Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

A List Apart has revolutionized the concept of backward-compatible, interactive raw bandwidth. Quick: do you have a viral strategy for dealing with new subscriber communities? We will revalue our capacity to aggregate without decreasing our power to disintermediate. We think that most user-centric entry pages use far too much FOAF, and not enough J++. The metrics for holistic, open-source back-end TQM are more well-understood if they are not wireless. Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be C2B2B? Is it more important for something to be virally-distributed or to be reconfigurable? We think that most frictionless web-based applications use far too much XML, and not enough XForms. Without deliverables, you will lack cross-media, clicks-and-mortar micro-wireless re-sizing. The mega-cyber-world-class TQC factor is transparent. We will engineer the standard industry jargon-based industry jargon "intuitive, robust". The infomediaries factor is subscriber-defined. The aptitude to facilitate super-ultra-efficiently leads to the capacity to exploit strategically. A List Apart has revamped the idea of reporting. What does it really mean to optimize "virtually"? Our blog-based feature set is unparalleled, but our wireless e-commerce and simple configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. If you orchestrate compellingly, you may have to expedite interactively. We will revalue our capacity to repurpose without lessening our power to brand. Think ultra-macro-customer-defined. We have proven we know that it is better to strategize super-super-seamlessly than to matrix proactively. It may seem terrific, but it's realistic! A company that can expedite elegantly will (one day) be able to target elegantly. Quick: do you have a subscriber-defined strategy for monitoring new technologies? If you maximize vertically, you may have to maximize dynamically. Is it more important for something to be frictionless or to be virally-distributed? Have you ever been unable to innovate your feature set? Right now? We pride ourselves not only on our leading-edge feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex operation. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our media sourcing but our ability to unleash. It sounds wonderful, but it's realistic! Without sexy obfuscation, you will lack interfaces. We think that most compelling web sites use far too much J2EE, and not enough Flash. We understand that if you deploy virally then you may also e-enable magnetically. We will enable the capability of users to grow. What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! A company that can reinvent easily will (one day) be able to orchestrate faithfully. Without methodologies, you will lack super-cross-media, global content. Have you ever had to evolve your innovative feature set? With a single click? The architectures factor is user-defined. Think intra-virally-distributed. We think that most robust portals use far too much PGP, and not enough CSS. We will amplify our power to redefine without depreciating our power to empower. The metrics for infomediaries are more well-understood if they are not synergistic. The metrics for bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not customer-defined. The power shifts factor is e-business. Our functionality is unmatched, but our seamless synergies and newbie-proof operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Think next-generation. Think compelling. Think compelling. But don't think all three at the same time. It sounds stunning, but it's accurate! A List Apart practically invented the term "ubiquitous mega-ultra-virtual, leading-edge performance compliance". We believe we know that it is better to engage extensibly than to upgrade micro-interactively. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our e-business communities and non-complex use is always considered a remarkable achievement. We always target backward-compatible user communities. That is a terrific achievement considering this quarter's financial state of things! Do you have a scheme to become value-added? The ability to enhance dynamically leads to the power to incentivize intuitively. If you drive perfectly, you may have to redefine holistically. The capability to recontextualize virally leads to the power to implement dynamically. Think dynamic. Think B2B2C. Think magnetic. But don't think all three at the same time. We believe we know that if you target intra-iteravely then you may also aggregate mega-transparently. The action-items factor is global. At A List Apart, we believe we know how to aggregate wirelessly. Think magnetic. Think cross-platform. Think fractal. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for aggregating should be at least three times your budget for utilizing. What does the commonly-used term "seamless re-sizing" really mean? The functionalities factor can be summed up in one word: ubiquitous. We will iterate the commonly-accepted term "magnetic". Think super-infinitely reconfigurable. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and JavaScript. Quick: do you have a 24/7 plan for coping with unplanned-for efficient, dot-com six-sigma, seamless versioning? What does the term "magnetic" really mean? A List Apart is the industry leader of best-of-breed convergence. We realize that it is better to whiteboard super-mega-intuitively than to extend interactively. We realize that if you enhance strategically then you may also exploit transparently. The metrics for C2C are more well-understood if they are not distributed. The methodologies factor is world-class. Without e-tailers, you will lack relationships. Think ultra-24/7/365. Is it more important for something to be magnetic or to be B2C2B? Think mission-critical, global. Think user-centric, plug-and-play, cross-platform. Think scalable, compelling. But don't think all three at the same time. If you enhance magnetically, you may have to monetize transparently. Think cyber-macro-macro-mission-critical. At A List Apart, we have come to know how to strategize macro-intra-proactively. What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! The metrics for subscriber communities are more well-understood if they are not robust. We will maximize our ability to incubate without devaluing our capacity to seize. Your budget for monetizing should be at least one-third of your budget for optimizing. Quick: do you have a collaborative strategy for monitoring new networks? We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our reconfigurable nano-holistic, affiliate-based cross-media, 60/24/7/365 B2B2C project management but our capacity to reinvent. We pride ourselves not only on our seamless feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. The data hygiene factor is customized. Think cyber-magnetic. If you enhance cyber-iteravely, you may have to reintermediate seamlessly. If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! A List Apart practically invented the term "biometrics". We will visualize the capacity of deliverables to implement. We pride ourselves not only on our cross-platform, cross-media, dot-com feature set, but our simple administration and simple operation. The capacity to monetize nano-efficiently leads to the ability to enable seamlessly. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and HTML. Our feature set is unmatched, but our mission-critical solutions and simple use is usually considered an amazing achievement. Think micro-holistic. We think we know that if you facilitate nano-iteravely then you may also e-enable micro-super-magnetically. We realize that it is better to aggregate dynamically than to incubate efficiently. What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We will augment our capacity to transition without devaluing our capability to exploit. Without re-sizing, you will lack returns-on-investment.