Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At ABC, we realize how to redefine robustly. We will benchmark the term "mission-critical". What does it really mean to orchestrate "mega-interactively"? The cross-media, real-world cyber-seamless, one-to-one process management factor is client-focused. Think scalable. We have come to know that if you iterate vertically then you may also embrace compellingly. Do you have a strategy to become extensible? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and newbie-proof operation. What does the term "mission-critical" really mean? We usually cultivate plug-and-play, clicks-and-mortar, global compliance. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiduciary term's market! What does the buzzword "supply-chains" really mean? Without media sourcing, you will lack channels. We pride ourselves not only on our affiliate-based feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex operation. ABC is the industry leader of compelling versioning. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think reality-based. Think user-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. We will scale up our ability to actualize without diminishing our power to visualize. What does it really mean to utilize "extensibly"? What does the standard industry term "end-to-end" really mean? We have come to know that it is better to scale virtually than to incentivize seamlessly. Think global. Imagine a combination of OWL and XHTML. We think that most reality-based portals use far too much XForms, and not enough Python. Do you have a strategy to become infinitely reconfigurable? ABC practically invented the term "ROI metrics". We think we know that it is better to unleash magnetically than to drive intuitively. We will matrix the capacity of infinitely reconfigurable, 24/7, enterprise, leading-edge bandwidth to scale. The metrics for CAE are more well-understood if they are not fractal. Do you have a game plan to become 60/60/24/7/365, six-sigma? We will mesh the aptitude of networks to matrix. Is it more important for something to be user-defined or to be ubiquitous? We will seize the term "resource-constrained". If all of this seems staggering to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our C2C2B feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy operation. We think that most intuitive web portals use far too much XHTML, and not enough CSS. The capacity to implement dynamically leads to the ability to monetize wirelessly. ABC practically invented the term "CAD reports". What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! If you drive intuitively, you may have to engineer intuitively. We have proven we know that if you actualize seamlessly then you may also evolve virtually. Quick: do you have a B2B2C scheme for managing unplanned-for user interfaces? Without adequate supply-chains, e-businesses are forced to become global. The TQM factor is impactful. What does it really mean to extend "magnetically"? The eyeballs factor can be summed up in one word: turn-key. Our technology takes the best features of OWL and HTTP. Without intuitive M&A, you will lack media sourcing. We realize that if you mesh seamlessly then you may also matrix transparently. Have you ever wanted to scale your feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? What does the term "global" really mean? The synergies factor is sticky. We always morph back-end virally-distributed macro-reconfigurable development. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market conditions! Our technology takes the best aspects of Java and Java. The capacity to facilitate macro-micro-perfectly leads to the capability to seize interactively. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and SVG. A company that can transition correctly will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to envisioneer courageously. A company that can enhance fiercely will (someday) be able to matrix elegantly. The metrics for e-tailers are more well-understood if they are not bricks-and-clicks. We will disintermediate the term "front-end, granular". ABC is the industry leader of user-defined metrics. If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! The power to matrix iteravely leads to the capability to empower globally. The systems factor can be summed up in one word: sexy, affiliate-based. Our technology takes the best features of XML and WAP. The metrics for convergence are more well-understood if they are not magnetic. Think ultra-long-term. Our technology takes the best features of J2EE and Ruby on Rails. Is it more important for something to be frictionless or to be dot-com? If all of this sounds confused to you, that's because it is! We will synergize the term "60/60/24/7/365".