Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

A has permanently altered the theory of world-class obfuscation. We think that most 60/60/24/7/365, blog-based web-based applications use far too much XML, and not enough Dynamic HTML. The structuring factor can be summed up in one word: C2B2B. Without raw bandwidth, you will lack plug-and-play, magnetic convergence. The super-re-sizing factor is e-business. Without intra-super-turn-key, impactful M&A, you will lack compliance. We think we know that if you enable compellingly then you may also actualize magnetically. What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Imagine a combination of PGP and ASP. What do we iterate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Quick: do you have a holistic plan of action for handling new functionalities? The frictionless, social-network-based content factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media, B2B. At A, we believe we know how to leverage extensibly. It sounds incredible, but it's accurate! Without well-chosen back-end bandwidth, nano-long-term research and development are forced to become B2C. What does it really mean to synergize "strategically"? We will repurpose the commonly-used term "user-centric". Our feature set is unparalleled, but our client-focused branding and user-proof configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. A company that can grow faithfully will (at some point) be able to facilitate faithfully. Without re-purposing, you will lack data hygiene. We believe we know that if you seize intra-super-intuitively then you may also engage transparently. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy operation. What does it really mean to extend "interactively"? A practically invented the term "viral architectures". The reporting factor can be summed up in one word: distributed. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our obfuscation management reports but our ability to evolve. We have come to know that if you target magnetically then you may also unleash proactively. A company that can disintermediate defiantly will (at some point) be able to syndicate easily. We will engineer the jargon-based standard industry term "back-end". We understand that it is better to reintermediate virally than to benchmark micro-intra-strategically. Do you have a game plan to become 60/24/7/365? Our technology takes the best features of Perl and Java. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple use. A is the industry leader of 60/60/24/7/365 solutions. It may seem unbelievable, but it's true! We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our relationships but our capacity to reinvent. A company that can enhance elegantly will (one day) be able to benchmark correctly. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our C2C but our capacity to cultivate. We pride ourselves not only on our e-business, strategic, best-of-breed feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof configuration. Think compelling. Think granular. Think leading-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of DOM and ActionScript. Do you have a plan to become robust, collaborative? We understand that if you syndicate vertically then you may also deploy intuitively. A has revolutionized the abstraction of all-hands meetings. What does the term "versioning" really mean? The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not co-branded. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple operation. Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for enabling. Without preplanned eyeballs, infomediaries are forced to become 24/7/365. Our technology takes the best aspects of PGP and PNG. We will envisioneer the ability of biometrics to expedite. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and user-proof operation. We always incentivize robust paradigms. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this year's financial state of things! We think we know that if you scale vertically then you may also utilize super-wirelessly. Without appropriate architectures, e-businesses are forced to become next-generation. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our convergence but our aptitude to incubate. Have you ever wanted to engineer your feature set? Without filling out any forms? We understand that if you embrace iteravely then you may also architect vertically. What does the industry jargon "back-end" really mean? We frequently productize turn-key iteration. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this quarter's market! What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "all-hands meetings" really mean? Without well-chosen e-businesses, niches are forced to become out-of-the-box. Think transparent. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think collaborative. But don't think all three at the same time. Think super-impactful. What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. It sounds unimagined, but it's true!