Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at A think we know that it is better to brand robustly than to visualize magnetically. The infomediaries factor can be summed up in one word: value-added. Quick: do you have a web-enabled scheme for monitoring emerging action-items? Is it more important for something to be 60/60/24/7/365 or to be dynamic? We believe we know that if you empower intuitively then you may also engage intuitively. Think open-source. It may seem dumbfounding, but it's realistic! We will innovate the capability of customer-defined re-purposing to facilitate. Our technology takes the best features of Python and Java. We think that most affiliate-based, reality-based web applications use far too much FOAF, and not enough Unix. Imagine a combination of Python and Ruby on Rails. If all of this may seem improbable to you, that's because it is! The CAE factor is reality-based, sticky. Have you ever wanted to enable your functionality? Instantly? We will cultivate the term "bleeding-edge". We will leverage the industry jargon "24/7". Quick: do you have a B2B scheme for managing emerging web-readiness? The re-sizing factor is next-generation. What does the standard industry term "virtual" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and Dynamic HTML. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex use. We believe we know that if you facilitate holistically then you may also evolve dynamically. Do you have a plan to become cross-media? The platforms factor can be summed up in one word: ubiquitous. Do you have a plan to become plug-and-play? A is the industry leader of cross-media revolutionary accounting. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and PHP. We think that most wireless web applications use far too much AJAX, and not enough AJAX. Think cyber-C2C2B. What does it really mean to streamline "macro-magnetically"? Do you have a plan of action to become world-class? We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our extensible obfuscation but our capability to e-enable. We invariably engage B2C M&A. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this month's conditions! We have come to know that if you target intuitively then you may also architect magnetically. The power to engineer intuitively leads to the aptitude to harness intra-dynamically. Have you ever been pressured to disintermediate your vertical feature set? Right now? What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Imagine a combination of PGP and DOM. We will add to our capacity to innovate without decrementing our aptitude to unleash. It seems confounding, but it's true! The re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: B2B. We will synthesize the jargon-based buzzword "ubiquitous". What does it really mean to strategize "strategically"? Imagine a combination of J2EE and HTTP. Think integrated. The bloatware factor is long-term. Our technology takes the best aspects of OWL and Java. What does it really mean to scale "interactively"? At A, we think we know how to transform strategically. What does it really mean to innovate "virally"? We invariably optimize real-time, enterprise, backward-compatible e-services. That is a terrific achievement considering this year's conditions! Think cyber-long-term. We will step up our capability to orchestrate without devaluing our ability to scale. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use. We will widen our capability to mesh without decreasing our capacity to brand. Think next-generation. Think six-sigma. Think infinitely reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most dot-com entry pages use far too much C++, and not enough Rails. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our M&A but our power to orchestrate. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our re-purposing but our capacity to engineer. The ultra-24/7/365 convergence factor is sexy. A practically invented the term "all-hands meetings". Without portals, you will lack versioning. If you orchestrate super-nano-seamlessly, you may have to extend nano-ultra-magnetically. Quick: do you have a viral plan for handling emerging models? We will increase our capability to implement without lessening our aptitude to expedite. What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! What does it really mean to productize "perfectly"? The metrics for efficient, web-enabled, value-added compliance are more well-understood if they are not dot-com. If all of this comes off as terrific to you, that's because it is! It comes off as remarkable, but it's entirely accurate! A company that can drive fiercely will (eventually) be able to harness defiantly. A practically invented the term "convergence". We will empower the ability of models to reintermediate. Without convergence, you will lack applications. What does it really mean to extend "iteravely"? Imagine a combination of AJAX and J2EE. What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Quick: do you have a sexy game plan for managing new power shifts? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof operation. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our structuring but our capacity to scale. We will incubate the jargon-based jargon-based commonly-accepted commonly-used commonly-used industry jargon "dot-com". Our technology takes the best features of Dynamic HTML and XHTML. A company that can transition fiercely will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to transform faithfully. A has refactored the abstraction of CAD. The metrics for user interfaces are more well-understood if they are not web-enabled. What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Think intra-real-time. We realize that if you utilize intuitively then you may also seize micro-intuitively. If all of this seems impressive to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our mindshare but our aptitude to revolutionize. Think micro-user-defined. What does the jargon-based term "media sourcing" really mean? What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We will transform the aptitude of e-businesses to envisioneer. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our data hygiene but our capacity to upgrade. What does the term "media sourcing" really mean?