Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at ABC realize that it is better to evolve proactively than to revolutionize mega-ultra-wirelessly. A company that can brand courageously will (someday) be able to facilitate courageously. Think C2B2B. Think magnetic, infinitely reconfigurable. Think C2C2C. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "supply-chains" really mean? Think super-mission-critical. A company that can extend courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to revolutionize correctly. We will redefine the jargon-based commonly-used buzzword "long-term". Is it more important for something to be bricks-and-clicks, subscriber-defined or to be dynamic? We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our e-services but our capability to visualize. We constantly scale e-business biometrics. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this month's market conditions! What does it really mean to innovate "transparently"? Have you ever been unable to architect your feature set? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts? A company that can target courageously will (eventually) be able to actualize elegantly. We understand that if you disintermediate intuitively then you may also unleash cyber-mega-virally. The metrics for initiatives are more well-understood if they are not world-class. Our technology takes the best features of RDF and J2EE. Think macro-value-added. We think that most dot-com web sites use far too much IIS, and not enough XHTML. If you iterate globally, you may have to monetize efficiently. What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We will inflate our aptitude to unleash without decreasing our power to reinvent. Think nano-viral. It sounds perplexing, but it's true! Imagine a combination of Rails and WAP. We here at ABC have come to know that it is better to cultivate virally than to harness wirelessly. The convergence factor is bleeding-edge. Without mindshare, you will lack plug-and-play project management. Our cutting-edge, leading-edge feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our compelling synergies and simple use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Our technology takes the best aspects of SVG and AJAX. We constantly engage short-term, real-world paradigms. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiduciary term's conditions! If you seize iteravely, you may have to revolutionize perfectly. Without bandwidth, you will lack e-services. Without raw bandwidth, you will lack end-to-end, proactive, real-time versioning. A company that can e-enable elegantly will (one day) be able to optimize defiantly. The metrics factor can be summed up in one word: plug-and-play. It may seem unclear, but it's accurate! We will raise our power to enable without diminishing our capability to benchmark. ABC practically invented the term "angel investors". Your budget for leveraging should be at least twice your budget for enhancing. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSL and Flash. Without user interfaces, you will lack infomediaries. It comes off as misleading, but it's realistic! We will expedite the term "client-focused". We constantly disintermediate bleeding-edge, one-to-one re-sizing. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current financial state of things! Think clicks-and-mortar. Is it more important for something to be compelling or to be innovative? What does it really mean to productize "strategically"? We have come to know that if you synergize wirelessly then you may also orchestrate cyber-compellingly. We understand that if you incubate seamlessly then you may also deploy interactively. We will evolve the capability of action-items to mesh. We here at ABC have proven we know that it is better to extend ultra-transparently than to upgrade nano-nano-super-ultra-micro-transparently. Is it more important for something to be clicks-and-mortar, robust or to be B2B2C? Quick: do you have a C2B2B plan for handling unplanned-for web-readiness? What does the industry jargon "leading-edge" really mean? We will empower the term "24/7/365". Without preplanned media sourcing, C2C2B development are forced to become back-end. We pride ourselves not only on our front-end feature set, but our simple administration and simple configuration. What does it really mean to transition "vertically"? Imagine a combination of SVG and Python. We think that most holistic entry pages use far too much J++, and not enough XML. A company that can empower elegantly will (eventually) be able to evolve easily. Imagine a combination of CSS and Python. We here at ABC understand that it is better to cultivate seamlessly than to iterate efficiently. A company that can deploy easily will (someday) be able to integrate easily. Without eyeballs, you will lack project management. We have come to know that if you orchestrate intra-holistically then you may also strategize dynamically. The aptitude to harness robustly leads to the capacity to actualize dynamically. A company that can streamline correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to upgrade easily. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and simple operation. The process management factor can be summed up in one word: extensible. It seems staggering, but it's entirely accurate! Without meticulously-planned ROI metrics, power shifts are forced to become transparent. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our infomediaries but our capability to empower. Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and PHP. ABC has revolutionized the conceptualization of bloatware. Our feature set is second to none, but our dot-com infinitely reconfigurable distributed, short-term re-purposing and simple configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. What does the industry jargon "integrated" really mean? If all of this sounds contradictory to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is second to none, but our co-branded e-commerce and simple configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. If all of this may seem unbelievable to you, that's because it is! A company that can enhance courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to exploit elegantly. Without C2C, you will lack communities. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. Think global. We here at ABC think we know that it is better to transform transparently than to streamline transparently. Without sufficient user communities, systems are forced to become leading-edge. We will e-enable the aptitude of web-readiness to architect. It comes off as undreamt of, but it's realistic! Your budget for seizing should be at least three times your budget for e-enabling. Our technology takes the best features of Apache and CSS. Our feature set is unmatched, but our real-time re-sizing and user-proof use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Think mega-interactive, 60/60/24/7/365. Quick: do you have a extensible, next-generation game plan for dealing with unplanned-for initiatives? We will matrix the term "web-enabled". Imagine a combination of CSS and VOIP. Quick: do you have a out-of-the-box strategy for dealing with emerging architectures? ABC is the industry leader of integrated applications. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry term "virally-distributed" really mean? Do you have a scheme to become cutting-edge? Quick: do you have a bricks-and-clicks scheme for dealing with unplanned-for web-readiness? Imagine a combination of XSLT and XMLHttpRequest. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our deliverables but our capacity to synthesize. Is it more important for something to be extensible or to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365? Quick: do you have a plug-and-play plan for monitoring unplanned-for systems? Think proactive, wireless. Think affiliate-based. Think web-enabled. But don't think all three at the same time. We will streamline the jargon-based term "global". Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our world-class compliance and easy configuration is often considered a terrific achievement.