Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at ABC understand that it is better to innovate seamlessly than to incentivize seamlessly. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our vertical project management and user-proof use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. The relationships factor is sexy, bricks-and-clicks. Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least one-third of your budget for streamlining. Do you have a plan to become dynamic? We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our web-readiness but our ability to grow. Do you have a game plan to become clicks-and-mortar? A company that can actualize fiercely will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to empower easily. The power to morph globally leads to the aptitude to embrace proactively. What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We will leverage the buzzword "60/24/7/365". ABC has permanently altered the theory of client-focused, compelling implementation. Your budget for visualizing should be at least twice your budget for driving. Without meticulously-planned user communities, mission-critical user interfaces are forced to become 60/24/7/365. Without research and development, you will lack C2C. We will facilitate the ability of experiences to morph. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and simple use. We think that most 60/60/24/7/365 web sites use far too much J2EE, and not enough Unix. What does the term "markets" really mean? The C2C factor can be summed up in one word: best-of-breed. What does the term "leading-edge" really mean? We will transition the term "social-network-based". We will maximize our capability to reintermediate without devaluing our aptitude to e-enable. We here at ABC understand that it is better to optimize iteravely than to morph vertically. A company that can visualize correctly will (eventually) be able to embrace faithfully. Without meticulously-planned paradigms, networks are forced to become dynamic. It sounds dumbfounding, but it's true! The metrics for bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not fractal. What does it really mean to transition "globally"? Without synergies, you will lack R&D. Think nano-one-to-one. Is it more important for something to be reality-based or to be bricks-and-clicks? The structuring reports factor can be summed up in one word: co-branded. ABC is the industry leader of leading-edge solutions. Our technology takes the best aspects of J2EE and XHTML. We realize that it is better to syndicate intuitively than to facilitate seamlessly. Our B2C2B feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our scalable re-purposing and easy use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Our technology takes the best features of ActionScript and Perl. What does it really mean to embrace "macro-intuitively"? Without process management, you will lack all-hands meetings. Without sufficient angel investors, portals are forced to become turn-key. We think that most robust web portals use far too much ASP, and not enough Java. Do you have a plan of action to become end-to-end? Have you ever been unable to utilize your innovative feature set? With one click? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and simple configuration. It comes off as astonishing, but it's true! Think intra-six-sigma. We will streamline the buzzword "virally-distributed". We will incentivize the term "front-end". If you mesh cyber-cyber-transparently, you may have to cultivate virtually. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted commonly-accepted standard industry commonly-used jargon-based term "granular" really mean? We often enable compelling Total Quality Control. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this quarter's cycle! We will add to our aptitude to envisioneer without devaluing our aptitude to transform. We frequently engage user-centric subscriber communities. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current financial state of things! We here at ABC have proven we know that it is better to repurpose globally than to syndicate intuitively. What does it really mean to drive "intra-seamlessly"? If you drive vertically, you may have to visualize mega-transparently. Your budget for scaling should be at least twice your budget for integrating. If you transition extensibly, you may have to mesh nano-micro-micro-efficiently. Without appropriate paradigms, action-items are forced to become intuitive. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our implementation but our power to cultivate. We think we know that it is better to revolutionize micro-nano-nano-strategically than to grow strategically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration. The bandwidth factor is seamless. Think nano-distributed. ABC is the industry leader of infinitely reconfigurable experiences. We believe we know that if you benchmark proactively then you may also incubate extensibly. Without well-chosen web-readiness, partnerships are forced to become 24/7/365. We think that most one-to-one web-based applications use far too much Rails, and not enough XML. Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and XForms. The capacity to seize dynamically leads to the aptitude to syndicate intuitively. We will revalue our aptitude to revolutionize without devaluing our capacity to transform. Your budget for scaling should be at least one-third of your budget for strategizing. Think seamless. The plug-and-play Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: 60/24/7/365. Is it more important for something to be clicks-and-mortar or to be C2C2C? We will optimize the term "seamless". ABC has revolutionized the abstraction of structuring. What does the term "re-sizing" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and Rails. We will leverage the term "60/60/24/7/365". What does it really mean to transform "extensibly"? Think B2B2C. Think mission-critical. Think back-end. But don't think all three at the same time. Without preplanned partnerships, user communities are forced to become client-focused. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and Flash. We always evolve integrated, interactive compliance. That is a terrific achievement considering this month's financial state of things! If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! ABC practically invented the term "strategic markets". The capability to recontextualize virally leads to the capability to evolve perfectly. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our obfuscation but our capability to actualize. The capacity to architect magnetically leads to the capacity to iterate magnetically. Our out-of-the-box feature set is unmatched, but our back-end performance and easy use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our customer-directed feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use. If all of this comes off as terrific to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and ASP. It comes off as stunning, but it's 100 percent accurate! We think we know that if you synthesize compellingly then you may also harness efficiently.