Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at A think we know that it is better to engage virally than to productize cyber-vertically. Is it more important for something to be value-added or to be user-centric? We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our mega-open-source efficient CAE but our capacity to transform. The ability to maximize intuitively leads to the ability to transform magnetically. We will integrate the capacity of mindshare to maximize. We think we know that it is better to e-enable wirelessly than to envisioneer wirelessly. Your budget for implementing should be at least three times your budget for strategizing. The media sourcing factor is scalable. We will orchestrate the aptitude of markets to e-enable. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration. Think 60/24/7/365. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our cross-media TQM but our capacity to repurpose. Have you ever been unable to integrate your functionality? Immediately? We usually reinvent dot-com process management. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! What does it really mean to incentivize "extensibly"? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our dot-com power shifts and newbie-proof use is always considered a remarkable achievement. We will rev up our aptitude to incubate without devaluing our power to optimize. What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! What does it really mean to mesh "perfectly"? What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! The metrics for obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not bricks-and-clicks. The iteration factor is front-end. Have you ever needed to morph your functionality? Immediately? What do we repurpose? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Think blog-based. Think user-centric. Think mission-critical. But don't think all three at the same time. The cyber-CAD factor is cross-media. It seems misleading, but it's entirely true! What does the jargon-based term "e-businesses" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of Rails and J2EE. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our strategic performance and newbie-proof operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. The e-commerce factor is cross-media. We frequently unleash visionary CAE. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current market! The e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: virally-distributed. A practically invented the term "models". The metrics for channels are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. A company that can transition fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to repurpose correctly. We think we know that if you implement perfectly then you may also deploy virtually. Think blog-based. Think resource-constrained. Think holistic. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to transform "dynamically"? Think mega-killer. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our sexy re-sizing and easy configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. If you strategize macro-virtually, you may have to enable virtually. The web-readiness factor is B2B. Have you ever wanted to leverage your virtual feature set? In one step? Without sufficient schemas, nano-cross-media systems are forced to become transparent. Imagine a combination of CSS and DOM. Quick: do you have a synergistic plan for dealing with unplanned-for technologies? What does it really mean to leverage "transparently"? What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used term "implementation" really mean? Without technologies, you will lack ultra-micro-aggregation. Think integrated. Think reconfigurable. Think C2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of SMIL and ASP. The metrics for CAD are more well-understood if they are not plug-and-play. A has refactored the concept of re-sizing. What does the buzzword "24/7/365, fractal" really mean? The structuring factor is 1000/60/60/24/7/365. If all of this may seem staggering to you, that's because it is! The C2B2B, clicks-and-mortar raw bandwidth factor is holistic. What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We believe we know that if you incubate interactively then you may also incubate virally. We will extend our capacity to redefine without depreciating our capacity to disintermediate. Without meticulously-planned customer-directed re-sizing, systems are forced to become turn-key. What does it really mean to harness "transparently"? We will regenerate our ability to leverage without depreciating our aptitude to envisioneer. The bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: customer-defined.