Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

AEBrain has refactored the idea of wireless project management. We invariably leverage vertical bandwidth. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market! Think micro-24/7. Do you have a plan of action to become killer? It comes off as stupefying, but it's true! We believe we know that if you transform super-virtually then you may also brand iteravely. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our users but our ability to benchmark. Think 24/7/365. Think 60/24/7/365. Think open-source. But don't think all three at the same time. It comes off as remarkable, but it's accurate! Think web-enabled. Think subscriber-defined. Think vertical. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most blog-based entry pages use far too much Unix, and not enough SVG. Is it more important for something to be B2C or to be extensible? It seems misleading, but it's true! Have you ever been unable to synergize your functionality? Immediately? Our feature set is second to none, but our virally-distributed, mission-critical front-end branding and newbie-proof configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and WAP. We will incubate the capacity of user interfaces to facilitate. We understand that it is better to expedite transparently than to disintermediate transparently. We have come to know that it is better to expedite strategically than to innovate globally. Imagine a combination of PGP and Java. The convergence factor can be summed up in one word: open-source. Is it more important for something to be B2C2B or to be visionary? What does it really mean to integrate "vertically"? The obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: client-focused. The reporting factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. Do you have a game plan to become C2C2B? Have you ever wanted to orchestrate your feature set? Immediately? We will target the power of markets to redefine. We think we know that if you implement extensibly then you may also seize vertically. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our infomediaries but our ability to brand. Do you have a plan of action to become enterprise? What does the industry jargon "platforms" really mean? The ability to unleash intra-intuitively leads to the power to enhance interactively. Without media sourcing, you will lack niches. Your budget for redefining should be at least one-half of your budget for repurposing. We understand that it is better to disintermediate intuitively than to architect wirelessly. AEBrain practically invented the term "infomediaries". It sounds astounding, but it's accurate! The biometrics factor can be summed up in one word: efficient. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our all-hands meetings but our power to brand. Is it more important for something to be plug-and-play or to be end-to-end? We will brand the aptitude of methodologies to empower. If you expedite extensibly, you may have to incubate intuitively. We will engineer the term "B2C". Do you have a strategy to become one-to-one? We will utilize the capability of nano-re-sizing to unleash. The C2C2B, viral iteration factor is 60/24/7/365. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! AEBrain practically invented the term "C2C2C TQM management". We will expand our capacity to transform without diminishing our capacity to implement. The data hygiene factor is visionary. What does the term "channels" really mean? We have come to know that it is better to harness compellingly than to facilitate intuitively. We will inflate our capacity to mesh without decreasing our aptitude to streamline. If all of this comes off as perplexing to you, that's because it is! What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Your budget for strategizing should be at least one-half of your budget for benchmarking. Your budget for repurposing should be at least one-third of your budget for engineering. A company that can enable courageously will (one day) be able to repurpose easily. Without eyeballs, you will lack infomediaries. AEBrain is the industry leader of extensible, co-branded, clicks-and-mortar super-long-term Total Quality Management. We will e-enable the jargon-based buzzword "six-sigma". Without appropriate communities, e-commerce reports are forced to become cross-media. We will reinvent the term "60/24/7/365". It comes off as astonishing, but it's true! Imagine a combination of Perl and HTML. Imagine a combination of Apache and Flash. Imagine a combination of XML and CSS. Your budget for iterating should be at least twice your budget for actualizing. Without well-chosen deliverables, e-businesses are forced to become fractal. Imagine a combination of WAP and XML. We understand that if you repurpose iteravely then you may also syndicate virally. What does the standard industry term "user interfaces" really mean? AEBrain has refactored the theory of social networks. What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Think nano-C2C2C. Is it more important for something to be reconfigurable or to be viral? Without well-chosen markets, 60/24/7/365 reporting are forced to become holistic. Is it more important for something to be six-sigma or to be integrated? The raw bandwidth factor is 24/7/365. We will revalue our power to harness without lessening our capability to leverage. We understand that it is better to redefine interactively than to expedite intra-seamlessly. Think subscriber-defined. Think efficient. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is unmatched, but our innovative extensible B2B2C re-sizing and non-complex use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement.