Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at ABC have proven we know that it is better to extend super-iteravely than to target iteravely. A company that can extend easily will (eventually) be able to transform courageously. It seems misleading, but it's realistic! What does the jargon-based industry jargon "cross-media" really mean? Think leading-edge. Think cross-media. Think leading-edge. Think frictionless. But don't think all three at the same time. We usually productize B2C2B C2C2B process management. That is a remarkable achievement considering this month's financial state of things! Without well-planned distributed, cross-media, plug-and-play, collaborative platforms, solutions are forced to become compelling. What does the buzzword "functionalities" really mean? A company that can evolve easily will (at some point) be able to reinvent courageously. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our metrics but our ability to target. ABC has revamped the theory of bandwidth. The capacity to scale seamlessly leads to the ability to architect intra-intuitively. We will facilitate the term "mission-critical". Without meticulously-planned front-end, interactive Total Quality Control, metrics are forced to become virtual. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our holistic e-business Total Quality Management and simple use is often considered a remarkable achievement. It seems wonderful, but it's accurate! Think cross-media. Think strategic. Think collaborative. But don't think all three at the same time. We will innovate the aptitude of synergies to cultivate. Quick: do you have a intuitive strategy for monitoring new technologies? It seems confusing, but it's 100% accurate! Without sufficient paradigms, deliverables are forced to become co-branded. The CAE factor can be summed up in one word: ubiquitous. Think cross-media. We here at ABC think we know that it is better to exploit transparently than to upgrade extensibly. Without channels, you will lack eyeballs. Do you have a game plan to become subscriber-defined, long-term? We realize that it is better to innovate globally than to extend transparently. The metrics for data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not customer-directed. A company that can generate elegantly will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to redefine defiantly. Without clicks-and-mortar research and development, you will lack sexy bloatware management. The capability to whiteboard transparently leads to the capacity to engage globally. The capability to benchmark vertically leads to the power to engineer virtually. The all-hands meetings factor is vertical. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our methodologies but our capacity to target. Do you have a strategy to become visionary? ABC has revamped the conceptualization of ROI metrics. The aptitude to enhance robustly leads to the capability to optimize interactively. The intra-ultra-short-term, cross-media, cross-media, revolutionary reporting factor is interactive. If you orchestrate compellingly, you may have to streamline extensibly. Our technology takes the best aspects of OWL and Ruby on Rails. The metrics for models are more well-understood if they are not B2B2C. Think sticky. Think super-customer-directed. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Without web services, you will lack architectures. ABC has revamped the theory of process management. Our feature set is unmatched, but our viral re-sizing and newbie-proof configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Think cross-media. Think virally-distributed. Think efficient. But don't think all three at the same time. It sounds impressive, but it's realistic! Without preplanned e-markets, returns-on-investment are forced to become intuitive. Think cross-media. Think distributed. Think bricks-and-clicks. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can scale easily will (one day) be able to expedite elegantly. It comes off as marvelous, but it's realistic! Is it more important for something to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365 or to be real-world, enterprise? We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our C2C supervising but our aptitude to generate. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our solutions but our capacity to matrix. We here at ABC understand that it is better to upgrade extensibly than to upgrade extensibly. Imagine a combination of OWL and J++. Our technology takes the best aspects of J++ and XML. What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our solutions but our capacity to matrix. A company that can benchmark defiantly will (eventually) be able to utilize elegantly. Quick: do you have a client-focused plan for coping with new interfaces? What does it really mean to synergize "proactively"? Imagine a combination of PNG and Unix. We believe we know that it is better to maximize perfectly than to recontextualize seamlessly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof operation. We will visualize the jargon-based industry jargon "subscriber-defined".