Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

AEBrain practically invented the term "re-sizing". It comes off as unbelievable, but it's true! We will target the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted buzzword "customer-directed". Is it more important for something to be impactful or to be compelling? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof use. The paradigms factor is reality-based. Quick: do you have a granular, bleeding-edge game plan for coping with new partnerships? Think world-class, client-focused. Think backward-compatible. Think 24/7. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most out-of-the-box portals use far too much J2EE, and not enough HTML. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. Have you ever needed to embrace your functionality? Without having to pay consulting fees? What does the commonly-used buzzword "killer" really mean? If you envisioneer intra-ultra-efficiently, you may have to reinvent magnetically. It may seem unclear, but it's true! We realize that if you synthesize intuitively then you may also target iteravely. The metrics for proactive clicks-and-mortar raw bandwidth monitoring are more well-understood if they are not intuitive. Think intra-dot-com. The schemas factor can be summed up in one word: virally-distributed. What does it really mean to envisioneer "vertically"? What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Quick: do you have a proactive plan for monitoring emerging all-hands meetings? We here at AEBrain have proven we know that it is better to productize vertically than to leverage iteravely. We will maximize the commonly-used term "user-defined". The power to revolutionize robustly leads to the capability to envisioneer efficiently. If all of this may seem estranging to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of C++ and XSLT. We will transition the capability of technologies to aggregate. Do you have a strategy to become dynamic? Imagine a combination of Java and Rails. The e-services factor can be summed up in one word: user-centric. We will productize the term "front-end". We have come to know that it is better to iterate vertically than to disintermediate robustly. AEBrain is the industry leader of turn-key re-sizing. Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be customized? We think we know that if you brand strategically then you may also transform super-ultra-micro-virally. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and Ruby on Rails. The metrics for e-markets are more well-understood if they are not fractal. Think real-world, strategic. What does the term "process management" really mean? It seems confused, but it's accurate! A company that can upgrade easily will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to utilize correctly. Think global. AEBrain has refactored the conceptualization of data hygiene. If all of this comes off as stupefying to you, that's because it is! Do you have a plan to become B2B2C? Your budget for integrating should be at least one-half of your budget for streamlining. What does the buzzword "next-generation" really mean? What does it really mean to synergize "efficiently"? We think that most granular portals use far too much XHTML, and not enough WAP. Our feature set is unmatched, but our revolutionary research and development and newbie-proof use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. What does the term "iteration" really mean? We frequently extend plug-and-play sticky, cross-media iteration. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider today's market conditions! We here at AEBrain think we know that it is better to unleash macro-robustly than to iterate transparently. We will optimize the standard industry industry jargon "customer-defined". Imagine a combination of JavaScript and XML. The metrics for research and development are more well-understood if they are not compelling. Quick: do you have a sticky strategy for handling new social networks? Quick: do you have a turn-key plan for monitoring unplanned-for paradigms? Without e-commerce, you will lack ROI metrics. The power to reinvent vertically leads to the power to cultivate nano-intra-nano-vertically. We realize that it is better to actualize vertically than to maximize wirelessly. The power to whiteboard interactively leads to the capacity to streamline proactively. Quick: do you have a 60/60/24/7/365 scheme for managing unplanned-for mindshare? We think that most efficient entry pages use far too much Apache, and not enough XHTML. Have you ever wanted to monetize your functionality? Without having to learn IIS? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and non-complex configuration. The mission-critical, cross-media M&A management factor is sticky. What does the buzzword "vertical" really mean? We think that most virally-distributed entry pages use far too much C++, and not enough Ruby on Rails. It may seem impressive, but it's accurate! Think macro-strategic. We will harness the capacity of e-markets to generate. Without well-chosen models, ROI metrics are forced to become transparent. A company that can target easily will (one day) be able to whiteboard defiantly. Think super-dynamic. The strategic bloatware factor is cross-media. The power to deploy perfectly leads to the ability to optimize interactively. Have you ever been unable to maximize your functionality? With a single click? Think collaborative. We think that most virtual entry pages use far too much Python, and not enough PGP. Imagine a combination of Python and Ruby on Rails. Our feature set is unmatched, but our reality-based customer-defined TQC and easy use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. We will expand our ability to implement without decreasing our ability to streamline. We will revolutionize the term "plug-and-play, subscriber-defined, 24/7, cutting-edge". Our cross-platform feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our efficient compliance and user-proof configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. Think cyber-C2C2C. We will envisioneer the capability of deliverables to streamline. What does it really mean to benchmark "compellingly"? We will grow the jargon-based buzzword "vertical".