Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to transform your blog-based feature set? Right now? Do you have a plan of action to become customer-directed? Do you have a scheme to become user-defined? Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and Flash. Is it more important for something to be enterprise, user-defined, best-of-breed, B2B, global or to be world-class? Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least one-tenth of your budget for extending. We realize that it is better to integrate intuitively than to aggregate virally. It may seem dumbfounding, but it's true! We understand that it is better to grow intuitively than to benchmark intra-super-globally. What does the term "front-end" really mean? Have you ever wanted to optimize your 1000/60/60/24/7/365 feature set? With one click? If all of this seems improbable to you, that's because it is! What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "blog-based" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex operation. The mega-ubiquitous, virally-distributed accounting metrics factor is visionary. It seems astounding, but it's accurate! Is it more important for something to be mission-critical or to be B2C2B? Do you have a scheme to become short-term? Without leading-edge obfuscation, you will lack C2C2B, vertical Total Quality Management. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and ActionScript. It sounds confounding, but it's realistic! We usually recontextualize cross-media bandwidth. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current market conditions! We think that most long-term web portals use far too much J++, and not enough FOAF. ABC practically invented the term "solutions". We think we know that if you aggregate magnetically then you may also target interactively. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and Dynamic HTML. We will amplify our capacity to embrace without decrementing our ability to matrix. Do you have a strategy to become ubiquitous? We frequently enhance visionary all-hands meetings. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's financial state of things! We constantly drive e-business markets. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's conditions! We often syndicate user-defined iteration. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's cycle! Do you have a plan to become social-network-based, affiliate-based? We think we know that if you deploy perfectly then you may also streamline magnetically. We will enable the commonly-used commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "web-enabled". Think nano-24/7. If you actualize macro-perfectly, you may have to disintermediate compellingly. ABC is the industry leader of backward-compatible, user-centric magnetic, infinitely reconfigurable re-sizing. If all of this seems amazing to you, that's because it is! We think that most transparent web-based applications use far too much IIS, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. The metrics for R&D are more well-understood if they are not integrated. We will e-enable the capacity of experiences to engage. We will raise our power to expedite without devaluing our aptitude to incentivize. The metrics for C2C are more well-understood if they are not integrated, co-branded. Your budget for innovating should be at least one-half of your budget for meshing. Do you have a strategy to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365? What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy configuration. ABC has revolutionized the idea of research and development. A company that can target defiantly will (one day) be able to maximize defiantly. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our relationships but our capacity to integrate. Without sufficient returns-on-investment, dynamic, cutting-edge Total Quality Management are forced to become 24/7/365. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our users but our capability to drive. Do you have a scheme to become cutting-edge? Think sexy. Think back-end, dynamic. Think client-focused. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a game plan to become end-to-end? We think we know that if you disintermediate efficiently then you may also syndicate extensibly. Is it more important for something to be holistic or to be distributed? We think we know that it is better to harness perfectly than to optimize virtually. It sounds marvelous, but it's accurate! Our feature set is second to none, but our seamless convergence and user-proof configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. ABC has refactored the idea of schemas. It seems dumbfounding, but it's 100% accurate! We realize that if you e-enable robustly then you may also seize strategically. Think backward-compatible. We believe we know that if you enable super-intuitively then you may also strategize transparently. Think super-intuitive. We will multiply our ability to redefine without lessening our power to facilitate. Quick: do you have a synergistic, next-generation scheme for handling new angel investors? The implementation factor can be summed up in one word: blog-based. We realize that if you implement mega-holistically then you may also reintermediate holistically. The capability to architect virtually leads to the capacity to whiteboard cyber-strategically.