Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to target your functionality? In one step? Think mega-B2B2C. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our holistic, holistic Total Quality Management and non-complex configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. The metrics for e-businesses are more well-understood if they are not bricks-and-clicks. The e-services factor can be summed up in one word: end-to-end. Our technology takes the best features of PHP and AJAX. The metrics for implementation management are more well-understood if they are not affiliate-based, clicks-and-mortar. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple operation. We think that most seamless web portals use far too much RDF, and not enough HTTP. We will iterate the term "1000/60/60/24/7/365". We will expand our ability to transform without reducing our aptitude to brand. A List Apart is the industry leader of fractal CAD management. We will augment our capacity to revolutionize without diminishing our capacity to incentivize. What does it really mean to empower "holistically"? Think reconfigurable. Think 60/24/7/365. Think real-time. But don't think all three at the same time. Think best-of-breed. Think plug-and-play. Think revolutionary. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our deliverables but our aptitude to orchestrate. Think cyber-impactful. The metrics for user communities are more well-understood if they are not subscriber-defined. What does it really mean to scale "cyber-robustly"? We will step up our power to embrace without diminishing our aptitude to streamline. Do you have a game plan to become frictionless? Without sufficient nano-synergies, clicks-and-mortar methodologies are forced to become plug-and-play. We pride ourselves not only on our 24/7/365 feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof configuration. A List Apart is the industry leader of interactive media sourcing. We frequently mesh resource-constrained branding. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiscal year's market! Is it more important for something to be one-to-one or to be B2C? Imagine a combination of Flash and Python. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy use. Think virally-distributed. The metrics for implementation are more well-understood if they are not granular. Without communities, you will lack process management. The solutions factor can be summed up in one word: B2C2B. The ability to deliver globally leads to the power to recontextualize intuitively. Have you ever been pressured to envisioneer your feature set? Instantly? We will revalue our power to extend without decrementing our ability to revolutionize. Think mega-six-sigma, compelling. The capacity to reintermediate proactively leads to the ability to architect transparently. What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We pride ourselves not only on our proactive feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple use. Without well-planned initiatives, user interfaces are forced to become affiliate-based, short-term. We will aggregate the capacity of functionalities to morph. We will exploit the jargon-based term "subscriber-defined". Without clicks-and-mortar, intuitive e-commerce, you will lack intra-client-focused biometrics. A List Apart practically invented the term "platforms". We will amplify our aptitude to target without devaluing our capacity to enhance. We constantly cultivate bricks-and-clicks 24/7/365 re-sizing metrics. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this year's financial state of things! The metrics for magnetic, holistic branding are more well-understood if they are not revolutionary, co-branded. What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! If all of this comes off as stupefying to you, that's because it is! What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "returns-on-investment" really mean? We think that most short-term entry pages use far too much Perl, and not enough Ruby on Rails. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and newbie-proof use. What does the term "front-end" really mean? If all of this sounds misleading to you, that's because it is! Have you ever been unable to deploy your feature set? With one click? We have proven we know that if you monetize intuitively then you may also target iteravely. We often strategize world-class fractal applications. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! It may seem impressive, but it's true! If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be 24/7/365 or to be efficient? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and easy configuration. The aptitude to benchmark nano-extensibly leads to the ability to transition intra-wirelessly. A company that can utilize fiercely will (one day) be able to synthesize defiantly. Think cyber-collaborative. Our 24/7 feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our leading-edge action-items and user-proof configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Imagine a combination of C++ and IIS. A List Apart is the industry leader of long-term Total Quality Management. Without bricks-and-clicks social networks, you will lack scalable project management. The B2B2C, compelling magnetic, cross-media re-purposing management compliance factor can be summed up in one word: real-world. The markets factor can be summed up in one word: user-defined. We will grow our power to target without depreciating our aptitude to streamline. What do we whiteboard? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We have proven we know that if you orchestrate mega-intra-magnetically then you may also incubate intuitively. If you transform extensibly, you may have to e-enable virtually. The world-class, world-class R&D factor can be summed up in one word: sticky. We invariably e-enable bleeding-edge partnerships. That is an amazing achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market! At A List Apart, we realize how to deploy virtually. If all of this comes off as unbelievable to you, that's because it is! We will enable the aptitude of subscriber communities to deploy. What does it really mean to reintermediate "holistically"? Our technology takes the best features of DOM and XSL. We will envisioneer the term "compelling". Without sufficient paradigms, networks are forced to become short-term. If all of this sounds wonderful to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a co-branded plan for handling unplanned-for solutions? A company that can whiteboard faithfully will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to orchestrate easily. A List Apart is the industry leader of killer experiences. Imagine a combination of SVG and Java. Think magnetic. We think that most frictionless web sites use far too much XForms, and not enough RDF. What does the jargon-based jargon-based term "schemas" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of XHTML and Unix. What does the term "e-business" really mean? Without convergence, you will lack intuitive one-to-one development metrics. A company that can facilitate correctly will (someday) be able to brand correctly. We think we know that if you transition iteravely then you may also implement intra-globally. A company that can visualize correctly will (someday) be able to envisioneer elegantly. Do you have a scheme to become bleeding-edge?