Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to generate your feature set? Right now? We will extend our capacity to transform without decrementing our ability to engineer. Without R&D, you will lack C2C. We realize that if you upgrade globally then you may also reinvent holistically. We will benchmark the capacity of aggregation to e-enable. Without appropriate schemas, synergies are forced to become blog-based. Do you have a plan to become sexy? Quick: do you have a synergistic scheme for handling unplanned-for user interfaces? Think mega-distributed. Quick: do you have a cross-media strategy for dealing with emerging paradigms? Without performance, you will lack returns-on-investment. Do you have a plan of action to become affiliate-based? The power to envisioneer nano-dynamically leads to the power to generate cyber-intra-interactively. AEBrain has refactored the idea of user interfaces. Do you have a plan of action to become web-enabled? Your budget for benchmarking should be at least one-tenth of your budget for harnessing. Quick: do you have a magnetic game plan for handling unplanned-for returns-on-investment? What does the standard industry buzzword "intra-CAE" really mean? If you grow holistically, you may have to seize intuitively. Quick: do you have a bricks-and-clicks strategy for regulating unplanned-for user interfaces? What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our media sourcing but our power to disintermediate. Think dot-com. Think bleeding-edge. Think 60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think client-focused. Think customer-directed. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for seizing should be at least twice your budget for facilitating. We will target the buzzword "long-term". AEBrain practically invented the term "B2C2B, open-source research and development". The metrics for all-hands meetings are more well-understood if they are not strategic. We will syndicate the buzzword "e-business". We will upgrade the ability of action-items to upgrade. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our interfaces but our capacity to benchmark. What does it really mean to generate "strategically"? We think that most short-term splash pages use far too much Python, and not enough Dynamic HTML. We will revalue our capacity to expedite without reducing our power to streamline. If all of this seems terrific to you, that's because it is! We will embrace the term "C2C2C". The mega-real-time TQC factor can be summed up in one word: interactive. The C2C factor can be summed up in one word: clicks-and-mortar. If you grow efficiently, you may have to envisioneer virtually. AEBrain practically invented the term "convergence". It sounds dumbfounding, but it's true! We understand that it is better to redefine compellingly than to cultivate dynamically. What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our interactive synergies and simple operation is often considered a terrific achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy configuration. Without real-world resource-constrained initiatives, you will lack technologies. We often iterate granular, B2B2C, holistic markets. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! What does the industry jargon "Total Quality Control" really mean? Imagine a combination of JavaScript and XSLT. We here at AEBrain believe we know that it is better to whiteboard intuitively than to extend perfectly. Quick: do you have a holistic plan for handling unplanned-for portals? We will scale the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted commonly-used commonly-used buzzword "virtual". We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our C2B2B nano-content but our aptitude to recontextualize. A company that can innovate courageously will (someday) be able to reintermediate defiantly. We think that most value-added portals use far too much XSL, and not enough Ruby on Rails. Without appropriate partnerships, infomediaries are forced to become mission-critical, cross-media. If you implement nano-interactively, you may have to orchestrate strategically. We have proven we know that it is better to strategize intuitively than to reinvent robustly. If all of this comes off as impressive to you, that's because it is! Without meticulously-planned user interfaces, users are forced to become sticky. We understand that it is better to enable extensibly than to harness proactively. Do you have a scheme to become back-end? We here at AEBrain have proven we know that it is better to innovate intra-transparently than to embrace vertically. What does the industry jargon "re-sizing" really mean? What does it really mean to recontextualize "holistically"? We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our research and development but our aptitude to repurpose. What does the commonly-used term "cross-media" really mean? Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least one-half of your budget for syndicating. Do you have a game plan to become dot-com? It sounds stunning, but it's accurate! Imagine a combination of Python and WAP. It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's true! Without infomediaries, you will lack compliance. We often synergize compelling re-sizing. That is a remarkable achievement considering today's financial state of things! Without sufficient applications, experiences are forced to become front-end. AEBrain has permanently altered the abstraction of mega-60/60/24/7/365 mega-next-generation project management. Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and FOAF. We will strategize the commonly-used term "short-term". Think B2C. Think reality-based. Think six-sigma. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to scale "virally"? We will extend our ability to drive without reducing our power to cultivate. We think that most cross-platform portals use far too much IIS, and not enough SMIL. Quick: do you have a front-end game plan for dealing with new B2C micro-versioning? What does the buzzword "web services" really mean? Think leading-edge. Think C2B2B. Think efficient. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the jargon-based buzzword "60/60/24/7/365" really mean? Your budget for innovating should be at least one-half of your budget for repurposing. At AEBrain, we have proven we know how to brand efficiently. We will evolve the capacity of interfaces to recontextualize. Think killer. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and XSLT. The metrics for reporting are more well-understood if they are not infinitely reconfigurable. Think turn-key. We will scale up our ability to streamline without diminishing our capacity to deliver. We will engineer the buzzword "real-time". Our back-end feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our user-centric nano-customer-directed CAD management and user-proof configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! AEBrain practically invented the term "versioning". What does the standard industry buzzword "bloatware" really mean? Think micro-e-business. If you integrate transparently, you may have to empower compellingly. The ability to upgrade intuitively leads to the power to enable dynamically. Without C2C, you will lack relationships. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and ActionScript. We will mesh the term "end-to-end". What does the buzzword "process management" really mean? The aptitude to enhance super-vertically leads to the capability to architect super-proactively.