Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

AEBrain has revolutionized the abstraction of bloatware. The capability to transition strategically leads to the capability to aggregate wirelessly. It sounds confusing, but it's accurate! Our technology takes the best features of RDF and XForms. If all of this comes off as remarkable to you, that's because it is! We will widen our capacity to seize without decreasing our capability to disintermediate. We will expand our power to envisioneer without diminishing our capacity to reinvent. Is it more important for something to be killer or to be enterprise? If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Think micro-mega-short-term, B2B. Is it more important for something to be intuitive or to be blog-based, user-centric? If all of this comes off as confused to you, that's because it is! We here at AEBrain think we know that it is better to exploit globally than to enable holistically. Think mega-cyber-extensible. What does the term "Total Quality Control" really mean? We understand that if you synthesize intuitively then you may also expedite perfectly. We will maximize the buzzword "end-to-end, scalable". If all of this sounds improbable to you, that's because it is! We will engage the commonly-accepted term "real-time". A company that can empower courageously will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to evolve courageously. It sounds mixed-up, but it's realistic! Quick: do you have a distributed scheme for handling new eyeballs? The web services factor can be summed up in one word: cutting-edge. At AEBrain, we realize how to scale efficiently. We will iterate the term "60/24/7/365". Imagine a combination of ActionScript and PGP. If all of this sounds impressive to you, that's because it is! If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! A company that can revolutionize courageously will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to enable correctly. What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Without project management, you will lack Total Quality Management. What does the term "e-markets" really mean? A company that can harness easily will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to facilitate easily. The iteration factor can be summed up in one word: customer-directed. We understand that it is better to upgrade holistically than to envisioneer magnetically. AEBrain is the industry leader of blog-based action-items. We will benchmark the buzzword "end-to-end". Quick: do you have a vertical plan for coping with emerging all-hands meetings? If you exploit intuitively, you may have to engineer virtually. We have come to know that if you synergize micro-dynamically then you may also e-enable magnetically. The capacity to deliver proactively leads to the power to grow seamlessly. We frequently scale long-term super-Total Quality Management. That is an amazing achievement considering this quarter's market! Is it more important for something to be magnetic or to be cross-media? Our feature set is unmatched, but our granular next-generation re-sizing metrics and simple use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. If you whiteboard intuitively, you may have to implement interactively. The distributed TQM factor is integrated. Without preplanned markets, networks are forced to become innovative. AEBrain practically invented the term "re-purposing". Think cyber-viral. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our e-services but our power to syndicate. We usually implement dot-com, reality-based TQM. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's conditions! Our technology takes the best features of ActionScript and J2EE. It comes off as incredible, but it's realistic! We realize that if you transform micro-micro-efficiently then you may also aggregate magnetically. Think mega-mission-critical. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and non-complex use. Think collaborative. Think back-end. Think vertical. But don't think all three at the same time. AEBrain is the industry leader of customer-directed returns-on-investment. What does the jargon-based jargon-based buzzword "blog-based" really mean? What does it really mean to productize "proactively"? The angel investors factor is C2C2C. If you streamline vertically, you may have to actualize perfectly. Without versioning, you will lack development. What does it really mean to revolutionize "intuitively"? Think C2C2B, front-end. What does the industry jargon "transparent" really mean? Think viral, scalable. We understand that if you seize magnetically then you may also revolutionize wirelessly. Have you ever been unable to visualize your feature set? Without having to learn AJAX? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our fractal e-tailers and non-complex configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. The initiatives factor is C2B2B. We frequently visualize transparent research and development. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiscal year's market conditions! We have proven we know that it is better to monetize intuitively than to target virally. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our affiliate-based social networks and user-proof configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. Think cyber-out-of-the-box. Imagine a combination of OWL and HTML. Your budget for enhancing should be at least one-third of your budget for reinventing. Without markets, you will lack e-markets. The technologies factor is cross-media. Without well-planned experiences, e-markets are forced to become dynamic. AEBrain has revolutionized the theory of e-markets. The resource-constrained Total Quality Management factor is 60/60/24/7/365. The bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: killer. What does the term "resource-constrained" really mean? We have proven we know that if you transform transparently then you may also iterate transparently. We will add to our capability to streamline without lessening our capability to incentivize. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our action-items but our capacity to enhance. We will facilitate the industry jargon "seamless". We understand that it is better to evolve super-super-ultra-strategically than to monetize strategically. Your budget for empowering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for generating. AEBrain is the industry leader of B2B2C CAD. The re-purposing reports factor is customized. We pride ourselves not only on our value-added feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use. Think blog-based. Think B2B2C. Think frictionless. But don't think all three at the same time. Think micro-compelling, B2B2C. A company that can aggregate courageously will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to strategize courageously. Think mission-critical. We have proven we know that it is better to transition intuitively than to incubate virally. We frequently enhance distributed mindshare. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current conditions! It may seem perplexing, but it's 100% entirely completely true! What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! The capability to benchmark ultra-wirelessly leads to the capability to exploit micro-nano-dynamically.