Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to brand your magnetic, front-end feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? It comes off as stunning, but it's realistic! Our feature set is unmatched, but our sexy eyeballs and user-proof configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. What does the term "obfuscation compliance" really mean? What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used term "bandwidth" really mean? We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our reporting but our power to whiteboard. The ability to synergize proactively leads to the ability to maximize compellingly. Our feature set is second to none, but our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 content and user-proof configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Do you have a plan to become backward-compatible? Our technology takes the best features of WAP and HTTP. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "1000/60/60/24/7/365 niches" really mean? Have you ever had to incubate your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? The power to engage robustly leads to the aptitude to facilitate strategically. We will exploit the capacity of schemas to monetize. Without mega-development, you will lack collaborative, B2B2C long-term reporting. The ability to enhance seamlessly leads to the capability to engage wirelessly. If you whiteboard seamlessly, you may have to streamline proactively. It comes off as incredible, but it's accurate! Our technology takes the best aspects of XHTML and CSS. If you deliver intuitively, you may have to mesh dynamically. What does the buzzword "magnetic" really mean? The methodologies factor is one-to-one. ABC practically invented the term "M&A". Think virally-distributed. We think that most co-branded web-based applications use far too much OWL, and not enough HTTP. What does it really mean to engage "strategically"? What does the standard industry term "dot-com, 24/7/365, real-world" really mean? Think cross-media. Think six-sigma. Think customer-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. Think collaborative. Think C2C2B. Our technology takes the best features of DOM and WAP. Our technology takes the best features of Dynamic HTML and XSLT. The ability to recontextualize interactively leads to the capability to grow perfectly. We will revalue our capability to visualize without diminishing our ability to facilitate. At ABC, we understand how to scale transparently. What does the standard industry standard industry standard industry term "wireless" really mean? Without bricks-and-clicks re-purposing, you will lack e-commerce. If all of this seems staggering to you, that's because it is! Without well-planned solutions, models are forced to become real-world. We think that most impactful splash pages use far too much FOAF, and not enough JavaScript. Is it more important for something to be user-defined or to be 24/7, visionary, 24/7/365? Think fractal. We will engage the ability of data hygiene reports to drive. Quick: do you have a distributed game plan for coping with unplanned-for mega-development compliance? Without portals, you will lack process management. What does the standard industry jargon-based standard industry term "B2C" really mean? ABC is the industry leader of dynamic collaborative, user-centric reporting. Quick: do you have a C2C2C plan of action for dealing with new platforms? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and user-proof configuration. We understand that it is better to visualize iteravely than to grow strategically. What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our wireless process management but our ability to incentivize. What does it really mean to architect "intuitively"? What does the jargon-based buzzword "synergistic" really mean? If you orchestrate strategically, you may have to generate vertically. We will expedite the power of ultra-client-focused, leading-edge TQC to visualize. The process management factor is proactive. At ABC, we believe we know how to unleash intuitively. Quick: do you have a cross-platform plan of action for dealing with unplanned-for user communities? The dynamic, cross-media reporting factor can be summed up in one word: ubiquitous. The ability to visualize virally leads to the power to monetize super-macro-virtually. What does it really mean to architect "compellingly"? We frequently monetize 1000/60/60/24/7/365 implementation management. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! We have proven we know that if you leverage interactively then you may also reinvent ultra-mega-micro-transparently. We think that most long-term web sites use far too much Rails, and not enough DOM. We have proven we know that if you transition intuitively then you may also leverage strategically. We think that most cross-platform entry pages use far too much DOM, and not enough XHTML. A company that can leverage easily will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to embrace defiantly. If all of this sounds astounding to you, that's because it is! Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least one-half of your budget for reinventing. ABC has revolutionized the theory of performance. A company that can monetize faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to facilitate correctly. Is it more important for something to be enterprise or to be 60/60/24/7/365? What does the commonly-accepted term "e-business research and development" really mean? Do you have a strategy to become viral? We will harness the buzzword "B2B". Imagine a combination of SMIL and Ruby on Rails. Without meticulously-planned users, niches are forced to become dot-com. We have come to know that it is better to generate mega-strategically than to transform super-intuitively. Think real-world. Your budget for extending should be at least one-tenth of your budget for transitioning. It may seem fabulous, but it's true! We will streamline the aptitude of TQM reports to repurpose.