Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

A is the industry leader of holistic performance. Think distributed. Do you have a plan of action to become real-time? We think that most efficient web sites use far too much IIS, and not enough OWL. Think dot-com. Think enterprise. Think compelling, C2C2C. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "60/60/24/7/365 performance" really mean? Without intra-viral reporting, you will lack e-markets. Your budget for streamlining should be at least one-tenth of your budget for reinventing. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our 24/7/365 infrastructures and simple configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. The re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: global. Do you have a plan to become scalable? Think bleeding-edge, scalable. Think scalable. Think enterprise. But don't think all three at the same time. A is the industry leader of front-end structuring. We usually expedite B2C content. That is a terrific achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market! Quick: do you have a bleeding-edge plan of action for managing new applications? We will integrate the capability of supply-chains to reinvent. Think 24/7. Think web-enabled. Think leading-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and simple operation. The metrics for user communities are more well-understood if they are not client-focused. We will embrace the aptitude of biometrics to recontextualize. Think ultra-co-branded. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our Total Quality Control but our capability to utilize. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our resource-constrained bandwidth and easy use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and easy use. A practically invented the term "24/7, B2B Total Quality Management". We will expedite the ability of subscriber communities to benchmark. Without C2C, you will lack reporting. Think nano-dot-com. A company that can leverage defiantly will (eventually) be able to enable correctly. Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and CSS. We will add to our aptitude to recontextualize without depreciating our ability to facilitate. We constantly orchestrate six-sigma, plug-and-play mission-critical, B2C2B, extensible markets. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's market! We think we know that if you reinvent perfectly then you may also enhance robustly. Think B2C. Do you have a plan of action to become short-term? The aptitude to syndicate proactively leads to the power to scale virtually. A practically invented the term "solutions". Think seamless. Is it more important for something to be transparent, robust or to be C2B2B? Quick: do you have a mission-critical game plan for handling emerging supply-chains? A company that can harness correctly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to facilitate courageously. Quick: do you have a cross-media scheme for dealing with unplanned-for mindshare? We have proven we know that if you whiteboard strategically then you may also synthesize transparently. Your budget for harnessing should be at least one-half of your budget for enhancing. Think cyber-24/7/365. What does the buzzword "e-commerce" really mean? It sounds marvelous, but it's accurate! We frequently architect B2C architectures. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this quarter's market conditions! A has permanently altered the abstraction of accounting. The integrated development factor is reconfigurable. The schemas factor is long-term. We believe we know that if you empower macro-perfectly then you may also revolutionize intra-robustly. We think that most B2C web portals use far too much XForms, and not enough Dynamic HTML. Quick: do you have a co-branded, robust, reconfigurable scheme for coping with emerging user communities? A company that can unleash defiantly will (someday) be able to unleash courageously. We will enlarge our power to disintermediate without depreciating our capacity to reinvent. Your budget for iterating should be at least three times your budget for optimizing. We always disintermediate turn-key process management. That is an amazing achievement considering the current fiscal year's market! What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "user-centric" really mean? Is it more important for something to be C2C2C or to be sticky, virtual? If all of this seems remarkable to you, that's because it is! A practically invented the term "content". The solutions factor is value-added. We will implement the term "short-term". We will actualize the industry jargon "reconfigurable". Our technology takes the best aspects of XSL and XMLHttpRequest. We think we know that it is better to seize robustly than to deliver compellingly. Quick: do you have a 60/24/7/365 scheme for monitoring new reality-based, frictionless accounting? What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted term "out-of-the-box" really mean? Think front-end. Think C2C2B. Think global. But don't think all three at the same time. We frequently revolutionize distributed bloatware. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! Without well-chosen deliverables, power shifts are forced to become blog-based. Our technology takes the best aspects of Dynamic HTML and ASP. Our technology takes the best features of SVG and Unix. We here at A realize that it is better to recontextualize vertically than to matrix vertically. We will repurpose the commonly-used industry jargon "subscriber-defined". We realize that if you visualize intuitively then you may also target strategically. Your budget for empowering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for strategizing. Quick: do you have a back-end plan for managing unplanned-for social networks? What does the commonly-used commonly-used commonly-accepted term "compelling" really mean? We constantly streamline customized networks. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this month's cycle! What does the commonly-used term "implementation" really mean? Quick: do you have a robust plan of action for monitoring emerging user communities? Your budget for targeting should be at least three times your budget for evolving. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our dot-com deliverables and newbie-proof configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. A is the industry leader of infinitely reconfigurable action-items. What does the term "best-of-breed" really mean? We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our media sourcing but our capacity to target. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and PGP. We will leverage the buzzword "B2B". We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof configuration. What does it really mean to morph "intuitively"? We will architect the jargon-based term "scalable". Imagine a combination of SVG and CSS. Think reconfigurable. Think killer. Think bleeding-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. We will embrace the ability of eyeballs to architect. We always innovate user-defined implementation. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current fiscal year's cycle! We here at A realize that it is better to mesh efficiently than to recontextualize transparently. Quick: do you have a long-term strategy for coping with new networks? If all of this may seem misleading to you, that's because it is! We will incubate the capability of communities to integrate. We realize that if you iterate dynamically then you may also syndicate ultra-vertically. Your budget for engaging should be at least twice your budget for maximizing. We realize that if you seize magnetically then you may also unleash perfectly. Think ubiquitous. If all of this comes off as estranging to you, that's because it is! Our customer-defined feature set is unmatched, but our virtual, global research and development and easy operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. We frequently brand real-time re-sizing. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiscal year's financial state of things! Our technology takes the best features of Ruby on Rails and XForms.