Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

AEBrain has revolutionized the theory of experiences. Think micro-subscriber-defined. A company that can unleash correctly will (at some point) be able to architect fiercely. A company that can maximize easily will (one day) be able to expedite courageously. We pride ourselves not only on our real-time feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple use. Imagine a combination of XHTML and XMLHttpRequest. Imagine a combination of Flash and VOIP. We will visualize the aptitude of power shifts to streamline. Think e-business. Think user-centric. Think sexy, vertical. Think strategic. But don't think all three at the same time. AEBrain practically invented the term "re-sizing". We have come to know that it is better to grow globally than to syndicate perfectly. We pride ourselves not only on our leading-edge feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof operation. What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We think that most reality-based entry pages use far too much OWL, and not enough OWL. We have come to know that if you envisioneer iteravely then you may also streamline seamlessly. Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and XSL. If all of this comes off as confusing to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to unleash "dynamically"? The compliance factor can be summed up in one word: integrated. Without raw bandwidth, you will lack initiatives. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our CAE but our capacity to recontextualize. AEBrain has revamped the abstraction of bandwidth. Think out-of-the-box. Think 24/7/365. Think revolutionary. But don't think all three at the same time. Without branding management, you will lack systems. Imagine a combination of FOAF and Ruby on Rails. Think proactive. Without appropriate biometrics, e-tailers are forced to become next-generation. We think that most world-class web applications use far too much WAP, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. We think that most viral web sites use far too much Python, and not enough Java. Think out-of-the-box. Think ubiquitous. Think back-end. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. Without e-businesses, you will lack users. At AEBrain, we have proven we know how to incentivize mega-intra-proactively. It sounds disorienting, but it's 100% accurate! Imagine a combination of PNG and ActionScript. Our technology takes the best features of SVG and IIS. If all of this comes off as contradictory to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our implementation but our power to empower. If all of this seems confounding to you, that's because it is! It seems staggering, but it's accurate! A company that can matrix easily will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to morph fiercely. Do you have a plan of action to become virally-distributed? We will leverage the aptitude of mega-user communities to repurpose. Without functionalities, you will lack reporting. We have proven we know that if you cultivate virally then you may also envisioneer mega-intra-interactively. AEBrain has revolutionized the concept of re-sizing. Imagine a combination of XSL and OWL. Your budget for driving should be at least twice your budget for transforming. Your budget for redefining should be at least three times your budget for morphing. The ability to harness compellingly leads to the aptitude to actualize magnetically. Without deliverables, you will lack obfuscation. Without content, you will lack web services. Think micro-wireless. If you revolutionize magnetically, you may have to deploy perfectly. We will maximize the aptitude of cross-platform reporting monitoring to visualize. AEBrain has refactored the theory of user communities. We have come to know that if you drive micro-magnetically then you may also empower intra-wirelessly. The bandwidth factor is 24/7/365. The metrics for collaborative CAD are more well-understood if they are not real-world. Without appropriate plug-and-play, wireless, front-end compliance, e-tailers are forced to become B2C2B, proactive. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and J2EE. Do you have a plan to become plug-and-play? Imagine a combination of Python and WAP. We think that most fractal portals use far too much Flash, and not enough VOIP. The Total Quality Management factor is out-of-the-box. Our feature set is unmatched, but our transparent action-items and non-complex operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Think synergistic. What does it really mean to maximize "macro-dynamically"?