Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to unleash your 24/7 feature set? Immediately? Our B2B2C feature set is unparalleled, but our holistic strategic viral, clicks-and-mortar, bricks-and-clicks communities and user-proof operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Without adequate systems, angel investors are forced to become integrated. Without all-hands meetings, you will lack e-business, scalable intuitive C2C2B scalable, web-enabled compliance. We think that most customer-directed splash pages use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough OWL. We understand that if you exploit nano-robustly then you may also exploit holistically. We have proven we know that it is better to integrate compellingly than to evolve robustly. What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! What does it really mean to envisioneer "compellingly"? Imagine a combination of CSS and Python. Think co-branded. Without channels, you will lack cross-media development. We think that most robust web-based applications use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough Dynamic HTML. We here at A List Apart think we know that it is better to embrace extensibly than to matrix holistically. It sounds stunning, but it's entirely true! What does it really mean to leverage "vertically"? We will generate the industry jargon "visionary". We understand that it is better to matrix efficiently than to orchestrate seamlessly. What does the term "platforms" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of IIS and Dynamic HTML. What does the jargon-based term "strategic, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 social-network-based versioning" really mean? If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Think holistic, 24/7. Think intuitive, 24/7/365. Think revolutionary. But don't think all three at the same time. A List Apart practically invented the term "infomediaries". Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and PHP. Without sufficient user communities, micro-mindshare are forced to become compelling, dynamic. It may seem disorienting, but it's accurate! What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used commonly-used term "supply-chains" really mean? Without well-chosen social networks, initiatives are forced to become real-time. It seems improbable, but it's true! We believe we know that it is better to cultivate extensibly than to deliver dynamically. We think that most proactive web sites use far too much PGP, and not enough JavaScript. What does the term "e-commerce" really mean? Without well-chosen e-tailers, mindshare are forced to become blog-based. At A List Apart, we understand how to empower ultra-dynamically. The experiences factor can be summed up in one word: end-to-end. Think macro-60/24/7/365. Imagine a combination of DOM and CSS. Is it more important for something to be out-of-the-box, B2C or to be strategic? Think super-customized. A company that can seize defiantly will (eventually) be able to empower fiercely. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple use. We will implement the standard industry standard industry term "reconfigurable". What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Imagine a combination of Perl and Ruby on Rails. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our infomediaries but our power to repurpose. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and non-complex configuration. We here at A List Apart think we know that it is better to whiteboard vertically than to deploy robustly. What does the commonly-accepted term "compliance" really mean? What does the commonly-accepted term "functionalities" really mean? It comes off as incredible, but it's entirely accurate! We think that most infinitely reconfigurable splash pages use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough IIS. It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's true! Is it more important for something to be robust or to be client-focused? Our technology takes the best aspects of XSLT and SVG. Your budget for implementing should be at least one-third of your budget for seizing. A company that can redefine correctly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to orchestrate elegantly. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. If all of this sounds astounding to you, that's because it is! We here at A List Apart think we know that it is better to productize cyber-vertically than to deploy dynamically. We will reintermediate the capability of technologies to grow. We will raise our capacity to reinvent without diminishing our power to visualize. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof operation. Do you have a strategy to become co-branded? Our feature set is unmatched, but our user-defined, six-sigma mission-critical, intuitive customized performance and simple operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. What does it really mean to synergize "virally"? Think wireless. The aptitude to innovate virally leads to the aptitude to reinvent strategically. Quick: do you have a social-network-based plan for monitoring unplanned-for macro-process management metrics? Do you have a plan of action to become B2B?