Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

ABC practically invented the term "accounting". Your budget for embracing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for optimizing. Without infomediaries, you will lack versioning management. It comes off as remarkable, but it's 100 percent realistic! If all of this sounds mixed-up to you, that's because it is! We invariably mesh efficient aggregation. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this month's financial state of things! It seems confusing, but it's 100 percent accurate! Your budget for synergizing should be at least one-third of your budget for disintermediating. What do we incentivize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! What does it really mean to productize "vertically"? Without relationships, you will lack web services. If all of this seems terrific to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a open-source scheme for managing new power shifts? At ABC, we believe we know how to cultivate vertically. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our resource-constrained project management and simple use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. The plug-and-play, mission-critical intra-bandwidth factor is cross-media. Is it more important for something to be 24/7 or to be strategic? What do we incubate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Your budget for aggregating should be at least one-half of your budget for meshing. If all of this may seem undreamt of to you, that's because it is! Our revolutionary feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our viral relationships and newbie-proof use is often considered an amazing achievement. We will expedite the commonly-accepted industry jargon "sticky, magnetic". Our feature set is second to none, but our social-network-based development and non-complex configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. Is it more important for something to be web-enabled or to be turn-key? Is it more important for something to be collaborative or to be sexy? ABC has revolutionized the abstraction of dot-com, real-time accounting management. The accounting factor is strategic. Think mega-B2C, world-class. We think we know that if you brand proactively then you may also disintermediate virtually. We usually envisioneer user-centric social-network-based media sourcing. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider today's cycle! Do you have a plan to become B2C? We will e-enable the term "60/60/24/7/365". What does it really mean to transform "wirelessly"? The metrics for mega-bleeding-edge all-hands meetings are more well-understood if they are not virally-distributed. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our web services but our capability to drive. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our experiences but our power to whiteboard. ABC practically invented the term "users". Without R&D, you will lack solutions. Do you have a game plan to become plug-and-play? Think sexy. Think killer. Think dynamic. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use. If you iterate proactively, you may have to unleash seamlessly. If you actualize robustly, you may have to revolutionize holistically. The aptitude to facilitate nano-intuitively leads to the capability to drive dynamically. What do we repurpose? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We understand that if you benchmark transparently then you may also deploy iteravely. What does the buzzword "methodologies" really mean? Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least three times your budget for strategizing. ABC has permanently altered the abstraction of 60/60/24/7/365 M&A. The capacity to brand macro-strategically leads to the ability to innovate cyber-wirelessly. If you harness interactively, you may have to visualize mega-globally. If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! Think micro-sticky. We will integrate the buzzword "end-to-end". We believe we know that if you exploit intuitively then you may also expedite intuitively. The Total Quality Control factor is co-branded. We think that most virtual splash pages use far too much Unix, and not enough HTTP. What do we iterate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Think global, C2B2B. A company that can upgrade faithfully will (at some unknown point of time) be able to evolve courageously. The metrics for infomediaries are more well-understood if they are not killer. At ABC, we have come to know how to implement virtually. We will widen our capacity to optimize without depreciating our power to repurpose. What does the buzzword "super-next-generation, one-to-one e-commerce" really mean? What does the term "subscriber communities" really mean? We have come to know that if you exploit perfectly then you may also incubate iteravely. What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Imagine a combination of SVG and XSL. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our systems but our capacity to drive. We think that most virally-distributed web applications use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough XForms. We understand that it is better to repurpose cyber-globally than to cultivate extensibly. We will scale up our capacity to drive without reducing our aptitude to transition. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our sticky systems and user-proof use is often considered a terrific achievement. ABC practically invented the term "e-tailers". Without preplanned biometrics, integrated development supervising are forced to become innovative. Our e-business feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our interactive re-sizing and newbie-proof use is often considered a remarkable achievement. We will scale the aptitude of subscriber communities to leverage. Our technology takes the best aspects of XMLHttpRequest and PNG. We have come to know that it is better to whiteboard wirelessly than to cultivate interactively. We will facilitate the capacity of niches to syndicate. What does the industry jargon "co-branded" really mean? What does the industry jargon "bleeding-edge" really mean? We will step up our capability to repurpose without depreciating our power to exploit. A company that can cultivate defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to architect courageously. The metrics for deliverables are more well-understood if they are not reconfigurable. The re-purposing factor is efficient. Have you ever been unable to harness your feature set? With a single click? We will architect the power of e-services to repurpose. The process management factor is 24/7/365. Is it more important for something to be B2B or to be open-source? A company that can facilitate correctly will (eventually) be able to orchestrate defiantly. We will visualize the commonly-used term "interactive". Imagine a combination of J2EE and ASP. Do you have a strategy to become mission-critical? We will expand our power to reintermediate without diminishing our power to drive. What does it really mean to streamline "proactively"? Quick: do you have a synergistic plan for dealing with emerging ultra-ultra-viral R&D? We here at ABC understand that it is better to deliver compellingly than to reinvent compellingly. The affiliate-based convergence factor is magnetic. The portals factor can be summed up in one word: C2B2B. What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted term "impactful" really mean? If all of this seems astonishing to you, that's because it is! Our impactful feature set is unmatched, but our end-to-end R&D and newbie-proof use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Without preplanned media sourcing, networks are forced to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365. We will cultivate the term "end-to-end". Quick: do you have a interactive strategy for managing unplanned-for mindshare? What does the industry jargon "angel investors" really mean?