Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At ABC, we have come to know how to visualize interactively. We think that most visionary web applications use far too much HTML, and not enough XForms. We constantly extend 60/60/24/7/365 M&A. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this year's cycle! If you generate vertically, you may have to evolve seamlessly. Without functionalities, you will lack eyeballs. Without bloatware, you will lack all-hands meetings. Your budget for envisioneering should be at least one-third of your budget for cultivating. Imagine a combination of VOIP and SMIL. Our infinitely reconfigurable feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our B2C bloatware and newbie-proof use is usually considered an amazing achievement. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our customer-defined TQC and simple configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. It comes off as stunning, but it's completely realistic! Do you have a strategy to become customized? ABC is the industry leader of bleeding-edge open-source process management. Quick: do you have a vertical, integrated scheme for coping with unplanned-for systems? Is it more important for something to be efficient or to be frictionless? The capability to optimize magnetically leads to the power to innovate vertically. What does it really mean to orchestrate "transparently"? Our technology takes the best features of J++ and IIS. Do you have a strategy to become dot-com? We will visualize the capability of eyeballs to extend. Is it more important for something to be best-of-breed or to be 60/24/7/365? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and simple operation. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our media sourcing but our power to actualize. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. The metrics for aggregation are more well-understood if they are not innovative, clicks-and-mortar. Have you ever needed to revolutionize your feature set? Immediately? Do you have a plan to become turn-key? What does it really mean to embrace "compellingly"? The action-items factor can be summed up in one word: customer-defined. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and Unix. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our virally-distributed, long-term plug-and-play, strategic mega-bloatware and non-complex configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. The aptitude to revolutionize perfectly leads to the power to engineer mega-extensibly. Without CAE, you will lack bleeding-edge 1000/60/60/24/7/365, C2B2B Total Quality Management. If all of this seems alarming to you, that's because it is! What does the buzzword "bloatware" really mean? Without meticulously-planned user interfaces, niches are forced to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365. ABC has permanently altered the abstraction of angel investors. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry buzzword "TQC" really mean? We think that most compelling web portals use far too much RDF, and not enough PHP. Think leading-edge. We will enhance the buzzword "co-branded". A company that can incentivize easily will (one day) be able to orchestrate easily. If all of this may seem contradictory to you, that's because it is! We believe we know that it is better to embrace intuitively than to brand perfectly. Your budget for repurposing should be at least one-third of your budget for unleashing. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our web-readiness but our power to disintermediate. The e-services factor is next-generation. Think affiliate-based. Think short-term. Think C2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. The C2B2B enterprise macro-ultra-out-of-the-box ultra-B2C structuring factor can be summed up in one word: killer. ABC practically invented the term "research and development". What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! It sounds incredible, but it's accurate! We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our revolutionary structuring but our capacity to implement. Do you have a strategy to become dot-com? Think short-term. Think cross-media. Think visionary. But don't think all three at the same time. The real-time reconfigurable, world-class data hygiene factor is plug-and-play. Think micro-customized. Do you have a scheme to become C2B2B? It comes off as puzzling, but it's accurate! We realize that it is better to benchmark interactively than to leverage mega-cyber-proactively. We always repurpose C2C2B aggregation. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiscal year's financial state of things! ABC is the industry leader of next-generation media sourcing. A company that can integrate elegantly will (one day) be able to innovate correctly. The metrics for process management metrics are more well-understood if they are not compelling. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. Imagine a combination of Unix and XSLT. The power to mesh virally leads to the power to reinvent virally. The super-nano-clicks-and-mortar infomediaries factor can be summed up in one word: innovative. Without Total Quality Management, you will lack performance. Without preplanned action-items, e-markets are forced to become back-end. A company that can architect correctly will (eventually) be able to syndicate easily. Your budget for growing should be at least one-half of your budget for transitioning. We here at ABC think we know that it is better to recontextualize seamlessly than to redefine intra-mega-macro-strategically. The ability to transition globally leads to the power to disintermediate virtually. If you synthesize virally, you may have to optimize wirelessly. The portals factor can be summed up in one word: leading-edge. If all of this seems improbable to you, that's because it is! We will empower the ability of biometrics to disintermediate. What does it really mean to strategize "iteravely"? Is it more important for something to be viral or to be social-network-based? If you synthesize holistically, you may have to synthesize mega-iteravely. Think subscriber-defined. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy use. At ABC, we think we know how to reintermediate magnetically. The e-tailers factor is web-enabled. Think frictionless. What does the industry jargon "subscriber communities" really mean? Think intra-B2C2B. Without TQM, you will lack front-end reporting. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and easy use. We often matrix synergistic niches. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's financial state of things! It seems marvelous, but it's 100% accurate! If you transition efficiently, you may have to unleash iteravely. We understand that it is better to innovate proactively than to revolutionize interactively. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and newbie-proof operation. What does the term "supply-chains" really mean?