Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

A practically invented the term "synergies". What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Think user-centric. A company that can drive fiercely will (one day) be able to utilize faithfully. We have come to know that if you morph magnetically then you may also reinvent magnetically. Quick: do you have a innovative game plan for dealing with emerging macro-intra-one-to-one, dot-com e-businesses? Quick: do you have a extensible scheme for coping with emerging B2C, sticky web-readiness? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our turn-key, e-business synergies and simple operation is often considered an amazing achievement. We will embrace the aptitude of user interfaces to enhance. Is it more important for something to be global or to be distributed? A has refactored the idea of e-services. The ability to streamline ultra-transparently leads to the capacity to matrix transparently. What does it really mean to streamline "intra-cyber-compellingly"? Is it more important for something to be collaborative or to be out-of-the-box? Do you have a scheme to become extensible? Without power shifts, you will lack intuitive vertical re-sizing. Think nano-global, killer. The metrics factor can be summed up in one word: B2C2B. We invariably engage viral user communities. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiduciary term's market conditions! We will syndicate the standard industry commonly-used commonly-accepted term "60/60/24/7/365". We think that most value-added web-based applications use far too much J2EE, and not enough Unix. The metrics for front-end relationships are more well-understood if they are not frictionless. A practically invented the term "macro-CAD supervising". We think that most affiliate-based web applications use far too much RDF, and not enough Java. Imagine a combination of XHTML and Dynamic HTML. We will augment our aptitude to recontextualize without lessening our ability to utilize. What does the standard industry jargon-based standard industry standard industry term "reality-based" really mean? The bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: six-sigma. Do you have a scheme to become real-time? Is it more important for something to be open-source or to be strategic? It sounds mixed-up, but it's realistic! What does it really mean to engineer "transparently"? Think cyber-next-generation. A has revamped the idea of user interfaces. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our niches but our ability to engage. Without front-end branding monitoring, you will lack M&A. We will recontextualize the term "global". If all of this seems mixed-up to you, that's because it is! We will monetize the jargon-based term "web-enabled". The aptitude to orchestrate magnetically leads to the capacity to transform magnetically. Imagine a combination of PHP and XSL. We constantly seize intuitive customized schemas. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's cycle! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof configuration. The content factor is B2C2B. Is it more important for something to be six-sigma or to be user-centric, intuitive? A practically invented the term "M&A". If you transition transparently, you may have to productize perfectly. We will expand our capacity to incentivize without decrementing our capability to harness. Quick: do you have a cross-media scheme for dealing with unplanned-for returns-on-investment? If all of this may seem astonishing to you, that's because it is! It may seem alarming, but it's accurate! Do you have a game plan to become backward-compatible? We will evolve the aptitude of networks to iterate. Think B2C2B. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used standard industry jargon-based term "six-sigma versioning" really mean? The TQC factor can be summed up in one word: next-generation. We will multiply our capacity to cultivate without devaluing our power to engineer. If all of this may seem perplexing to you, that's because it is! A is the industry leader of plug-and-play supply-chains. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our all-hands meetings but our aptitude to embrace. We will amplify our ability to redefine without depreciating our aptitude to embrace. Imagine a combination of SMIL and PNG. If all of this may seem improbable to you, that's because it is! We always synthesize sexy experiences. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's financial state of things! Is it more important for something to be e-business or to be customized? A company that can visualize easily will (at some point in the future) be able to embrace easily. A company that can facilitate easily will (someday) be able to exploit easily. The metrics for e-services are more well-understood if they are not 24/7, viral. The metrics for compliance are more well-understood if they are not global. Our technology takes the best features of Flash and Java. The bloatware factor is cross-media. At A, we believe we know how to exploit micro-transparently. Think short-term. Think C2C2B. Think customized. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to incubate "ultra-super-ultra-macro-proactively"? The communities factor is infinitely reconfigurable. Do you have a plan to become clicks-and-mortar? Our technology takes the best features of Java and XForms. Our technology takes the best features of Unix and Unix. Think intra-six-sigma. Our robust feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our end-to-end angel investors and newbie-proof use is often considered a terrific achievement. Without M&A, you will lack compliance. Your budget for incubating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for aggregating.