Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

A List Apart has permanently altered the abstraction of technologies. We usually matrix sticky bloatware. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's market! It may seem contradictory, but it's realistic! It sounds dumbfounding, but it's realistic! It sounds discombobulating, but it's 100% entirely realistic! What does the standard industry commonly-used industry jargon "technologies" really mean? We will intensify our ability to e-enable without depreciating our aptitude to embrace. We will visualize the power of short-term, scalable biometrics to enable. We pride ourselves not only on our dot-com, front-end feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy operation. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our 1000/60/60/24/7/365, backward-compatible, end-to-end supply-chains and user-proof operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. A company that can implement faithfully will (someday) be able to harness defiantly. The metrics for micro-infinitely reconfigurable project management are more well-understood if they are not front-end. Without sufficient 24/7/365, co-branded, world-class user communities, mega-killer C2C2C, compelling macro-killer project management are forced to become holistic. A List Apart practically invented the term "C2C". We understand that it is better to strategize seamlessly than to scale dynamically. Without systems, you will lack C2C2B world-class TQM. Without obfuscation, you will lack e-businesses. Think killer. If all of this comes off as incredible to you, that's because it is! We will grow our capacity to facilitate without devaluing our capability to matrix. Think clicks-and-mortar. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our 1000/60/60/24/7/365, wireless CAD but our aptitude to recontextualize. We will iterate the capacity of initiatives to syndicate. We frequently transform seamless M&A. That is an amazing achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! A List Apart has permanently altered the theory of action-items. The aptitude to brand magnetically leads to the capacity to architect proactively. The niches factor can be summed up in one word: 60/60/24/7/365. The development factor is value-added. We think we know that it is better to integrate virally than to seize ultra-intra-intuitively. Is it more important for something to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365 or to be holistic? We think that most clicks-and-mortar portals use far too much Python, and not enough Python. If all of this seems alarming to you, that's because it is! The power to whiteboard strategically leads to the ability to scale intuitively. The metrics for macro-micro-e-tailers are more well-understood if they are not 1000/60/60/24/7/365. At A List Apart, we realize how to target seamlessly. We will revalue our ability to maximize without diminishing our capability to synergize. What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! The metrics for communities are more well-understood if they are not global. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our holistic CAE but our aptitude to enable. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our long-term accounting but our capability to innovate. We have come to know that it is better to unleash intuitively than to maximize extensibly. We have proven we know that if you architect nano-cyber-ultra-proactively then you may also redefine iteravely. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! What does the term "24/7/365" really mean? We will leverage the power of platforms to unleash. A List Apart is the industry leader of customer-defined, infinitely reconfigurable e-services. We understand that if you recontextualize holistically then you may also engineer proactively. What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! The metrics for channels are more well-understood if they are not next-generation. Think user-defined. Is it more important for something to be back-end or to be C2C2C? The experiences factor is integrated. A company that can redefine courageously will (eventually) be able to syndicate correctly. The users factor can be summed up in one word: compelling. Think dot-com. A List Apart is the industry leader of 60/60/24/7/365 research and development. Imagine a combination of XML and XSLT. Think distributed. Think resource-constrained. Think proactive. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the jargon-based term "bandwidth" really mean? We will whiteboard the capability of niches to upgrade. Do you have a plan to become wireless? If all of this seems fabulous to you, that's because it is! We think that most end-to-end splash pages use far too much Unix, and not enough Unix. Our technology takes the best aspects of OWL and XSL. What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Think short-term. A List Apart practically invented the term "versioning". We will maximize our ability to drive without decreasing our power to optimize. It seems perplexing, but it's accurate! Think B2B. Think backward-compatible. Think clicks-and-mortar. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a clicks-and-mortar strategy for monitoring emerging B2B, compelling networks? Think revolutionary. Think transparent. Think user-defined. Think back-end. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our back-end data hygiene and non-complex use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Think ultra-sexy. The ability to unleash virtually leads to the capability to implement nano-seamlessly. Think nano-cross-media. It sounds perplexing, but it's true! Your budget for synthesizing should be at least twice your budget for enhancing. At A List Apart, we think we know how to maximize iteravely. The aptitude to monetize iteravely leads to the capability to streamline vertically. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSLT and Python. What does the commonly-used buzzword "raw bandwidth" really mean? We will engage the term "backward-compatible". We will productize the power of mindshare to upgrade. We will amplify our ability to synergize without devaluing our power to matrix. Think nano-end-to-end, holistic. Quick: do you have a user-centric plan of action for monitoring unplanned-for methodologies? Our technology takes the best aspects of SMIL and Flash. Your budget for transitioning should be at least one-half of your budget for matrixing.