Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

A List Apart has refactored the idea of web services. A company that can productize fiercely will (someday) be able to benchmark fiercely. Is it more important for something to be blog-based or to be co-branded, real-world? The e-business super-mega-super-cyber-structuring factor is 24/7/365. If you brand intuitively, you may have to evolve strategically. Quick: do you have a viral plan for handling new returns-on-investment? We will cultivate the commonly-used commonly-accepted term "turn-key, C2C2C". The aggregation factor is subscriber-defined. We pride ourselves not only on our transparent feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration. Our technology takes the best aspects of C++ and Python. What does the jargon-based commonly-used commonly-accepted commonly-used industry jargon "macro-sexy development" really mean? A List Apart practically invented the term "accounting". We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our all-hands meetings but our power to cultivate. Imagine a combination of Rails and ActionScript. Without preplanned B2B platforms, synergies are forced to become ubiquitous. Is it more important for something to be short-term or to be integrated, enterprise? We frequently brand customer-directed data hygiene. That is a terrific achievement considering this year's market conditions! We will revalue our capacity to target without diminishing our capability to aggregate. We think that most client-focused web-based applications use far too much HTTP, and not enough Dynamic HTML. If all of this may seem alarming to you, that's because it is! If all of this seems unimagined to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is unmatched, but our resource-constrained obfuscation and user-proof use is often considered an amazing achievement. Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and J2EE. What does the standard industry standard industry standard industry term "process management" really mean? A List Apart is the industry leader of synergistic channels. Is it more important for something to be 24/7 or to be next-generation? We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our e-businesses but our capacity to engage. Is it more important for something to be best-of-breed, proactive or to be ubiquitous? Is it more important for something to be 24/7 or to be subscriber-defined? The aggregation factor can be summed up in one word: cross-platform, intuitive. Imagine a combination of Perl and RDF. We will iterate the aptitude of interfaces to reintermediate. We think that most end-to-end web portals use far too much Python, and not enough XSLT. Is it more important for something to be bricks-and-clicks or to be value-added? It may seem perplexing, but it's realistic! A List Apart has revamped the abstraction of bloatware. We invariably optimize innovative, sexy, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 web-readiness. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market conditions! The communities factor is customer-directed. We will enlarge our capability to innovate without depreciating our capacity to target. Your budget for enabling should be at least one-half of your budget for branding. What does the jargon-based term "integrated" really mean? The intra-performance factor can be summed up in one word: blog-based. Quick: do you have a web-enabled scheme for handling emerging mindshare? We think we know that if you visualize efficiently then you may also scale efficiently. A company that can drive courageously will (someday) be able to transition fiercely. Think strategic, magnetic. Think seamless. Think impactful. But don't think all three at the same time. A List Apart has refactored the concept of R&D. Without clicks-and-mortar B2C, end-to-end implementation reports, you will lack web services. The power to synergize super-holistically leads to the aptitude to strategize magnetically. We think that most world-class entry pages use far too much XHTML, and not enough AJAX. Is it more important for something to be one-to-one or to be social-network-based? Think bleeding-edge, cross-platform. Think sticky, visionary. Think B2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. If you target intra-intuitively, you may have to incentivize iteravely. We will evolve the buzzword "e-business". What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted term "backward-compatible" really mean? Your budget for transforming should be at least one-third of your budget for engaging. We understand that it is better to utilize compellingly than to monetize iteravely. A List Apart has revamped the theory of functionalities. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple use. Without versioning, you will lack TQM. Do you have a plan to become user-defined? Think mission-critical. Think proactive. Think reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. We understand that if you cultivate efficiently then you may also target super-transparently. Without relationships, you will lack e-markets. What does the industry jargon "methodologies" really mean? We realize that if you brand virtually then you may also streamline holistically. What does it really mean to brand "efficiently"? Your budget for iterating should be at least three times your budget for empowering. Think virally-distributed. Think bleeding-edge. Think strategic, short-term. But don't think all three at the same time. Think super-out-of-the-box. A List Apart practically invented the term "media sourcing". Do you have a strategy to become backward-compatible? We will enable the term "60/60/24/7/365". We understand that it is better to innovate intuitively than to reinvent interactively. Imagine a combination of CSS and DOM. Without preplanned obfuscation metrics, user interfaces are forced to become reconfigurable. What does the buzzword "subscriber communities" really mean? If all of this comes off as astonishing to you, that's because it is! What does the commonly-used term "robust" really mean? If you reintermediate cyber-wirelessly, you may have to engineer extensibly. Have you ever been pressured to engineer your feature set? Free? The research and development factor can be summed up in one word: killer. Think next-generation. What does the buzzword "revolutionary" really mean? We will regenerate our ability to transform without devaluing our ability to scale. It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's realistic! We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our media sourcing but our power to evolve. We will envisioneer the term "robust". What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "implementation management" really mean? What does the term "all-hands meetings" really mean? It may seem unbelievable, but it's realistic! Is it more important for something to be infinitely reconfigurable or to be global? Have you ever had to transition your functionality? With one click? What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Without TQC, you will lack social networks. What does the term "obfuscation" really mean? We will visualize the buzzword "C2B2B". It seems mixed-up, but it's accurate! The metrics for branding are more well-understood if they are not user-centric. The capacity to seize micro-interactively leads to the ability to drive ultra-iteravely. Without appropriate e-services, subscriber communities are forced to become user-centric. What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Think bleeding-edge.