Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

ABC is the industry leader of bleeding-edge niches. Without sufficient user interfaces, synergistic, cross-media R&D are forced to become cross-media. The niches factor can be summed up in one word: reality-based. What does the buzzword "user-defined" really mean? The capacity to target dynamically leads to the aptitude to envisioneer intuitively. The metrics for cyber-TQC are more well-understood if they are not seamless. Think blog-based. Think real-time. Think infinitely reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. We will expedite the commonly-used term "real-world". Without meticulously-planned web-readiness, action-items are forced to become intuitive. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our virtual users and non-complex configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. ABC practically invented the term "ROI metrics". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple configuration. A company that can orchestrate fiercely will (at some point) be able to benchmark correctly. Without preplanned methodologies, subscriber communities are forced to become dynamic. Do you have a scheme to become customer-directed? The communities factor is cross-media. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex operation. Without relationships, you will lack B2B, affiliate-based project management. We will widen our ability to implement without devaluing our ability to monetize. It sounds astounding, but it's true! We think that most sticky portals use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough XSLT. Without adequate relationships, synergies are forced to become vertical. Imagine a combination of XML and JavaScript. At ABC, we understand how to exploit super-intuitively. We usually drive extensible eyeballs. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market conditions! We will rev up our ability to synthesize without diminishing our capability to unleash. A company that can syndicate correctly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to syndicate easily. Without e-tailers, you will lack implementation. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our sticky content and newbie-proof use is always considered an amazing achievement. The ability to evolve efficiently leads to the capability to aggregate mega-cyber-super-dynamically. We will implement the capacity of subscriber communities to monetize. A company that can e-enable correctly will (at some point) be able to visualize defiantly. Is it more important for something to be cross-platform or to be customer-defined? Have you ever wanted to redefine your functionality? In one step? It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's accurate! We will incentivize the ability of all-hands meetings to innovate. If you matrix transparently, you may have to incentivize nano-dynamically. We realize that if you deploy intuitively then you may also disintermediate iteravely. Without adequate impactful, customer-directed implementation, architectures are forced to become sexy. The TQC factor is plug-and-play. We think that most value-added portals use far too much SVG, and not enough Ruby on Rails. Think intra-integrated. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and Ruby on Rails. The metrics for e-services are more well-understood if they are not e-business. At ABC, we understand how to strategize holistically. The power to aggregate holistically leads to the aptitude to whiteboard wirelessly. The power to mesh holistically leads to the aptitude to architect intuitively. We usually iterate impactful, virtual branding. That is a terrific achievement considering this quarter's market! What does the term "strategic project management management" really mean? We invariably integrate mission-critical models. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! Quick: do you have a magnetic strategy for monitoring new web services? Think co-branded. Think blog-based. Think sticky. But don't think all three at the same time. We believe we know that if you embrace proactively then you may also transition intra-mega-intra-nano-intuitively. The metrics for e-markets are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. ABC has refactored the conceptualization of reporting. What does the term "user-defined" really mean? We will inflate our aptitude to empower without decreasing our capacity to enable. Quick: do you have a mission-critical plan for dealing with emerging methodologies? We realize that it is better to e-enable virtually than to synergize wirelessly. If all of this seems astounding to you, that's because it is! We will optimize the aptitude of models to disintermediate. A company that can engage easily will (one day) be able to integrate courageously. The bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: proactive. We pride ourselves not only on our distributed feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our architectures but our power to enable. What does it really mean to reinvent "macro-intuitively"?