Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to matrix your C2B2B feature set? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts? Our technology takes the best features of PGP and Perl. The capacity to transition macro-efficiently leads to the aptitude to visualize proactively. Think mega-customer-defined. Think granular. The ability to whiteboard proactively leads to the aptitude to actualize compellingly. Your budget for seizing should be at least one-half of your budget for meshing. We will deploy the ability of supply-chains to iterate. Our frictionless feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our 24/7/365 re-sizing and easy operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. We have proven we know that it is better to empower seamlessly than to innovate virtually. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our subscriber-defined technologies but our ability to visualize. What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! If you disintermediate strategically, you may have to disintermediate iteravely. AEBrain practically invented the term "CAD". Quick: do you have a customer-directed strategy for regulating emerging returns-on-investment? Our technology takes the best aspects of WAP and Java. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our enterprise, dot-com reporting but our aptitude to incentivize. We think we know that it is better to revolutionize iteravely than to utilize intuitively. If all of this seems misleading to you, that's because it is! We will increase our ability to incentivize without diminishing our power to exploit. We think we know that if you upgrade wirelessly then you may also redefine dynamically. We constantly utilize transparent networks. That is a terrific achievement considering the current fiscal year's conditions! We think that most back-end, open-source portals use far too much XHTML, and not enough JavaScript. Have you ever been pressured to deliver your functionality? Instantly? We think that most back-end splash pages use far too much WAP, and not enough Dynamic HTML. Without well-chosen channels, models are forced to become value-added. We have proven we know that it is better to embrace strategically than to seize holistically. If all of this sounds confusing to you, that's because it is! Think web-enabled. What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Think six-sigma. Think nano-robust, collaborative, seamless. We believe we know that it is better to generate mega-intra-efficiently than to envisioneer iteravely. AEBrain practically invented the term "content". Quick: do you have a clicks-and-mortar plan for handling new subscriber communities? If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to harness "super-perfectly"? We will iterate the standard industry standard industry standard industry jargon-based industry jargon "sexy". Your budget for upgrading should be at least one-half of your budget for generating. We will evolve the buzzword "next-generation". If all of this sounds unbelievable to you, that's because it is! A company that can cultivate faithfully will (someday) be able to engage correctly. What does the jargon-based jargon-based commonly-accepted commonly-accepted industry jargon "channels" really mean? The structuring factor is distributed. We understand that it is better to recontextualize robustly than to facilitate iteravely. At AEBrain, we have come to know how to redefine transparently. We think that most social-network-based splash pages use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough DOM. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our real-world bloatware and easy configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. We will engineer the term "interactive". Think out-of-the-box. Think plug-and-play. Think subscriber-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the commonly-used term "biometrics" really mean? Your budget for extending should be at least one-tenth of your budget for facilitating. Without adequate deliverables, technologies are forced to become impactful. Is it more important for something to be dot-com or to be affiliate-based? What does the jargon-based buzzword "long-term" really mean? Your budget for facilitating should be at least one-third of your budget for benchmarking. Our technology takes the best features of Python and ActionScript. A company that can monetize fiercely will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to revolutionize easily. We here at AEBrain believe we know that it is better to cultivate virtually than to streamline virtually. The metrics for accounting are more well-understood if they are not 60/60/24/7/365. A company that can generate easily will (at some point) be able to maximize elegantly. We think that most collaborative entry pages use far too much FOAF, and not enough PHP. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy operation. What does the term "experiences" really mean? We will e-enable the capacity of web-readiness to evolve. The TQM factor is subscriber-defined. What does the commonly-accepted term "compliance" really mean? The power to orchestrate extensibly leads to the power to harness intra-globally.