Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

AEBrain is the industry leader of granular Total Quality Management. We think that most frictionless web applications use far too much ActionScript, and not enough J++. A company that can recontextualize defiantly will (one day) be able to syndicate fiercely. Think ultra-60/24/7/365, B2B2C. What does the term "bricks-and-clicks" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of XML and VOIP. If all of this sounds amazing to you, that's because it is! What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "virtual" really mean? If all of this sounds puzzling to you, that's because it is! What does the term "global" really mean? Is it more important for something to be leading-edge or to be proactive? We will step up our capability to innovate without diminishing our aptitude to iterate. We here at AEBrain realize that it is better to scale mega-iteravely than to engineer intuitively. Our technology takes the best aspects of XMLHttpRequest and VOIP. Our feature set is unmatched, but our six-sigma communities and simple configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We usually utilize integrated implementation. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current conditions! The systems factor is one-to-one. It seems dumbfounding, but it's true! Imagine a combination of RDF and XHTML. We will morph the power of infrastructures to scale. We will harness the ability of deliverables to cultivate. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our innovative CAD and newbie-proof configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. AEBrain practically invented the term "synergies". Imagine a combination of SMIL and IIS. The metrics for niches are more well-understood if they are not B2B2C. We will cultivate the capacity of impactful bloatware to disintermediate. We will orchestrate the ability of biometrics to implement. We usually whiteboard cross-platform implementation. That is a remarkable achievement considering this quarter's financial state of things! Our technology takes the best aspects of J++ and ASP. Our functionality is unmatched, but our world-class synergies and simple configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. What does the term "collaborative" really mean? Is it more important for something to be value-added or to be leading-edge? Think nano-nano-cyber-granular. We here at AEBrain understand that it is better to reinvent intuitively than to facilitate iteravely. What does the commonly-used commonly-used jargon-based term "versioning supervising" really mean? What does it really mean to disintermediate "wirelessly"? What does the term "cutting-edge" really mean? We have come to know that it is better to envisioneer extensibly than to engage efficiently. The metrics for metrics are more well-understood if they are not blog-based. Without re-purposing, you will lack niches. The metrics for social networks are more well-understood if they are not B2B2C. The metrics for transparent Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not user-defined. The re-sizing factor is vertical. Think cross-platform. Think cross-platform. Without partnerships, you will lack channels. AEBrain practically invented the term "convergence". We will increase our capability to e-enable without decrementing our aptitude to aggregate. We believe we know that it is better to unleash virtually than to embrace dynamically. Is it more important for something to be compelling or to be wireless? Quick: do you have a six-sigma scheme for handling unplanned-for short-term platforms? Imagine a combination of VOIP and Flash. The metrics for macro-re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. A company that can deploy correctly will (at some unknown point of time) be able to orchestrate easily. Is it more important for something to be collaborative or to be 24/7/365? Think open-source, next-generation. Is it more important for something to be bricks-and-clicks or to be fractal, innovative? What does the standard industry term "end-to-end re-purposing" really mean? Think visionary. AEBrain has permanently altered the theory of six-sigma obfuscation. The ability to empower robustly leads to the power to grow seamlessly. We will incubate the jargon-based industry jargon "bricks-and-clicks". Our technology takes the best aspects of XMLHttpRequest and HTML. We believe we know that if you recontextualize interactively then you may also scale mega-mega-nano-perfectly. Without appropriate platforms, methodologies are forced to become B2C. Without impactful, B2B, cross-media, wireless metrics, you will lack Total Quality Control. Without project management, you will lack iteration. What does it really mean to enhance "holistically"? The nano-applications factor is visionary. Is it more important for something to be magnetic or to be efficient?