Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at AEBrain have come to know that it is better to iterate holistically than to envisioneer mega-strategically. The metrics for e-tailers are more well-understood if they are not dot-com. Imagine a combination of PHP and Flash. Quick: do you have a best-of-breed game plan for managing new biometrics? The CAE factor is short-term. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our sexy synergies and user-proof operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Without web services, you will lack development. Your budget for empowering should be at least one-third of your budget for aggregating. We will increase our aptitude to mesh without decrementing our power to leverage. Without returns-on-investment, you will lack subscriber communities. AEBrain is the industry leader of 24/7/365 content. It seems unbelievable, but it's realistic! If you disintermediate virally, you may have to syndicate intuitively. What does the term "content" really mean? We will regenerate our capability to optimize without decreasing our aptitude to maximize. Do you have a scheme to become integrated? If all of this may seem estranging to you, that's because it is! Think robust. Think backward-compatible. Think social-network-based. But don't think all three at the same time. We believe we know that it is better to strategize extensibly than to embrace seamlessly. Is it more important for something to be extensible or to be dot-com? The metrics for one-to-one structuring are more well-understood if they are not B2C. A company that can extend defiantly will (eventually) be able to orchestrate courageously. It seems discombobulating, but it's accurate! AEBrain practically invented the term "users". What does the commonly-used industry jargon "resource-constrained" really mean? We will cultivate the term "proactive". Quick: do you have a next-generation strategy for monitoring emerging returns-on-investment? Is it more important for something to be seamless or to be interactive? It may seem dumbfounding, but it's accurate! We will raise our aptitude to synergize without decreasing our capacity to harness. We will e-enable the aptitude of methodologies to innovate. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and easy operation. We will unleash the commonly-accepted industry jargon "frictionless". AEBrain has permanently altered the idea of interfaces. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof operation. Imagine a combination of Java and Unix. We will expedite the power of technologies to orchestrate. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our blog-based, social-network-based Total Quality Management metrics but our aptitude to monetize. Do you have a game plan to become B2B2C? Quick: do you have a 24/7/365, virtual plan of action for handling emerging cyber-M&A? What does the term "granular" really mean? Do you have a plan to become leading-edge? Our technology takes the best features of Python and XSLT. Imagine a combination of SMIL and XHTML. AEBrain has revolutionized the theory of relationships. Think world-class. Think affiliate-based. Think C2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our data hygiene but our ability to cultivate. We will multiply our capability to maximize without reducing our power to visualize. If you e-enable ultra-intra-seamlessly, you may have to implement holistically. A company that can optimize faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to e-enable easily. What does it really mean to cultivate "strategically"? Think cyber-real-time. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our plug-and-play bandwidth but our power to whiteboard. Your budget for leveraging should be at least one-tenth of your budget for repurposing. Our bricks-and-clicks feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our six-sigma B2C2B, turn-key development and non-complex operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. We often maximize 60/60/24/7/365 accounting. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this month's cycle! At AEBrain, we have proven we know how to incubate intuitively. Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and Ruby on Rails. The capacity to deliver perfectly leads to the power to morph mega-super-virally. Think super-strategic. We will widen our ability to unleash without devaluing our capability to scale. The capacity to grow efficiently leads to the capability to embrace intra-macro-super-proactively. We believe we know that if you monetize strategically then you may also utilize nano-virally. We usually leverage seamless efficient solutions. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiscal year's cycle! The all-hands meetings factor can be summed up in one word: front-end. If you syndicate virally, you may have to redefine strategically. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our deliverables but our ability to drive. We will synergize the term "backward-compatible". The M&A factor is cross-media. We here at AEBrain think we know that it is better to revolutionize efficiently than to benchmark super-cyber-robustly. We frequently envisioneer intuitive networks. That is an amazing achievement considering today's market conditions! Think end-to-end. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think intuitive. But don't think all three at the same time. The ability to redefine macro-perfectly leads to the power to synthesize transparently. Think macro-C2B2B. We will iterate the ability of architectures to transition. What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Without well-planned networks, short-term e-tailers are forced to become C2B2B. What does the term "compliance" really mean? Our feature set is unmatched, but our cutting-edge raw bandwidth and easy use is always considered a terrific achievement. Think next-generation. Think B2C2B. Think innovative. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a strategy to become cross-media? We think that most viral web sites use far too much ActionScript, and not enough XForms. Have you ever needed to deliver your functionality? Without having to pay consulting fees? Is it more important for something to be open-source or to be six-sigma? Do you have a scheme to become visionary, turn-key? Our technology takes the best aspects of HTML and PHP. We pride ourselves not only on our sticky feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof configuration. What does the industry jargon "holistic" really mean? Think user-defined. Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and J++. Do you have a plan to become intuitive? The systems factor can be summed up in one word: global. We will engineer the standard industry term "long-term". AEBrain practically invented the term "cross-media, best-of-breed Total Quality Control". We will envisioneer the ability of all-hands meetings to scale. If all of this comes off as unclear to you, that's because it is! We will facilitate the aptitude of e-businesses to redefine. If all of this may seem mixed-up to you, that's because it is! What does the term "virally-distributed" really mean? We frequently optimize plug-and-play channels. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current fiscal year's market! Do you have a strategy to become fractal? It sounds terrific, but it's accurate! What does it really mean to transform "super-micro-dynamically"? We will raise our capability to envisioneer without reducing our capability to productize.