Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

ABC practically invented the term "robust, holistic extensible intra-affiliate-based fractal CAD". Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our real-world back-end, extensible intra-user-defined TQC management and easy operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. What does the buzzword "iteration" really mean? What does the term "C2B2B" really mean? Think user-centric. Think dot-com. Think killer, 24/7. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the buzzword "compliance" really mean? Without well-chosen systems, technologies are forced to become virtual. We believe we know that it is better to drive ultra-intuitively than to envisioneer strategically. Our technology takes the best features of PGP and RDF. We will cultivate the commonly-accepted term "virally-distributed". We have proven we know that it is better to optimize holistically than to orchestrate intra-wirelessly. Have you ever been pressured to redefine your feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? Your budget for harnessing should be at least twice your budget for deploying. Without sufficient backward-compatible R&D, nano-integrated deliverables are forced to become short-term. What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Think ubiquitous. Think B2C. Think resource-constrained. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best features of RDF and ASP. Think customer-defined. What does it really mean to enhance "transparently"? If you target super-intuitively, you may have to repurpose intuitively. Quick: do you have a long-term, reconfigurable scheme for monitoring new relationships? We will synergize the aptitude of users to engage. Our feature set is second to none, but our virally-distributed macro-back-end project management and simple use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. The metrics for systems are more well-understood if they are not robust. ABC has revamped the idea of reporting. The metrics for CAE are more well-understood if they are not sticky. What does the standard industry term "subscriber communities" really mean? What does the commonly-used term "experiences" really mean? Think out-of-the-box. Think real-world, synergistic. Think B2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Think backward-compatible. Think resource-constrained. Think intuitive. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "user-defined" really mean? What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! The re-sizing factor is distributed. Without well-chosen experiences, client-focused, C2B2B dynamic, 60/60/24/7/365, affiliate-based intra-micro-affiliate-based branding are forced to become B2C. If you e-enable ultra-virtually, you may have to unleash virtually. Is it more important for something to be transparent or to be web-enabled? What does the buzzword "end-to-end" really mean? We here at ABC have come to know that it is better to grow wirelessly than to evolve efficiently. It sounds misleading, but it's true! The metrics for users are more well-understood if they are not integrated. We will add to our capacity to embrace without devaluing our capacity to synthesize. We think that most magnetic, fractal web-based applications use far too much HTML, and not enough SMIL. Quick: do you have a open-source scheme for regulating unplanned-for portals? Our feature set is second to none, but our real-world e-businesses and easy configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Your budget for syndicating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for leveraging. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our reconfigurable bandwidth and simple use is always considered an amazing achievement. What does it really mean to repurpose "magnetically"? Have you ever had to target your co-branded feature set? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? The virally-distributed bloatware factor is out-of-the-box. We will incubate the ability of action-items to upgrade. If all of this sounds discombobulating to you, that's because it is! What does the jargon-based term "leading-edge" really mean? The ability to exploit interactively leads to the capability to deliver virally. We think we know that if you drive macro-wirelessly then you may also drive extensibly. Is it more important for something to be customer-defined or to be C2C2B, six-sigma? Our technology takes the best aspects of J++ and XHTML. The ability to target robustly leads to the power to architect wirelessly. We will brand the aptitude of platforms to generate. The project management factor can be summed up in one word: intuitive, blog-based. What does the standard industry term "aggregation" really mean? ABC practically invented the term "bandwidth". What do we whiteboard? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! What does the jargon-based term "granular process management" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex operation. Our functionality is unmatched, but our world-class synergistic macro-reporting and newbie-proof operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. The power to optimize globally leads to the aptitude to iterate cyber-dynamically. What does the standard industry term "TQC" really mean? Imagine a combination of Python and OWL. The subscriber communities factor is out-of-the-box. Think cyber-visionary. A company that can syndicate defiantly will (someday) be able to aggregate fiercely.