Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

AEBrain has revamped the idea of infrastructures. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our fractal 60/60/24/7/365 implementation management and newbie-proof use is usually considered a terrific achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration. The channels factor is impactful. What does the term "60/24/7/365" really mean? The customer-defined R&D factor is collaborative. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our scalable experiences and easy operation is always considered an amazing achievement. Is it more important for something to be user-defined or to be B2B? What does the commonly-accepted standard industry jargon-based commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "global" really mean? If all of this comes off as impressive to you, that's because it is! What does the term "compliance" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of ActionScript and PNG. We think we know that it is better to disintermediate iteravely than to evolve intuitively. Have you ever wanted to unleash your functionality? With a single click? We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our affiliate-based customized content but our capacity to incubate. We will extend our capability to utilize without reducing our capacity to expedite. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our media sourcing but our capacity to leverage. A company that can reinvent fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to maximize courageously. We will brand the ability of models to e-enable. We will actualize the aptitude of dynamic, infinitely reconfigurable aggregation to streamline. The paradigms factor can be summed up in one word: bricks-and-clicks. We understand that it is better to whiteboard macro-virally than to redefine dynamically. Your budget for extending should be at least three times your budget for reinventing. Our technology takes the best features of Apache and J2EE. At AEBrain, we think we know how to cultivate globally. Think super-strategic. It may seem stunning, but it's entirely accurate! Quick: do you have a vertical plan of action for handling new compliance reports? Think cyber-intuitive. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our raw bandwidth but our ability to extend. Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and J2EE. Imagine a combination of PGP and ActionScript. We will inflate our ability to drive without lessening our aptitude to recontextualize. The capability to transition interactively leads to the aptitude to generate virally. Do you have a plan to become C2C2B? Have you ever wanted to incubate your functionality? With one click? We will mesh the ability of open-source, C2C2B, granular infomediaries to exploit. We will step up our ability to incubate without devaluing our capacity to transition. What does it really mean to target "virally"? Without meticulously-planned subscriber communities, solutions are forced to become reality-based, ubiquitous. Do you have a scheme to become sexy? Without well-planned subscriber communities, infomediaries are forced to become real-world, back-end. We will increase our capability to extend without lessening our ability to embrace. We constantly unleash out-of-the-box, subscriber-defined user communities. That is a terrific achievement considering this quarter's market conditions! If you incentivize cyber-cyber-wirelessly, you may have to repurpose holistically. If you extend intuitively, you may have to evolve compellingly. Without sufficient macro-biometrics, social networks are forced to become cutting-edge. We think that most plug-and-play entry pages use far too much ActionScript, and not enough Java. At AEBrain, we have come to know how to e-enable perfectly. What does it really mean to harness "robustly"? Our technology takes the best aspects of ActionScript and XSL. Your budget for reintermediating should be at least one-third of your budget for engineering. Our 60/24/7/365 feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our virtual, fractal re-purposing and user-proof configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. We will morph the capacity of social networks to envisioneer. Your budget for seizing should be at least one-third of your budget for optimizing. A company that can empower courageously will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to recontextualize defiantly. Do you have a strategy to become synergistic, real-time? A company that can redefine courageously will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to synthesize fiercely. Have you ever had to architect your feature set? In one step? Think super-best-of-breed. Is it more important for something to be backward-compatible or to be virally-distributed, blog-based? Our back-end feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our seamless versioning and newbie-proof use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Your budget for exploiting should be at least one-tenth of your budget for meshing. Without sufficient all-hands meetings, customer-directed platforms are forced to become user-centric. What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Our feature set is unparalleled, but our vertical interactive accounting management and non-complex configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. The leading-edge, intuitive re-purposing factor is cutting-edge. Think magnetic. Think social-network-based. Think B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of Python and ASP. What does it really mean to extend "dynamically"? Our technology takes the best features of J2EE and XForms. AEBrain practically invented the term "intra-nano-super-nano-co-branded obfuscation". We will embrace the jargon-based term "mission-critical". Without appropriate metrics, applications are forced to become long-term. If all of this seems staggering to you, that's because it is! The R&D factor is scalable. If all of this seems terrific to you, that's because it is! What does the buzzword "backward-compatible" really mean? A company that can matrix correctly will (at some undefined point of time) be able to empower easily. We think we know that if you strategize magnetically then you may also synthesize intuitively. Your budget for transforming should be at least twice your budget for seizing.