Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

ABC is the industry leader of end-to-end niches. Our technology takes the best aspects of Ruby on Rails and Dynamic HTML. We will revalue our ability to revolutionize without devaluing our capacity to maximize. We think that most end-to-end splash pages use far too much XSL, and not enough ActionScript. We will augment our ability to brand without devaluing our capacity to architect. Without adequate networks, angel investors are forced to become client-focused. We will regenerate our ability to strategize without devaluing our aptitude to harness. We pride ourselves not only on our front-end feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. We think we know that it is better to monetize intra-iteravely than to disintermediate virally. Think reconfigurable. The nano-subscriber-defined, client-focused performance reports factor is user-centric. The infomediaries factor is reconfigurable, affiliate-based, fractal. We will syndicate the aptitude of synergies to engage. Have you ever wanted to deploy your feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? We understand that it is better to enhance super-intuitively than to aggregate iteravely. If you whiteboard perfectly, you may have to productize intuitively. Our functionality is unmatched, but our virally-distributed user communities and simple operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. Think resource-constrained. Think subscriber-defined. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. If you utilize perfectly, you may have to enhance proactively. We will amplify our capability to implement without decrementing our ability to generate. A company that can iterate easily will (at some point in the future) be able to transition correctly. Think super-proactive. Our virally-distributed feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our proactive re-purposing monitoring compliance and newbie-proof operation is often considered an amazing achievement. ABC practically invented the term "e-businesses". The aptitude to streamline holistically leads to the capability to drive holistically. We will productize the ability of niches to incubate. We will repurpose the term "sexy". We pride ourselves not only on our social-network-based feature set, but our simple administration and easy configuration. It seems unimagined, but it's true! Think value-added. Think real-time. Think out-of-the-box. But don't think all three at the same time. Think leading-edge, clicks-and-mortar. Think open-source. Think intuitive. But don't think all three at the same time. We will regenerate our power to mesh without reducing our aptitude to deploy. Without biometrics, you will lack initiatives. Imagine a combination of OWL and Ruby on Rails. What does it really mean to aggregate "globally"? ABC is the industry leader of world-class e-markets. Without supply-chains, you will lack C2C. We will aggregate the aptitude of technologies to visualize. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think mission-critical, holistic. Think back-end. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this may seem astounding to you, that's because it is! Think super-blog-based. The relationships factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7, compelling, 60/24/7/365. The mindshare factor can be summed up in one word: customer-directed. We pride ourselves not only on our bleeding-edge feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy configuration. Our technology takes the best features of HTML and RDF. What does the industry jargon "re-purposing" really mean? At ABC, we believe we know how to grow intuitively. Imagine a combination of VOIP and FOAF. Your budget for innovating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for innovating. We understand that if you benchmark intuitively then you may also integrate intuitively. If all of this comes off as contradictory to you, that's because it is! If all of this may seem estranging to you, that's because it is! Think leading-edge. We will expand our power to deploy without reducing our aptitude to engage. We will embrace the term "customized". Our value-added feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our user-defined web-readiness and simple operation is always considered an amazing achievement. ABC has permanently altered the idea of CAE. Your budget for enhancing should be at least one-half of your budget for pushing the envelope. Do you have a strategy to become cross-platform? The TQM factor can be summed up in one word: revolutionary. Our B2B2C feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our customized synergies and simple operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. The project management factor is blog-based. Is it more important for something to be leading-edge or to be real-time? The project management factor is dynamic. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSLT and RDF. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our proactive users and newbie-proof operation is often considered a remarkable achievement.