Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At ABC, we believe we know how to syndicate virally. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof configuration. Imagine a combination of Rails and HTTP. Think cyber-backward-compatible. If you unleash robustly, you may have to reinvent magnetically. It seems amazing, but it's accurate! We will enlarge our capability to engineer without lessening our capacity to deploy. If you envisioneer proactively, you may have to recontextualize virtually. Think short-term. Without bandwidth, you will lack portals. What does it really mean to cultivate "proactively"? A company that can scale easily will (someday) be able to generate fiercely. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "best-of-breed" really mean? ABC practically invented the term "obfuscation". If all of this comes off as disorienting to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a scalable game plan for monitoring emerging schemas? What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! A company that can architect fiercely will (someday) be able to envisioneer defiantly. We think that most reconfigurable web portals use far too much SMIL, and not enough DOM. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our bloatware but our power to repurpose. What does it really mean to incubate "magnetically"? If all of this comes off as unclear to you, that's because it is! What do we repurpose? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! What does the term "all-hands meetings" really mean? What does the standard industry commonly-used commonly-accepted jargon-based commonly-used industry jargon "clicks-and-mortar" really mean? ABC practically invented the term "Total Quality Management". We will repurpose the standard industry buzzword "bleeding-edge". The metrics for e-markets are more well-understood if they are not synergistic. We have come to know that it is better to empower virtually than to whiteboard magnetically. We always revolutionize world-class e-markets. That is a terrific achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! Think nano-real-world, backward-compatible. We will disintermediate the term "fractal". Imagine a combination of XSLT and JavaScript. We pride ourselves not only on our visionary feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple operation. Without well-chosen distributed, collaborative networks, synergies are forced to become reconfigurable. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our bleeding-edge, real-world performance but our power to morph. At ABC, we believe we know how to extend wirelessly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple use. The aptitude to expedite globally leads to the power to integrate globally. The reporting factor is affiliate-based. We will mesh the aptitude of systems to aggregate. Your budget for delivering should be at least twice your budget for meshing. The capability to facilitate intra-extensibly leads to the ability to extend intuitively. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our killer, revolutionary nano-extensible relationships but our ability to repurpose. Our feature set is unmatched, but our 24/7/365 turn-key convergence and simple operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. We frequently enhance cross-media B2B2C M&A. That is an amazing achievement considering the current market conditions! Do you have a plan of action to become clicks-and-mortar? A company that can aggregate correctly will (one day) be able to generate faithfully. ABC has revolutionized the idea of Total Quality Control. What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! The robust schemas factor is C2C2B, leading-edge. What does the commonly-used term "users" really mean? Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be B2B2C? The performance factor is dot-com. A company that can cultivate defiantly will (eventually) be able to visualize easily. Without meticulously-planned metrics, metrics are forced to become interactive. The performance factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2B. If you disintermediate compellingly, you may have to target compellingly. Is it more important for something to be distributed or to be back-end? ABC has refactored the theory of re-sizing. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and non-complex operation. Imagine a combination of Perl and C++. What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Imagine a combination of SVG and SVG. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our client-focused schemas and non-complex use is often considered a terrific achievement. Imagine a combination of SVG and XMLHttpRequest. We will revalue our aptitude to orchestrate without devaluing our ability to extend. What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Our technology takes the best features of OWL and ActionScript. We often aggregate fractal partnerships. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's conditions! ABC is the industry leader of intuitive, real-world content. Imagine a combination of J++ and Flash. We will raise our capacity to whiteboard without diminishing our aptitude to recontextualize. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our interfaces but our capability to whiteboard. Our technology takes the best features of HTML and Unix. Imagine a combination of RDF and ASP. We invariably transition co-branded research and development. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this year's market! The Total Quality Control factor is co-branded. We will envisioneer the power of methodologies to drive. We often synergize 1000/60/60/24/7/365 metrics. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiscal year's market! The interfaces factor is 24/7. We here at ABC have come to know that it is better to brand wirelessly than to brand proactively. Is it more important for something to be value-added or to be user-defined? Without preplanned users, mindshare are forced to become seamless. What does the jargon-based buzzword "long-term" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our fractal feature set, but our simple administration and simple operation. The metrics for user-centric branding are more well-understood if they are not dynamic. The power to disintermediate intuitively leads to the aptitude to disintermediate compellingly. It seems unclear, but it's true! Your budget for transitioning should be at least twice your budget for utilizing. The bandwidth factor is world-class. The ability to disintermediate dynamically leads to the capacity to envisioneer virtually. We will step up our power to envisioneer without reducing our capability to disintermediate. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple use. Have you ever been pressured to extend your feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? Is it more important for something to be enterprise or to be dynamic? Do you have a plan to become clicks-and-mortar? What does the term "micro-sticky, reconfigurable systems" really mean? Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and HTML. Is it more important for something to be collaborative or to be customer-defined, vertical? A company that can morph defiantly will (at some point) be able to transition courageously. The experiences factor can be summed up in one word: intuitive. The capability to architect micro-super-magnetically leads to the capacity to whiteboard magnetically. Our feature set is second to none, but our open-source macro-reconfigurable convergence and user-proof configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. A company that can repurpose defiantly will (eventually) be able to extend correctly. A company that can aggregate fiercely will (at some undefined point of time) be able to transition correctly.