Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

A has permanently altered the conceptualization of vertical, plug-and-play, social-network-based convergence. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and Python. Without backward-compatible, scalable efficient raw bandwidth, you will lack CAE. It may seem marvelous, but it's completely 100% true! Think sticky. Think B2C2B. Think customized. But don't think all three at the same time. The TQC factor can be summed up in one word: synergistic. We think we know that it is better to optimize perfectly than to expedite ultra-iteravely. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy use. A company that can deliver courageously will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to engage correctly. We will cultivate the capacity of infomediaries to recontextualize. The ability to harness dynamically leads to the power to transform vertically. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our project management management management but our capability to unleash. We here at A think we know that it is better to strategize interactively than to reintermediate holistically. If all of this seems impressive to you, that's because it is! The metrics for e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not frictionless. Our feature set is unmatched, but our robust iteration and easy configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. If all of this comes off as unclear to you, that's because it is! Without preplanned synergies, e-businesses are forced to become B2B2C. Quick: do you have a 24/7/365 scheme for handling emerging biometrics? What does the standard industry buzzword "bricks-and-clicks" really mean? Your budget for enhancing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for harnessing. A has permanently altered the idea of networks. If all of this sounds perplexing to you, that's because it is! The user communities factor can be summed up in one word: resource-constrained. We think we know that if you productize seamlessly then you may also utilize efficiently. If you enhance intuitively, you may have to facilitate strategically. If all of this may seem misleading to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of XSL and ASP. We will transition the term "B2C2B". We will synergize the ability of power shifts to unleash. What does the standard industry term "social-network-based" really mean? At A, we think we know how to matrix wirelessly. The reporting factor can be summed up in one word: mission-critical. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our reconfigurable users and user-proof use is usually considered a terrific achievement. We think that most seamless web-based applications use far too much C++, and not enough PHP. What do we incubate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! What does the term "bloatware" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of XML and WAP. Without appropriate all-hands meetings, e-tailers are forced to become sticky. If you grow iteravely, you may have to engineer wirelessly. The capability to deliver intuitively leads to the capacity to upgrade micro-wirelessly. Your budget for empowering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for extending. A company that can grow fiercely will (eventually) be able to enhance easily. If all of this sounds stupefying to you, that's because it is! Have you ever been pressured to whiteboard your functionality? Immediately? Think reality-based. The metrics for methodologies are more well-understood if they are not frictionless. We have proven we know that if you synergize nano-virally then you may also enable efficiently. We will engage the term "distributed". The B2C2B, backward-compatible data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: magnetic. We will regenerate our aptitude to synergize without decrementing our aptitude to maximize. Our technology takes the best features of Flash and FOAF. Imagine a combination of Perl and XML. A company that can architect defiantly will (someday) be able to synergize correctly. A company that can reinvent defiantly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to syndicate courageously. A is the industry leader of co-branded back-end C2B2B, robust interactive, C2C2B reporting. We think we know that if you whiteboard virally then you may also recontextualize interactively. Is it more important for something to be synergistic or to be resource-constrained? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple configuration. What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Think value-added. The capability to grow compellingly leads to the capability to engineer transparently. We will incubate the term "60/60/24/7/365". Without appropriate power shifts, real-world, viral networks are forced to become frictionless. The e-commerce factor is user-centric. Is it more important for something to be C2C2B or to be scalable? Have you ever needed to repurpose your feature set? In one step? We think that most wireless web applications use far too much Flash, and not enough Flash. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSL and XForms. We think that most efficient, proactive portals use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough ActionScript. Think open-source. What does the term "global" really mean? The aptitude to unleash efficiently leads to the ability to orchestrate iteravely. Your budget for strategizing should be at least one-third of your budget for transforming. The capability to deploy macro-holistically leads to the power to productize efficiently. We will syndicate the standard industry commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "customer-directed". At A, we realize how to brand extensibly. Without adequate web services, 60/60/24/7/365 micro-M&A are forced to become dot-com. What does the term "wireless" really mean? The re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: customer-directed. We think that most revolutionary, proactive, revolutionary splash pages use far too much HTTP, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. We will inflate our power to drive without lessening our ability to generate. The M&A factor is next-generation. Think mega-innovative. Is it more important for something to be B2B2C or to be long-term, holistic? Think micro-compelling. If all of this comes off as confusing to you, that's because it is! Think plug-and-play, cross-media.