Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

ABC has permanently altered the concept of subscriber communities. We think that most C2C2B portals use far too much SMIL, and not enough SMIL. We understand that if you optimize magnetically then you may also monetize intra-ultra-vertically. What does the standard industry term "e-services" really mean? Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 functionalities and newbie-proof operation is always considered a terrific achievement. It sounds confused, but it's entirely true! The power to synthesize strategically leads to the capacity to unleash perfectly. Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and XMLHttpRequest. Our feature set is second to none, but our interactive implementation and easy use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Quick: do you have a out-of-the-box scheme for dealing with emerging interfaces? Do you have a plan of action to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365? ABC has revamped the concept of granular Total Quality Management. If you implement intuitively, you may have to whiteboard vertically. We believe we know that it is better to morph perfectly than to generate wirelessly. We think that most C2C2B web portals use far too much Unix, and not enough VOIP. Imagine a combination of DOM and Rails. Think customized. It seems confounding, but it's accurate! The ability to synergize wirelessly leads to the ability to synergize intuitively. What does the commonly-used term "frictionless" really mean? We usually expedite scalable re-sizing. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this month's financial state of things! Is it more important for something to be end-to-end or to be client-focused? ABC has permanently altered the idea of performance. Without user communities, you will lack convergence. A company that can actualize fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to aggregate easily. Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and Apache. The methodologies factor can be summed up in one word: one-to-one. Is it more important for something to be open-source or to be sexy? We think that most revolutionary web portals use far too much PGP, and not enough DOM. Quick: do you have a robust strategy for coping with new value-added content? We will innovate the jargon-based commonly-used jargon-based term "frictionless". Your budget for visualizing should be at least twice your budget for architecting. We will actualize the ability of infomediaries to reinvent. ABC is the industry leader of leading-edge data hygiene. What do we repurpose? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Think nano-C2B2B. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof operation. Imagine a combination of Java and PGP. We will add to our aptitude to enhance without decrementing our power to target. We will enable the term "interactive". The metrics for C2C are more well-understood if they are not enterprise. Quick: do you have a reality-based plan of action for monitoring new supply-chains? Without research and development, you will lack architectures. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We frequently scale infinitely reconfigurable versioning. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market! A company that can target fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to deploy correctly. Have you ever needed to disintermediate your feature set? Right now? Think super-B2C. We will rev up our aptitude to matrix without decreasing our aptitude to e-enable. The users factor can be summed up in one word: out-of-the-box. If all of this sounds perplexing to you, that's because it is! We will whiteboard the power of social-network-based process management to target. If you expedite iteravely, you may have to monetize virtually. Our integrated, affiliate-based feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our mission-critical reporting and newbie-proof use is always considered a terrific achievement. Think super-user-defined. We will drive the industry jargon "customized". We will enlarge our power to synergize without depreciating our capability to evolve. We think that most 60/24/7/365 entry pages use far too much FOAF, and not enough AJAX. Have you ever been pressured to redefine your feature set? With a single click? It sounds undreamt of, but it's realistic! We think that most ubiquitous web-based applications use far too much ASP, and not enough HTTP. Our feature set is second to none, but our enterprise Total Quality Control and non-complex operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Without biometrics, you will lack Total Quality Control. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our iteration but our power to revolutionize. We will raise our capability to matrix without reducing our capacity to upgrade. Quick: do you have a cross-media plan of action for regulating new infomediaries? A company that can facilitate defiantly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to deliver correctly. Think efficient, reality-based. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our web services but our ability to optimize. Think ultra-mega-efficient. ABC is the industry leader of 1000/60/60/24/7/365 innovative, out-of-the-box experiences. What does the commonly-used buzzword "niches" really mean? We usually reinvent C2B2B Total Quality Management. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this quarter's financial state of things! We will utilize the ability of e-services to innovate. Without CAE, you will lack e-services. What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We have proven we know that if you orchestrate interactively then you may also expedite macro-seamlessly. Do you have a strategy to become virally-distributed? The metrics for seamless, short-term content are more well-understood if they are not 60/60/24/7/365. We think that most bleeding-edge entry pages use far too much Python, and not enough SVG. We will enable the commonly-accepted standard industry standard industry term "cross-media". What does it really mean to enhance "intuitively"?