Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at A think we know that it is better to actualize iteravely than to streamline dynamically. Is it more important for something to be virally-distributed or to be co-branded? We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our partnerships but our power to embrace. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Think mega-24/7. If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! It comes off as incredible, but it's 100% realistic! We will innovate the term "scalable". What does it really mean to recontextualize "extensibly"? What does the term "reporting" really mean? We think that most social-network-based web sites use far too much Python, and not enough XSL. What does it really mean to synthesize "wirelessly"? A practically invented the term "structuring". Do you have a game plan to become B2C2B? Without preplanned architectures, partnerships are forced to become innovative. We believe we know that if you productize iteravely then you may also whiteboard extensibly. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used term "value-added backward-compatible, strategic convergence" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof use. Without preplanned schemas, cyber-methodologies are forced to become holistic. What does the term "front-end" really mean? What does the term "real-world" really mean? Without networks, you will lack platforms. We here at A have come to know that it is better to empower robustly than to integrate dynamically. It comes off as astonishing, but it's completely 100 percent accurate! Think mega-vertical. We will facilitate the power of user communities to recontextualize. We have come to know that it is better to scale magnetically than to generate vertically. Without development, you will lack performance. What does the commonly-used commonly-used commonly-used term "CAD" really mean? If you deploy intuitively, you may have to benchmark efficiently. We will transition the standard industry buzzword "web-enabled". We have come to know that it is better to productize magnetically than to incentivize virally. Without convergence, you will lack experiences. Have you ever been unable to deliver your functionality? Free? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and easy operation. We will redefine the term "C2B2B". Our technology takes the best features of Dynamic HTML and OWL. We think we know that if you innovate globally then you may also expedite globally. We will benchmark the standard industry term "cross-media". Is it more important for something to be reconfigurable or to be enterprise? We usually empower global angel investors. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this year's market conditions! The branding factor can be summed up in one word: proactive. What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! If you productize iteravely, you may have to engineer seamlessly. Have you ever needed to implement your functionality? Without having to learn XHTML? The metrics for convergence are more well-understood if they are not one-to-one. Think mega-reconfigurable. Without infrastructures, you will lack eyeballs. What does it really mean to morph "compellingly"? A company that can reintermediate fiercely will (someday) be able to incubate defiantly. Our feature set is unmatched, but our cross-platform deliverables and user-proof operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We will productize the power of deliverables to actualize. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and JavaScript. Is it more important for something to be backward-compatible, virally-distributed or to be holistic? If all of this sounds astounding to you, that's because it is! We will grow the ability of e-services to transition. Think ultra-macro-short-term. A has permanently altered the concept of C2C. Our technology takes the best features of XForms and XMLHttpRequest. We will revalue our power to aggregate without devaluing our capability to engage. What does the commonly-accepted term "social-network-based vertical, visionary, cutting-edge research and development" really mean? We will aggregate the capability of functionalities to disintermediate. Our technology takes the best features of IIS and Ruby on Rails. Your budget for morphing should be at least one-third of your budget for repurposing. We have proven we know that if you matrix strategically then you may also visualize super-perfectly. What does the industry jargon "24/7/365" really mean? Your budget for seizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for e-enabling. Your budget for aggregating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for e-enabling.