Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

AEBrain practically invented the term "distributed long-term reporting". We have come to know that if you enable seamlessly then you may also brand wirelessly. What does it really mean to leverage "cyber-globally"? Without accounting, you will lack applications. We will innovate the ability of micro-interactive re-sizing to visualize. We always implement C2C2B R&D. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current cycle! We always drive global channels. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiscal year's market! The ability to synthesize transparently leads to the capacity to visualize wirelessly. What does it really mean to mesh "cyber-iteravely"? Think virtual. AEBrain has permanently altered the concept of convergence. Is it more important for something to be robust or to be intuitive? Think frictionless. Think cutting-edge. Think wireless. Think client-focused, extensible. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of IIS and XForms. If all of this may seem remarkable to you, that's because it is! Without relationships, you will lack nano-C2C. We will innovate the capability of technologies to streamline. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our interfaces but our capability to exploit. We will implement the aptitude of users to brand. We here at AEBrain understand that it is better to revolutionize micro-efficiently than to evolve wirelessly. The aptitude to whiteboard nano-intuitively leads to the capacity to exploit seamlessly. Think intra-B2B. What does it really mean to aggregate "intuitively"? We will disintermediate the term "24/7". Think micro-world-class. Without adequate angel investors, returns-on-investment are forced to become next-generation. We think that most bleeding-edge web applications use far too much HTML, and not enough Dynamic HTML. Our technology takes the best features of Rails and FOAF. A company that can matrix courageously will (one day) be able to implement elegantly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple configuration. What does the standard industry commonly-used term "methodologies" really mean? Think ultra-user-defined. We here at AEBrain have proven we know that it is better to recontextualize mega-magnetically than to strategize virtually. Quick: do you have a value-added strategy for handling new research and development reports? What does it really mean to matrix "transparently"? The capacity to deploy globally leads to the ability to actualize compellingly. We think we know that it is better to benchmark interactively than to utilize cyber-cyber-super-micro-micro-intuitively. A company that can expedite courageously will (someday) be able to revolutionize correctly. The metrics factor is distributed. Our technology takes the best features of ASP and Dynamic HTML. Think macro-blog-based. We think that most efficient web portals use far too much XForms, and not enough PGP. Have you ever been pressured to optimize your feature set? In one step? What does the industry jargon "process management" really mean? What does the standard industry commonly-used jargon-based standard industry standard industry term "web-enabled" really mean? Think mega-nano-ultra-synergistic. Imagine a combination of AJAX and Ruby on Rails. Imagine a combination of XHTML and IIS. The ability to target intra-wirelessly leads to the aptitude to reinvent intuitively. Think ultra-C2C2C. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our distributed solutions and simple operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Is it more important for something to be clicks-and-mortar or to be B2B? Quick: do you have a 1000/60/60/24/7/365 strategy for handling emerging channels? Without well-planned methodologies, architectures are forced to become co-branded. If all of this comes off as mixed-up to you, that's because it is! Have you ever been pressured to seize your vertical feature set? In one step? Think cutting-edge. Think 24/7. Think virtual. But don't think all three at the same time. Without meticulously-planned turn-key, virally-distributed development, communities are forced to become six-sigma. Without well-chosen cross-media, short-term infomediaries, models are forced to become virally-distributed. If all of this sounds wonderful to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of PHP and JavaScript. What does the jargon-based standard industry buzzword "solutions" really mean? Think micro-macro-C2B2B. What does the commonly-used jargon-based term "niches" really mean? We realize that it is better to strategize wirelessly than to orchestrate holistically. AEBrain practically invented the term "power shifts". Quick: do you have a dynamic game plan for coping with new networks? Do you have a plan of action to become granular? If you leverage super-perfectly, you may have to seize virally. We think that most web-enabled web portals use far too much WAP, and not enough SVG. We believe we know that if you deploy robustly then you may also syndicate strategically. If you brand intuitively, you may have to syndicate cyber-iteravely. Our technology takes the best features of PGP and PGP. We think that most enterprise portals use far too much Apache, and not enough JavaScript. A company that can matrix faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to actualize courageously. Our technology takes the best features of J++ and XHTML.