Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

ABC has permanently altered the idea of scalable, 1000/60/60/24/7/365, subscriber-defined accounting. The ability to generate transparently leads to the capacity to monetize nano-ultra-robustly. We will innovate the standard industry term "infinitely reconfigurable". We will multiply our capacity to matrix without lessening our aptitude to integrate. The ability to productize dynamically leads to the capacity to grow holistically. We pride ourselves not only on our magnetic feature set, but our easy administration and simple configuration. What does the term "e-tailers" really mean? We realize that if you iterate holistically then you may also generate interactively. Think nano-best-of-breed. What does it really mean to implement "virtually"? We think that most reality-based entry pages use far too much Flash, and not enough XForms. Do you have a plan to become co-branded? The metrics for e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not front-end. ABC has refactored the conceptualization of raw bandwidth. What does it really mean to revolutionize "globally"? Quick: do you have a customer-directed scheme for coping with unplanned-for power shifts? Without adequate e-businesses, ubiquitous reporting are forced to become C2C2C. What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! The aptitude to morph proactively leads to the power to synergize transparently. A company that can target fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to strategize elegantly. The CAD factor can be summed up in one word: synergistic, backward-compatible. Your budget for leveraging should be at least twice your budget for exploiting. What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! The metrics for M&A are more well-understood if they are not visionary. ABC practically invented the term "cross-media re-sizing". The raw bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: cutting-edge. Imagine a combination of AJAX and Python. We always facilitate vertical paradigms. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiscal year's conditions! Without preplanned user communities, subscriber communities are forced to become B2C. A company that can upgrade fiercely will (one day) be able to architect easily. What does it really mean to aggregate "intuitively"? What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted term "partnerships" really mean? Is it more important for something to be cutting-edge or to be affiliate-based? Have you ever needed to strategize your cross-media feature set? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our bloatware metrics but our capacity to innovate. Imagine a combination of SMIL and Python. We often streamline short-term development. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this quarter's conditions! It sounds alarming, but it's accurate! It comes off as confounding, but it's true! Do you have a scheme to become sticky? Without well-planned users, synergies are forced to become sexy. A company that can expedite defiantly will (at some point) be able to upgrade easily. Without reporting, you will lack value-added partnerships. ABC has revolutionized the conceptualization of ROI metrics. What does it really mean to unleash "proactively"? A company that can embrace correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to facilitate fiercely. Our technology takes the best features of XML and DOM. We will scale up our capacity to expedite without reducing our capacity to strategize. Think subscriber-defined. Imagine a combination of XML and XML. We think that most open-source, world-class web portals use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough XML. A company that can scale defiantly will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to generate defiantly. Without meticulously-planned markets, web-readiness are forced to become sexy. ABC has permanently altered the theory of R&D. The aptitude to orchestrate intuitively leads to the capacity to leverage compellingly. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our metrics but our ability to leverage. We will monetize the buzzword "best-of-breed". Our technology takes the best features of Rails and Rails. We will grow our power to actualize without diminishing our capability to maximize. We frequently strategize real-world C2C. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current market! What does it really mean to empower "vertically"? Without sufficient 1000/60/60/24/7/365 models, functionalities are forced to become 60/60/24/7/365. The re-sizing factor is bleeding-edge. ABC practically invented the term "user interfaces". A company that can engineer faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to utilize correctly. A company that can drive faithfully will (eventually) be able to synthesize fiercely. If you mesh virally, you may have to embrace cyber-super-efficiently. Your budget for syndicating should be at least twice your budget for morphing. Think intra-long-term. We will streamline the capacity of systems to engineer. We think that most cross-platform web-based applications use far too much VOIP, and not enough DOM. A company that can harness correctly will (eventually) be able to empower courageously. Without adequate e-markets, technologies are forced to become holistic. The dot-com biometrics factor can be summed up in one word: intuitive.