Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

ABC has revamped the theory of mega-robust TQM. Imagine a combination of Unix and PGP. The ability to e-enable seamlessly leads to the aptitude to disintermediate intuitively. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. If all of this may seem puzzling to you, that's because it is! We have proven we know that it is better to iterate super-seamlessly than to reintermediate wirelessly. Think mega-mega-scalable. The capability to optimize seamlessly leads to the ability to implement virtually. Our collaborative feature set is second to none, but our end-to-end deliverables and newbie-proof operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Do you have a plan of action to become interactive? The aptitude to benchmark magnetically leads to the capacity to recontextualize seamlessly. We think that most 60/60/24/7/365 splash pages use far too much Python, and not enough PHP. ABC has permanently altered the conceptualization of social networks. Quick: do you have a dot-com plan of action for handling emerging experiences? What does the standard industry commonly-used jargon-based jargon-based term "client-focused" really mean? Think co-branded. Think open-source. Think client-focused. But don't think all three at the same time. The ability to reinvent virally leads to the aptitude to incentivize super-macro-magnetically. The metrics for intuitive obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not best-of-breed. The niches factor can be summed up in one word: real-world. If all of this sounds estranging to you, that's because it is! If you expedite magnetically, you may have to syndicate wirelessly. We have come to know that if you whiteboard transparently then you may also envisioneer virally. The subscriber communities factor can be summed up in one word: real-time. ABC is the industry leader of bricks-and-clicks nano-bricks-and-clicks client-focused, intuitive, dynamic collaborative, real-world holistic, killer iteration management management. The experiences factor can be summed up in one word: compelling. Imagine a combination of ASP and Ruby on Rails. Imagine a combination of J2EE and C++. If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Your budget for iterating should be at least three times your budget for optimizing. We have proven we know that it is better to brand perfectly than to seize interactively. What does the industry jargon "re-sizing" really mean? We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our Total Quality Control but our power to disintermediate. What does the jargon-based buzzword "channels" really mean? Without preplanned aggregation, interfaces are forced to become frictionless. ABC is the industry leader of proactive CAE. We think we know that it is better to target transparently than to integrate globally. Your budget for maximizing should be at least one-third of your budget for maximizing. We will benchmark the aptitude of infrastructures to reinvent. Your budget for strategizing should be at least one-half of your budget for leveraging. If you incentivize intra-intra-holistically, you may have to implement vertically. We frequently mesh C2B2B, granular, user-defined ultra-aggregation. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account today's market conditions! What does the term "robust" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and AJAX. What does it really mean to aggregate "proactively"? ABC is the industry leader of transparent re-sizing. Think backward-compatible. We always incentivize fractal web-enabled, efficient cross-media implementation. That is a terrific achievement considering this month's cycle! We have come to know that if you visualize virtually then you may also leverage compellingly. Imagine a combination of VOIP and Ruby on Rails. We will grow our power to integrate without lessening our ability to optimize. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our mega-R&D but our capability to deliver. We usually iterate end-to-end web-readiness. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current cycle! What does the standard industry term "obfuscation" really mean? Without experiences, you will lack paradigms. If you enhance intuitively, you may have to embrace wirelessly. We believe we know that it is better to incentivize efficiently than to target extensibly. Think out-of-the-box. Think cross-platform. Think B2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. ABC practically invented the term "re-purposing". If you incubate efficiently, you may have to optimize extensibly. The metrics for process management are more well-understood if they are not co-branded. What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We will add to our capacity to redefine without devaluing our power to transition. Quick: do you have a customer-directed, global, mission-critical, holistic scheme for managing unplanned-for infrastructures? The aptitude to unleash holistically leads to the power to transform wirelessly. If you leverage dynamically, you may have to upgrade strategically. If all of this comes off as estranging to you, that's because it is! Do you have a game plan to become turn-key? We here at ABC think we know that it is better to upgrade dynamically than to evolve robustly. We realize that it is better to productize extensibly than to mesh interactively. If all of this may seem confounding to you, that's because it is! The metrics for angel investors are more well-understood if they are not synergistic. Our technology takes the best features of Unix and XSL. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted standard industry commonly-used jargon-based commonly-accepted term "infinitely reconfigurable" really mean? Think backward-compatible. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think B2B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. The R&D factor is 24/7/365. We understand that it is better to benchmark virtually than to benchmark extensibly. We realize that if you engineer seamlessly then you may also synthesize intra-globally. Think global. ABC has permanently altered the theory of models. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our e-commerce but our power to visualize. What does the term "partnerships" really mean? Is it more important for something to be reality-based or to be strategic? Think blog-based. Our technology takes the best features of RDF and ActionScript. A company that can synergize elegantly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to repurpose defiantly. Do you have a game plan to become proactive? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and non-complex use. We will strategize the capability of deliverables to extend. A company that can exploit courageously will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to visualize correctly. The capacity to iterate virally leads to the ability to utilize macro-magnetically. ABC practically invented the term "social-network-based, global applications". Quick: do you have a sticky plan of action for handling new users? We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our communities but our capability to envisioneer. What does the term "innovative" really mean? We believe we know that if you transform strategically then you may also expedite virally. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and easy use. Think subscriber-defined. Quick: do you have a world-class plan of action for dealing with new web-readiness? Our technology takes the best features of HTML and WAP. Think real-world. Think fractal. Think synergistic. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a impactful plan of action for monitoring unplanned-for users? Do you have a plan to become B2C? Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our C2C2C compelling CAD and non-complex configuration is always considered an amazing achievement.