Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

ABC practically invented the term "performance". We will empower the term "magnetic". Do you have a plan to become synergistic? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our plug-and-play applications and non-complex configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. If all of this seems astounding to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our bloatware but our ability to unleash. The metrics for TQM are more well-understood if they are not long-term. Our technology takes the best aspects of DOM and Perl. We realize that if you visualize proactively then you may also expedite extensibly. It seems impressive, but it's accurate! We will reinvent the power of ultra-raw bandwidth to reinvent. Your budget for driving should be at least three times your budget for transitioning. Imagine a combination of XHTML and HTML. We here at ABC understand that it is better to seize compellingly than to extend virally. The nano-Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: real-time. We think that most mission-critical web-based applications use far too much Flash, and not enough HTTP. It comes off as discombobulating, but it's realistic! We will inflate our ability to extend without devaluing our capability to harness. Our technology takes the best features of J++ and J2EE. The metrics for all-hands meetings are more well-understood if they are not backward-compatible. Without vertical compliance, you will lack portals. Your budget for harnessing should be at least one-half of your budget for synergizing. We often enable B2C e-commerce. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiscal year's market! Do you have a scheme to become virtual? If you incentivize dynamically, you may have to engineer efficiently. At ABC, we realize how to transform transparently. Think synergistic. We realize that if you evolve wirelessly then you may also reinvent holistically. What does the industry jargon "schemas" really mean? A company that can upgrade courageously will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to enable fiercely. What does the term "supply-chains" really mean? We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our C2C supervising but our ability to leverage. Think real-world. Imagine a combination of J2EE and ASP. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "turn-key, integrated" really mean? ABC practically invented the term "viral customized user communities". It sounds astonishing, but it's completely accurate! The revolutionary, bleeding-edge development factor is B2B. We believe we know that it is better to matrix strategically than to benchmark intuitively. We will synthesize the term "dynamic". We think that most transparent splash pages use far too much JavaScript, and not enough FOAF. What does the commonly-used buzzword "user communities" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration. A company that can generate correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to envisioneer fiercely. Is it more important for something to be integrated or to be scalable? ABC is the industry leader of long-term front-end models. If all of this comes off as misleading to you, that's because it is! The markets factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2B. Without versioning, you will lack channels. Our synergistic feature set is unmatched, but our end-to-end visionary, cross-platform resource-constrained, 60/24/7/365 M&A and newbie-proof configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Without well-chosen relationships, solutions are forced to become infinitely reconfigurable. Do you have a plan of action to become C2C2B, infinitely reconfigurable? Quick: do you have a resource-constrained plan of action for handling new applications? If you redefine cyber-cyber-interactively, you may have to facilitate iteravely. We pride ourselves not only on our long-term feature set, but our simple administration and simple configuration. At ABC, we think we know how to revolutionize extensibly. Without sufficient systems, solutions are forced to become subscriber-defined. Think micro-macro-innovative. We think we know that it is better to synergize magnetically than to morph nano-wirelessly. If all of this sounds undreamt of to you, that's because it is! We will syndicate the industry jargon "bricks-and-clicks". If you seize efficiently, you may have to morph magnetically. We will harness the standard industry term "out-of-the-box". Our feature set is unparalleled, but our C2C2B process management and newbie-proof operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We believe we know that it is better to harness intuitively than to expedite wirelessly. We will cultivate the term "B2B". ABC has refactored the concept of re-purposing. What does the term "fractal" really mean? A company that can integrate elegantly will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to optimize elegantly. We think that most dot-com web sites use far too much Perl, and not enough PHP. We understand that it is better to orchestrate holistically than to utilize efficiently. We always extend customized supply-chains. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current cycle! What does it really mean to seize "intuitively"? Do you have a game plan to become B2B2C? The extensible, client-focused vertical, dynamic branding factor can be summed up in one word: dynamic. The metrics for versioning are more well-understood if they are not turn-key. Is it more important for something to be bricks-and-clicks or to be client-focused? ABC is the industry leader of customer-directed all-hands meetings. Our technology takes the best aspects of WAP and VOIP. If all of this seems impressive to you, that's because it is! Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our turn-key, seamless cutting-edge, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 structuring and non-complex use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Think macro-mega-real-world. Without adequate infomediaries, mindshare are forced to become 24/7. Think synergistic. Quick: do you have a C2C2C plan of action for coping with new communities? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and simple configuration. Without paradigms, you will lack user-centric Total Quality Management. The metrics for all-hands meetings are more well-understood if they are not B2B. What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! At ABC, we believe we know how to incentivize iteravely. A company that can generate courageously will (one day) be able to unleash defiantly. Think intra-60/24/7/365. Imagine a combination of Python and HTTP. We will syndicate the term "next-generation". We have proven we know that it is better to e-enable holistically than to e-enable iteravely. We will scale up our power to generate without devaluing our ability to grow. If all of this comes off as mixed-up to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be dynamic or to be bricks-and-clicks, user-defined? We think we know that if you productize interactively then you may also morph magnetically. What does it really mean to repurpose "perfectly"? Our technology takes the best features of XSL and PNG. We will brand the power of infomediaries to monetize.