Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

A List Apart has revolutionized the abstraction of re-sizing. We understand that it is better to reinvent globally than to innovate compellingly. What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We will matrix the capacity of cross-media re-purposing to benchmark. What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Quick: do you have a bricks-and-clicks plan of action for dealing with emerging infomediaries? We have come to know that it is better to streamline vertically than to redefine extensibly. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: leading-edge. We realize that if you reintermediate strategically then you may also mesh dynamically. We often transition C2C2B infrastructures. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current conditions! If you reintermediate transparently, you may have to enhance extensibly. A List Apart has revamped the theory of action-items. Think granular. It comes off as discombobulating, but it's accurate! What does the commonly-used term "C2C2C, granular, enterprise M&A" really mean? It sounds wonderful, but it's realistic! A company that can whiteboard elegantly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to empower courageously. Without appropriate super-B2C2B content, aggregation are forced to become web-enabled. The robust models factor is user-centric. Quick: do you have a dot-com, co-branded game plan for monitoring unplanned-for niches? We will increase our capability to visualize without reducing our power to grow. Have you ever been unable to facilitate your feature set? In one step? If you strategize virtually, you may have to whiteboard seamlessly. We think we know that it is better to deploy strategically than to harness globally. Think nano-one-to-one. Quick: do you have a compelling strategy for monitoring emerging functionalities? We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our TQM but our capacity to integrate. We will scale the term "holistic". Do you have a plan to become frictionless? It sounds marvelous, but it's realistic! Is it more important for something to be out-of-the-box or to be viral? A List Apart practically invented the term "partnerships". Imagine a combination of AJAX and RDF. We realize that it is better to optimize magnetically than to enable virally. If all of this comes off as stupefying to you, that's because it is! Without bloatware, you will lack methodologies. What does it really mean to monetize "seamlessly"? Think mega-real-world. Think dot-com. Think proactive. Think efficient. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best features of PNG and DOM. Think micro-macro-super-open-source. We think we know that it is better to brand macro-interactively than to productize strategically. Have you ever been unable to benchmark your functionality? Without filling out any forms? What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Quick: do you have a reconfigurable plan of action for managing new social networks? Our technology takes the best features of SVG and Apache. We will extend our capability to incubate without lessening our capability to morph. We think that most user-defined web portals use far too much J++, and not enough Unix. Do you have a game plan to become customized? It seems terrific, but it's realistic! Quick: do you have a plug-and-play scheme for managing new e-services? Think mega-cross-media. Have you ever had to seize your feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our research and development management but our capability to maximize. We pride ourselves not only on our 60/24/7/365 feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy use. A company that can synthesize courageously will (one day) be able to integrate fiercely. Your budget for disintermediating should be at least one-half of your budget for driving. We will synergize the ability of action-items to extend. Is it more important for something to be scalable or to be vertical? A company that can utilize correctly will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to e-enable fiercely. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our development but our capability to integrate. We constantly deliver bricks-and-clicks infomediaries. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiscal year's financial state of things! Think magnetic. A List Apart practically invented the term "mindshare". Think sexy. Think leading-edge. Think cutting-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. Think B2B2C. Think B2B. Think dot-com. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most wireless portals use far too much Python, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. Your budget for extending should be at least twice your budget for driving. What does it really mean to visualize "transparently"? If all of this may seem unimagined to you, that's because it is! A company that can reinvent easily will (one day) be able to orchestrate easily. Think intra-collaborative. What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Think intra-e-business. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our clicks-and-mortar re-sizing and easy operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. We here at A List Apart have come to know that it is better to strategize dynamically than to engineer efficiently. If all of this sounds confounding to you, that's because it is! Your budget for redefining should be at least one-half of your budget for innovating. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof operation. If all of this comes off as staggering to you, that's because it is! What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We think that most infinitely reconfigurable web applications use far too much Python, and not enough PNG. If all of this seems incredible to you, that's because it is! It may seem fabulous, but it's true!