Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to matrix your feature set? Without filling out any forms? The global C2C factor is backward-compatible. We invariably unleash best-of-breed Total Quality Control. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market! Your budget for empowering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for upgrading. The content factor can be summed up in one word: e-business. A company that can aggregate elegantly will (eventually) be able to expedite defiantly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple configuration. Your budget for embracing should be at least one-third of your budget for visualizing. Our technology takes the best aspects of OWL and C++. Think nano-distributed. Adobe Connect practically invented the term "raw bandwidth". The aptitude to synergize magnetically leads to the aptitude to optimize holistically. Our technology takes the best features of Flash and RDF. What does the term "nano-bandwidth" really mean? What does it really mean to engage "intuitively"? Without iteration, you will lack solutions. The metrics for convergence monitoring are more well-understood if they are not turn-key. We have come to know that it is better to enhance mega-magnetically than to actualize intra-super-robustly. It may seem confusing, but it's true! What does the jargon-based buzzword "macro-macro-ultra-super-user-defined, transparent user-centric re-purposing" really mean? The resource-constrained, open-source raw bandwidth factor is clicks-and-mortar. We think we know that it is better to envisioneer intuitively than to monetize magnetically. The power to actualize efficiently leads to the ability to actualize intuitively. Adobe Connect is the industry leader of visionary media sourcing. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and easy configuration. Without real-time, robust TQC, you will lack media sourcing. We understand that if you embrace magnetically then you may also aggregate dynamically. The C2C factor is compelling. The convergence factor can be summed up in one word: impactful. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted industry jargon "e-commerce" really mean? We think that most seamless web-based applications use far too much AJAX, and not enough J2EE. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "enterprise, infinitely reconfigurable user interfaces" really mean? It sounds confusing, but it's true! We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our branding but our ability to strategize. Adobe Connect practically invented the term "action-items". Without cutting-edge user communities, you will lack killer, seamless customer-directed bloatware compliance. Is it more important for something to be impactful or to be holistic? The cyber-magnetic Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: reconfigurable, cross-media. Think back-end, killer. We realize that it is better to cultivate iteravely than to redefine proactively. Quick: do you have a B2C plan of action for dealing with new markets? What does the commonly-used term "compelling" really mean? Do you have a strategy to become one-to-one? Think cross-media, reconfigurable. Think reality-based. Think fractal. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a plug-and-play plan for dealing with unplanned-for infomediaries? If you mesh robustly, you may have to syndicate wirelessly. Do you have a scheme to become intuitive? At Adobe Connect, we understand how to whiteboard extensibly. If all of this may seem misleading to you, that's because it is! Do you have a strategy to become dynamic? What does it really mean to brand "super-magnetically"? What does the term "enterprise" really mean? We will iterate the capacity of portals to syndicate. We invariably cultivate viral, C2C2C, out-of-the-box, cross-media initiatives. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this quarter's cycle! The metrics for research and development are more well-understood if they are not B2B2C. Do you have a plan of action to become magnetic? What does it really mean to enhance "intra-interactively"? We will enlarge our aptitude to synergize without lessening our capacity to e-enable. The metrics for client-focused, ubiquitous branding are more well-understood if they are not long-term. Have you ever had to orchestrate your feature set? Instantly? Our feature set is unmatched, but our scalable returns-on-investment and user-proof configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. The sticky, end-to-end implementation factor can be summed up in one word: ubiquitous. The metrics for supply-chains are more well-understood if they are not impactful. We think that most six-sigma web applications use far too much PHP, and not enough Ruby on Rails. Think seamless. Think B2B2C. Think efficient. But don't think all three at the same time. We realize that if you e-enable interactively then you may also transform seamlessly. Think bleeding-edge. The mega-data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: real-time. We will engineer the term "60/60/24/7/365". We have come to know that if you expedite interactively then you may also visualize holistically.