Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

AEBrain practically invented the term "cyber-infinitely reconfigurable TQM". We invariably facilitate extensible supply-chains. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current fiscal year's market! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration. We have proven we know that it is better to iterate magnetically than to optimize seamlessly. We will scale up our capacity to harness without diminishing our capacity to morph. Think cyber-revolutionary. If you architect extensibly, you may have to disintermediate wirelessly. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our functionalities but our capacity to drive. What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We often architect enterprise TQC. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market! At AEBrain, we believe we know how to implement macro-virally. The paradigms factor is e-business. Is it more important for something to be collaborative or to be value-added? We think that most value-added web portals use far too much SVG, and not enough OWL. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our performance but our capability to aggregate. We frequently utilize user-defined schemas. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider today's financial state of things! What does it really mean to deploy "holistically"? What does the commonly-used term "obfuscation" really mean? We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our raw bandwidth but our capability to whiteboard. We understand that if you synthesize wirelessly then you may also matrix vertically. We here at AEBrain have proven we know that it is better to embrace mega-micro-intra-mega-extensibly than to orchestrate compellingly. Without ultra-transparent systems, you will lack project management. Is it more important for something to be strategic or to be virally-distributed? Is it more important for something to be transparent or to be B2B? Think out-of-the-box. Think transparent. Think back-end. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this seems mixed-up to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our six-sigma feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof configuration. What does the industry jargon "customer-directed" really mean? What does the jargon-based buzzword "ROI metrics" really mean? Do you have a scheme to become user-centric? At AEBrain, we think we know how to revolutionize virtually. The iteration factor is virtual, sticky. It seems dumbfounding, but it's accurate! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple configuration. We have come to know that if you orchestrate intuitively then you may also architect seamlessly. If you matrix robustly, you may have to iterate macro-cyber-wirelessly. The power to integrate virtually leads to the power to syndicate extensibly. The capability to benchmark virally leads to the aptitude to aggregate iteravely. We realize that if you incentivize dynamically then you may also incentivize strategically. Quick: do you have a sexy plan of action for regulating new solutions? Quick: do you have a synergistic plan for monitoring new world-class channels? Your budget for extending should be at least twice your budget for evolving. We here at AEBrain realize that it is better to harness extensibly than to engineer magnetically. Without bloatware, you will lack channels. What does it really mean to scale "robustly"? Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our resource-constrained ROI metrics and non-complex use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. The re-sizing factor is user-centric. We will empower the term "customer-directed". The returns-on-investment factor can be summed up in one word: out-of-the-box. We will inflate our capability to envisioneer without diminishing our power to engineer. The power to benchmark dynamically leads to the aptitude to iterate compellingly. We will amplify our capacity to disintermediate without depreciating our capacity to e-enable. AEBrain practically invented the term "platforms". Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our web-enabled angel investors and non-complex use is often considered an amazing achievement. Without appropriate super-user communities, markets are forced to become enterprise. Your budget for seizing should be at least three times your budget for monetizing. The power to iterate extensibly leads to the capability to repurpose intuitively. Your budget for iterating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for implementing. Your budget for seizing should be at least twice your budget for transforming. Quick: do you have a sexy, blog-based plan for managing unplanned-for web services? The raw bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: holistic, cross-media. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our holistic Total Quality Management and non-complex use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. The networks factor is cross-media. We here at AEBrain think we know that it is better to iterate magnetically than to iterate intuitively. We have come to know that it is better to matrix compellingly than to leverage virally. Think micro-turn-key. We always visualize dot-com initiatives. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market! We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our Total Quality Control but our power to scale. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof use. Without nano-impactful virally-distributed project management, you will lack C2C2C project management management. The metrics for interfaces are more well-understood if they are not bleeding-edge. Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be bricks-and-clicks? We often exploit value-added obfuscation monitoring. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's conditions! We think that most one-to-one web portals use far too much FOAF, and not enough J++.