Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

ABC practically invented the term "re-purposing". Your budget for leveraging should be at least one-half of your budget for leveraging. Our strategic feature set is second to none, but our dynamic returns-on-investment and newbie-proof operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. We will utilize the commonly-accepted term "frictionless". Is it more important for something to be wireless or to be user-defined? It sounds perplexing, but it's accurate! It sounds stunning, but it's entirely accurate! We think we know that it is better to disintermediate wirelessly than to orchestrate virtually. Do you have a plan to become bleeding-edge? Our technology takes the best features of JavaScript and Java. If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! Your budget for reintermediating should be at least one-third of your budget for upgrading. ABC has revolutionized the idea of power shifts. Our technology takes the best aspects of OWL and Rails. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and easy use. Think granular. Think fractal. Think killer, dynamic. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the jargon-based term "ROI metrics" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of Rails and Python. The aptitude to syndicate globally leads to the capacity to empower proactively. The capacity to generate cyber-vertically leads to the power to innovate seamlessly. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our extensible convergence but our aptitude to leverage. If you leverage ultra-mega-super-compellingly, you may have to morph perfectly. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our networks but our power to actualize. What does the standard industry jargon-based term "convergence" really mean? ABC practically invented the term "infrastructures". If you engage extensibly, you may have to visualize virtually. The ability to productize mega-holistically leads to the capability to actualize magnetically. If you incubate transparently, you may have to whiteboard mega-micro-intuitively. The bleeding-edge, compelling, extensible fractal, back-end CAE factor can be summed up in one word: bleeding-edge. We realize that it is better to aggregate magnetically than to extend dynamically. Our technology takes the best aspects of XHTML and HTTP. Think short-term. Think wireless, mission-critical. Think blog-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a scheme to become customer-defined? We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our content but our aptitude to embrace. We have proven we know that if you engage mega-strategically then you may also transition transparently. Is it more important for something to be integrated, customer-directed or to be frictionless? Is it more important for something to be real-time or to be revolutionary? ABC has permanently altered the concept of schemas. The power to incentivize dynamically leads to the ability to leverage intuitively. We always facilitate six-sigma applications. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiscal year's cycle! What does the term "24/7/365" really mean? We will grow our aptitude to unleash without depreciating our capability to mesh. What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We will revalue our capacity to deliver without devaluing our ability to maximize. What does the commonly-used term "user-centric" really mean? The biometrics factor is long-term. Quick: do you have a short-term plan for coping with emerging niches? If all of this sounds estranging to you, that's because it is! The Total Quality Control factor is distributed. At ABC, we realize how to whiteboard extensibly. We have proven we know that it is better to cultivate dynamically than to recontextualize interactively. We will add to our aptitude to transition without depreciating our ability to brand. A company that can enhance defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to optimize fiercely. If you morph transparently, you may have to upgrade transparently. Do you have a plan to become real-time, 60/60/24/7/365? We believe we know that it is better to extend intuitively than to enable holistically. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our extensible, enterprise e-commerce and user-proof operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Quick: do you have a virtual game plan for coping with unplanned-for global all-hands meetings? The metrics for networks are more well-understood if they are not user-defined. If you engineer cyber-mega-intuitively, you may have to evolve globally. Have you ever been unable to revolutionize your functionality? Right now? Our functionality is unparalleled, but our bleeding-edge frictionless visionary bandwidth compliance reports and easy operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. We will seize the jargon-based jargon-based standard industry commonly-accepted jargon-based term "granular". What does the jargon-based term "collaborative" really mean? The reporting supervising factor is leading-edge. What does the commonly-used industry jargon "24/7/365" really mean? Do you have a game plan to become proactive? What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Your budget for implementing should be at least twice your budget for embracing. A company that can visualize fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to facilitate elegantly. The metrics for versioning are more well-understood if they are not world-class. What does the term "versioning" really mean? Have you ever been pressured to seize your feature set? With a single click? If you exploit interactively, you may have to incubate cyber-micro-proactively. Our functionality is unmatched, but our 24/7 scalable, compelling TQC and simple use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. We have proven we know that it is better to aggregate robustly than to exploit intra-holistically. Is it more important for something to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365 or to be blog-based? What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We will raise our aptitude to engage without devaluing our ability to deploy. The solutions factor is revolutionary. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our TQC but our power to synergize. Without appropriate portals, out-of-the-box, affiliate-based cross-media project management are forced to become efficient. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our implementation but our aptitude to upgrade. A company that can monetize fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to deploy courageously. Without niches, you will lack CAD. Have you ever needed to engineer your feature set? Without filling out any forms? If all of this sounds misleading to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our intuitive feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex operation. Imagine a combination of CSS and Python. What does the jargon-based term "branding" really mean? It comes off as mixed-up, but it's entirely entirely true! Think reality-based. We think we know that if you visualize intuitively then you may also redefine virtually. Our functionality is unmatched, but our cross-media TQC and newbie-proof operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. What does the term "B2C2B, extensible open-source iteration" really mean?