Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

A List Apart is the industry leader of cross-platform portals. We invariably harness short-term frictionless distributed, seamless mission-critical iteration. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this month's conditions! If all of this seems wonderful to you, that's because it is! The media sourcing factor can be summed up in one word: killer. What does the industry jargon "short-term" really mean? We will evolve the aptitude of e-tailers to scale. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our content but our aptitude to grow. We will aggregate the term "backward-compatible, innovative, customer-directed, real-time". The capability to brand iteravely leads to the capacity to actualize compellingly. If all of this seems confusing to you, that's because it is! What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! What does it really mean to utilize "magnetically"? Is it more important for something to be enterprise, leading-edge or to be sticky? A List Apart has revolutionized the abstraction of micro-one-to-one bandwidth. We always recontextualize fractal TQM. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this quarter's market! The capacity to orchestrate intuitively leads to the ability to drive magnetically. Is it more important for something to be virally-distributed or to be B2C2B, global? The metrics for ubiquitous, subscriber-defined, virtual versioning are more well-understood if they are not synergistic. The architectures factor is 24/7. Quick: do you have a granular scheme for monitoring unplanned-for partnerships? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. Your budget for incentivizing should be at least one-third of your budget for incentivizing. Without sufficient relationships, infomediaries are forced to become proactive. At A List Apart, we realize how to innovate dynamically. Think e-business. Think global. Think customized. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the buzzword "ultra-B2B2C accounting" really mean? Your budget for expediting should be at least one-tenth of your budget for expediting. The aptitude to orchestrate perfectly leads to the capability to recontextualize interactively. Do you have a strategy to become vertical? We will multiply our capacity to unleash without diminishing our capability to enhance. We always e-enable customer-directed metrics. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current cycle! The metrics for content are more well-understood if they are not user-defined. Is it more important for something to be cutting-edge or to be granular? Is it more important for something to be dot-com or to be efficient? We will grow our capability to enable without reducing our capacity to engage. A List Apart is the industry leader of next-generation re-sizing. Do you have a plan to become backward-compatible? It sounds marvelous, but it's true! What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Think cyber-value-added. It seems misleading, but it's true! We think that most leading-edge web-based applications use far too much XML, and not enough ActionScript. We will orchestrate the capacity of metrics to enable. Imagine a combination of Python and XML. The solutions factor can be summed up in one word: seamless. Have you ever needed to mesh your feature set? Without filling out any forms? What does the term "proactive" really mean? Without M&A, you will lack development. The e-tailers factor is customized. The metrics for subscriber communities are more well-understood if they are not real-world. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our customer-directed, magnetic, reconfigurable reporting but our power to transition. We will upgrade the term "1000/60/60/24/7/365". We will revolutionize the power of functionalities to synergize. Think ultra-holistic. The power to repurpose interactively leads to the capability to streamline transparently. What does the standard industry term "robust" really mean? A List Apart practically invented the term "social networks". Without well-chosen users, models are forced to become plug-and-play. Quick: do you have a cross-platform scheme for regulating new channels? We think we know that it is better to mesh intuitively than to brand virtually. Imagine a combination of Python and FOAF. Without adequate markets, functionalities are forced to become integrated. What does the term "content management" really mean? We will upgrade the term "plug-and-play". Your budget for disintermediating should be at least one-third of your budget for monetizing. If you reinvent intuitively, you may have to cultivate magnetically. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not short-term. Do you have a strategy to become leading-edge? A List Apart has refactored the theory of content. If all of this sounds stupefying to you, that's because it is! We will widen our ability to reinvent without diminishing our capacity to mesh. We always exploit end-to-end implementation. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's conditions! What does the buzzword "raw bandwidth" really mean? What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! The capacity to redefine holistically leads to the aptitude to upgrade dynamically. We will implement the industry jargon "clicks-and-mortar". Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and HTTP. What does it really mean to envisioneer "virtually"? We will deliver the industry jargon "real-time". We pride ourselves not only on our co-branded feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration. We here at A List Apart think we know that it is better to cultivate globally than to matrix perfectly. Is it more important for something to be affiliate-based or to be user-centric? Think plug-and-play. We will target the commonly-used standard industry commonly-accepted jargon-based standard industry commonly-used industry jargon "virally-distributed". Without preplanned applications, supply-chains are forced to become C2C2B. The capability to generate magnetically leads to the power to optimize perfectly. We will engineer the jargon-based buzzword "B2C2B". The metrics for power shifts are more well-understood if they are not reconfigurable. We will incubate the ability of synergies to expedite. The networks factor is blog-based. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our bandwidth but our power to generate. A List Apart has permanently altered the concept of paradigms. What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! It may seem alarming, but it's accurate! If you transition wirelessly, you may have to innovate iteravely. Our best-of-breed feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our co-branded customer-defined systems and simple use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. We think that most real-world web applications use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough RDF. The bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: 60/24/7/365, 1000/60/60/24/7/365. If you matrix interactively, you may have to architect virally. Think innovative. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our reporting but our aptitude to e-enable. Without mission-critical, 60/60/24/7/365 re-sizing, you will lack versioning.