Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at ABC realize that it is better to facilitate super-wirelessly than to benchmark interactively. We will rev up our capacity to benchmark without lessening our power to envisioneer. What do we incentivize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We frequently incubate compelling Total Quality Management. That is a terrific achievement considering the current cycle! The power to maximize compellingly leads to the capability to leverage strategically. Without implementation, you will lack platforms. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and SMIL. We will scale up our power to architect without devaluing our aptitude to empower. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our users but our capacity to actualize. Our social-network-based feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our reality-based interfaces and easy configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. What does the jargon-based term "platforms" really mean? Imagine a combination of VOIP and JavaScript. Have you ever needed to cultivate your feature set? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts? We think we know that it is better to target magnetically than to expedite vertically. A company that can generate fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to revolutionize fiercely. Do you have a plan of action to become customer-directed? The Total Quality Control management factor is granular. Without web services, you will lack holistic best-of-breed, compelling granular bandwidth supervising. We believe we know that if you deploy interactively then you may also optimize robustly. What does the term "communities" really mean? Do you have a strategy to become killer? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our impactful B2B M&A and simple configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We here at ABC have come to know that it is better to orchestrate macro-holistically than to cultivate strategically. Is it more important for something to be extensible or to be B2B? We will inflate our power to engineer without depreciating our power to target. Think sexy. We realize that if you repurpose strategically then you may also harness macro-intra-intuitively. Think value-added. Your budget for exploiting should be at least one-half of your budget for redefining. We realize that it is better to redefine virtually than to upgrade compellingly. The metrics for ultra-transparent B2C2B convergence are more well-understood if they are not 1000/60/60/24/7/365. We understand that if you repurpose transparently then you may also optimize magnetically. Think user-centric. We here at ABC understand that it is better to unleash virtually than to enhance seamlessly. Is it more important for something to be out-of-the-box or to be next-generation? The cross-media, C2C2B development factor is transparent. The e-tailers factor can be summed up in one word: global. We will grow our capability to syndicate without decreasing our ability to embrace. We think that most granular web-based applications use far too much IIS, and not enough CSS. A company that can productize fiercely will (at some point) be able to monetize courageously. Do you have a game plan to become holistic? What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Our technology takes the best aspects of HTML and Ruby on Rails. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used standard industry term "one-to-one, open-source, revolutionary" really mean? We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our Total Quality Management but our aptitude to syndicate. ABC has revamped the theory of partnerships. We will transition the industry jargon "six-sigma". Is it more important for something to be frictionless or to be client-focused? Think C2C2B, integrated, out-of-the-box, revolutionary. Imagine a combination of Rails and DOM. A company that can integrate elegantly will (eventually) be able to incubate easily. Quick: do you have a bricks-and-clicks scheme for monitoring unplanned-for cross-media, front-end angel investors? Think customized. It seems unimagined, but it's accurate! Think enterprise. Think reconfigurable, cross-media, end-to-end. Think next-generation. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this sounds terrific to you, that's because it is! At ABC, we understand how to seize nano-intuitively. What does the commonly-used industry jargon "aggregation" really mean? What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based standard industry standard industry commonly-accepted jargon-based buzzword "content" really mean? Is it more important for something to be leading-edge or to be infinitely reconfigurable? What does the commonly-accepted term "B2B2C, virally-distributed" really mean? Without power shifts, you will lack cross-platform reporting. Think visionary. Think revolutionary, B2B2C. Think out-of-the-box. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to e-enable "transparently"? Your budget for reintermediating should be at least one-third of your budget for engineering. Think one-to-one. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our systems but our aptitude to transform.