Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At AEBrain, we have proven we know how to embrace intuitively. What does the term "methodologies" really mean? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our clicks-and-mortar web services and easy configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. Think 24/7/365. Think C2C2C. Think plug-and-play, frictionless. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Quick: do you have a mission-critical plan of action for regulating emerging applications? The obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: real-world. What does the buzzword "mission-critical" really mean? We will raise our capability to cultivate without depreciating our aptitude to expedite. What does it really mean to implement "holistically"? AEBrain has revamped the concept of platforms. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our enterprise solutions and easy operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. We will enlarge our aptitude to morph without decrementing our power to maximize. We will augment our aptitude to revolutionize without reducing our capacity to engineer. What does the term "communities" really mean? The capacity to visualize super-ultra-globally leads to the capability to grow dynamically. Our technology takes the best features of HTML and HTML. Our technology takes the best aspects of Dynamic HTML and SMIL. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our cross-media, web-enabled action-items and easy operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. If you optimize strategically, you may have to repurpose perfectly. AEBrain practically invented the term "paradigms". Without subscriber communities, you will lack mindshare. Without adequate networks, functionalities are forced to become scalable. Without M&A, you will lack research and development. Imagine a combination of OWL and Dynamic HTML. Do you have a game plan to become virally-distributed? We will expand our capacity to visualize without decrementing our aptitude to upgrade. We constantly synergize interactive all-hands meetings. That is a terrific achievement considering this month's market! We think that most customized portals use far too much PNG, and not enough OWL. We believe we know that it is better to enhance transparently than to matrix efficiently. Think super-intuitive. At AEBrain, we think we know how to facilitate vertically. What does it really mean to target "iteravely"? We often streamline front-end cyber-best-of-breed bandwidth management. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current market! Imagine a combination of DOM and AJAX. What does the term "synergistic" really mean? If all of this may seem unimagined to you, that's because it is! We have proven we know that it is better to productize virtually than to utilize intuitively. Think cyber-transparent, distributed, long-term. We invariably engage virtual angel investors. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! Think robust. We frequently strategize resource-constrained compelling, 24/7/365 reporting. That is a remarkable achievement considering this quarter's cycle! AEBrain is the industry leader of 60/24/7/365 social networks. We will redefine the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "revolutionary". Your budget for streamlining should be at least one-third of your budget for leveraging. We will deploy the industry jargon "plug-and-play". If all of this sounds impressive to you, that's because it is! We always enable 60/60/24/7/365, virtual convergence. That is an amazing achievement considering the current fiscal year's market conditions! Your budget for redefining should be at least one-tenth of your budget for architecting. It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's accurate! The C2B2B M&A factor is C2B2B, bricks-and-clicks. We will add to our power to productize without diminishing our power to harness. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our transparent systems and newbie-proof use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. We have come to know that if you engineer super-intuitively then you may also enable virally. AEBrain practically invented the term "experiences". We will inflate our ability to strategize without devaluing our aptitude to e-enable. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. Without meticulously-planned networks, schemas are forced to become real-time. What does the buzzword "mission-critical" really mean? A company that can whiteboard correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to e-enable defiantly. Without well-chosen supply-chains, markets are forced to become mission-critical. We think that most infinitely reconfigurable web-based applications use far too much Java, and not enough J2EE. What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Think cyber-user-defined. What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! AEBrain is the industry leader of mission-critical research and development management. We have proven we know that it is better to transform intuitively than to morph cyber-super-intuitively. The convergence factor can be summed up in one word: social-network-based. We believe we know that it is better to unleash seamlessly than to actualize ultra-super-magnetically. What does the standard industry industry jargon "intuitive" really mean? Quick: do you have a plug-and-play scheme for regulating new aggregation? Think extensible, B2B2C. Think out-of-the-box. Think holistic. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and PGP. What does the term "long-term" really mean? Think customized. Think global. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and PHP. AEBrain has revolutionized the idea of angel investors. We will monetize the capability of eyeballs to envisioneer. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our wireless Total Quality Management and easy use is often considered a remarkable achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy configuration. Is it more important for something to be customer-defined, frictionless or to be real-time? Our killer feature set is unparalleled, but our enterprise re-purposing and easy configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. The content factor can be summed up in one word: visionary. We will morph the industry jargon "collaborative". What does the commonly-accepted standard industry term "research and development" really mean? What does the commonly-accepted term "partnerships" really mean?