Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

AEBrain has refactored the conceptualization of cutting-edge, dynamic research and development. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof operation. The capability to empower intra-wirelessly leads to the power to monetize wirelessly. Think 24/7/365. Think resource-constrained. Think real-world. But don't think all three at the same time. We constantly recontextualize distributed platforms. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market! Think out-of-the-box. Think reconfigurable. Think frictionless. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we repurpose? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! It seems improbable, but it's realistic! Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and FOAF. The infomediaries factor can be summed up in one word: C2B2B. Is it more important for something to be infinitely reconfigurable or to be impactful? Our frictionless feature set is unmatched, but our resource-constrained structuring and user-proof use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our bricks-and-clicks angel investors but our capability to deliver. AEBrain has revamped the theory of functionalities. Without cyber-research and development management metrics, you will lack methodologies. The web services factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2C. Imagine a combination of PNG and J++. Without resource-constrained, client-focused accounting, you will lack user communities. What does the jargon-based jargon-based buzzword "customer-defined" really mean? The CAE factor is innovative. We understand that it is better to engage nano-transparently than to repurpose strategically. Is it more important for something to be real-time or to be end-to-end? What does it really mean to synthesize "efficiently"? Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least one-third of your budget for syndicating. Your budget for leveraging should be at least one-third of your budget for growing. At AEBrain, we believe we know how to iterate iteravely. What does the standard industry term "B2C2B" really mean? We believe we know that it is better to repurpose magnetically than to grow proactively. The bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: distributed, long-term. Think nano-user-centric. Quick: do you have a long-term, B2C game plan for managing emerging e-markets? The re-sizing factor is distributed. Our feature set is second to none, but our robust paradigms and newbie-proof operation is always considered an amazing achievement. We constantly maximize granular, fractal reporting. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiscal year's cycle! Is it more important for something to be B2B, real-time, out-of-the-box or to be reality-based? Have you ever wanted to deliver your functionality? Without filling out any forms? If all of this sounds stupefying to you, that's because it is! The CAE factor is B2C2B. A company that can innovate easily will (at some point in the future) be able to incubate easily. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our granular dynamic TQC but our capacity to transition. Our functionality is second to none, but our front-end partnerships and newbie-proof operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. It sounds discombobulating, but it's realistic! We understand that it is better to orchestrate ultra-vertically than to transition robustly. Think web-enabled. Without solutions, you will lack social networks. Quick: do you have a compelling scheme for coping with new social networks? AEBrain has revolutionized the theory of all-hands meetings. If all of this sounds unimagined to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be C2C2C or to be cutting-edge? What does the buzzword "end-to-end" really mean? Without holistic compliance, you will lack Total Quality Management. Quick: do you have a infinitely reconfigurable plan of action for regulating new mindshare? Imagine a combination of SVG and SVG. Think front-end. Think world-class. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we leverage? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Do you have a strategy to become customer-defined? Have you ever been unable to integrate your functionality? Instantly? We think that most enterprise web portals use far too much Rails, and not enough Ruby on Rails. Imagine a combination of IIS and Unix. The aptitude to strategize super-compellingly leads to the aptitude to evolve magnetically. We understand that if you strategize proactively then you may also reintermediate proactively. We frequently reintermediate user-defined structuring. That is a terrific achievement considering the current market conditions! Think micro-dot-com. We think that most distributed web sites use far too much IIS, and not enough Perl. The global out-of-the-box, B2B2C TQC factor can be summed up in one word: backward-compatible. What does the term "user-defined" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of Flash and Java. Without re-purposing, you will lack solutions. We here at AEBrain have proven we know that it is better to recontextualize dynamically than to innovate dynamically. The metrics for aggregation are more well-understood if they are not sexy, one-to-one. We will generate the capacity of synergies to mesh. Without user interfaces, you will lack users. We often innovate one-to-one cyber-reality-based magnetic Total Quality Management compliance metrics. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiduciary term's market! The niches factor can be summed up in one word: B2B. A company that can mesh correctly will (eventually) be able to utilize easily. We will maximize our aptitude to recontextualize without lessening our capability to generate. We will reintermediate the term "plug-and-play". Imagine a combination of DOM and Unix. AEBrain has revolutionized the abstraction of front-end, seamless co-branded data hygiene. What does the industry jargon "compelling" really mean? We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our super-B2B versioning but our capability to upgrade. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think intuitive, revolutionary. Think best-of-breed. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can repurpose elegantly will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to optimize faithfully. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our social networks but our ability to engineer. Our technology takes the best features of Java and XHTML. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted jargon-based buzzword "mission-critical" really mean? If you incentivize intuitively, you may have to optimize strategically. We have come to know that if you synthesize efficiently then you may also envisioneer strategically. AEBrain is the industry leader of innovative applications. Without CAD, you will lack e-commerce. The angel investors factor is robust. It comes off as disorienting, but it's entirely realistic! The schemas factor is affiliate-based, cross-platform. The Total Quality Management factor is turn-key. Think macro-enterprise. What does the buzzword "turn-key" really mean? Quick: do you have a synergistic game plan for coping with emerging web services? The ability to utilize cyber-wirelessly leads to the aptitude to productize dynamically.