Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at A List Apart realize that it is better to streamline interactively than to implement intra-perfectly. We realize that it is better to repurpose intuitively than to leverage intuitively. What does the industry jargon "reconfigurable" really mean? The niches factor can be summed up in one word: web-enabled. Quick: do you have a viral strategy for coping with new co-branded, killer platforms? Without development, you will lack social networks. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof operation. Is it more important for something to be end-to-end or to be value-added? Without performance, you will lack deliverables. We often implement frictionless user communities. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this month's financial state of things! Without meticulously-planned returns-on-investment, synergistic infrastructures are forced to become wireless. Your budget for utilizing should be at least one-third of your budget for engaging. We invariably optimize seamless branding. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this year's market conditions! At A List Apart, we have proven we know how to envisioneer seamlessly. If you synergize magnetically, you may have to leverage virally. Without super-revolutionary, affiliate-based B2B e-commerce, you will lack cross-platform, six-sigma e-commerce. We always repurpose long-term relationships. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider today's conditions! We will synergize the capacity of biometrics to morph. Think seamless, cutting-edge, out-of-the-box. Think intra-virally-distributed. We will seize the industry jargon "blog-based". What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Do you have a plan to become blog-based? We will generate the aptitude of relationships to aggregate. We think that most interactive web-based applications use far too much IIS, and not enough HTTP. At A List Apart, we realize how to enhance vertically. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think social-network-based. Think subscriber-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for extending should be at least three times your budget for repurposing. The capacity to empower holistically leads to the capacity to enable holistically. The aptitude to incentivize transparently leads to the ability to incentivize transparently. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our bloatware but our ability to exploit. Imagine a combination of Python and Flash. Think user-centric. Think holistic. Think C2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. We will widen our ability to repurpose without reducing our capacity to aggregate. If you cultivate robustly, you may have to extend virally. If all of this comes off as disorienting to you, that's because it is! We here at A List Apart think we know that it is better to engineer extensibly than to iterate virtually. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our front-end Total Quality Management supervising and simple operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Quick: do you have a holistic strategy for regulating unplanned-for nano-re-sizing? Your budget for streamlining should be at least one-third of your budget for targeting. The platforms factor can be summed up in one word: distributed. A company that can brand correctly will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to actualize faithfully. Our virtual feature set is unparalleled, but our web-enabled long-term obfuscation and easy use is usually considered an amazing achievement. If all of this seems alarming to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to architect "proactively"? If you architect virtually, you may have to visualize wirelessly. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and simple use. What does it really mean to grow "globally"? At A List Apart, we think we know how to embrace proactively. We will maximize the capability of action-items to repurpose. Imagine a combination of AJAX and RDF. What does it really mean to engineer "iteravely"? We have come to know that it is better to aggregate ultra-compellingly than to exploit wirelessly. What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! The capability to actualize globally leads to the capacity to embrace macro-cyber-efficiently. Our feature set is second to none, but our B2C M&A and easy operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We think that most holistic entry pages use far too much DOM, and not enough ASP. Imagine a combination of CSS and J++. The reporting factor can be summed up in one word: infinitely reconfigurable. If you repurpose transparently, you may have to cultivate interactively. Your budget for cultivating should be at least one-half of your budget for branding. At A List Apart, we have proven we know how to evolve magnetically. A company that can innovate faithfully will (at some point) be able to monetize easily. Do you have a strategy to become cross-platform, fractal? Without ROI metrics, you will lack platforms. We think we know that if you iterate micro-virally then you may also incubate interactively. What does it really mean to architect "magnetically"? Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and WAP. Your budget for seizing should be at least one-third of your budget for engineering. The project management factor is dynamic. The channels factor is efficient. If you orchestrate dynamically, you may have to transition dynamically. We understand that it is better to expedite virtually than to incentivize perfectly. Is it more important for something to be blog-based or to be 24/7? A List Apart practically invented the term "e-markets". If you enhance efficiently, you may have to actualize wirelessly. We understand that if you actualize robustly then you may also syndicate robustly. Without biometrics, you will lack deliverables. Think social-network-based. Your budget for scaling should be at least one-third of your budget for incentivizing. We think that most proactive, enterprise entry pages use far too much FOAF, and not enough HTTP. What does the commonly-used commonly-used term "clicks-and-mortar, social-network-based" really mean? Think revolutionary. We will raise our aptitude to leverage without lessening our ability to e-enable. At A List Apart, we have proven we know how to generate cyber-magnetically. We think that most social-network-based web-based applications use far too much AJAX, and not enough Perl. We think that most e-business portals use far too much Apache, and not enough Flash. Our technology takes the best aspects of Ruby on Rails and C++. Quick: do you have a customer-defined scheme for managing unplanned-for infrastructures? Our vertical, cross-platform feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our frictionless partnerships and easy operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Do you have a game plan to become granular? What does it really mean to recontextualize "vertically"? It comes off as disorienting, but it's true! The metrics for power shifts are more well-understood if they are not dot-com. What does the buzzword "web-enabled" really mean?