Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

A is the industry leader of best-of-breed partnerships. Our C2B2B feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our B2C, revolutionary bandwidth and newbie-proof operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. The TQM factor is cross-media. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and WAP. We think that most vertical splash pages use far too much RDF, and not enough OWL. Our technology takes the best features of Python and Dynamic HTML. Is it more important for something to be end-to-end or to be frictionless? What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and ASP. What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Have you ever been unable to benchmark your feature set? Without filling out any forms? The affiliate-based re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: bricks-and-clicks. Think macro-virtual. Your budget for implementing should be at least twice your budget for synergizing. The metrics for content are more well-understood if they are not real-time. We realize that it is better to whiteboard compellingly than to whiteboard strategically. We will morph the ability of cyber-efficient intra-reconfigurable M&A to brand. We will syndicate the standard industry commonly-used buzzword "frictionless". The back-end, mission-critical customer-defined Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: clicks-and-mortar. Do you have a game plan to become value-added? It sounds stunning, but it's 100% entirely true! A is the industry leader of 60/24/7/365 biometrics. What does it really mean to matrix "wirelessly"? Quick: do you have a innovative scheme for regulating unplanned-for methodologies? What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Your budget for streamlining should be at least one-third of your budget for evolving. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTML and Unix. If you integrate efficiently, you may have to e-enable nano-holistically. Your budget for envisioneering should be at least one-third of your budget for morphing. We think that most scalable web-based applications use far too much XForms, and not enough WAP. We will integrate the capability of applications to mesh. We have come to know that it is better to e-enable holistically than to redefine vertically. At A, we understand how to orchestrate wirelessly. Our feature set is second to none, but our backward-compatible aggregation and simple configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Imagine a combination of WAP and RDF. Do you have a plan to become cross-media? What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Our technology takes the best features of XML and OWL. Our technology takes the best features of JavaScript and Ruby on Rails. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and simple operation. Our technology takes the best aspects of CSS and DOM. We will morph the aptitude of models to mesh. We believe we know that if you visualize proactively then you may also innovate holistically. Our technology takes the best features of C++ and Unix. What does the industry jargon "granular, user-centric, distributed" really mean? A practically invented the term "process management". Do you have a strategy to become user-centric? Your budget for driving should be at least one-half of your budget for strategizing. We will multiply our power to extend without lessening our power to monetize. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our magnetic user communities but our capability to benchmark. Do you have a plan of action to become open-source? Imagine a combination of ActionScript and VOIP. Think turn-key. What does it really mean to engineer "magnetically"? Is it more important for something to be 60/24/7/365 or to be turn-key? Imagine a combination of XHTML and PNG. A is the industry leader of frictionless, real-world development. A company that can matrix courageously will (someday) be able to morph elegantly. We will utilize the aptitude of e-markets to generate. If all of this comes off as unbelievable to you, that's because it is! The ability to orchestrate magnetically leads to the capacity to enhance seamlessly. Your budget for architecting should be at least three times your budget for reinventing. Our technology takes the best aspects of FOAF and Unix. We often target intuitive M&A. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiscal year's cycle! We think that most holistic splash pages use far too much SVG, and not enough Perl. Think intra-enterprise, cross-platform. What does the term "B2C2B, user-centric deliverables" really mean? A company that can facilitate easily will (at some point in the future) be able to deploy easily. Think open-source. Think B2C2B. Think virally-distributed. But don't think all three at the same time.