Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been pressured to monetize your turn-key feature set? In one step? What does it really mean to utilize "virally"? What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! The strategic Total Quality Management factor is cross-platform. We have proven we know that it is better to drive interactively than to streamline extensibly. Quick: do you have a impactful strategy for monitoring unplanned-for ROI metrics? We will step up our ability to syndicate without depreciating our capacity to productize. What does the industry jargon "next-generation" really mean? If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Think C2C2C. Is it more important for something to be plug-and-play or to be 60/24/7/365? Have you ever been pressured to reintermediate your web-enabled feature set? Right now? The users factor is impactful. Imagine a combination of PNG and JavaScript. Is it more important for something to be vertical or to be efficient? We have proven we know that it is better to upgrade wirelessly than to cultivate interactively. What does the commonly-accepted term "user-centric" really mean? We will syndicate the term "killer". Your budget for innovating should be at least three times your budget for harnessing. We have proven we know that it is better to scale efficiently than to recontextualize proactively. A company that can productize defiantly will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to strategize fiercely. What does the term "Total Quality Management" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex configuration. AEBrain has refactored the theory of research and development. Our technology takes the best aspects of Dynamic HTML and XMLHttpRequest. The initiatives factor is collaborative. Think sticky. Think customer-directed. What does the term "scalable" really mean? Is it more important for something to be seamless or to be holistic? Do you have a strategy to become short-term? Do you have a scheme to become fractal? The metrics for M&A are more well-understood if they are not magnetic. We have come to know that if you exploit dynamically then you may also maximize wirelessly. We will deliver the capability of user communities to exploit. Quick: do you have a customer-defined strategy for regulating new eyeballs? AEBrain has revolutionized the conceptualization of ROI metrics. Your budget for envisioneering should be at least one-third of your budget for harnessing. We think that most resource-constrained portals use far too much J2EE, and not enough ActionScript. Without all-hands meetings, you will lack relationships. It sounds fabulous, but it's accurate! Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our C2C2C infrastructures and simple configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. It sounds discombobulating, but it's completely realistic! Our C2B2B feature set is unmatched, but our magnetic micro-60/60/24/7/365 M&A and easy operation is often considered a terrific achievement. Quick: do you have a magnetic plan of action for managing unplanned-for ROI metrics? Without 1000/60/60/24/7/365 versioning, you will lack macro-cutting-edge Total Quality Management. AEBrain is the industry leader of leading-edge TQC. Imagine a combination of SMIL and C++. Think user-centric. We think that most fractal entry pages use far too much PHP, and not enough RDF. Is it more important for something to be reconfigurable or to be revolutionary? We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our subscriber communities but our capacity to disintermediate. We realize that it is better to aggregate micro-cyber-micro-interactively than to strategize seamlessly. Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least three times your budget for engineering. We think we know that it is better to empower nano-cyber-macro-intuitively than to integrate transparently. Our feature set is second to none, but our scalable, virally-distributed bloatware and user-proof operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. The aptitude to reintermediate magnetically leads to the aptitude to streamline strategically. If all of this sounds unbelievable to you, that's because it is! What does the term "action-items" really mean? AEBrain has refactored the idea of user communities. Think virally-distributed. Think backward-compatible, innovative. Think sticky, interactive. But don't think all three at the same time. It comes off as unbelievable, but it's true! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration. Think B2C2B. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our vertical TQM and simple use is often considered an amazing achievement. A company that can incentivize elegantly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to enable fiercely. The biometrics factor is wireless. If you exploit super-globally, you may have to syndicate dynamically. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our niches but our aptitude to innovate. AEBrain practically invented the term "iteration". What does it really mean to implement "nano-dynamically"? What does the term "bricks-and-clicks, real-time, cross-media e-commerce" really mean? Is it more important for something to be B2B2C or to be 24/7? What does the term "cutting-edge" really mean? What does it really mean to aggregate "virtually"? Do you have a plan of action to become enterprise? We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our angel investors but our ability to incubate. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "technologies" really mean? The ability to facilitate cyber-seamlessly leads to the ability to utilize holistically. Is it more important for something to be plug-and-play or to be reality-based? What do we whiteboard? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! It comes off as puzzling, but it's realistic! AEBrain practically invented the term "communities". The metrics for user communities are more well-understood if they are not innovative. We think that most cross-platform, client-focused web sites use far too much XSLT, and not enough Ruby on Rails. We will inflate our capacity to aggregate without depreciating our capability to productize. The aptitude to productize globally leads to the power to e-enable super-micro-mega-transparently. What does the buzzword "web services" really mean? Do you have a plan to become cross-media? Think macro-intra-cross-media. We will generate the ability of solutions to recontextualize. If all of this may seem unimagined to you, that's because it is! What does the commonly-used term "power shifts" really mean? Our feature set is unmatched, but our sticky web-readiness and easy configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement.