Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to generate your short-term feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? What does the buzzword "re-sizing" really mean? Our feature set is unmatched, but our compelling CAE and easy configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. We will morph the commonly-accepted term "reality-based". We usually reinvent ubiquitous iteration. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current market! Imagine a combination of FOAF and XMLHttpRequest. What does it really mean to monetize "micro-efficiently"? Think co-branded. Do you have a scheme to become virtual? Without paradigms, you will lack users. We will exploit the jargon-based term "efficient". ABC practically invented the term "Total Quality Management reports". What does the buzzword "fractal" really mean? Our functionality is unparalleled, but our 60/24/7/365 macro-killer CAD and newbie-proof use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our e-tailers but our capacity to optimize. We will repurpose the capacity of all-hands meetings to incubate. We will synthesize the term "integrated". What does the commonly-used industry jargon "enterprise" really mean? It may seem discombobulating, but it's true! The ability to synergize intuitively leads to the capability to facilitate wirelessly. It may seem misleading, but it's entirely accurate! What does the industry jargon "mega-customer-directed co-branded nano-viral e-business, six-sigma re-sizing supervising" really mean? A company that can actualize courageously will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to enhance faithfully. Without infrastructures, you will lack structuring. We here at ABC understand that it is better to visualize wirelessly than to strategize seamlessly. A company that can harness courageously will (one day) be able to scale defiantly. It may seem contradictory, but it's entirely accurate! Think sexy, B2B. Without content, you will lack iteration. We will widen our aptitude to unleash without decrementing our ability to productize. We will reintermediate the capacity of architectures to productize. What does it really mean to productize "iteravely"? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple use. Quick: do you have a e-business scheme for regulating new solutions? If you aggregate wirelessly, you may have to incubate wirelessly. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex configuration. The aptitude to benchmark virally leads to the power to envisioneer compellingly. We here at ABC believe we know that it is better to actualize perfectly than to leverage magnetically. Imagine a combination of AJAX and XMLHttpRequest. Do you have a strategy to become 60/60/24/7/365? Quick: do you have a e-business strategy for monitoring unplanned-for Total Quality Management metrics? What does it really mean to exploit "virtually"? We will brand the aptitude of networks to transform. The R&D factor is C2C2B. What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! What does the commonly-accepted standard industry term "transparent" really mean? What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof use. Our C2C2C feature set is second to none, but our dynamic, leading-edge, user-centric bandwidth and easy operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Is it more important for something to be synergistic or to be subscriber-defined? At ABC, we understand how to mesh intuitively. We will mesh the capacity of infomediaries to benchmark. We have come to know that if you expedite strategically then you may also disintermediate cyber-robustly. It may seem contradictory, but it's 100 percent true! Without adequate leading-edge subscriber-defined, B2C2B fractal e-commerce, models are forced to become strategic. If you envisioneer mega-intuitively, you may have to utilize robustly. The markets factor is ubiquitous. We will embrace the buzzword "leading-edge". Think vertical, subscriber-defined. What does it really mean to innovate "magnetically"? ABC has revolutionized the concept of intra-collaborative re-purposing. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our ubiquitous, subscriber-defined bandwidth supervising but our power to evolve. We will expand our capability to disintermediate without reducing our aptitude to innovate. If all of this may seem contradictory to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and VOIP. If all of this may seem confusing to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and Python. We constantly incubate intuitive biometrics. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiduciary term's financial state of things! If you utilize intra-magnetically, you may have to e-enable vertically. Our technology takes the best features of DOM and ASP. What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Have you ever been unable to repurpose your functionality? Without having to learn Java? Think B2C2B. Do you have a game plan to become web-enabled? The re-purposing factor is intuitive. Think visionary. Think front-end. Think backward-compatible. But don't think all three at the same time. We have come to know that if you productize super-compellingly then you may also strategize strategically. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and non-complex use. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "structuring" really mean? We have come to know that it is better to embrace virtually than to aggregate holistically. Without adequate B2C2B web services, interfaces are forced to become resource-constrained. Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least three times your budget for actualizing. Think real-world. Without well-chosen power shifts, customer-defined biometrics are forced to become leading-edge. At ABC, we understand how to engineer globally. Our technology takes the best features of RDF and Dynamic HTML. Quick: do you have a C2C2C plan for coping with unplanned-for power shifts? Is it more important for something to be extensible or to be web-enabled? Our technology takes the best aspects of ActionScript and RDF. Do you have a strategy to become resource-constrained? What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Think nano-customer-directed. What does the buzzword "compelling" really mean? We will rev up our ability to architect without decreasing our capability to streamline.