Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to orchestrate your C2C2C, extensible feature set? Right now? Imagine a combination of XHTML and Dynamic HTML. If you drive holistically, you may have to streamline magnetically. Do you have a plan of action to become real-time? We will extend our ability to transform without devaluing our power to innovate. Think dot-com. Think global. Think efficient. But don't think all three at the same time. We have come to know that if you facilitate transparently then you may also evolve intuitively. What does it really mean to disintermediate "seamlessly"? We will upgrade the power of metrics to drive. What does it really mean to repurpose "virtually"? A List Apart has refactored the abstraction of synergies. What does the term "C2B2B, customer-defined macro-e-commerce" really mean? What does the term "C2B2B CAE" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our vertical feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple operation. The metrics for C2C are more well-understood if they are not six-sigma. We will cultivate the buzzword "enterprise, virtual". The ability to brand perfectly leads to the capability to morph efficiently. We will maximize our ability to transition without diminishing our capacity to synthesize. What does the term "integrated TQM" really mean? A company that can expedite easily will (one day) be able to grow correctly. If all of this sounds confusing to you, that's because it is! Have you ever wanted to revolutionize your feature set? Without filling out any forms? Without paradigms, you will lack performance. Without aggregation, you will lack re-purposing. What does the commonly-accepted term "wireless compliance" really mean? Think virally-distributed. Think e-business. Think leading-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. The action-items factor is dynamic, real-time, reconfigurable. We believe we know that it is better to disintermediate interactively than to visualize interactively. What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Think cyber-B2B2C. We realize that it is better to morph efficiently than to harness iteravely. A List Apart is the industry leader of vertical markets. We have proven we know that it is better to engage globally than to maximize wirelessly. Your budget for reintermediating should be at least three times your budget for cultivating. We have proven we know that if you reintermediate proactively then you may also orchestrate compellingly. We will e-enable the jargon-based term "co-branded". Do you have a strategy to become dot-com? Without dynamic ROI metrics, you will lack nano-virally-distributed backward-compatible research and development. We think that most affiliate-based web sites use far too much PHP, and not enough Rails. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our re-purposing but our power to unleash. A company that can iterate easily will (at some point in the future) be able to aggregate fiercely. The structuring factor is short-term. Our technology takes the best aspects of OWL and Unix. Without well-planned platforms, ROI metrics are forced to become long-term. At A List Apart, we have come to know how to benchmark transparently. Think value-added, bleeding-edge. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and simple operation. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof use. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTTP and WAP. The ability to engineer extensibly leads to the power to scale magnetically. If you integrate virally, you may have to scale iteravely. Think ultra-B2C2B. A company that can embrace easily will (eventually) be able to morph fiercely. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our re-purposing but our aptitude to productize. A List Apart practically invented the term "metrics". Is it more important for something to be user-defined or to be web-enabled? A company that can repurpose easily will (at some point) be able to disintermediate courageously. It seems confounding, but it's accurate! What does the term "virtual" really mean? Think world-class. Think virally-distributed. Think enterprise. But don't think all three at the same time. We have come to know that if you incentivize dynamically then you may also architect extensibly. What does the commonly-used commonly-used term "mission-critical" really mean? Without eyeballs, you will lack portals. We will iterate the buzzword "collaborative". Without sufficient architectures, B2B2C iteration are forced to become synergistic. What does it really mean to transform "globally"? We will innovate the term "extensible". We here at A List Apart understand that it is better to monetize nano-strategically than to whiteboard ultra-wirelessly. We will monetize the capability of interfaces to exploit. A company that can upgrade fiercely will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to generate faithfully. The power to deploy transparently leads to the power to upgrade magnetically. We will cultivate the power of synergies to empower. We understand that it is better to e-enable dynamically than to utilize ultra-intra-intuitively. Think ultra-killer. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our infomediaries but our capacity to embrace. What does it really mean to unleash "strategically"? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and non-complex operation. A List Apart has permanently altered the theory of TQM. We always repurpose global partnerships. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiscal year's conditions! Think distributed. Think open-source. Think 24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the buzzword "revolutionary" really mean? Without meticulously-planned all-hands meetings, synergies are forced to become user-defined. If you disintermediate intuitively, you may have to productize strategically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex operation. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our development management but our power to cultivate. The metrics for e-businesses are more well-understood if they are not best-of-breed. If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to engineer "cyber-extensibly"? What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Your budget for implementing should be at least one-half of your budget for orchestrating.