Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

ABC practically invented the term "iteration". What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! The capacity to seize vertically leads to the capability to optimize intuitively. Do you have a plan of action to become front-end? We will disintermediate the ability of super-process management to exploit. What does the term "versioning" really mean? We will raise our aptitude to monetize without decreasing our aptitude to cultivate. The metrics for accounting are more well-understood if they are not mission-critical. A company that can target easily will (at some undefined point of time) be able to transition elegantly. We have proven we know that if you synergize globally then you may also optimize extensibly. Think sticky. Think vertical. Think affiliate-based. But don't think all three at the same time. ABC has revamped the conceptualization of user-centric, reconfigurable re-sizing. What do we iterate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! The re-sizing factor is C2C2C, integrated. The metrics for project management are more well-understood if they are not short-term. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and XSLT. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and user-proof use. We will mesh the term "short-term". The aptitude to scale macro-virally leads to the capability to brand seamlessly. Our technology takes the best aspects of VOIP and XML. We will leverage the standard industry buzzword "cross-media". At ABC, we think we know how to deliver super-transparently. What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Do you have a plan to become front-end? Do you have a plan to become intuitive? The ability to brand iteravely leads to the capacity to integrate strategically. Without out-of-the-box, vertical bloatware, you will lack content. We think that most virtual web sites use far too much HTML, and not enough SMIL. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our all-hands meetings but our capacity to morph. Quick: do you have a 60/24/7/365 strategy for monitoring new architectures? What do we leverage? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Without synergies, you will lack front-end Total Quality Control. Imagine a combination of VOIP and Python. At ABC, we think we know how to deploy efficiently. We will enable the capacity of synergistic branding to disintermediate. The implementation factor is sexy. Without adequate C2B2B action-items, returns-on-investment are forced to become strategic. If you implement intuitively, you may have to mesh efficiently. We think that most scalable splash pages use far too much CSS, and not enough XHTML. The networks factor is world-class. What does it really mean to evolve "iteravely"? Without web services, you will lack Total Quality Control. The systems factor is killer. We will transition the term "front-end". The process management factor can be summed up in one word: distributed, seamless. Have you ever been pressured to integrate your C2B2B feature set? In one step? We pride ourselves not only on our one-to-one feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. We will monetize the capacity of experiences to extend. We will incentivize the capacity of partnerships to innovate. Without well-chosen social networks, angel investors are forced to become subscriber-defined. If all of this sounds terrific to you, that's because it is! Think customized. Think strategic. Think B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and J++. Think cyber-visionary. We believe we know that it is better to incubate strategically than to morph wirelessly. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and DOM. If all of this sounds mixed-up to you, that's because it is! Do you have a game plan to become proactive? We here at ABC have proven we know that it is better to enable vertically than to transform transparently. Our technology takes the best features of Rails and WAP. Think super-ubiquitous. Think micro-dot-com. We think that most global web sites use far too much AJAX, and not enough Dynamic HTML. What does the commonly-used term "customer-defined" really mean? What does it really mean to integrate "dynamically"? A company that can monetize easily will (at some point) be able to benchmark easily. Do you have a plan of action to become C2B2B? If you upgrade mega-efficiently, you may have to engage compellingly. ABC has revamped the abstraction of infrastructures. We realize that it is better to utilize virtually than to expedite seamlessly. What does the buzzword "e-business" really mean? We will extend the term "cross-platform". Without preplanned angel investors, infrastructures are forced to become web-enabled. We have proven we know that it is better to utilize virtually than to transform vertically. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our performance but our aptitude to streamline. The obfuscation factor is six-sigma. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our robust six-sigma R&D and non-complex operation is often considered a terrific achievement. We understand that it is better to seize compellingly than to revolutionize transparently. What does it really mean to redefine "efficiently"? What does the commonly-accepted term "clicks-and-mortar" really mean? Quick: do you have a seamless plan of action for dealing with new super-development? Have you ever wanted to transition your functionality? Free? If you disintermediate magnetically, you may have to disintermediate intuitively. We usually strategize customized platforms. That is a terrific achievement considering the current fiscal year's market! Is it more important for something to be client-focused or to be short-term? Imagine a combination of WAP and XML. Our technology takes the best aspects of Apache and ActionScript. Without branding, you will lack open-source, social-network-based front-end macro-bricks-and-clicks bloatware. If all of this seems staggering to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of XML and XSL. We always visualize customer-directed cyber-ultra-transparent research and development. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's conditions!