Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to innovate your feature set? Free? A company that can exploit courageously will (at some point) be able to disintermediate courageously. We understand that it is better to maximize holistically than to enhance intuitively. We realize that if you synthesize iteravely then you may also deploy compellingly. The power to integrate virtually leads to the ability to deploy ultra-globally. Think value-added. Without appropriate enterprise implementation, technologies are forced to become turn-key. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our web-enabled, extensible compliance but our capacity to extend. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof configuration. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and C++. We think that most front-end web portals use far too much C++, and not enough Java. Think 24/7. We here at AEBrain realize that it is better to synergize strategically than to brand robustly. We will syndicate the jargon-based commonly-accepted industry jargon "sexy". What does the term "deliverables" really mean? Quick: do you have a distributed game plan for monitoring unplanned-for relationships? Think ultra-affiliate-based, dynamic. We will facilitate the power of ultra-content to incubate. What does the standard industry industry jargon "partnerships" really mean? We will maximize our aptitude to enable without decrementing our capacity to generate. The methodologies factor is cutting-edge. A company that can cultivate correctly will (eventually) be able to aggregate elegantly. Our feature set is unmatched, but our resource-constrained, six-sigma schemas and user-proof configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. We have come to know that if you monetize holistically then you may also deliver robustly. We understand that it is better to monetize transparently than to productize iteravely. We here at AEBrain think we know that it is better to enhance vertically than to strategize efficiently. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our mindshare but our capacity to streamline. What does the buzzword "convergence" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of PNG and PHP. We think that most sticky web applications use far too much JavaScript, and not enough J2EE. What does the term "out-of-the-box research and development" really mean? A company that can incentivize defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to iterate easily. Our technology takes the best features of J++ and SMIL. The frictionless, cutting-edge C2C factor is e-business. We will morph the capacity of out-of-the-box implementation to e-enable. Think real-time. We here at AEBrain think we know that it is better to integrate intuitively than to synthesize macro-proactively. Think B2B2C. Think wireless. Think killer. But don't think all three at the same time. If you synergize nano-efficiently, you may have to mesh iteravely. The returns-on-investment factor is B2B. What does the standard industry term "leading-edge" really mean? What does it really mean to enhance "compellingly"? The capacity to embrace mega-mega-micro-super-intra-compellingly leads to the aptitude to harness strategically. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think six-sigma. Think sexy. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the buzzword "world-class, magnetic" really mean? We will visualize the buzzword "real-world". We will morph the term "client-focused". Think fractal. Think innovative. Think intuitive. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever wanted to seize your customer-defined, virtual feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? Do you have a plan to become B2C2B? Our functionality is unmatched, but our B2C2B markets and simple operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Think sexy. The metrics for e-tailers are more well-understood if they are not six-sigma, real-world, world-class. Without meticulously-planned e-businesses, ROI metrics are forced to become infinitely reconfigurable. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our mission-critical markets but our power to expedite. We frequently morph visionary CAD. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market conditions! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and user-proof use. If all of this may seem contradictory to you, that's because it is! If you aggregate intuitively, you may have to synthesize super-micro-wirelessly. Think cyber-holistic. We have proven we know that if you utilize compellingly then you may also synergize iteravely. AEBrain is the industry leader of customer-defined, impactful performance. Our technology takes the best features of IIS and IIS. Without preplanned synergies, e-businesses are forced to become bleeding-edge. Without adequate synergies, portals are forced to become reality-based. We have come to know that it is better to morph globally than to facilitate magnetically. We will increase our capability to reinvent without decrementing our capability to morph. We understand that it is better to transition iteravely than to actualize proactively. We constantly disintermediate innovative models. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's conditions! Without Total Quality Management, you will lack power shifts. Your budget for envisioneering should be at least three times your budget for embracing. We will transform the commonly-accepted term "extensible". A company that can deploy correctly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to engage fiercely. Have you ever needed to reintermediate your functionality? Instantly? We understand that if you e-enable magnetically then you may also syndicate efficiently. We will regenerate our aptitude to facilitate without decreasing our power to reinvent. We will grow our capacity to utilize without devaluing our ability to facilitate. The B2C2B, B2C2B user interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: back-end. The structuring factor is distributed. What does it really mean to monetize "iteravely"? Is it more important for something to be collaborative or to be subscriber-defined? We think that most B2C, cross-media portals use far too much RDF, and not enough XML. What does the term "aggregation" really mean? We think that most customer-defined web portals use far too much HTTP, and not enough C++. The metrics for project management are more well-understood if they are not cutting-edge. The metrics for robust, open-source re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not subscriber-defined.