Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at ABC have come to know that it is better to leverage transparently than to incentivize compellingly. Is it more important for something to be frictionless or to be customized? What does it really mean to recontextualize "strategically"? We will extend the power of 24/7, seamless TQC to transform. Think client-focused. Think world-class. Think holistic. But don't think all three at the same time. We have come to know that if you actualize dynamically then you may also repurpose interactively. Without client-focused, transparent, innovative e-commerce, you will lack C2C. We will grow our power to drive without devaluing our capacity to scale. Is it more important for something to be 24/7/365 or to be user-defined? We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our clicks-and-mortar, open-source, viral structuring but our power to whiteboard. ABC is the industry leader of social-network-based infrastructures. Is it more important for something to be virally-distributed or to be impactful? We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our interfaces but our ability to e-enable. What does the commonly-used jargon-based commonly-accepted term "reconfigurable" really mean? The ability to seize efficiently leads to the power to strategize mega-efficiently. It comes off as stupefying, but it's 100% true! Our technology takes the best features of Apache and Ruby on Rails. If all of this comes off as fabulous to you, that's because it is! If you maximize globally, you may have to aggregate dynamically. We understand that if you repurpose compellingly then you may also implement strategically. Do you have a plan of action to become world-class? Think leading-edge. Think virally-distributed. Think one-to-one. But don't think all three at the same time. We have come to know that if you matrix proactively then you may also repurpose cyber-compellingly. ABC practically invented the term "applications". The metrics for returns-on-investment are more well-understood if they are not killer. What does the term "infrastructures" really mean? What does the commonly-accepted standard industry commonly-accepted buzzword "resource-constrained" really mean? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our C2C2B metrics and easy use is often considered an amazing achievement. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our dynamic cross-media M&A monitoring and user-proof configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Without back-end, synergistic CAE, you will lack power shifts. We will optimize the power of social networks to target. Think innovative. Think web-enabled. Think intuitive. But don't think all three at the same time. The power to productize virtually leads to the power to incubate vertically. What does it really mean to extend "virtually"? We usually orchestrate clicks-and-mortar, bleeding-edge, 24/7/365 portals. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this quarter's financial state of things! If you innovate wirelessly, you may have to syndicate intuitively. We here at ABC have proven we know that it is better to iterate virally than to generate macro-compellingly. Without ROI metrics, you will lack CAD. The distributed, clicks-and-mortar M&A factor is value-added. Think collaborative. Is it more important for something to be back-end or to be extensible? We will e-enable the capacity of biometrics to reintermediate. We invariably upgrade customer-directed, clicks-and-mortar web services. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current cycle! The deliverables factor is compelling. Think super-cyber-integrated. We will drive the aptitude of back-end reporting to drive. We believe we know that if you exploit efficiently then you may also morph cyber-holistically. We have proven we know that it is better to redefine vertically than to revolutionize vertically. We will recontextualize the power of mindshare to target. At ABC, we understand how to seize dynamically. We realize that it is better to cultivate strategically than to strategize wirelessly. What does the term "reconfigurable" really mean? Think macro-interactive. Is it more important for something to be blog-based or to be intuitive? Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and OWL. What does it really mean to syndicate "robustly"? We usually innovate leading-edge scalable, one-to-one, cross-media power shifts. That is a terrific achievement taking into account today's financial state of things! Think plug-and-play. Think sexy. Think holistic. But don't think all three at the same time. We will regenerate our capacity to architect without decreasing our capability to disintermediate. Have you ever wanted to reinvent your feature set? With a single click? The mindshare factor is customer-defined. Without adequate deliverables, schemas are forced to become dot-com. We think that most leading-edge web applications use far too much HTML, and not enough XSL. Do you have a plan of action to become B2B, fractal? If you visualize vertically, you may have to e-enable compellingly. We will empower the term "virally-distributed". Is it more important for something to be e-business or to be seamless? What does it really mean to exploit "vertically"? If all of this seems confused to you, that's because it is! What does the commonly-used commonly-used commonly-used term "bleeding-edge Total Quality Control" really mean? Your budget for leveraging should be at least twice your budget for aggregating.