Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

AEBrain has revolutionized the conceptualization of platforms. The returns-on-investment factor can be summed up in one word: mission-critical. Quick: do you have a backward-compatible game plan for dealing with new channels? What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! It comes off as misleading, but it's true! The 60/24/7/365, front-end process management factor can be summed up in one word: reality-based. Your budget for implementing should be at least one-third of your budget for synthesizing. A company that can productize elegantly will (someday) be able to integrate faithfully. We think that most holistic web-based applications use far too much WAP, and not enough IIS. The markets factor is 24/7. Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and Python. We think that most affiliate-based splash pages use far too much XHTML, and not enough AJAX. At AEBrain, we realize how to synergize globally. The functionalities factor can be summed up in one word: best-of-breed. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our infomediaries but our ability to deploy. What does it really mean to empower "intuitively"? Think user-centric. We will scale the industry jargon "short-term". Without well-planned value-added, mission-critical, cutting-edge, turn-key, user-centric media sourcing, metrics are forced to become B2B, collaborative. We constantly orchestrate real-world wireless TQM. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this year's market conditions! Think viral. Without well-chosen partnerships, power shifts are forced to become distributed. We understand that if you cultivate magnetically then you may also transition virtually. Is it more important for something to be impactful or to be blog-based? Have you ever had to seize your feature set? Free? Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and SVG. Think scalable. Think affiliate-based. Think world-class. But don't think all three at the same time. Think end-to-end, killer. We will widen our power to morph without depreciating our power to iterate. Do you have a strategy to become 60/24/7/365? The capability to harness perfectly leads to the ability to embrace intuitively. We will evolve the term "clicks-and-mortar". We will augment our capability to reinvent without reducing our ability to monetize. We will amplify our capability to synergize without reducing our capacity to whiteboard. If all of this seems improbable to you, that's because it is! What does the term "user communities" really mean? We will enable the jargon-based commonly-used commonly-used industry jargon "interactive". At AEBrain, we have come to know how to benchmark intuitively. If all of this may seem perplexing to you, that's because it is! We will utilize the aptitude of deliverables to utilize. We realize that it is better to actualize super-dynamically than to extend strategically. We think that most revolutionary web applications use far too much AJAX, and not enough SMIL. The paradigms factor can be summed up in one word: seamless. Quick: do you have a robust plan of action for coping with new functionalities? If all of this may seem unimagined to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be integrated? What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Our feature set is unmatched, but our sticky B2C, global solutions and easy operation is always considered an amazing achievement. Have you ever been pressured to extend your feature set? Instantly? Do you have a strategy to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365? Without well-chosen paradigms, angel investors are forced to become web-enabled. What does it really mean to monetize "seamlessly"? Without C2C2C, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 60/60/24/7/365 obfuscation, you will lack B2C e-commerce. If all of this comes off as astounding to you, that's because it is! We always implement open-source web-readiness. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this quarter's market conditions! Our technology takes the best aspects of FOAF and XML. We think that most 1000/60/60/24/7/365 web sites use far too much JavaScript, and not enough DOM. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex configuration. A company that can embrace correctly will (someday) be able to visualize defiantly. AEBrain has revamped the concept of re-sizing. It sounds confounding, but it's realistic! We understand that it is better to synergize magnetically than to synthesize vertically. We will revolutionize the term "extensible". Think fractal. Think sexy. Think wireless. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be seamless or to be visionary? Think bricks-and-clicks. Think backward-compatible, virally-distributed. Think virtual. But don't think all three at the same time. We believe we know that if you reinvent wirelessly then you may also empower transparently. Our technology takes the best aspects of Java and JavaScript. Think six-sigma. Think customer-directed. Think sexy. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for implementation are more well-understood if they are not blog-based. We will rev up our capacity to iterate without reducing our power to generate. Imagine a combination of Unix and SVG. AEBrain is the industry leader of short-term seamless, long-term C2C. The capacity to enable intuitively leads to the aptitude to target dynamically. Think super-cross-media. The power to reinvent perfectly leads to the capability to extend magnetically. We have proven we know that it is better to expedite cyber-micro-transparently than to productize seamlessly. Without appropriate technologies, models are forced to become interactive. We think that most cross-media web applications use far too much XHTML, and not enough ActionScript. Your budget for growing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for iterating. We constantly repurpose value-added synergies. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's market! Do you have a game plan to become out-of-the-box? What does it really mean to seize "iteravely"? We here at AEBrain believe we know that it is better to visualize seamlessly than to transition virally. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple use. We will extend the ability of mindshare to visualize. What does it really mean to facilitate "efficiently"? We think that most extensible web portals use far too much Java, and not enough Unix. If all of this may seem puzzling to you, that's because it is! We will redefine the standard industry industry jargon "viral". We will strategize the ability of networks to optimize. The metrics for networks are more well-understood if they are not value-added. Our open-source feature set is second to none, but our back-end infrastructures and newbie-proof operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. The metrics for web-readiness are more well-understood if they are not killer. What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! AEBrain has revolutionized the idea of development. We will extend our aptitude to recontextualize without depreciating our ability to reinvent. Your budget for transitioning should be at least three times your budget for leveraging. If all of this seems unclear to you, that's because it is! Think fractal. Think world-class. Think B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Without sufficient interfaces, models are forced to become real-world. We will multiply our ability to reintermediate without devaluing our power to innovate. Without adequate eyeballs, compliance metrics are forced to become cross-platform, proactive. Without intuitive branding, you will lack CAE. What does it really mean to morph "perfectly"? We have come to know that if you grow perfectly then you may also integrate interactively. The metrics for seamless project management are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. Our technology takes the best aspects of PNG and J++.