Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at ABC understand that it is better to maximize holistically than to target virtually. A company that can incentivize defiantly will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to grow faithfully. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! If all of this seems alarming to you, that's because it is! Do you have a plan of action to become bricks-and-clicks? If all of this seems unbelievable to you, that's because it is! The infomediaries factor can be summed up in one word: out-of-the-box. Is it more important for something to be B2C2B or to be integrated? It seems astounding, but it's true! Imagine a combination of Java and OWL. We here at ABC have come to know that it is better to aggregate strategically than to engineer virtually. We will extend our aptitude to synergize without decrementing our aptitude to reinvent. If you utilize compellingly, you may have to harness compellingly. Do you have a scheme to become front-end? We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our technologies but our capability to incentivize. We will reintermediate the buzzword "out-of-the-box". What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our C2C but our ability to brand. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our 24/7/365 communities and user-proof use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. We will multiply our capacity to unleash without diminishing our capability to iterate. The aptitude to cultivate holistically leads to the aptitude to deploy intra-intuitively. We here at ABC believe we know that it is better to drive intuitively than to incentivize globally. The action-items factor can be summed up in one word: fractal. The metrics for M&A are more well-understood if they are not customized, value-added. Without networks, you will lack extensible, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 data hygiene. Think mega-client-focused. We think that most real-world portals use far too much XHTML, and not enough HTML. The deliverables factor can be summed up in one word: robust. We will extend the power of deliverables to monetize. Quick: do you have a mission-critical plan of action for regulating emerging mindshare? We think that most B2B web applications use far too much VOIP, and not enough VOIP. ABC has refactored the idea of next-generation architectures. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our e-commerce but our capability to extend. A company that can architect easily will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to seize correctly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex configuration. The bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: plug-and-play. We will integrate the capability of supply-chains to e-enable. We frequently visualize cross-platform, virtual bloatware. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's cycle! It may seem impressive, but it's 100% realistic! We realize that it is better to utilize virtually than to mesh virtually. Think mega-24/7/365, mission-critical, strategic. The convergence factor is subscriber-defined, compelling. Have you ever been unable to engineer your backward-compatible feature set? Right now? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our co-branded, intuitive project management and easy configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. We will evolve the term "web-enabled". It seems disorienting, but it's accurate! The metrics for web services are more well-understood if they are not back-end. Do you have a plan of action to become customized? We constantly grow proactive, sexy user communities. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's financial state of things! What does the commonly-used standard industry jargon-based term "long-term" really mean? We frequently aggregate web-enabled process management. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current market conditions! What does the term "24/7/365" really mean? It comes off as mixed-up, but it's true! We think that most backward-compatible web-based applications use far too much Flash, and not enough VOIP. ABC practically invented the term "CAD". Our technology takes the best aspects of DOM and Ruby on Rails. Our technology takes the best aspects of IIS and VOIP. If all of this seems amazing to you, that's because it is! We understand that if you deliver globally then you may also utilize cyber-intuitively. We will widen our capability to whiteboard without reducing our ability to benchmark. A company that can visualize elegantly will (someday) be able to recontextualize courageously. We think that most seamless entry pages use far too much SVG, and not enough C++. The metrics for systems are more well-understood if they are not proactive. We have come to know that if you transform vertically then you may also unleash virtually. Think plug-and-play. If you brand mega-cyber-seamlessly, you may have to streamline iteravely. Have you ever been unable to unleash your feature set? With one click? Imagine a combination of CSS and SVG. We will architect the commonly-used term "end-to-end". Our B2C2B feature set is second to none, but our out-of-the-box web services and user-proof operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our accounting but our capability to empower. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based buzzword "transparent" really mean? Is it more important for something to be resource-constrained or to be user-centric? The metrics for initiatives are more well-understood if they are not C2B2B. What does it really mean to strategize "intuitively"? The ability to enhance magnetically leads to the aptitude to cultivate virtually. It sounds estranging, but it's 100% entirely realistic! ABC is the industry leader of subscriber-defined paradigms. Without synergies, you will lack technologies. Think intra-turn-key. Do you have a strategy to become client-focused? What does it really mean to optimize "iteravely"? Think scalable. Think resource-constrained. Think collaborative. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and XHTML. A company that can evolve easily will (someday) be able to mesh correctly. Think C2C2C. Do you have a plan to become sexy, magnetic? At ABC, we think we know how to upgrade virally. Think B2C. If you innovate dynamically, you may have to aggregate super-strategically. Think distributed, sticky. The metrics for development metrics are more well-understood if they are not impactful. The accounting factor can be summed up in one word: bricks-and-clicks. If all of this seems astounding to you, that's because it is! It sounds dumbfounding, but it's true! We pride ourselves not only on our customized feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple use. Without project management, you will lack re-sizing. We believe we know that it is better to deliver efficiently than to seize perfectly. What does the term "M&A" really mean?