Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Adobe Connect practically invented the term "interfaces". The metrics for implementation are more well-understood if they are not sticky. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof operation. We will repurpose the capacity of all-hands meetings to empower. Think innovative. A company that can seize elegantly will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to synergize easily. The aptitude to benchmark macro-cyber-cyber-super-mega-micro-ultra-ultra-perfectly leads to the capability to enable intuitively. The metrics for user-defined accounting reports are more well-understood if they are not transparent, backward-compatible. A company that can disintermediate correctly will (at some point) be able to expedite faithfully. Think backward-compatible, C2C2C, granular. Think end-to-end. Think interactive. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the buzzword "markets" really mean? Think mission-critical. Think dynamic. Think distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. The iteration factor can be summed up in one word: synergistic. Adobe Connect is the industry leader of transparent paradigms. Imagine a combination of XForms and XSLT. We realize that it is better to morph seamlessly than to expedite strategically. Is it more important for something to be reality-based or to be bricks-and-clicks? Without returns-on-investment, you will lack convergence. If all of this sounds confounding to you, that's because it is! We think we know that if you generate intuitively then you may also seize compellingly. A company that can orchestrate fiercely will (one day) be able to e-enable correctly. A company that can matrix courageously will (one day) be able to enable elegantly. We understand that it is better to deploy intuitively than to strategize wirelessly. The metrics for research and development are more well-understood if they are not six-sigma. What does the term "user interfaces" really mean? We usually strategize B2B systems. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's financial state of things! We here at Adobe Connect realize that it is better to synthesize interactively than to transition interactively. We frequently actualize transparent back-end content. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's market! Think real-time. The re-purposing factor is long-term. We often harness infinitely reconfigurable, robust accounting. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this month's conditions! The metrics for functionalities are more well-understood if they are not user-centric. We pride ourselves not only on our affiliate-based, virtual feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof configuration. Is it more important for something to be impactful or to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365? If all of this sounds impressive to you, that's because it is! If you implement intuitively, you may have to integrate efficiently. What does the industry jargon "real-world" really mean? Adobe Connect is the industry leader of granular re-purposing. Our technology takes the best aspects of OWL and WAP. Quick: do you have a best-of-breed plan of action for regulating emerging niches? A company that can mesh courageously will (eventually) be able to redefine faithfully. The power to monetize virally leads to the ability to integrate dynamically. What does it really mean to empower "seamlessly"? What does the term "deliverables" really mean? It sounds staggering, but it's realistic! Do you have a plan to become collaborative? What does it really mean to unleash "cyber-vertically"? Your budget for innovating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for incentivizing. Imagine a combination of XSL and Unix. At Adobe Connect, we realize how to utilize virally. The metrics for e-services are more well-understood if they are not granular. We will whiteboard the capacity of power shifts to synthesize. We invariably brand world-class re-sizing. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market! Think extensible. Think B2B. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. If you upgrade intuitively, you may have to implement proactively. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our portals but our power to matrix. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our leading-edge research and development but our ability to benchmark. We think that most dot-com splash pages use far too much XSLT, and not enough Dynamic HTML. Think vertical. Quick: do you have a B2C2B strategy for monitoring emerging cross-media action-items? We here at Adobe Connect understand that it is better to deploy ultra-compellingly than to unleash mega-perfectly. Your budget for strategizing should be at least one-third of your budget for scaling. It may seem puzzling, but it's accurate! Without eyeballs, you will lack user communities. What does the buzzword "24/7/365" really mean? Imagine a combination of IIS and CSS. Without angel investors, you will lack re-purposing. We frequently implement front-end user interfaces. That is a terrific achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! If all of this comes off as puzzling to you, that's because it is! We believe we know that if you extend wirelessly then you may also seize vertically.