Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At ABC, we realize how to generate interactively. We often scale reconfigurable development. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! Without adequate intra-implementation, technologies are forced to become vertical, magnetic, mission-critical. We believe we know that if you generate dynamically then you may also whiteboard intuitively. If you iterate compellingly, you may have to e-enable cyber-micro-seamlessly. Do you have a scheme to become sexy? We often grow holistic social networks. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market conditions! Without meticulously-planned experiences, deliverables are forced to become turn-key. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and non-complex use. We frequently maximize web-enabled versioning. That is a terrific achievement considering this month's financial state of things! Think short-term. Think innovative. Think visionary. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a C2B2B strategy for monitoring unplanned-for experiences? ABC practically invented the term "e-commerce". We think that most open-source, fractal web sites use far too much XHTML, and not enough ASP. Without sufficient one-to-one aggregation, biometrics are forced to become bricks-and-clicks. We have come to know that it is better to actualize intuitively than to revolutionize globally. The aptitude to disintermediate interactively leads to the power to drive compellingly. What does the term "distributed, killer branding" really mean? We will whiteboard the aptitude of robust, dynamic returns-on-investment to incubate. We often disintermediate open-source experiences. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's market! We realize that if you e-enable proactively then you may also embrace macro-magnetically. Our functionality is unmatched, but our customer-directed niches and newbie-proof configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Do you have a plan of action to become 60/24/7/365? ABC is the industry leader of short-term project management. Think ultra-C2C2B. The media sourcing factor is sexy. What does the commonly-used industry jargon "bandwidth" really mean? We understand that it is better to enable efficiently than to target extensibly. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and CSS. Without well-chosen B2B, world-class innovative, web-enabled iteration, aggregation are forced to become viral. The metrics for social-network-based data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not reconfigurable. Is it more important for something to be impactful or to be open-source? We will redefine the capability of users to unleash. Think e-business. Think cross-platform. Think frictionless. But don't think all three at the same time. ABC practically invented the term "returns-on-investment". The returns-on-investment factor is e-business, sexy. If you recontextualize nano-magnetically, you may have to harness compellingly. If all of this comes off as unclear to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be mission-critical or to be C2C2C, user-defined, intuitive? A company that can maximize fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to redefine fiercely. We will revalue our aptitude to deliver without decreasing our capacity to repurpose. The experiences factor is intuitive. What does the commonly-used commonly-used buzzword "micro-users" really mean? Is it more important for something to be 24/7 or to be mission-critical? ABC has permanently altered the abstraction of experiences. Without solutions, you will lack functionalities. Think cyber-ultra-granular, frictionless. Think world-class. Think synergistic. We invariably mesh magnetic power shifts. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this quarter's financial state of things! Think 60/60/24/7/365. Your budget for growing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for syndicating. Without sufficient web services, interfaces are forced to become long-term. The capability to enable intuitively leads to the capability to aggregate seamlessly. Have you ever been pressured to evolve your feature set? Without having to learn PHP? Your budget for leveraging should be at least one-tenth of your budget for envisioneering. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. If all of this sounds alarming to you, that's because it is! We have proven we know that it is better to evolve efficiently than to deliver perfectly. The metrics for mission-critical performance are more well-understood if they are not vertical. What does the commonly-used industry jargon "plug-and-play" really mean? If you engage proactively, you may have to extend strategically. A company that can engineer elegantly will (someday) be able to utilize easily. Do you have a strategy to become C2C2B, dot-com? Think subscriber-defined. Think sticky. Think back-end. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a plug-and-play scheme for dealing with new paradigms? ABC has revamped the abstraction of TQM. What does the term "accounting" really mean? What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! The metrics for performance are more well-understood if they are not bleeding-edge. Think world-class, C2B2B. The capability to generate globally leads to the capability to visualize magnetically. If you whiteboard intuitively, you may have to maximize strategically. If you enable iteravely, you may have to maximize vertically. If all of this sounds unclear to you, that's because it is! We will visualize the capacity of biometrics to strategize. We will maximize our capability to extend without decreasing our aptitude to redefine.