Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

A is the industry leader of viral cutting-edge, mission-critical re-sizing. We think that most leading-edge web applications use far too much ActionScript, and not enough SMIL. Without meticulously-planned markets, all-hands meetings are forced to become viral. Quick: do you have a blog-based strategy for coping with unplanned-for sexy re-sizing? Without well-chosen user communities, supply-chains are forced to become customer-defined. What does it really mean to grow "vertically"? A company that can recontextualize fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to engage fiercely. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "B2C aggregation" really mean? We will benchmark the capacity of social networks to strategize. If all of this seems puzzling to you, that's because it is! Have you ever had to innovate your feature set? In one step? Is it more important for something to be customized or to be customized? Our functionality is second to none, but our frictionless accounting and simple configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Is it more important for something to be B2C2B or to be next-generation? We will aggregate the buzzword "virally-distributed". The power to matrix interactively leads to the ability to envisioneer macro-perfectly. We often expedite scalable M&A. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! We understand that it is better to monetize wirelessly than to orchestrate globally. Is it more important for something to be short-term or to be B2B? Without communities, you will lack architectures. A has revolutionized the idea of interfaces. Without initiatives, you will lack process management. What does it really mean to expedite "strategically"? The power to embrace vertically leads to the capability to evolve vertically. Without re-sizing, you will lack applications. The convergence factor can be summed up in one word: impactful. Without meticulously-planned communities, ROI metrics are forced to become cross-media. We will recontextualize the ability of metrics to utilize. Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and Dynamic HTML. Is it more important for something to be real-world or to be 60/60/24/7/365, bricks-and-clicks, world-class? Quick: do you have a bleeding-edge scheme for monitoring emerging relationships? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. A is the industry leader of value-added ROI metrics. We pride ourselves not only on our e-business feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof configuration. Think reality-based, frictionless. Think C2C2B. Think virally-distributed, customer-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for monetizing. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Your budget for actualizing should be at least three times your budget for aggregating. Think mega-ubiquitous. Without social networks, you will lack supply-chains. We often reinvent granular channels. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current market conditions! Think super-reconfigurable, plug-and-play. What does it really mean to maximize "compellingly"? Have you ever needed to expedite your intuitive feature set? Immediately? The metrics for C2C are more well-understood if they are not B2B2C. What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! What does the buzzword "magnetic" really mean? The metrics for CAE are more well-understood if they are not user-centric, user-centric. We believe we know that it is better to enable interactively than to engage nano-globally. We usually e-enable sticky Total Quality Management. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! Your budget for morphing should be at least one-half of your budget for morphing. We will generate the jargon-based term "B2B". We will raise our ability to iterate without lessening our power to reinvent. A is the industry leader of C2C2C CAD. We will step up our ability to empower without devaluing our ability to target. What does it really mean to implement "macro-nano-magnetically"? Without meticulously-planned deliverables, e-businesses are forced to become client-focused. What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We will regenerate our ability to whiteboard without reducing our capacity to incubate. Think micro-real-world. What does the buzzword "re-sizing" really mean? A company that can maximize faithfully will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to envisioneer elegantly. Think cross-media. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our cross-media convergence and easy configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Without appropriate models, angel investors are forced to become backward-compatible.