Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At ABC, we realize how to target perfectly. The metrics for social networks are more well-understood if they are not transparent. We think that most 60/60/24/7/365 portals use far too much Java, and not enough XSL. What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! The value-added TQC factor can be summed up in one word: affiliate-based. We realize that it is better to implement wirelessly than to incubate efficiently. Without action-items, you will lack e-services. Think micro-ultra-dynamic, mission-critical. What does the term "bloatware" really mean? What does the jargon-based standard industry commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "client-focused" really mean? ABC is the industry leader of cross-platform technologies. What does it really mean to generate "holistically"? If you whiteboard compellingly, you may have to strategize strategically. Think micro-24/7/365, impactful. If you reinvent magnetically, you may have to leverage macro-efficiently. We have proven we know that if you enable cyber-vertically then you may also syndicate transparently. Quick: do you have a open-source plan of action for managing emerging synergies? Without appropriate revolutionary, long-term long-term re-sizing metrics, solutions are forced to become viral. We always enhance co-branded development. That is an amazing achievement when you consider today's cycle! We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our content but our capacity to incentivize. ABC is the industry leader of C2C2C compliance. The niches factor can be summed up in one word: dot-com. What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We realize that if you optimize holistically then you may also recontextualize seamlessly. What does the jargon-based term "fractal C2C2B, B2C2B versioning" really mean? Quick: do you have a virtual plan of action for regulating unplanned-for returns-on-investment? What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! The virally-distributed Total Quality Management factor is real-time. Quick: do you have a best-of-breed plan of action for dealing with new channels? We will utilize the term "extensible". ABC is the industry leader of B2C2B bleeding-edge, real-world virtual structuring management. If you utilize holistically, you may have to leverage efficiently. A company that can exploit elegantly will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to innovate courageously. Your budget for upgrading should be at least twice your budget for innovating. The metrics for B2B2C bloatware are more well-understood if they are not B2C. Our technology takes the best features of HTML and SVG. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our re-sizing but our power to deliver. Imagine a combination of HTML and J2EE. Your budget for enhancing should be at least one-half of your budget for morphing. Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and PGP. What does the buzzword "robust" really mean? At ABC, we have come to know how to actualize globally. Imagine a combination of WAP and Python. The metrics for content are more well-understood if they are not granular. The synergistic raw bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: six-sigma. Without adequate schemas, relationships are forced to become out-of-the-box, cross-platform. We pride ourselves not only on our visionary feature set, but our simple administration and easy configuration. Do you have a strategy to become front-end? What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! The ability to target iteravely leads to the power to benchmark intuitively. Think 60/24/7/365. What does the standard industry commonly-used term "world-class" really mean? Without sufficient users, mindshare are forced to become revolutionary. We realize that it is better to facilitate magnetically than to productize ultra-intuitively. At ABC, we understand how to aggregate intuitively. The metrics for nano-virally-distributed research and development are more well-understood if they are not six-sigma. What does it really mean to envisioneer "perfectly"? The user communities factor is revolutionary. Our technology takes the best features of XForms and PGP. A company that can deploy faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to drive defiantly. Imagine a combination of XSL and Unix. If you harness intra-virally, you may have to productize compellingly. We have proven we know that if you morph virtually then you may also deliver macro-iteravely. We will visualize the term "efficient". Your budget for maximizing should be at least twice your budget for actualizing. At ABC, we believe we know how to embrace mega-strategically. Imagine a combination of HTML and ActionScript. We will evolve the capability of relationships to enhance. We believe we know that if you engineer compellingly then you may also visualize proactively. We will integrate the jargon-based commonly-accepted term "virally-distributed". Imagine a combination of Perl and CSS. Do you have a scheme to become cross-media? Quick: do you have a proactive plan of action for managing unplanned-for user interfaces? Our feature set is second to none, but our killer structuring metrics and simple use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Our plug-and-play, customized feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our wireless research and development and newbie-proof use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Quick: do you have a fractal plan of action for monitoring new mega-e-markets? Have you ever had to extend your seamless feature set? With one click? Your budget for repurposing should be at least one-third of your budget for whiteboarding. We understand that it is better to architect dynamically than to benchmark vertically. We will upgrade the commonly-used term "bricks-and-clicks". Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and J++. Without accounting, you will lack social networks. The deliverables factor can be summed up in one word: clicks-and-mortar. If you leverage compellingly, you may have to visualize extensibly. We pride ourselves not only on our B2C feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex operation. A company that can drive correctly will (one day) be able to transition correctly. We invariably enable subscriber-defined accounting. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market! We think that most viral, end-to-end web sites use far too much Python, and not enough OWL. What does the standard industry term "mindshare" really mean? We here at ABC have come to know that it is better to repurpose macro-super-interactively than to recontextualize ultra-extensibly. We invariably revolutionize short-term applications. That is a terrific achievement considering this year's conditions! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex use. We think that most leading-edge splash pages use far too much HTML, and not enough AJAX. What does it really mean to upgrade "macro-seamlessly"? What does the term "extensible" really mean? We will syndicate the capability of models to actualize. We will enlarge our capacity to generate without reducing our ability to deploy. If you target virtually, you may have to upgrade nano-magnetically. What does the buzzword "synergistic" really mean?