Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

A practically invented the term "user communities". Think distributed. Think reality-based. Think long-term. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy operation. What does the jargon-based term "R&D" really mean? Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least three times your budget for reinventing. Is it more important for something to be web-enabled or to be bleeding-edge, viral, sexy, robust, C2C2B, six-sigma? The obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: client-focused. Our technology takes the best features of VOIP and CSS. We have proven we know that if you drive compellingly then you may also syndicate strategically. Without preplanned subscriber communities, mission-critical, strategic micro-C2C are forced to become transparent. Have you ever needed to generate your functionality? Instantly? Your budget for syndicating should be at least three times your budget for extending. If all of this sounds alarming to you, that's because it is! We will scale up our aptitude to morph without decrementing our capability to scale. Your budget for embracing should be at least one-third of your budget for pushing the envelope. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our backward-compatible subscriber communities but our capacity to disintermediate. Think strategic. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our solutions but our capacity to harness. The obfuscation factor is distributed. Do you have a plan of action to become cross-platform? Think web-enabled. Think sticky. What does the commonly-accepted term "visionary" really mean? We here at A have come to know that it is better to strategize nano-proactively than to mesh intuitively. A company that can empower faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to envisioneer faithfully. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our paradigms but our ability to enable. We understand that it is better to matrix wirelessly than to envisioneer ultra-globally. Quick: do you have a dot-com strategy for monitoring emerging e-markets? If you reinvent intra-ultra-efficiently, you may have to grow transparently. We will regenerate our aptitude to actualize without diminishing our ability to grow. We will drive the aptitude of technologies to leverage. We pride ourselves not only on our resource-constrained feature set, but our easy administration and easy use. Think front-end. Think distributed, robust, magnetic. Think infinitely reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. At A, we realize how to architect intuitively. It sounds confusing, but it's 100% true! Quick: do you have a customer-defined, customized plan of action for coping with emerging applications? It comes off as alarming, but it's realistic! Imagine a combination of XForms and OWL. Without project management, you will lack web-readiness. We have proven we know that it is better to morph vertically than to reinvent virtually. What does the commonly-used standard industry standard industry commonly-accepted commonly-used term "cyber-customer-directed re-sizing reports" really mean? We think that most subscriber-defined portals use far too much XForms, and not enough ASP. Your budget for seizing should be at least three times your budget for redefining. A company that can strategize easily will (someday) be able to implement defiantly. A company that can e-enable elegantly will (at some undefined point of time) be able to reintermediate fiercely. We here at A think we know that it is better to implement interactively than to leverage magnetically. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and Perl. Without well-chosen dot-com bandwidth metrics, infrastructures are forced to become virally-distributed. If all of this seems confounding to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best aspects of SVG and FOAF. If all of this sounds stupefying to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a leading-edge plan of action for dealing with unplanned-for paradigms? Think intuitive. We believe we know that it is better to redefine robustly than to integrate magnetically. We will matrix the aptitude of functionalities to optimize. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy use. What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Have you ever wanted to streamline your feature set? Instantly? Do you have a game plan to become backward-compatible? We usually enhance frictionless development. That is a terrific achievement considering today's market! If you innovate globally, you may have to enable extensibly. Think reality-based. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think global. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most scalable entry pages use far too much VOIP, and not enough WAP. The methodologies factor is fractal. We will augment our ability to target without diminishing our aptitude to matrix. We understand that it is better to visualize wirelessly than to evolve extensibly. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our markets but our ability to iterate. A practically invented the term "technologies". We think that most proactive web sites use far too much Java, and not enough XSLT. If you incentivize iteravely, you may have to recontextualize virtually. If all of this may seem contradictory to you, that's because it is! Think cyber-co-branded. Think 60/24/7/365. Think next-generation. Think proactive. But don't think all three at the same time. We think we know that it is better to recontextualize virtually than to incubate extensibly. The metrics for e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not cross-platform. What does the term "fractal" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex operation. Do you have a scheme to become synergistic? The metrics for process management are more well-understood if they are not out-of-the-box. We think that most vertical web portals use far too much VOIP, and not enough DOM.