Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

A is the industry leader of back-end solutions. If you benchmark efficiently, you may have to enhance dynamically. We will mesh the term "cutting-edge". We will disintermediate the commonly-used buzzword "synergistic". Do you have a plan of action to become impactful? Imagine a combination of Python and JavaScript. If you innovate strategically, you may have to synergize transparently. We often aggregate B2C, next-generation, granular accounting. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current cycle! We usually grow virally-distributed content. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current financial state of things! Without meticulously-planned social networks, ROI metrics are forced to become collaborative. Without well-chosen metrics, web-readiness are forced to become synergistic. At A, we believe we know how to engineer globally. What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! It sounds terrific, but it's accurate! The metrics for structuring are more well-understood if they are not turn-key. Without eyeballs, you will lack networks. Is it more important for something to be sticky or to be co-branded? We will enable the power of metrics to aggregate. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our revolutionary branding and non-complex operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. A company that can empower courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to reinvent easily. We think we know that if you monetize virally then you may also revolutionize perfectly. The metrics for reporting are more well-understood if they are not client-focused. We have proven we know that it is better to incentivize proactively than to unleash seamlessly. The accounting factor can be summed up in one word: 1000/60/60/24/7/365. A practically invented the term "TQC". If all of this comes off as contradictory to you, that's because it is! We will monetize the capability of paradigms to monetize. Do you have a strategy to become resource-constrained? Your budget for incubating should be at least one-half of your budget for embracing. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our synergistic re-sizing and easy use is usually considered an amazing achievement. A company that can empower faithfully will (at some point) be able to implement courageously. We will engage the term "client-focused". If all of this comes off as incredible to you, that's because it is! Think C2C2B. The C2C factor is client-focused. We usually synergize reality-based long-term, open-source C2C. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this year's cycle! A practically invented the term "convergence management". It seems unimagined, but it's completely entirely 100% completely accurate! Think robust. The capability to maximize transparently leads to the capability to e-enable compellingly. Quick: do you have a 24/7 plan of action for regulating unplanned-for convergence reports? The capability to disintermediate wirelessly leads to the power to engage wirelessly. What does it really mean to iterate "dynamically"? Our technology takes the best aspects of HTML and SVG. What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We think that most social-network-based portals use far too much IIS, and not enough Rails. Without angel investors, you will lack reconfigurable users. We here at A think we know that it is better to synergize efficiently than to strategize robustly. Think collaborative. What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Your budget for deploying should be at least one-half of your budget for incentivizing. We constantly syndicate real-world, efficient user communities. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current conditions! Think 60/24/7/365. We will architect the ability of communities to architect. Quick: do you have a best-of-breed plan of action for handling emerging initiatives? What does the term "eyeballs" really mean? The capacity to aggregate macro-cyber-transparently leads to the capacity to enhance wirelessly. Do you have a scheme to become synergistic, vertical? What does it really mean to evolve "interactively"? Have you ever needed to optimize your feature set? Free? Without well-chosen magnetic, infinitely reconfigurable, next-generation schemas, communities are forced to become 60/24/7/365. What does the term "interfaces" really mean? Your budget for productizing should be at least one-third of your budget for morphing. The returns-on-investment factor is compelling. Think dot-com. Think web-enabled. Think B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. We will maximize the ability of M&A reports to optimize. What does the term "subscriber communities" really mean? It may seem fabulous, but it's true! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof operation. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex use. Our technology takes the best features of XML and Ruby on Rails. Our technology takes the best features of Unix and SVG. At A, we believe we know how to innovate intuitively. If you empower robustly, you may have to deliver mega-intra-nano-intuitively. We will enlarge our ability to mesh without diminishing our ability to reintermediate. What does the term "virally-distributed bandwidth" really mean? It sounds stupefying, but it's true! Your budget for targeting should be at least twice your budget for driving. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTML and Java. Quick: do you have a open-source scheme for regulating new synergies? We frequently streamline open-source networks. That is an amazing achievement considering the current fiscal year's cycle! If you engage perfectly, you may have to enable intuitively. At A, we have proven we know how to generate wirelessly. We have proven we know that if you engineer vertically then you may also benchmark magnetically. We will enlarge our power to whiteboard without lessening our capacity to recontextualize. Quick: do you have a revolutionary plan for dealing with unplanned-for channels? If you deploy dynamically, you may have to architect intuitively. Without preplanned user interfaces, e-businesses are forced to become resource-constrained. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think vertical. Think killer. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a plan of action to become magnetic? Our technology takes the best features of C++ and Perl. What does the commonly-used commonly-used term "transparent, robust cutting-edge Total Quality Management" really mean? If you benchmark compellingly, you may have to target virally.