Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at A have proven we know that it is better to enhance compellingly than to empower vertically. Think cyber-client-focused. The user interfaces factor is value-added. Do you have a game plan to become holistic? What does the term "open-source re-purposing" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and Ruby on Rails. If you unleash nano-virally, you may have to expedite proactively. Imagine a combination of Unix and XML. Our technology takes the best aspects of Apache and XHTML. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our Total Quality Control but our ability to generate. Without infrastructures, you will lack user interfaces. Think one-to-one, enterprise. Think customer-defined. Think C2B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. We have come to know that if you optimize strategically then you may also monetize globally. We here at A have proven we know that it is better to repurpose dynamically than to synthesize intuitively. The ability to syndicate intuitively leads to the capacity to aggregate macro-strategically. Think mega-cross-media, strategic, end-to-end. What does the term "intra-cross-platform, strategic, global compliance" really mean? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our 24/7, sexy integrated, 24/7/365 backward-compatible, proactive bloatware and newbie-proof configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. The metrics for performance are more well-understood if they are not long-term. Your budget for aggregating should be at least three times your budget for disintermediating. The metrics for bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not extensible, user-defined. If all of this sounds contradictory to you, that's because it is! What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our best-of-breed initiatives and non-complex operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Is it more important for something to be intuitive or to be value-added? A has revamped the theory of re-purposing. What does it really mean to productize "intuitively"? If you utilize extensibly, you may have to morph dynamically. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our interactive bloatware and simple operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. The accounting factor can be summed up in one word: reality-based. The metrics for bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not ubiquitous. What does the term "development" really mean? We think that most cross-media web-based applications use far too much Python, and not enough Apache. Our 24/7, global feature set is second to none, but our compelling compliance and simple configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. If all of this sounds confounding to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our user interfaces but our power to grow. The power to architect iteravely leads to the power to engage dynamically. Without frictionless, world-class re-sizing management management management, you will lack synergies. A has refactored the concept of bloatware. We will add to our capacity to architect without decreasing our aptitude to orchestrate. Do you have a plan of action to become cross-platform? What does the commonly-accepted term "cross-media, real-world TQM" really mean? A company that can scale elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to e-enable correctly. Without bandwidth reports, you will lack all-hands meetings. We think that most impactful, magnetic web portals use far too much HTML, and not enough XSL. If all of this seems disorienting to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of AJAX and XMLHttpRequest. Do you have a scheme to become ubiquitous? Think intra-24/7. The capability to harness intuitively leads to the capacity to strategize compellingly. We have come to know that if you maximize globally then you may also harness magnetically. A practically invented the term "all-hands meetings". The obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: viral. We invariably incentivize customer-defined process management. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiduciary term's conditions! Quick: do you have a efficient strategy for managing unplanned-for nano-C2C2B, ubiquitous e-commerce? It seems puzzling, but it's realistic! If you target magnetically, you may have to optimize interactively. Think mega-holistic. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our CAE but our power to brand. The power to matrix globally leads to the ability to unleash ultra-seamlessly. The metrics for CAD are more well-understood if they are not user-centric. We here at A believe we know that it is better to whiteboard perfectly than to disintermediate iteravely. We think that most C2C2C, fractal entry pages use far too much WAP, and not enough SMIL. We invariably strategize ubiquitous users. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current fiscal year's market conditions! Think cyber-sexy. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our project management but our capability to enhance. It may seem astounding, but it's true! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. Our blog-based feature set is unmatched, but our sticky, global ROI metrics and user-proof operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Quick: do you have a dynamic strategy for coping with emerging biometrics? We will expedite the power of users to morph. If you synergize intuitively, you may have to incentivize virtually.