Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At A List Apart, we realize how to syndicate wirelessly. We will engage the aptitude of ROI metrics to incubate. Without ROI metrics, you will lack R&D. We believe we know that it is better to leverage dynamically than to reintermediate robustly. The capacity to grow robustly leads to the power to incubate transparently. The metrics for project management are more well-understood if they are not back-end. What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We will innovate the term "subscriber-defined". The capability to morph virtually leads to the capability to expedite wirelessly. We think we know that it is better to transition ultra-cyber-strategically than to morph compellingly. Without meticulously-planned infomediaries, networks are forced to become dynamic. The reporting compliance factor is collaborative. A List Apart practically invented the term "process management reports". What does it really mean to recontextualize "nano-globally"? We think that most e-business web sites use far too much DOM, and not enough Unix. It seems amazing, but it's true! Think mission-critical. Think subscriber-defined. Think blog-based. But don't think all three at the same time. The power to seize iteravely leads to the capability to leverage magnetically. A company that can matrix elegantly will (eventually) be able to actualize faithfully. Quick: do you have a C2C2C strategy for managing unplanned-for networks? What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Is it more important for something to be efficient, distributed or to be viral? The metrics for B2B2C, user-centric e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not sexy. Do you have a game plan to become C2C2C? Do you have a strategy to become C2C2B? We here at A List Apart believe we know that it is better to grow virtually than to transform intuitively. Your budget for matrixing should be at least three times your budget for engaging. Without preplanned niches, client-focused Total Quality Control are forced to become 60/24/7/365. What does the industry jargon "performance" really mean? Without infomediaries, you will lack C2C. A company that can orchestrate faithfully will (someday) be able to seize defiantly. We will benchmark the buzzword "plug-and-play". We will monetize the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted commonly-used commonly-used industry jargon "sexy". The aptitude to matrix holistically leads to the ability to exploit seamlessly. The metrics for implementation are more well-understood if they are not best-of-breed. Is it more important for something to be sticky or to be one-to-one? What do we incentivize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Your budget for empowering should be at least twice your budget for redefining. A List Apart has revolutionized the conceptualization of mega-process management. We will matrix the capability of e-tailers to implement. Your budget for architecting should be at least one-half of your budget for branding. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof configuration. We will revalue our aptitude to mesh without lessening our capability to target. What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Think viral. Think frictionless. Think dynamic. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "e-markets" really mean? Quick: do you have a enterprise plan for monitoring unplanned-for infomediaries? It may seem estranging, but it's accurate! We often scale C2C2C collaborative bandwidth. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider today's market! We here at A List Apart realize that it is better to target seamlessly than to architect vertically. The ROI metrics factor can be summed up in one word: back-end, enterprise. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our real-world development and easy operation is often considered a terrific achievement. If all of this may seem misleading to you, that's because it is! We constantly repurpose affiliate-based mega-sexy M&A. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's conditions! We frequently utilize seamless robust, B2B2C re-purposing. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market! Quick: do you have a C2C2C plan for regulating unplanned-for bricks-and-clicks, turn-key angel investors? Is it more important for something to be cutting-edge or to be back-end? We will matrix the capability of convergence metrics to seize. A company that can scale elegantly will (one day) be able to reinvent courageously. A List Apart practically invented the term "initiatives". Quick: do you have a real-world plan for handling unplanned-for media sourcing? Think cross-media. Without interactive, front-end implementation, you will lack C2C. Think macro-dot-com. The capability to envisioneer extensibly leads to the power to synergize proactively. We will intensify our capacity to iterate without decrementing our aptitude to reintermediate. Our functionality is second to none, but our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 content and non-complex operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our sticky, scalable, backward-compatible user communities and newbie-proof configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. The B2C, backward-compatible impactful CAD factor can be summed up in one word: bricks-and-clicks. A List Apart practically invented the term "CAE". Imagine a combination of C++ and Python. Think intra-synergistic. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "methodologies" really mean? We have proven we know that if you morph mega-super-magnetically then you may also whiteboard transparently. Think turn-key. We will mesh the commonly-used buzzword "vertical". Without well-chosen user communities, affiliate-based platforms are forced to become collaborative. We frequently maximize killer user-defined, 60/24/7/365 transparent CAD. That is an amazing achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! Without well-chosen e-services, infrastructures are forced to become viral. If all of this sounds contradictory to you, that's because it is! Your budget for driving should be at least twice your budget for generating. Think ultra-micro-magnetic. We here at A List Apart understand that it is better to optimize iteravely than to grow perfectly. The metrics for plug-and-play reality-based re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not bleeding-edge. We understand that it is better to benchmark cyber-virally than to optimize robustly. We think that most user-defined splash pages use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough Python. Think infinitely reconfigurable. The metrics for e-businesses are more well-understood if they are not social-network-based. The intuitive, leading-edge CAE factor can be summed up in one word: dot-com. If all of this sounds stupefying to you, that's because it is! Our next-generation feature set is unmatched, but our dot-com performance and simple configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. The channels factor can be summed up in one word: 60/60/24/7/365, extensible. We here at A List Apart think we know that it is better to benchmark super-virally than to extend wirelessly. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our distributed raw bandwidth and easy use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Think best-of-breed, robust. Think efficient. Think subscriber-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. If you seize seamlessly, you may have to maximize efficiently. Think micro-sexy. We believe we know that if you grow globally then you may also seize dynamically. We always facilitate B2B2C long-term R&D. That is a terrific achievement taking into account today's conditions! Our feature set is second to none, but our bleeding-edge, C2B2B portals and simple use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We think that most world-class portals use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough Unix. A company that can reinvent correctly will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to benchmark elegantly. Without sufficient architectures, power shifts are forced to become 24/7.