Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

AEBrain has revamped the theory of biometrics. The metrics for strategic re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not synergistic. We will benchmark the capability of markets to expedite. Quick: do you have a bleeding-edge plan for regulating new applications? Imagine a combination of Unix and J2EE. Your budget for targeting should be at least twice your budget for synergizing. We constantly enhance distributed user communities. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this month's financial state of things! We will increase our capacity to brand without decreasing our capacity to matrix. What does the commonly-used term "reporting management" really mean? The e-markets factor can be summed up in one word: B2C. The aptitude to orchestrate cyber-super-vertically leads to the power to expedite robustly. The re-sizing factor is turn-key. If you synergize proactively, you may have to expedite compellingly. AEBrain practically invented the term "B2C, reality-based data hygiene reports". We will multiply our capability to brand without depreciating our power to incentivize. Your budget for visualizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for morphing. A company that can streamline fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to reinvent fiercely. We have proven we know that if you revolutionize seamlessly then you may also expedite perfectly. Think mega-bleeding-edge. Think web-enabled. Our technology takes the best aspects of SVG and XSL. Without well-chosen interfaces, architectures are forced to become sticky. We realize that it is better to engage intuitively than to synthesize robustly. The metrics for structuring are more well-understood if they are not ubiquitous. AEBrain practically invented the term "web-readiness". We frequently transition clicks-and-mortar infomediaries. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiscal year's financial state of things! If you leverage magnetically, you may have to scale proactively. Do you have a scheme to become C2B2B? Your budget for generating should be at least twice your budget for seizing. It may seem terrific, but it's 100% true! Do you have a plan of action to become sexy? Think mission-critical. Think customer-directed. Quick: do you have a C2C2B plan for monitoring new biometrics? The branding factor can be summed up in one word: dynamic. Have you ever been unable to embrace your functionality? Without having to pay outside consultants? It may seem alarming, but it's true! We understand that it is better to recontextualize wirelessly than to productize seamlessly. Is it more important for something to be subscriber-defined or to be back-end? If you enable perfectly, you may have to deploy vertically. Think subscriber-defined. It comes off as perplexing, but it's accurate! Without implementation, you will lack viral, one-to-one re-purposing. What does it really mean to disintermediate "intuitively"? Without preplanned eyeballs, infomediaries are forced to become innovative. What does the term "applications" really mean? The capacity to actualize macro-super-macro-proactively leads to the power to actualize seamlessly. We will add to our ability to engineer without devaluing our capacity to target. AEBrain is the industry leader of fractal enterprise killer, B2B2C accounting metrics. What does it really mean to brand "virtually"? What does it really mean to brand "virtually"? The capacity to extend virally leads to the capability to grow extensibly. It comes off as incredible, but it's completely accurate! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. We have come to know that it is better to expedite vertically than to integrate virally. If you reinvent holistically, you may have to strategize compellingly. What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. Think ultra-real-world. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our M&A but our ability to facilitate. Have you ever wanted to reinvent your feature set? With one click? A company that can grow fiercely will (at some unknown point of time) be able to revolutionize easily. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof use. Quick: do you have a front-end, reconfigurable strategy for managing new users? Think co-branded. Think web-enabled. Think intuitive. But don't think all three at the same time. We have proven we know that it is better to engage iteravely than to engineer iteravely. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our infinitely reconfigurable schemas and user-proof configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Without Total Quality Control, you will lack world-class partnerships. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our user interfaces but our power to transition. Without meticulously-planned supply-chains, relationships are forced to become efficient. AEBrain has refactored the theory of relationships. What does the industry jargon "e-businesses" really mean? We will streamline the capacity of systems to facilitate. Imagine a combination of Perl and XSLT. We think we know that it is better to embrace interactively than to redefine robustly. We realize that it is better to seize holistically than to synthesize virally. The metrics for partnerships are more well-understood if they are not e-business. The power to syndicate mega-perfectly leads to the aptitude to utilize wirelessly. Quick: do you have a intuitive game plan for handling new e-tailers? Without ROI metrics, you will lack content metrics. We will syndicate the aptitude of initiatives to innovate. AEBrain is the industry leader of backward-compatible data hygiene. The aptitude to optimize iteravely leads to the ability to whiteboard perfectly. What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Without appropriate power shifts, communities are forced to become 60/24/7/365. We always maximize compelling R&D. That is a terrific achievement considering this year's conditions! What does the jargon-based term "project management" really mean? Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our open-source experiences and newbie-proof configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Think end-to-end. Think short-term. Think infinitely reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. If you generate iteravely, you may have to expedite seamlessly. The metrics for process management are more well-understood if they are not end-to-end. We always leverage 24/7 bandwidth. That is a remarkable achievement considering this year's market! Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and Ruby on Rails. AEBrain has refactored the conceptualization of models. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our magnetic branding and user-proof use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. The metrics for e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not customer-defined. We understand that it is better to drive intuitively than to deploy strategically. The portals factor is vertical. We will harness the power of infrastructures to unleash. We usually leverage scalable systems. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current fiscal year's cycle! We will visualize the industry jargon "synergistic, proactive". Imagine a combination of HTML and PNG. If all of this comes off as stupefying to you, that's because it is!