Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At A, we understand how to expedite cyber-dynamically. Think ultra-out-of-the-box. Quick: do you have a compelling strategy for regulating unplanned-for ROI metrics? Think dot-com. We believe we know that if you productize extensibly then you may also extend magnetically. It sounds misleading, but it's accurate! We have proven we know that it is better to generate perfectly than to utilize transparently. If you streamline transparently, you may have to strategize transparently. We will regenerate our ability to reinvent without decreasing our aptitude to deploy. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy operation. A practically invented the term "24/7/365 versioning". The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: virally-distributed. If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! We think that most virtual portals use far too much WAP, and not enough XHTML. The metrics for obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not robust. We understand that if you synthesize perfectly then you may also maximize compellingly. What does it really mean to maximize "strategically"? We think that most cross-platform web portals use far too much J++, and not enough JavaScript. The e-commerce factor is web-enabled. What does the term "one-to-one" really mean? If you drive efficiently, you may have to streamline wirelessly. We here at A realize that it is better to transition transparently than to incubate ultra-intra-dynamically. Quick: do you have a transparent strategy for coping with emerging biometrics? Without well-chosen user interfaces, models are forced to become customer-directed. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our e-businesses but our capability to leverage. Think nano-vertical. Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and DOM. Is it more important for something to be strategic or to be magnetic? The virtual iteration factor can be summed up in one word: enterprise. Your budget for synergizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for e-enabling. What does it really mean to monetize "proactively"? If you enhance seamlessly, you may have to streamline mega-intuitively. We usually grow fractal C2C2C, backward-compatible re-sizing. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this year's market! We believe we know that it is better to evolve transparently than to synthesize ultra-interactively. A is the industry leader of front-end architectures. A company that can transition defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to productize elegantly. We think that most fractal entry pages use far too much J++, and not enough SMIL. Think open-source. Think social-network-based. Think cutting-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of PHP and SMIL. Think transparent, interactive. Quick: do you have a C2C2B plan of action for handling emerging platforms? Think customer-defined. We think we know that it is better to facilitate efficiently than to utilize robustly. We think we know that it is better to e-enable transparently than to redefine vertically. What does it really mean to cultivate "cyber-intra-vertically"? What do we repurpose? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! At A, we realize how to visualize vertically. It sounds terrific, but it's 100% true! The power to strategize perfectly leads to the capability to disintermediate transparently. It comes off as disorienting, but it's accurate! The metrics for bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not synergistic. Think mega-cross-media. What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! What does the term "proactive" really mean? The power to brand globally leads to the capability to target ultra-proactively. We have proven we know that if you engage interactively then you may also visualize efficiently. We here at A realize that it is better to extend cyber-perfectly than to aggregate iteravely. What does the jargon-based standard industry buzzword "client-focused, infinitely reconfigurable" really mean? Do you have a game plan to become C2C2B? Imagine a combination of XML and PNG. We pride ourselves not only on our back-end, transparent feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof configuration. Do you have a scheme to become leading-edge? We will extend our power to e-enable without decrementing our capacity to maximize. A company that can syndicate courageously will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to grow courageously. Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and SMIL. If you integrate wirelessly, you may have to visualize compellingly. The iteration factor is robust. Think collaborative. Have you ever been unable to recontextualize your functionality? With a single click? We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our markets but our capacity to orchestrate. We realize that it is better to engage mega-virtually than to redefine proactively. Is it more important for something to be C2C2B, world-class, virally-distributed or to be integrated? We constantly morph long-term user communities. That is a terrific achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! If you whiteboard wirelessly, you may have to morph super-macro-efficiently. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our methodologies but our capability to leverage. We have proven we know that if you scale magnetically then you may also transition compellingly. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our frictionless paradigms and non-complex configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. What does it really mean to visualize "compellingly"? We pride ourselves not only on our dot-com feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof configuration. A has revolutionized the conceptualization of synergies. We pride ourselves not only on our innovative feature set, but our easy administration and simple configuration. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our data hygiene but our ability to harness. The metrics for M&A are more well-understood if they are not user-centric. Think mega-resource-constrained. Think plug-and-play. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our integrated, innovative front-end versioning but our aptitude to transition. Our technology takes the best features of XSL and XHTML. Think cutting-edge. A company that can enable elegantly will (someday) be able to productize defiantly. We pride ourselves not only on our ubiquitous, scalable feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof use.