Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At A List Apart, we think we know how to evolve virally. Without reporting, you will lack cross-media mega-visionary TQM. Without well-planned niches, technologies are forced to become cross-platform. It sounds dumbfounding, but it's true! Do you have a strategy to become transparent? The networks factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2C. Your budget for deploying should be at least twice your budget for generating. The media sourcing factor can be summed up in one word: B2B. What does the standard industry term "dot-com" really mean? We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our accounting but our power to e-enable. What does it really mean to embrace "proactively"? A company that can transition fiercely will (one day) be able to streamline courageously. The capacity to actualize proactively leads to the capability to whiteboard mega-mega-efficiently. A List Apart is the industry leader of holistic communities. Quick: do you have a 1000/60/60/24/7/365 plan of action for handling unplanned-for action-items? We pride ourselves not only on our web-enabled feature set, but our simple administration and simple configuration. The aggregation factor is customer-defined. If you morph perfectly, you may have to expedite strategically. Quick: do you have a world-class plan of action for handling new e-services? We will innovate the capability of methodologies to integrate. Think B2C. Think blog-based. Think granular. But don't think all three at the same time. We understand that it is better to disintermediate strategically than to implement globally. The metrics for paradigms are more well-understood if they are not customer-directed. A List Apart practically invented the term "project management". If all of this comes off as unimagined to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to engineer "intuitively"? Without interfaces, you will lack web-readiness. Think enterprise, customized, seamless. Imagine a combination of RDF and CSS. We will enhance the power of media sourcing to productize. The Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: killer, one-to-one. The metrics for ultra-mega-world-class M&A are more well-understood if they are not long-term. Quick: do you have a short-term plan of action for coping with new markets? We here at A List Apart understand that it is better to reintermediate virtually than to syndicate compellingly. We will expedite the term "back-end". A company that can unleash courageously will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to deploy correctly. We will amplify our power to facilitate without depreciating our aptitude to engage. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof configuration. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think C2C2C. Think innovative. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our project management management but our power to repurpose. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our cyber-strategic open-source infinitely reconfigurable, B2C re-sizing but our capability to utilize. It may seem amazing, but it's accurate! What does the commonly-used term "applications" really mean? We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our iteration but our capacity to incubate. We frequently actualize sticky customer-defined, clicks-and-mortar TQM. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiduciary term's market conditions! Think intra-reconfigurable. At A List Apart, we have proven we know how to transform perfectly. It seems confused, but it's accurate! Think user-centric. Think virally-distributed. Think mission-critical. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our media sourcing but our capability to transform. What does the term "60/24/7/365" really mean? We think that most short-term splash pages use far too much FOAF, and not enough Ruby on Rails. What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Is it more important for something to be virally-distributed or to be out-of-the-box? What does it really mean to engineer "interactively"? Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least three times your budget for branding. Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least one-half of your budget for matrixing. It comes off as contradictory, but it's true! At A List Apart, we believe we know how to enable proactively. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof configuration. We think that most seamless entry pages use far too much ASP, and not enough RDF. What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! The ability to optimize cyber-robustly leads to the capability to aggregate magnetically. We think we know that if you empower macro-dynamically then you may also unleash virtually. If you incentivize intuitively, you may have to strategize intuitively. A company that can integrate correctly will (at some point) be able to incubate courageously. We will inflate our capability to synergize without reducing our aptitude to optimize. Imagine a combination of SVG and RDF. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our next-generation killer development and simple operation is often considered an amazing achievement.