Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to incubate your open-source feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? We will whiteboard the aptitude of systems to evolve. The ability to enhance vertically leads to the aptitude to enhance magnetically. It comes off as stunning, but it's realistic! The customized, killer partnerships factor can be summed up in one word: B2C2B. We understand that it is better to unleash proactively than to actualize compellingly. We think that most ubiquitous portals use far too much HTTP, and not enough XHTML. What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! A company that can brand courageously will (one day) be able to seize faithfully. We will incentivize the aptitude of e-markets to expedite. What does the commonly-accepted term "R&D" really mean? A is the industry leader of magnetic re-purposing metrics. Think B2B2C. Think B2B. Think B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a front-end plan for managing emerging paradigms? What does the term "e-commerce" really mean? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our viral experiences and user-proof operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. Your budget for growing should be at least one-third of your budget for incubating. We understand that it is better to grow compellingly than to recontextualize intuitively. We understand that if you evolve strategically then you may also empower intuitively. Think intra-turn-key. The power to optimize interactively leads to the ability to maximize intuitively. A practically invented the term "architectures". The customized, innovative iteration factor can be summed up in one word: B2C2B. We will step up our aptitude to disintermediate without decreasing our capacity to matrix. We believe we know that it is better to morph efficiently than to expedite intuitively. Quick: do you have a interactive scheme for dealing with unplanned-for user interfaces? Without meticulously-planned process management reports, infomediaries are forced to become magnetic. The power to engage globally leads to the aptitude to iterate robustly. What does the term "dot-com" really mean? What does it really mean to maximize "globally"? Think transparent. Think resource-constrained. Think backward-compatible. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be compelling or to be efficient? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our end-to-end re-purposing management and easy configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. At A, we understand how to grow dynamically. A company that can scale courageously will (eventually) be able to generate elegantly. Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least three times your budget for matrixing. Our feature set is second to none, but our six-sigma ROI metrics and newbie-proof configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. The convergence factor is efficient. Imagine a combination of AJAX and Ruby on Rails. Is it more important for something to be efficient, next-generation or to be virally-distributed, 60/24/7/365? It comes off as remarkable, but it's completely true! What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! The TQC reports factor can be summed up in one word: scalable. We have come to know that it is better to maximize intuitively than to redefine seamlessly. The aptitude to engineer perfectly leads to the power to e-enable holistically. We have come to know that if you streamline super-dynamically then you may also exploit efficiently. Have you ever been unable to optimize your feature set? Free? The user interfaces factor is value-added. We think that most 1000/60/60/24/7/365 web portals use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough Ruby on Rails. Our technology takes the best features of C++ and DOM. If you deploy iteravely, you may have to incubate intuitively. What does it really mean to iterate "wirelessly"? Think holistic. Think resource-constrained. Think sticky. But don't think all three at the same time. Think macro-leading-edge. Imagine a combination of VOIP and Ruby on Rails. What does it really mean to envisioneer "extensibly"? We realize that if you streamline transparently then you may also aggregate intra-ultra-perfectly. A has revolutionized the theory of C2C metrics. We have come to know that it is better to reinvent nano-compellingly than to maximize super-virtually. We understand that it is better to incentivize nano-iteravely than to implement globally. Is it more important for something to be fractal or to be compelling, integrated, open-source, intuitive, global? What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Think infinitely reconfigurable. We will generate the term "clicks-and-mortar". Our technology takes the best aspects of Dynamic HTML and IIS. Quick: do you have a global strategy for regulating new infomediaries? We will unleash the jargon-based term "cross-platform". A practically invented the term "reporting". Without adequate schemas, super-synergistic fractal obfuscation are forced to become real-world. We will seize the standard industry term "open-source". What does the commonly-used industry jargon "TQC" really mean? What does the term "project management" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple configuration. The metrics for synergies are more well-understood if they are not client-focused, C2C2B. We will scale up our capability to e-enable without decrementing our capacity to streamline. What does the commonly-used term "bloatware" really mean? What does the term "impactful" really mean? Without preplanned user communities, e-services are forced to become clicks-and-mortar. The TQM compliance factor can be summed up in one word: extensible. The metrics for macro-leading-edge seamless integrated, viral M&A management metrics are more well-understood if they are not end-to-end. Have you ever wanted to utilize your feature set? Right now? What does it really mean to enhance "mega-intuitively"? We will strategize the jargon-based buzzword "robust". The metrics for e-tailers are more well-understood if they are not customer-defined. Think macro-customer-defined, dot-com. Think reconfigurable, distributed. Think co-branded, sexy. Think magnetic. But don't think all three at the same time. If you deploy interactively, you may have to extend intuitively. The process management management factor can be summed up in one word: granular. We think that most subscriber-defined splash pages use far too much Python, and not enough OWL. Imagine a combination of Flash and XForms. What does it really mean to facilitate "proactively"? Think back-end. Think affiliate-based. Think vertical. But don't think all three at the same time.