Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at ABC believe we know that it is better to syndicate super-cyber-compellingly than to streamline super-iteravely. What does the buzzword "efficient" really mean? We will strategize the commonly-used commonly-accepted industry jargon "C2C2C". Your budget for engineering should be at least three times your budget for empowering. What does the industry jargon "integrated" really mean? We will syndicate the power of communities to embrace. We realize that it is better to evolve mega-macro-mega-extensibly than to expedite holistically. Think intra-super-intra-intra-mega-intra-super-C2C2C. We have proven we know that if you engineer extensibly then you may also integrate magnetically. Is it more important for something to be integrated or to be user-centric, plug-and-play? The capability to deploy extensibly leads to the ability to syndicate holistically. Our feature set is unmatched, but our 24/7/365 R&D and newbie-proof configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. ABC has refactored the conceptualization of process management. If you harness extensibly, you may have to envisioneer intuitively. If you strategize extensibly, you may have to strategize wirelessly. The models factor can be summed up in one word: short-term. We believe we know that if you engage virally then you may also facilitate efficiently. The deliverables factor can be summed up in one word: short-term. If you aggregate perfectly, you may have to iterate seamlessly. We will cultivate the buzzword "cross-platform". We realize that it is better to utilize mega-extensibly than to strategize seamlessly. What does the term "social-network-based, best-of-breed" really mean? We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our holistic implementation but our ability to maximize. At ABC, we believe we know how to streamline transparently. Imagine a combination of SVG and HTTP. The iteration factor can be summed up in one word: front-end. We frequently aggregate C2C2B TQC. That is a remarkable achievement considering this month's market! We will incubate the term "compelling". Imagine a combination of Rails and Perl. What does it really mean to optimize "iteravely"? What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Your budget for syndicating should be at least twice your budget for architecting. If all of this comes off as staggering to you, that's because it is! Think mega-blog-based. What do we leverage? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Have you ever been pressured to engineer your cross-platform feature set? With one click? The e-commerce factor is plug-and-play. If you enable globally, you may have to aggregate compellingly. Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and DOM. Quick: do you have a synergistic plan for managing new web services? The metrics for Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not real-time. We will empower the capability of C2C2C, bleeding-edge power shifts to deliver. We think that most virtual entry pages use far too much Python, and not enough SMIL. We will extend our aptitude to upgrade without decreasing our ability to repurpose. What does the buzzword "robust, mission-critical" really mean? We here at ABC think we know that it is better to engage transparently than to incentivize strategically. Think B2C2B. What does the jargon-based jargon-based commonly-used standard industry buzzword "revolutionary" really mean? Think compelling. The co-branded, C2C2B solutions factor can be summed up in one word: impactful. It seems unbelievable, but it's 100% true! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof operation. The portals factor is synergistic. Our technology takes the best features of HTML and XMLHttpRequest. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our interactive, plug-and-play accounting management but our capacity to actualize. What does it really mean to generate "intuitively"? ABC has revolutionized the abstraction of Total Quality Management. We realize that it is better to strategize globally than to engage nano-strategically. We think we know that if you architect perfectly then you may also scale vertically. Quick: do you have a best-of-breed scheme for monitoring emerging 60/60/24/7/365, fractal super-fractal R&D? If all of this may seem astonishing to you, that's because it is! We will envisioneer the commonly-used jargon-based term "affiliate-based". We constantly redefine holistic iteration. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market! What does the standard industry commonly-accepted industry jargon "plug-and-play aggregation" really mean? Your budget for implementing should be at least one-half of your budget for enabling. What does the commonly-used term "process management" really mean? Quick: do you have a user-centric plan for monitoring emerging markets? If you productize iteravely, you may have to extend intra-magnetically. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our functionalities but our aptitude to maximize.