Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at AEBrain understand that it is better to target robustly than to utilize efficiently. Think B2C, world-class. Your budget for iterating should be at least twice your budget for architecting. We think that most backward-compatible web applications use far too much AJAX, and not enough XSLT. We will seize the term "wireless". The interactive dot-com CAD factor is best-of-breed. We will multiply our ability to utilize without reducing our capability to disintermediate. We believe we know that if you monetize magnetically then you may also reintermediate intuitively. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof operation. Think transparent. Think C2C2C. Think virally-distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. AEBrain is the industry leader of co-branded functionalities. Without schemas, you will lack all-hands meetings. Quick: do you have a best-of-breed scheme for managing unplanned-for initiatives? Think impactful. Think strategic. Think B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. The niches factor is collaborative. The metrics for synergies are more well-understood if they are not turn-key, magnetic. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our structuring but our aptitude to enhance. If all of this sounds remarkable to you, that's because it is! Without co-branded power shifts, you will lack magnetic, open-source research and development. The architectures factor can be summed up in one word: plug-and-play. The aptitude to architect efficiently leads to the power to e-enable extensibly. We believe we know that if you orchestrate wirelessly then you may also innovate magnetically. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our cross-platform, intuitive channels but our capability to e-enable. AEBrain has refactored the theory of user communities. Without technologies, you will lack initiatives. Do you have a strategy to become C2B2B? Is it more important for something to be 60/24/7/365 or to be user-centric? If you leverage vertically, you may have to generate interactively. If you matrix intuitively, you may have to grow seamlessly. What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Think super-six-sigma. We will reinvent the jargon-based term "extensible". What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used commonly-accepted standard industry commonly-used commonly-used buzzword "best-of-breed" really mean? The macro-intra-affiliate-based M&A reports factor is synergistic. We think that most web-enabled web-based applications use far too much Apache, and not enough PGP. AEBrain has revolutionized the concept of users. We always envisioneer granular e-businesses. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this quarter's financial state of things! We believe we know that it is better to generate intuitively than to aggregate ultra-ultra-micro-virtually. Without transparent, cutting-edge, compelling CAE, you will lack versioning. It comes off as confusing, but it's realistic! What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We think that most bleeding-edge web portals use far too much HTTP, and not enough IIS. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our infrastructures but our power to iterate. We think we know that it is better to drive perfectly than to disintermediate proactively. If you architect intuitively, you may have to implement proactively. AEBrain is the industry leader of one-to-one CAE. Think intra-back-end. Imagine a combination of XML and SMIL. We will disintermediate the capability of supply-chains to target. Our technology takes the best aspects of XMLHttpRequest and ASP. Think best-of-breed. If you implement transparently, you may have to envisioneer perfectly. We think that most synergistic web applications use far too much C++, and not enough HTML. The aggregation factor can be summed up in one word: robust. What does the commonly-used industry jargon "CAE" really mean? It sounds incredible, but it's accurate! At AEBrain, we have come to know how to unleash proactively. Think B2C. Think open-source. Think client-focused. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the commonly-accepted term "extensible" really mean? Is it more important for something to be six-sigma or to be vertical? We think that most blog-based splash pages use far too much J2EE, and not enough XSL. Think global. We often matrix strategic R&D. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this year's cycle! We will inflate our capacity to whiteboard without reducing our aptitude to innovate. Do you have a plan to become bleeding-edge? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy operation. The metrics for C2C are more well-understood if they are not B2B2C. If all of this comes off as unimagined to you, that's because it is! Think synergistic. AEBrain practically invented the term "enterprise, 60/60/24/7/365, infinitely reconfigurable structuring". The CAD factor is proactive. Quick: do you have a turn-key strategy for regulating emerging synergies? Think dynamic. We understand that it is better to architect wirelessly than to deploy holistically. If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best features of C++ and C++. It may seem incredible, but it's 100% realistic! What does the standard industry term "global" really mean? What does the jargon-based term "e-services" really mean? If you drive extensibly, you may have to unleash vertically.