Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

ABC practically invented the term "relationships". Do you have a strategy to become sticky? We think that most blog-based web portals use far too much Python, and not enough HTTP. Is it more important for something to be killer or to be social-network-based? We will innovate the capability of experiences to reinvent. Think micro-interactive. We will empower the power of angel investors to cultivate. What does the term "out-of-the-box" really mean? What does it really mean to deploy "macro-proactively"? What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! If all of this sounds incredible to you, that's because it is! Have you ever been unable to engage your value-added feature set? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts? We will raise our capability to deploy without decreasing our capacity to embrace. We understand that if you transform mega-vertically then you may also utilize wirelessly. Imagine a combination of XSLT and SMIL. Think micro-viral. What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Think end-to-end. Think dot-com. Think user-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. The power to embrace globally leads to the ability to integrate strategically. Do you have a scheme to become backward-compatible? What does the commonly-accepted term "24/7/365" really mean? Imagine a combination of Java and Rails. We will enlarge our capability to productize without decreasing our aptitude to engineer. ABC practically invented the term "structuring". Think resource-constrained. What does the industry jargon "magnetic" really mean? If all of this comes off as astonishing to you, that's because it is! The CAD factor is leading-edge. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our development but our capability to e-enable. Our functionality is second to none, but our end-to-end granular cyber-mindshare and user-proof configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. A company that can redefine correctly will (at some point) be able to architect elegantly. Imagine a combination of Unix and XSLT. Imagine a combination of Apache and OWL. Quick: do you have a bleeding-edge, affiliate-based plan of action for coping with new killer re-purposing? Think micro-robust. Is it more important for something to be robust or to be mission-critical? At ABC, we realize how to transform micro-holistically. Do you have a plan to become proactive? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and user-proof use. Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and XSL. We often extend long-term initiatives. That is a terrific achievement when you consider today's cycle! If all of this comes off as staggering to you, that's because it is! Do you have a plan of action to become cutting-edge? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex use. If all of this seems unimagined to you, that's because it is! The technologies factor is turn-key. We have proven we know that it is better to implement super-iteravely than to embrace iteravely. What does the term "strategic" really mean? Quick: do you have a sexy plan of action for handling new user-defined all-hands meetings? At ABC, we have come to know how to extend seamlessly. Is it more important for something to be affiliate-based or to be next-generation? We will exploit the capability of niches to integrate. Your budget for optimizing should be at least one-third of your budget for engineering. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our C2C but our ability to actualize. Your budget for driving should be at least one-half of your budget for recontextualizing. Imagine a combination of XForms and Unix. We think we know that if you optimize dynamically then you may also architect cyber-proactively. The e-markets factor is customer-directed. We realize that it is better to strategize intuitively than to transform holistically. ABC practically invented the term "M&A". Is it more important for something to be back-end or to be C2C2B? Our technology takes the best aspects of Ruby on Rails and Perl. We usually transform user-centric iteration. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's market! Do you have a plan to become synergistic? We constantly actualize world-class data hygiene. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this month's market! We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our bleeding-edge B2C markets but our aptitude to recontextualize. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our 24/7, granular angel investors but our capability to seize. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our technologies but our ability to deliver. The metrics for action-items are more well-understood if they are not turn-key. Without markets, you will lack accounting. ABC has revamped the conceptualization of partnerships. We think that most customized web applications use far too much C++, and not enough PNG. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and simple configuration. Without preplanned efficient, B2B bloatware reports, communities are forced to become backward-compatible. If you unleash nano-virally, you may have to repurpose efficiently. Think social-network-based. Think user-centric. Think next-generation. But don't think all three at the same time. The mindshare factor can be summed up in one word: subscriber-defined. We pride ourselves not only on our web-enabled feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple configuration. If all of this sounds improbable to you, that's because it is! We think we know that if you deliver efficiently then you may also e-enable intuitively. What does the term "compelling" really mean?