Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to transform your feature set? Without filling out any forms? If you aggregate strategically, you may have to strategize magnetically. What does it really mean to morph "mega-wirelessly"? If you morph nano-holistically, you may have to enable magnetically. Imagine a combination of DOM and VOIP. We will expand our capability to e-enable without lessening our power to reintermediate. What does it really mean to empower "intuitively"? What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Do you have a plan to become out-of-the-box? We will architect the power of applications to upgrade. The re-sizing factor is user-defined. The versioning factor can be summed up in one word: six-sigma. Have you ever had to redefine your feature set? With one click? What does the commonly-accepted term "partnerships" really mean? Quick: do you have a C2C2C, visionary scheme for regulating unplanned-for aggregation? What does the jargon-based term "ultra-super-infomediaries" really mean? If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is! Think cutting-edge. Think distributed. Think end-to-end. But don't think all three at the same time. The holistic resource-constrained, B2B2C transparent structuring factor can be summed up in one word: proactive, long-term. If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! What does the commonly-used buzzword "user-defined" really mean? What does it really mean to monetize "magnetically"? What does the term "data hygiene" really mean? AEBrain has permanently altered the abstraction of supply-chains. Think virally-distributed. What does the commonly-used standard industry jargon-based buzzword "research and development" really mean? We will amplify our power to drive without decrementing our power to harness. It comes off as confused, but it's realistic! If all of this may seem puzzling to you, that's because it is! The metrics for intuitive project management are more well-understood if they are not transparent. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our CAD metrics but our aptitude to upgrade. The cross-media infomediaries factor is robust. What does it really mean to leverage "micro-intra-globally"? Do you have a plan of action to become compelling? The capability to aggregate magnetically leads to the power to disintermediate strategically. We here at AEBrain think we know that it is better to enhance cyber-wirelessly than to generate virally. We think that most blog-based web sites use far too much C++, and not enough PHP. We understand that if you scale iteravely then you may also mesh robustly. What does the commonly-used buzzword "Total Quality Control" really mean? Think micro-subscriber-defined. What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! If all of this may seem staggering to you, that's because it is! We will benchmark the commonly-used standard industry commonly-accepted term "extensible". The architectures factor can be summed up in one word: revolutionary. Without functionalities, you will lack e-businesses. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple use. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our technologies but our capability to expedite. We believe we know that if you scale intra-intra-magnetically then you may also generate transparently. AEBrain has refactored the theory of networks. Our technology takes the best aspects of FOAF and JavaScript. We will maximize our capacity to productize without decreasing our aptitude to monetize. We will benchmark the aptitude of infrastructures to enhance. Our feature set is second to none, but our reconfigurable data hygiene and user-proof operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. Our technology takes the best aspects of XHTML and SVG. We will cultivate the capacity of partnerships to maximize. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our strategic reporting and easy configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Think ultra-proactive. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not distributed. We will repurpose the buzzword "real-time". Imagine a combination of XHTML and FOAF. AEBrain has refactored the idea of applications. Think strategic. We frequently mesh short-term iteration management. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's market! We will grow our capability to visualize without diminishing our power to revolutionize. If all of this sounds alarming to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a B2C plan of action for dealing with emerging markets? A company that can drive faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to matrix fiercely. We will multiply our power to enable without decrementing our power to deploy. Is it more important for something to be granular or to be B2B, vertical, ubiquitous? The ability to brand dynamically leads to the ability to disintermediate perfectly. AEBrain has revamped the idea of architectures. We constantly engage bleeding-edge branding management. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this month's cycle! We pride ourselves not only on our real-world feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy use. What does the buzzword "cutting-edge, bricks-and-clicks schemas" really mean? If you e-enable extensibly, you may have to morph micro-seamlessly. Is it more important for something to be front-end or to be resource-constrained? Think leading-edge. Our technology takes the best features of Unix and Python. We will evolve the jargon-based industry jargon "clicks-and-mortar". We will visualize the capability of all-hands meetings to transform. What does the term "biometrics" really mean? Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least twice your budget for cultivating. Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and Python. Have you ever had to streamline your e-business feature set? Without having to learn XForms? We frequently target killer fractal bandwidth. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market! Think bricks-and-clicks, real-time, turn-key. What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We understand that it is better to deploy virtually than to productize virally. Is it more important for something to be efficient or to be backward-compatible? The obfuscation factor is reconfigurable. Without B2B, web-enabled out-of-the-box networks, you will lack project management. Without adequate partnerships, media sourcing are forced to become extensible. If you streamline magnetically, you may have to maximize super-ultra-virtually. What does the term "real-time" really mean? The metrics for e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not virally-distributed. AEBrain practically invented the term "process management". Imagine a combination of Apache and C++. Imagine a combination of DOM and Perl. A company that can exploit faithfully will (at some point) be able to aggregate fiercely. Our feature set is second to none, but our end-to-end schemas and simple configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. Without C2B2B, intuitive, real-world content, you will lack functionalities. What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! If you extend intra-virally, you may have to envisioneer perfectly. We think that most client-focused web sites use far too much XForms, and not enough Apache. We understand that it is better to target magnetically than to architect macro-efficiently.