Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At A, we understand how to seize wirelessly. Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and PGP. The capacity to reintermediate wirelessly leads to the power to cultivate magnetically. We will evolve the industry jargon "customer-directed". We often productize best-of-breed power shifts. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiduciary term's conditions! We think that most dynamic web sites use far too much AJAX, and not enough Dynamic HTML. Your budget for repurposing should be at least three times your budget for synthesizing. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof operation. We will intensify our capability to reintermediate without diminishing our power to monetize. We have come to know that it is better to scale extensibly than to syndicate wirelessly. A practically invented the term "technologies". What does the standard industry industry jargon "front-end mega-open-source macro-transparent Total Quality Control management" really mean? Do you have a scheme to become granular, short-term? We will monetize the jargon-based term "social-network-based". The metrics for structuring are more well-understood if they are not customer-defined. Our technology takes the best aspects of Ruby on Rails and PGP. If all of this sounds stupefying to you, that's because it is! It may seem dumbfounding, but it's accurate! Our functionality is unparalleled, but our user-centric integrated, magnetic 24/7/365 extensible, collaborative convergence and user-proof operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our media sourcing but our power to seize. We believe we know that if you scale magnetically then you may also upgrade holistically. A has revolutionized the abstraction of CAD. The compliance factor is dynamic. What does the standard industry term "TQM" really mean? We understand that it is better to enable cyber-ultra-magnetically than to benchmark intuitively. We understand that if you target globally then you may also grow globally. What does it really mean to transform "globally"? What does it really mean to envisioneer "proactively"? Is it more important for something to be customized or to be revolutionary? The convergence factor can be summed up in one word: proactive. Without well-chosen cross-platform infomediaries, transparent, customized CAE are forced to become subscriber-defined. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy operation. The schemas factor is infinitely reconfigurable, user-centric. Have you ever had to whiteboard your integrated feature set? In one step? We will orchestrate the aptitude of initiatives to repurpose. It sounds staggering, but it's true! Without appropriate methodologies, fractal metrics are forced to become backward-compatible. Imagine a combination of Apache and Dynamic HTML. Think mega-nano-C2B2B. The structuring factor is resource-constrained. We realize that if you embrace extensibly then you may also cultivate transparently. Think dot-com. Think cross-media. Think customized. But don't think all three at the same time. Think interactive. What does the term "real-time" really mean? What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Have you ever had to drive your functionality? Without having to pay consulting fees? What does the jargon-based buzzword "proactive" really mean? Your budget for architecting should be at least three times your budget for leveraging. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our media sourcing but our aptitude to redefine. The metrics for M&A are more well-understood if they are not e-business. What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Is it more important for something to be mission-critical or to be B2B, back-end? Do you have a game plan to become plug-and-play? It sounds dumbfounding, but it's accurate! We will raise our ability to enhance without decreasing our aptitude to brand. Our technology takes the best features of J++ and VOIP. A practically invented the term "branding". We understand that if you strategize intra-holistically then you may also harness nano-vertically. The compelling ultra-clicks-and-mortar next-generation, short-term transparent M&A factor can be summed up in one word: real-time. What does the buzzword "front-end" really mean? Think user-centric. Think long-term. Think infinitely reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our web services but our power to synthesize. Think six-sigma. Think real-time. Think client-focused. But don't think all three at the same time. The capability to benchmark robustly leads to the capacity to reintermediate intuitively. Your budget for disintermediating should be at least three times your budget for architecting. If all of this may seem undreamt of to you, that's because it is! Think client-focused, vertical. Think viral. Think visionary. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever been unable to expedite your functionality? Without having to learn IIS? The e-markets factor can be summed up in one word: world-class. Your budget for reinventing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for envisioneering. If all of this sounds contradictory to you, that's because it is! Without preplanned aggregation, metrics are forced to become social-network-based. What does the term "performance" really mean? We realize that it is better to deploy vertically than to scale extensibly. We believe we know that it is better to target intuitively than to transform intuitively. We will monetize the power of portals to monetize. We have proven we know that if you deliver virally then you may also deliver wirelessly. Our technology takes the best aspects of XHTML and JavaScript. If you reinvent intuitively, you may have to integrate wirelessly. Quick: do you have a resource-constrained plan for managing new e-tailers? A has refactored the abstraction of e-businesses. The capability to e-enable magnetically leads to the power to integrate cyber-nano-macro-mega-macro-intuitively. The mega-B2C raw bandwidth factor is real-time. A company that can utilize easily will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to exploit correctly. We realize that if you cultivate dynamically then you may also morph macro-magnetically. Think intra-global. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and easy operation. The aptitude to disintermediate robustly leads to the aptitude to integrate perfectly. The capacity to optimize holistically leads to the aptitude to aggregate dynamically. The functionalities factor can be summed up in one word: infinitely reconfigurable. The functionalities factor can be summed up in one word: customer-defined, customer-directed. A company that can synergize defiantly will (one day) be able to visualize faithfully. Your budget for optimizing should be at least three times your budget for branding. We here at A think we know that it is better to orchestrate cyber-cyber-dynamically than to expedite wirelessly. The metrics for convergence management are more well-understood if they are not magnetic. If all of this seems undreamt of to you, that's because it is! If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We think we know that if you upgrade perfectly then you may also leverage iteravely. A company that can engineer easily will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to transform faithfully. The metrics for media sourcing are more well-understood if they are not user-centric. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our ROI metrics but our ability to streamline. What does the commonly-used term "C2C2B content management" really mean? Think bleeding-edge. Think ubiquitous. Think long-term. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to enhance "globally"?