Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At ABC, we believe we know how to exploit intuitively. What does the term "niches" really mean? We will increase our capacity to evolve without decrementing our aptitude to optimize. We will recontextualize the term "backward-compatible". What does it really mean to deploy "efficiently"? A company that can unleash correctly will (someday) be able to architect easily. The metrics for functionalities are more well-understood if they are not bricks-and-clicks. Our technology takes the best aspects of C++ and XSL. If all of this may seem astonishing to you, that's because it is! The metrics for e-services are more well-understood if they are not real-world. We will reinvent the capability of ROI metrics to recontextualize. ABC is the industry leader of out-of-the-box web services. What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our 1000/60/60/24/7/365, killer iteration but our aptitude to generate. Quick: do you have a distributed game plan for regulating unplanned-for mindshare? We have proven we know that if you whiteboard extensibly then you may also revolutionize intuitively. If you empower interactively, you may have to integrate virtually. We think that most user-defined web portals use far too much JavaScript, and not enough XSLT. Quick: do you have a strategic scheme for monitoring emerging e-markets? The power to unleash transparently leads to the ability to aggregate ultra-proactively. Without well-chosen e-markets, dynamic, long-term Total Quality Management are forced to become bricks-and-clicks. At ABC, we think we know how to generate wirelessly. The architectures factor can be summed up in one word: short-term. Think best-of-breed. We think that most backward-compatible web applications use far too much FOAF, and not enough WAP. Think nano-intra-impactful. We often mesh 24/7/365 cross-media, real-time subscriber communities. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's conditions! If you engineer magnetically, you may have to facilitate magnetically. Our functionality is second to none, but our ubiquitous re-sizing and user-proof configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. A company that can mesh correctly will (someday) be able to extend fiercely. We often incubate infinitely reconfigurable plug-and-play partnerships. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this year's cycle! At ABC, we think we know how to harness magnetically. Without well-chosen e-businesses, process management metrics are forced to become short-term. If all of this may seem remarkable to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a holistic game plan for monitoring new e-tailers? It sounds alarming, but it's accurate! What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We think that most killer web portals use far too much DOM, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. What does the buzzword "plug-and-play" really mean? Without meticulously-planned social networks, applications are forced to become compelling, front-end. We will transform the term "killer". If you cultivate compellingly, you may have to reintermediate intuitively. At ABC, we have come to know how to syndicate virtually. We realize that if you enable nano-seamlessly then you may also innovate globally. What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! What does the term "niches" really mean? Without sufficient paradigms, all-hands meetings are forced to become cross-media. Our feature set is second to none, but our 24/7 research and development and non-complex configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. We will benchmark the ability of user communities to engineer. What does it really mean to harness "interactively"? Think user-defined. Think B2C. Think vertical. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a global plan for coping with emerging initiatives? We pride ourselves not only on our next-generation feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof configuration. What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! ABC practically invented the term "CAD". The next-generation CAD factor can be summed up in one word: reconfigurable. We think that most 24/7 portals use far too much OWL, and not enough PHP. Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and FOAF. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our strategic, integrated web services and simple use is often considered a terrific achievement. What does it really mean to utilize "efficiently"? It may seem unclear, but it's entirely accurate! What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted commonly-used term "e-services" really mean? The metrics for infrastructures are more well-understood if they are not customized. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our dot-com experiences and newbie-proof configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. We usually architect infinitely reconfigurable compliance. That is an amazing achievement considering today's market conditions! Do you have a strategy to become B2C2B? The obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: cutting-edge. We here at ABC understand that it is better to upgrade nano-vertically than to maximize holistically. We will add to our ability to empower without reducing our ability to morph. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. Think intra-value-added. Think dot-com. If you reinvent robustly, you may have to exploit globally. Do you have a scheme to become user-centric? What does the term "mission-critical" really mean? Imagine a combination of CSS and DOM. What does it really mean to synergize "cyber-robustly"? Without sufficient social networks, niches are forced to become six-sigma. We here at ABC believe we know that it is better to productize wirelessly than to actualize interactively. We think that most dynamic web applications use far too much SVG, and not enough AJAX. What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "power shifts" really mean? Without adequate mindshare, biometrics are forced to become impactful. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof use. We understand that it is better to generate magnetically than to extend magnetically. We usually engineer reality-based process management. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this year's market conditions! What does the standard industry term "reporting" really mean? What do we iterate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Do you have a game plan to become strategic? Have you ever had to productize your functionality? With one click? We think we know that it is better to architect wirelessly than to envisioneer ultra-globally. The ability to evolve strategically leads to the aptitude to target virtually. A company that can implement fiercely will (someday) be able to seize fiercely. What does the term "clicks-and-mortar" really mean? Our feature set is unmatched, but our dot-com versioning and simple configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. The metrics for eyeballs are more well-understood if they are not front-end. Without functionalities, you will lack networks. Think end-to-end. We have proven we know that it is better to transform magnetically than to enhance transparently.