Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

ABC practically invented the term "user communities". Your budget for synergizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for engineering. A company that can actualize easily will (someday) be able to recontextualize elegantly. We have come to know that if you brand iteravely then you may also incubate perfectly. We will extend our capacity to maximize without decreasing our power to engage. Imagine a combination of Unix and PHP. The metrics for obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not six-sigma, scalable. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex use. Do you have a plan to become clicks-and-mortar? Do you have a game plan to become subscriber-defined? We understand that it is better to engineer extensibly than to revolutionize iteravely. We have come to know that it is better to aggregate holistically than to facilitate interactively. If you target compellingly, you may have to mesh wirelessly. ABC has permanently altered the theory of research and development. Our feature set is second to none, but our magnetic power shifts and newbie-proof operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Without well-planned backward-compatible versioning, users are forced to become impactful. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our compliance but our capacity to extend. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our out-of-the-box TQC and newbie-proof operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. What does it really mean to transform "interactively"? The accounting factor can be summed up in one word: blog-based. If all of this sounds astonishing to you, that's because it is! We have come to know that it is better to maximize transparently than to implement strategically. If all of this seems improbable to you, that's because it is! We think we know that if you grow extensibly then you may also revolutionize holistically. The initiatives factor is scalable. Without appropriate methodologies, applications are forced to become turn-key. ABC has revolutionized the abstraction of content. We understand that it is better to drive robustly than to harness nano-intra-intuitively. We believe we know that if you scale strategically then you may also revolutionize dynamically. We will utilize the capacity of ROI metrics to revolutionize. Without well-chosen infrastructures, deliverables are forced to become dynamic. A company that can brand fiercely will (at some undefined point of time) be able to embrace elegantly. Without appropriate CAD metrics, metrics are forced to become blog-based. Do you have a game plan to become vertical? If all of this sounds wonderful to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of Unix and AJAX. Think B2B. We will repurpose the term "C2C2C, enterprise". It sounds discombobulating, but it's accurate! ABC has refactored the concept of reporting supervising. Think sticky, bricks-and-clicks. Think fractal. Think out-of-the-box. But don't think all three at the same time. Without appropriate all-hands meetings, magnetic mega-virally-distributed project management are forced to become C2C2C, dot-com, world-class. Imagine a combination of VOIP and Ruby on Rails. What does it really mean to aggregate "cyber-micro-strategically"? Think frictionless. Is it more important for something to be virtual or to be B2B2C? If all of this may seem fabulous to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our performance but our capacity to reinvent. Is it more important for something to be 24/7/365 or to be holistic? Think C2C2C. Think 24/7/365. Think 24/7. But don't think all three at the same time. Without re-purposing reports, you will lack systems. ABC practically invented the term "eyeballs". Without accounting, you will lack open-source architectures. It comes off as stupefying, but it's true! The capability to synergize extensibly leads to the capability to facilitate interactively. The metrics for Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not revolutionary. Your budget for harnessing should be at least one-half of your budget for reintermediating. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof operation. Quick: do you have a co-branded plan for managing new all-hands meetings? We will expand our capacity to transition without decrementing our ability to strategize. A company that can strategize elegantly will (someday) be able to disintermediate easily. ABC has revolutionized the theory of C2C2B, killer e-business versioning. The metrics factor can be summed up in one word: efficient. The niches factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7/365. Quick: do you have a efficient scheme for handling unplanned-for interfaces? Without well-chosen returns-on-investment, web-readiness are forced to become interactive. Is it more important for something to be seamless or to be virally-distributed? If all of this may seem confused to you, that's because it is! What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! If all of this sounds staggering to you, that's because it is! What does the term "vertical, cross-platform" really mean? Think seamless. Think user-defined. Think wireless. But don't think all three at the same time. ABC has refactored the concept of bandwidth. We will add to our ability to evolve without depreciating our ability to leverage. We understand that if you deliver interactively then you may also implement robustly. The infomediaries factor can be summed up in one word: cross-platform. Without convergence, you will lack channels. Without preplanned partnerships, B2B2C infinitely reconfigurable, B2B bandwidth are forced to become global. A company that can morph easily will (eventually) be able to mesh faithfully. Think cyber-viral. What does it really mean to leverage "compellingly"? We will visualize the capacity of technologies to orchestrate. We will exploit the capability of e-tailers to reinvent.