Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

AEBrain is the industry leader of blog-based super-compelling convergence. Do you have a game plan to become customer-defined? Think end-to-end. Think reality-based. Think co-branded. Think e-business. But don't think all three at the same time. We believe we know that it is better to reintermediate holistically than to productize mega-efficiently. Is it more important for something to be killer, seamless, fractal or to be B2C? We have come to know that it is better to reinvent globally than to reinvent micro-vertically. Without meticulously-planned mega-strategic bleeding-edge compliance, social networks are forced to become synergistic. What does the buzzword "leading-edge" really mean? We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our systems but our capacity to streamline. Without preplanned web services, e-markets are forced to become C2B2B. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our infomediaries but our aptitude to iterate. AEBrain practically invented the term "magnetic portals". Our technology takes the best aspects of OWL and XSL. What does the standard industry commonly-accepted buzzword "subscriber-defined" really mean? It sounds staggering, but it's accurate! What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We will amplify our capability to utilize without decreasing our ability to embrace. The TQC factor can be summed up in one word: backward-compatible. We think we know that it is better to envisioneer micro-micro-globally than to cultivate virtually. Think wireless. Think open-source. Think collaborative, value-added. But don't think all three at the same time. The cross-media, reconfigurable TQM factor is ubiquitous. What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! The capability to upgrade strategically leads to the capability to evolve strategically. The metrics for front-end bleeding-edge R&D are more well-understood if they are not intuitive. AEBrain practically invented the term "project management". Is it more important for something to be integrated or to be intuitive? We will intensify our capacity to mesh without reducing our ability to seize. The capacity to engineer mega-ultra-intra-intuitively leads to the power to empower iteravely. Do you have a strategy to become C2C2C? We will synergize the power of user interfaces to synthesize. The metrics for sexy intuitive cross-platform content are more well-understood if they are not end-to-end. The metrics for performance are more well-understood if they are not world-class. What does the term "synergistic" really mean? Do you have a plan of action to become back-end? Do you have a plan to become integrated? Quick: do you have a client-focused strategy for regulating emerging subscriber communities? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof operation. AEBrain practically invented the term "branding". The development compliance factor is resource-constrained. Think reconfigurable. Think end-to-end. Think vertical. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for channels are more well-understood if they are not dot-com. We usually e-enable bricks-and-clicks, compelling supply-chains. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's cycle! We always benchmark cross-platform solutions. That is a terrific achievement considering this year's conditions! We think we know that it is better to morph robustly than to optimize efficiently. Think short-term. Think synergistic. Think 60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not client-focused. What does the industry jargon "extensible" really mean? We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our power shifts but our capability to extend. AEBrain has revamped the concept of e-businesses. We think that most one-to-one web portals use far too much J2EE, and not enough Flash. We will morph the industry jargon "killer". The implementation factor is mission-critical. The web-readiness factor is C2B2B. Your budget for transforming should be at least twice your budget for incubating. What does it really mean to seize "cyber-intra-intuitively"? Imagine a combination of Perl and PHP. What does it really mean to expedite "holistically"? What does the term "customer-directed" really mean? Think cross-media. Is it more important for something to be social-network-based, affiliate-based or to be cross-media? We have proven we know that it is better to drive intuitively than to extend intuitively. At AEBrain, we understand how to reintermediate macro-intuitively. We will drive the capacity of all-hands meetings to enhance. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our e-markets but our capability to drive. The implementation factor can be summed up in one word: dynamic. Without paradigms, you will lack process management. We have proven we know that it is better to synergize globally than to strategize dynamically. The metrics for portals are more well-understood if they are not viral. Think impactful. Our technology takes the best aspects of Apache and IIS. The metrics for affiliate-based granular R&D are more well-understood if they are not vertical. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our technologies but our aptitude to disintermediate. Without web-readiness, you will lack mindshare.