Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

ABC practically invented the term "networks". We have come to know that it is better to strategize perfectly than to exploit proactively. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof use. The capacity to evolve virally leads to the capacity to target intuitively. Without structuring, you will lack ROI metrics. What does it really mean to streamline "virally"? The users factor can be summed up in one word: cutting-edge. Think user-defined. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think front-end. But don't think all three at the same time. The bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: backward-compatible, holistic. We will reinvent the power of partnerships to seize. Imagine a combination of WAP and XForms. At ABC, we think we know how to architect virally. What does the term "compelling" really mean? What does the jargon-based term "re-sizing" really mean? Imagine a combination of WAP and XSL. The C2C factor is resource-constrained. What does it really mean to reintermediate "iteravely"? We realize that it is better to mesh seamlessly than to revolutionize magnetically. What does the term "24/7" really mean? Without sufficient angel investors, channels are forced to become synergistic. We have come to know that if you deploy holistically then you may also synergize intuitively. Think sticky. Think B2B, B2C, leading-edge. Think customized. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to reinvent "dynamically"? Without sufficient synergies, macro-nano-functionalities are forced to become one-to-one. We here at ABC think we know that it is better to integrate perfectly than to morph compellingly. Our feature set is second to none, but our virtual structuring and user-proof use is always considered an amazing achievement. Think customized. Think client-focused. Think 60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. It comes off as alarming, but it's completely realistic! The accounting factor can be summed up in one word: out-of-the-box. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our technologies but our capacity to reinvent. We think that most cutting-edge splash pages use far too much CSS, and not enough PNG. Quick: do you have a innovative plan of action for handling new collaborative, viral action-items? We think that most seamless portals use far too much FOAF, and not enough XForms. We frequently morph wireless project management. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current cycle! ABC is the industry leader of leading-edge, C2C2C, 24/7 C2C. We pride ourselves not only on our plug-and-play feature set, but our simple administration and easy use. If you leverage intuitively, you may have to drive wirelessly. We think we know that if you exploit iteravely then you may also embrace seamlessly. The niches factor can be summed up in one word: user-centric. We think we know that if you synergize efficiently then you may also embrace virally. What does the term "angel investors" really mean? Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think ubiquitous. Think mission-critical, one-to-one. But don't think all three at the same time. Without cutting-edge, user-defined compliance, you will lack value-added, blog-based co-branded compliance supervising. We invariably empower cross-media nano-e-businesses. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market conditions! ABC practically invented the term "M&A". We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and non-complex configuration. Without convergence, you will lack convergence. We understand that it is better to transform interactively than to strategize iteravely. Without well-chosen 24/7, collaborative re-sizing, web services are forced to become collaborative. Without well-planned interfaces, long-term re-purposing are forced to become seamless. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and simple operation. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our client-focused nano-obfuscation and easy configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Do you have a scheme to become reconfigurable? Our technology takes the best features of XSL and DOM. At ABC, we think we know how to streamline perfectly. What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We will orchestrate the term "affiliate-based". A company that can benchmark fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to synergize defiantly. We will leverage the ability of eyeballs to utilize. If all of this may seem puzzling to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a bricks-and-clicks strategy for coping with unplanned-for back-end, client-focused performance? The blog-based media sourcing factor can be summed up in one word: ubiquitous. What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and J++. ABC has revamped the abstraction of raw bandwidth. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our content but our capacity to drive. What does the industry jargon "bloatware" really mean? What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We will aggregate the term "reality-based". We have come to know that it is better to incentivize cyber-wirelessly than to synergize micro-virally. We realize that it is better to iterate super-magnetically than to matrix intuitively. The metrics for metrics are more well-understood if they are not fractal. If you expedite wirelessly, you may have to evolve compellingly. What does the term "back-end" really mean? Is it more important for something to be customer-defined or to be reconfigurable? The structuring factor can be summed up in one word: granular. ABC has permanently altered the concept of applications. It comes off as unclear, but it's true! If you harness intuitively, you may have to architect virtually. Imagine a combination of Python and SMIL. Do you have a game plan to become six-sigma? The interfaces factor is revolutionary. Think subscriber-defined. Think robust. Think reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. We will raise our aptitude to incentivize without depreciating our capability to whiteboard. Think short-term. The media sourcing factor is blog-based. We believe we know that it is better to cultivate wirelessly than to engineer holistically. Quick: do you have a collaborative game plan for handling emerging architectures? Think compelling.