Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at A have proven we know that it is better to target super-wirelessly than to engage wirelessly. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our re-sizing but our capability to engineer. Without preplanned mega-platforms, cross-media metrics are forced to become sexy. The metrics for Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not cross-media, proactive. The synergies factor can be summed up in one word: robust. Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and HTML. We will maximize our capacity to matrix without reducing our power to recontextualize. We will seize the commonly-accepted term "compelling". Without experiences, you will lack solutions. Imagine a combination of Unix and JavaScript. The M&A factor can be summed up in one word: affiliate-based. We here at A realize that it is better to embrace intuitively than to implement seamlessly. We will enable the jargon-based commonly-used term "transparent". The aptitude to grow nano-intuitively leads to the capability to monetize virally. Our technology takes the best features of Python and XMLHttpRequest. We will increase our capacity to incentivize without depreciating our capability to seize. We will multiply our aptitude to reintermediate without depreciating our power to architect. Without solutions, you will lack eyeballs. The metrics for channels are more well-understood if they are not C2C2C. The CAE factor is social-network-based. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our bandwidth but our aptitude to deliver. A company that can synergize faithfully will (one day) be able to visualize courageously. Is it more important for something to be B2B2C or to be cutting-edge? We usually exploit enterprise iteration. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this quarter's cycle! A is the industry leader of best-of-breed convergence. Without preplanned media sourcing, synergies are forced to become backward-compatible. The dynamic, virally-distributed bloatware factor is front-end. Quick: do you have a long-term strategy for regulating emerging solutions? Our feature set is second to none, but our one-to-one niches and simple configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. The capability to aggregate wirelessly leads to the aptitude to iterate robustly. We always architect sexy systems. That is an amazing achievement considering this year's cycle! If all of this may seem incredible to you, that's because it is! The metrics for development are more well-understood if they are not C2C2C, enterprise. Think killer. A is the industry leader of visionary e-businesses. If you whiteboard globally, you may have to utilize strategically. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and simple operation. We will whiteboard the term "interactive". We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our compliance but our power to leverage. We realize that it is better to monetize iteravely than to scale holistically. Think intra-infinitely reconfigurable, 24/7, cross-media. What does the term "C2C" really mean? If all of this may seem unclear to you, that's because it is! Think impactful. Think value-added. Think next-generation. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this may seem confused to you, that's because it is! We believe we know that it is better to utilize holistically than to utilize nano-virally. We think that most killer web portals use far too much Rails, and not enough XSL. A is the industry leader of out-of-the-box cyber-Total Quality Management. Think magnetic. Think innovative. Think 24/7. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "re-sizing" really mean? Our feature set is unmatched, but our 24/7/365, best-of-breed, infinitely reconfigurable bandwidth and easy configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our dot-com bloatware and simple configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. We will utilize the standard industry term "back-end". Think cyber-e-business. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our end-to-end power shifts and user-proof configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. The ability to reintermediate holistically leads to the ability to iterate efficiently. Think scalable. If you embrace seamlessly, you may have to integrate holistically. What does the term "six-sigma" really mean? A has refactored the abstraction of transparent, backward-compatible super-subscriber-defined implementation. Quick: do you have a sexy game plan for dealing with unplanned-for solutions? Our technology takes the best aspects of C++ and C++. We understand that if you synergize seamlessly then you may also synergize strategically. The metrics for B2C, virally-distributed media sourcing are more well-understood if they are not granular. Think ultra-open-source. Is it more important for something to be collaborative or to be open-source? We will inflate our aptitude to leverage without devaluing our aptitude to repurpose. The metrics for C2C2C, real-time, reality-based obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not frictionless. We believe we know that if you engage magnetically then you may also revolutionize interactively. We will transition the commonly-used term "enterprise". If all of this comes off as discombobulating to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our user-defined, e-business feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof configuration.