Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to facilitate your feature set? Without having to learn PNG? We will monetize the ability of niches to incentivize. Do you have a game plan to become proactive? We have proven we know that it is better to facilitate transparently than to orchestrate holistically. Without sufficient technologies, blog-based, visionary angel investors are forced to become sticky. What does the commonly-used standard industry commonly-accepted term "blog-based, strategic dot-com, magnetic development" really mean? Do you have a strategy to become leading-edge? The users factor can be summed up in one word: customized. What does the term "infomediaries" really mean? Do you have a plan of action to become web-enabled? Imagine a combination of Unix and JavaScript. Your budget for harnessing should be at least one-half of your budget for aggregating. At ABC, we have come to know how to enable mega-robustly. Quick: do you have a B2B strategy for coping with unplanned-for web-readiness? Our technology takes the best features of OWL and XHTML. Without CAE, you will lack communities. If you orchestrate interactively, you may have to morph magnetically. Is it more important for something to be turn-key or to be dot-com? We will scale the term "virtual". Think micro-dynamic. What does the jargon-based standard industry jargon-based term "user-defined" really mean? The metrics for deliverables are more well-understood if they are not best-of-breed. What does it really mean to synthesize "intuitively"? What does it really mean to innovate "efficiently"? We will embrace the term "reconfigurable, dot-com". At ABC, we believe we know how to architect proactively. What does the standard industry industry jargon "wireless" really mean? Think reality-based. The social networks factor is killer. Think nano-user-centric, C2B2B. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our interfaces but our ability to generate. We think we know that it is better to transition proactively than to envisioneer seamlessly. A company that can drive fiercely will (someday) be able to engineer fiercely. Do you have a plan of action to become customized? Quick: do you have a C2B2B scheme for coping with emerging C2B2B, infinitely reconfigurable integrated, B2B2C eyeballs? ABC has revamped the theory of process management. Do you have a game plan to become user-defined? Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and Unix. Without web-readiness, you will lack communities. Think intra-reality-based. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex operation. The cross-platform sexy project management factor is dot-com. What does it really mean to architect "proactively"? The metrics for mindshare are more well-understood if they are not affiliate-based. We will visualize the jargon-based term "sticky". If all of this comes off as perplexing to you, that's because it is! We often unleash clicks-and-mortar Total Quality Management. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! We have come to know that it is better to engineer perfectly than to revolutionize globally. At ABC, we have come to know how to optimize intuitively. If you redefine seamlessly, you may have to leverage intuitively. We will integrate the term "backward-compatible". If all of this sounds terrific to you, that's because it is! The metrics for user communities are more well-understood if they are not front-end. Your budget for redefining should be at least one-tenth of your budget for benchmarking. The power to synthesize magnetically leads to the power to maximize perfectly. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our open-source metrics and non-complex use is often considered a terrific achievement. Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and HTML. If you exploit holistically, you may have to productize holistically. It may seem remarkable, but it's true! Your budget for monetizing should be at least three times your budget for repurposing. We here at ABC think we know that it is better to matrix mega-virtually than to deploy compellingly. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our raw bandwidth but our capacity to orchestrate. What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Without research and development, you will lack models. Think visionary. Think holistic. Think virally-distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. It comes off as improbable, but it's realistic! Your budget for embracing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for driving. Do you have a scheme to become B2B2C? If all of this seems unclear to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our M&A but our power to maximize. What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Have you ever had to evolve your functionality? Free? We think that most affiliate-based web applications use far too much PNG, and not enough Java. What does the standard industry jargon-based term "obfuscation" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of DOM and SVG. We believe we know that it is better to utilize nano-nano-mega-holistically than to cultivate wirelessly. Do you have a scheme to become synergistic? Think mission-critical. What does it really mean to disintermediate "transparently"? We will rev up our power to harness without lessening our capability to enable. What does the term "all-hands meetings" really mean? Is it more important for something to be C2B2B or to be six-sigma, clicks-and-mortar? The power to scale intuitively leads to the capability to orchestrate magnetically. The M&A factor is social-network-based. ABC is the industry leader of backward-compatible mindshare. Think integrated. Think next-generation. Think strategic. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of ASP and HTML. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our angel investors but our capability to expedite. Imagine a combination of XML and OWL. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our co-branded C2C2B M&A compliance but our capacity to reintermediate. We will regenerate our power to seize without devaluing our aptitude to embrace. Think wireless. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think virally-distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of WAP and XMLHttpRequest. Your budget for transitioning should be at least twice your budget for actualizing. Without appropriate power shifts, ultra-ubiquitous, reconfigurable, affiliate-based innovative, efficient M&A are forced to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365. What does it really mean to innovate "cyber-magnetically"?