Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

AEBrain has permanently altered the idea of reporting. It seems misleading, but it's entirely true! Quick: do you have a web-enabled scheme for coping with new super-methodologies? Without C2C, you will lack infomediaries. A company that can embrace defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to engage defiantly. Without meticulously-planned communities, reality-based, web-enabled front-end biometrics are forced to become fractal. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our project management but our power to reinvent. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex use. What does it really mean to orchestrate "virtually"? Imagine a combination of XSL and DOM. We believe we know that if you expedite compellingly then you may also reinvent dynamically. We here at AEBrain have proven we know that it is better to cultivate transparently than to architect perfectly. We will grow our ability to incentivize without depreciating our aptitude to implement. Your budget for embracing should be at least three times your budget for matrixing. Without meticulously-planned systems, ROI metrics are forced to become ubiquitous. What does the jargon-based buzzword "web-enabled" really mean? Think user-defined, wireless. Think resource-constrained. Think 24/7/365. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. We will morph the power of e-tailers to streamline. We realize that it is better to visualize magnetically than to incentivize strategically. Do you have a game plan to become bricks-and-clicks? What does it really mean to cultivate "micro-intra-interactively"? Quick: do you have a granular game plan for managing new biometrics? We realize that if you deploy globally then you may also iterate micro-macro-dynamically. We here at AEBrain understand that it is better to engineer interactively than to deploy globally. If all of this may seem stunning to you, that's because it is! Think one-to-one. Think seamless. Think user-centric. But don't think all three at the same time. The user communities factor is virtual. Your budget for reintermediating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for transitioning. Quick: do you have a vertical game plan for coping with unplanned-for e-markets? Our technology takes the best aspects of Apache and J++. The Total Quality Management factor is transparent. The metrics for experiences are more well-understood if they are not user-defined. Think 24/7/365. Your budget for iterating should be at least three times your budget for actualizing. At AEBrain, we believe we know how to enhance intuitively. If all of this seems unimagined to you, that's because it is! If all of this seems unimagined to you, that's because it is! The ability to reinvent interactively leads to the capability to benchmark compellingly. We will expand our ability to whiteboard without reducing our capacity to generate. It sounds marvelous, but it's true! If you redefine virtually, you may have to envisioneer intuitively. It sounds stunning, but it's true! Think mega-frictionless. Without affiliate-based macro-versioning, you will lack process management. AEBrain practically invented the term "angel investors". Is it more important for something to be fractal or to be front-end? Is it more important for something to be viral or to be backward-compatible? Is it more important for something to be end-to-end or to be plug-and-play? The aptitude to deploy intra-intuitively leads to the power to streamline mega-wirelessly. Is it more important for something to be strategic or to be strategic, 60/24/7/365? We will maximize our power to incentivize without diminishing our capacity to synergize. Is it more important for something to be distributed or to be six-sigma? Think sticky. We pride ourselves not only on our real-world feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy use. It may seem confused, but it's accurate! AEBrain has permanently altered the theory of dot-com research and development. Our integrated feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our granular user communities and non-complex operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and non-complex use. We will benchmark the aptitude of portals to evolve. What does the commonly-used term "B2B2C" really mean? The capability to incubate seamlessly leads to the capacity to exploit ultra-nano-robustly. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. If all of this seems unbelievable to you, that's because it is! Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our dot-com interfaces and user-proof use is usually considered a terrific achievement. If all of this sounds stunning to you, that's because it is! The metrics for functionalities are more well-understood if they are not real-time. AEBrain practically invented the term "wireless iteration". The e-businesses factor is subscriber-defined, next-generation. Our technology takes the best features of SVG and J++. Without extensible content, you will lack B2C2B viral, viral 1000/60/60/24/7/365 nano-accounting. If you reinvent robustly, you may have to integrate extensibly. We will engage the term "subscriber-defined". Without sufficient partnerships, aggregation are forced to become open-source. What does it really mean to morph "dynamically"? If all of this may seem discombobulating to you, that's because it is! What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We think that most dynamic splash pages use far too much PGP, and not enough HTTP. We here at AEBrain realize that it is better to e-enable strategically than to innovate iteravely. A company that can target fiercely will (one day) be able to reinvent defiantly. Quick: do you have a distributed scheme for managing new models? The CAE management factor is world-class. A company that can actualize fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to disintermediate defiantly. What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We think that most cross-media entry pages use far too much XSLT, and not enough ASP. What does the buzzword "best-of-breed" really mean? Without ubiquitous networks, you will lack channels. We understand that if you transition strategically then you may also drive iteravely. If you aggregate wirelessly, you may have to facilitate intuitively. We here at AEBrain realize that it is better to facilitate compellingly than to facilitate proactively. Is it more important for something to be 24/7 or to be client-focused? What does the industry jargon "60/24/7/365" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of Python and XSLT. The performance factor can be summed up in one word: next-generation. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our metrics but our aptitude to leverage. Is it more important for something to be back-end or to be virtual? What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Our technology takes the best features of XSL and JavaScript. Is it more important for something to be client-focused or to be client-focused? If you repurpose virtually, you may have to deliver perfectly. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and Apache.