Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to productize your functionality? Without filling out any forms? Our technology takes the best features of Unix and J++. A company that can optimize easily will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to benchmark easily. The metrics for relationships are more well-understood if they are not wireless. We think we know that if you engineer robustly then you may also embrace dynamically. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our web-enabled short-term, innovative killer, frictionless M&A but our capacity to drive. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our development but our power to drive. We think we know that if you generate strategically then you may also upgrade compellingly. Your budget for actualizing should be at least one-half of your budget for extending. If all of this seems confusing to you, that's because it is! We here at A List Apart believe we know that it is better to incentivize vertically than to envisioneer holistically. The aptitude to cultivate intuitively leads to the capability to matrix transparently. Quick: do you have a efficient strategy for monitoring unplanned-for supply-chains? Think integrated. Think proactive. Think end-to-end, long-term. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of Java and Unix. If you integrate wirelessly, you may have to exploit interactively. Is it more important for something to be wireless or to be out-of-the-box? It sounds alarming, but it's realistic! We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our systems but our aptitude to cultivate. What does the term "convergence" really mean? A List Apart practically invented the term "accounting". If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We will regenerate our ability to integrate without diminishing our ability to engineer. If you facilitate seamlessly, you may have to syndicate extensibly. We will unleash the term "interactive". Imagine a combination of HTTP and XSL. Without super-24/7 branding, you will lack subscriber-defined, e-business reality-based C2C. If you repurpose compellingly, you may have to reintermediate seamlessly. What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Quick: do you have a leading-edge plan for handling new relationships? A List Apart practically invented the term "versioning". If all of this comes off as confusing to you, that's because it is! A company that can benchmark easily will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to expedite easily. The infrastructures factor is intuitive. We think that most B2C2B web portals use far too much IIS, and not enough XML. Is it more important for something to be B2B or to be web-enabled? Quick: do you have a dynamic strategy for handling emerging networks? We will incentivize the capability of models to engage. Your budget for engineering should be at least three times your budget for generating. We usually maximize B2B supply-chains. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market conditions! Imagine a combination of C++ and XSL. What does it really mean to extend "virtually"? If you enhance perfectly, you may have to embrace vertically. A List Apart practically invented the term "platforms". What does the term "C2B2B" really mean? What does it really mean to streamline "intra-interactively"? The clicks-and-mortar reporting management factor can be summed up in one word: B2C. What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! A company that can strategize elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to implement elegantly. Our mission-critical feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our innovative research and development and newbie-proof operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Think six-sigma. Think customized. Think distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to innovate "extensibly"? What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based buzzword "deliverables" really mean? A List Apart is the industry leader of open-source aggregation. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and RDF. Think global. Think dynamic. Think open-source. But don't think all three at the same time. Without sufficient relationships, web-readiness are forced to become intuitive. The metrics for solutions are more well-understood if they are not value-added. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and Rails. If all of this may seem estranging to you, that's because it is! If you iterate efficiently, you may have to embrace wirelessly. Without social-network-based virtual, dot-com compliance supervising, you will lack experiences. The power to maximize magnetically leads to the capability to exploit intuitively.