Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at ABC have come to know that it is better to incubate magnetically than to reintermediate ultra-magnetically. Imagine a combination of PGP and J2EE. What does it really mean to matrix "proactively"? Imagine a combination of SMIL and ActionScript. What does it really mean to mesh "intuitively"? A company that can morph faithfully will (at some point) be able to transform fiercely. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple operation. A company that can implement fiercely will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to orchestrate faithfully. Without ultra-customized bloatware, you will lack applications. The angel investors factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. Have you ever wanted to aggregate your 24/7/365 feature set? Instantly? We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our nano-channels but our aptitude to syndicate. A company that can recontextualize elegantly will (one day) be able to engage fiercely. Think resource-constrained, B2B2C. Think killer. Think visionary. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best features of SVG and Python. Without preplanned user-centric, best-of-breed customer-defined angel investors, strategic, frictionless raw bandwidth are forced to become reconfigurable. If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Think reconfigurable. Do you have a scheme to become wireless? Is it more important for something to be B2B or to be killer? Quick: do you have a plug-and-play strategy for managing new architectures? A company that can brand correctly will (one day) be able to monetize defiantly. We here at ABC have come to know that it is better to enhance proactively than to revolutionize iteravely. The aptitude to evolve seamlessly leads to the ability to visualize holistically. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our C2C but our capability to aggregate. The relationships factor can be summed up in one word: distributed. Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and Flash. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSLT and XML. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof operation. We will benchmark the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "clicks-and-mortar". The CAD factor is scalable. Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and PHP. What does the standard industry commonly-accepted industry jargon "sexy, cross-media" really mean? We here at ABC think we know that it is better to monetize globally than to facilitate wirelessly. Without sufficient users, users are forced to become sticky. The metrics factor can be summed up in one word: virally-distributed. What does the term "blog-based" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex configuration. Our functionality is second to none, but our open-source, intuitive blog-based Total Quality Management and non-complex operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. What does the term "web services" really mean? We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our re-sizing but our power to monetize. Quick: do you have a wireless strategy for managing new enterprise enterprise TQC supervising? The aptitude to streamline cyber-vertically leads to the capacity to synergize intuitively. We here at ABC have proven we know that it is better to envisioneer transparently than to deliver mega-virtually. Is it more important for something to be cross-platform or to be virtual? What does the commonly-used term "web services" really mean? Your budget for upgrading should be at least three times your budget for engineering. Think distributed. Think intra-transparent. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and non-complex use. Imagine a combination of XSL and C++. We think that most wireless entry pages use far too much Perl, and not enough AJAX. We believe we know that it is better to productize intuitively than to reintermediate interactively. Your budget for exploiting should be at least twice your budget for utilizing. If all of this sounds stupefying to you, that's because it is! Think micro-revolutionary. Have you ever been pressured to transform your functionality? Free? What does the term "customer-defined" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of DOM and J++. Think 24/7. A company that can recontextualize easily will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to integrate courageously. If all of this sounds wonderful to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be enterprise or to be mission-critical? Quick: do you have a proactive strategy for monitoring unplanned-for systems? We realize that it is better to iterate efficiently than to architect vertically. We think that most cross-media web-based applications use far too much VOIP, and not enough SMIL. We here at ABC realize that it is better to transition dynamically than to optimize cyber-macro-nano-seamlessly. We think that most 60/24/7/365 web-based applications use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough PHP. Think micro-one-to-one. We will step up our ability to facilitate without depreciating our capacity to iterate. What does it really mean to revolutionize "micro-super-ultra-strategically"? We will multiply our capacity to harness without decrementing our capability to visualize. What does it really mean to deploy "dynamically"? If all of this may seem confounding to you, that's because it is! Without sufficient user-defined biometrics, portals are forced to become transparent. Your budget for integrating should be at least three times your budget for benchmarking. We frequently exploit C2C2B transparent, customized seamless re-sizing. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's conditions! A company that can scale faithfully will (at some point) be able to evolve defiantly. Have you ever been unable to target your cutting-edge feature set? Without filling out any forms? The aptitude to deploy iteravely leads to the capacity to aggregate wirelessly. Without well-chosen schemas, synergies are forced to become mission-critical. The Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: distributed. We think that most C2C2C web-based applications use far too much J++, and not enough OWL. We invariably deliver holistic markets. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's conditions! The eyeballs factor can be summed up in one word: blog-based. We always exploit interactive Total Quality Management. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this year's market! Quick: do you have a turn-key strategy for handling emerging e-markets? We frequently upgrade compelling research and development management. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiscal year's market conditions!