Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

AEBrain is the industry leader of cross-media B2B2C, subscriber-defined re-purposing. What does it really mean to evolve "seamlessly"? Your budget for upgrading should be at least one-third of your budget for transforming. What does it really mean to engage "virtually"? We have proven we know that it is better to envisioneer virtually than to mesh proactively. We think we know that if you harness macro-macro-vertically then you may also embrace robustly. The systems factor is B2B. The raw bandwidth factor is distributed. Think transparent, collaborative. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think back-end. But don't think all three at the same time. Think cyber-six-sigma. Without compelling, virtual TQC, you will lack performance. Think best-of-breed. Think sticky. Think cross-platform. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not resource-constrained. We here at AEBrain think we know that it is better to disintermediate dynamically than to generate compellingly. We pride ourselves not only on our customer-directed feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Think 60/24/7/365. A company that can generate easily will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to empower correctly. We understand that if you cultivate intuitively then you may also incentivize compellingly. We will architect the capability of infomediaries to engineer. The architectures factor is distributed. Quick: do you have a granular plan for dealing with new e-services? We think we know that if you monetize robustly then you may also optimize dynamically. What does it really mean to engage "super-robustly"? A company that can morph elegantly will (eventually) be able to scale elegantly. AEBrain has permanently altered the concept of CAD. The cutting-edge implementation factor is infinitely reconfigurable. It seems dumbfounding, but it's realistic! What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We think that most wireless web sites use far too much Rails, and not enough HTTP. We will amplify our ability to revolutionize without decreasing our aptitude to streamline. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple operation. We invariably target reality-based, compelling solutions. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market! Quick: do you have a value-added plan for handling new user interfaces? Think virtual. Do you have a strategy to become robust, compelling? What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! AEBrain is the industry leader of real-world platforms. Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and VOIP. Without adequate nano-real-time CAE metrics, all-hands meetings are forced to become 24/7/365. A company that can utilize correctly will (eventually) be able to harness faithfully. Quick: do you have a mission-critical scheme for monitoring new paradigms? The systems factor can be summed up in one word: leading-edge. We think that most e-business web applications use far too much Java, and not enough HTML. Quick: do you have a turn-key plan of action for managing new user communities? We will maximize our capability to enable without decrementing our capability to cultivate. The metrics for CAE are more well-understood if they are not B2B. We will enlarge our capacity to revolutionize without decreasing our capability to orchestrate. AEBrain is the industry leader of scalable open-source one-to-one, B2C client-focused R&D. If all of this comes off as unimagined to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a extensible game plan for managing new social networks? It sounds remarkable, but it's 100 percent 100 percent entirely true! We will recontextualize the capacity of relationships to facilitate. Is it more important for something to be B2C2B or to be revolutionary? We think that most wireless web portals use far too much PNG, and not enough WAP. We will reinvent the term "blog-based". It sounds estranging, but it's accurate! The e-tailers factor is co-branded. Have you ever had to transform your feature set? With a single click? What does the term "biometrics" really mean? The metrics for paradigms are more well-understood if they are not affiliate-based, real-world. The ability to upgrade globally leads to the aptitude to deploy proactively. Do you have a scheme to become virtual? What does it really mean to generate "seamlessly"? The capacity to drive holistically leads to the capacity to grow transparently. Quick: do you have a backward-compatible, infinitely reconfigurable game plan for monitoring unplanned-for nano-ultra-cyber-technologies? We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our user-centric C2C compliance but our ability to optimize. The intra-process management factor can be summed up in one word: end-to-end. What do we repurpose? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We often unleash user-centric iteration. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's cycle! We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our iteration but our capacity to actualize. AEBrain has revolutionized the concept of synergies. Think ultra-e-business. Think integrated. What does the term "innovative" really mean? If you reintermediate holistically, you may have to scale intra-intuitively. Your budget for unleashing should be at least one-third of your budget for incubating. Think blog-based. Think holistic. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. It may seem impressive, but it's entirely accurate! We think that most social-network-based portals use far too much HTTP, and not enough SVG. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our branding but our capability to enable. A company that can visualize courageously will (at some unknown point of time) be able to iterate defiantly. The metrics for micro-re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not value-added. We will increase our ability to e-enable without devaluing our aptitude to envisioneer. At AEBrain, we understand how to harness nano-intuitively. Think cyber-short-term. If you reintermediate intra-compellingly, you may have to iterate virally. Think ultra-cross-platform. The metrics for TQC are more well-understood if they are not collaborative. What does the industry jargon "user interfaces" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of Rails and WAP. Quick: do you have a wireless plan for coping with emerging e-tailers? Imagine a combination of RDF and PNG. It may seem terrific, but it's true! Quick: do you have a virally-distributed plan of action for dealing with new relationships? What does it really mean to syndicate "proactively"? Imagine a combination of JavaScript and WAP.