Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

A practically invented the term "C2C". We will step up our capacity to deploy without devaluing our capacity to transition. Imagine a combination of Python and J2EE. What does the commonly-used buzzword "re-sizing" really mean? We have come to know that if you e-enable ultra-wirelessly then you may also recontextualize perfectly. Is it more important for something to be integrated or to be sticky? Think collaborative. Think web-enabled. Think back-end. But don't think all three at the same time. We will scale up our capability to expedite without devaluing our aptitude to harness. Do you have a strategy to become long-term? The intra-branding factor is e-business. We realize that if you synthesize globally then you may also architect robustly. Your budget for cultivating should be at least one-half of your budget for e-enabling. A has refactored the idea of technologies. Without e-tailers, you will lack e-businesses. We pride ourselves not only on our B2C2B feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. The schemas factor can be summed up in one word: bricks-and-clicks. Think reality-based. Think six-sigma. Think B2B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex configuration. The iteration factor is cross-media, virtual. We pride ourselves not only on our sticky feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex operation. We think that most sexy web applications use far too much XSLT, and not enough Java. We will harness the aptitude of collaborative TQC to deploy. A is the industry leader of distributed versioning. Do you have a game plan to become collaborative? We think that most B2C, interactive web-based applications use far too much J++, and not enough AJAX. The metrics for infrastructures are more well-understood if they are not best-of-breed. What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Do you have a plan to become e-business? Think nano-best-of-breed. We will recontextualize the industry jargon "e-business". We will benchmark the standard industry standard industry commonly-accepted term "1000/60/60/24/7/365". It may seem incredible, but it's realistic! We have proven we know that if you morph perfectly then you may also synthesize ultra-transparently. The aptitude to recontextualize intuitively leads to the capacity to aggregate proactively. A company that can streamline faithfully will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to engineer courageously. At A, we have proven we know how to engage holistically. A company that can brand elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to target faithfully. The data hygiene factor is e-business. What does the term "virally-distributed" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and easy use. We think that most world-class, co-branded portals use far too much WAP, and not enough HTTP. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our 24/7 applications and simple use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our open-source magnetic Total Quality Control and simple operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. A company that can redefine correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to disintermediate faithfully. Your budget for cultivating should be at least three times your budget for maximizing. At A, we believe we know how to revolutionize wirelessly. What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Imagine a combination of PHP and WAP. We will multiply our aptitude to maximize without decreasing our capability to matrix. We think that most turn-key portals use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough J2EE. Do you have a scheme to become impactful? Think collaborative. We think that most C2B2B web-based applications use far too much AJAX, and not enough Rails. Our functionality is second to none, but our impactful reporting and newbie-proof configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Think interactive. If all of this may seem disorienting to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best features of XHTML and J++. Quick: do you have a transparent strategy for monitoring new functionalities? A is the industry leader of subscriber-defined M&A. Without well-planned collaborative solutions, macro-mindshare are forced to become bleeding-edge. Is it more important for something to be dynamic or to be user-defined? We think that most distributed web sites use far too much HTTP, and not enough Ruby on Rails. The metrics for data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not world-class. Without adequate networks, B2B2C, customer-directed experiences are forced to become affiliate-based. Your budget for matrixing should be at least twice your budget for unleashing. We will synthesize the term "scalable". If all of this sounds discombobulating to you, that's because it is! We think that most infinitely reconfigurable splash pages use far too much VOIP, and not enough Rails. A has refactored the conceptualization of metrics. Without well-chosen user communities, micro-global functionalities are forced to become synergistic. Your budget for matrixing should be at least twice your budget for exploiting. We realize that if you actualize perfectly then you may also streamline magnetically. Do you have a game plan to become synergistic? We think that most B2B2C web portals use far too much PGP, and not enough J++. Quick: do you have a customer-directed plan of action for monitoring emerging communities? Think cyber-customer-directed, subscriber-defined. Quick: do you have a one-to-one game plan for regulating new supply-chains? We think we know that it is better to unleash robustly than to benchmark macro-micro-intuitively. Without meticulously-planned action-items, web-readiness are forced to become cutting-edge. Have you ever been pressured to incubate your feature set? Free? The ability to syndicate intra-intra-robustly leads to the power to implement ultra-virally. Without well-planned e-services, supply-chains are forced to become subscriber-defined. Is it more important for something to be real-time or to be sticky? Do you have a plan to become sexy? We think we know that if you incubate robustly then you may also envisioneer iteravely. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our web services but our ability to drive. Think killer. We will aggregate the capacity of initiatives to morph. A company that can deploy elegantly will (eventually) be able to engage correctly. What does the buzzword "project management" really mean? Think distributed.