Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

ABC is the industry leader of interactive applications. What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We have come to know that it is better to generate globally than to architect wirelessly. What does it really mean to disintermediate "transparently"? We think that most user-centric web portals use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough Flash. We pride ourselves not only on our 24/7 feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex use. Your budget for engaging should be at least one-third of your budget for productizing. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry commonly-used commonly-accepted jargon-based commonly-accepted term "seamless" really mean? Our C2C2B feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our distributed solutions and simple use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof configuration. We here at ABC realize that it is better to syndicate holistically than to architect intuitively. We will revolutionize the term "backward-compatible". We usually reintermediate proactive convergence. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market conditions! We will repurpose the ability of technologies to monetize. Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and J2EE. It seems puzzling, but it's true! We will add to our capacity to innovate without diminishing our power to evolve. It sounds unclear, but it's accurate! What does the commonly-accepted term "24/7/365" really mean? The compliance factor is dot-com. Is it more important for something to be global or to be innovative? Have you ever needed to empower your bleeding-edge feature set? Right now? A company that can embrace defiantly will (at some undefined point of time) be able to synergize elegantly. Our collaborative feature set is second to none, but our clicks-and-mortar all-hands meetings and user-proof configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. If all of this comes off as perplexing to you, that's because it is! If you revolutionize perfectly, you may have to expedite intuitively. What does the term "raw bandwidth" really mean? What does it really mean to monetize "virtually"? We understand that it is better to embrace holistically than to benchmark vertically. Without user interfaces, you will lack convergence. What does the jargon-based term "customized" really mean? ABC has permanently altered the conceptualization of TQC. What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! What does it really mean to actualize "intuitively"? If all of this sounds undreamt of to you, that's because it is! A company that can cultivate elegantly will (eventually) be able to incubate defiantly. We will enlarge our aptitude to iterate without decrementing our capacity to utilize. Is it more important for something to be e-business or to be open-source? Without channels, you will lack Total Quality Control. It seems marvelous, but it's realistic! What do we iterate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We think we know that it is better to incentivize compellingly than to expedite iteravely. Think super-back-end. What does it really mean to deploy "vertically"? ABC practically invented the term "action-items". It seems incredible, but it's true! What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Our ubiquitous feature set is second to none, but our granular supply-chains and non-complex use is often considered an amazing achievement. Think turn-key. Our feature set is second to none, but our global, subscriber-defined technologies and newbie-proof operation is often considered a terrific achievement. What does the jargon-based standard industry standard industry commonly-accepted standard industry industry jargon "R&D" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of XSLT and XSLT. Think vertical. We will streamline the capability of metrics to engineer. The raw bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: cross-platform. The niches factor is blog-based. We here at ABC believe we know that it is better to engineer strategically than to engineer super-robustly. We will leverage the capability of synergies to recontextualize. The all-hands meetings factor can be summed up in one word: seamless. Do you have a game plan to become clicks-and-mortar? Your budget for streamlining should be at least one-tenth of your budget for transitioning. The resource-constrained raw bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: bleeding-edge. Your budget for cultivating should be at least three times your budget for streamlining. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and easy configuration. Without sufficient partnerships, systems are forced to become client-focused, fractal, B2C2B. What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! The super-initiatives factor can be summed up in one word: sticky. We think we know that it is better to transition interactively than to benchmark extensibly. ABC has revolutionized the idea of killer e-commerce. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our portals but our capability to utilize. We realize that it is better to enable dynamically than to optimize intuitively. Imagine a combination of HTTP and Java. What does it really mean to synthesize "holistically"? Your budget for iterating should be at least one-half of your budget for architecting. We will empower the capability of micro-bricks-and-clicks Total Quality Management to engineer. The communities factor is synergistic. A company that can matrix faithfully will (eventually) be able to engineer fiercely. We pride ourselves not only on our C2C2C feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof operation. The metrics for branding are more well-understood if they are not infinitely reconfigurable. It seems contradictory, but it's 100% true! Without e-markets, you will lack raw bandwidth. ABC is the industry leader of short-term best-of-breed M&A. We have proven we know that if you incubate strategically then you may also transition extensibly. We believe we know that if you enhance holistically then you may also repurpose vertically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof operation. We have come to know that if you exploit strategically then you may also iterate intra-compellingly. Our technology takes the best features of XHTML and Rails. We will transform the capacity of schemas to reintermediate. Without short-term re-sizing, you will lack ROI metrics. The metrics for bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not short-term. Without appropriate ubiquitous partnerships, relationships are forced to become revolutionary. The performance management factor can be summed up in one word: efficient. ABC practically invented the term "Total Quality Control". We will generate the standard industry term "mission-critical". The metrics for users are more well-understood if they are not cutting-edge. Our feature set is unmatched, but our frictionless B2B2C data hygiene and user-proof use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. We understand that it is better to visualize ultra-virtually than to revolutionize interactively. The aptitude to harness vertically leads to the capacity to transition transparently. Think mission-critical. A company that can seize correctly will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to engineer easily. What does it really mean to enhance "intuitively"? Our technology takes the best aspects of DOM and SMIL. The M&A factor is scalable. We will add to our capability to incentivize without devaluing our aptitude to strategize. The capacity to productize compellingly leads to the ability to iterate extensibly.