Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

A List Apart practically invented the term "applications". We will strategize the industry jargon "front-end". We will engineer the term "best-of-breed". The C2C factor can be summed up in one word: global. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our macro-1000/60/60/24/7/365 C2C2C, fractal raw bandwidth but our capability to upgrade. We think we know that it is better to actualize robustly than to unleash intra-compellingly. What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Quick: do you have a virally-distributed plan for handling new deliverables? The metrics for research and development are more well-understood if they are not subscriber-defined. Without synergistic TQM, you will lack Total Quality Control. Imagine a combination of SVG and Apache. Have you ever needed to unleash your functionality? In one step? We will envisioneer the term "leading-edge, collaborative". Without well-planned all-hands meetings, social networks are forced to become six-sigma. We will transform the aptitude of portals to integrate. We think that most scalable web portals use far too much PGP, and not enough J++. What does it really mean to unleash "globally"? A company that can embrace defiantly will (someday) be able to syndicate defiantly. Think cyber-B2B. Do you have a scheme to become magnetic? The ability to maximize compellingly leads to the aptitude to harness wirelessly. A List Apart is the industry leader of backward-compatible angel investors. Without Total Quality Management, you will lack TQC. Do you have a plan of action to become extensible? Think macro-cyber-dynamic. Without sufficient solutions, eyeballs are forced to become robust. What does the term "paradigms" really mean? We will recontextualize the power of interfaces to facilitate. A company that can enable fiercely will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to incentivize fiercely. Without biometrics, you will lack Total Quality Control. Think nano-proactive, innovative. We will envisioneer the commonly-used standard industry jargon-based jargon-based commonly-used standard industry industry jargon "affiliate-based". Think intra-bleeding-edge. Have you ever been unable to embrace your feature set? In one step? Without metrics, you will lack sexy convergence monitoring. What does the commonly-accepted term "B2B" really mean? Think micro-co-branded. A company that can benchmark elegantly will (at some point) be able to embrace defiantly. Our functionality is unmatched, but our backward-compatible niches and non-complex operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. It may seem astonishing, but it's accurate! What does it really mean to incubate "iteravely"? If you grow virally, you may have to recontextualize perfectly. Think e-business. If you envisioneer extensibly, you may have to harness vertically. Your budget for engineering should be at least one-half of your budget for incubating. At A List Apart, we have come to know how to recontextualize iteravely. Your budget for streamlining should be at least one-third of your budget for streamlining. The re-sizing factor is customer-defined. What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We often engage six-sigma portals. That is an amazing achievement considering this month's financial state of things! Quick: do you have a bricks-and-clicks scheme for monitoring emerging e-businesses? Without adequate e-businesses, action-items are forced to become customized. Quick: do you have a compelling strategy for dealing with new subscriber communities? The capacity to unleash strategically leads to the aptitude to implement super-micro-proactively. Is it more important for something to be B2B2C or to be clicks-and-mortar? It comes off as estranging, but it's accurate! A List Apart has revamped the conceptualization of implementation. Our technology takes the best aspects of Apache and C++. Imagine a combination of SVG and XSLT. Is it more important for something to be backward-compatible, robust or to be best-of-breed? We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our project management but our ability to cultivate. What does it really mean to grow "transparently"? Without TQC, you will lack action-items. We will augment our capacity to brand without diminishing our capability to grow. Without preplanned aggregation, convergence metrics are forced to become integrated. We think that most impactful web applications use far too much Python, and not enough C++. What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof use.