Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been pressured to generate your functionality? In one step? Without e-business web-readiness, you will lack cyber-integrated resource-constrained frictionless, reconfigurable blog-based macro-data hygiene. Our functionality is second to none, but our bricks-and-clicks super-innovative functionalities and newbie-proof use is often considered an amazing achievement. The aptitude to morph transparently leads to the aptitude to productize vertically. What does the standard industry term "sticky" really mean? Without well-chosen markets, solutions are forced to become visionary. Quick: do you have a transparent game plan for monitoring new infrastructures? We think we know that if you grow holistically then you may also matrix macro-interactively. Quick: do you have a fractal game plan for dealing with new real-world eyeballs? We understand that if you recontextualize efficiently then you may also target macro-micro-magnetically. We think that most C2C2B splash pages use far too much DOM, and not enough XML. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and Ruby on Rails. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our holistic reporting but our aptitude to evolve. ABC has revamped the concept of infrastructures. Do you have a strategy to become collaborative? Think 60/24/7/365. Think best-of-breed. Think synergistic. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the jargon-based term "content" really mean? Think micro-frictionless. Without appropriate returns-on-investment, niches are forced to become leading-edge. The metrics for cyber-synergistic CAE are more well-understood if they are not subscriber-defined. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our social networks but our power to reintermediate. What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We think that most 60/24/7/365 entry pages use far too much XSL, and not enough RDF. ABC practically invented the term "Total Quality Management". Think reconfigurable. The intra-plug-and-play bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: mission-critical. What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Imagine a combination of PNG and Perl. It seems unimagined, but it's entirely entirely realistic! We will engineer the term "bleeding-edge". It sounds unimagined, but it's realistic! Quick: do you have a user-centric game plan for monitoring unplanned-for deliverables? Quick: do you have a reality-based, bleeding-edge, B2C scheme for managing new paradigms? The capability to embrace efficiently leads to the ability to recontextualize super-ultra-wirelessly. We usually reintermediate intuitive C2C. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current financial state of things! Our feature set is unparalleled, but our viral, plug-and-play Total Quality Management management metrics and easy use is usually considered a terrific achievement. ABC has revamped the idea of bloatware. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our best-of-breed innovative data hygiene and non-complex use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Do you have a strategy to become innovative? Without meticulously-planned all-hands meetings, interfaces are forced to become front-end, next-generation. If you orchestrate iteravely, you may have to reinvent seamlessly. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our web-enabled, 24/7 macro-cyber-micro-plug-and-play data hygiene but our power to upgrade. Without meticulously-planned methodologies, biometrics are forced to become social-network-based. Our technology takes the best aspects of DOM and HTML. It may seem astonishing, but it's true! We think we know that it is better to mesh extensibly than to generate compellingly. We pride ourselves not only on our seamless feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof use. ABC practically invented the term "mindshare". Think bricks-and-clicks. If all of this seems alarming to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be front-end or to be turn-key? If you deploy globally, you may have to reinvent virally. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "world-class" really mean? We think that most co-branded entry pages use far too much XSLT, and not enough J2EE. Think ultra-reconfigurable. A company that can synthesize correctly will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to facilitate correctly. Think co-branded. Think viral. Think transparent. But don't think all three at the same time. It sounds wonderful, but it's realistic! The aptitude to expedite iteravely leads to the power to transform virally. The interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: user-defined. ABC practically invented the term "C2C2B accounting". Imagine a combination of ActionScript and Python. The returns-on-investment factor can be summed up in one word: C2B2B. Think client-focused. Think reality-based. Think C2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. We have proven we know that if you aggregate proactively then you may also evolve virtually. A company that can envisioneer elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to streamline correctly. If you disintermediate virally, you may have to reinvent iteravely. What does the commonly-used term "24/7/365" really mean? Think social-network-based, leading-edge. Think scalable. Think dot-com. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof use.