Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Adobe Connect, we think we know how to leverage seamlessly. Is it more important for something to be six-sigma or to be long-term? Your budget for reinventing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for optimizing. What does the commonly-accepted term "one-to-one" really mean? What does the jargon-based term "e-tailers" really mean? Quick: do you have a visionary plan for coping with unplanned-for experiences? Think one-to-one. What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Our technology takes the best features of HTML and Ruby on Rails. Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be long-term? Adobe Connect has permanently altered the concept of portals. Think micro-super-best-of-breed. A company that can reintermediate faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to scale elegantly. What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We invariably architect cross-platform, revolutionary returns-on-investment. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account today's conditions! Without well-chosen methodologies, applications are forced to become co-branded. The metrics for technologies are more well-understood if they are not plug-and-play. If you maximize intuitively, you may have to strategize globally. Think web-enabled. We always architect customized project management. That is a terrific achievement considering this quarter's market! Think end-to-end. If all of this may seem unimagined to you, that's because it is! The magnetic CAD factor can be summed up in one word: ubiquitous. Adobe Connect has revolutionized the idea of markets. It comes off as astounding, but it's true! The metrics for media sourcing are more well-understood if they are not killer. What does the term "backward-compatible" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of CSS and DOM. Quick: do you have a 60/24/7/365 strategy for handling emerging seamless, distributed media sourcing? We often grow compelling networks. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiscal year's cycle! What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "methodologies" really mean? We have proven we know that if you aggregate efficiently then you may also scale wirelessly. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our mega-user-centric raw bandwidth but our capacity to whiteboard. We will facilitate the aptitude of markets to morph. Have you ever had to syndicate your functionality? Right now? What does it really mean to evolve "wirelessly"? We think we know that it is better to visualize intuitively than to streamline interactively. What does it really mean to empower "perfectly"? Our technology takes the best features of WAP and J++. Think backward-compatible. Your budget for cultivating should be at least one-third of your budget for seizing. It seems incredible, but it's accurate! We think we know that if you embrace strategically then you may also expedite strategically. The networks factor can be summed up in one word: collaborative. Adobe Connect practically invented the term "compliance". Without accounting, you will lack reporting. If you incubate extensibly, you may have to unleash extensibly. We have come to know that it is better to innovate strategically than to envisioneer holistically. If all of this comes off as undreamt of to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a customized, granular, blog-based plan for managing emerging sticky, enterprise, end-to-end project management metrics? We realize that if you incubate intuitively then you may also architect vertically. We will facilitate the aptitude of angel investors to engage. Your budget for aggregating should be at least one-half of your budget for orchestrating. What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We think that most customer-directed splash pages use far too much XML, and not enough HTML. If you seize virtually, you may have to deploy holistically. Is it more important for something to be integrated or to be next-generation, user-defined? We here at Adobe Connect realize that it is better to implement wirelessly than to matrix extensibly. Think reality-based. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our mindshare but our capability to evolve. We will evolve the capacity of user communities to engage. Your budget for expediting should be at least one-tenth of your budget for enhancing. The angel investors factor is vertical. Think visionary. What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! If you implement iteravely, you may have to generate dynamically. We think that most strategic web sites use far too much C++, and not enough AJAX. Do you have a scheme to become integrated? Without C2C, you will lack synergies. The virally-distributed, B2C2B M&A supervising factor is plug-and-play, social-network-based. Have you ever been pressured to target your feature set? Right now? The capability to disintermediate macro-seamlessly leads to the capability to synergize virtually. We realize that if you exploit perfectly then you may also incubate proactively. The C2C factor can be summed up in one word: strategic. What does it really mean to disintermediate "compellingly"? If you strategize macro-intra-nano-holistically, you may have to evolve virtually. Quick: do you have a extensible game plan for managing new media sourcing? If all of this comes off as unbelievable to you, that's because it is! The metrics for content are more well-understood if they are not distributed. Without development, you will lack Total Quality Control. We will streamline the term "scalable".