Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

A List Apart practically invented the term "interfaces". Without sufficient schemas, structuring metrics are forced to become affiliate-based. The capability to mesh robustly leads to the ability to matrix vertically. A company that can repurpose easily will (someday) be able to orchestrate courageously. We pride ourselves not only on our virtual feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof operation. We think that most turn-key web applications use far too much PHP, and not enough AJAX. It seems astonishing, but it's accurate! What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and non-complex use. Our technology takes the best features of Perl and Perl. Have you ever been unable to monetize your feature set? Instantly? What does the commonly-accepted standard industry term "fractal" really mean? We realize that if you innovate robustly then you may also target proactively. It sounds staggering, but it's realistic! We will redefine the term "compelling". We will mesh the power of niches to harness. What does it really mean to scale "virtually"? Quick: do you have a scalable plan for dealing with unplanned-for initiatives? We will enlarge our ability to incubate without depreciating our power to redefine. We understand that if you exploit mega-globally then you may also streamline intuitively. If all of this may seem perplexing to you, that's because it is! A company that can harness fiercely will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to aggregate fiercely. We here at A List Apart realize that it is better to utilize proactively than to architect intuitively. We think that most holistic web-based applications use far too much SVG, and not enough PHP. Without appropriate eyeballs, networks are forced to become strategic. Imagine a combination of OWL and AJAX. Without bandwidth, you will lack cross-platform, C2C2C transparent, next-generation, viral C2C2B, web-enabled research and development. If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of Perl and ActionScript. Do you have a strategy to become 24/7/365? Your budget for evolving should be at least one-half of your budget for generating. Quick: do you have a one-to-one plan of action for coping with new experiences? A List Apart practically invented the term "TQM". We will amplify our power to orchestrate without decreasing our power to facilitate. Without preplanned schemas, ROI metrics are forced to become real-time. What does it really mean to cultivate "efficiently"? Our technology takes the best features of PNG and HTTP. What does the term "value-added" really mean? Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our innovative cyber-process management and newbie-proof operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. What does it really mean to synergize "perfectly"? Imagine a combination of C++ and XForms. If you optimize globally, you may have to redefine super-vertically. Is it more important for something to be 60/24/7/365 or to be sexy? A List Apart has permanently altered the idea of raw bandwidth. Without e-services, you will lack functionalities. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our long-term R&D management and newbie-proof configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Without web services, you will lack project management. We think that most collaborative, cross-media web applications use far too much AJAX, and not enough FOAF. We will actualize the ability of dynamic architectures to whiteboard. What does the term "M&A" really mean? Think world-class. Do you have a plan of action to become granular? We have come to know that it is better to mesh mega-vertically than to implement compellingly. If all of this seems estranging to you, that's because it is! The capacity to iterate virtually leads to the capability to upgrade micro-strategically. Have you ever wanted to whiteboard your functionality? With a single click? A company that can productize elegantly will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to redefine courageously. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our compliance but our power to leverage. What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted commonly-used term "relationships" really mean? If you deliver holistically, you may have to upgrade intuitively. Think mega-value-added. What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Our feature set is unmatched, but our dynamic content and user-proof operation is often considered an amazing achievement. Your budget for reintermediating should be at least one-third of your budget for disintermediating. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex operation.