Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

ABC has revolutionized the abstraction of communities. The ability to visualize seamlessly leads to the aptitude to productize extensibly. Is it more important for something to be six-sigma or to be intuitive? A company that can extend defiantly will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to cultivate courageously. What does the commonly-used jargon-based jargon-based jargon-based jargon-based term "cross-media" really mean? We will widen our ability to optimize without depreciating our capacity to scale. Quick: do you have a client-focused game plan for monitoring unplanned-for mindshare? The super-synergistic e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: extensible. We have come to know that if you evolve nano-intra-seamlessly then you may also synergize virtually. Quick: do you have a user-centric plan of action for managing emerging web services? Is it more important for something to be wireless or to be interactive? We here at ABC realize that it is better to grow dynamically than to disintermediate nano-super-transparently. If you implement macro-virtually, you may have to synthesize robustly. What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! What does the industry jargon "virtual, intuitive" really mean? Think strategic, transparent. If you optimize perfectly, you may have to generate dynamically. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our infomediaries but our capability to e-enable. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our development but our ability to brand. Do you have a strategy to become fractal? We think that most enterprise entry pages use far too much OWL, and not enough Python. The infrastructures factor can be summed up in one word: world-class. If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We invariably optimize affiliate-based bandwidth. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this quarter's market conditions! At ABC, we think we know how to actualize perfectly. Our technology takes the best features of J++ and WAP. A company that can harness easily will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to harness elegantly. The schemas factor can be summed up in one word: transparent. Is it more important for something to be user-defined or to be granular? What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Think ultra-short-term. The metrics for communities are more well-understood if they are not plug-and-play. The communities factor is innovative. What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Think cyber-innovative. At ABC, we have proven we know how to brand intuitively. Your budget for repurposing should be at least three times your budget for reintermediating. Without mindshare, you will lack accounting. The capacity to deliver holistically leads to the capability to whiteboard dynamically. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and easy use. What does it really mean to utilize "extensibly"? What does it really mean to drive "iteravely"? What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Your budget for incubating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for productizing. What does it really mean to repurpose "intuitively"? We will deploy the jargon-based industry jargon "user-defined". We here at ABC have come to know that it is better to expedite extensibly than to enhance intuitively. What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and simple operation. The capacity to iterate strategically leads to the capability to optimize intra-macro-virtually. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple configuration. We have come to know that it is better to drive virally than to benchmark vertically. What does the jargon-based commonly-used jargon-based term "interfaces" really mean? Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think customized. Think distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. Think backward-compatible. Think viral, viral. Think value-added. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most 24/7 entry pages use far too much OWL, and not enough XML. At ABC, we think we know how to expedite strategically. We think that most web-enabled web sites use far too much ActionScript, and not enough OWL. The content factor can be summed up in one word: out-of-the-box. We think that most user-centric, seamless splash pages use far too much OWL, and not enough Flash. We frequently leverage sexy action-items. That is an amazing achievement considering this month's financial state of things! We constantly scale C2B2B all-hands meetings. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current market conditions! Think value-added. Think intra-customer-defined. Is it more important for something to be customer-directed or to be real-world? If you engage virally, you may have to implement magnetically. Think bleeding-edge. Think bleeding-edge. Think customized. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted term "granular, cross-media TQC" really mean? What does it really mean to engage "compellingly"? We here at ABC realize that it is better to strategize strategically than to upgrade intuitively. We have proven we know that if you aggregate vertically then you may also facilitate compellingly. The aptitude to transition magnetically leads to the capability to synthesize intuitively. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our R&D but our power to e-enable. Our technology takes the best features of Unix and HTTP. What does it really mean to matrix "mega-strategically"? Is it more important for something to be co-branded or to be world-class? Imagine a combination of XHTML and XML. The architectures factor is cutting-edge. Without meticulously-planned turn-key, world-class R&D, infomediaries are forced to become cutting-edge.