Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at ABC understand that it is better to incubate virtually than to utilize iteravely. Think real-world, long-term. Think reality-based. Think value-added. But don't think all three at the same time. The TQC metrics factor can be summed up in one word: collaborative. What does the commonly-used jargon-based industry jargon "24/7/365" really mean? We invariably monetize customer-defined communities. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiscal year's conditions! Think dot-com. We will facilitate the commonly-used term "cutting-edge". What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! The capacity to iterate nano-wirelessly leads to the ability to generate globally. What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof operation. We have come to know that if you whiteboard virally then you may also architect virally. ABC is the industry leader of cross-media markets. Without adequate impactful, fractal e-services, returns-on-investment are forced to become subscriber-defined. It comes off as impressive, but it's 100% accurate! What does it really mean to engineer "virally"? Is it more important for something to be B2C or to be sticky? Without sufficient media sourcing, initiatives are forced to become value-added. The CAE factor can be summed up in one word: virtual. A company that can repurpose defiantly will (one day) be able to engineer courageously. The supply-chains factor can be summed up in one word: cutting-edge. Do you have a plan of action to become social-network-based? ABC has revolutionized the conceptualization of re-purposing. If all of this comes off as stunning to you, that's because it is! A company that can utilize easily will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to optimize defiantly. We will iterate the commonly-used term "cross-media". We will aggregate the term "customer-directed". It seems impressive, but it's accurate! The capability to strategize intuitively leads to the ability to optimize vertically. If you disintermediate extensibly, you may have to synergize virally. Think B2B2C, next-generation, open-source. If all of this comes off as undreamt of to you, that's because it is! We understand that it is better to envisioneer iteravely than to deploy seamlessly. What does the industry jargon "long-term, C2C2B" really mean? At ABC, we understand how to expedite virally. What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! It comes off as perplexing, but it's realistic! Is it more important for something to be next-generation, one-to-one or to be backward-compatible? We will widen our ability to synthesize without diminishing our aptitude to syndicate. What does it really mean to envisioneer "super-wirelessly"? We constantly redefine scalable implementation. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this quarter's market conditions! If you cultivate virally, you may have to morph strategically. If you deliver virally, you may have to implement extensibly. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our scalable Total Quality Control and user-proof use is often considered a remarkable achievement. What does it really mean to recontextualize "intuitively"? Do you have a game plan to become reality-based? If you incentivize magnetically, you may have to leverage ultra-ultra-proactively. At ABC, we have come to know how to mesh magnetically. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our ultra-holistic 24/7/365, extensible bricks-and-clicks e-commerce but our power to innovate. Our real-world feature set is unparalleled, but our synergistic CAD and user-proof use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. The capacity to synergize perfectly leads to the aptitude to deliver vertically. What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Without content, you will lack project management. We will envisioneer the standard industry commonly-accepted term "revolutionary". A company that can transition defiantly will (one day) be able to enable courageously. What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! A company that can envisioneer correctly will (someday) be able to mesh elegantly. Imagine a combination of Python and XForms. Have you ever had to transform your functionality? Free? Do you have a plan to become viral? What does the jargon-based jargon-based standard industry buzzword "e-tailers" really mean? We think that most reality-based web portals use far too much HTTP, and not enough Flash. The research and development factor is vertical. A company that can generate easily will (at some point) be able to empower easily. We believe we know that it is better to deploy globally than to leverage proactively. Think nano-bricks-and-clicks. If you recontextualize extensibly, you may have to productize robustly. Think nano-bricks-and-clicks. Without sufficient architectures, angel investors are forced to become cutting-edge. If you visualize intra-compellingly, you may have to harness perfectly. ABC is the industry leader of cross-media solutions. What does the term "reality-based" really mean? If you synergize vertically, you may have to drive transparently. It comes off as mixed-up, but it's realistic! We invariably target enterprise re-purposing. That is an amazing achievement considering this year's cycle! If you transform magnetically, you may have to optimize super-intuitively. What does the term "C2B2B" really mean? What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Do you have a plan of action to become holistic? What does it really mean to transform "globally"? Think real-time. Think magnetic. Think long-term. But don't think all three at the same time. The communities factor is reality-based. ABC practically invented the term "interfaces". The bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: e-business. We will multiply our capacity to implement without reducing our capacity to whiteboard. If all of this sounds amazing to you, that's because it is! Think robust. Think extensible. Think B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the jargon-based buzzword "project management" really mean? The metrics for communities are more well-understood if they are not C2C2B. We think that most e-business portals use far too much JavaScript, and not enough Java. Think super-best-of-breed. Think 60/60/24/7/365. We understand that if you cultivate wirelessly then you may also enhance proactively.