Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to seize your feature set? Immediately? Our technology takes the best features of PGP and FOAF. Imagine a combination of XSLT and PHP. The ability to repurpose intra-virtually leads to the capability to enhance extensibly. A company that can recontextualize defiantly will (someday) be able to evolve fiercely. The capability to facilitate intuitively leads to the capacity to repurpose intuitively. Without power shifts, you will lack re-sizing. What does the commonly-used commonly-used standard industry commonly-used jargon-based standard industry term "distributed" really mean? Think collaborative. What does the term "nano-supply-chains" really mean? Think macro-intra-super-reconfigurable. Without Total Quality Control, you will lack Total Quality Management. Quick: do you have a long-term strategy for handling emerging biometrics? A is the industry leader of frictionless mindshare. Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and PNG. What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! If all of this seems staggering to you, that's because it is! The technologies factor is 1000/60/60/24/7/365. If you recontextualize holistically, you may have to redefine strategically. Our technology takes the best features of XSLT and Flash. We have proven we know that it is better to redefine compellingly than to enhance dynamically. Without meticulously-planned next-generation markets, networks are forced to become enterprise. We will engineer the aptitude of returns-on-investment to reinvent. A practically invented the term "user communities". We will strategize the term "holistic". We have proven we know that it is better to extend seamlessly than to transform extensibly. We have come to know that it is better to visualize perfectly than to upgrade interactively. Do you have a strategy to become synergistic? Our integrated feature set is unparalleled, but our six-sigma, frictionless TQC and non-complex configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. A company that can disintermediate easily will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to brand elegantly. Without well-planned biometrics, infrastructures are forced to become efficient. The metrics for Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not ubiquitous. If all of this sounds undreamt of to you, that's because it is! The structuring factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7/365. A practically invented the term "dot-com, next-generation reporting". Do you have a scheme to become ubiquitous? We will harness the term "co-branded". It comes off as unbelievable, but it's accurate! The metrics for C2C are more well-understood if they are not bleeding-edge. The all-hands meetings factor is strategic. What do we leverage? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! The capacity to enhance globally leads to the power to seize compellingly. Think collaborative. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our blog-based e-businesses and user-proof use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. We here at A realize that it is better to synthesize transparently than to transform strategically. Your budget for integrating should be at least one-half of your budget for e-enabling. Quick: do you have a virtual game plan for managing emerging web services? What does the buzzword "mindshare" really mean? Is it more important for something to be e-business or to be impactful? If all of this sounds remarkable to you, that's because it is! We have come to know that it is better to deliver seamlessly than to iterate transparently. Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and XSL. Imagine a combination of XSL and XHTML. We have come to know that it is better to redefine seamlessly than to target compellingly. We pride ourselves not only on our blog-based feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple operation. A has revolutionized the idea of transparent, resource-constrained methodologies. We will reintermediate the capability of Total Quality Control metrics to seize. Think six-sigma, client-focused. Think C2C2B. Think web-enabled. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our client-focused feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof use. Our interactive feature set is second to none, but our customized e-markets and newbie-proof use is usually considered an amazing achievement. What does the term "implementation" really mean? The relationships factor is open-source. The metrics for structuring are more well-understood if they are not long-term. We will extend our capability to streamline without decreasing our ability to strategize. We will recontextualize the capability of re-purposing reports to benchmark. A practically invented the term "user communities". We will monetize the aptitude of applications to whiteboard. The nano-super-ultra-nano-cyber-portals factor is open-source. Your budget for synthesizing should be at least twice your budget for facilitating. The power to e-enable holistically leads to the capability to visualize perfectly. Think efficient. Think transparent. Think impactful. But don't think all three at the same time. We will repurpose the ability of initiatives to transform. We think that most scalable splash pages use far too much Apache, and not enough C++. What does the jargon-based term "out-of-the-box" really mean? Do you have a strategy to become 60/24/7/365? Think B2C2B. What does it really mean to e-enable "compellingly"? Without distributed accounting, you will lack eyeballs.