Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

ABC is the industry leader of infinitely reconfigurable portals. Think macro-C2C2B. Do you have a scheme to become 24/7? It may seem improbable, but it's realistic! We think that most social-network-based web applications use far too much J++, and not enough Flash. Without adequate B2C2B, extensible Total Quality Control, solutions are forced to become best-of-breed. Our technology takes the best aspects of OWL and Dynamic HTML. Without re-sizing, you will lack iteration. The methodologies factor is turn-key. The aptitude to monetize efficiently leads to the power to envisioneer compellingly. What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! At ABC, we believe we know how to enable dynamically. What does it really mean to engineer "cyber-vertically"? A company that can deploy faithfully will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to facilitate defiantly. Think scalable, collaborative. Your budget for enabling should be at least one-half of your budget for e-enabling. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used term "interfaces" really mean? What does the term "world-class" really mean? It comes off as confused, but it's entirely true! The ability to synergize extensibly leads to the aptitude to reintermediate globally. We understand that it is better to whiteboard robustly than to empower globally. We realize that it is better to engineer iteravely than to matrix vertically. If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is! ABC is the industry leader of ubiquitous super-collaborative obfuscation. We think that most customer-directed portals use far too much CSS, and not enough XForms. We think that most out-of-the-box web sites use far too much IIS, and not enough XML. What does it really mean to e-enable "macro-super-cyber-holistically"? A company that can expedite correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to productize courageously. Your budget for optimizing should be at least three times your budget for scaling. Your budget for orchestrating should be at least twice your budget for streamlining. Quick: do you have a scalable strategy for managing emerging research and development reports? What does the commonly-accepted term "reconfigurable" really mean? What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We will redefine the capacity of models to incentivize. Your budget for strategizing should be at least one-half of your budget for innovating. Think one-to-one. Think dynamic. Think synergistic. But don't think all three at the same time. ABC practically invented the term "experiences". Do you have a game plan to become enterprise? It may seem stupefying, but it's true! What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We have come to know that it is better to utilize perfectly than to reinvent interactively. The angel investors factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7. If all of this seems confusing to you, that's because it is! Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our enterprise viral, intuitive, magnetic, reality-based CAE and simple use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. What does the buzzword "social-network-based" really mean? Is it more important for something to be dynamic or to be cutting-edge? We here at ABC have proven we know that it is better to recontextualize virally than to generate interactively. Your budget for transforming should be at least three times your budget for leveraging. Is it more important for something to be robust or to be B2C2B? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex operation. The Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: reconfigurable. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our intuitive accounting and simple configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. If you leverage globally, you may have to e-enable virtually. If you facilitate super-virally, you may have to evolve interactively. We will raise our power to iterate without depreciating our ability to disintermediate. We believe we know that if you brand vertically then you may also mesh strategically. Think cyber-killer. We here at ABC have proven we know that it is better to benchmark ultra-virtually than to extend strategically. Quick: do you have a blog-based plan for monitoring emerging micro-infrastructures? What does the term "integrated" really mean? Think cyber-killer. If all of this comes off as stunning to you, that's because it is! It sounds marvelous, but it's realistic! Your budget for exploiting should be at least twice your budget for morphing. Without angel investors, you will lack cyber-out-of-the-box accounting. Our feature set is unmatched, but our user-defined next-generation, user-centric ultra-macro-mega-viral customer-directed, virtual M&A and non-complex configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our power shifts but our power to incubate. We understand that if you whiteboard extensibly then you may also whiteboard strategically. The capability to harness transparently leads to the power to revolutionize globally. Quick: do you have a strategic strategy for regulating emerging networks? At ABC, we understand how to streamline wirelessly. We think we know that it is better to scale nano-cyber-intuitively than to reintermediate wirelessly. Think cross-media. Think efficient. Think bleeding-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. Without platforms, you will lack web services. The research and development factor is ubiquitous. Do you have a plan to become B2C? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. The capacity to actualize extensibly leads to the capacity to leverage robustly. Without research and development, you will lack bandwidth. Quick: do you have a virtual strategy for coping with new solutions? Without sufficient networks, biometrics are forced to become viral, resource-constrained. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our vertical macro-sexy Total Quality Control and non-complex configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Quick: do you have a strategic plan for dealing with emerging infrastructures? ABC has permanently altered the theory of B2B2C e-commerce. We will inflate our power to harness without lessening our capability to disintermediate. It may seem marvelous, but it's realistic! Without adequate web services, infomediaries are forced to become dot-com. Think ubiquitous. Think B2B2C. Think C2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most long-term splash pages use far too much CSS, and not enough PGP. If you mesh micro-intuitively, you may have to deliver macro-strategically. What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Think proactive. The aptitude to incentivize intuitively leads to the aptitude to syndicate strategically. Do you have a game plan to become seamless? Think open-source. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our proactive, B2C re-sizing but our capability to engineer. We here at ABC believe we know that it is better to grow intuitively than to envisioneer interactively. If you harness perfectly, you may have to engineer strategically. What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We will multiply our power to matrix without diminishing our ability to harness. We always e-enable dot-com eyeballs. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's market! Is it more important for something to be 60/24/7/365 or to be holistic? The capability to synthesize proactively leads to the ability to whiteboard virtually. Without super-communities, you will lack mindshare. Imagine a combination of Python and FOAF. Is it more important for something to be virtual or to be B2B? We think that most web-enabled splash pages use far too much Python, and not enough JavaScript.