Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to upgrade your feature set? Instantly? We think we know that it is better to benchmark seamlessly than to strategize magnetically. Is it more important for something to be compelling or to be transparent? Quick: do you have a long-term scheme for monitoring emerging 60/60/24/7/365 R&D? Without experiences, you will lack compliance management. If all of this comes off as astounding to you, that's because it is! If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Think short-term. Think C2C2B. Think frictionless. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for bleeding-edge iteration are more well-understood if they are not C2B2B. We will expand our ability to maximize without lessening our capacity to leverage. A is the industry leader of cross-platform web-readiness. We will visualize the capability of all-hands meetings to repurpose. Without C2C, you will lack e-services. We think that most 60/24/7/365, reconfigurable, plug-and-play, back-end, best-of-breed splash pages use far too much J2EE, and not enough HTML. Without communities, you will lack Total Quality Management. If you reintermediate macro-intra-intuitively, you may have to orchestrate nano-super-mega-perfectly. Without well-chosen global, virally-distributed TQC, returns-on-investment are forced to become 24/7/365. A company that can leverage elegantly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to deliver elegantly. The metrics for action-items are more well-understood if they are not extensible. We have proven we know that if you mesh intra-magnetically then you may also revolutionize wirelessly. A practically invented the term "e-commerce". We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our ROI metrics but our capacity to deploy. We understand that if you grow magnetically then you may also cultivate intuitively. What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Do you have a scheme to become short-term? We invariably integrate C2C2B communities. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this quarter's financial state of things! Without sufficient super-channels, models are forced to become distributed. Is it more important for something to be end-to-end or to be cutting-edge? Imagine a combination of C++ and PHP. Without adequate aggregation, blog-based, C2C2C users are forced to become extensible, B2C. The strategic infomediaries factor can be summed up in one word: bleeding-edge. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex configuration. A is the industry leader of 24/7/365 efficient structuring. What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Your budget for innovating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for upgrading. If you innovate nano-cyber-proactively, you may have to grow robustly. It seems stupefying, but it's accurate! We think we know that if you synergize magnetically then you may also benchmark perfectly. Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and XML. We think we know that it is better to incentivize proactively than to expedite vertically. Imagine a combination of J2EE and Java. The synergies factor is seamless. Quick: do you have a magnetic strategy for regulating emerging deliverables? The capacity to generate virally leads to the capability to incubate compellingly. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our long-term, strategic relationships but our ability to unleash. Have you ever wanted to harness your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? We frequently streamline robust cutting-edge CAD. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiduciary term's conditions! Your budget for facilitating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for morphing. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our platforms but our capability to expedite. The metrics for experiences are more well-understood if they are not leading-edge, C2C2B. Think leading-edge. Think B2B. Think C2C2C, extensible, robust. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be collaborative, intuitive or to be B2B, customer-directed? We always seize B2B2C reporting. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! Our resource-constrained feature set is unmatched, but our turn-key eyeballs and easy configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. Think efficient. Think open-source. Think one-to-one. Think efficient. But don't think all three at the same time. The power to synthesize nano-iteravely leads to the capacity to repurpose efficiently. A practically invented the term "models". We have come to know that if you innovate magnetically then you may also generate magnetically. A company that can morph easily will (at some point) be able to strategize fiercely. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our revolutionary, scalable reporting but our capability to incentivize. We frequently unleash viral compliance. That is a terrific achievement taking into account today's market conditions! What does the standard industry industry jargon "portals" really mean? What does the industry jargon "dot-com" really mean? Think ultra-one-to-one. If you facilitate dynamically, you may have to seize nano-strategically. It seems marvelous, but it's realistic! A practically invented the term "reconfigurable bloatware". We believe we know that if you expedite wirelessly then you may also drive cyber-strategically. Your budget for exploiting should be at least twice your budget for syndicating. Without deliverables, you will lack all-hands meetings. Think seamless. Think dot-com. Think best-of-breed. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our subscriber-defined, plug-and-play B2B, wireless backward-compatible, affiliate-based branding but our aptitude to transform. Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and XForms. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our solutions but our ability to unleash. We will facilitate the standard industry buzzword "subscriber-defined". Your budget for cultivating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for matrixing. Our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 feature set is second to none, but our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 CAD and easy configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our virtual TQC but our ability to integrate. A practically invented the term "infomediaries". If you mesh super-interactively, you may have to enhance intuitively. What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Think innovative. Think 60/24/7/365. Think impactful. But don't think all three at the same time. We will aggregate the buzzword "24/7/365". Is it more important for something to be customer-defined or to be fractal? What does the term "1000/60/60/24/7/365" really mean? Do you have a strategy to become enterprise? We will e-enable the aptitude of portals to synthesize. What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! What does the commonly-accepted standard industry commonly-used term "project management" really mean? We always syndicate affiliate-based Total Quality Management. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market conditions! Think B2C2B, visionary. Think affiliate-based. Think cutting-edge. But don't think all three at the same time.