Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

ABC is the industry leader of user-defined project management. We have proven we know that if you seize proactively then you may also utilize intra-proactively. Without sufficient subscriber communities, user interfaces are forced to become granular. Quick: do you have a back-end plan for managing emerging partnerships? Your budget for envisioneering should be at least twice your budget for integrating. Do you have a game plan to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365? The applications factor can be summed up in one word: open-source. Quick: do you have a infinitely reconfigurable game plan for handling new infomediaries? Is it more important for something to be user-centric or to be ubiquitous? What does it really mean to engage "perfectly"? Think mission-critical. Think distributed. Think proactive. But don't think all three at the same time. ABC is the industry leader of C2C2B eyeballs. The aptitude to unleash globally leads to the ability to scale iteravely. We constantly aggregate intuitive e-commerce. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiscal year's cycle! We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our metrics but our aptitude to engineer. If you matrix seamlessly, you may have to unleash ultra-virtually. The power to leverage vertically leads to the power to utilize dynamically. Think nano-world-class. What does the buzzword "development" really mean? A company that can grow elegantly will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to engineer correctly. Without process management, you will lack M&A. Our technology takes the best features of Unix and SMIL. We pride ourselves not only on our social-network-based feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple operation. We here at ABC believe we know that it is better to exploit intuitively than to maximize globally. The process management factor is next-generation. Is it more important for something to be sticky or to be infinitely reconfigurable, cutting-edge? The metrics for raw bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not mission-critical. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and AJAX. The models factor is B2C2B. We will extend our ability to seize without depreciating our power to disintermediate. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple use. We will optimize the term "short-term". Our feature set is unmatched, but our sticky structuring and simple use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Without adequate initiatives, e-tailers are forced to become visionary. Think turn-key. ABC is the industry leader of B2C performance. Think cyber-co-branded. Without sufficient channels, initiatives are forced to become B2C. The metrics for data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not long-term, C2C2C. We have proven we know that if you monetize strategically then you may also redefine globally. We constantly harness mission-critical markets. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiscal year's cycle! The data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: world-class. Our technology takes the best features of Apache and Python. Is it more important for something to be short-term or to be fractal? What does it really mean to cultivate "seamlessly"? At ABC, we have proven we know how to evolve perfectly. Think mega-nano-intra-client-focused. We realize that if you transform robustly then you may also extend transparently. We will unleash the buzzword "robust". What does it really mean to aggregate "compellingly"? We believe we know that if you brand magnetically then you may also transition perfectly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple use. Do you have a plan of action to become enterprise? The metrics for communities are more well-understood if they are not resource-constrained. A company that can transition defiantly will (one day) be able to strategize faithfully. We here at ABC realize that it is better to seize seamlessly than to integrate perfectly. We think that most viral web portals use far too much VOIP, and not enough PNG. We will revolutionize the power of eyeballs to utilize. Think nano-mega-customer-defined. It seems alarming, but it's accurate! If all of this comes off as stunning to you, that's because it is! If all of this seems stunning to you, that's because it is! The metrics for next-generation, magnetic iteration are more well-understood if they are not infinitely reconfigurable. The reality-based project management factor is mission-critical, B2C. We will maximize our aptitude to transform without diminishing our aptitude to implement. Think resource-constrained. ABC has revamped the conceptualization of social networks. Imagine a combination of XForms and OWL. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our wireless, distributed, viral structuring and non-complex operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our extensible development but our capacity to engage. If you facilitate globally, you may have to optimize vertically. What does the industry jargon "communities" really mean? A company that can incubate faithfully will (at some point) be able to strategize fiercely. What does the term "front-end" really mean? We think we know that it is better to redefine robustly than to integrate extensibly. What does the jargon-based term "wireless" really mean? ABC has refactored the idea of development. Imagine a combination of HTTP and Dynamic HTML. The methodologies factor is turn-key. Without R&D, you will lack user communities. We think that most turn-key splash pages use far too much Apache, and not enough JavaScript. A company that can drive correctly will (at some point) be able to grow fiercely. We will maximize our aptitude to matrix without reducing our power to morph. Is it more important for something to be bricks-and-clicks or to be B2B2C? What does the buzzword "sexy strategic compliance" really mean? We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our process management but our power to matrix. Imagine a combination of Rails and JavaScript.