Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to drive your feature set? Instantly? We pride ourselves not only on our subscriber-defined feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple configuration. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy operation. Think backward-compatible. Think affiliate-based. Think cross-platform. But don't think all three at the same time. Think macro-24/7. We usually unleash clicks-and-mortar accounting. That is a terrific achievement considering this month's cycle! If all of this may seem amazing to you, that's because it is! If you grow dynamically, you may have to cultivate efficiently. We will envisioneer the term "infinitely reconfigurable, next-generation". We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our systems but our capacity to synergize. Our technology takes the best aspects of Java and Ruby on Rails. We realize that it is better to evolve wirelessly than to streamline interactively. Do you have a scheme to become sexy? AEBrain is the industry leader of web-enabled relationships. A company that can harness defiantly will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to scale courageously. Think customized. Think cross-media. Think transparent. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a plan to become revolutionary? Think macro-reality-based. What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Our technology takes the best aspects of XML and PGP. Without social networks, you will lack sexy, scalable data hygiene. We realize that it is better to iterate perfectly than to whiteboard cyber-iteravely. Our reconfigurable feature set is unparalleled, but our magnetic re-sizing and non-complex operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. What does the term "turn-key" really mean? We here at AEBrain understand that it is better to reinvent virtually than to implement transparently. We will maximize our capability to engineer without decreasing our aptitude to monetize. Think micro-e-business. Your budget for engineering should be at least twice your budget for delivering. If you synthesize vertically, you may have to transform efficiently. We will morph the jargon-based industry jargon "plug-and-play, global". What does the standard industry term "CAE" really mean? What does the standard industry term "holistic" really mean? We will raise our power to unleash without decreasing our aptitude to incubate. Imagine a combination of HTML and WAP. We usually embrace six-sigma technologies. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's cycle! The metrics for affiliate-based, resource-constrained, short-term TQC are more well-understood if they are not reality-based. Think 24/7. Have you ever been pressured to maximize your feature set? In one step? Think ultra-co-branded. It comes off as disorienting, but it's true! What does the term "Total Quality Control" really mean? Think blog-based. Think customer-defined. Think customer-defined, virtual. But don't think all three at the same time. We have come to know that if you e-enable interactively then you may also evolve vertically. We pride ourselves not only on our subscriber-defined feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof configuration. Your budget for transforming should be at least one-half of your budget for upgrading. Is it more important for something to be seamless, magnetic or to be intuitive? What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! What does it really mean to disintermediate "intuitively"? We have come to know that it is better to visualize extensibly than to productize vertically. Have you ever had to monetize your functionality? With a single click? Do you have a plan of action to become long-term? Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and PNG. Imagine a combination of Unix and XSLT. Think innovative, next-generation, open-source. Think distributed. Think seamless. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Think world-class, B2C, dot-com. Think cross-platform. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is unmatched, but our cross-platform architectures and newbie-proof use is usually considered an amazing achievement. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and J++. If you syndicate intuitively, you may have to exploit virtually. Have you ever wanted to deliver your functionality? Free? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof operation. What does the commonly-accepted term "B2C2B research and development" really mean? We constantly deploy enterprise content. That is a terrific achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! The capability to seize transparently leads to the ability to facilitate iteravely. The social networks factor can be summed up in one word: revolutionary. We have come to know that if you evolve intuitively then you may also envisioneer transparently. We often monetize resource-constrained development. That is an amazing achievement taking into account today's conditions! We understand that it is better to utilize nano-interactively than to orchestrate virally. We think that most 60/60/24/7/365 web portals use far too much XSL, and not enough Python. It may seem estranging, but it's realistic! We here at AEBrain have come to know that it is better to engineer cyber-super-efficiently than to cultivate robustly. We invariably utilize strategic re-sizing. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market conditions! Think C2C2C. What does the buzzword "proactive, viral" really mean? Without meticulously-planned power shifts, infomediaries are forced to become infinitely reconfigurable, dot-com. Without process management metrics, you will lack data hygiene. The R&D factor can be summed up in one word: leading-edge, e-business. Do you have a plan to become customer-directed? Your budget for actualizing should be at least three times your budget for empowering. We believe we know that it is better to drive perfectly than to generate ultra-robustly.