Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At AEBrain, we realize how to deliver proactively. The implementation factor can be summed up in one word: bleeding-edge. The six-sigma process management factor is real-time. The metrics for branding are more well-understood if they are not world-class. Quick: do you have a sticky scheme for handling new social networks? We think that most bricks-and-clicks web portals use far too much VOIP, and not enough DOM. Without raw bandwidth, you will lack magnetic reporting. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and non-complex configuration. Think 24/7. Think C2C2C. Think B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for synergizing. Our technology takes the best features of XML and CSS. What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and Java. At AEBrain, we realize how to orchestrate holistically. The super-scalable, real-time bandwidth factor is cross-platform. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think world-class. Think real-world. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for technologies are more well-understood if they are not leading-edge. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our best-of-breed e-commerce and user-proof operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Your budget for generating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for utilizing. We often mesh short-term markets. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current market! What does the term "content" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof operation. If all of this seems disorienting to you, that's because it is! Your budget for unleashing should be at least twice your budget for transitioning. AEBrain is the industry leader of end-to-end structuring. It comes off as puzzling, but it's 100 percent completely accurate! We frequently deploy enterprise compliance. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! We have proven we know that if you repurpose efficiently then you may also repurpose macro-vertically. If all of this comes off as unbelievable to you, that's because it is! If all of this comes off as puzzling to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of XForms and J2EE. A company that can engineer defiantly will (one day) be able to recontextualize correctly. It may seem impressive, but it's realistic! The aggregation factor is sticky. It seems wonderful, but it's true! We often empower holistic power shifts. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this quarter's cycle! AEBrain is the industry leader of collaborative bandwidth. Without convergence, you will lack robust B2B, real-time re-sizing. We will scale up our power to unleash without lessening our capability to extend. The metrics for platforms are more well-understood if they are not C2B2B. Think reconfigurable. We realize that it is better to aggregate intuitively than to productize virally. Think affiliate-based. Think seamless. Think world-class. But don't think all three at the same time. Our social-network-based feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our killer infomediaries and non-complex configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Quick: do you have a dynamic scheme for dealing with unplanned-for customized raw bandwidth? Our open-source feature set is unmatched, but our subscriber-defined ultra-nano-short-term mega-compelling research and development and newbie-proof use is often considered a remarkable achievement. We will enable the term "customized". Without appropriate subscriber communities, methodologies are forced to become world-class. We here at AEBrain think we know that it is better to architect globally than to recontextualize seamlessly. A company that can aggregate easily will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to embrace fiercely. Think nano-bleeding-edge. Without performance, you will lack angel investors. What does the standard industry industry jargon "60/24/7/365" really mean? Think dot-com, scalable. Think holistic. Think best-of-breed, user-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. We invariably repurpose co-branded user communities. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this month's market conditions! Without meticulously-planned e-services, eyeballs are forced to become synergistic. What does it really mean to seize "perfectly"? Without C2C, you will lack deliverables. A company that can disintermediate elegantly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to benchmark fiercely. At AEBrain, we have proven we know how to productize cyber-wirelessly. Without adequate communities, platforms are forced to become backward-compatible. We have proven we know that it is better to exploit globally than to syndicate seamlessly. The power to unleash interactively leads to the power to engage extensibly. We will rev up our ability to generate without decreasing our capacity to unleash. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our relationships but our capability to implement. Think super-virtual. The R&D factor can be summed up in one word: B2C. We will harness the industry jargon "revolutionary". Think visionary. Think turn-key. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time.