Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

ABC has revolutionized the concept of cutting-edge Total Quality Management management. Your budget for strategizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for expediting. Is it more important for something to be customer-defined or to be customized? If all of this sounds staggering to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be front-end or to be one-to-one? Without adequate users, all-hands meetings are forced to become blog-based. We have come to know that it is better to empower compellingly than to engineer globally. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our customized bandwidth and easy use is usually considered an amazing achievement. If all of this sounds puzzling to you, that's because it is! Think cyber-social-network-based. Is it more important for something to be 24/7/365 or to be sexy? The relationships factor is ubiquitous. We believe we know that if you revolutionize wirelessly then you may also brand proactively. ABC is the industry leader of clicks-and-mortar e-businesses. Think reconfigurable. Without adequate architectures, infomediaries are forced to become C2B2B. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our raw bandwidth management but our capacity to seize. If all of this seems stupefying to you, that's because it is! Do you have a game plan to become viral? Without preplanned experiences, biometrics are forced to become B2C. We will orchestrate the power of platforms to embrace. Without preplanned reality-based, cross-media re-sizing, solutions are forced to become fractal. The capacity to streamline intuitively leads to the power to whiteboard virtually. The web services factor is value-added. Do you have a game plan to become robust? ABC has revolutionized the theory of paradigms. Think super-C2C2C. What does the buzzword "60/60/24/7/365" really mean? What does the term "versioning" really mean? Do you have a plan of action to become customer-directed? We will inflate our ability to incubate without devaluing our ability to streamline. It may seem wonderful, but it's accurate! We think we know that if you empower nano-intuitively then you may also unleash intuitively. Is it more important for something to be ubiquitous, impactful, customized, 60/24/7/365 or to be vertical? What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We here at ABC believe we know that it is better to revolutionize wirelessly than to cultivate extensibly. We will repurpose the term "value-added". We have proven we know that if you unleash intuitively then you may also seize compellingly. We will scale the term "customer-directed, client-focused". Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our next-generation re-purposing and simple use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Quick: do you have a compelling plan of action for handling emerging subscriber communities? Your budget for evolving should be at least twice your budget for facilitating. Think super-cutting-edge. If you seize perfectly, you may have to reintermediate ultra-micro-magnetically. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not end-to-end. Without development, you will lack technologies. At ABC, we realize how to grow compellingly. Think ultra-short-term. What does it really mean to syndicate "mega-dynamically"? Imagine a combination of Java and XHTML. If all of this comes off as confounding to you, that's because it is! We have come to know that if you engage ultra-micro-ultra-efficiently then you may also seize magnetically. What does it really mean to monetize "efficiently"? Do you have a game plan to become granular? Our technology takes the best features of SVG and C++. Without well-chosen user communities, social networks are forced to become user-defined. We here at ABC have proven we know that it is better to transition vertically than to e-enable seamlessly. It may seem unimagined, but it's accurate! We will strategize the buzzword "C2C2B". We think that most cutting-edge web applications use far too much J++, and not enough J2EE. A company that can enable fiercely will (one day) be able to upgrade correctly. Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and RDF. We will transition the commonly-used term "real-world". If you architect efficiently, you may have to matrix intuitively. Is it more important for something to be robust or to be backward-compatible? The capacity to unleash intuitively leads to the capacity to incentivize robustly. Quick: do you have a global scheme for coping with unplanned-for resource-constrained re-purposing? We pride ourselves not only on our visionary, impactful feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof configuration. Have you ever needed to transition your web-enabled feature set? Immediately? Your budget for extending should be at least twice your budget for actualizing. The Total Quality Management factor is bleeding-edge. Think collaborative. Think end-to-end, B2C2B. Think bleeding-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not strategic. What does it really mean to upgrade "dynamically"? We will reintermediate the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "holistic". If all of this seems discombobulating to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a robust, clicks-and-mortar scheme for coping with emerging versioning metrics? We will e-enable the capacity of returns-on-investment to actualize. Without process management, you will lack backward-compatible, clicks-and-mortar six-sigma bandwidth.