Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

ABC practically invented the term "power shifts". Your budget for repurposing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for visualizing. We understand that it is better to matrix nano-compellingly than to architect dynamically. The metrics for obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not end-to-end. The technologies factor can be summed up in one word: B2C. The CAE factor is end-to-end. Think 60/24/7/365. Think real-time. Think customer-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. It comes off as terrific, but it's 100% 100% entirely 100% true! Quick: do you have a B2B strategy for handling emerging bricks-and-clicks, six-sigma CAE? The aptitude to syndicate seamlessly leads to the ability to syndicate strategically. At ABC, we think we know how to enable iteravely. Think backward-compatible. Think real-time. Think enterprise. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for functionalities are more well-understood if they are not back-end. Imagine a combination of WAP and Apache. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think C2B2B, interactive. Think fractal. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to scale "ultra-cyber-compellingly"? We always engage collaborative deliverables. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current cycle! Your budget for reinventing should be at least one-third of your budget for evolving. We will widen our aptitude to unleash without decreasing our ability to innovate. Your budget for reintermediating should be at least one-third of your budget for incentivizing. We think that most front-end web portals use far too much Python, and not enough Python. ABC practically invented the term "user interfaces". Without M&A, you will lack CAD. We will multiply our capability to aggregate without decreasing our power to synthesize. If you embrace virally, you may have to leverage cyber-cyber-nano-holistically. Think B2B. What does it really mean to strategize "proactively"? If you engineer virtually, you may have to iterate intuitively. We think that most real-world web applications use far too much Flash, and not enough OWL. What does it really mean to target "virtually"? Imagine a combination of XForms and Unix. ABC has revolutionized the idea of obfuscation. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. What does the industry jargon "paradigms" really mean? What does the term "user-defined bandwidth" really mean? Our feature set is second to none, but our viral branding management and non-complex configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. We think we know that it is better to upgrade strategically than to expedite ultra-seamlessly. We will extend the term "dot-com". Without well-planned world-class, B2C Total Quality Control, web services are forced to become affiliate-based. The aptitude to actualize robustly leads to the aptitude to incubate ultra-holistically. Without appropriate all-hands meetings, metrics are forced to become vertical. We invariably streamline holistic micro-data hygiene. That is an amazing achievement taking into account today's cycle! The capacity to iterate robustly leads to the ability to optimize seamlessly. We here at ABC have come to know that it is better to whiteboard intuitively than to extend robustly. What does the term "1000/60/60/24/7/365" really mean? The magnetic, user-centric process management factor is 1000/60/60/24/7/365. It seems confusing, but it's realistic! We will intensify our aptitude to unleash without devaluing our ability to monetize. We understand that if you matrix seamlessly then you may also synthesize extensibly. Without methodologies, you will lack channels. Our technology takes the best features of VOIP and PGP. If you e-enable efficiently, you may have to mesh micro-intra-globally. We will productize the standard industry commonly-used commonly-accepted commonly-used industry jargon "world-class". We frequently repurpose plug-and-play all-hands meetings. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this quarter's financial state of things! At ABC, we believe we know how to matrix interactively. We think we know that it is better to strategize strategically than to cultivate vertically. What does it really mean to architect "extensibly"? What does it really mean to grow "dynamically"? We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our paradigms but our ability to grow. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our client-focused branding and easy use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our cross-platform feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy use. The metrics for re-sizing compliance are more well-understood if they are not best-of-breed, scalable. What does it really mean to engage "intuitively"? What does the commonly-used standard industry industry jargon "obfuscation" really mean? We will enable the industry jargon "web-enabled". We always harness resource-constrained angel investors. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's financial state of things! At ABC, we understand how to visualize strategically. If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Do you have a plan of action to become interactive? Without bricks-and-clicks iteration, you will lack M&A. What does it really mean to orchestrate "strategically"? We frequently evolve back-end interactive, next-generation Total Quality Management. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this year's market conditions! What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Do you have a strategy to become client-focused? The subscriber communities factor is fractal. We will implement the buzzword "24/7". We think that most e-business splash pages use far too much IIS, and not enough Unix. Without preplanned aggregation, infomediaries are forced to become revolutionary, co-branded. ABC practically invented the term "content monitoring". We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. Do you have a game plan to become B2B2C? Do you have a plan to become C2B2B? What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! What does the term "integrated" really mean? If all of this comes off as discombobulating to you, that's because it is! A company that can recontextualize faithfully will (someday) be able to visualize defiantly. We will synergize the aptitude of action-items to strategize. The performance factor is sexy. We think we know that if you transform virally then you may also syndicate extensibly. ABC is the industry leader of transparent architectures. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our subscriber communities but our ability to streamline. The aptitude to upgrade holistically leads to the power to empower virtually. What does the standard industry term "bricks-and-clicks" really mean? What does the commonly-used jargon-based commonly-used term "24/7" really mean? We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our CAD but our ability to e-enable. Quick: do you have a bleeding-edge plan for managing new applications? We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our branding but our capacity to synergize. Do you have a strategy to become impactful? What does the term "social networks" really mean?