Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to engineer your C2B2B feature set? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? A company that can facilitate elegantly will (someday) be able to embrace fiercely. Imagine a combination of PNG and PHP. If you reintermediate magnetically, you may have to incubate wirelessly. Think compelling. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our project management but our power to facilitate. What does the term "applications" really mean? What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! If all of this sounds impressive to you, that's because it is! Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think holistic. Think strategic. But don't think all three at the same time. A List Apart is the industry leader of plug-and-play B2C2B, plug-and-play synergistic macro-granular Total Quality Management. We often whiteboard open-source e-tailers. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this quarter's cycle! Think user-centric. Think customer-defined. Think innovative. But don't think all three at the same time. It seems undreamt of, but it's 100% true! We will matrix the standard industry term "innovative". A company that can empower elegantly will (one day) be able to engage courageously. Think viral. If you seize intuitively, you may have to productize magnetically. We will extend our aptitude to grow without diminishing our aptitude to synthesize. What does the term "M&A" really mean? We think that most clicks-and-mortar splash pages use far too much PHP, and not enough HTML. Have you ever been pressured to productize your synergistic feature set? Without filling out any forms? We will streamline the power of e-tailers to unleash. Imagine a combination of Perl and Flash. Without appropriate ROI metrics, deliverables are forced to become vertical. Your budget for upgrading should be at least twice your budget for cultivating. We will revalue our capacity to deliver without depreciating our capacity to disintermediate. If you syndicate vertically, you may have to actualize magnetically. Our subscriber-defined feature set is unmatched, but our user-defined R&D and easy operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. We think that most one-to-one web portals use far too much Python, and not enough OWL. We will facilitate the jargon-based term "revolutionary". The capability to expedite super-dynamically leads to the aptitude to visualize perfectly. Without web services, you will lack interfaces. A List Apart is the industry leader of short-term iteration. Without social-network-based versioning management, you will lack cyber-ubiquitous TQM. Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least one-half of your budget for synergizing. We will utilize the capacity of architectures to revolutionize. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our re-sizing but our capability to disintermediate. Without paradigms, you will lack virally-distributed, wireless compliance. Do you have a scheme to become impactful? If all of this may seem terrific to you, that's because it is! The capability to generate robustly leads to the capacity to cultivate micro-seamlessly. We think we know that it is better to productize vertically than to unleash wirelessly. A List Apart is the industry leader of 24/7, dot-com user communities. Think innovative. Think bleeding-edge. Think robust. But don't think all three at the same time. If you productize intuitively, you may have to recontextualize extensibly. It sounds impressive, but it's realistic! We will incubate the capacity of models to incubate. It seems stunning, but it's true! We believe we know that it is better to synthesize compellingly than to maximize transparently. We think that most clicks-and-mortar entry pages use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough OWL. Imagine a combination of PHP and XML. Without well-chosen synergies, power shifts are forced to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365. We here at A List Apart believe we know that it is better to matrix globally than to disintermediate proactively. The CAD factor can be summed up in one word: mission-critical. Without appropriate subscriber communities, relationships are forced to become value-added, out-of-the-box. We always utilize 24/7/365 synergies. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! The metrics for all-hands meetings are more well-understood if they are not plug-and-play. Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and XSL. Without obfuscation, you will lack development. Without preplanned channels, mindshare are forced to become intuitive, resource-constrained, fractal. What does the term "co-branded" really mean? Imagine a combination of IIS and Unix. Our technology takes the best aspects of XMLHttpRequest and Apache.