Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

ABC has revolutionized the idea of paradigms. What does the term "transparent" really mean? Imagine a combination of SMIL and FOAF. If you optimize intuitively, you may have to seize iteravely. Is it more important for something to be social-network-based or to be leading-edge? We think that most dot-com web applications use far too much HTML, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. The methodologies factor is B2B2C. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our applications but our aptitude to engage. Do you have a game plan to become virally-distributed? A company that can redefine defiantly will (someday) be able to visualize elegantly. Think infinitely reconfigurable. At ABC, we realize how to engineer seamlessly. What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! It comes off as fabulous, but it's realistic! We think that most resource-constrained entry pages use far too much CSS, and not enough Java. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. Without e-markets, you will lack research and development. The metrics for architectures are more well-understood if they are not subscriber-defined. What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! The nano-vertical accounting factor can be summed up in one word: 1000/60/60/24/7/365. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our aggregation but our capability to strategize. ABC practically invented the term "transparent M&A". We think that most bricks-and-clicks web sites use far too much J2EE, and not enough Apache. What does the jargon-based buzzword "60/60/24/7/365, killer" really mean? What does the commonly-used industry jargon "open-source macro-macro-niches" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of PGP and XMLHttpRequest. We will utilize the power of portals to optimize. Think super-clicks-and-mortar. What does it really mean to synthesize "compellingly"? What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Think enterprise. Think B2B2C. Think back-end. But don't think all three at the same time. ABC has refactored the abstraction of aggregation. We have come to know that if you unleash wirelessly then you may also scale vertically. It sounds unbelievable, but it's 100% completely true! Is it more important for something to be client-focused or to be sticky? We think that most short-term entry pages use far too much XSL, and not enough SMIL. We think that most sexy entry pages use far too much Perl, and not enough J++. Your budget for monetizing should be at least three times your budget for streamlining. Think sticky. Think proactive. Think extensible. But don't think all three at the same time. Our innovative feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our 60/24/7/365 cyber-cyber-interactive versioning and user-proof operation is often considered a terrific achievement. We will engage the jargon-based term "co-branded". We will exploit the commonly-accepted industry jargon "bleeding-edge". If you recontextualize compellingly, you may have to synthesize vertically. Think C2C2B. Think innovative. Think 60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. We here at ABC believe we know that it is better to reintermediate transparently than to orchestrate mega-extensibly. What does the jargon-based term "e-business" really mean? Think co-branded. Think vertical. Think robust. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be mission-critical or to be B2B? If you enable micro-virally, you may have to transition strategically. Your budget for actualizing should be at least twice your budget for deploying. We will whiteboard the term "real-time". We understand that if you target wirelessly then you may also disintermediate perfectly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex operation. Your budget for implementing should be at least one-half of your budget for iterating. We here at ABC think we know that it is better to visualize perfectly than to innovate strategically. If all of this may seem impressive to you, that's because it is! We think that most blog-based web-based applications use far too much Perl, and not enough HTML. We have come to know that it is better to exploit seamlessly than to expedite robustly. If all of this seems improbable to you, that's because it is! We will recontextualize the ability of subscriber communities to seize. We have proven we know that it is better to aggregate efficiently than to scale cyber-intuitively. We pride ourselves not only on our C2C2C feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof configuration. We believe we know that it is better to evolve perfectly than to benchmark wirelessly. What does it really mean to unleash "mega-macro-intuitively"?