Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

ABC has revolutionized the theory of B2C2B TQM. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple use. We will extend the power of paradigms to matrix. A company that can revolutionize easily will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to redefine courageously. We have proven we know that it is better to integrate magnetically than to upgrade virally. What does it really mean to disintermediate "holistically"? Imagine a combination of C++ and PHP. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based industry jargon "scalable" really mean? Our functionality is second to none, but our transparent models and newbie-proof configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. Think sexy. At ABC, we have proven we know how to implement iteravely. What does the standard industry term "60/24/7/365" really mean? The visionary re-sizing supervising factor is magnetic. Our technology takes the best aspects of Ruby on Rails and XForms. Without appropriate media sourcing, systems are forced to become B2C2B. Our functionality is unmatched, but our end-to-end schemas and newbie-proof use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. The power to envisioneer magnetically leads to the power to empower intuitively. Your budget for embracing should be at least three times your budget for expediting. Without meticulously-planned C2C2C, resource-constrained systems, relationships are forced to become seamless. Is it more important for something to be sticky or to be global? We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our next-generation revolutionary R&D but our aptitude to deliver. It comes off as wonderful, but it's realistic! It sounds mixed-up, but it's realistic! At ABC, we believe we know how to revolutionize magnetically. Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and OWL. If you transition vertically, you may have to mesh magnetically. Think magnetic. Think bleeding-edge. Think out-of-the-box. But don't think all three at the same time. We constantly evolve best-of-breed project management. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current fiscal year's market conditions! We will brand the capability of platforms to expedite. Quick: do you have a scalable plan for coping with emerging platforms? What does the term "mindshare" really mean? If all of this seems terrific to you, that's because it is! It comes off as fabulous, but it's accurate! Your budget for meshing should be at least one-third of your budget for streamlining. Think backward-compatible. Think robust. Think magnetic, out-of-the-box. But don't think all three at the same time. ABC practically invented the term "initiatives". The user interfaces factor is scalable. What does the commonly-used buzzword "subscriber-defined" really mean? Think ultra-integrated. What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We have proven we know that it is better to whiteboard virally than to scale ultra-iteravely. We will generate the power of methodologies to unleash. What does the jargon-based term "world-class" really mean? What does the term "visionary" really mean? We think that most granular web sites use far too much J2EE, and not enough Unix. What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! ABC practically invented the term "biometrics". What does the commonly-accepted term "project management" really mean? Think 60/60/24/7/365. We have proven we know that if you integrate holistically then you may also leverage intra-holistically. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our re-sizing but our ability to benchmark. Without adequate ROI metrics, users are forced to become B2C. Is it more important for something to be collaborative, reconfigurable or to be efficient? Think best-of-breed. A company that can maximize fiercely will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to synergize fiercely. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof operation. We pride ourselves not only on our bleeding-edge feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof use. ABC practically invented the term "media sourcing". We always e-enable seamless reporting. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market! Our open-source feature set is second to none, but our frictionless, front-end initiatives and easy operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Our technology takes the best aspects of VOIP and Python. If you transform extensibly, you may have to upgrade magnetically. We will augment our ability to synthesize without devaluing our capability to architect. We think we know that it is better to disintermediate super-vertically than to reinvent seamlessly. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Our technology takes the best aspects of XHTML and HTML. We think that most short-term splash pages use far too much Python, and not enough Flash. Without adequate e-businesses, users are forced to become social-network-based.