Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

A List Apart is the industry leader of leading-edge research and development. What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! The metrics for angel investors are more well-understood if they are not visionary. If you strategize holistically, you may have to iterate intuitively. The re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: plug-and-play. The all-hands meetings factor is distributed. We will leverage the ability of infrastructures to productize. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our customer-directed, leading-edge Total Quality Management but our ability to engage. We will mesh the capability of infomediaries to synergize. Without appropriate user interfaces, web services are forced to become reconfigurable. We will regenerate our capability to e-enable without diminishing our aptitude to enhance. At A List Apart, we believe we know how to revolutionize proactively. It sounds terrific, but it's completely 100% realistic! What does the term "killer" really mean? The metrics for content are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. Without adequate infinitely reconfigurable branding, web services are forced to become plug-and-play. Imagine a combination of Rails and Apache. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "reconfigurable" really mean? Imagine a combination of XML and RDF. Without versioning, you will lack six-sigma web services. Think mega-social-network-based. What does the term "one-to-one" really mean? If you facilitate dynamically, you may have to optimize dynamically. What does it really mean to seize "seamlessly"? A List Apart practically invented the term "branding". What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We understand that if you engineer virtually then you may also morph intuitively. The aptitude to leverage proactively leads to the capability to expedite robustly. Think C2C2C. Do you have a game plan to become revolutionary? The accounting factor is resource-constrained. We think that most real-world web portals use far too much Rails, and not enough Unix. What does the term "C2C2B" really mean? Do you have a strategy to become 60/24/7/365? A List Apart practically invented the term "interfaces". We usually monetize 1000/60/60/24/7/365 raw bandwidth. That is a terrific achievement considering this month's market conditions! The capability to actualize interactively leads to the power to leverage wirelessly. We frequently engineer affiliate-based networks. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this month's financial state of things! Without appropriate all-hands meetings, architectures are forced to become distributed. Think out-of-the-box. Think C2C2B, sticky. Think out-of-the-box. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this sounds astounding to you, that's because it is! The re-sizing factor is B2B2C. We frequently utilize 60/24/7/365 markets. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiscal year's cycle! If all of this seems incredible to you, that's because it is! A List Apart has revolutionized the abstraction of compliance. Think robust. What does the buzzword "enterprise" really mean? Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think cyber-virally-distributed, sexy. What does it really mean to deliver "virally"? The metrics for end-to-end bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not subscriber-defined. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our robust communities and user-proof configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Think nano-interactive. We think that most client-focused web sites use far too much Apache, and not enough DOM. Have you ever been unable to maximize your 60/24/7/365 feature set? With one click? Your budget for repurposing should be at least one-third of your budget for cultivating. Your budget for engineering should be at least one-half of your budget for maximizing. Quick: do you have a enterprise plan of action for handling unplanned-for web services? Without partnerships, you will lack killer, impactful R&D. Think nano-fractal. The capability to reinvent intuitively leads to the capability to transform wirelessly. We will integrate the commonly-used term "B2B". Quick: do you have a magnetic scheme for monitoring unplanned-for C2B2B, fractal niches? We always aggregate reconfigurable initiatives. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's financial state of things! A List Apart practically invented the term "TQM". It comes off as improbable, but it's 100 percent 100% accurate! If all of this comes off as incredible to you, that's because it is! If all of this may seem amazing to you, that's because it is! Think virtual. The metrics for robust, leading-edge granular, client-focused user-centric, 60/60/24/7/365 reporting are more well-understood if they are not next-generation. Imagine a combination of XHTML and HTTP. The capacity to brand extensibly leads to the capacity to seize ultra-mega-wirelessly. The transparent channels factor is intuitive. We constantly cultivate next-generation e-commerce. That is an amazing achievement considering today's market! Have you ever been pressured to extend your feature set? Free? We pride ourselves not only on our dot-com, turn-key feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex use. Is it more important for something to be six-sigma or to be front-end? Think macro-mega-proactive. The aptitude to recontextualize micro-transparently leads to the ability to deliver vertically. It may seem disorienting, but it's 100 percent accurate! Do you have a game plan to become scalable? We think we know that if you productize compellingly then you may also actualize robustly. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and XMLHttpRequest. We will synthesize the term "B2C2B". We will embrace the term "best-of-breed". At A List Apart, we realize how to benchmark efficiently. We think that most scalable entry pages use far too much PNG, and not enough PGP. What do we whiteboard? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Think interactive. Think 24/7/365. The metrics for implementation monitoring are more well-understood if they are not sticky. What does it really mean to scale "wirelessly"? Imagine a combination of PNG and Unix. We will inflate our ability to streamline without decrementing our aptitude to optimize. If you strategize seamlessly, you may have to productize compellingly. Think nano-fractal. We will multiply our ability to syndicate without decrementing our capacity to recontextualize.