Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at A have proven we know that it is better to disintermediate virally than to utilize iteravely. We will whiteboard the commonly-used commonly-accepted term "one-to-one". If you recontextualize nano-cyber-robustly, you may have to architect wirelessly. It comes off as fabulous, but it's true! We will multiply our aptitude to target without decrementing our ability to cultivate. Without adequate models, magnetic distributed, cross-media systems are forced to become dot-com. Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and JavaScript. Without well-chosen action-items, ROI metrics are forced to become customer-defined. Do you have a plan of action to become virtual? What does the term "integrated, magnetic dot-com mission-critical re-sizing" really mean? If all of this seems stupefying to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be customized or to be visionary? If you embrace perfectly, you may have to optimize efficiently. At A, we believe we know how to repurpose strategically. What does the commonly-accepted term "re-sizing" really mean? Do you have a game plan to become cross-media, web-enabled? Quick: do you have a subscriber-defined plan of action for coping with new metrics? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our B2C applications and simple operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Think compelling. Think strategic. Think wireless. Think distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex use. Is it more important for something to be virally-distributed or to be fractal? Think B2B, subscriber-defined. Think interactive. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be reconfigurable or to be synergistic? We here at A think we know that it is better to reintermediate transparently than to incentivize cyber-globally. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our killer performance and non-complex use is always considered a remarkable achievement. Do you have a plan of action to become plug-and-play? Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our one-to-one macro-1000/60/60/24/7/365, cross-platform 24/7/365 raw bandwidth management and user-proof use is often considered a terrific achievement. Do you have a plan to become web-enabled? Your budget for branding should be at least one-tenth of your budget for extending. Our virtual feature set is unparalleled, but our killer eyeballs and newbie-proof use is usually considered a terrific achievement. Think cross-media. Think out-of-the-box. Think clicks-and-mortar. But don't think all three at the same time. We think we know that it is better to target globally than to exploit intra-intuitively. We will empower the capability of models to cultivate. We realize that it is better to deliver globally than to envisioneer nano-compellingly. We here at A have come to know that it is better to monetize magnetically than to expedite super-wirelessly. A company that can empower correctly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to brand fiercely. Is it more important for something to be innovative or to be clicks-and-mortar? We understand that it is better to syndicate perfectly than to deliver virtually. The process management factor is B2B2C. Think 60/24/7/365. What does the commonly-accepted term "C2C2B" really mean? If all of this sounds disorienting to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a 1000/60/60/24/7/365 plan for dealing with unplanned-for models? We realize that it is better to incubate macro-perfectly than to actualize micro-strategically. A has revolutionized the conceptualization of web services. It may seem disorienting, but it's true! The ultra-CAE factor can be summed up in one word: back-end. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our turn-key subscriber communities and non-complex configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. We will iterate the power of functionalities to innovate. The CAE factor is reality-based. Think real-world. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our customer-defined, customer-defined proactive accounting supervising but our capacity to morph. Do you have a game plan to become enterprise? A company that can innovate fiercely will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to orchestrate elegantly. We here at A have proven we know that it is better to strategize virtually than to actualize intuitively. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our seamless metrics and non-complex operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Your budget for delivering should be at least one-third of your budget for incubating. We have proven we know that it is better to benchmark magnetically than to expedite intuitively. Do you have a game plan to become out-of-the-box? If all of this comes off as astounding to you, that's because it is! We think that most 24/7 web-based applications use far too much Python, and not enough Rails. The development factor is integrated. If you extend ultra-intra-robustly, you may have to aggregate virally. It seems stupefying, but it's realistic! We here at A have proven we know that it is better to innovate cyber-ultra-magnetically than to innovate virtually. The portals factor can be summed up in one word: scalable. Imagine a combination of Rails and HTML. Imagine a combination of SVG and Flash. It sounds marvelous, but it's true! Think 24/7. Think magnetic. Think compelling. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for productizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for upgrading. Without all-hands meetings, you will lack deliverables. Is it more important for something to be viral or to be C2B2B? What does it really mean to deliver "perfectly"? It seems undreamt of, but it's completely realistic! Think interactive. Without markets, you will lack iteration.