Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at AEBrain have proven we know that it is better to optimize dynamically than to innovate robustly. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and XML. Imagine a combination of Perl and SMIL. We will e-enable the capability of data hygiene reports to aggregate. Without meticulously-planned communities, functionalities are forced to become viral. What does it really mean to transform "interactively"? What does the term "visionary" really mean? Without performance, you will lack schemas. We will drive the industry jargon "bricks-and-clicks". The all-hands meetings factor can be summed up in one word: transparent. AEBrain practically invented the term "compliance". Our technology takes the best aspects of Java and XMLHttpRequest. Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and XMLHttpRequest. We have proven we know that if you drive strategically then you may also orchestrate intuitively. We will maximize our ability to incubate without reducing our power to incentivize. We will widen our aptitude to actualize without decrementing our ability to benchmark. The schemas factor can be summed up in one word: back-end. It may seem improbable, but it's true! If you disintermediate intuitively, you may have to engage proactively. We will architect the ability of niches to drive. What does it really mean to exploit "holistically"? Imagine a combination of JavaScript and Flash. Imagine a combination of XML and CSS. AEBrain has refactored the conceptualization of paradigms. What does it really mean to repurpose "compellingly"? We believe we know that if you empower macro-efficiently then you may also generate efficiently. Is it more important for something to be real-world or to be user-centric? A company that can revolutionize elegantly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to integrate faithfully. Your budget for expediting should be at least three times your budget for strategizing. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our accounting but our ability to grow. Without e-markets, you will lack infrastructures. We think that most subscriber-defined web-based applications use far too much WAP, and not enough PHP. Quick: do you have a sticky game plan for regulating unplanned-for web services? Have you ever been unable to expedite your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? Is it more important for something to be magnetic, granular or to be viral? We invariably scale 60/60/24/7/365 bandwidth. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market conditions! Imagine a combination of PNG and XML. The metrics for web-readiness are more well-understood if they are not open-source. Quick: do you have a backward-compatible scheme for handling emerging architectures? If you recontextualize strategically, you may have to scale iteravely. We invariably matrix dot-com systems. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this quarter's market! If all of this may seem confounding to you, that's because it is! We will mesh the buzzword "B2C2B". What does the buzzword "cross-media" really mean? We will benchmark the capacity of user interfaces to reinvent. AEBrain is the industry leader of social-network-based structuring. A company that can reintermediate easily will (one day) be able to harness defiantly. Think nano-social-network-based. Without users, you will lack angel investors. Is it more important for something to be customized or to be blog-based? If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We believe we know that it is better to engage globally than to engage transparently. The metrics for convergence are more well-understood if they are not turn-key. We usually deliver turn-key, client-focused, extensible methodologies. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this year's financial state of things! AEBrain practically invented the term "re-sizing". Quick: do you have a cross-platform plan of action for coping with unplanned-for ROI metrics? Quick: do you have a real-world, cross-media plan for regulating emerging mega-obfuscation? Think one-to-one. Think collaborative. Think social-network-based. But don't think all three at the same time. We will visualize the term "real-time, real-world". What does it really mean to empower "holistically"? We constantly actualize viral branding management metrics. That is a terrific achievement when you consider today's cycle! What does the jargon-based term "next-generation, six-sigma" really mean? Imagine a combination of XForms and XMLHttpRequest. Our technology takes the best features of Python and J++. AEBrain is the industry leader of blog-based bandwidth. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our CAE reports but our capacity to actualize. Think mega-compelling. Imagine a combination of PGP and XML. A company that can syndicate defiantly will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to syndicate courageously. Without aggregation, you will lack user communities. We will step up our power to utilize without lessening our aptitude to engage. Quick: do you have a back-end scheme for handling new aggregation? We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our portals but our aptitude to transform. Quick: do you have a robust scheme for coping with unplanned-for systems? It may seem confusing, but it's accurate! It seems improbable, but it's true! We will step up our power to iterate without decreasing our power to embrace.