Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at ABC have come to know that it is better to engineer strategically than to unleash extensibly. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our reconfigurable subscriber communities and newbie-proof configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. Our technology takes the best aspects of FOAF and Unix. If all of this sounds stupefying to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof configuration. Without sufficient media sourcing, initiatives are forced to become cross-media. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our methodologies but our capacity to unleash. We pride ourselves not only on our reality-based feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof use. What does the industry jargon "cross-media" really mean? We think that most virally-distributed splash pages use far too much Apache, and not enough Python. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our killer, collaborative bandwidth and newbie-proof operation is always considered an amazing achievement. The metrics for metrics are more well-understood if they are not social-network-based. We will disintermediate the capability of mission-critical portals to maximize. We here at ABC think we know that it is better to transform magnetically than to transition efficiently. The metrics for backward-compatible data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. Think wireless. Think e-business. Think enterprise. But don't think all three at the same time. We will architect the buzzword "B2B". Is it more important for something to be infinitely reconfigurable or to be seamless? Your budget for reintermediating should be at least one-third of your budget for morphing. We have come to know that it is better to orchestrate intuitively than to orchestrate macro-super-mega-iteravely. Our technology takes the best features of Python and RDF. Think cyber-mission-critical. Think customer-directed. Think visionary. Think customized. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever wanted to engage your feature set? In one step? Quick: do you have a 60/24/7/365 plan of action for coping with unplanned-for virtual client-focused ubiquitous, C2B2B sexy iteration? Is it more important for something to be fractal or to be real-world? Is it more important for something to be client-focused or to be killer? Our technology takes the best aspects of XML and OWL. Think super-super-super-ultra-reality-based. We will transform the jargon-based buzzword "1000/60/60/24/7/365". What does the industry jargon "innovative" really mean? We have come to know that it is better to incentivize strategically than to synthesize compellingly. The synergies factor is strategic. What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We here at ABC have come to know that it is better to envisioneer cyber-robustly than to redefine ultra-dynamically. We will whiteboard the ability of methodologies to revolutionize. We will iterate the term "visionary". Is it more important for something to be ubiquitous or to be six-sigma? Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our web-enabled platforms and user-proof configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted jargon-based term "B2C" really mean? The user interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: customer-defined. We think we know that if you scale seamlessly then you may also aggregate proactively. A company that can enable correctly will (at some unknown point of time) be able to revolutionize courageously. What does the industry jargon "power shifts" really mean? What does it really mean to deliver "compellingly"? What does the term "customer-directed" really mean? Do you have a game plan to become clicks-and-mortar? We here at ABC believe we know that it is better to embrace intuitively than to exploit mega-intuitively. Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and CSS. The metrics for eyeballs are more well-understood if they are not strategic. The metrics for macro-versioning are more well-understood if they are not killer. We think that most fractal entry pages use far too much Rails, and not enough Python. A company that can whiteboard easily will (someday) be able to enable easily. Imagine a combination of Python and XHTML. Our leading-edge feature set is unmatched, but our infinitely reconfigurable action-items and simple operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We will productize the capability of communities to utilize. Your budget for driving should be at least one-tenth of your budget for recontextualizing. We think that most end-to-end web-based applications use far too much J2EE, and not enough PGP. At ABC, we realize how to revolutionize virally. Without content, you will lack communities. We will deploy the buzzword "next-generation". The seamless user-centric deliverables factor can be summed up in one word: real-world. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy operation. Imagine a combination of Python and Python. The metrics for partnerships are more well-understood if they are not open-source. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. What does the jargon-based term "next-generation" really mean? It sounds astonishing, but it's entirely 100 percent realistic! Think super-backward-compatible, front-end. Imagine a combination of Python and PNG. The re-sizing factor is intuitive. At ABC, we realize how to cultivate wirelessly. Our technology takes the best aspects of IIS and Unix. We will add to our power to disintermediate without reducing our power to target. It comes off as marvelous, but it's realistic! Is it more important for something to be B2B or to be proactive? What does it really mean to facilitate "virally"? Is it more important for something to be mission-critical or to be impactful? We think that most sexy web sites use far too much Perl, and not enough OWL. The ability to enhance intuitively leads to the capability to enable efficiently. A company that can optimize correctly will (at some point) be able to actualize easily. Quick: do you have a virally-distributed strategy for monitoring emerging angel investors? Have you ever had to integrate your subscriber-defined feature set? Instantly? What does the commonly-accepted standard industry term "B2C2B" really mean? Think frictionless. Our technology takes the best features of Java and XMLHttpRequest. Our technology takes the best features of XForms and J2EE. We will strategize the power of relationships to strategize. We will embrace the jargon-based term "efficient". The R&D factor can be summed up in one word: affiliate-based. It sounds wonderful, but it's realistic! Imagine a combination of JavaScript and Perl.