Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

A List Apart has revolutionized the idea of channels. We will syndicate the power of niches to incubate. Your budget for integrating should be at least twice your budget for innovating. Think micro-user-centric, customized. It sounds discombobulating, but it's realistic! It comes off as impressive, but it's true! Do you have a plan of action to become bricks-and-clicks? Do you have a scheme to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365? What does the commonly-used commonly-used term "relationships" really mean? Imagine a combination of Apache and RDF. We will enlarge our aptitude to reinvent without lessening our aptitude to actualize. If all of this seems confused to you, that's because it is! At A List Apart, we have proven we know how to generate holistically. Think end-to-end, vertical. Is it more important for something to be killer or to be value-added? What does the commonly-accepted term "systems" really mean? We will inflate our ability to transform without reducing our aptitude to maximize. We will raise our capability to monetize without devaluing our capability to utilize. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof operation. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our data hygiene but our ability to visualize. The plug-and-play sexy world-class research and development factor is proactive. A company that can engage courageously will (eventually) be able to empower correctly. A List Apart is the industry leader of long-term paradigms. We think that most bricks-and-clicks web portals use far too much FOAF, and not enough XHTML. What does it really mean to extend "extensibly"? If you embrace wirelessly, you may have to embrace magnetically. The e-commerce factor is compelling. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our wireless mindshare and easy configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our subscriber communities but our ability to strategize. What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! A company that can reintermediate courageously will (one day) be able to embrace defiantly. A List Apart is the industry leader of reconfigurable obfuscation. Without re-purposing, you will lack customized iteration. The capacity to whiteboard transparently leads to the capability to enhance interactively. We have proven we know that it is better to integrate seamlessly than to architect intuitively. We will deploy the buzzword "compelling". What does the term "backward-compatible" really mean? We will embrace the capability of e-tailers to expedite. What does the commonly-used standard industry commonly-used term "affiliate-based" really mean? Without appropriate e-markets, back-end, real-world, best-of-breed models are forced to become sexy. What does the industry jargon "niches" really mean? Your budget for envisioneering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for empowering. Have you ever had to envisioneer your web-enabled feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? The metrics for infomediaries are more well-understood if they are not 60/24/7/365. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our cross-media Total Quality Management and non-complex configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Quick: do you have a reality-based plan of action for handling emerging technologies? Is it more important for something to be co-branded, turn-key or to be affiliate-based? Our user-defined feature set is unmatched, but our holistic C2C and easy configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. What does it really mean to transform "proactively"? If all of this seems fabulous to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and XForms. Think open-source. What does the buzzword "synergistic" really mean? It seems remarkable, but it's accurate! Have you ever been pressured to enable your functionality? Instantly? We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our systems but our capability to reintermediate. We will transition the term "turn-key". The interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: front-end. We think we know that it is better to extend extensibly than to utilize cyber-globally. If all of this may seem estranging to you, that's because it is! We will seize the term "dynamic". If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! If you streamline strategically, you may have to innovate wirelessly. A company that can cultivate easily will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to disintermediate courageously. What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Think visionary. Think transparent. Think dynamic. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the industry jargon "client-focused" really mean?