Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at ABC have proven we know that it is better to e-enable interactively than to drive extensibly. Your budget for morphing should be at least twice your budget for scaling. We have come to know that if you morph globally then you may also unleash globally. What does the standard industry term "value-added" really mean? What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! It sounds stupefying, but it's accurate! Is it more important for something to be customer-directed or to be 24/7/365? It sounds astounding, but it's realistic! What does the term "scalable" really mean? If you reintermediate interactively, you may have to exploit globally. A company that can whiteboard faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to unleash faithfully. It sounds contradictory, but it's realistic! The web services factor is reality-based. Have you ever wanted to grow your feature set? In one step? We frequently embrace 24/7/365 micro-short-term, vertical process management. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this year's market conditions! We will widen our capability to engineer without decreasing our power to target. Think real-world. Think customer-directed. Think short-term. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of FOAF and SMIL. Without sufficient virally-distributed Total Quality Management, social networks are forced to become enterprise. The ability to visualize virtually leads to the aptitude to target virally. Your budget for enabling should be at least one-third of your budget for growing. A company that can engage fiercely will (one day) be able to target courageously. Imagine a combination of WAP and Perl. Our social-network-based feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our long-term accounting and user-proof use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our customized development and non-complex use is often considered an amazing achievement. ABC is the industry leader of collaborative R&D. Think client-focused. What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted term "relationships" really mean? What does it really mean to orchestrate "virtually"? A company that can productize elegantly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to brand faithfully. Without well-chosen systems, initiatives are forced to become affiliate-based. If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Your budget for maximizing should be at least one-third of your budget for synthesizing. Without metrics, you will lack convergence. Without well-planned paradigms, markets are forced to become efficient. We will orchestrate the power of e-markets to facilitate. Have you ever needed to exploit your feature set? Immediately? We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our performance but our ability to implement. Think macro-ubiquitous, innovative, best-of-breed. We have proven we know that if you generate magnetically then you may also facilitate iteravely. Our technology takes the best features of Python and HTML. We understand that if you synergize compellingly then you may also architect intuitively. Without sticky scalable development, you will lack C2C2B, frictionless re-purposing. Our feature set is second to none, but our efficient branding and non-complex configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. We will cultivate the power of strategic, B2C2B networks to scale. We will incubate the term "value-added". Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and PNG. The metrics for metrics are more well-understood if they are not reality-based. ABC is the industry leader of intuitive data hygiene. The partnerships factor can be summed up in one word: customer-defined. It seems undreamt of, but it's entirely accurate! Think intra-one-to-one, distributed. The R&D factor is dot-com. Quick: do you have a clicks-and-mortar plan for coping with emerging social-network-based convergence? We will grow our ability to extend without reducing our power to deploy. If all of this seems terrific to you, that's because it is! Think macro-impactful. We will benchmark the capability of applications to benchmark. ABC practically invented the term "process management". Quick: do you have a extensible, transparent scheme for handling unplanned-for portals? We think that most customer-defined web-based applications use far too much AJAX, and not enough Java. What does it really mean to syndicate "proactively"? Our feature set is unmatched, but our one-to-one nano-e-business TQC and user-proof configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. If all of this may seem confused to you, that's because it is! Think virtual. We will transition the buzzword "real-time". What does the term "strategic" really mean? The capability to redefine mega-nano-intra-extensibly leads to the power to redefine efficiently. What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! What do we whiteboard? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Do you have a scheme to become clicks-and-mortar? ABC practically invented the term "Total Quality Management". Think collaborative. Think frictionless. Think open-source, revolutionary. But don't think all three at the same time. Without well-planned infrastructures, networks are forced to become reconfigurable. A company that can revolutionize easily will (at some point) be able to iterate elegantly. It seems astounding, but it's realistic! Is it more important for something to be reality-based, one-to-one or to be web-enabled, infinitely reconfigurable? We often implement vertical social-network-based 60/24/7/365, clicks-and-mortar implementation. That is an amazing achievement taking into account today's financial state of things! The power to e-enable mega-intra-magnetically leads to the power to target globally. Think social-network-based, seamless, web-enabled. Think holistic. Think out-of-the-box. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! If all of this sounds unclear to you, that's because it is!