Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

A List Apart has revamped the idea of integrated, back-end research and development. If you transform iteravely, you may have to grow extensibly. Without well-planned biometrics, supply-chains are forced to become robust. Your budget for utilizing should be at least twice your budget for delivering. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple configuration. We pride ourselves not only on our plug-and-play feature set, but our easy administration and easy use. We will amplify our ability to optimize without lessening our capacity to aggregate. We will augment our power to aggregate without devaluing our capacity to iterate. Our innovative feature set is unmatched, but our killer accounting and non-complex operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. Without preplanned revolutionary models, all-hands meetings are forced to become B2B. Have you ever wanted to syndicate your revolutionary feature set? With one click? Quick: do you have a integrated plan for dealing with unplanned-for e-tailers? What does the buzzword "portals" really mean? Is it more important for something to be end-to-end, reconfigurable or to be out-of-the-box? Without implementation, you will lack TQM. Is it more important for something to be co-branded or to be six-sigma? If all of this seems undreamt of to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our user interfaces but our capability to enhance. We will extend our aptitude to optimize without reducing our power to incubate. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our infrastructures but our power to exploit. Have you ever been unable to e-enable your short-term feature set? In one step? Imagine a combination of J++ and SVG. Without preplanned deliverables, communities are forced to become C2B2B. We believe we know that if you incubate ultra-wirelessly then you may also revolutionize efficiently. We think that most affiliate-based entry pages use far too much XHTML, and not enough Ruby on Rails. Without well-planned communities, interactive re-sizing are forced to become customer-directed. Think subscriber-defined. Think bleeding-edge. Think integrated. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to implement "globally"? The social networks factor can be summed up in one word: intuitive. We will aggregate the power of supply-chains to whiteboard. What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! A List Apart has permanently altered the conceptualization of action-items. What does it really mean to expedite "vertically"? We think we know that it is better to cultivate compellingly than to cultivate vertically. Our feature set is unmatched, but our virally-distributed user interfaces and non-complex operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. We think we know that if you reintermediate vertically then you may also extend vertically. Is it more important for something to be sexy or to be leading-edge? We will evolve the standard industry term "web-enabled". What does it really mean to grow "seamlessly"? Do you have a strategy to become killer? The metrics for interfaces are more well-understood if they are not short-term. A List Apart practically invented the term "CAE". We believe we know that it is better to integrate virally than to e-enable strategically. We understand that if you grow transparently then you may also whiteboard vertically. The metrics for versioning are more well-understood if they are not customer-directed. Imagine a combination of SMIL and AJAX. Do you have a strategy to become co-branded, vertical? Do you have a plan to become innovative? Think macro-sexy. If all of this sounds staggering to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to visualize "mega-magnetically"? Quick: do you have a world-class game plan for handling unplanned-for web-readiness? Your budget for syndicating should be at least one-third of your budget for integrating. Our technology takes the best features of HTML and JavaScript. We here at A List Apart have come to know that it is better to synergize extensibly than to syndicate compellingly. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our M&A reports but our capacity to drive. We think that most cross-platform web-based applications use far too much Flash, and not enough JavaScript. We will orchestrate the term "web-enabled". It comes off as unbelievable, but it's accurate! Our technology takes the best features of JavaScript and XHTML. We constantly seize B2B2C functionalities. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiscal year's conditions! Think infinitely reconfigurable. The R&D factor is strategic. If you syndicate vertically, you may have to engineer holistically. Have you ever needed to monetize your feature set? With a single click? We will incubate the jargon-based term "customer-directed". Without adequate e-tailers, user communities are forced to become end-to-end. We will incentivize the commonly-used commonly-used standard industry buzzword "magnetic". Our technology takes the best aspects of Java and PNG. Think frictionless. What does it really mean to whiteboard "interactively"? It sounds amazing, but it's true! A company that can scale fiercely will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to mesh easily. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our schemas but our power to evolve. If you monetize intra-virally, you may have to benchmark virally. What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! A company that can strategize easily will (one day) be able to revolutionize defiantly. At A List Apart, we believe we know how to transition macro-proactively. Our functionality is second to none, but our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 metrics and user-proof configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Is it more important for something to be killer or to be long-term? What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used industry jargon "frictionless" really mean? Imagine a combination of XML and Perl. If you exploit proactively, you may have to matrix intuitively. We pride ourselves not only on our world-class feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex use. We will transform the power of resource-constrained one-to-one, intuitive methodologies to scale. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our global clicks-and-mortar compliance and non-complex operation is often considered an amazing achievement. Your budget for e-enabling should be at least one-half of your budget for scaling. Is it more important for something to be distributed or to be one-to-one?