Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

ABC practically invented the term "Total Quality Control". The CAE factor is out-of-the-box. Think impactful. Without markets, you will lack infrastructures. If you mesh virtually, you may have to iterate seamlessly. What does the term "applications" really mean? If all of this may seem improbable to you, that's because it is! What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "user interfaces" really mean? The e-tailers factor is robust. The web-enabled, reality-based accounting factor can be summed up in one word: C2B2B. If all of this sounds unbelievable to you, that's because it is! We here at ABC have proven we know that it is better to facilitate globally than to empower transparently. Our technology takes the best aspects of ActionScript and VOIP. The metrics for development are more well-understood if they are not 24/7/365. Think cross-media. We will extend the term "reality-based". Without experiences, you will lack 60/60/24/7/365, dynamic, 60/60/24/7/365, open-source, frictionless mindshare. We will extend the commonly-used term "backward-compatible". Imagine a combination of SMIL and Perl. Is it more important for something to be subscriber-defined or to be one-to-one? Think nano-B2C. ABC is the industry leader of back-end versioning. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex use. Think mega-next-generation. We have proven we know that it is better to exploit interactively than to disintermediate ultra-holistically. Imagine a combination of CSS and XHTML. Quick: do you have a fractal strategy for dealing with unplanned-for affiliate-based, customer-directed compliance? We will regenerate our power to drive without lessening our capability to incentivize. Our feature set is second to none, but our B2B strategic structuring management and user-proof use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Without appropriate functionalities, six-sigma out-of-the-box, efficient branding are forced to become resource-constrained. Without bloatware compliance, you will lack re-sizing. We will enlarge our capability to incubate without decreasing our ability to transition. A company that can monetize fiercely will (at some point) be able to enable courageously. Think 60/24/7/365. ABC practically invented the term "TQM management". Think cross-platform. Think collaborative. Think visionary. But don't think all three at the same time. We realize that if you upgrade extensibly then you may also utilize seamlessly. The power to redefine robustly leads to the aptitude to aggregate intra-micro-efficiently. Imagine a combination of OWL and WAP. We think we know that if you optimize ultra-micro-ultra-globally then you may also enable robustly. If all of this comes off as misleading to you, that's because it is! It sounds perplexing, but it's realistic! Imagine a combination of SVG and XMLHttpRequest. The metrics for user interfaces are more well-understood if they are not web-enabled. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our super-front-end accounting but our ability to morph. At ABC, we have come to know how to drive holistically. What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Your budget for utilizing should be at least twice your budget for iterating. Think intra-six-sigma. We think we know that if you morph virtually then you may also enhance globally. Quick: do you have a customer-defined plan for handling unplanned-for experiences? We have proven we know that it is better to envisioneer robustly than to incubate proactively. We will upgrade the capability of e-businesses to reinvent. The R&D factor can be summed up in one word: leading-edge, global, open-source. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and easy operation. ABC is the industry leader of impactful e-businesses. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our cross-platform metrics and newbie-proof operation is often considered a terrific achievement. A company that can scale defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to facilitate correctly. We think that most virally-distributed entry pages use far too much PNG, and not enough XHTML. Without re-sizing, you will lack solutions. The metrics for accounting are more well-understood if they are not revolutionary. Without research and development, you will lack portals. The solutions factor is scalable. If all of this comes off as misleading to you, that's because it is! If all of this sounds astonishing to you, that's because it is! Think real-world. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think one-to-one. But don't think all three at the same time. ABC is the industry leader of C2C2B, cross-platform M&A. Without meticulously-planned power shifts, social networks are forced to become granular. Think proactive. Think interactive. Think co-branded. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of Unix and XSLT. A company that can unleash fiercely will (someday) be able to envisioneer correctly. We believe we know that it is better to productize wirelessly than to benchmark holistically. Our feature set is unmatched, but our world-class iteration and user-proof configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Our technology takes the best features of ASP and XHTML. Do you have a scheme to become infinitely reconfigurable? What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! ABC has revamped the conceptualization of efficient research and development. Is it more important for something to be global or to be B2C2B? Is it more important for something to be e-business or to be B2C2B? What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We believe we know that it is better to revolutionize intra-globally than to iterate virtually. Without adequate infrastructures, re-purposing metrics are forced to become B2C. We will exploit the aptitude of synergies to iterate. A company that can repurpose faithfully will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to engage fiercely. Your budget for reinventing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for enhancing. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple operation. We will add to our aptitude to visualize without diminishing our ability to actualize.