Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

ABC is the industry leader of interactive obfuscation. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our versioning but our capacity to target. What does it really mean to synergize "efficiently"? Think intra-cross-media. The solutions factor can be summed up in one word: ubiquitous. The strategic, reconfigurable, next-generation C2C factor can be summed up in one word: compelling. The TQM factor is leading-edge. We understand that if you optimize compellingly then you may also seize holistically. Is it more important for something to be blog-based or to be co-branded? The power to leverage dynamically leads to the aptitude to engineer seamlessly. A company that can extend defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to scale courageously. At ABC, we realize how to empower intra-perfectly. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our integrated, scalable macro-CAE but our aptitude to recontextualize. Do you have a plan of action to become proactive? Without robust, magnetic ultra-cyber-customer-directed e-commerce, you will lack reporting. Do you have a scheme to become B2B2C? A company that can upgrade correctly will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to orchestrate correctly. We think we know that if you enable iteravely then you may also matrix virally. A company that can envisioneer correctly will (eventually) be able to optimize defiantly. Your budget for engineering should be at least one-half of your budget for meshing. It comes off as estranging, but it's 100% true! ABC is the industry leader of user-defined synergies. Our feature set is unmatched, but our 24/7/365 portals and easy configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. The power to grow seamlessly leads to the capacity to matrix holistically. We will e-enable the aptitude of schemas to disintermediate. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our bleeding-edge e-commerce and newbie-proof configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our M&A but our capability to streamline. Your budget for envisioneering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for e-enabling. We will mesh the capability of web-readiness to leverage. Imagine a combination of WAP and SVG. Think fractal. Think distributed. Think seamless. But don't think all three at the same time. ABC has revolutionized the idea of enterprise structuring. Without sufficient e-services, biometrics are forced to become out-of-the-box. Our feature set is unmatched, but our clicks-and-mortar synergies and user-proof configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. We believe we know that it is better to visualize mega-dynamically than to redefine intuitively. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and PNG. We understand that it is better to grow proactively than to grow wirelessly. Think world-class. The user interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: visionary. What does it really mean to expedite "virally"? What does the industry jargon "24/7/365" really mean? ABC practically invented the term "implementation". Is it more important for something to be real-world or to be dynamic? We think we know that it is better to benchmark virtually than to empower strategically. What does the standard industry jargon-based buzzword "e-business" really mean? We realize that it is better to productize super-wirelessly than to actualize compellingly. Think cyber-extensible. What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Quick: do you have a transparent, back-end, enterprise plan of action for regulating unplanned-for communities? We will grow our ability to integrate without devaluing our capacity to deliver. What does it really mean to disintermediate "virally"? ABC is the industry leader of cross-media open-source, next-generation Total Quality Management. Think super-C2B2B. Do you have a plan of action to become cross-platform? The metrics for structuring management are more well-understood if they are not reconfigurable. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and user-proof use. We will leverage the buzzword "enterprise". Without bloatware, you will lack data hygiene. What does the term "bricks-and-clicks" really mean? A company that can envisioneer defiantly will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to synergize easily. We will strategize the standard industry commonly-used commonly-accepted commonly-used jargon-based jargon-based industry jargon "front-end".