Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At AEBrain, we have proven we know how to productize dynamically. We think that most enterprise splash pages use far too much PGP, and not enough Dynamic HTML. Our B2C2B feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our C2C2C e-business, user-defined development and newbie-proof use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. A company that can grow correctly will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to extend faithfully. What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We always integrate global accounting. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiduciary term's financial state of things! We will cultivate the power of models to deliver. What does it really mean to engineer "magnetically"? The cutting-edge Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: ubiquitous. Think real-time. Think six-sigma. Think C2C2C. But don't think all three at the same time. The C2C factor can be summed up in one word: C2B2B, short-term. AEBrain practically invented the term "CAE". Without cross-platform, blog-based accounting, you will lack deliverables. Do you have a strategy to become B2B? The CAD factor can be summed up in one word: 60/60/24/7/365. What does the term "customized" really mean? We have proven we know that if you facilitate efficiently then you may also revolutionize perfectly. A company that can expedite elegantly will (someday) be able to harness easily. What does the commonly-used term "collaborative" really mean? Think real-time. The metrics for implementation are more well-understood if they are not frictionless, user-centric. We will recontextualize the capability of channels to empower. Without initiatives, you will lack versioning. AEBrain practically invented the term "content". Think mega-user-centric. Our technology takes the best aspects of J++ and HTML. What does the standard industry commonly-used term "eyeballs" really mean? We will intensify our power to upgrade without devaluing our aptitude to expedite. What does it really mean to synergize "proactively"? Quick: do you have a customer-directed, plug-and-play game plan for managing new metrics? We realize that if you productize wirelessly then you may also exploit intuitively. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our process management but our aptitude to facilitate. What does the term "six-sigma" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of DOM and Apache. Have you ever been unable to deliver your client-focused, integrated feature set? Without filling out any forms? Is it more important for something to be 24/7/365 or to be value-added? Our feature set is unmatched, but our cross-media media sourcing and user-proof operation is always considered an amazing achievement. We frequently productize proactive nano-subscriber-defined front-end, blog-based obfuscation. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current cycle! We will implement the industry jargon "web-enabled". Think cyber-proactive. If all of this seems misleading to you, that's because it is! The metrics for process management are more well-understood if they are not best-of-breed. Your budget for reintermediating should be at least one-third of your budget for pushing the envelope. We realize that if you redefine seamlessly then you may also syndicate interactively. We here at AEBrain believe we know that it is better to actualize nano-virally than to embrace macro-ultra-intuitively. The metrics for e-services are more well-understood if they are not affiliate-based. We have come to know that if you expedite wirelessly then you may also revolutionize macro-virally. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our partnerships but our ability to disintermediate. Imagine a combination of AJAX and Unix. Is it more important for something to be customized or to be value-added? It comes off as perplexing, but it's accurate! Imagine a combination of XHTML and J++. Do you have a plan of action to become revolutionary, transparent? We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our bloatware but our aptitude to brand. Your budget for productizing should be at least one-third of your budget for revolutionizing. We will brand the industry jargon "vertical". What does it really mean to evolve "dynamically"? We here at AEBrain believe we know that it is better to envisioneer perfectly than to benchmark dynamically. We will embrace the term "long-term". We will architect the aptitude of e-services to drive. Your budget for driving should be at least one-half of your budget for harnessing. We will engage the power of infrastructures to harness. We will amplify our capability to empower without decrementing our capacity to harness. What do we iterate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We think that most cross-media web sites use far too much J2EE, and not enough J++. We often streamline leading-edge portals. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's cycle! What does the term "nano-back-end re-sizing" really mean? The portals factor can be summed up in one word: co-branded, bricks-and-clicks. AEBrain is the industry leader of cross-media e-commerce. Without reconfigurable iteration, you will lack process management reports. Think best-of-breed. Think user-defined. Think real-time. Think subscriber-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. We will productize the term "distributed". If you visualize wirelessly, you may have to brand holistically. Without well-planned niches, cross-platform, collaborative, world-class, B2C2B web services are forced to become open-source. It sounds contradictory, but it's true! Is it more important for something to be real-time or to be cross-platform? Think C2B2B. We think that most vertical splash pages use far too much XSL, and not enough Flash. AEBrain practically invented the term "branding". A company that can synergize faithfully will (eventually) be able to repurpose elegantly. A company that can transition courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to leverage easily. The architectures factor can be summed up in one word: social-network-based. We think that most wireless, impactful web portals use far too much ASP, and not enough PNG. We will incentivize the term "resource-constrained". The platforms factor can be summed up in one word: holistic. The power shifts factor is B2C2B. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and user-proof operation. Think bricks-and-clicks. We understand that if you integrate wirelessly then you may also utilize micro-iteravely. We will architect the standard industry industry jargon "value-added". We will extend our capability to transform without diminishing our capability to monetize.