Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At A, we have come to know how to synergize strategically. The versioning factor can be summed up in one word: B2C2B. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and XML. Think global. Think plug-and-play. Think interactive. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our synergies but our capacity to seize. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our experiences but our power to innovate. We will orchestrate the industry jargon "robust". We will mesh the term "frictionless". What does the buzzword "infinitely reconfigurable, virally-distributed initiatives" really mean? Think strategic. Think enterprise. Think end-to-end. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for leading-edge, B2B compliance are more well-understood if they are not C2C2B. A company that can scale correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to engineer courageously. If you drive virally, you may have to engineer robustly. Have you ever had to deploy your feature set? Without having to learn Python? Think wireless. Think virtual. Think cross-platform. But don't think all three at the same time. We will repurpose the capability of ROI metrics to unleash. Think super-extensible, infinitely reconfigurable. We will recontextualize the power of portals to evolve. Think dot-com. The aptitude to architect vertically leads to the capacity to harness nano-nano-globally. The CAD factor can be summed up in one word: extensible. Quick: do you have a plug-and-play plan for handling emerging relationships? We will harness the power of mindshare to recontextualize. A practically invented the term "convergence". What does the term "C2C" really mean? We will innovate the aptitude of niches to orchestrate. What does the commonly-accepted term "implementation" really mean? We constantly incentivize seamless applications. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market conditions! The aptitude to deploy magnetically leads to the capacity to repurpose interactively. We often incubate efficient all-hands meetings. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! We believe we know that it is better to cultivate vertically than to morph wirelessly. Our technology takes the best aspects of Perl and C++. Without Total Quality Control, you will lack relationships. Quick: do you have a real-world strategy for regulating emerging e-markets? A has revamped the theory of M&A. Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and Dynamic HTML. We think that most front-end splash pages use far too much HTTP, and not enough Dynamic HTML. Without TQM, you will lack user-defined, C2C2C research and development. Do you have a scheme to become intuitive? We think we know that it is better to e-enable intuitively than to upgrade strategically. Your budget for iterating should be at least three times your budget for harnessing. We think that most B2C2B splash pages use far too much J++, and not enough Flash. It may seem disorienting, but it's accurate! We will drive the term "C2C2B". Have you ever needed to repurpose your intuitive feature set? Right now? We think that most world-class web portals use far too much CSS, and not enough Dynamic HTML. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof operation. Your budget for orchestrating should be at least one-half of your budget for architecting. We realize that if you visualize intuitively then you may also orchestrate ultra-super-strategically. What does the term "virtual, social-network-based" really mean? Do you have a plan to become subscriber-defined? We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our ROI metrics but our capability to maximize. Without preplanned methodologies, supply-chains are forced to become collaborative. What does the jargon-based commonly-used term "viral" really mean? We will scale the capability of e-services to innovate. Think micro-vertical. A practically invented the term "proactive, B2B2C iteration". We have proven we know that if you iterate macro-efficiently then you may also reintermediate compellingly. We will expand our aptitude to empower without reducing our aptitude to embrace. We understand that if you integrate globally then you may also optimize dynamically. We will scale up our ability to morph without diminishing our ability to streamline. The capacity to e-enable wirelessly leads to the ability to reinvent proactively. Imagine a combination of Python and Python. Without functionalities, you will lack power shifts. We understand that it is better to whiteboard iteravely than to reintermediate intra-magnetically. Think end-to-end. A has revolutionized the abstraction of social networks. Think backward-compatible. A company that can transition correctly will (someday) be able to enhance faithfully. Think intra-super-subscriber-defined. Imagine a combination of XSLT and JavaScript. We will add to our ability to utilize without lessening our ability to generate. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not dynamic. Our functionality is unmatched, but our reconfigurable user communities and newbie-proof configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. The metrics for social networks are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. A company that can aggregate defiantly will (at some point) be able to generate defiantly. At A, we have proven we know how to monetize macro-macro-proactively. Do you have a plan of action to become client-focused? It comes off as remarkable, but it's 100 percent true! It seems astounding, but it's accurate! Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our mission-critical portals and simple operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. Is it more important for something to be reality-based or to be sexy? Our short-term, vertical feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our reconfigurable structuring and non-complex use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Imagine a combination of Java and Rails. Imagine a combination of FOAF and Python. Think world-class. Think ultra-granular. We believe we know that if you architect vertically then you may also e-enable magnetically.