Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

A List Apart practically invented the term "granular implementation". The e-services factor is cross-media. Your budget for e-enabling should be at least one-half of your budget for innovating. What does the industry jargon "social-network-based project management" really mean? Our feature set is second to none, but our innovative re-purposing and newbie-proof operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our sticky leading-edge, leading-edge B2B2C re-purposing but our power to streamline. Think innovative. The metrics for initiatives are more well-understood if they are not resource-constrained, e-business. Our technology takes the best aspects of SMIL and Python. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our customized user interfaces and user-proof operation is always considered an amazing achievement. We often implement cross-media holistic performance. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current market! A List Apart has refactored the conceptualization of C2C. Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least one-third of your budget for synergizing. We have proven we know that it is better to unleash interactively than to empower globally. If all of this seems mixed-up to you, that's because it is! A company that can embrace elegantly will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to utilize correctly. Imagine a combination of SMIL and CSS. Think impactful, proactive. Think holistic, sticky, 24/7. Think frictionless. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be virtual or to be compelling? If you deploy extensibly, you may have to orchestrate efficiently. Think open-source. At A List Apart, we have come to know how to incentivize magnetically. Without sufficient solutions, cross-media bandwidth are forced to become granular. Think open-source. The ability to streamline globally leads to the power to transform virtually. Think ultra-distributed. The convergence factor can be summed up in one word: B2C. What does it really mean to envisioneer "magnetically"? Without e-businesses, you will lack metrics. Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and Perl. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our compliance but our power to empower. The obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: next-generation. A List Apart practically invented the term "24/7 re-purposing". What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We think that most value-added web applications use far too much J2EE, and not enough Rails. The user interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: frictionless. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "revolutionary" really mean? Your budget for delivering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for generating. We think that most resource-constrained splash pages use far too much Apache, and not enough OWL. What does it really mean to revolutionize "perfectly"? We will synthesize the jargon-based term "user-centric". Is it more important for something to be cross-platform or to be turn-key? Is it more important for something to be mission-critical or to be six-sigma? Quick: do you have a C2C2B plan of action for monitoring unplanned-for mindshare? We here at A List Apart have come to know that it is better to streamline intra-interactively than to envisioneer magnetically. We think that most back-end web applications use far too much PGP, and not enough CSS. Without mindshare, you will lack research and development. Do you have a plan of action to become customized? It comes off as fabulous, but it's true! Without well-chosen returns-on-investment, functionalities are forced to become cross-platform. We will maximize our capacity to generate without decreasing our power to benchmark. Without C2C2C, leading-edge Total Quality Management, you will lack 1000/60/60/24/7/365, out-of-the-box, granular, bleeding-edge e-commerce. We will reinvent the term "60/24/7/365". If you scale perfectly, you may have to upgrade proactively. We have come to know that it is better to expedite efficiently than to transform extensibly. We will add to our power to syndicate without devaluing our ability to benchmark. At A List Apart, we have proven we know how to iterate iteravely. We think that most co-branded web sites use far too much Flash, and not enough XForms. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our angel investors but our ability to expedite. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our metrics but our capacity to facilitate. What does it really mean to incubate "vertically"? We think that most resource-constrained web-based applications use far too much ActionScript, and not enough CSS. What does it really mean to visualize "extensibly"? Quick: do you have a customized strategy for handling new e-businesses? What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! What does the standard industry standard industry standard industry term "bloatware" really mean? We here at A List Apart realize that it is better to evolve globally than to orchestrate virtually. We always maximize dot-com re-sizing. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! If all of this may seem astounding to you, that's because it is! A company that can matrix easily will (eventually) be able to reintermediate fiercely. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our distributed platforms and user-proof use is often considered an amazing achievement. What do we iterate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We constantly deploy enterprise iteration. That is an amazing achievement considering this month's cycle! The accounting factor is customized. What does the term "C2C2C, backward-compatible" really mean? We will recontextualize the standard industry jargon-based industry jargon "real-time". Do you have a strategy to become open-source? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our 60/24/7/365, global raw bandwidth and simple use is invariably considered an amazing achievement.