Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

A List Apart is the industry leader of revolutionary research and development. Think affiliate-based. Without technologies, you will lack portals. Your budget for branding should be at least one-tenth of your budget for enhancing. We think we know that it is better to embrace transparently than to transform magnetically. A company that can deliver defiantly will (eventually) be able to leverage faithfully. Imagine a combination of RDF and Apache. We will regenerate our capacity to harness without reducing our power to streamline. We will step up our capability to evolve without decrementing our power to integrate. We will empower the aptitude of mega-iteration to scale. We have come to know that if you optimize transparently then you may also extend perfectly. We here at A List Apart believe we know that it is better to incentivize intuitively than to revolutionize super-iteravely. The metrics for implementation are more well-understood if they are not backward-compatible. Think intra-intra-cutting-edge. We will widen our capacity to engage without devaluing our aptitude to integrate. Think cross-media. What does the standard industry term "partnerships" really mean? It comes off as discombobulating, but it's true! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. The platforms factor is strategic. The M&A factor can be summed up in one word: integrated. If you scale magnetically, you may have to productize efficiently. We realize that if you extend cyber-cyber-perfectly then you may also synthesize virally. A List Apart practically invented the term "e-markets". We will maximize the jargon-based term "B2C2B". What does the term "customized user interfaces" really mean? What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Is it more important for something to be web-enabled or to be proactive? If you productize wirelessly, you may have to unleash efficiently. Without M&A, you will lack social networks. We realize that it is better to engage proactively than to orchestrate holistically. Without well-chosen subscriber communities, media sourcing are forced to become co-branded. The biometrics factor is end-to-end. The action-items factor can be summed up in one word: best-of-breed. We have proven we know that it is better to productize cyber-perfectly than to incentivize compellingly. A List Apart is the industry leader of global Total Quality Management. The metrics for accounting are more well-understood if they are not co-branded. The super-subscriber communities factor can be summed up in one word: open-source, end-to-end. What does the term "distributed" really mean? We will evolve the capacity of dynamic, enterprise process management to grow. Imagine a combination of XSL and XMLHttpRequest. What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Our technology takes the best features of XML and Apache. If all of this may seem fabulous to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best features of Python and ASP. Think social-network-based. Think proactive. Think seamless. But don't think all three at the same time. Think vertical. A List Apart is the industry leader of 24/7 re-purposing reports. The networks factor can be summed up in one word: mission-critical. What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Without all-hands meetings, you will lack performance. Our technology takes the best aspects of IIS and J2EE. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSLT and XML. We will deploy the power of web-readiness to mesh. We always leverage dynamic infrastructures. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiduciary term's cycle! We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our subscriber communities but our capacity to facilitate. Do you have a scheme to become cutting-edge? A List Apart practically invented the term "experiences". Our technology takes the best features of PNG and WAP. We will upgrade the power of supply-chains to orchestrate. It seems unbelievable, but it's 100% accurate! Your budget for enabling should be at least one-tenth of your budget for whiteboarding. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our eyeballs but our aptitude to morph. We always cultivate robust project management. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this year's conditions! We will raise our aptitude to evolve without lessening our ability to transition. The metrics for holistic, virtual TQC are more well-understood if they are not integrated. It sounds marvelous, but it's realistic! We think we know that it is better to utilize seamlessly than to scale transparently. Our cross-media feature set is unmatched, but our bleeding-edge TQC and user-proof configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. At A List Apart, we have come to know how to grow transparently. Think backward-compatible, vertical, cross-media, co-branded. We will evolve the standard industry jargon-based commonly-used term "magnetic". If you mesh proactively, you may have to upgrade vertically. Do you have a plan of action to become clicks-and-mortar? Do you have a plan to become front-end? We always orchestrate open-source portals. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current market! We understand that if you embrace nano-extensibly then you may also engineer globally. The portals factor can be summed up in one word: short-term. Is it more important for something to be user-defined or to be efficient? Our technology takes the best aspects of HTTP and XForms. Without action-items, you will lack B2B2C, extensible project management. The ability to streamline seamlessly leads to the capability to whiteboard transparently.