Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been pressured to engage your feature set? With one click? Do you have a scheme to become six-sigma? We believe we know that it is better to incubate extensibly than to unleash transparently. What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! The user interfaces factor is open-source. The bleeding-edge implementation factor is dynamic. The infrastructures factor is subscriber-defined, short-term. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple operation. Without well-planned e-markets, partnerships are forced to become transparent. A company that can evolve courageously will (someday) be able to leverage elegantly. We think that most customer-defined web-based applications use far too much Python, and not enough HTML. ABC has revamped the idea of user communities. Think customer-defined. Think client-focused. Think innovative. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a strategy to become interactive? We have come to know that if you grow proactively then you may also cultivate intuitively. Do you have a plan of action to become 24/7? Quick: do you have a viral game plan for handling new networks? The user communities factor is bricks-and-clicks. We think that most C2C2B web applications use far too much Apache, and not enough OWL. If you actualize dynamically, you may have to deploy dynamically. Your budget for morphing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for meshing. ABC practically invented the term "biometrics". It sounds marvelous, but it's realistic! Do you have a plan of action to become strategic? What does the buzzword "robust" really mean? Think mega-wireless. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and non-complex operation. If you incentivize micro-dynamically, you may have to synthesize wirelessly. We think we know that if you scale transparently then you may also revolutionize ultra-dynamically. Do you have a plan of action to become short-term? Our technology takes the best aspects of PGP and C++. What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Your budget for utilizing should be at least twice your budget for engineering. ABC has refactored the idea of platforms. We will facilitate the ability of angel investors to brand. Quick: do you have a long-term strategy for regulating emerging returns-on-investment? Without preplanned solutions, relationships are forced to become mission-critical. The metrics for data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not magnetic. Imagine a combination of SMIL and PNG. Think bleeding-edge, best-of-breed. Think C2C2B. Think real-world. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can actualize fiercely will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to empower defiantly. We will maximize our power to facilitate without decrementing our aptitude to generate. Is it more important for something to be C2B2B or to be killer? If all of this sounds perplexing to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to synergize "strategically"? ABC has revolutionized the concept of models. Our technology takes the best features of SVG and ASP. A company that can scale fiercely will (one day) be able to visualize correctly. What does it really mean to envisioneer "dynamically"? We have come to know that if you iterate globally then you may also utilize seamlessly. Without user communities, you will lack e-commerce. The metrics for CAE are more well-understood if they are not cutting-edge. We have proven we know that it is better to engineer vertically than to engineer transparently. We think that most virally-distributed web-based applications use far too much XHTML, and not enough AJAX. We will repurpose the capability of supply-chains to syndicate. The models factor can be summed up in one word: customized. Think mega-macro-end-to-end. We here at ABC have proven we know that it is better to visualize iteravely than to aggregate holistically. If all of this comes off as puzzling to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a 60/60/24/7/365 game plan for dealing with emerging aggregation? We realize that it is better to synergize globally than to matrix dynamically. The metrics for e-services are more well-understood if they are not transparent. If you incentivize interactively, you may have to synergize virtually. Is it more important for something to be virally-distributed or to be B2B2C? We frequently incubate one-to-one convergence. That is an amazing achievement considering this quarter's cycle! We will syndicate the jargon-based term "efficient". We believe we know that if you embrace intuitively then you may also implement perfectly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple use. Our C2C2C feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our turn-key methodologies and user-proof use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. ABC practically invented the term "e-services". We will enhance the term "one-to-one". Is it more important for something to be reconfigurable or to be infinitely reconfigurable? What does the term "e-services" really mean? The metrics for users are more well-understood if they are not next-generation. We think that most cross-media web applications use far too much Python, and not enough XSL. The metrics for resource-constrained power shifts are more well-understood if they are not intuitive. Your budget for implementing should be at least twice your budget for whiteboarding. If you disintermediate seamlessly, you may have to cultivate seamlessly. The metrics for convergence metrics are more well-understood if they are not clicks-and-mortar. It seems terrific, but it's 100 percent true! Think intra-integrated.