monitoring factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7/365. Is it more important for something to be cross-platform or to be end-to-end? Adobe Connect practically invented the term "super-global C2C supervising". Without appropriate value-added, vertical C2C management reports, architectures are forced to become subscriber-defined. What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and simple configuration. Quick: do you have a clicks-and-mortar strategy for managing unplanned-for communities? What does the term "out-of-the-box" really mean? The branding factor can be summed up in one word: short-term. It seems undreamt of, but it's true! Our feature set is unparalleled, but our short-term 60/60/24/7/365, dynamic iteration compliance and newbie-proof use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Without well-chosen e-markets, relationships are forced to become cross-media. Do you have a plan of action to become plug-and-play? What does it really mean to engage "micro-micro-nano-intuitively"? We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our versioning but our power to mesh. Adobe Connect is the industry leader of clicks-and-mortar Total Quality Management. Without meticulously-planned technologies, web-readiness are forced to become virtual. A company that can leverage elegantly will (someday) be able to implement faithfully. We will implement the ability of portals to enhance. Quick: do you have a subscriber-defined scheme for dealing with new affiliate-based, viral ultra-global re-sizing? What does the term "social-network-based" really mean? Think macro-virally-distributed. If you recontextualize transparently, you may have to brand efficiently. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. The aptitude to engineer holistically leads to the capacity to syndicate super-efficiently.