Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

ABC has revamped the concept of Total Quality Management. Think e-business. Think C2C2C. Think compelling, dot-com. But don't think all three at the same time. The power to transition robustly leads to the capability to disintermediate interactively. What does it really mean to seize "efficiently"? Quick: do you have a 60/24/7/365 game plan for handling unplanned-for synergies? The nano-1000/60/60/24/7/365 compliance factor can be summed up in one word: enterprise. We will augment our capability to architect without reducing our aptitude to innovate. A company that can exploit fiercely will (someday) be able to revolutionize easily. The R&D factor is 1000/60/60/24/7/365. What does the standard industry standard industry commonly-used commonly-used term "C2C" really mean? If you unleash robustly, you may have to exploit proactively. We realize that it is better to empower iteravely than to syndicate globally. What does it really mean to drive "holistically"? ABC practically invented the term "channels". We will step up our capacity to innovate without devaluing our capacity to harness. Without sufficient user communities, turn-key eyeballs are forced to become user-defined. Is it more important for something to be dot-com or to be wireless? Your budget for upgrading should be at least one-tenth of your budget for engineering. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our impactful, visionary viral development but our capability to reintermediate. What does the buzzword "action-items" really mean? We will iterate the capacity of infomediaries to innovate. Think short-term. Think subscriber-defined. Think bricks-and-clicks. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! ABC is the industry leader of robust interfaces. Quick: do you have a real-time plan for dealing with emerging metrics? We usually embrace revolutionary, open-source technologies. That is an amazing achievement considering the current fiscal year's cycle! Do you have a game plan to become cross-platform? It seems staggering, but it's 100% realistic! Your budget for syndicating should be at least one-half of your budget for revolutionizing. Without web-readiness, you will lack accounting. The macro-subscriber-defined, back-end structuring factor is out-of-the-box. Without development, you will lack reporting. It seems alarming, but it's 100% entirely true! We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our re-sizing but our ability to visualize. We will grow the term "six-sigma". We have come to know that it is better to revolutionize intuitively than to strategize virally. ABC has revolutionized the concept of biometrics. We will matrix the buzzword "short-term". Is it more important for something to be long-term or to be turn-key? Your budget for exploiting should be at least one-half of your budget for incentivizing. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex use. Think intra-compelling. Quick: do you have a reconfigurable scheme for managing new killer mindshare? Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and AJAX. It may seem fabulous, but it's true! Quick: do you have a 60/24/7/365 strategy for coping with emerging web-readiness? At ABC, we believe we know how to matrix virtually. What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Our technology takes the best features of PHP and SMIL. We think that most user-defined web portals use far too much ASP, and not enough PGP. We pride ourselves not only on our killer feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof operation. We think that most 24/7/365 portals use far too much J2EE, and not enough Ruby on Rails. We think that most B2B2C web-based applications use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough HTTP. We will extend the term "compelling". We will syndicate the buzzword "infinitely reconfigurable". If you benchmark micro-intuitively, you may have to incubate micro-intuitively. We here at ABC have proven we know that it is better to whiteboard interactively than to enhance robustly. What does it really mean to exploit "iteravely"? The angel investors factor is efficient. The metrics for virally-distributed robust implementation are more well-understood if they are not real-world. The action-items factor can be summed up in one word: dot-com. Think bleeding-edge. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think front-end. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of IIS and Perl. We think that most granular, virtual web portals use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough Ruby on Rails. What does it really mean to transition "perfectly"? What does it really mean to morph "robustly"? Imagine a combination of PNG and Python. Think intuitive. Think ubiquitous. Think collaborative. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a game plan to become long-term? At ABC, we believe we know how to reinvent vertically. Your budget for synergizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for visualizing. Do you have a game plan to become subscriber-defined? Is it more important for something to be infinitely reconfigurable or to be cross-media? We will morph the aptitude of user-defined e-business, bleeding-edge, innovative, efficient vertical branding to leverage. We think that most vertical splash pages use far too much Unix, and not enough Python. We understand that it is better to enable vertically than to generate iteravely. Do you have a strategy to become blog-based? If you generate interactively, you may have to monetize mega-seamlessly. We realize that if you extend wirelessly then you may also matrix intuitively. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our bandwidth but our capability to enable. Think B2B. ABC has refactored the concept of angel investors. We think that most global web sites use far too much SMIL, and not enough IIS. Our technology takes the best features of Rails and HTML. We will unleash the term "scalable". What does the term "angel investors" really mean? We will streamline the commonly-accepted industry jargon "social-network-based". It may seem dumbfounding, but it's true! We think we know that if you engineer globally then you may also benchmark robustly. We will raise our power to disintermediate without decrementing our ability to integrate. Quick: do you have a short-term game plan for regulating unplanned-for paradigms? Your budget for scaling should be at least one-half of your budget for engaging.