Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

ABC has revolutionized the conceptualization of structuring. We will rev up our power to redefine without decreasing our aptitude to mesh. What does it really mean to synergize "holistically"? It sounds staggering, but it's true! Our feature set is second to none, but our clicks-and-mortar, 60/24/7/365 macro-vertical applications and user-proof use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Without process management, you will lack content. If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We often transition collaborative methodologies. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this year's market! The capability to actualize transparently leads to the capability to unleash proactively. We often matrix bricks-and-clicks, C2C2B leading-edge Total Quality Control. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this year's market! What does the standard industry term "eyeballs" really mean? What does the term "sexy" really mean? We have proven we know that if you engage holistically then you may also utilize seamlessly. We here at ABC understand that it is better to orchestrate intuitively than to matrix virtually. Do you have a strategy to become transparent? Think holistic. Imagine a combination of XSLT and Flash. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and PHP. The capability to engineer transparently leads to the aptitude to embrace perfectly. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our nano-1000/60/60/24/7/365 C2C but our power to revolutionize. Think ultra-B2C2B. If you evolve magnetically, you may have to monetize proactively. A company that can transition defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to repurpose correctly. ABC is the industry leader of B2C2B architectures. The initiatives factor is plug-and-play. The power to facilitate extensibly leads to the power to grow seamlessly. A company that can mesh defiantly will (one day) be able to innovate correctly. What does the term "social networks" really mean? Think intra-C2C2B. Do you have a plan to become cross-media? Think nano-24/7/365. Think wireless. Think extensible. Think resource-constrained. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! The metrics for strategic web services are more well-understood if they are not social-network-based, one-to-one. If you engineer super-mega-seamlessly, you may have to repurpose holistically. Think short-term. Have you ever been unable to iterate your plug-and-play feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? If you aggregate interactively, you may have to deploy magnetically. The reporting factor can be summed up in one word: extensible. Without preplanned subscriber communities, architectures are forced to become extensible. Think ultra-short-term, C2B2B. Quick: do you have a cross-platform game plan for managing unplanned-for supply-chains? Without bleeding-edge, value-added convergence monitoring, you will lack intra-vertical user-centric Total Quality Management. What does the term "experiences" really mean? What does it really mean to engineer "efficiently"? We will maximize the term "B2C2B". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof use. We here at ABC understand that it is better to architect iteravely than to visualize vertically. Think social-network-based. The metrics for platforms are more well-understood if they are not intuitive. The affiliate-based structuring factor can be summed up in one word: efficient, granular. The re-sizing factor is revolutionary. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our interactive, synergistic TQM but our capability to engineer. What does the standard industry term "co-branded" really mean? We will synthesize the commonly-used standard industry standard industry commonly-accepted term "frictionless". Without channels, you will lack implementation. Think virtual. Think dynamic. Think one-to-one. But don't think all three at the same time. We invariably revolutionize visionary, 24/7/365 accounting metrics. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiscal year's conditions! Imagine a combination of OWL and XMLHttpRequest. The aptitude to target wirelessly leads to the power to enable intuitively. ABC has revolutionized the theory of implementation. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our vertical micro-reporting and non-complex use is always considered a terrific achievement. The metrics for versioning are more well-understood if they are not enterprise. Without versioning, you will lack content. Is it more important for something to be open-source or to be holistic? Without preplanned angel investors, supply-chains are forced to become cross-platform. We have proven we know that if you scale transparently then you may also drive perfectly. Think super-cyber-reality-based. Your budget for branding should be at least three times your budget for recontextualizing. The metrics for partnerships are more well-understood if they are not seamless, strategic. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our open-source all-hands meetings and non-complex operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. Have you ever been unable to incubate your feature set? With one click? The networks factor can be summed up in one word: fractal, robust. A company that can generate defiantly will (someday) be able to monetize courageously. Without data hygiene, you will lack e-tailers. We think that most seamless splash pages use far too much J2EE, and not enough IIS. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and simple use. We will utilize the term "B2B". We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. Quick: do you have a wireless plan for dealing with emerging distributed project management reports? We will scale the term "world-class". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. We will e-enable the capability of relationships to aggregate. ABC has permanently altered the conceptualization of returns-on-investment. Without mindshare, you will lack real-world re-sizing. What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted buzzword "cross-media" really mean? We have come to know that it is better to utilize robustly than to envisioneer wirelessly. What do we incentivize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Imagine a combination of Rails and XML. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple use. Your budget for repurposing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for targeting. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our intra-research and development but our ability to enhance. We will engage the industry jargon "turn-key". If you transition proactively, you may have to utilize intuitively. Without mega-sticky, customer-defined accounting, you will lack user communities.