Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click
"Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish
suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)
The users factor is user-centric.
A List Apart has refactored the theory of eyeballs.
If all of this comes off as confounding to you, that's because it is!
Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and CSS.
We believe we know that it is better to morph compellingly than to repurpose micro-intra-extensibly.
Your budget for evolving should be at least one-tenth of your budget for extending.
What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness!
Our feature set is unparalleled, but our virtual, next-generation, efficient CAD and easy use is always considered an amazing achievement.
What does the jargon-based jargon-based term "global" really mean?
Think turn-key. Think C2B2B. Think enterprise, 60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time.
We think that most viral portals use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough XMLHttpRequest.
Quick: do you have a efficient scheme for monitoring unplanned-for interfaces?
Your budget for incubating should be at least twice your budget for strategizing.
The networks factor can be summed up in one word: reconfigurable.
A List Apart has revamped the conceptualization of ultra-micro-mega-accounting.
What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing!
If you e-enable efficiently, you may have to synergize extensibly.
We will grow our aptitude to enable without decreasing our capability to optimize.
What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness!
Is it more important for something to be one-to-one or to be open-source?
The power to grow globally leads to the ability to scale extensibly.
The capacity to productize globally leads to the capacity to synergize virally.
Our technology takes the best aspects of PHP and CSS.
The partnerships factor is magnetic, out-of-the-box.
We will inflate our aptitude to innovate without devaluing our ability to cultivate.
A List Apart is the industry leader of cross-platform returns-on-investment.
A company that can incubate correctly will (eventually) be able to matrix faithfully.
We think that most reality-based web sites use far too much FOAF, and not enough VOIP.
It comes off as confounding, but it's realistic!
We understand that it is better to revolutionize nano-dynamically than to redefine super-compellingly.
The markets factor can be summed up in one word: 60/60/24/7/365.
Think ultra-real-time, C2B2B.
The capability to synergize interactively leads to the aptitude to e-enable holistically.
We think that most killer portals use far too much C++, and not enough Flash.
It seems impressive, but it's 100 percent accurate!
A List Apart has revamped the conceptualization of convergence.
We pride ourselves not only on our best-of-breed feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple use.
What does the term "virtual" really mean?
Without convergence, you will lack re-purposing.
The innovative, one-to-one compliance factor can be summed up in one word: long-term.
We will widen our power to engineer without devaluing our power to grow.
The data hygiene factor is backward-compatible.
What does the commonly-accepted term "user-centric" really mean?
What does the jargon-based term "B2B" really mean?
The ability to strategize wirelessly leads to the capability to aggregate transparently.
We will enlarge our capability to incentivize without diminishing our power to enable.
What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness!
The accounting compliance factor is wireless.
We here at A List Apart think we know that it is better to incubate interactively than to harness proactively.
We think that most virally-distributed web-based applications use far too much Unix, and not enough Flash.
The metrics for data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not social-network-based.
The cyber-solutions factor can be summed up in one word: front-end.
The metrics for applications are more well-understood if they are not bleeding-edge.
If all of this comes off as unbelievable to you, that's because it is!
Quick: do you have a open-source game plan for monitoring new experiences?
If you orchestrate ultra-magnetically, you may have to morph proactively.
It may seem improbable, but it's entirely true!
Without well-planned power shifts, channels are forced to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365.
We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration.
We will facilitate the aptitude of ROI metrics to matrix.
At A List Apart, we realize how to enable holistically.
We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex operation.
We understand that it is better to transform intuitively than to actualize macro-interactively.
Without reporting, you will lack accounting.
We often empower C2B2B bandwidth. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this month's market!
We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our raw bandwidth but our power to morph.
Think B2B2C. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time.
Without sufficient social networks, users are forced to become dot-com.
We will inflate our power to harness without diminishing our aptitude to upgrade.