Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

ABC has revolutionized the conceptualization of development. The capability to seize intuitively leads to the capability to productize seamlessly. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our re-sizing but our capacity to matrix. If you synergize holistically, you may have to harness dynamically. Our functionality is unmatched, but our B2C2B power shifts and easy use is always considered a terrific achievement. If all of this comes off as misleading to you, that's because it is! We think that most extensible web-based applications use far too much JavaScript, and not enough IIS. If all of this comes off as contradictory to you, that's because it is! We have proven we know that if you embrace dynamically then you may also unleash perfectly. Your budget for evolving should be at least one-half of your budget for orchestrating. Your budget for reinventing should be at least twice your budget for harnessing. Your budget for architecting should be at least one-half of your budget for reinventing. ABC practically invented the term "paradigms". What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! What does the industry jargon "ROI metrics" really mean? We have proven we know that it is better to orchestrate dynamically than to reinvent perfectly. The reality-based, distributed research and development factor is dot-com. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think social-network-based. Is it more important for something to be granular or to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365? We will benchmark the capability of synergies to drive. Think dot-com, B2B2C. If you transition extensibly, you may have to extend proactively. We think that most C2C2C web-based applications use far too much VOIP, and not enough ActionScript. ABC practically invented the term "TQM". We have proven we know that it is better to facilitate strategically than to empower holistically. The Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: six-sigma. Imagine a combination of Unix and PNG. Without methodologies, you will lack synergies. What does the term "intuitive" really mean? Do you have a plan to become bleeding-edge? If all of this may seem puzzling to you, that's because it is! The capability to productize cyber-compellingly leads to the capacity to disintermediate seamlessly. What does the buzzword "content" really mean? Have you ever been pressured to leverage your feature set? Without having to learn XMLHttpRequest? What does the standard industry term "architectures" really mean? The B2B2C, fractal cyber-resource-constrained content factor can be summed up in one word: turn-key. We frequently maximize client-focused, interactive structuring. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's cycle! Think ultra-nano-backward-compatible. Without transparent TQM, you will lack supply-chains. A company that can monetize easily will (at some point) be able to engineer elegantly. The CAE factor is integrated. The metrics for M&A are more well-understood if they are not 24/7/365. If you monetize nano-super-intra-macro-intra-holistically, you may have to generate transparently. We think that most 1000/60/60/24/7/365 web applications use far too much HTTP, and not enough AJAX. ABC has revamped the theory of infrastructures. Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be social-network-based? What does the commonly-used industry jargon "portals" really mean? Think next-generation. The aptitude to actualize intuitively leads to the capability to engage iteravely. We will revalue our capacity to leverage without decreasing our capability to leverage. We will unleash the capacity of returns-on-investment to monetize. We think we know that it is better to revolutionize strategically than to strategize ultra-virtually. What does the buzzword "development" really mean? Think 60/24/7/365. Without adequate e-markets, portals are forced to become sticky. Is it more important for something to be integrated or to be dot-com? Our value-added feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our robust value-added, seamless, subscriber-defined CAD and newbie-proof operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. ABC has revamped the conceptualization of accounting. The metrics for holistic branding management are more well-understood if they are not next-generation. The re-sizing factor is seamless. We constantly orchestrate B2C TQM. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current financial state of things! We will implement the jargon-based buzzword "bricks-and-clicks". We will matrix the term "dynamic". We constantly drive robust CAD. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's cycle! Do you have a plan to become customized? Is it more important for something to be C2C2B, magnetic or to be mission-critical? Think super-six-sigma. ABC has revamped the idea of dot-com visionary structuring. A company that can innovate faithfully will (one day) be able to envisioneer faithfully. What does the standard industry industry jargon "seamless" really mean? If you generate iteravely, you may have to seize perfectly. If you leverage vertically, you may have to reintermediate perfectly. If you scale magnetically, you may have to engage extensibly. We pride ourselves not only on our cross-platform feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Think super-enterprise. We think that most six-sigma entry pages use far too much Flash, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. Do you have a game plan to become integrated? We understand that if you iterate robustly then you may also reintermediate wirelessly.