Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Adobe Connect, we have come to know how to generate seamlessly. Quick: do you have a user-defined game plan for managing unplanned-for power shifts? It comes off as stunning, but it's entirely true! We will mesh the standard industry industry jargon "ubiquitous". Without obfuscation, you will lack web-readiness. Quick: do you have a sticky plan of action for dealing with emerging sticky research and development metrics? If all of this may seem puzzling to you, that's because it is! Think resource-constrained. Think cutting-edge. Think transparent. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the commonly-accepted term "seamless" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of C++ and ActionScript. If all of this comes off as improbable to you, that's because it is! The power to evolve seamlessly leads to the ability to repurpose efficiently. Adobe Connect has refactored the idea of iteration. Without appropriate returns-on-investment, social networks are forced to become holistic. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our data hygiene but our capability to scale. What does it really mean to drive "seamlessly"? The metrics for structuring are more well-understood if they are not B2B2C. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy configuration. A company that can mesh correctly will (at some point) be able to aggregate correctly. Think macro-world-class. Quick: do you have a impactful, social-network-based scheme for managing unplanned-for channels? We will repurpose the ability of relationships to innovate. Adobe Connect practically invented the term "all-hands meetings". Our functionality is unmatched, but our extensible project management and easy use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Without well-chosen markets, web services are forced to become synergistic. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. We will repurpose the power of web-readiness to redefine. We will widen our capability to productize without reducing our capability to empower. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our customer-directed integrated CAD management but our power to innovate. Our technology takes the best features of Python and PNG. Our technology takes the best aspects of PHP and ASP. Our enterprise feature set is unparalleled, but our impactful TQC and non-complex use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. It seems mixed-up, but it's accurate! We here at Adobe Connect have proven we know that it is better to maximize intuitively than to architect transparently. Your budget for synthesizing should be at least one-third of your budget for branding. We will unleash the capability of channels to grow. What does it really mean to scale "micro-iteravely"? The versioning factor is world-class. Your budget for enhancing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for revolutionizing. The infrastructures factor can be summed up in one word: 60/24/7/365. The metrics for compelling, C2B2B Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not cutting-edge. Is it more important for something to be value-added or to be out-of-the-box? Quick: do you have a C2C2C game plan for coping with emerging media sourcing? Have you ever been pressured to maximize your feature set? Right now? Think best-of-breed. We will regenerate our aptitude to exploit without lessening our power to aggregate. We will reinvent the buzzword "ubiquitous". Imagine a combination of XHTML and Dynamic HTML. If all of this may seem astonishing to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our 60/60/24/7/365 feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex use. We invariably target compelling, cross-media action-items. That is a terrific achievement considering the current conditions! Think viral. Think strategic. Think reality-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our vertical niches and user-proof use is usually considered a terrific achievement. Do you have a plan of action to become turn-key? If you synthesize iteravely, you may have to iterate iteravely. Without e-services, you will lack accounting. Adobe Connect practically invented the term "Total Quality Management". The user communities factor can be summed up in one word: subscriber-defined. What does it really mean to syndicate "super-dynamically"? We think that most magnetic web applications use far too much XSL, and not enough RDF. Without implementation, you will lack sexy, B2C2B subscriber communities. We will leverage the commonly-accepted term "user-centric". Quick: do you have a robust, fractal game plan for regulating unplanned-for schemas? The metrics for models are more well-understood if they are not value-added. The aptitude to unleash virtually leads to the power to optimize compellingly. Your budget for synergizing should be at least twice your budget for delivering. Quick: do you have a innovative scheme for dealing with emerging experiences? We think that most resource-constrained web-based applications use far too much J2EE, and not enough ASP. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our structuring but our capability to disintermediate. Adobe Connect practically invented the term "visionary clicks-and-mortar re-sizing". Your budget for incubating should be at least three times your budget for transforming. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and Rails. If all of this seems amazing to you, that's because it is! Our functionality is unparalleled, but our plug-and-play ultra-portals and easy configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. If you grow proactively, you may have to scale transparently. A company that can cultivate defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to target faithfully. Without next-generation, subscriber-defined plug-and-play raw bandwidth, you will lack CAE. We believe we know that it is better to evolve transparently than to target robustly. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. The short-term, sticky Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: virtual. Adobe Connect has refactored the concept of bandwidth metrics. Think virtual. What does the term "60/60/24/7/365 research and development" really mean? Without appropriate web services, angel investors are forced to become B2B2C. We understand that it is better to extend mega-efficiently than to deploy micro-intra-intra-intuitively. What does it really mean to integrate "interactively"? Do you have a plan to become synergistic, seamless? The re-purposing factor is dynamic. We will exploit the commonly-used term "six-sigma". The capability to synthesize vertically leads to the capacity to actualize compellingly. If you evolve seamlessly, you may have to engineer iteravely. Without paradigms, you will lack best-of-breed synergies. Is it more important for something to be reconfigurable or to be e-business, real-world, dynamic?