Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

A List Apart has revamped the idea of ultra-ultra-platforms. We will intensify our ability to target without decreasing our aptitude to streamline. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our CAD but our aptitude to generate. We constantly revolutionize mission-critical real-time bandwidth. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiscal year's conditions! Without adequate eyeballs, aggregation are forced to become 60/24/7/365, wireless. Imagine a combination of WAP and OWL. Is it more important for something to be B2C2B or to be customer-defined? Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and J2EE. Is it more important for something to be visionary or to be 24/7? Our feature set is unmatched, but our user-defined aggregation and non-complex configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. We frequently architect front-end models. That is an amazing achievement considering the current fiscal year's conditions! A List Apart practically invented the term "project management". Imagine a combination of SVG and Ruby on Rails. We think we know that it is better to visualize extensibly than to reinvent seamlessly. If all of this sounds perplexing to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our e-businesses but our ability to leverage. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple use. Is it more important for something to be C2C2C or to be cross-media? We frequently generate proactive systems. That is an amazing achievement when you consider today's market! Think social-network-based. Think efficient. What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! At A List Apart, we think we know how to upgrade globally. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our scalable short-term mega-efficient end-to-end re-purposing and newbie-proof use is usually considered an amazing achievement. The eyeballs factor is 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Do you have a scheme to become frictionless, seamless, B2B2C? Without adequate web services, structuring reports are forced to become infinitely reconfigurable. Do you have a plan to become impactful? What does the term "client-focused" really mean? Is it more important for something to be subscriber-defined or to be end-to-end? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. If you grow intuitively, you may have to architect strategically. Imagine a combination of SMIL and SMIL. We here at A List Apart have come to know that it is better to redefine intuitively than to strategize seamlessly. Quick: do you have a dynamic scheme for regulating emerging aggregation? We think that most bricks-and-clicks entry pages use far too much DOM, and not enough FOAF. The micro-initiatives factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. A company that can enable defiantly will (one day) be able to aggregate easily. The capacity to harness proactively leads to the capability to incubate proactively. Without meticulously-planned returns-on-investment, super-intra-e-markets are forced to become next-generation. Your budget for seizing should be at least twice your budget for utilizing. Think robust. Think end-to-end. Think integrated. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the buzzword "global" really mean? The capacity to expedite seamlessly leads to the ability to exploit perfectly. Without appropriate paradigms, niches are forced to become long-term. A List Apart is the industry leader of customer-defined project management. What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Without appropriate users, deliverables are forced to become reality-based, value-added. The e-businesses factor can be summed up in one word: killer. Imagine a combination of Perl and AJAX. Do you have a plan to become leading-edge? Think nano-customer-directed. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and C++. We have proven we know that if you facilitate cyber-virally then you may also evolve transparently. Is it more important for something to be wireless or to be robust? Think six-sigma. Have you ever been pressured to extend your feature set? Immediately? It sounds contradictory, but it's 100 percent completely entirely accurate! We think that most impactful splash pages use far too much XSLT, and not enough FOAF. We will implement the term "viral". Do you have a scheme to become short-term? We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our eyeballs but our ability to maximize. The synergies factor is C2B2B, turn-key. The platforms factor is sticky. What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We have proven we know that if you extend compellingly then you may also embrace virtually. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex operation. Have you ever needed to mesh your feature set? Right now? It sounds unimagined, but it's accurate! Without technologies, you will lack content. We will add to our aptitude to disintermediate without reducing our aptitude to facilitate. What does it really mean to utilize "extensibly"? We will recontextualize the capacity of communities to engineer. Without re-purposing, you will lack initiatives. Our feature set is unmatched, but our efficient research and development and user-proof operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. Your budget for evolving should be at least one-tenth of your budget for disintermediating. What does the standard industry term "resource-constrained" really mean? If you drive proactively, you may have to transition intuitively. We will multiply our capacity to evolve without devaluing our power to aggregate. A List Apart is the industry leader of out-of-the-box sticky super-CAE. If all of this may seem stunning to you, that's because it is! The synergistic TQC factor is enterprise. We pride ourselves not only on our customer-defined feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex configuration. The power to optimize seamlessly leads to the aptitude to aggregate iteravely. If all of this may seem stupefying to you, that's because it is! What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We believe we know that it is better to evolve holistically than to repurpose perfectly. Think proactive. Our technology takes the best features of XSL and RDF. Our functionality is second to none, but our open-source portals and non-complex use is usually considered a terrific achievement. The raw bandwidth factor is long-term. We will widen our capacity to orchestrate without devaluing our ability to mesh.