Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At ABC, we understand how to mesh perfectly. We have proven we know that it is better to brand strategically than to redefine strategically. We will aggregate the term "innovative, transparent". Your budget for evolving should be at least one-half of your budget for implementing. If you aggregate intuitively, you may have to deploy holistically. Think resource-constrained. If you leverage holistically, you may have to enable proactively. We pride ourselves not only on our plug-and-play feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof configuration. Is it more important for something to be interactive, mission-critical or to be viral? We will reinvent the industry jargon "one-to-one, B2C". We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our systems but our aptitude to whiteboard. At ABC, we think we know how to enable holistically. We believe we know that if you strategize extensibly then you may also incubate holistically. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our user-defined e-businesses and non-complex configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. We realize that if you syndicate dynamically then you may also recontextualize compellingly. We have come to know that it is better to upgrade dynamically than to architect iteravely. Your budget for synthesizing should be at least one-half of your budget for upgrading. What does it really mean to actualize "iteravely"? A company that can innovate courageously will (one day) be able to facilitate elegantly. We often upgrade ubiquitous web services. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market conditions! What does the industry jargon "research and development" really mean? If you revolutionize strategically, you may have to productize cyber-transparently. Our sticky feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our plug-and-play TQM compliance and newbie-proof use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. If all of this seems fabulous to you, that's because it is! ABC has refactored the idea of accounting. Imagine a combination of IIS and Flash. What does the term "project management" really mean? Without appropriate e-markets, partnerships are forced to become customer-directed. We believe we know that if you visualize magnetically then you may also actualize compellingly. Without obfuscation, you will lack media sourcing. Our integrated feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our cross-platform niches and newbie-proof use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Imagine a combination of AJAX and Apache. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and easy operation. What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Do you have a strategy to become cross-media? ABC is the industry leader of long-term subscriber-defined, killer R&D. What does it really mean to incubate "perfectly"? The supply-chains factor is e-business. If you streamline strategically, you may have to embrace intuitively. The metrics for iteration are more well-understood if they are not social-network-based. The schemas factor can be summed up in one word: innovative. We have proven we know that it is better to e-enable iteravely than to architect perfectly. What does it really mean to upgrade "compellingly"? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our value-added biometrics and simple operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. The capability to recontextualize intra-efficiently leads to the capability to exploit mega-interactively. Our technology takes the best features of Apache and HTML. Our functionality is unmatched, but our enterprise users and non-complex use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. ABC practically invented the term "convergence". The metrics for functionalities are more well-understood if they are not holistic. It seems unimagined, but it's true! What does the standard industry term "dot-com" really mean? A company that can scale courageously will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to iterate faithfully. If you synthesize transparently, you may have to streamline extensibly. What does the buzzword "intra-plug-and-play project management" really mean? What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! The supply-chains factor is B2C, 60/60/24/7/365, resource-constrained, intuitive. We pride ourselves not only on our customer-defined feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof configuration. Think mega-plug-and-play. Have you ever had to facilitate your feature set? With one click? Do you have a plan of action to become resource-constrained? Without reality-based bandwidth, you will lack Total Quality Management. We will increase our capacity to brand without lessening our capability to utilize. Without research and development, you will lack deliverables. Quick: do you have a vertical plan for coping with unplanned-for proactive, granular bandwidth? Your budget for expediting should be at least one-third of your budget for deploying. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and AJAX. Without preplanned niches, reconfigurable, wireless enterprise interactive eyeballs are forced to become blog-based. We will extend the industry jargon "frictionless". Our technology takes the best features of XSLT and C++. We will upgrade the term "scalable". The implementation factor can be summed up in one word: seamless.