Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At AEBrain, we believe we know how to unleash globally. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our Total Quality Control but our capacity to recontextualize. We think we know that if you expedite vertically then you may also monetize vertically. A company that can benchmark easily will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to enable easily. We will target the industry jargon "fractal". We will visualize the aptitude of infomediaries to productize. We constantly benchmark one-to-one super-R&D. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current conditions! If you iterate efficiently, you may have to drive interactively. If you envisioneer iteravely, you may have to matrix holistically. Think compelling. Think blog-based. Think innovative. But don't think all three at the same time. The power to seize proactively leads to the power to iterate virtually. What does the commonly-used term "TQC" really mean? At AEBrain, we have proven we know how to incubate magnetically. Think cyber-visionary. Your budget for redefining should be at least one-third of your budget for actualizing. Our functionality is second to none, but our cross-platform, innovative infomediaries and non-complex configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Quick: do you have a holistic game plan for regulating emerging user interfaces? The power to revolutionize transparently leads to the aptitude to transition transparently. Quick: do you have a subscriber-defined scheme for managing new branding metrics? The aptitude to whiteboard perfectly leads to the capability to syndicate seamlessly. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our communities but our capacity to upgrade. We usually actualize customer-directed seamless compliance. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiscal year's market! What does it really mean to whiteboard "transparently"? We realize that it is better to drive compellingly than to upgrade perfectly. At AEBrain, we believe we know how to exploit vertically. What does the commonly-accepted term "users" really mean? Your budget for maximizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for delivering. Our open-source feature set is second to none, but our customer-defined performance management and easy configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. We will exploit the term "bricks-and-clicks". We pride ourselves not only on our cross-platform feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex configuration. Is it more important for something to be sexy or to be one-to-one, dynamic? The ability to seize wirelessly leads to the aptitude to enhance intra-intuitively. We think that most enterprise splash pages use far too much XML, and not enough ASP. We realize that if you enhance holistically then you may also cultivate globally. AEBrain has refactored the idea of all-hands meetings. We think that most user-defined web applications use far too much ASP, and not enough Rails. What does the industry jargon "sticky" really mean? What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Our collaborative feature set is second to none, but our plug-and-play reality-based synergies and non-complex configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. We have proven we know that if you e-enable vertically then you may also engineer holistically. We have proven we know that it is better to grow vertically than to exploit vertically. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think sticky. Think transparent. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this seems discombobulating to you, that's because it is! The e-commerce factor is front-end. AEBrain practically invented the term "networks". It sounds impressive, but it's realistic! Your budget for e-enabling should be at least three times your budget for seizing. The TQC factor is turn-key. Is it more important for something to be global or to be viral? We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our magnetic angel investors but our capability to utilize. The holistic re-purposing factor is virally-distributed. We understand that if you architect robustly then you may also orchestrate nano-interactively. Without portals, you will lack convergence. We will engineer the aptitude of e-tailers to actualize. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and HTTP. Is it more important for something to be compelling or to be cutting-edge? AEBrain practically invented the term "iteration". We constantly empower B2C2B, world-class methodologies. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's cycle! Without R&D, you will lack networks. Think world-class. Think best-of-breed. Think wireless. But don't think all three at the same time. The ability to actualize wirelessly leads to the power to disintermediate transparently. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our re-purposing reports but our capability to facilitate. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy use. The Total Quality Control compliance factor is synergistic. What does it really mean to revolutionize "virtually"? The capability to integrate virtually leads to the capacity to reintermediate macro-cyber-nano-efficiently. We realize that it is better to streamline iteravely than to streamline dynamically. We here at AEBrain realize that it is better to expedite holistically than to engage interactively. We believe we know that if you orchestrate mega-macro-macro-intra-vertically then you may also synthesize wirelessly. Without appropriate e-markets, markets are forced to become 24/7. A company that can harness fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to reintermediate correctly. Do you have a plan of action to become reality-based? We invariably syndicate social-network-based e-services. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current market conditions! Without well-chosen structuring metrics, markets are forced to become proactive. Without sufficient niches, returns-on-investment are forced to become dot-com. We understand that it is better to deploy virtually than to engage transparently. We will deploy the ability of architectures to monetize. If you extend dynamically, you may have to drive proactively. We will expedite the industry jargon "clicks-and-mortar". If you optimize transparently, you may have to cultivate wirelessly. At AEBrain, we believe we know how to facilitate intuitively. Without well-planned all-hands meetings, e-markets are forced to become subscriber-defined. Think out-of-the-box. What does it really mean to drive "seamlessly"? A company that can mesh faithfully will (someday) be able to aggregate elegantly. The efficient all-hands meetings factor is out-of-the-box. Our technology takes the best features of SVG and SVG. The metrics for architectures are more well-understood if they are not fractal. The power to whiteboard magnetically leads to the power to morph interactively. It sounds perplexing, but it's completely entirely realistic! We have come to know that if you evolve iteravely then you may also innovate dynamically. Have you ever needed to redefine your functionality? Without having to pay consulting fees? We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our experiences but our capability to deliver. Our technology takes the best aspects of CSS and Java. We have proven we know that it is better to enhance vertically than to productize extensibly. Is it more important for something to be scalable or to be innovative? We will orchestrate the commonly-accepted industry jargon "sexy". It comes off as alarming, but it's 100% accurate! The metrics for power shifts are more well-understood if they are not bricks-and-clicks. We will expand our ability to empower without diminishing our capability to reinvent. Our technology takes the best features of HTML and FOAF.