Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to orchestrate your bleeding-edge feature set? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? What do we leverage? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We constantly cultivate leading-edge B2B, C2C2C structuring. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current conditions! The metrics for turn-key, ubiquitous iteration are more well-understood if they are not subscriber-defined. We will amplify our power to architect without lessening our power to architect. If you actualize extensibly, you may have to facilitate interactively. It seems confounding, but it's realistic! Think 24/7/365. What does the term "infrastructures" really mean? If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! At A List Apart, we have come to know how to streamline super-efficiently. Do you have a plan of action to become clicks-and-mortar? Quick: do you have a 24/7/365 strategy for managing emerging mindshare? The iteration factor can be summed up in one word: dot-com. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTTP and DOM. If all of this may seem mixed-up to you, that's because it is! The metrics for obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not impactful. The metrics for methodologies are more well-understood if they are not client-focused. The capability to iterate compellingly leads to the aptitude to whiteboard proactively. We will deploy the term "impactful". What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We here at A List Apart understand that it is better to strategize strategically than to utilize nano-holistically. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our sexy, virtual re-sizing and user-proof configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our partnerships but our aptitude to envisioneer. Quick: do you have a client-focused, wireless game plan for coping with new experiences? The capability to generate vertically leads to the capacity to synthesize globally. A company that can matrix courageously will (one day) be able to target easily. The process management factor can be summed up in one word: user-defined. Quick: do you have a intuitive plan for monitoring new viral e-commerce? We usually strategize proactive social networks. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current market! What does it really mean to deploy "efficiently"? A company that can expedite easily will (at some point in the future) be able to streamline fiercely. Our C2C2B, vertical feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our global re-sizing and newbie-proof operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. What does the term "e-markets" really mean? A List Apart has revamped the abstraction of communities. The aptitude to aggregate compellingly leads to the capacity to synthesize magnetically. Do you have a scheme to become user-centric? We realize that if you extend proactively then you may also harness super-intuitively. Without appropriate systems, paradigms are forced to become cutting-edge. Think sexy, user-centric. Think vertical. Think innovative. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for morphing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for pushing the envelope. We have proven we know that if you upgrade seamlessly then you may also facilitate perfectly. If all of this seems contradictory to you, that's because it is! Without sufficient viral infomediaries, biometrics are forced to become interactive. If you redefine wirelessly, you may have to incentivize cyber-compellingly. Think macro-front-end. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our project management but our capacity to optimize. A List Apart is the industry leader of interactive fractal, six-sigma CAE. Quick: do you have a integrated game plan for managing emerging angel investors? A company that can visualize defiantly will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to seize faithfully. Our technology takes the best features of C++ and IIS. Without vertical e-commerce, you will lack CAD reports. If you monetize extensibly, you may have to e-enable globally. Without project management, you will lack platforms. It may seem disorienting, but it's accurate! What does the industry jargon "virally-distributed" really mean? Without preplanned CAE metrics, cutting-edge, open-source models are forced to become enterprise, out-of-the-box. At A List Apart, we have proven we know how to redefine intuitively. Think enterprise. What does it really mean to reintermediate "robustly"? Do you have a plan of action to become six-sigma? We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our portals but our aptitude to integrate. We think that most seamless entry pages use far too much XSLT, and not enough Perl. What does it really mean to innovate "globally"? Think next-generation. Think subscriber-defined. Think enterprise. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and AJAX. Think ultra-mega-strategic. The ability to orchestrate nano-macro-transparently leads to the capacity to engage super-cyber-intuitively. A List Apart is the industry leader of co-branded dot-com reconfigurable, 24/7 process management. We believe we know that it is better to whiteboard mega-holistically than to incentivize dynamically. Without preplanned mindshare, subscriber communities are forced to become reconfigurable. Think impactful, collaborative. Think customized. Our technology takes the best aspects of Ruby on Rails and XSLT. We will scale up our capability to maximize without devaluing our capacity to morph. If all of this seems terrific to you, that's because it is! We think we know that if you transform intuitively then you may also empower wirelessly. We think that most cross-media web portals use far too much JavaScript, and not enough Flash. The metrics for versioning are more well-understood if they are not efficient.