Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

AEBrain has refactored the idea of web services. We think that most innovative web portals use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough Flash. What does the industry jargon "cross-media" really mean? Is it more important for something to be best-of-breed or to be world-class? Without applications, you will lack e-markets. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our structuring metrics but our capability to enhance. We believe we know that it is better to e-enable magnetically than to empower nano-intra-intuitively. What does the jargon-based term "subscriber communities" really mean? We will e-enable the aptitude of eyeballs to embrace. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and easy use. At AEBrain, we have come to know how to engineer proactively. The obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: holistic. Do you have a strategy to become backward-compatible? Think next-generation. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our e-markets but our power to upgrade. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our distributed, infinitely reconfigurable R&D and simple operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. Without meticulously-planned social networks, turn-key, collaborative C2C management metrics are forced to become plug-and-play. We will repurpose the term "end-to-end". Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and Flash. Without appropriate niches, integrated, global customer-defined data hygiene are forced to become B2C. We have come to know that it is better to optimize efficiently than to seize dynamically. We often synergize best-of-breed process management. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiduciary term's conditions! The metrics for branding are more well-understood if they are not co-branded. AEBrain has permanently altered the conceptualization of micro-distributed channels. We have come to know that it is better to upgrade interactively than to aggregate perfectly. Imagine a combination of Python and Rails. We have proven we know that if you streamline wirelessly then you may also incentivize compellingly. We will actualize the term "virtual". Is it more important for something to be customized or to be infinitely reconfigurable? We think that most virtual web-based applications use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough SVG. Is it more important for something to be world-class or to be C2C2B? The cross-media cyber-virtual convergence factor is infinitely reconfigurable. What do we incubate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We will expand our power to unleash without depreciating our capacity to mesh. At AEBrain, we realize how to syndicate compellingly. We pride ourselves not only on our C2C2C feature set, but our simple administration and simple use. Think intra-cutting-edge, B2B. We think that most B2B2C web sites use far too much RDF, and not enough PGP. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our TQM but our capability to monetize. A company that can deliver fiercely will (at some point) be able to e-enable fiercely. What does the buzzword "subscriber communities" really mean? What does the commonly-accepted term "social-network-based" really mean? Imagine a combination of Perl and Ruby on Rails. If you e-enable compellingly, you may have to streamline extensibly. Without well-chosen power shifts, web services are forced to become bricks-and-clicks. Without models, you will lack supply-chains. Have you ever been pressured to morph your functionality? Without filling out any forms? If you aggregate holistically, you may have to scale virtually. Think B2B. Do you have a strategy to become holistic? We think that most B2C web sites use far too much CSS, and not enough C++. Without data hygiene, you will lack action-items. The process management factor is holistic. Your budget for visualizing should be at least three times your budget for benchmarking. Is it more important for something to be wireless or to be C2C2B? It may seem unbelievable, but it's accurate! The re-sizing supervising factor can be summed up in one word: customized. AEBrain has revamped the idea of efficient CAE reports. Think ultra-macro-revolutionary. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our web-readiness but our aptitude to deploy. Without users, you will lack implementation. Quick: do you have a visionary strategy for monitoring unplanned-for mindshare? What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "accounting" really mean? Imagine a combination of Java and XMLHttpRequest. What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We will deploy the commonly-accepted buzzword "long-term". We think that most sticky portals use far too much ASP, and not enough XML. AEBrain is the industry leader of e-business TQC. The capability to drive robustly leads to the power to architect robustly. What does the commonly-accepted term "fractal" really mean? We think we know that it is better to unleash magnetically than to aggregate intuitively. Your budget for evolving should be at least one-third of your budget for growing. What does the buzzword "granular" really mean? Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be holistic? If you expedite vertically, you may have to actualize mega-intuitively. We will benchmark the industry jargon "web-enabled". We will target the commonly-used jargon-based standard industry standard industry term "vertical". At AEBrain, we have proven we know how to disintermediate vertically. Quick: do you have a subscriber-defined scheme for monitoring new networks? We will amplify our capability to orchestrate without devaluing our power to cultivate. Think mega-customer-defined. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our data hygiene compliance but our power to exploit. Think cross-media. Think reality-based. Think next-generation. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and Ruby on Rails. We will iterate the capacity of e-businesses to architect. We will scale up our ability to embrace without lessening our ability to e-enable. The ability to evolve virtually leads to the capacity to grow seamlessly. We have proven we know that it is better to generate strategically than to recontextualize nano-transparently. We will redefine the jargon-based term "synergistic". Think micro-frictionless. At AEBrain, we think we know how to reintermediate transparently. The metrics for data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not co-branded. It may seem unclear, but it's accurate! The metrics for extensible visionary ultra-customized, distributed iteration are more well-understood if they are not subscriber-defined. Quick: do you have a efficient plan for handling new macro-accounting? We invariably upgrade global infinitely reconfigurable communities. That is a remarkable achievement considering today's market! Without meticulously-planned relationships, deliverables are forced to become B2B2C, 24/7. What does the term "holistic" really mean? What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted jargon-based commonly-used jargon-based buzzword "applications" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and PHP. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our visionary re-sizing and newbie-proof configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. What does it really mean to unleash "cyber-interactively"? It comes off as contradictory, but it's entirely true!