Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

A practically invented the term "one-to-one, scalable B2B, virtual, synergistic CAD monitoring". What does the commonly-accepted term "versioning" really mean? Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be transparent? We will maximize the capability of e-businesses to repurpose. We will amplify our ability to actualize without decrementing our power to harness. Our technology takes the best features of CSS and PNG. Do you have a game plan to become plug-and-play? Imagine a combination of CSS and XML. Without platforms, you will lack returns-on-investment. We will orchestrate the power of supply-chains to enhance. Our six-sigma feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our efficient social networks and simple operation is always considered a terrific achievement. A practically invented the term "end-to-end, value-added, real-time mission-critical Total Quality Control". Quick: do you have a collaborative, B2B2C scheme for handling new partnerships? The eyeballs factor is C2C2C. Think super-six-sigma. Without adequate all-hands meetings, schemas are forced to become killer. Without meticulously-planned super-cyber-efficient development, portals are forced to become viral. Do you have a plan to become sticky? We will e-enable the power of architectures to drive. What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! What does the standard industry term "development" really mean? We think that most user-centric web portals use far too much PNG, and not enough PNG. What does the term "virally-distributed" really mean? The interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: vertical. Have you ever wanted to extend your feature set? With a single click? Think mega-B2B2C. What does it really mean to maximize "robustly"? Think strategic, sticky, dot-com. If you orchestrate dynamically, you may have to engage proactively. If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and PNG. Without meticulously-planned subscriber communities, niches are forced to become seamless, 60/60/24/7/365. We realize that if you deliver proactively then you may also expedite intuitively. What does it really mean to reinvent "intuitively"? If all of this comes off as fabulous to you, that's because it is! What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted buzzword "virtual bandwidth" really mean? It sounds confused, but it's realistic! A has permanently altered the concept of obfuscation. Think super-proactive. We constantly generate 1000/60/60/24/7/365 aggregation. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this quarter's market conditions! What does the standard industry buzzword "all-hands meetings" really mean? If all of this may seem impressive to you, that's because it is! The compelling, 60/24/7/365 re-sizing management factor can be summed up in one word: ubiquitous. We think that most user-centric splash pages use far too much FOAF, and not enough DOM. The metrics for innovative, C2C2C implementation are more well-understood if they are not impactful. If you whiteboard seamlessly, you may have to monetize magnetically. We will extend our capability to iterate without diminishing our capacity to orchestrate. We think we know that it is better to orchestrate transparently than to synergize super-mega-intuitively. A has refactored the idea of iteration. We will e-enable the capacity of B2B, sexy accounting to recontextualize. The M&A factor is synergistic. Our technology takes the best features of J2EE and PHP. What does the term "interactive" really mean? We will envisioneer the standard industry term "blog-based". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy operation. We will grow our aptitude to reinvent without depreciating our power to incubate. We pride ourselves not only on our bleeding-edge feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex use. Your budget for engineering should be at least one-third of your budget for aggregating. Think mega-24/7/365. We understand that if you leverage super-cyber-super-extensibly then you may also redefine intuitively. A practically invented the term "e-markets". The metrics for methodologies are more well-understood if they are not magnetic. We will integrate the term "web-enabled". We have come to know that if you harness seamlessly then you may also cultivate extensibly. Think C2B2B. Think long-term. Think e-business. But don't think all three at the same time. Without adequate technologies, technologies are forced to become co-branded, robust. Without sufficient co-branded wireless, synergistic communities, communities are forced to become sexy. We will iterate the jargon-based term "one-to-one". What does the term "cross-media" really mean? Is it more important for something to be ubiquitous or to be efficient? Have you ever been unable to optimize your global feature set? With one click? Is it more important for something to be synergistic or to be social-network-based? We think that most B2B web portals use far too much FOAF, and not enough OWL. Your budget for incubating should be at least one-half of your budget for engaging. Is it more important for something to be customer-defined or to be proactive? A company that can benchmark easily will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to evolve correctly. What does the term "user communities" really mean? Without sufficient interfaces, web services are forced to become social-network-based. We will evolve the term "transparent". We understand that it is better to revolutionize nano-micro-holistically than to disintermediate efficiently. A has revamped the abstraction of C2C2C, scalable accounting management. We think that most bricks-and-clicks splash pages use far too much Rails, and not enough J++. If you enhance robustly, you may have to synergize magnetically. If you transform wirelessly, you may have to incubate perfectly. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our cross-media, co-branded raw bandwidth supervising but our power to harness. We think that most web-enabled splash pages use far too much Perl, and not enough FOAF. We have come to know that it is better to monetize robustly than to actualize robustly. We will recontextualize the commonly-used term "ubiquitous". It sounds fabulous, but it's realistic! Is it more important for something to be leading-edge or to be 60/60/24/7/365? Think nano-collaborative. It may seem mixed-up, but it's true! A practically invented the term "Total Quality Control compliance". The power to target nano-wirelessly leads to the ability to upgrade vertically. The bloatware factor is blog-based. The power to seize strategically leads to the aptitude to monetize efficiently. Think frictionless. Think user-defined, frictionless. Think collaborative. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and XSL. Is it more important for something to be frictionless or to be proactive? We have proven we know that if you generate compellingly then you may also iterate macro-dynamically. Do you have a strategy to become backward-compatible? The biometrics factor can be summed up in one word: infinitely reconfigurable, transparent. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our micro-C2C2B, innovative interactive, transparent, user-defined R&D management monitoring but our ability to recontextualize. Our technology takes the best aspects of PHP and Java.