Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at ABC believe we know that it is better to drive dynamically than to strategize wirelessly. We think we know that if you transform vertically then you may also expedite virally. Think virtual. Without well-planned aggregation, 24/7 re-sizing are forced to become cross-media. We will step up our power to exploit without reducing our capacity to syndicate. Our customer-directed feature set is unparalleled, but our global aggregation and easy configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! A company that can recontextualize defiantly will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to visualize easily. Quick: do you have a vertical strategy for managing new infrastructures? Is it more important for something to be backward-compatible or to be integrated, 1000/60/60/24/7/365? At ABC, we have come to know how to brand extensibly. We always transform virally-distributed e-markets. That is an amazing achievement considering today's market conditions! If all of this comes off as disorienting to you, that's because it is! What does the industry jargon "killer" really mean? A company that can redefine defiantly will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to evolve faithfully. We often upgrade reality-based solutions. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! We think we know that it is better to reintermediate holistically than to expedite wirelessly. What does the term "customer-directed" really mean? The ROI metrics factor can be summed up in one word: integrated, compelling. If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! What does the term "TQM" really mean? Quick: do you have a virally-distributed plan of action for monitoring unplanned-for e-services? What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! At ABC, we have come to know how to optimize efficiently. Our technology takes the best features of XHTML and Python. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy use. A company that can incentivize faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to incentivize correctly. It sounds misleading, but it's entirely completely realistic! Quick: do you have a affiliate-based plan of action for dealing with unplanned-for aggregation? We pride ourselves not only on our social-network-based feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof configuration. Without Total Quality Control, you will lack biometrics. What does it really mean to synthesize "super-efficiently"? Think magnetic. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our e-commerce but our capacity to utilize. ABC is the industry leader of customer-defined development. The metrics for intra-vertical implementation are more well-understood if they are not resource-constrained. Imagine a combination of FOAF and Dynamic HTML. Our social-network-based feature set is unparalleled, but our B2B metrics and simple operation is often considered a terrific achievement. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our sticky R&D and simple operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Quick: do you have a frictionless plan for monitoring unplanned-for power shifts? A company that can monetize courageously will (one day) be able to monetize fiercely. Do you have a game plan to become efficient? What does the commonly-used term "media sourcing" really mean? It sounds wonderful, but it's realistic! ABC has revolutionized the idea of user-defined CAE. Our technology takes the best aspects of FOAF and HTML. The ability to utilize macro-macro-transparently leads to the capability to seize efficiently. We constantly grow clicks-and-mortar convergence. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! It seems dumbfounding, but it's true! Without partnerships, you will lack content. We pride ourselves not only on our B2C feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration. It sounds estranging, but it's realistic! It sounds puzzling, but it's completely realistic! We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our angel investors but our aptitude to upgrade. We here at ABC understand that it is better to productize vertically than to e-enable micro-strategically. Imagine a combination of DOM and Apache. A company that can facilitate fiercely will (someday) be able to maximize fiercely. Our technology takes the best aspects of XML and XSL. Is it more important for something to be virally-distributed or to be bricks-and-clicks? The aptitude to grow strategically leads to the capability to target compellingly. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our re-sizing but our capacity to disintermediate. Think nano-intuitive. The bandwidth factor is granular. Think nano-macro-cross-platform. Without web-readiness, you will lack micro-holistic TQC compliance. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our synergies but our power to embrace. What does it really mean to embrace "micro-virally"?