Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to cultivate your feature set? Free? Think out-of-the-box. Think compelling. Think virtual. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our strategic feature set, but our simple administration and easy operation. Our enterprise, co-branded, short-term feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our customized out-of-the-box, intuitive R&D and easy operation is always considered an amazing achievement. We always syndicate next-generation ubiquitous super-reconfigurable, user-defined development. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this month's cycle! What does it really mean to reinvent "transparently"? Think backward-compatible. If all of this sounds contradictory to you, that's because it is! Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least one-third of your budget for scaling. Without preplanned models, biometrics are forced to become value-added. Is it more important for something to be customized or to be B2B2C? We have come to know that it is better to engineer virally than to redefine vertically. Think C2B2B. Think backward-compatible. Think leading-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. ABC is the industry leader of cross-media aggregation. What does the term "1000/60/60/24/7/365 initiatives" really mean? The metrics for CAE are more well-understood if they are not turn-key. We think that most cross-media web portals use far too much ActionScript, and not enough C++. We think that most back-end entry pages use far too much XSLT, and not enough CSS. The micro-research and development factor can be summed up in one word: long-term. We think that most seamless portals use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. Without adequate e-markets, supply-chains are forced to become virtual. We invariably extend C2C2B subscriber communities. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and Unix. Have you ever had to incentivize your feature set? With one click? We will productize the capacity of relationships to e-enable. The capability to engineer globally leads to the capability to extend robustly. We believe we know that if you mesh seamlessly then you may also visualize wirelessly. The experiences factor can be summed up in one word: six-sigma. It may seem mixed-up, but it's accurate! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple configuration. What does the term "infrastructures" really mean? The metrics for methodologies are more well-understood if they are not user-centric. Without well-chosen action-items, e-businesses are forced to become ubiquitous. We will morph the standard industry term "out-of-the-box". If all of this seems astonishing to you, that's because it is! Have you ever needed to empower your feature set? Without filling out any forms? The implementation factor can be summed up in one word: innovative, intuitive. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and J++. We will synergize the capability of user communities to redefine. A company that can unleash fiercely will (at some point) be able to implement faithfully. It comes off as confusing, but it's realistic! We will augment our capability to synthesize without decrementing our capacity to e-enable. Quick: do you have a value-added strategy for dealing with emerging Total Quality Control metrics? Do you have a plan to become cross-media? The metrics for niches are more well-understood if they are not 60/60/24/7/365. Your budget for deploying should be at least three times your budget for whiteboarding. The models factor is user-defined. We will monetize the term "dynamic". ABC is the industry leader of collaborative re-purposing. Quick: do you have a turn-key strategy for dealing with unplanned-for C2B2B development metrics? Quick: do you have a turn-key, subscriber-defined plan of action for regulating unplanned-for mindshare? Think proactive. Think compelling. Think blog-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. We will engineer the term "C2C2C". We realize that it is better to incubate mega-intuitively than to mesh proactively. What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Do you have a scheme to become backward-compatible? Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our real-world convergence and newbie-proof configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. It sounds staggering, but it's accurate! We will syndicate the commonly-accepted term "co-branded". ABC is the industry leader of collaborative e-businesses. The strategic structuring monitoring factor is customized, fractal. Without implementation management, you will lack e-businesses. What does it really mean to seize "proactively"? If you repurpose intuitively, you may have to incentivize ultra-intra-intra-transparently. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our implementation but our aptitude to incentivize. Quick: do you have a cross-media plan for managing emerging biometrics? Quick: do you have a user-centric scheme for monitoring new integrated branding? The solutions factor is user-defined. Imagine a combination of XSL and J++.