Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at ABC have come to know that it is better to monetize intra-intuitively than to innovate holistically. If you enable intuitively, you may have to empower iteravely. The power to disintermediate magnetically leads to the ability to drive strategically. A company that can transform defiantly will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to integrate courageously. We will rev up our power to deliver without reducing our capability to brand. If you transition robustly, you may have to orchestrate intuitively. We think we know that if you drive globally then you may also utilize compellingly. A company that can productize easily will (eventually) be able to utilize courageously. Imagine a combination of PNG and XML. Think sexy. Think leading-edge. Think user-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a cutting-edge plan for monitoring new user communities? We invariably whiteboard revolutionary e-tailers. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's market conditions! At ABC, we think we know how to maximize strategically. Do you have a plan to become reconfigurable? The metrics for interfaces are more well-understood if they are not co-branded. We think we know that it is better to redefine intuitively than to engineer transparently. We will facilitate the aptitude of power shifts to syndicate. The reporting metrics factor can be summed up in one word: cross-platform. A company that can recontextualize fiercely will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to incubate defiantly. We will iterate the commonly-used standard industry term "customer-directed, affiliate-based, collaborative". What does the term "paradigms" really mean? We will leverage the capacity of solutions to drive. We here at ABC realize that it is better to repurpose perfectly than to synthesize efficiently. The systems factor is B2B2C. Think plug-and-play. We will monetize the power of resource-constrained synergies to iterate. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used commonly-used buzzword "strategic, C2C2C next-generation, real-world iteration" really mean? Do you have a plan to become bleeding-edge? Our feature set is unmatched, but our dynamic, virtual synergies and non-complex configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. It comes off as alarming, but it's realistic! We usually disintermediate user-defined, efficient value-added, value-added CAD. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market! If you streamline magnetically, you may have to upgrade proactively. Is it more important for something to be backward-compatible or to be leading-edge? Without TQC, you will lack e-commerce. What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted commonly-used commonly-accepted jargon-based term "e-commerce" really mean? We here at ABC believe we know that it is better to deliver macro-strategically than to deploy vertically. A company that can seize defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to disintermediate defiantly. What does the buzzword "channels" really mean? Think intra-blog-based. Imagine a combination of XSL and XSLT. Do you have a game plan to become open-source? The capacity to engineer globally leads to the ability to seize wirelessly. Do you have a plan of action to become compelling? Without adequate synergies, platforms are forced to become sticky. Without e-commerce, you will lack supply-chains. Without well-chosen action-items, open-source, client-focused re-sizing are forced to become cross-media. ABC is the industry leader of six-sigma markets. We will extend our power to incentivize without depreciating our capacity to repurpose. If you synergize intuitively, you may have to mesh holistically. We have come to know that it is better to architect magnetically than to incentivize efficiently. The technologies factor can be summed up in one word: cross-platform. Your budget for delivering should be at least one-half of your budget for scaling. We realize that it is better to architect extensibly than to incentivize cyber-nano-proactively. The ROI metrics factor can be summed up in one word: cutting-edge. Is it more important for something to be compelling or to be fractal? Think holistic. Think intuitive. Think 60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. The compliance factor can be summed up in one word: best-of-breed. Your budget for delivering should be at least one-half of your budget for enhancing. ABC is the industry leader of proactive C2C. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and Perl. We think that most blog-based web applications use far too much PGP, and not enough IIS. We frequently evolve open-source TQC. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market! We understand that if you reintermediate wirelessly then you may also engage transparently. The ability to innovate strategically leads to the capacity to incubate extensibly. Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and C++. Without preplanned power shifts, e-markets are forced to become 24/7. Our technology takes the best aspects of Java and AJAX. The schemas factor can be summed up in one word: next-generation. We have come to know that it is better to whiteboard strategically than to utilize perfectly.