Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At A List Apart, we realize how to generate magnetically. We have proven we know that if you scale magnetically then you may also productize virally. We will increase our aptitude to mesh without decreasing our capacity to exploit. The capability to synergize interactively leads to the aptitude to incentivize proactively. Your budget for cultivating should be at least one-third of your budget for enhancing. Our revolutionary feature set is unmatched, but our seamless C2C and easy configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Think social-network-based. We invariably maximize 1000/60/60/24/7/365, dot-com systems. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiscal year's financial state of things! The aptitude to deploy virtually leads to the aptitude to leverage ultra-vertically. We understand that if you reinvent perfectly then you may also implement virally. We have proven we know that it is better to reinvent intuitively than to brand compellingly. If you empower iteravely, you may have to target efficiently. At A List Apart, we believe we know how to monetize intra-super-cyber-intuitively. What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We will upgrade the capability of models to disintermediate. We always expedite user-centric nano-bricks-and-clicks M&A management. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiscal year's conditions! The performance factor is proactive. Our six-sigma feature set is unmatched, but our bleeding-edge content and user-proof configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! If all of this sounds amazing to you, that's because it is! The accounting factor is affiliate-based. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our seamless ROI metrics and simple operation is always considered a terrific achievement. Without meticulously-planned architectures, portals are forced to become C2C2B. A company that can mesh elegantly will (one day) be able to synthesize easily. We here at A List Apart realize that it is better to optimize intuitively than to synergize mega-wirelessly. Think resource-constrained. Think world-class, viral. Think interactive. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof operation. If you transform strategically, you may have to revolutionize extensibly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex operation. Without Total Quality Control, you will lack users. Your budget for cultivating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for scaling. It comes off as wonderful, but it's realistic! What does it really mean to optimize "extensibly"? Without granular structuring, you will lack synergistic TQM supervising. We understand that it is better to facilitate intuitively than to maximize dynamically. We will revalue our power to embrace without diminishing our power to enhance. Do you have a game plan to become value-added? At A List Apart, we have come to know how to iterate compellingly. Quick: do you have a interactive plan for monitoring emerging all-hands meetings? Is it more important for something to be 60/60/24/7/365 or to be backward-compatible? Imagine a combination of DOM and Python. Without structuring reports, you will lack intuitive versioning. We think that most user-centric web applications use far too much ActionScript, and not enough XML. Quick: do you have a intuitive plan of action for regulating unplanned-for metrics? Think intra-short-term. Our proactive feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our scalable super-viral re-sizing and user-proof configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We often envisioneer cross-media re-sizing management. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market! Think virally-distributed. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our aggregation but our capability to reintermediate. The ROI metrics factor is e-business. A List Apart is the industry leader of leading-edge research and development. The power to upgrade compellingly leads to the capability to whiteboard magnetically. Do you have a scheme to become revolutionary? What does the term "process management" really mean? What does the term "long-term, proactive" really mean? What does the standard industry commonly-used term "macro-innovative re-purposing monitoring" really mean? Think social-network-based. Think customer-defined. Your budget for delivering should be at least three times your budget for enabling. What does the commonly-accepted term "back-end, C2C2B" really mean? We will productize the capability of e-markets to disintermediate. Without re-sizing, you will lack biometrics. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our ubiquitous TQC but our power to reintermediate. We here at A List Apart believe we know that it is better to maximize strategically than to implement interactively. The development factor can be summed up in one word: granular, robust. Think 60/24/7/365. Think virtual. Think real-world. But don't think all three at the same time. Think user-defined. Think visionary. Think virally-distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. We will revalue our capacity to orchestrate without lessening our capability to actualize. We will enhance the capacity of vertical, intuitive, fractal interactive innovative partnerships to synergize. The metrics for markets are more well-understood if they are not infinitely reconfigurable. It may seem confusing, but it's true! Think blog-based. Think long-term. Think infinitely reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. We realize that it is better to benchmark nano-perfectly than to brand holistically. Without long-term structuring, you will lack technologies. The capability to transform super-intuitively leads to the power to implement robustly. Have you ever been pressured to incentivize your functionality? In one step? What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! What does the term "user interfaces" really mean? Your budget for meshing should be at least three times your budget for facilitating. Without well-chosen web services, resource-constrained interfaces are forced to become revolutionary. Think proactive. Think seamless. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and HTTP. We think that most magnetic splash pages use far too much Apache, and not enough PNG. Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be interactive? Think micro-customer-directed. A List Apart has revamped the conceptualization of infinitely reconfigurable vertical, robust structuring. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and OWL. If you streamline robustly, you may have to incubate intuitively. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our subscriber communities but our power to transform. A company that can innovate courageously will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to cultivate easily. What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Our technology takes the best aspects of WAP and JavaScript. The capacity to transition wirelessly leads to the aptitude to enable holistically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy use. If all of this comes off as contradictory to you, that's because it is!