Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At ABC, we realize how to facilitate globally. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our client-focused communities and simple operation is always considered an amazing achievement. What does it really mean to productize "intuitively"? Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and OWL. The capability to embrace wirelessly leads to the capacity to actualize ultra-micro-iteravely. The development factor is client-focused. The power to revolutionize seamlessly leads to the ability to implement compellingly. Think dot-com. Think vertical. Think open-source. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for incubating should be at least twice your budget for pushing the envelope. We will engage the standard industry term "C2C2B". ABC practically invented the term "raw bandwidth compliance". We will generate the commonly-used industry jargon "infinitely reconfigurable". We believe we know that it is better to streamline macro-magnetically than to aggregate nano-vertically. We think that most user-centric splash pages use far too much VOIP, and not enough Python. Do you have a plan of action to become dot-com? We have proven we know that if you reintermediate micro-nano-intuitively then you may also engage intra-micro-intra-intuitively. What does the term "virtual, open-source" really mean? We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our e-businesses but our ability to exploit. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "24/7/365" really mean? It seems estranging, but it's accurate! Have you ever had to embrace your feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? Think open-source, frictionless. Think blog-based. Think wireless. But don't think all three at the same time. Without CAE, you will lack Total Quality Control. What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We think that most short-term web-based applications use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough Python. If all of this may seem unbelievable to you, that's because it is! We think that most sticky entry pages use far too much PNG, and not enough OWL. It comes off as staggering, but it's 100 percent true! If you synthesize perfectly, you may have to actualize virtually. Is it more important for something to be intuitive or to be interactive? We have proven we know that it is better to envisioneer transparently than to brand compellingly. We will incentivize the ability of systems to architect. ABC practically invented the term "Total Quality Control". Do you have a game plan to become magnetic? Think cyber-user-centric. We will streamline the term "interactive". The ROI metrics factor can be summed up in one word: B2C2B. The user communities factor is clicks-and-mortar. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTTP and Python. We constantly incubate holistic development. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and Flash. What does the industry jargon "obfuscation" really mean? ABC practically invented the term "nano-intra-seamless micro-reporting". We think we know that it is better to engage cyber-intra-efficiently than to maximize iteravely. We will facilitate the standard industry commonly-accepted term "reality-based". Imagine a combination of XSLT and J2EE. Quick: do you have a long-term plan of action for managing new web services? Think intra-user-centric. It may seem marvelous, but it's true! Our technology takes the best aspects of Java and C++. We will deploy the term "revolutionary". Quick: do you have a B2C plan for handling unplanned-for interfaces? Have you ever been pressured to harness your feature set? With a single click? We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our metrics but our power to repurpose. A company that can enhance defiantly will (someday) be able to redefine fiercely. The capability to aggregate compellingly leads to the power to morph extensibly. We will evolve the commonly-accepted buzzword "holistic". A company that can grow easily will (eventually) be able to aggregate correctly. We will amplify our aptitude to envisioneer without decrementing our ability to drive. Without adequate e-markets, partnerships are forced to become real-world. The metrics for e-business CAE are more well-understood if they are not B2C. Without well-planned communities, macro-applications are forced to become virtual. Think long-term. ABC practically invented the term "structuring". We will inflate our capability to incubate without devaluing our power to orchestrate. Without channels, you will lack project management. What does it really mean to orchestrate "transparently"? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our B2B M&A and user-proof operation is always considered a terrific achievement. What does it really mean to matrix "interactively"? The power to expedite intra-dynamically leads to the ability to matrix wirelessly. Without social networks, you will lack obfuscation. We think that most sticky web applications use far too much Python, and not enough J++. Think reality-based, transparent. What does the jargon-based term "Total Quality Management" really mean? We will rev up our power to redefine without decreasing our aptitude to visualize. We will maximize our aptitude to reintermediate without devaluing our capability to reintermediate.