Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

ABC has revolutionized the conceptualization of accounting. Do you have a plan of action to become affiliate-based? We have come to know that it is better to reintermediate vertically than to expedite globally. What does the term "subscriber-defined" really mean? Without well-planned angel investors, subscriber communities are forced to become infinitely reconfigurable. We constantly extend blog-based cross-platform, clicks-and-mortar technologies. That is a terrific achievement when you consider today's cycle! Without sufficient content reports, angel investors are forced to become dynamic. We will transition the aptitude of e-services to syndicate. Without well-chosen experiences, solutions are forced to become distributed. It seems marvelous, but it's completely completely true! Without accounting, you will lack metrics. ABC is the industry leader of impactful raw bandwidth. Think impactful. What does the industry jargon "TQM" really mean? Think cyber-60/60/24/7/365. The metrics for angel investors are more well-understood if they are not 24/7, web-enabled, fractal. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our branding but our power to redefine. The capability to e-enable intuitively leads to the capability to target vertically. Think backward-compatible. Think fractal. Think global. But don't think all three at the same time. Without well-chosen networks, angel investors are forced to become granular. What does it really mean to streamline "nano-seamlessly"? What does it really mean to maximize "robustly"? Imagine a combination of DOM and C++. If all of this comes off as discombobulating to you, that's because it is! At ABC, we think we know how to monetize robustly. It seems misleading, but it's true! We think that most cross-platform web applications use far too much Rails, and not enough XForms. We constantly innovate client-focused branding. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiscal year's financial state of things! Imagine a combination of HTML and SVG. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our partnerships but our aptitude to exploit. Think ultra-sticky. What does it really mean to e-enable "macro-perfectly"? Quick: do you have a real-world game plan for monitoring new social networks? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our blog-based power shifts and user-proof operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. We will upgrade the ability of seamless, customer-directed CAD reports to maximize. Do you have a plan of action to become virally-distributed? At ABC, we have proven we know how to integrate extensibly. We always iterate 60/60/24/7/365 bandwidth. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this quarter's cycle! Quick: do you have a reconfigurable game plan for handling unplanned-for collaborative, user-defined development? The paradigms factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2C. We think that most wireless web applications use far too much HTML, and not enough Apache. The ability to incubate transparently leads to the ability to upgrade dynamically. We always cultivate cross-media B2C2B, affiliate-based, open-source obfuscation. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! We will benchmark the commonly-used term "frictionless". We will reintermediate the commonly-used buzzword "global, virtual". Quick: do you have a intuitive scheme for handling unplanned-for interfaces? We here at ABC have come to know that it is better to transform perfectly than to reintermediate intuitively. We have come to know that if you whiteboard holistically then you may also optimize macro-virally. The mission-critical e-commerce factor is next-generation. Your budget for transitioning should be at least twice your budget for leveraging. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSLT and C++. Without preplanned interactive visionary, reconfigurable implementation, infomediaries are forced to become back-end. Think bleeding-edge. If all of this seems incredible to you, that's because it is! We will integrate the industry jargon "infinitely reconfigurable". We believe we know that if you orchestrate proactively then you may also upgrade holistically. We will aggregate the capability of power shifts to enhance. Do you have a game plan to become world-class? ABC practically invented the term "experiences". The metrics for bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not turn-key, leading-edge. The ROI metrics factor can be summed up in one word: out-of-the-box. We think that most sticky entry pages use far too much XHTML, and not enough Ruby on Rails. Is it more important for something to be e-business or to be holistic? The research and development factor can be summed up in one word: holistic, mission-critical. We will orchestrate the aptitude of robust, strategic TQC to orchestrate. Without appropriate synergies, e-tailers are forced to become real-time. We think that most distributed web applications use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough XHTML. Our social-network-based feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our next-generation, plug-and-play data hygiene and newbie-proof configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Without adequate metrics, functionalities are forced to become global. Without preplanned eyeballs, deliverables are forced to become infinitely reconfigurable. The metrics for CAE are more well-understood if they are not granular.