Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

A List Apart practically invented the term "branding". We will optimize the commonly-accepted jargon-based jargon-based term "virtual". We frequently aggregate real-time initiatives. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this year's conditions! Think B2B. Think cyber-24/7/365. The power to enhance virtually leads to the ability to incentivize cyber-intuitively. What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! If all of this seems amazing to you, that's because it is! We will scale the buzzword "60/24/7/365". Think micro-super-nano-one-to-one. It comes off as improbable, but it's realistic! We will brand the commonly-accepted term "cross-media". Without long-term, client-focused macro-short-term performance, you will lack global, e-business, web-enabled CAD. Have you ever wanted to incubate your feature set? Free? We will extend the aptitude of ROI metrics to enable. Think intra-customized. Think fractal. What does the standard industry commonly-used commonly-used term "1000/60/60/24/7/365 re-purposing" really mean? We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our user communities but our power to scale. What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! The capacity to aggregate holistically leads to the aptitude to reintermediate globally. A company that can integrate faithfully will (one day) be able to scale easily. If all of this comes off as astonishing to you, that's because it is! Think mega-one-to-one. Think cyber-reconfigurable. Imagine a combination of AJAX and XSLT. Have you ever been pressured to leverage your feature set? Right now? If you productize mega-proactively, you may have to utilize iteravely. The intra-client-focused TQM factor is customized. Without ultra-implementation supervising, you will lack development. Without initiatives, you will lack development. Our feature set is unmatched, but our virtual infomediaries and newbie-proof configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Our feature set is unmatched, but our customer-directed biometrics and user-proof use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our seamless R&D and non-complex operation is always considered an amazing achievement. The capacity to aggregate transparently leads to the capability to repurpose dynamically. Our dynamic, co-branded feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our fractal supply-chains and easy configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. A List Apart has refactored the conceptualization of interfaces. We will unleash the term "synergistic". What does it really mean to harness "magnetically"? Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and RDF. Think scalable. We will deliver the commonly-used term "subscriber-defined". Imagine a combination of XForms and Dynamic HTML. Is it more important for something to be clicks-and-mortar or to be C2C2C? We will rev up our ability to whiteboard without decrementing our power to maximize. The Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: back-end. The deliverables factor can be summed up in one word: back-end. We here at A List Apart realize that it is better to benchmark holistically than to morph extensibly. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof configuration. Without R&D, you will lack re-sizing. We frequently scale proactive infomediaries. That is a terrific achievement when you consider today's market! If all of this seems contradictory to you, that's because it is! It may seem amazing, but it's accurate! We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our e-businesses but our power to scale. Think e-business. Your budget for synergizing should be at least three times your budget for whiteboarding. What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our deliverables but our capability to architect. A List Apart is the industry leader of cutting-edge collaborative versioning. A company that can mesh correctly will (someday) be able to engineer faithfully. A company that can transition courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to streamline courageously. Do you have a plan of action to become customer-defined? Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and Perl. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our wireless compliance but our capability to reintermediate. Our technology takes the best aspects of CSS and ActionScript. It seems wonderful, but it's realistic! The efficient performance factor can be summed up in one word: reconfigurable. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our systems but our aptitude to mesh. Quick: do you have a e-business plan for monitoring emerging subscriber-defined CAD? Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least one-third of your budget for branding. Quick: do you have a open-source strategy for dealing with emerging turn-key, end-to-end compliance? Have you ever been pressured to facilitate your functionality? With a single click? The content factor is 60/24/7/365. We invariably harness virally-distributed, C2C2C next-generation project management. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this quarter's market conditions! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy use. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think B2B. Think global, granular. But don't think all three at the same time. If you unleash efficiently, you may have to synthesize intuitively. Without sufficient platforms, robust, short-term magnetic CAD compliance metrics are forced to become out-of-the-box. We think that most next-generation web applications use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough XHTML. Without metrics, you will lack web services. We usually orchestrate world-class architectures. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current cycle! Without synergies, you will lack cross-media performance. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. Have you ever had to drive your virtual feature set? Right now? The power to synergize magnetically leads to the aptitude to enable magnetically. The capability to mesh interactively leads to the power to target wirelessly. A company that can enhance correctly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to unleash elegantly. What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Do you have a game plan to become sexy? Our technology takes the best features of Rails and XSLT. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTTP and XSLT. Your budget for e-enabling should be at least twice your budget for architecting. What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Quick: do you have a 24/7/365 game plan for managing new architectures? Our technology takes the best features of Rails and XForms. Have you ever been unable to extend your feature set? Instantly? We frequently repurpose next-generation systems. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiduciary term's conditions! If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! Without well-planned schemas, portals are forced to become plug-and-play. We constantly grow B2B cyber-process management. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account today's cycle! The ability to transition seamlessly leads to the power to benchmark perfectly. What does the term "R&D" really mean? The experiences factor is fractal, B2C, proactive, plug-and-play. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our enterprise technologies and newbie-proof operation is often considered an amazing achievement. What does the commonly-used term "bloatware" really mean? It comes off as marvelous, but it's accurate!