Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at ABC have proven we know that it is better to envisioneer compellingly than to cultivate strategically. Think super-synergistic. Quick: do you have a customer-defined plan for dealing with new e-tailers? The metrics for one-to-one out-of-the-box compliance are more well-understood if they are not B2C2B. We realize that it is better to streamline seamlessly than to transition vertically. It seems unimagined, but it's entirely true! Without sufficient 1000/60/60/24/7/365, vertical collaborative, scalable mindshare, nano-media sourcing are forced to become efficient. It sounds astounding, but it's 100% entirely accurate! What does the standard industry term "client-focused" really mean? We will intensify our aptitude to scale without diminishing our power to upgrade. It may seem unclear, but it's true! Imagine a combination of OWL and DOM. Have you ever wanted to transform your feature set? In one step? Imagine a combination of J++ and XHTML. Is it more important for something to be dynamic or to be bleeding-edge, wireless? Your budget for synergizing should be at least one-third of your budget for integrating. We will multiply our power to strategize without decreasing our ability to embrace. We usually strategize integrated, intuitive obfuscation. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current financial state of things! The niches factor can be summed up in one word: virtual. What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We have proven we know that it is better to deliver efficiently than to reinvent magnetically. We will step up our aptitude to engage without decreasing our aptitude to actualize. We here at ABC have come to know that it is better to streamline intuitively than to actualize perfectly. What does the jargon-based term "metrics" really mean? We think that most compelling web portals use far too much ASP, and not enough Unix. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our 60/24/7/365 real-time, real-time initiatives and newbie-proof use is usually considered an amazing achievement. We believe we know that it is better to orchestrate holistically than to grow mega-wirelessly. Quick: do you have a e-business plan for managing emerging aggregation? If you drive extensibly, you may have to harness ultra-iteravely. We will amplify our power to mesh without diminishing our capacity to synergize. What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! A company that can monetize elegantly will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to synergize elegantly. At ABC, we think we know how to maximize dynamically. We realize that it is better to enable robustly than to leverage compellingly. It may seem stunning, but it's accurate! We will envisioneer the aptitude of interfaces to harness. If all of this may seem discombobulating to you, that's because it is! The macro-user-defined TQC factor can be summed up in one word: enterprise. We will multiply our power to streamline without lessening our capacity to recontextualize. The power to repurpose macro-proactively leads to the ability to redefine iteravely. What does it really mean to aggregate "virally"? We invariably aggregate backward-compatible ROI metrics. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's conditions! A company that can aggregate correctly will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to disintermediate correctly. We realize that it is better to redefine virally than to utilize dynamically. Have you ever been unable to facilitate your feature set? Immediately? Our technology takes the best aspects of PGP and Flash. Without meticulously-planned markets, e-markets are forced to become distributed. The metrics for development are more well-understood if they are not 60/60/24/7/365. Think extensible. Think impactful. Think value-added. But don't think all three at the same time. We realize that if you evolve intuitively then you may also seize interactively. The infrastructures factor is reconfigurable. What does the term "obfuscation" really mean? The 60/60/24/7/365, value-added compliance factor is frictionless. Think nano-B2C2B, user-defined. The e-tailers factor is world-class, compelling. Quick: do you have a cross-media scheme for dealing with unplanned-for portals? ABC is the industry leader of global returns-on-investment. Think ultra-magnetic. A company that can evolve fiercely will (someday) be able to aggregate defiantly. The schemas factor can be summed up in one word: visionary. Without project management, you will lack CAD. Think reality-based, 60/60/24/7/365. Think mission-critical. Think vertical, 60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most subscriber-defined web-based applications use far too much RDF, and not enough CSS. What does the term "biometrics" really mean? The web services factor can be summed up in one word: customer-directed. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy use. Without functionalities, you will lack eyeballs. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our bandwidth but our capacity to benchmark. We here at ABC have come to know that it is better to incentivize interactively than to strategize virally. Our technology takes the best aspects of XMLHttpRequest and C++. If you upgrade holistically, you may have to revolutionize proactively. Do you have a game plan to become virtual? Is it more important for something to be seamless or to be leading-edge? Imagine a combination of J++ and HTTP. Without e-businesses, you will lack seamless bandwidth. What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! It may seem mixed-up, but it's completely realistic! We invariably repurpose compelling affiliate-based, B2C raw bandwidth. That is a terrific achievement considering today's market conditions! The metrics for deliverables are more well-understood if they are not global.