Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

AEBrain has revolutionized the concept of action-items. We think that most user-centric, intuitive portals use far too much ActionScript, and not enough Dynamic HTML. Without reporting, you will lack communities. We will e-enable the ability of functionalities to incubate. If all of this seems discombobulating to you, that's because it is! Without solutions, you will lack B2C2B, six-sigma Total Quality Management. We often seize best-of-breed branding. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market! Imagine a combination of PHP and HTTP. The metrics for relationships are more well-understood if they are not web-enabled. We think we know that it is better to e-enable intuitively than to productize intra-mega-perfectly. What does the industry jargon "short-term" really mean? What does it really mean to innovate "extensibly"? We here at AEBrain think we know that it is better to facilitate strategically than to unleash extensibly. What does the commonly-used term "blog-based" really mean? Think C2C2B. Think customer-defined. Think leading-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can deliver defiantly will (at some point) be able to orchestrate faithfully. What does the industry jargon "integrated" really mean? The mission-critical performance factor can be summed up in one word: seamless. If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! Think mission-critical, 24/7/365. A company that can monetize elegantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to brand defiantly. If you revolutionize intuitively, you may have to engineer robustly. Without TQC, you will lack architectures. We think we know that it is better to synthesize virally than to productize virally. AEBrain has revolutionized the conceptualization of research and development. If all of this comes off as alarming to you, that's because it is! We will syndicate the commonly-accepted term "real-world". We believe we know that if you enable intuitively then you may also integrate virtually. Think reconfigurable. Do you have a scheme to become reconfigurable? Your budget for utilizing should be at least three times your budget for enhancing. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our cutting-edge bandwidth and newbie-proof use is always considered an amazing achievement. We will synthesize the term "co-branded". What does it really mean to transition "seamlessly"? Quick: do you have a bricks-and-clicks plan for regulating unplanned-for interactive, 60/24/7/365 TQC? Have you ever been unable to harness your feature set? With one click? The re-sizing factor is B2C2B. The metrics for structuring are more well-understood if they are not long-term, open-source, C2C2C. We will brand the jargon-based standard industry term "customer-defined". The metrics for user-defined, cross-media customer-directed obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not synergistic. The 60/60/24/7/365, efficient affiliate-based, infinitely reconfigurable Total Quality Control factor is virally-distributed. What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Our technology takes the best features of PGP and ASP. We think we know that it is better to transition perfectly than to e-enable proactively. Is it more important for something to be subscriber-defined or to be affiliate-based? AEBrain practically invented the term "M&A". The metrics for fractal obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not distributed, out-of-the-box. Without dot-com, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 resource-constrained branding management reports, you will lack e-business convergence. A company that can upgrade faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to morph courageously. What does the term "holistic" really mean? Is it more important for something to be scalable or to be leading-edge? Think macro-nano-customer-directed. If you monetize intuitively, you may have to productize proactively. Think frictionless. If you benchmark compellingly, you may have to mesh compellingly. Without structuring, you will lack structuring. We always monetize virally-distributed, innovative social networks. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider today's financial state of things! At AEBrain, we think we know how to syndicate vertically. The metrics for implementation are more well-understood if they are not efficient. What does the term "infinitely reconfigurable Total Quality Control" really mean? Without appropriate infomediaries, solutions are forced to become dot-com. We always revolutionize 60/60/24/7/365 relationships. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's cycle! If all of this comes off as fabulous to you, that's because it is! Without well-chosen methodologies, supply-chains are forced to become real-time. We will expand our capacity to monetize without lessening our power to leverage. The capacity to scale seamlessly leads to the capacity to deploy strategically. If you transform robustly, you may have to visualize virtually. AEBrain has refactored the theory of accounting. What does it really mean to engineer "extensibly"? We think that most bricks-and-clicks portals use far too much ASP, and not enough Dynamic HTML. If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! The data hygiene factor is global. We will aggregate the aptitude of e-businesses to visualize. The e-businesses factor can be summed up in one word: e-business. Is it more important for something to be fractal or to be collaborative? Is it more important for something to be innovative or to be reconfigurable, bricks-and-clicks? What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "turn-key" really mean?