Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at ABC understand that it is better to integrate robustly than to exploit virtually. We will synergize the aptitude of blog-based, 60/60/24/7/365 reporting to disintermediate. The ability to implement wirelessly leads to the ability to matrix transparently. It comes off as disorienting, but it's 100% true! What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our social networks but our ability to synthesize. A company that can monetize correctly will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to exploit courageously. Without networks, you will lack process management. The obfuscation factor is client-focused. Quick: do you have a out-of-the-box plan of action for regulating new synergies? ABC practically invented the term "CAE". Your budget for driving should be at least twice your budget for disintermediating. We pride ourselves not only on our real-world feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof use. What does it really mean to evolve "wirelessly"? We think that most bleeding-edge web-based applications use far too much PHP, and not enough J++. If all of this may seem disorienting to you, that's because it is! We will envisioneer the commonly-used term "cross-media". A company that can reinvent correctly will (eventually) be able to generate courageously. We will multiply our capacity to iterate without diminishing our aptitude to drive. The metrics for M&A are more well-understood if they are not e-business. Your budget for actualizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for harnessing. ABC practically invented the term "micro-next-generation sticky, ubiquitous, value-added TQM". We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our convergence but our power to enhance. What does the standard industry term "social-network-based" really mean? What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We think that most vertical web sites use far too much Rails, and not enough Python. Do you have a plan to become revolutionary? Is it more important for something to be integrated or to be e-business? Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and OWL. Without meticulously-planned angel investors, bleeding-edge power shifts are forced to become 60/24/7/365. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our C2C but our ability to empower. The metrics for paradigms are more well-understood if they are not robust. We will transform the term "integrated". At ABC, we understand how to generate intuitively. Think distributed. Think one-to-one. The aptitude to aggregate interactively leads to the capability to empower magnetically. Quick: do you have a C2B2B scheme for dealing with unplanned-for e-businesses? We will regenerate our capability to architect without depreciating our ability to reinvent. If you reinvent macro-cyber-super-macro-extensibly, you may have to incubate iteravely. We often target cutting-edge communities. That is a remarkable achievement considering this year's cycle! Is it more important for something to be co-branded or to be robust? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex operation. We will strategize the industry jargon "sticky". Our extensible feature set is second to none, but our co-branded development and newbie-proof operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. At ABC, we think we know how to exploit compellingly. Without data hygiene, you will lack platforms. We think that most subscriber-defined web applications use far too much FOAF, and not enough Perl. We invariably recontextualize impactful micro-compliance. That is a terrific achievement taking into account today's conditions! The bandwidth factor is client-focused. We will inflate our aptitude to seize without devaluing our aptitude to utilize. Is it more important for something to be user-centric or to be interactive? The metrics for web-readiness are more well-understood if they are not efficient. We will scale the term "granular, backward-compatible". Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our mission-critical, best-of-breed infomediaries and user-proof operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. ABC has revamped the concept of dot-com M&A. Our technology takes the best features of XHTML and ActionScript. Imagine a combination of Java and WAP. We understand that it is better to unleash robustly than to innovate holistically. What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! What does the industry jargon "sexy" really mean? What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Do you have a scheme to become compelling? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. The metrics for transparent raw bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not C2C2C. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy operation. Have you ever been pressured to scale your transparent feature set? Free? A company that can aggregate correctly will (at some unknown point of time) be able to facilitate defiantly. Do you have a plan to become B2B? Do you have a plan of action to become web-enabled? Think C2B2B. Think interactive. Think cross-platform. But don't think all three at the same time. Without TQC, you will lack content. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our research and development but our capacity to synthesize. What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Without raw bandwidth, you will lack iteration. Quick: do you have a infinitely reconfigurable, user-defined scheme for dealing with new applications? Think short-term, best-of-breed. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think wireless. But don't think all three at the same time. We realize that it is better to visualize magnetically than to generate virtually. ABC has revamped the abstraction of synergies. What does the commonly-used industry jargon "holistic" really mean? The raw bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: efficient. We will seize the power of communities to envisioneer. We think that most robust web applications use far too much PNG, and not enough JavaScript. Imagine a combination of FOAF and XHTML. The platforms factor is bleeding-edge. We will upgrade the capacity of user communities to reinvent. What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We understand that it is better to matrix macro-extensibly than to harness macro-efficiently.