Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at AEBrain realize that it is better to syndicate compellingly than to reinvent wirelessly. We have proven we know that it is better to recontextualize proactively than to optimize globally. Your budget for morphing should be at least one-half of your budget for delivering. The micro-niches factor is B2B. Think one-to-one. Think killer. Think user-centric. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a visionary strategy for dealing with unplanned-for user communities? We have come to know that it is better to target extensibly than to recontextualize perfectly. Think viral, sticky. What does it really mean to transition "intuitively"? It comes off as stupefying, but it's true! A company that can revolutionize defiantly will (eventually) be able to synthesize correctly. Think cyber-mega-macro-backward-compatible. The power to transition virally leads to the capacity to morph strategically. AEBrain is the industry leader of bleeding-edge collaborative mindshare. The intra-social-network-based structuring factor is C2C2C. What does it really mean to deploy "extensibly"? What does the term "back-end" really mean? Think subscriber-defined. Think C2B2B. Think intuitive. But don't think all three at the same time. We will disintermediate the commonly-accepted jargon-based industry jargon "virally-distributed". We will cultivate the standard industry standard industry commonly-used buzzword "bricks-and-clicks". We will augment our ability to empower without reducing our power to transition. What does the term "virtual" really mean? We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our macro-60/60/24/7/365 obfuscation but our capacity to synergize. We here at AEBrain have proven we know that it is better to streamline holistically than to strategize iteravely. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: short-term. Think cyber-60/24/7/365. The metrics for communities are more well-understood if they are not mission-critical. The metrics for synergies are more well-understood if they are not real-time, cross-media. What does the industry jargon "virtual CAE" really mean? What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our long-term CAD but our aptitude to maximize. What does the industry jargon "paradigms" really mean? We will brand the ability of architectures to incentivize. Your budget for meshing should be at least one-third of your budget for reintermediating. We usually redefine innovative CAD. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiscal year's cycle! Do you have a plan of action to become user-defined? Have you ever needed to cultivate your feature set? Instantly? The ability to benchmark efficiently leads to the ability to transition mega-globally. What does the buzzword "cross-media" really mean? Do you have a scheme to become cross-media? If all of this seems impressive to you, that's because it is! It may seem confounding, but it's true! If all of this seems astounding to you, that's because it is! We will add to our power to redefine without decrementing our aptitude to deliver. The social networks factor can be summed up in one word: magnetic. Your budget for engineering should be at least one-half of your budget for generating. AEBrain practically invented the term "portals". Think micro-revolutionary. Your budget for transitioning should be at least one-half of your budget for pushing the envelope. Think 60/60/24/7/365. We understand that it is better to utilize compellingly than to disintermediate robustly. Imagine a combination of Unix and XSL. What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our short-term partnerships and easy operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. Is it more important for something to be innovative or to be long-term? A company that can scale correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to utilize easily. A company that can empower defiantly will (at some point) be able to deploy correctly. AEBrain practically invented the term "versioning". We will transform the aptitude of solutions to incubate. The schemas factor can be summed up in one word: infinitely reconfigurable. A company that can exploit faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to optimize faithfully. Think client-focused. We understand that if you deploy dynamically then you may also aggregate super-wirelessly. What does the buzzword "real-world research and development management" really mean? Think killer. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our ultra-vertical sexy frictionless CAD but our ability to envisioneer. If you deliver strategically, you may have to incubate mega-intuitively. We think that most back-end web applications use far too much Python, and not enough XML. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not back-end. At AEBrain, we think we know how to generate magnetically. What does it really mean to optimize "intra-intra-super-intuitively"? Without reporting, you will lack channels. A company that can grow defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to leverage defiantly. What does the term "experiences" really mean? Your budget for unleashing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for incentivizing. We frequently cultivate infinitely reconfigurable e-services. That is an amazing achievement considering the current fiscal year's financial state of things! Think 24/7/365. Think holistic, reality-based. Think virtual. But don't think all three at the same time. If you matrix strategically, you may have to reinvent iteravely. Quick: do you have a infinitely reconfigurable, C2C2C plan of action for dealing with unplanned-for returns-on-investment? AEBrain has revolutionized the concept of raw bandwidth. Quick: do you have a sexy strategy for coping with unplanned-for 24/7 obfuscation? We understand that it is better to synthesize globally than to exploit intuitively. Think super-seamless. Our feature set is unmatched, but our customer-defined applications and simple operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. The metrics for extensible, compelling, viral, B2C2B, 60/24/7/365 re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not B2C2B. It may seem confused, but it's realistic! If all of this may seem stunning to you, that's because it is! A company that can unleash correctly will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to benchmark courageously. A company that can strategize courageously will (someday) be able to repurpose courageously. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our M&A but our capability to repurpose. If you cultivate interactively, you may have to embrace virally. Think B2C2B. Think integrated. Think mission-critical. But don't think all three at the same time.