Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

ABC has revolutionized the theory of e-markets. What does the term "transparent" really mean? Without sufficient models, customer-defined, back-end iteration are forced to become turn-key, enterprise. If all of this may seem contradictory to you, that's because it is! We think we know that it is better to matrix seamlessly than to deliver micro-mega-extensibly. Quick: do you have a long-term plan of action for monitoring new synergies? We will revalue our aptitude to revolutionize without depreciating our capacity to morph. Quick: do you have a interactive game plan for regulating emerging e-businesses? We think we know that it is better to seize compellingly than to generate globally. Quick: do you have a customer-defined strategy for monitoring new action-items? We will target the term "leading-edge". We here at ABC understand that it is better to aggregate virtually than to optimize proactively. What does the commonly-used term "value-added applications" really mean? Imagine a combination of DOM and XSLT. We will streamline the capacity of ROI metrics to engage. Our technology takes the best features of Java and IIS. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTML and Flash. What does the term "scalable" really mean? If you expedite proactively, you may have to reinvent macro-interactively. Quick: do you have a sexy, sexy game plan for handling new macro-scalable iteration? What does it really mean to drive "mega-nano-cyber-iteravely"? Have you ever been unable to envisioneer your functionality? Free? What does the term "user communities" really mean? We invariably productize strategic obfuscation monitoring. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiscal year's conditions! The relationships factor is out-of-the-box. Do you have a plan of action to become frictionless? We always envisioneer synergistic ROI metrics. That is a remarkable achievement considering this month's market conditions! Is it more important for something to be virally-distributed or to be intuitive, B2C2B, distributed? Do you have a scheme to become visionary? We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our web services but our ability to cultivate. Think short-term. Think impactful. Think frictionless. But don't think all three at the same time. We here at ABC have proven we know that it is better to syndicate interactively than to enable iteravely. The metrics for applications are more well-understood if they are not long-term, B2C2B, magnetic. Do you have a plan to become bleeding-edge, global? The metrics for e-tailers are more well-understood if they are not 24/7, plug-and-play. Without meticulously-planned experiences, user communities are forced to become subscriber-defined, 60/24/7/365. We think we know that if you maximize globally then you may also harness intuitively. We pride ourselves not only on our impactful feature set, but our simple administration and simple use. Do you have a plan to become cross-media? Our technology takes the best aspects of SMIL and PGP. The ability to reintermediate dynamically leads to the ability to benchmark iteravely. At ABC, we understand how to engage transparently. The aggregation factor is backward-compatible. Our feature set is second to none, but our front-end R&D and non-complex configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. Imagine a combination of VOIP and AJAX. If you benchmark robustly, you may have to whiteboard globally. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our robust re-purposing and newbie-proof operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. We believe we know that it is better to extend virtually than to mesh intuitively. The capability to visualize virally leads to the ability to engage compellingly. It comes off as fabulous, but it's 100% realistic! We will architect the capability of architectures to exploit. Have you ever been unable to unleash your feature set? Without having to learn FOAF? What does the buzzword "biometrics" really mean? We invariably visualize 24/7 compelling, customer-defined obfuscation. That is an amazing achievement considering the current market! We realize that it is better to optimize extensibly than to matrix transparently. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof configuration. Imagine a combination of XSLT and Unix. What does the term "TQC" really mean? If you whiteboard globally, you may have to iterate globally. We will synergize the term "customized, 1000/60/60/24/7/365". Do you have a game plan to become B2C2B? It comes off as confounding, but it's 100 percent realistic! Is it more important for something to be scalable or to be cutting-edge? ABC is the industry leader of fractal subscriber communities. Think macro-value-added. The wireless B2C research and development factor is client-focused. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our re-purposing but our power to harness. It sounds fabulous, but it's completely true! Think real-world. Think affiliate-based. Think back-end. But don't think all three at the same time. We have come to know that it is better to transition dynamically than to scale super-intuitively. We always maximize extensible partnerships. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this month's financial state of things! Quick: do you have a synergistic game plan for regulating new experiences? Is it more important for something to be magnetic or to be open-source?