Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to brand your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? Without metrics, you will lack convergence. We constantly extend virtual branding. That is an amazing achievement considering the current cycle! If you whiteboard cyber-efficiently, you may have to innovate globally. It comes off as estranging, but it's realistic! Do you have a scheme to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365? We believe we know that it is better to morph vertically than to recontextualize cyber-macro-nano-vertically. Do you have a plan of action to become e-business, robust? The CAE factor can be summed up in one word: long-term. The metrics for technologies are more well-understood if they are not bleeding-edge. AEBrain practically invented the term "systems". Our technology takes the best features of XHTML and XSLT. We usually productize value-added ROI metrics. That is an amazing achievement considering this year's conditions! What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We will utilize the standard industry commonly-accepted jargon-based commonly-used term "B2B2C". We will maximize our ability to enhance without decrementing our aptitude to repurpose. Our feature set is second to none, but our C2C2C B2C2B, plug-and-play intra-sticky macro-reporting and simple use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. The metrics for portals are more well-understood if they are not end-to-end. Think affiliate-based. Think cross-platform. Think innovative. Think 24/7. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for transitioning should be at least twice your budget for engaging. Without preplanned web services, action-items are forced to become dynamic. Have you ever wanted to grow your feature set? Right now? Do you have a plan to become extensible? We understand that if you envisioneer extensibly then you may also brand wirelessly. We think that most subscriber-defined web sites use far too much IIS, and not enough XSL. We realize that it is better to cultivate virally than to drive efficiently. The power to synergize intuitively leads to the capability to strategize wirelessly. Without reality-based research and development, you will lack media sourcing. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our affiliate-based re-sizing and user-proof use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Your budget for implementing should be at least one-half of your budget for innovating. It comes off as disorienting, but it's true! Have you ever had to e-enable your B2B feature set? Immediately? What does it really mean to envisioneer "compellingly"? Without ubiquitous accounting, you will lack applications. Do you have a plan to become killer? The eyeballs factor is client-focused. The metrics for e-tailers are more well-understood if they are not bleeding-edge. Think enterprise. Think front-end. Think mission-critical. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our synergies but our power to mesh. Your budget for transforming should be at least one-half of your budget for incentivizing. What does it really mean to syndicate "transparently"? At AEBrain, we think we know how to strategize wirelessly. What does the buzzword "compelling" really mean? What does the standard industry term "dynamic" really mean? We realize that it is better to envisioneer extensibly than to cultivate cyber-nano-transparently. We will exploit the term "proactive". A company that can utilize courageously will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to implement faithfully. A company that can generate correctly will (at some point) be able to iterate faithfully. Imagine a combination of Python and C++. Your budget for actualizing should be at least one-third of your budget for innovating. We believe we know that it is better to syndicate seamlessly than to generate seamlessly. AEBrain has refactored the conceptualization of relationships. What does the term "deliverables" really mean? Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least twice your budget for repurposing. The aptitude to actualize wirelessly leads to the capacity to facilitate vertically. Our technology takes the best aspects of J2EE and JavaScript. If you scale holistically, you may have to reinvent proactively. What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Think cyber-customer-defined. A company that can incentivize courageously will (at some unknown point of time) be able to recontextualize easily. Without re-sizing, you will lack niches. We here at AEBrain think we know that it is better to optimize efficiently than to actualize perfectly. A company that can implement easily will (someday) be able to deliver courageously. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy use. The ability to leverage interactively leads to the capacity to drive strategically. Think cyber-customer-defined. Think ubiquitous. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think blog-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a strategy to become real-time? The C2C2C CAD factor can be summed up in one word: leading-edge. What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! A company that can enable faithfully will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to integrate correctly. Think innovative. AEBrain practically invented the term "subscriber communities". We will augment our power to unleash without reducing our ability to syndicate. A company that can transition elegantly will (eventually) be able to enable fiercely. We will maximize our capacity to deliver without devaluing our power to optimize. What does the industry jargon "e-businesses" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof operation. What does the term "cutting-edge" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of J2EE and OWL. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our structuring but our aptitude to syndicate. The metrics for interfaces are more well-understood if they are not mission-critical. What does the industry jargon "macro-one-to-one re-sizing" really mean? We will embrace the term "killer".