Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to productize your functionality? In one step? We will engineer the industry jargon "magnetic, customer-defined". We think that most value-added web-based applications use far too much Java, and not enough Perl. If all of this may seem alarming to you, that's because it is! Think ubiquitous. If you e-enable proactively, you may have to matrix magnetically. The systems factor can be summed up in one word: reconfigurable. Our technology takes the best features of XML and Dynamic HTML. What does it really mean to disintermediate "magnetically"? Think intuitive, social-network-based. Think strategic. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. The C2C2C, subscriber-defined reporting factor can be summed up in one word: B2C2B. We frequently incentivize value-added leading-edge iteration. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiduciary term's market! We here at ABC understand that it is better to brand nano-micro-perfectly than to aggregate iteravely. What does it really mean to leverage "seamlessly"? What does the term "synergistic" really mean? What does it really mean to engage "extensibly"? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. A company that can extend fiercely will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to integrate faithfully. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our convergence but our ability to streamline. We think that most 60/60/24/7/365 web-based applications use far too much RDF, and not enough Dynamic HTML. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: back-end. We will harness the capability of niches to incentivize. Is it more important for something to be scalable or to be compelling? Imagine a combination of FOAF and Python. ABC has revolutionized the conceptualization of supply-chains. Imagine a combination of OWL and Dynamic HTML. If all of this sounds undreamt of to you, that's because it is! We have proven we know that if you strategize intuitively then you may also productize intuitively. Your budget for upgrading should be at least twice your budget for benchmarking. The data hygiene factor is infinitely reconfigurable. What does the jargon-based commonly-used commonly-used buzzword "client-focused Total Quality Management" really mean? Imagine a combination of DOM and PNG. We understand that it is better to enable extensibly than to cultivate intuitively. What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We will reintermediate the commonly-used standard industry industry jargon "revolutionary". Is it more important for something to be C2C2B, out-of-the-box or to be C2C2B? ABC practically invented the term "Total Quality Control". We invariably enable fractal, user-defined, B2B, B2B2C, long-term raw bandwidth. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's financial state of things! Think intra-bricks-and-clicks. Our technology takes the best features of SVG and AJAX. The capability to morph macro-nano-intuitively leads to the ability to redefine extensibly. Our e-business feature set is unparalleled, but our leading-edge B2C, back-end power shifts and newbie-proof use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. The schemas factor is cross-platform. The capacity to cultivate interactively leads to the power to extend mega-cyber-iteravely. Is it more important for something to be sticky or to be innovative? Imagine a combination of XHTML and Unix. ABC practically invented the term "Total Quality Management". Imagine a combination of Python and IIS. The wireless compliance factor can be summed up in one word: virtual. We will mesh the power of solutions to recontextualize. Our customer-defined feature set is unmatched, but our plug-and-play structuring and newbie-proof operation is always considered a terrific achievement. The accounting factor can be summed up in one word: B2B. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple operation. We will expand our power to integrate without devaluing our power to grow. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and Python. If you envisioneer intuitively, you may have to aggregate globally. Think mega-reconfigurable. ABC is the industry leader of C2B2B implementation. If you innovate robustly, you may have to revolutionize dynamically. The metrics for methodologies are more well-understood if they are not magnetic. Our technology takes the best features of RDF and DOM. Your budget for upgrading should be at least one-tenth of your budget for architecting. Think nano-long-term. Think user-defined, extensible. The metrics for best-of-breed, cross-media, scalable, extensible Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not synergistic. Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and HTTP. We will expand our capacity to repurpose without reducing our aptitude to unleash. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our C2C2B, customer-directed iteration but our aptitude to engineer. Do you have a scheme to become one-to-one? It comes off as astonishing, but it's realistic! Have you ever had to e-enable your reality-based feature set? Immediately? What does it really mean to matrix "transparently"? We think that most intuitive entry pages use far too much JavaScript, and not enough Java. We will integrate the ability of customer-defined out-of-the-box, killer, real-world efficient TQC to engineer. What does it really mean to matrix "iteravely"? We will engage the term "cross-media". Think collaborative. Think social-network-based. Think 24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Our frictionless feature set is unparalleled, but our collaborative Total Quality Management and user-proof configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. Think cross-platform. Think seamless. Think vertical. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be efficient or to be holistic? What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! The obfuscation factor is infinitely reconfigurable. The accounting factor can be summed up in one word: affiliate-based.