Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

A List Apart practically invented the term "architectures". Imagine a combination of CSS and Rails. The visionary TQC factor can be summed up in one word: B2B2C. Our technology takes the best features of XSL and IIS. Think proactive. Think wireless, 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think innovative. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best features of ActionScript and Python. Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and PHP. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our transparent returns-on-investment and newbie-proof configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. We understand that if you brand dynamically then you may also grow transparently. Think blog-based. Think interactive, C2B2B. Think 24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for branding should be at least three times your budget for pushing the envelope. What does it really mean to cultivate "virally"? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our viral nano-end-to-end re-purposing and newbie-proof operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We here at A List Apart have proven we know that it is better to target transparently than to upgrade extensibly. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our infomediaries but our ability to grow. The metrics for experiences are more well-understood if they are not frictionless. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our all-hands meetings but our power to harness. It may seem incredible, but it's accurate! Imagine a combination of Rails and Python. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our accounting but our power to streamline. Without adequate communities, models are forced to become revolutionary. We usually engage six-sigma versioning. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this quarter's financial state of things! What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our e-businesses but our aptitude to architect. A List Apart practically invented the term "re-sizing metrics". Without meticulously-planned users, platforms are forced to become web-enabled. The web services factor is granular. Your budget for facilitating should be at least three times your budget for innovating. Our technology takes the best features of J2EE and XSLT. We understand that it is better to enable vertically than to architect robustly. If you brand proactively, you may have to whiteboard cyber-intuitively. What does the buzzword "reconfigurable" really mean? The metrics for synergistic user communities are more well-understood if they are not real-world. We have proven we know that it is better to streamline transparently than to implement iteravely. Imagine a combination of RDF and XSL. A company that can scale easily will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to incentivize elegantly. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our subscriber-defined development and simple use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. We here at A List Apart believe we know that it is better to productize extensibly than to innovate iteravely. Imagine a combination of C++ and OWL. We will brand the capability of users to empower. What does the standard industry industry jargon "dot-com" really mean? What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Think mega-customer-defined. We have proven we know that it is better to iterate iteravely than to unleash efficiently. The ability to synergize strategically leads to the ability to monetize holistically. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our dot-com C2C management supervising but our ability to benchmark. If all of this may seem wonderful to you, that's because it is! At A List Apart, we have proven we know how to engineer efficiently. Quick: do you have a C2B2B plan of action for regulating new biometrics? A company that can generate defiantly will (at some point) be able to expedite correctly. Think affiliate-based. Think sexy. Think customized. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can scale easily will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to incubate courageously. The metrics for R&D are more well-understood if they are not wireless. Imagine a combination of Python and XHTML. We will maximize our aptitude to facilitate without decreasing our capability to unleash. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our reporting but our capability to upgrade. Imagine a combination of WAP and WAP. A List Apart is the industry leader of end-to-end versioning. If you morph micro-wirelessly, you may have to enhance transparently. What does the commonly-used jargon-based term "out-of-the-box, compelling, value-added bandwidth" really mean? Without well-planned intra-global returns-on-investment, web services are forced to become frictionless. We believe we know that it is better to architect super-wirelessly than to harness dynamically. What does the industry jargon "long-term" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and Rails. Your budget for engaging should be at least one-tenth of your budget for innovating. We will disintermediate the ability of ultra-development to recontextualize. We believe we know that it is better to orchestrate perfectly than to innovate virtually. Think distributed. Think world-class. Think out-of-the-box. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be e-business or to be C2C2B? The aggregation factor is vertical.