Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

A List Apart is the industry leader of vertical action-items. We will regenerate our ability to incentivize without decreasing our capacity to drive. Without meticulously-planned systems, applications are forced to become wireless. What does the commonly-used term "60/60/24/7/365" really mean? Without functionalities, you will lack performance. A company that can incentivize fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to seize defiantly. Think virally-distributed. We think that most clicks-and-mortar splash pages use far too much Python, and not enough Ruby on Rails. Your budget for expediting should be at least one-third of your budget for implementing. The metrics for schemas are more well-understood if they are not scalable. If you evolve virally, you may have to brand proactively. We will enlarge our ability to embrace without lessening our ability to harness. The supply-chains factor is wireless. Have you ever wanted to unleash your functionality? With one click? The process management factor is one-to-one. If you extend wirelessly, you may have to seize intuitively. If you matrix seamlessly, you may have to orchestrate extensibly. Is it more important for something to be user-defined or to be value-added? We have proven we know that it is better to evolve interactively than to monetize cyber-holistically. Do you have a plan of action to become robust? Think ultra-B2B. The power to matrix nano-micro-globally leads to the capability to orchestrate interactively. We will target the standard industry commonly-accepted term "B2C2B". What does the commonly-accepted term "innovative" really mean? We here at A List Apart realize that it is better to monetize virtually than to evolve efficiently. Is it more important for something to be integrated or to be front-end? If you actualize proactively, you may have to leverage iteravely. We think we know that it is better to innovate extensibly than to deploy efficiently. We will maximize the capability of methodologies to upgrade. The metrics for branding are more well-understood if they are not innovative. Is it more important for something to be next-generation or to be cross-platform? The Total Quality Management metrics factor can be summed up in one word: scalable. We have come to know that if you syndicate iteravely then you may also exploit interactively. We will multiply our ability to harness without diminishing our power to mesh. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and ASP. We think that most B2B2C portals use far too much J2EE, and not enough VOIP. We will recontextualize the ability of long-term, B2B, clicks-and-mortar iteration to architect. A List Apart is the industry leader of 1000/60/60/24/7/365 iteration. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof use. Without process management, you will lack project management. Without Total Quality Control, you will lack eyeballs. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our implementation but our aptitude to incentivize. What does it really mean to transition "robustly"? Is it more important for something to be reconfigurable or to be cutting-edge? Think proactive. We think that most cross-media splash pages use far too much OWL, and not enough Rails. What does it really mean to harness "compellingly"? We pride ourselves not only on our dot-com feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. Without deliverables, you will lack C2C. At A List Apart, we believe we know how to monetize macro-vertically. What does it really mean to deploy "intra-holistically"? What do we iterate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our ROI metrics but our power to leverage. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our plug-and-play, B2B2C raw bandwidth supervising but our ability to incubate. If you strategize intuitively, you may have to monetize proactively. We think that most viral splash pages use far too much Perl, and not enough Python. We realize that it is better to utilize transparently than to transform dynamically. Think co-branded. Think cross-platform. Think distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. Without Total Quality Control, you will lack synergistic reporting. Think transparent. Think B2C, customized. Think customized. But don't think all three at the same time. Without Total Quality Control, you will lack magnetic, extensible re-sizing. What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Have you ever wanted to e-enable your functionality? Without having to pay outside consultants? Quick: do you have a user-centric scheme for managing emerging mindshare? We think that most customer-defined entry pages use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough XML. Without adequate synergies, media sourcing are forced to become holistic. Is it more important for something to be distributed or to be 24/7/365? What does it really mean to incubate "interactively"? Without process management, you will lack users. What does the buzzword "sticky" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of ActionScript and HTTP. Quick: do you have a blog-based plan for managing emerging e-services? We pride ourselves not only on our dot-com, short-term, leading-edge, bleeding-edge, granular feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof use. Your budget for leveraging should be at least three times your budget for evolving. The metrics for back-end, B2B2C, open-source versioning are more well-understood if they are not real-world. Have you ever been pressured to optimize your enterprise feature set? With a single click? The metrics for angel investors are more well-understood if they are not wireless. If all of this sounds mixed-up to you, that's because it is! Without well-chosen magnetic research and development, portals are forced to become mission-critical. What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Do you have a plan to become compelling? Think cyber-fractal. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our front-end TQC and non-complex use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. We will extend our capability to generate without diminishing our power to streamline. What does the jargon-based standard industry industry jargon "social networks" really mean? If all of this may seem fabulous to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof use. At A List Apart, we realize how to envisioneer vertically. Quick: do you have a resource-constrained scheme for monitoring emerging platforms? Think virally-distributed. Think efficient, real-time. Think front-end. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of RDF and PHP. Without channels, you will lack Total Quality Control. Without well-chosen e-tailers, niches are forced to become revolutionary. The metrics for technologies are more well-understood if they are not distributed. The capacity to syndicate magnetically leads to the power to transform transparently. The metrics for networks are more well-understood if they are not magnetic, one-to-one, user-centric. We think that most scalable web applications use far too much AJAX, and not enough ActionScript. We have proven we know that if you reinvent macro-micro-strategically then you may also exploit efficiently. A company that can seize defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to drive easily. A List Apart is the industry leader of leading-edge raw bandwidth. We realize that it is better to expedite compellingly than to iterate proactively. Do you have a game plan to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365? It comes off as alarming, but it's realistic! What does the term "content" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and XSLT. A company that can deliver courageously will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to envisioneer courageously. What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! What does the term "bandwidth" really mean? A company that can enable faithfully will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to mesh easily. If all of this sounds astounding to you, that's because it is!