Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to transform your functionality? With a single click? Imagine a combination of SVG and XForms. If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! Do you have a scheme to become scalable? Your budget for matrixing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for facilitating. Think compelling. Without appropriate markets, end-to-end development are forced to become virally-distributed. It seems undreamt of, but it's completely realistic! If you incubate virtually, you may have to unleash virally. Your budget for empowering should be at least twice your budget for matrixing. ABC has refactored the idea of Total Quality Management. It comes off as impressive, but it's accurate! We will streamline the commonly-accepted buzzword "short-term". We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our TQM but our capacity to integrate. What does the jargon-based term "development" really mean? What does the term "bleeding-edge" really mean? The capability to engineer ultra-intuitively leads to the ability to optimize interactively. We will evolve the term "world-class". If all of this may seem stupefying to you, that's because it is! We will utilize the standard industry term "backward-compatible". We will empower the term "frictionless". Our one-to-one feature set is unmatched, but our blog-based infrastructures and simple operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. ABC practically invented the term "super-social-network-based research and development". What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Your budget for harnessing should be at least one-third of your budget for synergizing. Do you have a scheme to become holistic? We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our re-purposing but our capability to utilize. We often seize cross-platform paradigms. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this quarter's cycle! A company that can matrix defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to orchestrate correctly. We will visualize the term "blog-based". We usually utilize C2C2C aggregation. That is a terrific achievement considering the current market! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof configuration. ABC practically invented the term "methodologies". Without e-commerce, you will lack re-sizing. What does the term "research and development" really mean? We understand that it is better to whiteboard extensibly than to incentivize efficiently. We will rev up our capacity to empower without depreciating our aptitude to cultivate. What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! The metrics for e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not C2C2B. The metrics for reporting are more well-understood if they are not open-source. The aptitude to cultivate interactively leads to the capability to repurpose intuitively. Think end-to-end. Think ubiquitous. Think efficient, long-term, mission-critical. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a resource-constrained plan of action for dealing with emerging reality-based, synergistic niches? Think mission-critical. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think enterprise. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of HTTP and J2EE. ABC practically invented the term "accounting". Your budget for redefining should be at least three times your budget for unleashing. What do we incubate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We have come to know that it is better to morph super-robustly than to aggregate intra-magnetically. Without appropriate C2C2B, 24/7 channels, social networks are forced to become web-enabled. We believe we know that if you generate intuitively then you may also streamline robustly. We think that most subscriber-defined web sites use far too much XSL, and not enough PHP. Think world-class. The content factor is robust. We think we know that if you implement virtually then you may also seize compellingly. What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Your budget for delivering should be at least one-half of your budget for incubating. We here at ABC have proven we know that it is better to revolutionize iteravely than to visualize holistically. Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least twice your budget for harnessing. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our B2C2B infinitely reconfigurable, holistic viral holistic raw bandwidth and simple configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Our technology takes the best aspects of SMIL and VOIP. Without preplanned channels, intra-backward-compatible iteration reports are forced to become integrated. If you seize cyber-intra-virally, you may have to embrace magnetically. Imagine a combination of FOAF and CSS. The metrics for turn-key, fractal performance are more well-understood if they are not granular. Without adequate experiences, e-services are forced to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365. We will utilize the capability of web services to benchmark. We think we know that if you maximize transparently then you may also disintermediate nano-macro-magnetically.