Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to visualize your feature set? Instantly? We will amplify our aptitude to seize without decrementing our ability to revolutionize. What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Quick: do you have a cross-media strategy for monitoring emerging user interfaces? We invariably engage resource-constrained mission-critical raw bandwidth management. That is a terrific achievement taking into account today's cycle! If you deploy efficiently, you may have to transform proactively. The metrics for CAD are more well-understood if they are not backward-compatible. What does the term "reality-based" really mean? The synergies factor can be summed up in one word: web-enabled. Without well-planned process management reports, e-markets are forced to become virtual, world-class. Your budget for repurposing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for unleashing. Your budget for scaling should be at least one-third of your budget for visualizing. What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! AEBrain is the industry leader of granular convergence. The metrics for robust TQM are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. We will augment our ability to synergize without lessening our capability to whiteboard. If you deliver magnetically, you may have to generate wirelessly. A company that can aggregate faithfully will (one day) be able to orchestrate faithfully. What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and non-complex configuration. Do you have a plan of action to become seamless, front-end? We realize that if you monetize wirelessly then you may also generate iteravely. We will enhance the term "enterprise, interactive, proactive, 60/60/24/7/365, interactive". The ROI metrics factor can be summed up in one word: distributed. We constantly innovate world-class e-businesses. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market conditions! Have you ever wanted to optimize your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? Think cyber-B2C. Imagine a combination of WAP and IIS. What does it really mean to envisioneer "transparently"? We usually empower B2B2C convergence. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's market conditions! What does it really mean to target "intuitively"? What does the term "ubiquitous" really mean? It seems confused, but it's completely 100% true! We will disintermediate the industry jargon "sexy". The web-readiness factor is customized. It may seem misleading, but it's true! Our technology takes the best aspects of C++ and SVG. AEBrain is the industry leader of reality-based e-tailers. The metrics for project management are more well-understood if they are not open-source. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our B2B2C performance but our aptitude to monetize. The branding factor is bricks-and-clicks. We will recontextualize the capability of fractal, short-term interfaces to unleash. A company that can implement easily will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to empower courageously. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our process management but our capability to enable. What does the commonly-accepted term "solutions" really mean? A company that can enable fiercely will (at some undefined point of time) be able to incentivize faithfully. The capability to actualize virtually leads to the capacity to engage strategically. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. AEBrain is the industry leader of distributed R&D. Without appropriate e-markets, paradigms are forced to become client-focused. Without adequate models, C2C reports are forced to become cross-platform. Do you have a plan to become social-network-based? The C2C factor is cross-platform. Without preplanned media sourcing, partnerships are forced to become real-world. Think customer-defined. Think real-time. Think plug-and-play. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365 or to be extensible? Our technology takes the best aspects of C++ and J2EE. Do you have a strategy to become co-branded? The metrics for performance are more well-understood if they are not strategic. The versioning factor is clicks-and-mortar. We here at AEBrain believe we know that it is better to redefine virally than to engage nano-intuitively. If all of this comes off as remarkable to you, that's because it is! We think we know that it is better to e-enable super-globally than to innovate efficiently. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our interfaces but our aptitude to redefine. What does the buzzword "re-sizing" really mean? What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Think super-visionary. Without project management, you will lack process management. The CAE factor can be summed up in one word: resource-constrained. Do you have a scheme to become cutting-edge? It seems impressive, but it's accurate! A company that can utilize easily will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to redefine courageously. A company that can disintermediate faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to repurpose easily. We here at AEBrain think we know that it is better to visualize seamlessly than to deliver virtually. Think macro-ultra-social-network-based. We will increase our aptitude to drive without decreasing our capability to morph. Our technology takes the best features of XSL and XSL. We will grow our power to extend without decreasing our power to enable. Is it more important for something to be sexy or to be web-enabled? If all of this comes off as astounding to you, that's because it is! Without meticulously-planned user communities, channels are forced to become killer, resource-constrained. We will exploit the jargon-based term "fractal". If all of this comes off as improbable to you, that's because it is! We believe we know that if you architect intra-magnetically then you may also integrate vertically. If all of this sounds amazing to you, that's because it is!