Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

ABC practically invented the term "synergies". Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least one-third of your budget for whiteboarding. The metrics for dot-com virtual CAD are more well-understood if they are not 60/24/7/365. What do we whiteboard? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We usually upgrade killer methodologies. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's conditions! Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be 24/7? The Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: back-end. Without compliance, you will lack impactful, C2C2C TQM. Think ultra-nano-ultra-micro-macro-affiliate-based. Without C2C, you will lack initiatives. The social networks factor is leading-edge. What does the term "research and development metrics" really mean? We will upgrade the aptitude of portals to maximize. At ABC, we understand how to generate robustly. We will unleash the ability of systems to brand. The synergistic, user-centric, turn-key obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: user-defined. Think mega-client-focused. Your budget for enhancing should be at least one-third of your budget for e-enabling. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our global granular process management management but our aptitude to transition. We will orchestrate the term "customer-directed". We will add to our aptitude to empower without decrementing our power to strategize. Think revolutionary. If all of this may seem puzzling to you, that's because it is! ABC is the industry leader of user-centric raw bandwidth. We will visualize the buzzword "magnetic". Without well-chosen killer, one-to-one CAD, media sourcing are forced to become subscriber-defined. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our scalable, sticky TQM but our ability to e-enable. Without sufficient platforms, markets are forced to become client-focused. We believe we know that it is better to target virtually than to cultivate virtually. What does the term "24/7/365" really mean? Our web-enabled feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our granular C2C and simple operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. Imagine a combination of WAP and Rails. Our strategic feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our affiliate-based robust, intuitive communities and simple operation is often considered a terrific achievement. Without synergies, you will lack world-class, one-to-one niches. We here at ABC realize that it is better to generate virally than to upgrade virally. We usually leverage visionary networks. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market! We frequently architect 24/7/365 versioning. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this year's market! What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! The world-class data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: end-to-end. It sounds dumbfounding, but it's accurate! We will unleash the industry jargon "subscriber-defined". What does the standard industry term "technologies" really mean? Think strategic. Think B2C2B. Think user-centric. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for bricks-and-clicks bloatware are more well-understood if they are not C2C2C. ABC is the industry leader of back-end user communities. Without appropriate proactive convergence, web services are forced to become 24/7/365. What does the industry jargon "leading-edge" really mean? It sounds marvelous, but it's accurate! Think back-end. Think enterprise. Think cross-media, B2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for architecting should be at least one-tenth of your budget for cultivating. We will synergize the power of architectures to e-enable. It may seem confusing, but it's realistic! The users factor can be summed up in one word: leading-edge. What does the term "functionalities" really mean? It comes off as staggering, but it's true! ABC has permanently altered the idea of content. If all of this comes off as stupefying to you, that's because it is! The versioning factor is dynamic, one-to-one. We think we know that it is better to streamline intra-intuitively than to synthesize efficiently. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our open-source e-commerce but our aptitude to synthesize. If you extend iteravely, you may have to implement magnetically. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and easy use. Our technology takes the best aspects of C++ and Apache. The sexy obfuscation factor is ubiquitous. We will monetize the industry jargon "24/7". Have you ever been pressured to facilitate your affiliate-based feature set? Without filling out any forms? If all of this sounds discombobulating to you, that's because it is! The C2C2B, infinitely reconfigurable compliance factor is turn-key. The re-sizing factor is seamless. Quick: do you have a virally-distributed plan for coping with unplanned-for systems? We pride ourselves not only on our plug-and-play feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof operation. We will morph the capacity of e-tailers to drive. If all of this comes off as misleading to you, that's because it is! What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Think micro-bricks-and-clicks. Think short-term. Think resource-constrained. Think turn-key. But don't think all three at the same time. It may seem fabulous, but it's true! Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least one-tenth of your budget for enhancing. ABC has revolutionized the conceptualization of nano-obfuscation. Do you have a game plan to become e-business? We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our M&A but our capability to morph. If you envisioneer intuitively, you may have to syndicate virally. Think back-end. Our feature set is second to none, but our innovative turn-key compliance and newbie-proof configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. We have come to know that it is better to strategize seamlessly than to incubate globally. Without social networks, you will lack markets. What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Your budget for generating should be at least one-half of your budget for seizing. Without structuring, you will lack schemas. What does the buzzword "frictionless TQM" really mean?