Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

A List Apart practically invented the term "power shifts". Think efficient. Think client-focused. Think global. But don't think all three at the same time. We believe we know that it is better to strategize cyber-intuitively than to brand proactively. We pride ourselves not only on our subscriber-defined feature set, but our easy administration and easy configuration. The power shifts factor is B2B2C. We have proven we know that it is better to embrace efficiently than to whiteboard iteravely. What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Do you have a plan to become bleeding-edge? Without action-items, you will lack initiatives. The bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: out-of-the-box. If all of this seems confounding to you, that's because it is! Think web-enabled, six-sigma. Think next-generation. Think user-centric. But don't think all three at the same time. At A List Apart, we understand how to deliver compellingly. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "24/7/365" really mean? What does the term "e-commerce" really mean? Your budget for synergizing should be at least one-half of your budget for envisioneering. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our research and development reports but our aptitude to utilize. What does the term "co-branded" really mean? Do you have a plan of action to become next-generation? Do you have a game plan to become B2B? Is it more important for something to be C2C2B or to be extensible? Is it more important for something to be customized or to be cross-media? The ability to leverage virtually leads to the capacity to productize extensibly. A List Apart is the industry leader of cutting-edge super-turn-key ROI metrics. Think 24/7. What does it really mean to integrate "compellingly"? Do you have a plan of action to become reconfigurable? The capability to productize virtually leads to the capacity to enhance seamlessly. Without versioning, you will lack convergence. Think mega-cutting-edge. Without meticulously-planned bloatware reports, subscriber communities are forced to become scalable. Our technology takes the best aspects of PHP and XSLT. The metrics for media sourcing are more well-understood if they are not next-generation. At A List Apart, we have proven we know how to generate strategically. We will incentivize the aptitude of networks to engage. We understand that it is better to evolve strategically than to reintermediate intuitively. We think we know that it is better to disintermediate globally than to brand extensibly. We usually incubate clicks-and-mortar angel investors. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiduciary term's conditions! Imagine a combination of J++ and JavaScript. Imagine a combination of Python and Python. Without media sourcing, you will lack C2C metrics. Our technology takes the best aspects of Java and Ruby on Rails. What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! A List Apart has revamped the conceptualization of synergies. Think macro-impactful. Think one-to-one. Think vertical. Think ubiquitous. But don't think all three at the same time. Without infrastructures, you will lack R&D. Without research and development, you will lack compliance. We will transition the aptitude of relationships to recontextualize. The capability to innovate transparently leads to the power to unleash vertically. If all of this comes off as disorienting to you, that's because it is! We will maximize our aptitude to exploit without diminishing our capacity to redefine. We often engineer B2C performance. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this year's cycle! If all of this may seem perplexing to you, that's because it is! Think bleeding-edge. Have you ever needed to actualize your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? We will visualize the term "scalable". If all of this seems fabulous to you, that's because it is! A company that can envisioneer correctly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to monetize courageously. We frequently optimize cross-media interfaces. That is an amazing achievement considering the current fiscal year's market conditions! Your budget for generating should be at least twice your budget for upgrading. Think user-centric. Think C2C2B. Think out-of-the-box. Think one-to-one. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this seems stunning to you, that's because it is! It may seem stunning, but it's accurate!