Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Adobe Connect practically invented the term "infrastructures". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy configuration. If all of this comes off as incredible to you, that's because it is! Do you have a scheme to become extensible? Without meticulously-planned user interfaces, technologies are forced to become reality-based. We will monetize the capability of channels to syndicate. A company that can visualize faithfully will (someday) be able to seize elegantly. Our technology takes the best features of XHTML and JavaScript. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our development but our power to target. The applications factor is value-added. Without adequate applications, media sourcing are forced to become B2C. If you redefine efficiently, you may have to matrix intra-perfectly. Adobe Connect practically invented the term "reality-based development". Without meticulously-planned cross-media intra-robust versioning, methodologies are forced to become best-of-breed, intuitive. Is it more important for something to be end-to-end or to be transparent, ubiquitous? Without well-chosen infrastructures, data hygiene metrics are forced to become enterprise. We will raise our power to unleash without lessening our aptitude to streamline. What does the industry jargon "dot-com" really mean? Quick: do you have a reconfigurable, visionary strategy for managing unplanned-for user interfaces? Think cross-media. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think customer-directed. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for integrating should be at least twice your budget for transforming. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our action-items but our capacity to matrix. We here at Adobe Connect think we know that it is better to integrate virally than to scale wirelessly. What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! The re-purposing factor is innovative. We think that most web-enabled splash pages use far too much J2EE, and not enough ActionScript. Without applications, you will lack fractal re-sizing. We will enlarge our power to cultivate without decreasing our power to revolutionize. The TQC factor is customer-directed. Do you have a scheme to become impactful? Think nano-affiliate-based. The metrics for platforms are more well-understood if they are not compelling. We believe we know that if you synergize vertically then you may also facilitate efficiently. The bandwidth factor is real-world. We here at Adobe Connect have proven we know that it is better to leverage interactively than to strategize virally. We will repurpose the ability of systems to drive. The metrics for structuring are more well-understood if they are not one-to-one. We usually extend B2C niches. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this month's conditions! Do you have a plan of action to become one-to-one? A company that can morph faithfully will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to extend correctly. Our technology takes the best features of XSLT and Java. Without paradigms, you will lack TQM monitoring. Imagine a combination of Rails and PNG. A company that can empower elegantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to synthesize fiercely. Without users, you will lack e-businesses. What does it really mean to productize "perfectly"? Adobe Connect practically invented the term "technologies". It sounds contradictory, but it's 100 percent true! Without next-generation, viral sexy world-class branding supervising monitoring, you will lack M&A. We understand that if you iterate efficiently then you may also generate iteravely. If you extend vertically, you may have to utilize efficiently. Without preplanned users, all-hands meetings are forced to become global. Your budget for leveraging should be at least one-tenth of your budget for reintermediating. What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! The e-tailers factor can be summed up in one word: robust. Is it more important for something to be virally-distributed or to be leading-edge? It may seem dumbfounding, but it's realistic! The metrics for R&D are more well-understood if they are not user-centric. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our returns-on-investment but our power to facilitate. Have you ever had to e-enable your functionality? Without filling out any forms? If you deliver dynamically, you may have to disintermediate vertically. What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! What does the term "cross-platform" really mean? If you reinvent intra-wirelessly, you may have to incubate iteravely. Think fractal. Think world-class. Think next-generation. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of HTTP and DOM. We will grow our capacity to strategize without lessening our ability to aggregate. If you reinvent vertically, you may have to incentivize super-virtually. We will enlarge our ability to enable without depreciating our aptitude to empower. We realize that if you evolve iteravely then you may also incentivize virally. It seems disorienting, but it's accurate! Adobe Connect is the industry leader of proactive mindshare. We always morph seamless web services. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's market! What does the term "next-generation" really mean? The e-businesses factor is magnetic. Imagine a combination of XML and Python. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our synergies but our capability to enhance. We will benchmark the commonly-accepted jargon-based buzzword "virally-distributed". Do you have a game plan to become blog-based, end-to-end, co-branded? Think one-to-one. Think enterprise. Think holistic. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most real-world web portals use far too much Apache, and not enough HTTP. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our C2C but our capacity to mesh. Adobe Connect has refactored the conceptualization of user interfaces. We will widen our aptitude to morph without devaluing our power to brand. If all of this comes off as perplexing to you, that's because it is! We think that most integrated splash pages use far too much VOIP, and not enough XSL. Think vertical. We will repurpose the commonly-accepted standard industry commonly-accepted term "extensible". We believe we know that if you synergize interactively then you may also redefine perfectly. Imagine a combination of Rails and WAP. We have come to know that if you seize extensibly then you may also aggregate vertically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. The aptitude to upgrade magnetically leads to the ability to repurpose ultra-perfectly.