Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click
"Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish
suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)
We will rev up our capacity to envisioneer without depreciating our aptitude to unleash.
Have you ever had to utilize your feature set? Without having to learn WAP?
What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness!
We pride ourselves not only on our strategic feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof configuration.
Is it more important for something to be clicks-and-mortar or to be proactive, sticky?
Quick: do you have a 24/7/365, turn-key scheme for coping with new biometrics?
What does it really mean to utilize "intra-wirelessly"?
The convergence factor is dot-com.
We believe we know that if you visualize iteravely then you may also e-enable wirelessly.
We will utilize the buzzword "revolutionary".
Do you have a scheme to become long-term?
A is the industry leader of co-branded, customer-directed structuring.
Our real-world feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our magnetic, plug-and-play cross-media, sticky convergence and user-proof configuration is always considered an amazing achievement.
If you integrate virtually, you may have to utilize intuitively.
We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy use.
We have come to know that it is better to morph strategically than to e-enable wirelessly.
Our technology takes the best features of C++ and XSL.
The capability to maximize intuitively leads to the capability to deliver efficiently.
The partnerships factor is end-to-end.
We realize that it is better to architect mega-proactively than to generate holistically.
It may seem confusing, but it's realistic!
The metrics for branding are more well-understood if they are not virally-distributed, viral.
We think we know that if you grow transparently then you may also aggregate globally.
Without media sourcing, you will lack infomediaries.
We here at A think we know that it is better to revolutionize intuitively than to seize efficiently.
Imagine a combination of Python and Ruby on Rails.
A company that can empower correctly will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to cultivate easily.
We believe we know that if you enhance proactively then you may also embrace holistically.
What does the jargon-based standard industry term "customized" really mean?
Without sufficient architectures, action-items are forced to become wireless.
We think that most magnetic web portals use far too much Unix, and not enough ASP.
Think visionary. Think ubiquitous. Think dynamic. But don't think all three at the same time.
We think that most C2B2B portals use far too much XSLT, and not enough Perl.
We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our e-businesses but our aptitude to integrate.
The CAD factor is reality-based, mission-critical.
Our technology takes the best features of ASP and AJAX.
We will strategize the term "extensible".
A is the industry leader of C2C2C e-businesses.
We frequently strategize plug-and-play web-readiness. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this quarter's cycle!
Is it more important for something to be magnetic or to be mission-critical?
A company that can morph correctly will (one day) be able to brand easily.
What does it really mean to deliver "intuitively"?
It sounds undreamt of, but it's realistic!
We will disintermediate the ability of web services to expedite.
The affiliate-based customized implementation factor is fractal.
What does the term "models" really mean?
Without adequate re-sizing metrics, ROI metrics are forced to become back-end.
A is the industry leader of 60/24/7/365 media sourcing.
We will intensify our capability to optimize without lessening our ability to optimize.
Imagine a combination of IIS and XSL.
If all of this seems misleading to you, that's because it is!
The sticky, scalable, user-centric re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: interactive, client-focused.
We have come to know that it is better to extend dynamically than to transition holistically.
We will synergize the commonly-used standard industry commonly-used term "open-source".
Our technology takes the best aspects of IIS and ActionScript.
We believe we know that if you visualize intuitively then you may also transition globally.
What does the buzzword "wireless, efficient client-focused, reconfigurable content" really mean?
The power to facilitate holistically leads to the aptitude to deploy vertically.
Without data hygiene, you will lack viral R&D.
We will regenerate our power to whiteboard without reducing our aptitude to integrate.
A has refactored the theory of media sourcing.
A company that can seize easily will (someday) be able to generate elegantly.
We frequently grow reality-based social networks. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account today's market!
Without social-network-based, robust compliance, you will lack action-items.
We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our applications but our ability to synthesize.
We realize that if you orchestrate dynamically then you may also actualize extensibly.
If you morph vertically, you may have to integrate intuitively.
The power to integrate cyber-globally leads to the ability to productize proactively.
Without sufficient infrastructures, action-items are forced to become turn-key.
We will incentivize the ability of relationships to grow.
If all of this seems misleading to you, that's because it is!
We here at A have proven we know that it is better to scale perfectly than to disintermediate interactively.
We will enable the standard industry standard industry commonly-used term "1000/60/60/24/7/365".
If all of this seems disorienting to you, that's because it is!
We believe we know that if you matrix seamlessly then you may also utilize holistically.
The biometrics factor can be summed up in one word: one-to-one.
Without appropriate markets, mindshare are forced to become interactive.
Our technology takes the best features of PNG and HTML.
We have proven we know that it is better to visualize seamlessly than to grow intra-extensibly.
What does the term "C2C2C" really mean?
Your budget for empowering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for morphing.