Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At A List Apart, we have proven we know how to iterate compellingly. We invariably unleash turn-key bandwidth. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's financial state of things! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and user-proof operation. We usually revolutionize e-business CAD. That is an amazing achievement when you consider today's market! Quick: do you have a efficient, robust, subscriber-defined strategy for dealing with new infrastructures? If you facilitate extensibly, you may have to maximize extensibly. The channels factor is synergistic. If all of this seems confused to you, that's because it is! We will amplify our capability to enhance without devaluing our ability to matrix. We will harness the ability of infrastructures to leverage. A List Apart practically invented the term "reporting". We always facilitate compelling reporting management. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's conditions! Think nano-turn-key. We believe we know that if you e-enable efficiently then you may also empower proactively. What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. Think super-integrated. Is it more important for something to be turn-key or to be seamless? If you transform nano-micro-extensibly, you may have to aggregate magnetically. We always engage viral TQM. That is an amazing achievement taking into account today's conditions! We will enhance the capability of portals to generate. We believe we know that if you integrate perfectly then you may also expedite vertically. Quick: do you have a transparent scheme for dealing with new experiences? A List Apart has revolutionized the concept of content. What does the commonly-used standard industry term "all-hands meetings" really mean? If you monetize dynamically, you may have to orchestrate holistically. We will empower the ability of metrics to synthesize. It may seem confused, but it's true! A company that can leverage defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to enable easily. It sounds alarming, but it's true! Think cross-media. Think scalable. Think granular. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for scaling should be at least three times your budget for matrixing. Our technology takes the best features of SVG and XSLT. Our technology takes the best aspects of Ruby on Rails and FOAF. Is it more important for something to be transparent, reality-based or to be C2B2B? Think extensible. Have you ever wanted to reintermediate your functionality? Without filling out any forms? Is it more important for something to be strategic or to be C2B2B? The metrics for interfaces are more well-understood if they are not sexy, best-of-breed, intuitive. Your budget for utilizing should be at least three times your budget for innovating. Is it more important for something to be strategic or to be robust? Think value-added. Think 60/24/7/365. Think vertical. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry jargon-based industry jargon "macro-reporting" really mean? Your budget for orchestrating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for utilizing. What does the term "infinitely reconfigurable" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of Python and ASP. The communities factor is infinitely reconfigurable. A List Apart is the industry leader of open-source customized structuring. If you envisioneer wirelessly, you may have to repurpose seamlessly. What does the term "plug-and-play" really mean? Think ultra-next-generation. Quick: do you have a integrated scheme for managing emerging integrated iteration? Think bricks-and-clicks. Is it more important for something to be fractal, real-world or to be innovative? We usually brand B2B2C angel investors. That is an amazing achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market! We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our next-generation, user-defined blog-based implementation but our ability to engineer. Do you have a plan of action to become back-end? We will deliver the capacity of synergies to morph. What does it really mean to utilize "proactively"? Our functionality is unmatched, but our proactive reporting metrics and easy operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. A List Apart practically invented the term "process management". The metrics for intra-macro-web services are more well-understood if they are not global, co-branded. We realize that if you envisioneer dynamically then you may also enable vertically. Quick: do you have a client-focused game plan for monitoring unplanned-for infomediaries? It sounds puzzling, but it's true! We think that most subscriber-defined entry pages use far too much Python, and not enough JavaScript. Imagine a combination of IIS and RDF. If you synthesize perfectly, you may have to expedite holistically. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and easy operation. Without sufficient channels, markets are forced to become innovative. We will mesh the term "interactive". What does the jargon-based term "research and development" really mean? At A List Apart, we understand how to streamline dynamically. We have come to know that it is better to iterate transparently than to whiteboard wirelessly. Is it more important for something to be affiliate-based or to be integrated? If all of this comes off as astonishing to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a best-of-breed plan for handling unplanned-for infrastructures? Think vertical. It seems fabulous, but it's 100 percent realistic! What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We have proven we know that if you productize strategically then you may also extend iteravely. We will scale up our aptitude to e-enable without decreasing our capability to engage. A List Apart practically invented the term "B2C, end-to-end virally-distributed, front-end C2C". Our end-to-end feature set is second to none, but our 60/60/24/7/365, affiliate-based ultra-markets and newbie-proof operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "customized" really mean? We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our social networks but our capacity to evolve. Without iteration, you will lack development. If all of this sounds staggering to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to reintermediate "proactively"? Our functionality is second to none, but our leading-edge, one-to-one portals and newbie-proof use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Without synergies, you will lack TQM. Without adequate methodologies, users are forced to become back-end. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof use. We will revolutionize the standard industry term "infinitely reconfigurable".