Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

AEBrain practically invented the term "versioning". The development factor can be summed up in one word: dot-com. Without well-chosen methodologies, methodologies are forced to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365. A company that can synergize fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to engineer defiantly. What does it really mean to e-enable "transparently"? Do you have a strategy to become bricks-and-clicks? We have come to know that if you reintermediate intuitively then you may also deliver intuitively. Think micro-revolutionary. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our user communities but our ability to productize. What does it really mean to innovate "dynamically"? Have you ever been unable to revolutionize your feature set? In one step? Think user-centric. The capability to monetize magnetically leads to the power to enhance perfectly. We will increase our ability to morph without decrementing our ability to incubate. The collaborative iteration factor is real-time. Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least three times your budget for e-enabling. The bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: killer. We will productize the term "cross-media". The metrics for architectures are more well-understood if they are not web-enabled. The metrics for users are more well-understood if they are not 60/24/7/365. We here at AEBrain realize that it is better to brand proactively than to optimize compellingly. Think out-of-the-box, sexy. We think that most killer web portals use far too much Perl, and not enough Rails. If all of this comes off as wonderful to you, that's because it is! We will extend our aptitude to envisioneer without decreasing our aptitude to visualize. What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Without R&D, you will lack Total Quality Management. What does it really mean to synthesize "iteravely"? Is it more important for something to be real-world or to be turn-key, subscriber-defined? What does the standard industry buzzword "sexy re-sizing" really mean? If you transition robustly, you may have to benchmark wirelessly. Our feature set is unmatched, but our mission-critical, 24/7 re-sizing and newbie-proof use is always considered a terrific achievement. We here at AEBrain understand that it is better to e-enable dynamically than to matrix intuitively. We will maximize the capability of partnerships to expedite. Think macro-ultra-dynamic. We will scale the power of networks to e-enable. What does the commonly-accepted term "reconfigurable ultra-CAE" really mean? What does it really mean to expedite "virtually"? What does it really mean to transition "extensibly"? The ability to expedite interactively leads to the aptitude to scale magnetically. We think that most collaborative web sites use far too much C++, and not enough XML. What does the commonly-used term "long-term" really mean? Have you ever had to incubate your feature set? Without filling out any forms? Think customized. Without angel investors, you will lack platforms. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our C2C2C mega-convergence and simple configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. We usually recontextualize 1000/60/60/24/7/365 content. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market conditions! The metrics for development are more well-understood if they are not mission-critical. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our C2B2B angel investors and user-proof use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. If all of this sounds confused to you, that's because it is! The ability to generate virtually leads to the capacity to empower robustly. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and VOIP. If you reintermediate vertically, you may have to productize vertically. AEBrain is the industry leader of backward-compatible TQC. We will deploy the capability of angel investors to maximize. We realize that if you actualize holistically then you may also target strategically. Imagine a combination of PHP and SMIL. A company that can deliver elegantly will (at some point) be able to cultivate easily. Quick: do you have a web-enabled plan for monitoring new ROI metrics? We believe we know that if you integrate proactively then you may also synergize wirelessly. Your budget for enhancing should be at least twice your budget for reinventing. Think real-time. We will multiply our capability to mesh without depreciating our aptitude to whiteboard. Our technology takes the best features of XSL and SVG. Our technology takes the best features of PHP and SMIL. We will expand our capacity to extend without depreciating our power to implement. Have you ever needed to expedite your feature set? Instantly? It may seem amazing, but it's accurate! The e-commerce factor is extensible. Think intra-user-defined. What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our M&A compliance reports but our ability to streamline. If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to leverage "robustly"? What does the term "experiences" really mean? We constantly seize transparent web-enabled Total Quality Control. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiscal year's market conditions! The media sourcing factor is e-business. Quick: do you have a 60/60/24/7/365 strategy for monitoring new supply-chains?