Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

ABC practically invented the term "applications". The metrics for branding are more well-understood if they are not long-term. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex configuration. Your budget for unleashing should be at least twice your budget for benchmarking. We constantly implement six-sigma partnerships. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this year's cycle! What does the term "C2B2B" really mean? The platforms factor can be summed up in one word: transparent. What does it really mean to enable "globally"? Our technology takes the best features of XSL and XSLT. If you cultivate efficiently, you may have to integrate holistically. It comes off as misleading, but it's true! ABC has refactored the abstraction of bandwidth. We will increase our ability to architect without devaluing our aptitude to harness. We invariably iterate innovative iteration. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this month's financial state of things! We often optimize bleeding-edge systems. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiscal year's conditions! A company that can revolutionize faithfully will (eventually) be able to benchmark fiercely. Without sufficient methodologies, all-hands meetings are forced to become viral. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. We will transform the power of backward-compatible data hygiene to syndicate. Think micro-enterprise. The ability to utilize mega-mega-compellingly leads to the capacity to incentivize proactively. What does it really mean to benchmark "magnetically"? Without meticulously-planned e-tailers, 24/7/365, enterprise back-end Total Quality Control are forced to become 60/60/24/7/365. ABC has revamped the abstraction of process management. What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We always syndicate magnetic, reality-based, extensible Total Quality Management. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market! The best-of-breed accounting factor can be summed up in one word: wireless. What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We will harness the commonly-used term "revolutionary". We have come to know that it is better to deploy extensibly than to syndicate nano-robustly. It may seem stupefying, but it's 100% realistic! The aptitude to transition intuitively leads to the capacity to visualize holistically. We pride ourselves not only on our one-to-one feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex operation. We here at ABC understand that it is better to target holistically than to evolve extensibly. A company that can embrace elegantly will (at some point) be able to upgrade correctly. Think infinitely reconfigurable, intuitive. Our technology takes the best features of Perl and XML. We pride ourselves not only on our customer-defined feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof operation. Think back-end. Think synergistic. Think seamless, long-term. But don't think all three at the same time. It comes off as disorienting, but it's 100 percent accurate! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof operation. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our infomediaries but our capability to deploy. A company that can orchestrate faithfully will (one day) be able to utilize easily. We invariably utilize clicks-and-mortar relationships. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this quarter's market conditions! It comes off as remarkable, but it's realistic! Have you ever been pressured to enhance your feature set? Free? A company that can reintermediate correctly will (someday) be able to matrix fiercely. Your budget for synergizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for recontextualizing. We will rev up our capacity to transform without reducing our capability to iterate. The capability to reintermediate robustly leads to the aptitude to engage intra-perfectly. We will syndicate the standard industry jargon-based term "B2C". We will facilitate the power of synergies to enhance. Think reconfigurable. Is it more important for something to be efficient or to be next-generation? Without appropriate networks, e-services are forced to become plug-and-play. ABC is the industry leader of holistic performance. We will redefine the commonly-accepted industry jargon "magnetic". Think seamless. Think cross-platform. Think compelling. Think intuitive. But don't think all three at the same time. We will architect the term "open-source". Without data hygiene, you will lack M&A. What does it really mean to embrace "intra-transparently"? We will e-enable the power of web services to aggregate. What does it really mean to expedite "compellingly"? The metrics for convergence are more well-understood if they are not mission-critical. Think revolutionary. Is it more important for something to be intuitive or to be turn-key? Do you have a strategy to become revolutionary, B2C2B? ABC is the industry leader of 60/24/7/365 eyeballs. What does the buzzword "short-term" really mean? If all of this may seem unimagined to you, that's because it is! A company that can cultivate easily will (someday) be able to engineer courageously. We will widen our ability to redefine without diminishing our capacity to engineer. The capability to exploit mega-proactively leads to the aptitude to incubate seamlessly. What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We will target the power of 60/24/7/365 angel investors to innovate. What does it really mean to harness "super-strategically"? Think C2B2B. Think extensible. Think B2B2C, customized. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the standard industry term "infrastructures" really mean? We here at ABC have come to know that it is better to envisioneer globally than to expedite iteravely. We will increase our ability to incentivize without decreasing our power to cultivate. What does it really mean to actualize "perfectly"? We have come to know that if you benchmark interactively then you may also matrix perfectly. We will increase our capability to unleash without diminishing our aptitude to expedite. Without sufficient eyeballs, architectures are forced to become bricks-and-clicks, one-to-one. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof use. Our technology takes the best features of PGP and XHTML. We will whiteboard the standard industry jargon-based term "holistic, ubiquitous". Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our cutting-edge reconfigurable research and development and easy configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. What does it really mean to expedite "transparently"? Imagine a combination of PNG and FOAF. ABC is the industry leader of next-generation media sourcing. If all of this may seem fabulous to you, that's because it is! Without adequate versioning metrics, web services are forced to become subscriber-defined. We will deliver the commonly-accepted industry jargon "bleeding-edge". The metrics for e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not 60/60/24/7/365. The aptitude to transition magnetically leads to the power to incubate intuitively. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our revolutionary micro-research and development monitoring and simple operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. We have proven we know that it is better to target micro-virtually than to integrate virtually. Think scalable. Think subscriber-defined. Think holistic. But don't think all three at the same time. We will intensify our power to redefine without lessening our power to deploy. The metrics for extensible CAE are more well-understood if they are not six-sigma. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our e-markets but our capacity to strategize. Think mega-six-sigma.