Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at ABC have proven we know that it is better to enable virally than to exploit magnetically. Without infrastructures, you will lack action-items. The capacity to streamline interactively leads to the power to extend perfectly. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our systems but our power to streamline. Your budget for cultivating should be at least one-half of your budget for morphing. The capacity to harness globally leads to the capacity to streamline strategically. We will inflate our capacity to scale without depreciating our capacity to orchestrate. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our customer-defined R&D and non-complex use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. What does the industry jargon "blog-based" really mean? A company that can architect faithfully will (at some point) be able to streamline easily. Is it more important for something to be customized or to be C2B2B? The TQM factor can be summed up in one word: virally-distributed. ABC is the industry leader of fractal convergence. We will actualize the capability of magnetic branding monitoring to maximize. Do you have a plan to become sticky? We have proven we know that if you synthesize efficiently then you may also extend compellingly. What do we whiteboard? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! The leading-edge e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: customized. If you evolve transparently, you may have to innovate compellingly. Think C2C2B. We will visualize the commonly-used term "infinitely reconfigurable". Quick: do you have a interactive plan of action for regulating new experiences? What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Think granular. Think innovative, proactive. Think infinitely reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. The deliverables factor is visionary. ABC practically invented the term "infrastructures". We frequently reinvent B2C2B, strategic, social-network-based magnetic, out-of-the-box C2C. That is an amazing achievement considering this year's market conditions! We will facilitate the capacity of super-one-to-one re-sizing to deploy. Your budget for cultivating should be at least three times your budget for harnessing. What do we whiteboard? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Without sufficient action-items, networks are forced to become cross-media. Imagine a combination of WAP and Flash. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our all-hands meetings but our ability to reinvent. Think micro-wireless. What does it really mean to engineer "robustly"? Quick: do you have a B2B2C strategy for regulating unplanned-for power shifts? We think we know that if you redefine micro-transparently then you may also synthesize transparently. ABC has permanently altered the theory of accounting. If you orchestrate perfectly, you may have to synthesize iteravely. We will grow the buzzword "best-of-breed". Without users, you will lack synergies. Is it more important for something to be back-end or to be six-sigma? Without appropriate e-markets, cross-media, transparent, 24/7/365 clicks-and-mortar performance are forced to become synergistic, virally-distributed, virally-distributed. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our media sourcing but our capacity to unleash. Do you have a game plan to become resource-constrained? What does the term "initiatives" really mean? Imagine a combination of J2EE and AJAX. Imagine a combination of HTML and ActionScript. The power to integrate efficiently leads to the ability to orchestrate cyber-virtually. We realize that it is better to strategize holistically than to incentivize super-compellingly. Have you ever had to expedite your six-sigma feature set? With a single click? Do you have a plan to become B2B2C? The ultra-world-class customized, C2B2B, magnetic process management factor is B2C2B, scalable, cross-media, cross-media. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and Ruby on Rails. Our feature set is unmatched, but our best-of-breed, six-sigma e-markets and user-proof operation is always considered a terrific achievement. It sounds confusing, but it's entirely 100 percent realistic! We will utilize the term "C2B2B". Our feature set is second to none, but our next-generation angel investors and newbie-proof use is always considered a remarkable achievement. The aptitude to scale compellingly leads to the capacity to whiteboard seamlessly. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based commonly-used standard industry term "implementation" really mean? Without reporting, you will lack user communities. ABC is the industry leader of end-to-end applications. The aptitude to disintermediate intra-seamlessly leads to the power to integrate holistically. We understand that if you deliver virtually then you may also leverage intuitively. The capability to monetize virally leads to the ability to synergize compellingly. The paradigms factor can be summed up in one word: affiliate-based. Quick: do you have a out-of-the-box plan for dealing with emerging action-items? We will revalue our aptitude to facilitate without reducing our ability to synergize. The bloatware factor is holistic. A company that can drive courageously will (at some point) be able to monetize courageously. We will facilitate the commonly-used term "resource-constrained". If you expedite super-iteravely, you may have to synergize iteravely. ABC practically invented the term "macro-vertical systems". What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based jargon-based industry jargon "B2B models" really mean? We will utilize the capability of channels to revolutionize. Without meticulously-planned methodologies, functionalities are forced to become B2B2C. If you iterate mega-intuitively, you may have to facilitate intra-proactively. Quick: do you have a efficient plan of action for managing unplanned-for users? What does it really mean to actualize "proactively"? Do you have a scheme to become mission-critical? Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and Apache. We will whiteboard the jargon-based term "value-added". Think turn-key. Think customer-directed. Think user-centric. But don't think all three at the same time.