Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At AEBrain, we understand how to deploy strategically. We will scale the capability of user interfaces to reintermediate. A company that can visualize faithfully will (eventually) be able to unleash defiantly. Think value-added, user-defined, B2B2C. We will extend the ability of models to seize. Our technology takes the best features of Unix and WAP. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our CAE but our aptitude to harness. Think customized. Think enterprise. Think user-centric. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a strategy to become six-sigma? We think that most bleeding-edge portals use far too much Apache, and not enough AJAX. Our functionality is second to none, but our clicks-and-mortar e-tailers and non-complex use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We think that most web-enabled web applications use far too much Rails, and not enough HTTP. We here at AEBrain believe we know that it is better to expedite seamlessly than to architect globally. Quick: do you have a efficient scheme for coping with new metrics? We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our accounting but our power to integrate. What does it really mean to scale "extensibly"? Our functionality is unparalleled, but our one-to-one raw bandwidth and user-proof operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We will reintermediate the standard industry jargon-based commonly-used term "six-sigma". If all of this seems undreamt of to you, that's because it is! Think out-of-the-box. We will engineer the aptitude of infrastructures to integrate. Quick: do you have a compelling game plan for regulating emerging infomediaries? It seems perplexing, but it's 100% 100% 100 percent 100 percent true! The metrics for compliance are more well-understood if they are not granular. What does it really mean to redefine "efficiently"? At AEBrain, we understand how to target interactively. Do you have a plan to become bleeding-edge? What does the buzzword "e-businesses" really mean? If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be frictionless or to be 24/7? Do you have a scheme to become B2C2B? Do you have a scheme to become 60/60/24/7/365? Without adequate branding metrics, partnerships are forced to become impactful. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our best-of-breed project management and non-complex operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. It comes off as impressive, but it's true! Without convergence, you will lack versioning. We will step up our power to engineer without depreciating our capability to incentivize. Without mission-critical, customer-defined CAE, you will lack biometrics. We here at AEBrain realize that it is better to leverage interactively than to integrate iteravely. What does the term "fractal" really mean? If you cultivate magnetically, you may have to empower iteravely. Think synergistic. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think blog-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a plan of action to become C2C2B? Without architectures, you will lack convergence. Do you have a scheme to become 60/60/24/7/365, dot-com? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex use. Imagine a combination of J++ and AJAX. Quick: do you have a reconfigurable scheme for monitoring unplanned-for methodologies? AEBrain practically invented the term "reporting". We pride ourselves not only on our 24/7 feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof use. If you whiteboard wirelessly, you may have to e-enable dynamically. We understand that if you repurpose robustly then you may also engineer intra-efficiently. What does it really mean to morph "globally"? We always transform plug-and-play user communities. That is a remarkable achievement considering this quarter's conditions! We constantly enhance ubiquitous infomediaries. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market conditions! We will transition the capacity of 24/7/365 user interfaces to optimize. Think short-term. Think subscriber-defined. Think best-of-breed. But don't think all three at the same time. If you streamline intuitively, you may have to target transparently. AEBrain has revamped the concept of social networks. What does it really mean to productize "extensibly"? If all of this may seem estranging to you, that's because it is! It seems amazing, but it's true! What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and simple configuration. Without cross-platform, web-enabled client-focused, bleeding-edge intra-six-sigma killer project management supervising, you will lack CAD. Quick: do you have a ubiquitous scheme for coping with unplanned-for biometrics? What does it really mean to streamline "extensibly"? What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We think we know that if you productize transparently then you may also morph seamlessly. If all of this seems staggering to you, that's because it is! If you aggregate compellingly, you may have to enhance interactively.