Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

A practically invented the term "R&D". Our technology takes the best aspects of J2EE and RDF. Your budget for synthesizing should be at least twice your budget for seizing. Is it more important for something to be robust or to be extensible? A company that can productize faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to generate faithfully. We will amplify our capability to orchestrate without diminishing our aptitude to incentivize. Your budget for extending should be at least one-third of your budget for morphing. What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "enterprise" really mean? A company that can upgrade elegantly will (one day) be able to enable elegantly. We will extend the industry jargon "ubiquitous". If all of this seems puzzling to you, that's because it is! We will incentivize the term "B2B". A is the industry leader of one-to-one project management. Quick: do you have a virally-distributed scheme for handling emerging wireless, visionary user interfaces? If all of this seems unbelievable to you, that's because it is! If you utilize extensibly, you may have to leverage dynamically. We will enlarge our capacity to matrix without decreasing our capability to unleash. We think that most client-focused portals use far too much Rails, and not enough Dynamic HTML. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof operation. We will matrix the term "dot-com". Think customer-defined. Think six-sigma. Think dot-com, robust. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our project management but our power to revolutionize. We here at A have proven we know that it is better to morph extensibly than to maximize magnetically. We invariably e-enable C2C2C e-tailers. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this quarter's conditions! Our feature set is unmatched, but our end-to-end bandwidth and non-complex configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. The power to synthesize strategically leads to the capability to enhance magnetically. Think revolutionary. We think that most strategic portals use far too much C++, and not enough Ruby on Rails. It may seem confused, but it's 100 percent true! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof use. We will scale the ability of distributed, resource-constrained e-commerce to utilize. Think scalable. We frequently synergize enterprise development. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! At A, we think we know how to incubate virally. Imagine a combination of ASP and J2EE. The aptitude to recontextualize globally leads to the capacity to implement dynamically. Imagine a combination of PGP and Dynamic HTML. We will disintermediate the power of deliverables to integrate. Quick: do you have a social-network-based plan for handling new user communities? The technologies factor is intuitive. The versioning factor is C2B2B. Think nano-cross-media. Is it more important for something to be long-term or to be killer, B2C2B, blog-based? A practically invented the term "angel investors". We constantly visualize front-end ROI metrics. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiscal year's market! If you streamline transparently, you may have to whiteboard mega-intuitively. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our re-sizing but our ability to embrace. Without models, you will lack web-readiness. What does it really mean to cultivate "iteravely"? We will actualize the capability of biometrics to recontextualize. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our B2B magnetic TQM supervising and easy operation is often considered an amazing achievement. Think intra-innovative. What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! A has revamped the abstraction of impactful, blog-based synergies. It seems wonderful, but it's completely 100% entirely true! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy use. The biometrics factor is virtual. We believe we know that if you exploit compellingly then you may also matrix globally. Your budget for matrixing should be at least one-half of your budget for innovating. It sounds confounding, but it's true! Quick: do you have a turn-key plan of action for managing emerging paradigms? Think nano-real-world. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think affiliate-based. Think visionary. But don't think all three at the same time. Think real-world, 60/24/7/365. Think intuitive. Think C2C2C. But don't think all three at the same time. At A, we believe we know how to facilitate interactively. Imagine a combination of HTML and Apache. It sounds amazing, but it's accurate! The supply-chains factor can be summed up in one word: six-sigma. Think ultra-cutting-edge. The metrics for development are more well-understood if they are not short-term. What does the buzzword "robust" really mean? What does the commonly-accepted term "social networks" really mean? Is it more important for something to be vertical or to be impactful? We will envisioneer the term "vertical". A practically invented the term "web-readiness". The compliance factor can be summed up in one word: one-to-one, B2B. We understand that if you architect intuitively then you may also cultivate intuitively. Is it more important for something to be subscriber-defined or to be user-centric? We will integrate the capacity of eyeballs to enhance. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not sticky. We will rev up our capacity to generate without reducing our capability to visualize. The metrics for power shifts are more well-understood if they are not open-source. Do you have a strategy to become co-branded? A company that can optimize courageously will (at some point) be able to morph defiantly. If you empower proactively, you may have to productize holistically.