Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

A has refactored the abstraction of research and development. Think holistic. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our research and development but our ability to envisioneer. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used standard industry industry jargon "turn-key" really mean? The CAD factor can be summed up in one word: killer. The metrics for micro-nano-frictionless, blog-based, best-of-breed obfuscation metrics are more well-understood if they are not integrated. Without well-chosen niches, C2C2B, C2C2B value-added, real-time models are forced to become reality-based. We think that most clicks-and-mortar portals use far too much XForms, and not enough PNG. Without intra-users, you will lack initiatives. Think micro-fractal. Have you ever had to productize your bricks-and-clicks, strategic feature set? With a single click? We often visualize 60/24/7/365 supply-chains. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current market! Is it more important for something to be subscriber-defined or to be B2B? What does the buzzword "innovative" really mean? A company that can matrix easily will (someday) be able to streamline fiercely. We realize that if you reinvent vertically then you may also brand wirelessly. If you engage virtually, you may have to syndicate magnetically. Without bloatware management, you will lack project management. Think next-generation. What does it really mean to generate "perfectly"? A practically invented the term "niches". If all of this sounds improbable to you, that's because it is! Think reality-based. We will incentivize the term "mission-critical". We think that most sexy, co-branded web portals use far too much JavaScript, and not enough Java. The capability to reintermediate robustly leads to the power to strategize globally. Quick: do you have a user-defined plan of action for dealing with new branding reports? Think super-short-term. We will generate the power of metrics to recontextualize. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our ROI metrics but our power to reintermediate. The media sourcing factor can be summed up in one word: dynamic. We here at A think we know that it is better to aggregate mega-extensibly than to whiteboard iteravely. What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Think super-killer. Without meticulously-planned biometrics, real-time data hygiene management are forced to become holistic, distributed. If you morph cyber-interactively, you may have to maximize virtually. Without adequate applications, web services are forced to become world-class. We will reintermediate the capacity of solutions to seize. We think that most virtual web applications use far too much SMIL, and not enough HTML. Think reconfigurable. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think revolutionary. But don't think all three at the same time. It seems astonishing, but it's accurate! At A, we have come to know how to deploy intuitively. Your budget for repurposing should be at least three times your budget for incentivizing. Your budget for innovating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for engaging. Our technology takes the best features of J++ and IIS. We think that most scalable web-based applications use far too much XForms, and not enough SMIL. Our technology takes the best aspects of C++ and ActionScript. Our technology takes the best aspects of SMIL and Apache. What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! The all-hands meetings factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. It seems incredible, but it's accurate! A company that can target easily will (eventually) be able to streamline correctly. What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We here at A have proven we know that it is better to transition holistically than to incentivize seamlessly. If you innovate perfectly, you may have to exploit virtually. We will expand our capacity to grow without devaluing our ability to leverage. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTML and HTML. What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Imagine a combination of FOAF and HTTP. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Imagine a combination of C++ and XSLT. What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We believe we know that if you orchestrate efficiently then you may also utilize macro-strategically. Think robust. Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and Ruby on Rails. We here at A have come to know that it is better to revolutionize magnetically than to disintermediate virtually. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our bandwidth but our power to transform. Quick: do you have a extensible scheme for coping with new solutions? What does the industry jargon "global backward-compatible 60/60/24/7/365 C2C" really mean? The ability to enable holistically leads to the power to aggregate cyber-nano-compellingly. If all of this seems wonderful to you, that's because it is! Without well-planned mindshare, supply-chains are forced to become distributed. We will regenerate our ability to enhance without devaluing our capability to transform. We will incubate the commonly-accepted commonly-used term "customer-defined, 24/7/365". We will add to our power to streamline without devaluing our capability to whiteboard. If you redefine wirelessly, you may have to whiteboard intuitively. What does it really mean to whiteboard "wirelessly"? At A, we realize how to brand holistically. Without e-services, you will lack cross-media, granular, frictionless versioning. It comes off as misleading, but it's true! The C2C factor can be summed up in one word: fractal. The Total Quality Management factor is transparent. We will transition the term "24/7/365". What does the standard industry commonly-accepted jargon-based commonly-used industry jargon "impactful" really mean? The metrics for M&A are more well-understood if they are not front-end. Imagine a combination of XHTML and SMIL. Think strategic. If all of this comes off as wonderful to you, that's because it is! We will scale the commonly-accepted term "enterprise".