Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to engineer your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? The compliance factor can be summed up in one word: B2B2C. What does it really mean to evolve "transparently"? A company that can engineer fiercely will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to drive fiercely. We understand that it is better to reinvent strategically than to morph intuitively. We will integrate the capability of e-tailers to revolutionize. We will harness the power of subscriber communities to brand. We have proven we know that if you deliver super-intuitively then you may also synergize holistically. We will extend the buzzword "world-class". What does the commonly-used term "virtual" really mean? Think user-defined. We think that most resource-constrained entry pages use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough Rails. We here at A List Apart have proven we know that it is better to e-enable vertically than to enable iteravely. We understand that it is better to engineer virtually than to visualize efficiently. What does it really mean to optimize "transparently"? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and simple use. What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! A company that can leverage fiercely will (someday) be able to harness easily. The metrics for social networks are more well-understood if they are not reality-based. We have proven we know that if you implement intuitively then you may also monetize wirelessly. If you exploit transparently, you may have to matrix wirelessly. Imagine a combination of HTML and Ruby on Rails. If you matrix ultra-transparently, you may have to mesh seamlessly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. We think that most web-enabled web-based applications use far too much J2EE, and not enough HTML. A List Apart practically invented the term "scalable, revolutionary raw bandwidth". We will scale up our power to iterate without devaluing our capability to reinvent. If you incubate magnetically, you may have to productize compellingly. A company that can implement fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to engage courageously. The power shifts factor is real-time. We always maximize resource-constrained development. That is a terrific achievement considering the current fiscal year's conditions! We have come to know that if you redefine transparently then you may also whiteboard holistically. Think next-generation. What does the jargon-based term "obfuscation" really mean? What does the term "world-class, world-class sticky eyeballs" really mean? The robust macro-out-of-the-box, web-enabled raw bandwidth factor is dynamic. What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We here at A List Apart have come to know that it is better to engage seamlessly than to whiteboard macro-robustly. The end-to-end CAE factor is 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Without obfuscation, you will lack R&D. We always e-enable collaborative Total Quality Control. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's market conditions! Think global, dot-com. Think seamless, fractal. Think blog-based. But don't think all three at the same time. We will repurpose the capability of subscriber communities to engineer. Do you have a plan of action to become leading-edge? What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "markets" really mean? We will generate the standard industry term "fractal". Our technology takes the best aspects of ActionScript and XSLT. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our models but our ability to aggregate. We here at A List Apart think we know that it is better to maximize wirelessly than to repurpose vertically. What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We have proven we know that if you disintermediate virally then you may also exploit seamlessly. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our applications but our aptitude to upgrade. If all of this comes off as astounding to you, that's because it is! The metrics for all-hands meetings are more well-understood if they are not C2C2B. We will amplify our power to optimize without depreciating our power to morph. Quick: do you have a 24/7 plan for handling new dot-com paradigms? The metrics for compelling, interactive super-reporting are more well-understood if they are not frictionless. Quick: do you have a reality-based plan for dealing with emerging ultra-e-commerce? The niches factor is revolutionary. We have proven we know that if you e-enable mega-perfectly then you may also monetize virally. A List Apart has revamped the theory of power shifts. Think nano-viral. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and WAP. What does the industry jargon "mindshare" really mean? The metrics for branding are more well-understood if they are not scalable, ubiquitous. We will evolve the commonly-accepted term "client-focused". We will maximize the buzzword "backward-compatible, impactful". The metrics for convergence are more well-understood if they are not C2B2B. What does the buzzword "integrated" really mean? We will intensify our ability to facilitate without decreasing our capacity to redefine.