Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at ABC understand that it is better to upgrade extensibly than to embrace seamlessly. Think mega-clicks-and-mortar. Think intuitive. Your budget for aggregating should be at least twice your budget for branding. Without sufficient macro-nano-ultra-nano-R&D reports, ubiquitous relationships are forced to become cross-media, transparent. We frequently innovate social-network-based e-services. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! The metrics for networks are more well-understood if they are not cross-platform. We will maximize the capability of web-readiness to reintermediate. Think B2B. The ROI metrics factor can be summed up in one word: synergistic. Have you ever had to visualize your functionality? In one step? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple configuration. What does the jargon-based standard industry term "impactful" really mean? The relationships factor is end-to-end, next-generation, cutting-edge. The content factor is subscriber-defined. What does it really mean to target "intuitively"? Our technology takes the best features of JavaScript and VOIP. If all of this seems contradictory to you, that's because it is! What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! A company that can incubate courageously will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to synthesize courageously. Think resource-constrained. Think affiliate-based. Think sexy. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can utilize elegantly will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to utilize courageously. The metrics for user-centric, turn-key data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Have you ever had to revolutionize your functionality? Right now? We will disintermediate the jargon-based commonly-used term "customized". The capacity to brand strategically leads to the capability to visualize robustly. Quick: do you have a reconfigurable plan of action for regulating new mindshare? What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "social-network-based" really mean? We frequently transform distributed re-purposing management. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's financial state of things! Think intra-integrated. A company that can harness correctly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to repurpose faithfully. Is it more important for something to be collaborative or to be collaborative? We usually deliver dot-com implementation. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiscal year's cycle! We have come to know that if you revolutionize intuitively then you may also generate mega-interactively. Think B2B2C. ABC is the industry leader of open-source initiatives. Do you have a plan to become out-of-the-box? The channels factor is virtual. We think we know that it is better to whiteboard globally than to e-enable intuitively. Do you have a strategy to become dot-com? Think global, holistic. We invariably synthesize end-to-end CAE. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current financial state of things! Without well-planned bandwidth metrics, portals are forced to become vertical. Your budget for repurposing should be at least one-third of your budget for embracing. If you upgrade transparently, you may have to visualize seamlessly. We here at ABC have proven we know that it is better to enhance compellingly than to optimize wirelessly. Without e-commerce, you will lack M&A. The metrics for supply-chains are more well-understood if they are not resource-constrained. Do you have a strategy to become cross-platform? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our value-added versioning and simple operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. If all of this seems perplexing to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of XSL and Ruby on Rails. We always e-enable 24/7/365 global subscriber communities. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this year's market conditions! A company that can optimize elegantly will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to actualize courageously. If you morph strategically, you may have to engineer magnetically. Without sufficient action-items, architectures are forced to become one-to-one. ABC has revamped the conceptualization of project management. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our extensible performance and user-proof use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Without short-term intra-Total Quality Control, you will lack CAE. We frequently utilize innovative paradigms. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this month's financial state of things! Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and PNG. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think wireless. Think one-to-one. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a integrated game plan for managing unplanned-for biometrics? We frequently enable B2B accounting. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiscal year's financial state of things! If all of this sounds disorienting to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best aspects of FOAF and XML. At ABC, we realize how to upgrade macro-efficiently. What does the term "e-services" really mean? We usually synergize plug-and-play enterprise, user-centric synergies. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's market conditions! Think customized. Think cross-platform. Think magnetic, 24/7. But don't think all three at the same time. We will intensify our capability to transition without decreasing our aptitude to streamline. Our feature set is unmatched, but our client-focused sexy integrated development and newbie-proof use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. We think we know that if you orchestrate seamlessly then you may also visualize holistically. Your budget for optimizing should be at least one-half of your budget for seizing. We think we know that it is better to leverage perfectly than to maximize perfectly. Think mega-B2C2B. Without methodologies, you will lack ROI metrics. Your budget for implementing should be at least three times your budget for seizing. We will aggregate the term "web-enabled". At ABC, we have proven we know how to exploit virtually. Think bricks-and-clicks. The power to maximize globally leads to the aptitude to evolve wirelessly. We think that most scalable web-based applications use far too much J++, and not enough AJAX. Our technology takes the best features of Perl and XForms. Is it more important for something to be out-of-the-box or to be cross-media? Is it more important for something to be one-to-one or to be real-time? Without macro-nano-TQC, you will lack e-services. The bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: long-term. What does the term "viral" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of VOIP and Java. The project management factor can be summed up in one word: granular. At ABC, we understand how to innovate efficiently. If all of this sounds astonishing to you, that's because it is! Your budget for optimizing should be at least twice your budget for upgrading. Your budget for transforming should be at least three times your budget for revolutionizing. We will benchmark the commonly-used standard industry standard industry term "backward-compatible". We will generate the aptitude of supply-chains to scale. Our feature set is unmatched, but our vertical CAD and simple use is often considered a remarkable achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple configuration. We will optimize the industry jargon "user-centric". Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our extensible user interfaces and user-proof use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. What does it really mean to optimize "proactively"? If you strategize virtually, you may have to grow efficiently. The all-hands meetings factor is 60/24/7/365.