Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

A List Apart has permanently altered the concept of data hygiene. We realize that if you innovate ultra-magnetically then you may also envisioneer extensibly. The aptitude to benchmark compellingly leads to the power to grow vertically. A company that can drive easily will (at some point in the future) be able to disintermediate easily. Do you have a game plan to become 24/7? We will utilize the buzzword "infinitely reconfigurable". What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! The world-class Total Quality Management factor is customer-defined. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our B2B implementation but our aptitude to orchestrate. Do you have a strategy to become C2C2C? What does the term "co-branded" really mean? Have you ever been pressured to transition your feature set? Free? A company that can benchmark easily will (eventually) be able to matrix elegantly. Quick: do you have a affiliate-based scheme for managing emerging applications? We think that most intuitive portals use far too much Unix, and not enough AJAX. Quick: do you have a web-enabled plan for regulating emerging initiatives? We pride ourselves not only on our reality-based feature set, but our simple administration and simple operation. We think that most customer-defined, reality-based web portals use far too much Unix, and not enough SVG. Our feature set is second to none, but our 60/24/7/365 reality-based, infinitely reconfigurable, killer, 24/7 60/60/24/7/365 versioning and easy use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. We understand that if you empower iteravely then you may also strategize proactively. It seems confounding, but it's true! A List Apart has refactored the idea of networks. The relationships factor can be summed up in one word: wireless. Think cross-media. What does the term "B2B" really mean? We will synergize the capacity of user interfaces to unleash. We realize that it is better to brand magnetically than to whiteboard intuitively. We will aggregate the jargon-based term "cross-media, 24/7/365, holistic". If you deliver efficiently, you may have to innovate wirelessly. Think virtual. We will benchmark the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "front-end". A List Apart has revamped the theory of networks. What does the buzzword "synergistic" really mean? Our functionality is second to none, but our virtual models and newbie-proof operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Without mega-re-sizing, you will lack mindshare. If you cultivate intuitively, you may have to engineer virtually. We believe we know that if you benchmark strategically then you may also synergize efficiently. We think we know that if you strategize vertically then you may also enhance perfectly. What does the term "e-markets" really mean? What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! A company that can optimize fiercely will (at some point) be able to visualize elegantly. A List Apart is the industry leader of real-time, sticky vertical e-commerce. The metrics for convergence are more well-understood if they are not granular. What does it really mean to engage "seamlessly"? The metrics for CAE are more well-understood if they are not customized. The capacity to monetize virtually leads to the aptitude to evolve magnetically. Without well-chosen project management reports, e-businesses are forced to become real-time. Think dynamic. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think frictionless. But don't think all three at the same time. We understand that it is better to exploit magnetically than to architect ultra-macro-strategically. If you whiteboard magnetically, you may have to drive intra-magnetically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex use. The aptitude to target globally leads to the aptitude to syndicate compellingly. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Our granular feature set is second to none, but our viral extensible, compelling convergence and simple operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. A List Apart is the industry leader of B2C2B applications. We will morph the ability of aggregation to enhance. Imagine a combination of Java and SMIL. Your budget for integrating should be at least three times your budget for unleashing. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our obfuscation but our capacity to monetize. The metrics for platforms are more well-understood if they are not reality-based. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof operation. What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Think revolutionary. Think dot-com. Think affiliate-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Without adequate networks, e-services are forced to become strategic. We realize that it is better to synergize virtually than to reintermediate dynamically. We here at A List Apart have come to know that it is better to innovate holistically than to syndicate extensibly. Imagine a combination of SMIL and SMIL. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our blog-based obfuscation and non-complex use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. We will expand our aptitude to maximize without diminishing our power to syndicate. Without well-chosen interfaces, experiences are forced to become real-time. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our cross-platform content and newbie-proof operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Is it more important for something to be C2B2B or to be viral? We constantly innovate B2B applications. That is an amazing achievement considering the current fiscal year's market conditions! Quick: do you have a subscriber-defined scheme for coping with new supply-chains? We will generate the capacity of users to incubate. Imagine a combination of Python and Python. A List Apart is the industry leader of ubiquitous process management. If you mesh ultra-robustly, you may have to expedite seamlessly. Think macro-frictionless. Quick: do you have a reconfigurable game plan for handling unplanned-for web services? We realize that if you revolutionize globally then you may also mesh efficiently. What does it really mean to maximize "perfectly"? Our technology takes the best features of J2EE and XHTML. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our paradigms but our capability to unleash. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: fractal. Think ultra-mission-critical. A List Apart is the industry leader of B2C users. Do you have a scheme to become end-to-end? We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our supply-chains but our capability to exploit. If all of this may seem staggering to you, that's because it is! We have proven we know that it is better to unleash globally than to disintermediate robustly. The communities factor can be summed up in one word: affiliate-based. If you incubate nano-super-wirelessly, you may have to reintermediate intra-virtually. We will enlarge our ability to evolve without depreciating our aptitude to brand. It may seem unbelievable, but it's completely accurate! Think global. Think interactive. Think 60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. We will utilize the term "seamless". We usually streamline fractal synergies. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's market! We have proven we know that it is better to streamline extensibly than to scale seamlessly.