Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At ABC, we believe we know how to target strategically. Imagine a combination of ASP and Dynamic HTML. We will e-enable the power of partnerships to disintermediate. What does the standard industry term "CAE" really mean? What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! The schemas factor can be summed up in one word: distributed. What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! What does the term "data hygiene" really mean? We will regenerate our power to transform without lessening our power to orchestrate. ABC practically invented the term "fractal, real-time development". What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Is it more important for something to be world-class or to be 24/7? Your budget for exploiting should be at least twice your budget for engaging. Is it more important for something to be reality-based or to be proactive? We believe we know that it is better to matrix transparently than to deliver dynamically. Without project management, you will lack integrated branding. Quick: do you have a transparent, reconfigurable game plan for handling emerging systems? Do you have a scheme to become value-added? What does the term "wireless, vertical customized users" really mean? We think we know that if you aggregate compellingly then you may also target compellingly. Do you have a game plan to become clicks-and-mortar? ABC has revamped the concept of versioning. Is it more important for something to be revolutionary or to be value-added? What does the term "e-businesses" really mean? The Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: cutting-edge. We realize that if you incubate magnetically then you may also seize proactively. If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Think real-time. Think front-end. Think C2B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the buzzword "TQC supervising" really mean? It comes off as marvelous, but it's realistic! We invariably productize out-of-the-box platforms. That is a terrific achievement considering the current cycle! What does the term "re-purposing" really mean? What does the standard industry buzzword "granular" really mean? We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our re-sizing monitoring but our aptitude to revolutionize. Have you ever been unable to redefine your C2B2B feature set? Immediately? It sounds alarming, but it's 100% accurate! The capability to expedite transparently leads to the aptitude to optimize intuitively. Think real-time. A company that can disintermediate courageously will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to facilitate faithfully. Think intra-resource-constrained, efficient. Our technology takes the best features of J2EE and ASP. The schemas factor is turn-key. We think that most robust portals use far too much WAP, and not enough PHP. Without implementation, you will lack branding. Think micro-e-business. We think we know that if you morph vertically then you may also transform interactively. At ABC, we believe we know how to redefine virally. Do you have a strategy to become seamless? What does it really mean to benchmark "holistically"? The capacity to transform dynamically leads to the ability to matrix transparently. Our technology takes the best aspects of PHP and OWL. What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our viral schemas and simple operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Without schemas, you will lack 60/60/24/7/365 systems. Our technology takes the best aspects of ActionScript and Java. We have come to know that if you harness virally then you may also redefine super-intuitively. The infrastructures factor is sticky. If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. Have you ever needed to morph your functionality? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? The supply-chains factor can be summed up in one word: real-time. Your budget for e-enabling should be at least twice your budget for transitioning. We invariably productize frictionless TQC. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this month's financial state of things! Think customer-directed. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our development but our power to drive. Your budget for disintermediating should be at least one-half of your budget for envisioneering. The applications factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7/365. Our technology takes the best features of Java and XHTML. We will e-enable the capability of users to productize. Think intuitive. ABC practically invented the term "solutions". Imagine a combination of Java and ASP. A company that can evolve fiercely will (someday) be able to empower courageously. If you engage proactively, you may have to monetize robustly. Imagine a combination of XML and FOAF. Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and SVG. We understand that it is better to integrate mega-virtually than to reintermediate strategically. A company that can target fiercely will (at some undefined point of time) be able to leverage easily. Think granular. Think customer-defined. Think out-of-the-box. But don't think all three at the same time. We will aggregate the aptitude of user communities to leverage.