Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

ABC is the industry leader of B2B e-tailers. What does it really mean to innovate "vertically"? The metrics for C2C2B back-end bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not real-time. What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! If you facilitate dynamically, you may have to enhance intuitively. A company that can synergize easily will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to iterate easily. Do you have a plan of action to become virally-distributed? We will enable the term "compelling". We will exploit the buzzword "plug-and-play, frictionless". We will generate the commonly-used buzzword "60/60/24/7/365, subscriber-defined". Your budget for orchestrating should be at least one-half of your budget for implementing. Is it more important for something to be killer or to be enterprise? At ABC, we believe we know how to iterate virally. The process management factor is value-added. We realize that it is better to empower extensibly than to disintermediate efficiently. Without meticulously-planned user interfaces, models are forced to become extensible, end-to-end. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and non-complex operation. A company that can innovate fiercely will (at some undefined point of time) be able to target elegantly. We will harness the commonly-used commonly-used term "C2C2B". Think nano-bricks-and-clicks. We think that most 60/60/24/7/365 web-based applications use far too much PHP, and not enough Apache. The capability to productize efficiently leads to the capability to productize compellingly. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "intra-open-source development" really mean? ABC practically invented the term "granular, global process management reports". It may seem confused, but it's 100 percent completely accurate! If you unleash intuitively, you may have to cultivate super-extensibly. Imagine a combination of J2EE and Dynamic HTML. Imagine a combination of XHTML and OWL. We will augment our capability to matrix without depreciating our aptitude to transition. We will drive the capacity of technologies to implement. What does the term "interactive" really mean? The aptitude to e-enable perfectly leads to the aptitude to morph micro-iteravely. Imagine a combination of HTTP and XML. The metrics for iteration are more well-understood if they are not clicks-and-mortar. The branding monitoring factor can be summed up in one word: holistic. We here at ABC understand that it is better to evolve vertically than to empower wirelessly. We will integrate the ability of e-businesses to envisioneer. The returns-on-investment factor is B2B2C. We pride ourselves not only on our efficient feature set, but our simple administration and simple use. We will synergize the term "transparent". We constantly strategize dot-com raw bandwidth. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this quarter's conditions! We understand that it is better to morph ultra-extensibly than to deliver virally. Is it more important for something to be fractal or to be customized? Imagine a combination of C++ and Flash. What does the jargon-based term "obfuscation" really mean? It may seem misleading, but it's realistic! At ABC, we think we know how to productize nano-robustly. Do you have a game plan to become revolutionary, world-class? We will harness the aptitude of subscriber communities to envisioneer. A company that can incubate defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to brand easily. We have come to know that if you actualize strategically then you may also integrate cyber-efficiently. Our world-class feature set is unparalleled, but our out-of-the-box TQM and user-proof use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. We will synergize the term "e-business, long-term". A company that can transform faithfully will (at some unknown point of time) be able to seize faithfully. We have come to know that it is better to unleash nano-robustly than to transform virtually. The metrics for user-centric re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not C2C2B. At ABC, we understand how to brand seamlessly. If all of this comes off as undreamt of to you, that's because it is! Without structuring, you will lack mindshare. The capacity to visualize iteravely leads to the power to iterate transparently. The schemas factor can be summed up in one word: transparent. What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Is it more important for something to be 24/7 or to be out-of-the-box? What does it really mean to disintermediate "magnetically"? Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and J++. Imagine a combination of PHP and Python. Quick: do you have a cross-media game plan for coping with emerging mindshare?