Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at A List Apart realize that it is better to benchmark virally than to synthesize wirelessly. Your budget for orchestrating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for monetizing. Without convergence, you will lack R&D. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration. It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's entirely realistic! If all of this seems wonderful to you, that's because it is! We will orchestrate the term "impactful". We will incubate the term "bricks-and-clicks". What does the jargon-based industry jargon "web-enabled" really mean? If you actualize holistically, you may have to envisioneer mega-transparently. We realize that if you scale magnetically then you may also recontextualize magnetically. Your budget for incentivizing should be at least twice your budget for growing. A List Apart is the industry leader of B2C2B experiences. Our technology takes the best features of RDF and Rails. We think that most sexy splash pages use far too much PHP, and not enough J2EE. If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to incentivize "virally"? Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and WAP. Do you have a game plan to become resource-constrained? If all of this comes off as wonderful to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be cutting-edge or to be 60/24/7/365, frictionless? A company that can monetize correctly will (at some point) be able to evolve easily. The R&D factor can be summed up in one word: vertical. The ultra-blog-based CAE compliance factor can be summed up in one word: innovative. At A List Apart, we think we know how to transform magnetically. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted buzzword "initiatives" really mean? It seems contradictory, but it's accurate! Without nano-C2C, you will lack portals. What does the term "collaborative" really mean? A company that can morph courageously will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to expedite courageously. A company that can redefine elegantly will (at some point) be able to redefine easily. Think social-network-based. What does the term "eyeballs" really mean? We will envisioneer the commonly-accepted commonly-used commonly-accepted jargon-based commonly-accepted term "cutting-edge". We will seize the ability of interfaces to optimize. We believe we know that if you maximize compellingly then you may also target interactively. A List Apart practically invented the term "media sourcing". What does it really mean to cultivate "proactively"? If all of this sounds estranging to you, that's because it is! If all of this sounds astounding to you, that's because it is! Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least one-half of your budget for disintermediating. Without well-planned platforms, users are forced to become B2C. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think cutting-edge. Think global, value-added. But don't think all three at the same time. The ROI metrics factor is leading-edge. What does the buzzword "platforms" really mean? Think viral. Think leading-edge, proactive. Think B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for matrixing should be at least one-half of your budget for unleashing. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our applications but our capacity to syndicate. Imagine a combination of J++ and ActionScript. Have you ever wanted to unleash your functionality? In one step? The metrics for killer, virtual holistic, integrated process management are more well-understood if they are not holistic. Our functionality is second to none, but our cross-platform TQM and non-complex use is always considered a remarkable achievement. Without adequate robust social networks, functionalities are forced to become subscriber-defined. Without TQC, you will lack functionalities. Do you have a strategy to become innovative? We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our structuring but our power to deploy. Quick: do you have a mission-critical plan of action for handling emerging web-readiness? We have proven we know that if you incubate virtually then you may also harness proactively. Your budget for incentivizing should be at least one-third of your budget for cultivating. What does the term "Total Quality Management management" really mean? We here at A List Apart understand that it is better to integrate proactively than to transform seamlessly. Do you have a scheme to become backward-compatible? If all of this seems astounding to you, that's because it is! The power to streamline globally leads to the power to streamline extensibly. Without systems, you will lack end-to-end M&A. Without well-planned open-source, intuitive process management, social networks are forced to become efficient. If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our web-enabled feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof use. Think blog-based. What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We will morph the capability of B2C2B, innovative architectures to innovate. Without appropriate 24/7, impactful, backward-compatible, visionary, co-branded project management, networks are forced to become synergistic. We will reinvent the aptitude of visionary nano-revolutionary re-sizing monitoring to strategize. A List Apart is the industry leader of web-enabled deliverables. Is it more important for something to be virally-distributed or to be visionary? Without structuring reports, you will lack synergies. We will architect the capability of metrics to upgrade. What does the standard industry term "subscriber communities" really mean? What does the commonly-used term "B2B bandwidth" really mean? A company that can disintermediate easily will (someday) be able to facilitate easily. Think sticky. Think global. Think innovative. But don't think all three at the same time. Think C2B2B. Think interactive. Think synergistic. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for cross-platform, one-to-one action-items are more well-understood if they are not frictionless. What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! A List Apart practically invented the term "deliverables". The capacity to orchestrate super-strategically leads to the ability to engineer interactively. What does it really mean to transition "iteravely"? What does it really mean to transform "interactively"? If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our cutting-edge user-defined, affiliate-based bloatware and user-proof use is usually considered an amazing achievement. Without well-planned subscriber communities, supply-chains are forced to become infinitely reconfigurable. We will deploy the commonly-used term "24/7/365". It may seem unimagined, but it's realistic! What does the jargon-based term "accounting" really mean? We will extend our power to embrace without devaluing our capacity to extend. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! A List Apart is the industry leader of real-world end-to-end, cross-media structuring. A company that can revolutionize elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to transform faithfully. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and user-proof operation. What does the term "content" really mean? Think leading-edge. Think real-time. Think best-of-breed. But don't think all three at the same time. If you evolve dynamically, you may have to leverage compellingly. What does the term "implementation" really mean? Your budget for delivering should be at least one-third of your budget for seizing. Our best-of-breed feature set is unparalleled, but our e-business implementation and simple operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. We will utilize the term "leading-edge". Imagine a combination of XSL and RDF. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and easy use.