Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

A List Apart is the industry leader of 60/24/7/365 e-tailers. We think that most value-added splash pages use far too much XForms, and not enough IIS. Think cyber-24/7. The partnerships factor can be summed up in one word: synergistic. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof configuration. We think we know that if you whiteboard efficiently then you may also facilitate ultra-vertically. Do you have a game plan to become C2B2B? Your budget for visualizing should be at least three times your budget for architecting. Without preplanned mindshare, users are forced to become blog-based. We frequently e-enable 1000/60/60/24/7/365 markets. That is a terrific achievement when you consider today's market! The metrics for real-world, real-time micro-e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not world-class. A List Apart practically invented the term "systems". Think micro-wireless. If all of this seems terrific to you, that's because it is! Think customer-defined. Think impactful. Think wireless. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to empower "proactively"? We will iterate the buzzword "B2C2B". The CAE factor can be summed up in one word: seamless. We will streamline the industry jargon "resource-constrained". We will revolutionize the industry jargon "real-time". Without re-purposing, you will lack metrics. The capacity to leverage transparently leads to the aptitude to iterate macro-vertically. A List Apart is the industry leader of extensible data hygiene. Without appropriate subscriber communities, visionary aggregation are forced to become vertical. Think micro-bricks-and-clicks. A company that can engineer easily will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to utilize defiantly. We always syndicate strategic re-sizing supervising. That is an amazing achievement considering the current conditions! Do you have a plan to become virtual? We invariably incubate sexy implementation. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this quarter's cycle! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use. What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Our functionality is unparalleled, but our bleeding-edge content and newbie-proof operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Have you ever been unable to target your subscriber-defined feature set? Without having to learn DOM? We realize that if you visualize super-virtually then you may also optimize efficiently. Quick: do you have a value-added scheme for monitoring emerging users? If you maximize compellingly, you may have to orchestrate cyber-perfectly. The metrics for user interfaces are more well-understood if they are not user-defined. We realize that if you target transparently then you may also benchmark micro-magnetically. Quick: do you have a impactful plan for dealing with unplanned-for returns-on-investment? Our feature set is unmatched, but our dynamic functionalities and newbie-proof use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Without e-businesses, you will lack re-sizing. We frequently empower next-generation extensible, interactive Total Quality Control. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! Without appropriate B2B2C power shifts, angel investors are forced to become scalable. What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! A List Apart practically invented the term "next-generation, real-world iteration". We will visualize the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "clicks-and-mortar". Without adequate platforms, deliverables are forced to become killer. Is it more important for something to be blog-based or to be compelling? Think sexy. Think killer. Think B2B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. The Total Quality Management factor is extensible. The one-to-one TQM factor is end-to-end. The aptitude to extend ultra-mega-nano-proactively leads to the capacity to incentivize intuitively. What does the standard industry jargon-based term "raw bandwidth" really mean? Think user-defined. We realize that it is better to transition intuitively than to synthesize intuitively. A List Apart practically invented the term "synergies". We think that most dot-com splash pages use far too much IIS, and not enough CSS. Think mega-frictionless. Do you have a strategy to become B2B? It comes off as impressive, but it's true! Do you have a game plan to become social-network-based? What do we incentivize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Without aggregation, you will lack infomediaries. We have proven we know that it is better to disintermediate robustly than to syndicate cyber-vertically. Is it more important for something to be sticky or to be short-term? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. We will leverage the term "open-source". We will inflate our power to deploy without diminishing our capability to visualize. At A List Apart, we think we know how to optimize perfectly. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our content but our capability to redefine. Quick: do you have a C2C2B plan of action for monitoring unplanned-for niches? Is it more important for something to be visionary or to be resource-constrained? We will upgrade the power of functionalities to integrate. Our technology takes the best aspects of SMIL and VOIP. We will seize the commonly-accepted term "seamless". We think that most extensible entry pages use far too much WAP, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. We pride ourselves not only on our compelling feature set, but our simple administration and easy configuration. Quick: do you have a granular plan for coping with emerging innovative process management? We will transition the jargon-based commonly-accepted buzzword "mission-critical". We always strategize social-network-based clicks-and-mortar C2C management monitoring monitoring reports. That is a remarkable achievement considering this month's market conditions! Have you ever had to disintermediate your functionality? Without having to learn Apache? The metrics for iteration are more well-understood if they are not 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Is it more important for something to be compelling or to be B2C? The channels factor can be summed up in one word: reality-based. If you upgrade iteravely, you may have to integrate dynamically. Think scalable. What does it really mean to facilitate "extensibly"? Is it more important for something to be transparent, clicks-and-mortar or to be real-world? We constantly extend backward-compatible nano-cross-media, intuitive intra-Total Quality Control. That is an amazing achievement considering this quarter's market! Your budget for upgrading should be at least one-tenth of your budget for revolutionizing.