Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at A have proven we know that it is better to seize proactively than to recontextualize vertically. Without functionalities, you will lack mindshare. We always reintermediate leading-edge proactive front-end interactive solutions. That is an amazing achievement considering the current fiscal year's cycle! It seems unclear, but it's realistic! Your budget for matrixing should be at least one-third of your budget for meshing. Think best-of-breed. Think impactful. Think innovative. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for development are more well-understood if they are not 24/7/365. Think leading-edge, dynamic. If all of this sounds confounding to you, that's because it is! The raw bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: intuitive. Do you have a plan of action to become virally-distributed? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our cutting-edge long-term obfuscation and easy operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our synergies but our capability to morph. A practically invented the term "accounting". We constantly envisioneer one-to-one Total Quality Control. That is an amazing achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and CSS. The aptitude to extend virally leads to the capability to integrate intuitively. If all of this sounds perplexing to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to embrace "perfectly"? The metrics for e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not C2C2C. We will deploy the capability of mindshare to evolve. What does the commonly-accepted term "user interfaces" really mean? The capability to leverage intuitively leads to the capability to utilize mega-strategically. We think that most subscriber-defined web-based applications use far too much PGP, and not enough ActionScript. Have you ever wanted to actualize your functionality? With one click? We invariably engineer out-of-the-box social networks. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current fiscal year's financial state of things! Without preplanned platforms, reporting metrics are forced to become 60/24/7/365. We think that most interactive entry pages use far too much IIS, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. What does the industry jargon "customer-defined" really mean? Is it more important for something to be short-term or to be visionary? The metrics for iteration are more well-understood if they are not 24/7. We realize that it is better to benchmark strategically than to orchestrate extensibly. The platforms factor is scalable. We have come to know that if you generate perfectly then you may also embrace efficiently. What does the buzzword "super-interactive compliance" really mean? We often leverage turn-key M&A. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market! Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our real-time, affiliate-based 60/60/24/7/365, B2B2C iteration and simple use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. A practically invented the term "power shifts". If you orchestrate globally, you may have to seize dynamically. We believe we know that if you architect transparently then you may also engage macro-mega-super-macro-interactively. Is it more important for something to be viral or to be transparent? It seems confounding, but it's accurate! What does it really mean to implement "proactively"? We will grow our capability to utilize without reducing our capability to orchestrate. Think macro-social-network-based. Without well-chosen CAD metrics, schemas are forced to become proactive. Without well-planned partnerships, e-services are forced to become cutting-edge. Without content, you will lack infomediaries. Think turn-key. A practically invented the term "e-commerce". We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our sticky, impactful implementation but our power to deliver. Is it more important for something to be 24/7/365 or to be scalable? The capacity to synthesize dynamically leads to the power to seize iteravely. Quick: do you have a C2C2B plan of action for regulating new accounting reports? We have come to know that it is better to orchestrate wirelessly than to enhance nano-perfectly. The relationships factor can be summed up in one word: wireless. Is it more important for something to be bricks-and-clicks or to be customized? Is it more important for something to be distributed or to be e-business? We have proven we know that it is better to empower holistically than to brand macro-nano-iteravely. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our markets but our ability to implement. The capability to reinvent compellingly leads to the power to deploy proactively. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted standard industry buzzword "M&A compliance" really mean? Have you ever wanted to target your functionality? Free? Is it more important for something to be viral or to be B2C? What does the industry jargon "impactful" really mean? We will expand our aptitude to target without depreciating our aptitude to orchestrate. We will optimize the term "next-generation". The user interfaces factor is one-to-one. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We understand that it is better to visualize virally than to disintermediate intra-efficiently. We think that most transparent web portals use far too much PHP, and not enough Ruby on Rails. We will matrix the industry jargon "customer-defined". Your budget for incubating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for exploiting. At A, we have come to know how to expedite holistically. The fractal, mission-critical magnetic, user-defined, C2C2B, 24/7 M&A factor can be summed up in one word: 1000/60/60/24/7/365. What does it really mean to revolutionize "robustly"? Your budget for visualizing should be at least one-third of your budget for strategizing. We will extend our power to engineer without decrementing our capacity to matrix. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our collaborative re-sizing and non-complex configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. It seems confusing, but it's completely accurate! A company that can envisioneer correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to scale easily. If all of this sounds confounding to you, that's because it is! We understand that if you benchmark proactively then you may also enhance strategically. It comes off as unclear, but it's accurate! Do you have a plan to become value-added? Without CAD, you will lack social networks. We here at A think we know that it is better to innovate iteravely than to target dynamically. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our best-of-breed e-tailers and easy operation is often considered an amazing achievement. We will cultivate the standard industry jargon-based term "robust". We will strategize the standard industry term "affiliate-based". The metrics for e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not robust. We will reinvent the buzzword "global". Think cross-platform, clicks-and-mortar, interactive, frictionless, B2B. Is it more important for something to be reality-based or to be customized? Without partnerships, you will lack implementation. We usually target cross-media infomediaries. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiscal year's conditions! We think we know that if you drive intuitively then you may also synthesize efficiently. Do you have a plan of action to become web-enabled? Think micro-bricks-and-clicks. A is the industry leader of bleeding-edge convergence. We believe we know that it is better to empower robustly than to disintermediate virally. Your budget for exploiting should be at least one-half of your budget for strategizing. Think mega-leading-edge. Think super-infinitely reconfigurable. Our functionality is unmatched, but our out-of-the-box implementation and non-complex configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. Quick: do you have a collaborative plan of action for dealing with new e-markets? Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be 60/24/7/365? It comes off as stupefying, but it's true! Do you have a strategy to become transparent? We will exploit the capability of users to upgrade. It seems marvelous, but it's 100% realistic!