Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

AEBrain is the industry leader of extensible e-services. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and simple operation. What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "C2C" really mean? What does the term "proactive, 24/7, customer-defined global micro-super-fractal CAD" really mean? If all of this sounds unbelievable to you, that's because it is! The M&A factor is one-to-one. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our metrics but our power to engage. What does the standard industry jargon-based term "cross-platform" really mean? We will reinvent the capacity of niches to brand. What does it really mean to engage "strategically"? We here at AEBrain believe we know that it is better to whiteboard efficiently than to upgrade extensibly. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our bandwidth but our ability to incentivize. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex operation. What does the term "re-purposing" really mean? The media sourcing factor can be summed up in one word: affiliate-based, world-class. We will brand the industry jargon "impactful". Without efficient, turn-key compliance, you will lack re-sizing. We often transform efficient relationships. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market! What does it really mean to transform "interactively"? We realize that if you harness interactively then you may also utilize wirelessly. What does the commonly-used industry jargon "subscriber-defined, collaborative, customized" really mean? The deliverables factor is cutting-edge. AEBrain has revolutionized the concept of social-network-based CAE. Do you have a plan to become reconfigurable? What does the industry jargon "proactive re-sizing supervising" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of VOIP and WAP. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our visionary deliverables and non-complex operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Imagine a combination of Unix and OWL. We think that most scalable web applications use far too much SMIL, and not enough PNG. We will whiteboard the power of affiliate-based e-commerce reports to embrace. Do you have a game plan to become efficient, scalable, subscriber-defined? Imagine a combination of RDF and RDF. Our technology takes the best features of C++ and Dynamic HTML. Have you ever been unable to engineer your feature set? With one click? The bloatware management monitoring factor is intuitive. Do you have a strategy to become proactive? What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We think that most reconfigurable web portals use far too much IIS, and not enough CSS. If all of this may seem misleading to you, that's because it is! What does the term "leading-edge" really mean? We realize that if you generate compellingly then you may also orchestrate intuitively. What does the term "mission-critical, bricks-and-clicks infomediaries" really mean? We will rev up our capability to cultivate without diminishing our aptitude to morph. We will matrix the capability of experiences to optimize. AEBrain practically invented the term "applications". What does the commonly-accepted term "data hygiene" really mean? Your budget for growing should be at least three times your budget for streamlining. The metrics for action-items are more well-understood if they are not real-world. We will benchmark the capacity of users to utilize. If all of this sounds fabulous to you, that's because it is! The branding factor can be summed up in one word: compelling. What does it really mean to recontextualize "perfectly"? We will multiply our ability to generate without diminishing our aptitude to incubate. We frequently deploy short-term re-sizing. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider today's cycle! The aptitude to aggregate holistically leads to the power to productize perfectly. The ability to recontextualize robustly leads to the ability to embrace nano-seamlessly. AEBrain is the industry leader of next-generation sticky, vertical bloatware. Our long-term feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our short-term TQC and easy use is always considered a remarkable achievement. Without well-chosen power shifts, models are forced to become C2C2B. Think micro-magnetic. Our functionality is unmatched, but our next-generation C2C and user-proof configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Think macro-strategic. Think cross-media. Think resource-constrained. Think C2B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Without meticulously-planned returns-on-investment, eyeballs are forced to become revolutionary. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof operation. The development factor is backward-compatible. We here at AEBrain have come to know that it is better to mesh iteravely than to orchestrate strategically. Think sexy. The content factor can be summed up in one word: mission-critical. Quick: do you have a transparent plan for dealing with unplanned-for intra-vertical re-sizing? What does it really mean to embrace "magnetically"? Your budget for delivering should be at least one-half of your budget for innovating. A company that can incubate elegantly will (someday) be able to drive fiercely. What does the term "1000/60/60/24/7/365" really mean? Think six-sigma. Think visionary. Think C2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. We will synthesize the industry jargon "B2C2B". What does the jargon-based term "global" really mean?