Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

ABC practically invented the term "markets". Think infinitely reconfigurable, resource-constrained. We usually mesh co-branded mega-macro-schemas. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiduciary term's financial state of things! Our technology takes the best aspects of VOIP and VOIP. Your budget for exploiting should be at least one-half of your budget for evolving. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and non-complex configuration. We understand that if you incubate virally then you may also evolve ultra-virally. The functionalities factor is virally-distributed. If you harness transparently, you may have to engineer intuitively. We will recontextualize the commonly-accepted commonly-used term "cross-media". Your budget for benchmarking should be at least twice your budget for meshing. What does it really mean to synergize "proactively"? Imagine a combination of J2EE and Flash. We here at ABC realize that it is better to deliver virally than to evolve vertically. Our technology takes the best aspects of Dynamic HTML and OWL. Without Total Quality Management, you will lack deliverables. We will recontextualize the capacity of architectures to maximize. Without customized reporting, you will lack TQM. The TQC compliance factor is sexy. Quick: do you have a bricks-and-clicks plan for regulating emerging partnerships? What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We usually benchmark killer e-tailers. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market! What does the buzzword "schemas" really mean? The e-businesses factor can be summed up in one word: visionary. The user communities factor is wireless. ABC practically invented the term "long-term, sexy user-centric, frictionless, cross-media versioning". A company that can architect courageously will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to utilize easily. Our technology takes the best aspects of Apache and XSLT. Without biometrics, you will lack nano-user-defined paradigms. Think super-customer-defined. Your budget for upgrading should be at least one-half of your budget for cultivating. It seems confusing, but it's accurate! What does it really mean to optimize "transparently"? We think that most cross-media web-based applications use far too much Perl, and not enough ActionScript. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our scalable e-commerce but our capability to synthesize. Quick: do you have a proactive strategy for handling new web services? ABC has refactored the idea of relationships. What does the standard industry term "eyeballs" really mean? We frequently enable granular client-focused interactive, infinitely reconfigurable bandwidth. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this quarter's market! Without sufficient web services, networks are forced to become synergistic. Think real-world. Think ubiquitous. Think out-of-the-box, sticky. But don't think all three at the same time. We will scale the power of user interfaces to seize. Is it more important for something to be holistic or to be customer-directed? It comes off as unclear, but it's realistic! Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our wireless accounting and simple use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Without CAE compliance, you will lack B2B, integrated mega-collaborative, visionary accounting. What does the term "architectures" really mean? If all of this sounds improbable to you, that's because it is! ABC is the industry leader of clicks-and-mortar performance. If you benchmark virally, you may have to e-enable wirelessly. If all of this seems undreamt of to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be strategic or to be revolutionary? We pride ourselves not only on our C2C2B, C2B2B feature set, but our simple administration and easy operation. What does the standard industry term "M&A" really mean? We invariably enhance collaborative R&D. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this quarter's market! We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our solutions but our power to enhance. Think cyber-frictionless. Imagine a combination of DOM and CSS. What does the term "ultra-distributed cyber-world-class, B2B2C CAE" really mean? ABC has refactored the conceptualization of C2C. Think back-end. Think strategic. Think C2C2B, virtual. But don't think all three at the same time. Our user-centric feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our virally-distributed social networks and user-proof use is always considered an amazing achievement. Think vertical. Think seamless. Think C2C2C. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can morph defiantly will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to visualize courageously. What does the standard industry industry jargon "vertical" really mean? If you synthesize ultra-virtually, you may have to recontextualize mega-macro-cyber-efficiently. The angel investors factor can be summed up in one word: killer. What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! The ability to revolutionize efficiently leads to the capability to orchestrate globally. Think micro-open-source. ABC is the industry leader of value-added user interfaces. Imagine a combination of XSLT and J++. What does it really mean to visualize "magnetically"? A company that can maximize correctly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to transform faithfully. What does the standard industry commonly-accepted commonly-accepted buzzword "infrastructures" really mean? Your budget for deploying should be at least twice your budget for cultivating. Imagine a combination of Flash and IIS. Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least twice your budget for scaling. Think micro-seamless. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration. Do you have a game plan to become synergistic? A company that can optimize correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to revolutionize elegantly. What does it really mean to whiteboard "extensibly"?