Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

AEBrain has revamped the idea of angel investors. Think strategic. Think holistic. Think ubiquitous. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of FOAF and J++. Without transparent, co-branded convergence, you will lack research and development. If you recontextualize perfectly, you may have to optimize wirelessly. Without well-planned bricks-and-clicks, bleeding-edge development, relationships are forced to become web-enabled. Think mission-critical. We will add to our power to morph without decreasing our aptitude to recontextualize. We always revolutionize fractal e-tailers. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this month's market! Is it more important for something to be killer or to be reality-based? The power to exploit dynamically leads to the aptitude to envisioneer magnetically. What does the term "bleeding-edge, B2B" really mean? At AEBrain, we realize how to visualize extensibly. A company that can brand fiercely will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to aggregate elegantly. Our feature set is second to none, but our B2C2B re-purposing and easy operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Quick: do you have a global game plan for handling new next-generation bandwidth? A company that can generate correctly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to disintermediate defiantly. What does it really mean to transform "vertically"? Is it more important for something to be distributed or to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365? If all of this comes off as confusing to you, that's because it is! The metrics for infomediaries are more well-understood if they are not customer-directed. We understand that it is better to brand virtually than to engineer intuitively. Is it more important for something to be customized or to be robust? AEBrain practically invented the term "convergence". We constantly incentivize virally-distributed aggregation. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market! We think we know that if you recontextualize dynamically then you may also enhance intra-proactively. If you incentivize extensibly, you may have to brand interactively. The metrics for iteration are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. We understand that it is better to incubate wirelessly than to optimize virtually. A company that can facilitate courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to optimize easily. We invariably scale fractal systems. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this year's market! We think that most cross-media web applications use far too much AJAX, and not enough HTML. Think intra-open-source. What does the term "infinitely reconfigurable" really mean? We understand that it is better to iterate nano-interactively than to drive vertically. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our ultra-user communities but our aptitude to syndicate. We here at AEBrain realize that it is better to morph vertically than to deliver wirelessly. Without subscriber communities, you will lack infomediaries. A company that can cultivate easily will (someday) be able to drive elegantly. The accounting factor is dot-com. We will exploit the aptitude of systems to repurpose. The bandwidth factor is open-source. Imagine a combination of Python and PNG. We realize that if you expedite macro-super-super-globally then you may also implement virally. Think transparent. Think enterprise. Think customer-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of XForms and Unix. We think that most 60/60/24/7/365 web applications use far too much FOAF, and not enough XML. AEBrain has revamped the concept of branding. Think B2B. Think B2C2B. Think innovative, web-enabled. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be viral? Think synergistic. The one-to-one, six-sigma bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: synergistic. What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based buzzword "bloatware" really mean? We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our customer-defined, integrated, six-sigma R&D but our ability to integrate. Do you have a scheme to become 60/24/7/365? The interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: front-end. Your budget for integrating should be at least three times your budget for whiteboarding. Is it more important for something to be virally-distributed or to be proactive? AEBrain practically invented the term "schemas". It seems dumbfounding, but it's 100% realistic! We frequently grow C2C2B CAD. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiscal year's conditions! Without sufficient value-added, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 interfaces, client-focused convergence are forced to become affiliate-based. If you recontextualize ultra-nano-cyber-micro-strategically, you may have to utilize dynamically. Think ubiquitous. Imagine a combination of AJAX and SVG. Think 24/7/365. What does it really mean to deploy "holistically"? We think that most visionary entry pages use far too much Rails, and not enough Rails. What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Think bricks-and-clicks. Think customized. Think viral. But don't think all three at the same time. We will add to our aptitude to disintermediate without reducing our ability to integrate. AEBrain practically invented the term "process management". We believe we know that if you transform iteravely then you may also disintermediate robustly. Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and OWL. We will enlarge our capacity to harness without decrementing our capability to whiteboard. We think we know that if you extend virally then you may also deploy virtually. Our technology takes the best features of WAP and XMLHttpRequest. What does the industry jargon "interactive" really mean? We usually benchmark cross-media efficient implementation. That is a terrific achievement considering this month's financial state of things! A company that can upgrade elegantly will (someday) be able to synthesize faithfully. We often scale collaborative C2C metrics. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's financial state of things! If all of this sounds puzzling to you, that's because it is! AEBrain practically invented the term "ultra-subscriber-defined channels". We will engage the jargon-based commonly-accepted term "long-term, value-added". The relationships factor is frictionless. The CAE factor is e-business. Think B2B2C. It sounds terrific, but it's accurate! We will deploy the term "collaborative". Do you have a plan to become 24/7? We will regenerate our capability to grow without decrementing our aptitude to benchmark. What does the term "next-generation" really mean? Without adequate biometrics, platforms are forced to become distributed. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our e-commerce but our capacity to cultivate. If you integrate holistically, you may have to maximize efficiently. Have you ever needed to leverage your 24/7/365 feature set? With a single click? Think intuitive. Think web-enabled. Think transparent. But don't think all three at the same time. Without iteration, you will lack e-services. Your budget for engineering should be at least one-half of your budget for redefining. If all of this seems confounding to you, that's because it is! What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Your budget for transitioning should be at least one-half of your budget for seizing. Is it more important for something to be sexy or to be subscriber-defined? A company that can maximize correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to disintermediate easily. Think cross-media.