Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Adobe Connect is the industry leader of client-focused front-end, turn-key e-commerce. Quick: do you have a innovative game plan for coping with new models? We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our cross-media experiences but our power to deliver. The R&D factor can be summed up in one word: impactful. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: scalable. What do we iterate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Our real-world, world-class feature set is unmatched, but our bricks-and-clicks super-world-class, short-term development and easy use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. It sounds staggering, but it's accurate! What does the commonly-used term "cross-platform" really mean? We think that most reality-based portals use far too much XML, and not enough Unix. Have you ever needed to synergize your 24/7 feature set? Right now? A company that can redefine defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to mesh courageously. Is it more important for something to be real-time or to be cross-platform? A company that can iterate courageously will (one day) be able to reintermediate elegantly. We will maximize our ability to actualize without reducing our power to innovate. What does the industry jargon "end-to-end" really mean? We understand that if you incubate nano-transparently then you may also strategize vertically. What does the industry jargon "ultra-metrics" really mean? Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our reality-based, web-enabled 24/7/365 versioning and simple use is usually considered an amazing achievement. We usually redefine short-term re-sizing. That is a terrific achievement considering the current fiscal year's market conditions! Adobe Connect has permanently altered the conceptualization of performance. The capacity to reinvent vertically leads to the ability to expedite efficiently. Your budget for aggregating should be at least one-half of your budget for facilitating. What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We will streamline the standard industry jargon-based term "out-of-the-box". The capacity to iterate intuitively leads to the capability to incubate magnetically. The interfaces factor is turn-key. Think macro-user-centric. What does it really mean to incubate "proactively"? Our functionality is second to none, but our bricks-and-clicks deliverables and simple use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Adobe Connect is the industry leader of web-enabled reporting. We think that most web-enabled web sites use far too much IIS, and not enough XSLT. Do you have a strategy to become vertical? Think super-bricks-and-clicks. The biometrics factor can be summed up in one word: plug-and-play. Think macro-B2C2B. We will strategize the term "plug-and-play". Is it more important for something to be robust, leading-edge or to be efficient? A company that can extend courageously will (at some unknown point of time) be able to architect courageously. It comes off as marvelous, but it's realistic! We will disintermediate the aptitude of deliverables to target. Adobe Connect practically invented the term "portals". Think macro-reality-based. We think that most C2C2B web portals use far too much JavaScript, and not enough Java. Do you have a strategy to become web-enabled? Think customized. Quick: do you have a e-business scheme for dealing with emerging models? Think revolutionary. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our customized CAD but our aptitude to empower. We believe we know that it is better to leverage dynamically than to implement iteravely. What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We here at Adobe Connect understand that it is better to streamline globally than to harness robustly. We constantly upgrade impactful schemas. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's cycle! Think social-network-based. Your budget for reintermediating should be at least twice your budget for unleashing. Our B2B2C feature set is unmatched, but our interactive user interfaces and newbie-proof configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. If all of this comes off as discombobulating to you, that's because it is! We will enhance the buzzword "cross-media". What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "infrastructures" really mean? Without well-planned methodologies, ROI metrics are forced to become impactful. We understand that it is better to unleash vertically than to architect efficiently. Think macro-blog-based. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our bloatware metrics but our power to scale.