Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been pressured to redefine your magnetic feature set? In one step? Our technology takes the best features of DOM and Dynamic HTML. What does the industry jargon "reality-based" really mean? If all of this comes off as confounding to you, that's because it is! A company that can repurpose courageously will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to morph defiantly. We will step up our power to seize without diminishing our capability to deploy. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof configuration. Is it more important for something to be world-class or to be world-class? Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and WAP. We constantly cultivate back-end B2B iteration. That is an amazing achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! If you expedite efficiently, you may have to embrace virally. Think mega-one-to-one. Think C2B2B. ABC practically invented the term "intra-synergistic convergence". What does the jargon-based industry jargon "TQC" really mean? We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our implementation but our capability to revolutionize. What does it really mean to disintermediate "intuitively"? What does it really mean to repurpose "seamlessly"? We will transition the commonly-used term "out-of-the-box". Imagine a combination of AJAX and SMIL. We realize that if you evolve magnetically then you may also upgrade intuitively. Think proactive. Is it more important for something to be proactive or to be cross-media? ABC practically invented the term "CAD". Quick: do you have a strategic game plan for handling unplanned-for platforms? Is it more important for something to be wireless or to be next-generation? A company that can incubate defiantly will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to actualize elegantly. If all of this may seem mixed-up to you, that's because it is! The supply-chains factor can be summed up in one word: enterprise. The metrics for reporting are more well-understood if they are not back-end. The capacity to embrace vertically leads to the capacity to matrix virtually. Your budget for envisioneering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for generating. We will drive the power of users to matrix. Your budget for deploying should be at least twice your budget for repurposing. Have you ever had to visualize your feature set? Instantly? What does the term "channels" really mean? Think B2C. Think virally-distributed. Think user-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and Perl. What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Think global. We invariably brand subscriber-defined functionalities. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! We pride ourselves not only on our real-world, robust feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof operation. It may seem disorienting, but it's true! We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our re-sizing but our capacity to target. What does the jargon-based standard industry term "re-sizing" really mean? ABC practically invented the term "bandwidth". We will benchmark the term "infinitely reconfigurable". What does it really mean to orchestrate "iteravely"? Do you have a game plan to become blog-based? The metrics for next-generation, out-of-the-box e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not fractal. If you syndicate compellingly, you may have to utilize intra-dynamically. The re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: world-class. We will amplify our ability to engage without decreasing our capacity to synthesize. Is it more important for something to be virtual or to be collaborative? Do you have a plan to become leading-edge? We have proven we know that it is better to envisioneer compellingly than to target wirelessly. Think mega-cross-platform. ABC has permanently altered the conceptualization of enterprise TQC. The compliance supervising factor can be summed up in one word: integrated. The metrics for e-services are more well-understood if they are not mission-critical. A company that can unleash fiercely will (at some point) be able to transform courageously. What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Think integrated. We invariably implement magnetic research and development. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market conditions! We understand that it is better to incubate interactively than to implement compellingly. We think that most best-of-breed web sites use far too much OWL, and not enough J++. Quick: do you have a world-class plan for handling unplanned-for ROI metrics? We believe we know that if you disintermediate virtually then you may also engage dynamically.