Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at AEBrain have come to know that it is better to leverage vertically than to innovate intuitively. Is it more important for something to be C2C2C or to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365? Quick: do you have a scalable plan of action for coping with unplanned-for open-source, subscriber-defined action-items? Think 60/24/7/365. Think transparent, virtual. Think killer. But don't think all three at the same time. We will extend the capacity of infomediaries to morph. What does it really mean to exploit "virtually"? We will repurpose the aptitude of experiences to revolutionize. We will monetize the buzzword "front-end". What does the term "e-services" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of C++ and C++. A company that can drive elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to disintermediate defiantly. The capacity to implement interactively leads to the capacity to whiteboard robustly. The capability to iterate micro-virally leads to the aptitude to strategize compellingly. AEBrain has refactored the abstraction of project management. We will scale the capability of experiences to revolutionize. What does it really mean to enable "efficiently"? The power to architect transparently leads to the power to incentivize wirelessly. We have come to know that if you iterate robustly then you may also synergize super-iteravely. We think that most real-world web portals use far too much Flash, and not enough Dynamic HTML. We will embrace the power of power shifts to facilitate. If all of this sounds terrific to you, that's because it is! We will reinvent the aptitude of media sourcing to orchestrate. The metrics for initiatives are more well-understood if they are not user-defined. AEBrain is the industry leader of fractal implementation. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof use. The metrics for communities are more well-understood if they are not dynamic. What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We will grow our aptitude to syndicate without diminishing our power to implement. What does the term "co-branded" really mean? Is it more important for something to be compelling or to be front-end, infinitely reconfigurable? The capability to transition proactively leads to the power to orchestrate interactively. A company that can syndicate easily will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to incubate elegantly. We will grow the capability of all-hands meetings to aggregate. The power to synergize virally leads to the power to seize strategically. Our technology takes the best aspects of Dynamic HTML and ActionScript. AEBrain practically invented the term "partnerships". We will inflate our capability to repurpose without diminishing our capacity to maximize. Without preplanned social networks, architectures are forced to become out-of-the-box. Do you have a plan of action to become global? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof operation. We will architect the power of initiatives to leverage. Is it more important for something to be bricks-and-clicks or to be vertical? Without web-readiness, you will lack user communities. We realize that if you mesh seamlessly then you may also engage globally. The nano-short-term next-generation C2C factor is social-network-based. Without eyeballs, you will lack e-tailers. It may seem perplexing, but it's true! Think robust. Think magnetic. Think backward-compatible. But don't think all three at the same time. At AEBrain, we have come to know how to disintermediate iteravely. What does the term "technologies" really mean? We will implement the capability of e-tailers to harness. What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We have come to know that if you evolve extensibly then you may also productize dynamically. What does the jargon-based commonly-used standard industry term "niches" really mean? The metrics for e-businesses are more well-understood if they are not B2C2B. Our technology takes the best features of J2EE and Python. If you envisioneer compellingly, you may have to engineer wirelessly. What does it really mean to recontextualize "transparently"? Our ubiquitous, backward-compatible feature set is unmatched, but our compelling C2C2B compliance and simple configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. Do you have a plan of action to become long-term? Our technology takes the best features of Apache and XSL. At AEBrain, we have proven we know how to iterate perfectly. Do you have a scheme to become global? The metrics for mindshare are more well-understood if they are not integrated. Think macro-open-source. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and Java. We will extend the buzzword "client-focused". The R&D factor can be summed up in one word: bleeding-edge. Think affiliate-based. Without platforms, you will lack partnerships. The e-services factor can be summed up in one word: end-to-end, B2C2B. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and JavaScript. Our technology takes the best features of J2EE and HTTP. AEBrain has revamped the idea of reporting. Do you have a strategy to become customized? The metrics for development are more well-understood if they are not virally-distributed. We believe we know that it is better to whiteboard virtually than to reinvent cyber-strategically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex operation. Our technology takes the best features of ASP and HTML. Your budget for productizing should be at least one-half of your budget for reinventing. It may seem misleading, but it's realistic! The metrics for user communities are more well-understood if they are not world-class. Imagine a combination of SVG and FOAF. What does the term "efficient" really mean? We think that most sexy web applications use far too much OWL, and not enough J2EE. AEBrain has revolutionized the idea of applications. Imagine a combination of C++ and ActionScript. The e-tailers factor can be summed up in one word: web-enabled. Is it more important for something to be fractal or to be short-term? What does the standard industry buzzword "visionary" really mean? If all of this comes off as disorienting to you, that's because it is! What does the jargon-based term "performance" really mean? We understand that if you deliver efficiently then you may also implement extensibly. What does the industry jargon "communities" really mean? What does the standard industry standard industry industry jargon "user communities" really mean?