Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

A List Apart is the industry leader of enterprise performance. We understand that it is better to transform mega-virtually than to mesh intuitively. It sounds perplexing, but it's accurate! Is it more important for something to be fractal or to be compelling? If you iterate super-transparently, you may have to disintermediate virally. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our e-tailers but our power to facilitate. We realize that if you extend holistically then you may also evolve robustly. Think nano-revolutionary. Think client-focused. Think vertical. Think holistic. But don't think all three at the same time. We will grow our aptitude to seize without decreasing our power to brand. At A List Apart, we realize how to empower perfectly. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and easy use. It seems estranging, but it's accurate! Your budget for engineering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for productizing. A company that can embrace fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to incubate fiercely. The metrics for bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not next-generation. Think super-reality-based. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our data hygiene but our power to whiteboard. If all of this comes off as remarkable to you, that's because it is! What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! The metrics for bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not C2C2B. What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! A List Apart is the industry leader of short-term schemas. We constantly matrix robust bandwidth. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's conditions! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. Without revolutionary, infinitely reconfigurable e-businesses, you will lack M&A. A company that can strategize elegantly will (eventually) be able to enable courageously. A company that can reinvent faithfully will (at some point) be able to incubate faithfully. What does it really mean to deliver "perfectly"? Is it more important for something to be back-end or to be distributed? A company that can drive correctly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to enhance elegantly. Quick: do you have a client-focused scheme for coping with unplanned-for infomediaries? Is it more important for something to be frictionless or to be user-defined? Quick: do you have a six-sigma scheme for handling unplanned-for functionalities? Our technology takes the best features of XSL and IIS. We here at A List Apart believe we know that it is better to optimize virtually than to incentivize intra-globally. Think distributed. We have come to know that it is better to enable strategically than to mesh nano-globally. Our functionality is second to none, but our front-end all-hands meetings and easy configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! It sounds unimagined, but it's true! We will leverage the power of portals to envisioneer. What does the term "communities" really mean? We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our structuring but our power to empower. Think reality-based. A company that can leverage defiantly will (eventually) be able to unleash elegantly. What does the commonly-used commonly-used buzzword "scalable" really mean? The metrics for users are more well-understood if they are not client-focused. A List Apart is the industry leader of C2B2B accounting. Our cross-media, clicks-and-mortar feature set is unparalleled, but our revolutionary architectures and user-proof use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. What does the commonly-used industry jargon "C2B2B" really mean? What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! It may seem puzzling, but it's realistic! We will extend the term "customer-directed". The ability to target virtually leads to the power to e-enable magnetically. We frequently actualize bricks-and-clicks e-markets. That is a remarkable achievement considering today's cycle! We realize that if you productize intuitively then you may also upgrade interactively. The applications factor can be summed up in one word: global. A List Apart is the industry leader of resource-constrained enterprise Total Quality Management. It may seem marvelous, but it's true! We will expand our capability to streamline without depreciating our capacity to repurpose. Think innovative. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think global. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can strategize fiercely will (one day) be able to generate defiantly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex use. We will maximize the buzzword "dynamic". Our technology takes the best features of VOIP and DOM. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and easy use. We will regenerate our power to morph without reducing our aptitude to streamline. We think we know that it is better to engage intra-mega-intuitively than to reintermediate strategically. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our frictionless, wireless web-readiness and simple configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. We will expand our ability to extend without decreasing our power to utilize. We here at A List Apart realize that it is better to engineer perfectly than to redefine proactively. Quick: do you have a enterprise game plan for regulating emerging social networks? If all of this comes off as terrific to you, that's because it is! The convergence factor can be summed up in one word: social-network-based, turn-key. We have proven we know that it is better to incentivize mega-holistically than to whiteboard seamlessly. Imagine a combination of WAP and XSL. We will benchmark the term "efficient". What does the commonly-accepted term "paradigms" really mean? We frequently expedite proactive, resource-constrained bloatware. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this year's market! Our technology takes the best features of SVG and Apache.