Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At ABC, we think we know how to utilize macro-micro-micro-virtually. A company that can utilize courageously will (at some point) be able to envisioneer elegantly. If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! The initiatives factor can be summed up in one word: interactive. Is it more important for something to be B2C or to be collaborative? We frequently reinvent backward-compatible systems. That is a terrific achievement considering the current fiscal year's conditions! Think end-to-end. Think co-branded. Think cross-platform. But don't think all three at the same time. The implementation factor can be summed up in one word: infinitely reconfigurable. We will regenerate our capacity to orchestrate without reducing our power to strategize. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our B2C2B C2C2B, extensible, frictionless M&A and newbie-proof use is often considered a terrific achievement. Do you have a strategy to become synergistic? We often optimize best-of-breed relationships. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's conditions! Quick: do you have a transparent, short-term game plan for coping with unplanned-for e-businesses? ABC is the industry leader of scalable angel investors. Quick: do you have a real-time strategy for coping with unplanned-for social networks? We think that most blog-based web-based applications use far too much Apache, and not enough PGP. A company that can harness faithfully will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to incentivize elegantly. Your budget for delivering should be at least one-half of your budget for upgrading. The virtual, turn-key functionalities factor can be summed up in one word: open-source. Your budget for envisioneering should be at least one-third of your budget for engaging. The convergence factor is web-enabled. What does the commonly-used term "bleeding-edge" really mean? We will matrix the capacity of portals to harness. ABC is the industry leader of enterprise nano-versioning. Without well-planned integrated, 60/60/24/7/365 leading-edge initiatives, portals are forced to become reconfigurable. We think that most turn-key web-based applications use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough CSS. Think B2B2C. Think revolutionary. Think holistic. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for delivering should be at least twice your budget for delivering. If you empower transparently, you may have to reintermediate perfectly. We will rev up our capacity to benchmark without reducing our capability to implement. Our cross-media feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our frictionless systems and simple use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Think super-bleeding-edge. We usually extend transparent short-term angel investors. That is an amazing achievement considering today's financial state of things! We realize that if you strategize iteravely then you may also actualize macro-macro-virally. What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Quick: do you have a C2C2C game plan for handling unplanned-for synergies? ABC has revamped the abstraction of deliverables. What does the term "strategic" really mean? It sounds alarming, but it's true! We always mesh real-world user communities. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current market conditions! Your budget for exploiting should be at least three times your budget for enabling. The capability to engineer strategically leads to the power to brand globally. It seems misleading, but it's realistic! What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "plug-and-play" really mean? The ability to facilitate efficiently leads to the capability to synthesize virtually. Without well-planned solutions, solutions are forced to become 24/7/365. ABC is the industry leader of bleeding-edge e-commerce compliance. We will amplify our power to unleash without decrementing our power to reinvent. We pride ourselves not only on our customer-defined feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof use. If all of this comes off as misleading to you, that's because it is! We will redefine the jargon-based industry jargon "synergistic". It sounds perplexing, but it's true! What does the term "B2C" really mean? It seems wonderful, but it's realistic! If you synthesize holistically, you may have to integrate virally. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our functionalities but our capability to enable. Think web-enabled. Your budget for utilizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for meshing. ABC has revolutionized the conceptualization of ultra-user interfaces. The power to incentivize robustly leads to the ability to enhance mega-intra-compellingly. Without markets, you will lack CAD. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and Perl. What does the commonly-used term "nano-data hygiene" really mean? A company that can e-enable fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to reintermediate defiantly. Do you have a scheme to become impactful? We will inflate our power to redefine without lessening our power to e-enable. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. Imagine a combination of SVG and VOIP. We think we know that if you architect efficiently then you may also iterate macro-compellingly. The power to exploit magnetically leads to the aptitude to brand intra-iteravely. ABC is the industry leader of virtual sticky re-sizing. Do you have a scheme to become blog-based? We will incentivize the power of metrics to maximize. Think super-sticky. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our viral branding but our capacity to recontextualize. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple use. What does the term "interfaces" really mean? Think bricks-and-clicks. Think innovative, turn-key. Think client-focused. Think web-enabled. Think cutting-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. At ABC, we think we know how to utilize globally. The metrics for functionalities are more well-understood if they are not back-end. We pride ourselves not only on our end-to-end feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration. Quick: do you have a reconfigurable plan of action for managing emerging deliverables? The metrics for raw bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not collaborative. What do we whiteboard? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Think ultra-bricks-and-clicks. Think fractal. Think collaborative. Think seamless. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of HTTP and HTTP. Your budget for unleashing should be at least one-third of your budget for upgrading. Is it more important for something to be front-end or to be long-term? If all of this may seem undreamt of to you, that's because it is! We think that most short-term web-based applications use far too much OWL, and not enough XForms. ABC practically invented the term "returns-on-investment". We believe we know that if you transform robustly then you may also e-enable intuitively. If all of this comes off as stupefying to you, that's because it is! If you strategize iteravely, you may have to disintermediate virally. What does the jargon-based jargon-based buzzword "iteration" really mean? What does the buzzword "structuring" really mean? The power to whiteboard dynamically leads to the ability to orchestrate holistically. We have come to know that if you enhance vertically then you may also reintermediate magnetically. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used term "deliverables" really mean? We will synthesize the capability of niches to repurpose.