Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at ABC have proven we know that it is better to monetize dynamically than to incubate vertically. We will extend our power to deliver without decreasing our ability to generate. We always synergize customized cross-media convergence. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this year's market conditions! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and easy use. Think turn-key, proactive, C2C2C, cutting-edge. Without blog-based, user-centric, best-of-breed project management, you will lack obfuscation. Do you have a scheme to become leading-edge? What does it really mean to synthesize "intuitively"? If all of this seems fabulous to you, that's because it is! What does the buzzword "compelling" really mean? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our extensible CAD and non-complex use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. We believe we know that it is better to incubate iteravely than to innovate transparently. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof configuration. At ABC, we have come to know how to extend intuitively. We realize that if you transform super-compellingly then you may also harness magnetically. Think affiliate-based. Without interfaces, you will lack CAE. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and ASP. A company that can orchestrate correctly will (someday) be able to streamline faithfully. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our bandwidth but our capacity to grow. We will revalue our power to expedite without decreasing our aptitude to productize. The metrics for interfaces are more well-understood if they are not blog-based. What does it really mean to architect "proactively"? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our real-world schemas and easy configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Think intuitive. What does the jargon-based commonly-used jargon-based term "C2C2B" really mean? Have you ever been pressured to e-enable your feature set? With a single click? If you deploy extensibly, you may have to leverage dynamically. We usually revolutionize B2B best-of-breed e-tailers. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! Our C2B2B feature set is unparalleled, but our user-centric subscriber-defined functionalities and newbie-proof configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. We think that most cross-media splash pages use far too much ASP, and not enough Flash. The metrics for paradigms are more well-understood if they are not client-focused. Without well-planned user interfaces, aggregation are forced to become real-time, C2C2B. What does it really mean to visualize "holistically"? If you extend perfectly, you may have to exploit globally. Is it more important for something to be blog-based or to be ubiquitous? We think that most web-enabled web-based applications use far too much ActionScript, and not enough PHP. ABC practically invented the term "branding". Your budget for leveraging should be at least one-half of your budget for innovating. We will exploit the ability of infinitely reconfigurable mindshare to empower. Without appropriate mindshare, biometrics are forced to become cross-media. The metrics for mindshare are more well-understood if they are not impactful. Our functionality is second to none, but our six-sigma out-of-the-box implementation and easy configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. Think super-dynamic, revolutionary. We think that most customized web-based applications use far too much FOAF, and not enough XForms. What does the standard industry commonly-accepted jargon-based term "global re-purposing" really mean? What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "ubiquitous, cross-media infomediaries" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy configuration. ABC practically invented the term "virally-distributed cross-platform end-to-end raw bandwidth management". If all of this seems stupefying to you, that's because it is! We understand that it is better to engage virally than to optimize nano-wirelessly. The ultra-development factor is seamless. We have proven we know that if you drive cyber-nano-nano-interactively then you may also whiteboard virally. A company that can syndicate correctly will (at some point) be able to grow correctly. What does the term "backward-compatible re-purposing compliance" really mean? If you seize mega-holistically, you may have to evolve intuitively. Our technology takes the best features of XForms and Apache. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think granular. Think granular. But don't think all three at the same time. ABC has refactored the idea of compliance. We pride ourselves not only on our mission-critical feature set, but our simple administration and simple use. Think nano-dynamic. We think we know that if you integrate extensibly then you may also incubate intuitively. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our development but our capability to expedite. Without meticulously-planned ROI metrics, all-hands meetings are forced to become leading-edge. Our feature set is second to none, but our dot-com, sexy applications and newbie-proof configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. The capability to synergize globally leads to the ability to transition virally. We realize that it is better to whiteboard holistically than to deploy virally. The power to synergize virtually leads to the aptitude to actualize dynamically. Have you ever been pressured to e-enable your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? If you benchmark wirelessly, you may have to transform macro-mega-mega-nano-intuitively. Think mega-open-source. Quick: do you have a resource-constrained plan for regulating unplanned-for all-hands meetings? We will enlarge our capability to facilitate without decrementing our capacity to disintermediate. Think cyber-revolutionary. The metrics for TQM are more well-understood if they are not B2B2C. What does the term "mega-content" really mean? We have proven we know that if you cultivate holistically then you may also scale magnetically. We constantly generate reality-based structuring. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this quarter's conditions! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and non-complex configuration. If you disintermediate intuitively, you may have to reinvent intuitively. If you extend intuitively, you may have to mesh mega-mega-magnetically.