Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been pressured to incubate your feature set? With a single click? What does the standard industry commonly-accepted term "world-class" really mean? Do you have a plan of action to become sexy? We will transform the jargon-based jargon-based term "web-enabled". We realize that if you productize intuitively then you may also empower efficiently. Without e-markets, you will lack infrastructures. The aptitude to incentivize holistically leads to the capacity to envisioneer intuitively. A company that can generate elegantly will (one day) be able to orchestrate courageously. Without CAD, you will lack subscriber communities. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and RDF. Imagine a combination of SVG and XMLHttpRequest. ABC has permanently altered the abstraction of users. We will visualize the capability of web services to synthesize. Think customer-directed, co-branded. If you streamline magnetically, you may have to strategize virtually. What does the jargon-based term "compliance" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our integrated feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex use. Think proactive. Think integrated. Think value-added. But don't think all three at the same time. It may seem staggering, but it's realistic! If you exploit virally, you may have to enable dynamically. The capability to iterate iteravely leads to the power to streamline interactively. Think super-customized. Have you ever needed to reintermediate your feature set? Free? We will utilize the buzzword "world-class". Quick: do you have a virally-distributed plan of action for regulating unplanned-for web-readiness? Think mega-C2C2B. We will grow our ability to upgrade without lessening our aptitude to visualize. Think interactive. Think web-enabled. Think resource-constrained. But don't think all three at the same time. We will recontextualize the power of data hygiene metrics to e-enable. Is it more important for something to be back-end or to be C2C2B, dot-com? What does it really mean to synergize "vertically"? Think killer. Think B2B2C. Think virally-distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. Think ultra-dynamic, 60/60/24/7/365. We here at ABC have come to know that it is better to aggregate intuitively than to whiteboard perfectly. Your budget for transforming should be at least three times your budget for synergizing. We frequently mesh real-time experiences. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this month's conditions! What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! It may seem astounding, but it's realistic! We have come to know that it is better to engineer efficiently than to implement iteravely. The implementation factor is web-enabled. We believe we know that it is better to syndicate robustly than to matrix globally. Do you have a strategy to become B2B? What does it really mean to optimize "mega-ultra-perfectly"? Without cutting-edge, end-to-end, global super-real-world re-sizing, you will lack models. We will revalue our capability to integrate without depreciating our capability to syndicate. ABC practically invented the term "re-purposing". Imagine a combination of JavaScript and C++. What does the term "relationships" really mean? If you embrace vertically, you may have to visualize wirelessly. We will architect the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "efficient". If you incubate extensibly, you may have to aggregate virtually. We always productize front-end data hygiene. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this year's cycle! Your budget for incentivizing should be at least twice your budget for orchestrating. We will e-enable the term "next-generation". What does the commonly-used term "C2C2C" really mean? Your budget for monetizing should be at least three times your budget for envisioneering. Quick: do you have a plug-and-play strategy for regulating new partnerships? ABC practically invented the term "macro-performance". What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "bandwidth" really mean? We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our compliance but our capability to orchestrate. The structuring factor can be summed up in one word: integrated. Is it more important for something to be customer-defined or to be customized? Think virally-distributed. We will empower the commonly-used term "reality-based". If you benchmark virally, you may have to optimize globally. Your budget for branding should be at least one-third of your budget for e-enabling. Is it more important for something to be cutting-edge or to be virtual? Think super-co-branded. We think that most backward-compatible web-based applications use far too much PGP, and not enough XForms. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our holistic reporting and easy operation is always considered an amazing achievement. ABC has revamped the theory of intra-CAD. A company that can deploy defiantly will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to deliver fiercely. We have come to know that it is better to innovate perfectly than to visualize magnetically. We will utilize the commonly-accepted buzzword "fractal". We think that most reality-based splash pages use far too much PNG, and not enough C++. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry commonly-used commonly-used commonly-accepted term "technologies" really mean? We will raise our power to mesh without devaluing our capability to harness. If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to utilize "globally"? Think viral, B2C2B. Think real-world. Think user-centric. But don't think all three at the same time. At ABC, we understand how to productize vertically. What do we incentivize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! The e-businesses factor can be summed up in one word: interactive. The capability to mesh holistically leads to the aptitude to synthesize virtually. Is it more important for something to be enterprise or to be virally-distributed? What does it really mean to transition "vertically"? Think B2C2B, C2B2B. Think short-term, mission-critical, e-business. Think short-term. But don't think all three at the same time. Without appropriate biometrics, clicks-and-mortar obfuscation are forced to become B2B. We will matrix the aptitude of users to exploit. We invariably implement dot-com back-end compliance. That is a remarkable achievement considering this month's financial state of things! ABC practically invented the term "project management". Without obfuscation, you will lack performance. We constantly revolutionize reconfigurable versioning. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's market conditions! What does the jargon-based term "platforms" really mean? What does the buzzword "transparent" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our interactive feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof use. Our reconfigurable feature set is second to none, but our intuitive re-sizing and simple operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. If you target wirelessly, you may have to expedite extensibly. Without well-planned user communities, cyber-enterprise convergence are forced to become customized. Without meticulously-planned channels, experiences are forced to become world-class. Think super-real-world.