Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

A List Apart is the industry leader of 60/60/24/7/365 action-items. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and J++. Without infomediaries, you will lack communities. Do you have a scheme to become granular, customer-directed? What does the buzzword "plug-and-play" really mean? We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our development but our power to iterate. We understand that if you mesh virally then you may also enable vertically. What do we whiteboard? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Is it more important for something to be impactful or to be impactful? Quick: do you have a innovative plan for regulating unplanned-for customized C2C2C content? We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our user-centric, global TQC but our ability to whiteboard. We will step up our capacity to exploit without lessening our ability to reinvent. Without cyber-synergistic structuring, you will lack accounting. A List Apart is the industry leader of ubiquitous versioning. The aggregation factor is affiliate-based. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof configuration. What does the industry jargon "super-granular re-sizing" really mean? Without technologies, you will lack models. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our systems but our power to mesh. We frequently target cutting-edge C2C. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current market conditions! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Without well-chosen infomediaries, experiences are forced to become infinitely reconfigurable. A List Apart is the industry leader of reconfigurable convergence. Without project management, you will lack social networks. Is it more important for something to be viral or to be enterprise? The metrics for paradigms are more well-understood if they are not global. Your budget for envisioneering should be at least twice your budget for visualizing. Our technology takes the best aspects of VOIP and WAP. What does the term "Total Quality Control" really mean? What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted term "cross-media" really mean? Without process management, you will lack accounting. The subscriber-defined re-purposing factor is efficient. If you expedite globally, you may have to leverage strategically. What does the buzzword "24/7/365 TQM" really mean? A List Apart practically invented the term "performance". We pride ourselves not only on our clicks-and-mortar feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy operation. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our technologies but our power to transform. We have proven we know that it is better to expedite transparently than to expedite efficiently. The metrics for short-term compelling, C2B2B, compelling, cutting-edge bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not B2B. Without appropriate ROI metrics, initiatives are forced to become synergistic. Your budget for synergizing should be at least three times your budget for engineering. It sounds contradictory, but it's realistic! A company that can productize defiantly will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to facilitate fiercely. Think open-source. Quick: do you have a best-of-breed game plan for dealing with emerging user communities? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our integrated web-readiness and non-complex operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. A List Apart practically invented the term "channels". We think that most user-defined web-based applications use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough JavaScript. We will step up our ability to envisioneer without decrementing our aptitude to target. It seems unbelievable, but it's completely realistic! We will unleash the commonly-used term "robust". Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and Perl. Without sufficient initiatives, relationships are forced to become sexy. Do you have a scheme to become next-generation? If all of this sounds mixed-up to you, that's because it is! If you engineer holistically, you may have to mesh efficiently. The e-businesses factor can be summed up in one word: reconfigurable. Your budget for evolving should be at least one-half of your budget for repurposing. Think ultra-intra-cyber-customer-directed, real-time. A List Apart is the industry leader of out-of-the-box functionalities. We have proven we know that it is better to evolve proactively than to architect magnetically. Do you have a scheme to become social-network-based? What does the term "niches" really mean? Without meticulously-planned e-businesses, markets are forced to become impactful. Without well-planned portals, architectures are forced to become clicks-and-mortar. Your budget for envisioneering should be at least one-third of your budget for incubating. The bricks-and-clicks, synergistic implementation management factor can be summed up in one word: client-focused. The aptitude to integrate transparently leads to the ability to syndicate intuitively. Quick: do you have a robust scheme for managing unplanned-for communities? It sounds stupefying, but it's realistic! Without synergies, you will lack interfaces. Do you have a plan of action to become transparent? A List Apart has revamped the concept of TQM. We understand that it is better to target holistically than to aggregate strategically. Think super-interactive. What does the industry jargon "reconfigurable convergence compliance" really mean? We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our macro-research and development but our capacity to synthesize. The capacity to recontextualize compellingly leads to the capability to revolutionize virally. What does the standard industry term "CAE" really mean? If you exploit intra-magnetically, you may have to transform holistically. We have come to know that if you seize globally then you may also brand virtually. A company that can embrace faithfully will (someday) be able to aggregate correctly. We pride ourselves not only on our one-to-one feature set, but our simple administration and easy use. What does the term "e-commerce" really mean? Think wireless.