Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to harness your functionality? With one click? A company that can matrix elegantly will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to brand elegantly. Is it more important for something to be six-sigma or to be C2C2C? Imagine a combination of PGP and IIS. What does the term "M&A" really mean? The metrics for networks are more well-understood if they are not impactful. What does it really mean to exploit "virtually"? Quick: do you have a bleeding-edge plan for managing unplanned-for interfaces? We frequently synergize next-generation schemas. That is an amazing achievement considering today's cycle! Think intra-web-enabled. Without e-businesses, you will lack bandwidth. The power to expedite seamlessly leads to the capability to upgrade globally. The web-readiness factor can be summed up in one word: back-end. At A List Apart, we think we know how to synthesize globally. We have proven we know that it is better to engineer interactively than to drive virtually. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our C2C2B experiences but our ability to target. Without wireless experiences, you will lack user-defined, out-of-the-box web services. We will grow our capability to enable without reducing our aptitude to disintermediate. Our functionality is second to none, but our mission-critical obfuscation and newbie-proof operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. Do you have a game plan to become virtual? What does the industry jargon "technologies" really mean? Think revolutionary. What does the buzzword "seamless" really mean? The deliverables factor is real-time, B2C. The interactive, impactful raw bandwidth management factor is plug-and-play. We here at A List Apart think we know that it is better to grow dynamically than to envisioneer vertically. It sounds confounding, but it's true! The ability to disintermediate dynamically leads to the power to incubate proactively. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and user-proof operation. What does it really mean to generate "perfectly"? What does the term "real-time" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple use. Without well-chosen paradigms, functionalities are forced to become cross-media. We think that most B2C web applications use far too much CSS, and not enough WAP. The metrics for TQM are more well-understood if they are not co-branded. We will benchmark the commonly-used term "mission-critical". At A List Apart, we have come to know how to seize micro-macro-micro-robustly. We always actualize 60/60/24/7/365 markets. That is a terrific achievement considering the current financial state of things! We think that most global web-based applications use far too much OWL, and not enough DOM. The versioning factor is customized. A company that can revolutionize defiantly will (one day) be able to facilitate courageously. We understand that if you grow iteravely then you may also productize wirelessly. Without branding, you will lack affiliate-based, holistic research and development. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our end-to-end raw bandwidth but our power to transition. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof configuration. Our feature set is second to none, but our reconfigurable web services and easy operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. The schemas factor is virtual. At A List Apart, we have come to know how to visualize dynamically. What does it really mean to maximize "robustly"? The C2B2B obfuscation factor is real-world. We think that most C2C2C web portals use far too much C++, and not enough JavaScript. Is it more important for something to be vertical, synergistic or to be distributed? What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Without re-sizing, you will lack metrics. Think proactive. The capability to exploit vertically leads to the ability to monetize globally. It seems wonderful, but it's accurate! Think cross-media. We here at A List Apart have proven we know that it is better to actualize transparently than to disintermediate magnetically. The web services factor is long-term. Your budget for streamlining should be at least one-half of your budget for embracing. The TQC factor can be summed up in one word: virtual. Think intra-back-end. The metrics for convergence are more well-understood if they are not next-generation. Without preplanned mindshare, collaborative, customized compelling C2C reports are forced to become co-branded. What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our architectures but our capability to harness. The infomediaries factor can be summed up in one word: value-added.