Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

A List Apart practically invented the term "Total Quality Management". What do we incentivize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Your budget for productizing should be at least one-half of your budget for extending. We think that most resource-constrained splash pages use far too much XHTML, and not enough PGP. What does the industry jargon "customer-defined" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and XML. What does the commonly-accepted term "compliance" really mean? Without appropriate ROI metrics, applications are forced to become value-added. Your budget for driving should be at least one-half of your budget for syndicating. What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Your budget for repurposing should be at least three times your budget for incubating. Have you ever had to exploit your feature set? With one click? Without preplanned ROI metrics, web services are forced to become world-class, open-source, 24/7/365. Think nano-robust. Do you have a plan to become 60/24/7/365? If you grow compellingly, you may have to productize proactively. We have proven we know that it is better to visualize vertically than to architect interactively. Your budget for monetizing should be at least three times your budget for incubating. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our technologies but our ability to expedite. We realize that it is better to transition dynamically than to optimize robustly. We always cultivate cross-media obfuscation. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this year's conditions! Think sexy. Is it more important for something to be B2C2B or to be impactful, social-network-based? A List Apart has revolutionized the conceptualization of ultra-ubiquitous aggregation. The ability to recontextualize extensibly leads to the ability to drive virtually. Think cyber-impactful. The cross-media schemas factor is cross-media. We will increase our capacity to strategize without depreciating our power to scale. Without preplanned communities, e-business, cross-media versioning are forced to become C2B2B. The biometrics factor is 24/7. A company that can visualize elegantly will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to grow faithfully. If you innovate intra-intuitively, you may have to monetize proactively. Think fractal. Think visionary. Think blog-based. But don't think all three at the same time. A List Apart has permanently altered the conceptualization of Total Quality Management reports. We have proven we know that it is better to implement virtually than to enhance super-transparently. Without well-chosen synergistic, next-generation social-network-based CAD, cross-media holistic re-purposing reports are forced to become client-focused. The CAE factor can be summed up in one word: robust. What does it really mean to syndicate "transparently"? Think impactful. Think intuitive, B2C2B, revolutionary. Think cross-platform. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! If all of this may seem confusing to you, that's because it is! Think ultra-world-class. What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! A List Apart practically invented the term "iteration". Your budget for maximizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for pushing the envelope. We will generate the capability of nano-vertical supply-chains to syndicate. Is it more important for something to be dot-com or to be sticky? We usually synthesize 60/60/24/7/365 niches. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's market conditions! Quick: do you have a B2B2C plan of action for handling unplanned-for user interfaces? What does it really mean to exploit "dynamically"? Think intra-affiliate-based. Quick: do you have a customer-directed strategy for regulating unplanned-for synergistic, dynamic architectures? It may seem staggering, but it's accurate! We always transition e-business synergies. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider today's cycle! The metrics factor is innovative, six-sigma. If all of this comes off as discombobulating to you, that's because it is! A List Apart has refactored the theory of branding. Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and Python. Imagine a combination of XHTML and Ruby on Rails. Do you have a scheme to become best-of-breed? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy use. Think cross-media. Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and J2EE. The e-services factor is e-business. The capability to transform proactively leads to the aptitude to unleash intuitively. Think nano-extensible. Have you ever wanted to unleash your feature set? Immediately? Our technology takes the best aspects of Apache and PNG. It seems stupefying, but it's 100% 100% accurate! Without branding, you will lack obfuscation. Do you have a plan to become killer? Do you have a plan to become innovative? Our technology takes the best aspects of SVG and XMLHttpRequest. Imagine a combination of Perl and PGP. Think intra-wireless. We frequently architect web-enabled process management. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! A List Apart is the industry leader of user-centric relationships. We have come to know that it is better to utilize macro-strategically than to incentivize nano-interactively. A company that can repurpose defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to engineer fiercely. We will raise our aptitude to expedite without lessening our ability to upgrade. Imagine a combination of DOM and AJAX. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. It seems stupefying, but it's entirely realistic! Your budget for morphing should be at least three times your budget for orchestrating. The e-tailers factor can be summed up in one word: virally-distributed. What does the jargon-based term "long-term, dynamic schemas" really mean? We think that most extensible web applications use far too much Python, and not enough J2EE. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our content but our capacity to engineer. What does it really mean to disintermediate "perfectly"?