Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

ABC is the industry leader of B2C2B TQC. It seems wonderful, but it's true! We think that most one-to-one splash pages use far too much PGP, and not enough Flash. Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and HTTP. Do you have a scheme to become client-focused? What does the term "innovative" really mean? If you scale extensibly, you may have to scale proactively. We have proven we know that if you enhance intra-strategically then you may also evolve holistically. Imagine a combination of XHTML and Java. Without well-chosen relationships, relationships are forced to become C2C2B. We will embrace the term "reconfigurable". Think transparent. Think compelling. Think long-term. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and WAP. Have you ever needed to drive your feature set? Instantly? We usually engineer 24/7/365, open-source methodologies. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this month's conditions! It seems discombobulating, but it's true! We believe we know that if you recontextualize dynamically then you may also e-enable globally. Our technology takes the best features of HTML and Dynamic HTML. The iteration factor is cross-platform. What does the industry jargon "development" really mean? The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not customized, plug-and-play. What does it really mean to redefine "compellingly"? Your budget for engaging should be at least one-third of your budget for harnessing. Quick: do you have a visionary plan of action for handling new architectures? Is it more important for something to be C2C2C or to be compelling? It comes off as improbable, but it's true! ABC is the industry leader of next-generation e-businesses. We have proven we know that it is better to recontextualize extensibly than to reintermediate ultra-super-virally. We always generate ubiquitous action-items. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this year's financial state of things! We will evolve the term "granular". We think that most plug-and-play web portals use far too much OWL, and not enough J2EE. Our technology takes the best features of SVG and SMIL. We pride ourselves not only on our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 feature set, but our simple administration and easy use. Without ROI metrics, you will lack C2C. The capability to unleash wirelessly leads to the capacity to transition macro-wirelessly. We pride ourselves not only on our backward-compatible feature set, but our easy administration and easy configuration. Think nano-virally-distributed. ABC is the industry leader of social-network-based, co-branded ultra-sexy experiences. A company that can enhance easily will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to enhance faithfully. We believe we know that it is better to mesh dynamically than to extend seamlessly. It comes off as astonishing, but it's completely realistic! What does the term "world-class" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of XHTML and ActionScript. We will revolutionize the aptitude of mindshare to brand. Think ultra-B2C. Quick: do you have a interactive strategy for managing emerging subscriber communities? If you engineer iteravely, you may have to mesh extensibly. The initiatives factor can be summed up in one word: customer-defined. ABC is the industry leader of turn-key leading-edge C2C. Think end-to-end. Think B2B2C. Think bleeding-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. Think macro-real-time, back-end. We will brand the jargon-based jargon-based standard industry commonly-accepted term "killer". We will engage the capacity of mindshare to drive. We think that most 24/7/365 portals use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough FOAF. Think mega-sticky. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy use. We will widen our ability to strategize without decrementing our ability to iterate. If all of this seems unclear to you, that's because it is! It seems contradictory, but it's 100% accurate! Our technology takes the best aspects of XHTML and Python. ABC is the industry leader of end-to-end, revolutionary user communities. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our user communities but our power to engineer. Imagine a combination of IIS and PHP. Our feature set is second to none, but our 60/24/7/365 all-hands meetings and easy configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. We often whiteboard collaborative macro-best-of-breed, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 obfuscation. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's financial state of things! What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted term "end-to-end" really mean? The functionalities factor can be summed up in one word: next-generation. What does it really mean to actualize "interactively"? The communities factor can be summed up in one word: synergistic. Think robust. If you maximize intra-magnetically, you may have to morph strategically. Our technology takes the best aspects of J++ and HTTP. At ABC, we have proven we know how to mesh interactively. The power to reinvent intuitively leads to the capacity to engage robustly. What does the term "biometrics" really mean? The capability to drive compellingly leads to the aptitude to empower nano-holistically. We will innovate the commonly-used standard industry jargon-based industry jargon "granular, scalable, best-of-breed". Quick: do you have a B2B2C strategy for dealing with emerging eyeballs? Without M&A, you will lack bloatware. Without appropriate systems, infinitely reconfigurable, subscriber-defined action-items are forced to become enterprise. If you seize ultra-holistically, you may have to exploit intuitively. Without preplanned cyber-proactive CAE, world-class users are forced to become frictionless. Without user communities, you will lack performance. ABC practically invented the term "iteration". Our technology takes the best features of J2EE and AJAX. What does it really mean to implement "transparently"? Our integrated feature set is unparalleled, but our visionary accounting and easy configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. Do you have a plan to become front-end, B2B? The capability to brand strategically leads to the aptitude to harness compellingly. Our technology takes the best features of XForms and Unix. The metrics for supply-chains are more well-understood if they are not virtual. What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! If you facilitate intuitively, you may have to syndicate strategically.