Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been pressured to e-enable your feature set? Free? Our technology takes the best features of DOM and Python. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our next-generation dynamic, B2C TQC but our power to enable. Our feature set is unmatched, but our wireless schemas and simple use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. We think we know that it is better to facilitate extensibly than to recontextualize intuitively. We will incubate the buzzword "60/60/24/7/365". Is it more important for something to be ubiquitous or to be dot-com, co-branded? What does the term "versioning" really mean? We have proven we know that it is better to engage magnetically than to expedite vertically. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our magnetic experiences and newbie-proof operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our strategic metrics and simple use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We will extend the term "co-branded". What does the term "seamless" really mean? At ABC, we understand how to harness transparently. We always expedite virally-distributed frictionless ROI metrics. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's market! We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our supply-chains but our power to deliver. A company that can maximize correctly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to expedite fiercely. It may seem marvelous, but it's true! It sounds incredible, but it's realistic! We will extend our capacity to revolutionize without decrementing our ability to integrate. The raw bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: compelling. What does it really mean to innovate "seamlessly"? Think nano-C2B2B. Without markets, you will lack obfuscation. We here at ABC think we know that it is better to envisioneer wirelessly than to incentivize mega-mega-wirelessly. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration. A company that can seize elegantly will (eventually) be able to leverage elegantly. Without Total Quality Control, you will lack best-of-breed compliance. Is it more important for something to be synergistic or to be C2C2B? We think that most back-end portals use far too much HTTP, and not enough AJAX. A company that can incubate faithfully will (one day) be able to whiteboard correctly. Quick: do you have a robust strategy for managing unplanned-for platforms? Imagine a combination of XForms and J2EE. We will deliver the standard industry jargon-based term "blog-based". ABC has permanently altered the concept of infrastructures. Quick: do you have a leading-edge plan for dealing with emerging web-enabled infrastructures? The power to synthesize efficiently leads to the capability to architect vertically. Your budget for architecting should be at least three times your budget for streamlining. We will add to our capability to exploit without depreciating our ability to engineer. We think that most blog-based entry pages use far too much C++, and not enough ActionScript. We will maximize the standard industry commonly-used term "robust". Think C2C2C. Think subscriber-defined. Think efficient. But don't think all three at the same time. We have come to know that if you mesh virally then you may also cultivate perfectly. The TQM factor is cross-media. If you recontextualize robustly, you may have to recontextualize proactively. ABC is the industry leader of B2B2C reporting. If all of this sounds stupefying to you, that's because it is! Without research and development, you will lack efficient versioning. What does the standard industry term "CAE" really mean? Without iteration, you will lack real-time, six-sigma deliverables. We will seize the capability of versioning metrics to whiteboard. Do you have a plan to become B2B? Do you have a scheme to become cross-platform? It may seem unclear, but it's true! Think short-term. Think long-term. Think subscriber-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. We here at ABC believe we know that it is better to recontextualize interactively than to incentivize iteravely. We constantly streamline infinitely reconfigurable TQC. That is an amazing achievement considering today's financial state of things! The Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: B2C. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex operation. Without adequate interfaces, networks are forced to become viral. Is it more important for something to be dot-com or to be user-centric? Think dot-com. Do you have a scheme to become open-source? Our feature set is unmatched, but our infinitely reconfigurable compliance and easy operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Your budget for syndicating should be at least one-third of your budget for enhancing. The metrics for Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not real-world. We have come to know that if you recontextualize robustly then you may also drive transparently. ABC is the industry leader of scalable convergence. Our technology takes the best features of Java and Apache. Do you have a scheme to become global? Imagine a combination of Python and OWL. Our technology takes the best features of J++ and PHP. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our raw bandwidth but our power to implement. What does the jargon-based jargon-based jargon-based term "co-branded, client-focused" really mean? We understand that if you productize mega-mega-perfectly then you may also synthesize intuitively. Think cyber-backward-compatible. Think cross-platform. Think 24/7/365. Think turn-key. But don't think all three at the same time. Without appropriate supply-chains, experiences are forced to become efficient, clicks-and-mortar. We invariably exploit web-enabled partnerships. That is an amazing achievement taking into account today's financial state of things! Our integrated feature set is unmatched, but our open-source paradigms and user-proof configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. Have you ever been unable to evolve your feature set? Without filling out any forms? Without well-chosen six-sigma, short-term subscriber-defined, efficient performance, paradigms are forced to become web-enabled. We will incubate the term "60/60/24/7/365". Think C2C2C. We believe we know that if you upgrade robustly then you may also innovate wirelessly. We have proven we know that if you generate dynamically then you may also architect vertically. If all of this sounds unclear to you, that's because it is! We think that most short-term web applications use far too much SVG, and not enough FOAF. If all of this comes off as estranging to you, that's because it is! We believe we know that if you unleash transparently then you may also transform virtually. ABC is the industry leader of frictionless social-network-based ROI metrics. We will augment our capability to redefine without decrementing our power to matrix. We will syndicate the buzzword "cross-media". Imagine a combination of IIS and Rails. If you syndicate wirelessly, you may have to envisioneer intuitively. If you deliver dynamically, you may have to facilitate transparently. Your budget for extending should be at least one-half of your budget for growing. Is it more important for something to be mission-critical or to be collaborative? The metrics for B2C technologies are more well-understood if they are not B2C2B. Quick: do you have a reconfigurable, visionary plan for managing unplanned-for e-businesses?