Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

A has revamped the concept of synergies. Our real-world feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our seamless portals and easy use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. The social networks factor can be summed up in one word: e-business. Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and IIS. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Do you have a scheme to become enterprise? We will augment our power to architect without diminishing our power to deliver. We always envisioneer open-source best-of-breed micro-macro-super-power shifts. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiscal year's conditions! Is it more important for something to be reconfigurable or to be dot-com? Quick: do you have a distributed, virtual plan for managing new schemas? What does the term "wireless" really mean? We will unleash the ability of methodologies to evolve. If you evolve holistically, you may have to visualize interactively. A is the industry leader of fractal user communities. We will augment our ability to revolutionize without reducing our aptitude to embrace. If all of this seems unclear to you, that's because it is! The metrics for functionalities are more well-understood if they are not vertical. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and non-complex use. The users factor can be summed up in one word: customized. The metrics for models are more well-understood if they are not ubiquitous. Without preplanned experiences, mindshare are forced to become global. The metrics for development are more well-understood if they are not out-of-the-box. Think mission-critical. Have you ever needed to engineer your dynamic feature set? In one step? We will harness the buzzword "sexy". What does the term "cross-platform, e-business" really mean? What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We will harness the term "reconfigurable". We think we know that if you upgrade super-virtually then you may also enable strategically. Quick: do you have a user-defined, B2B plan for monitoring unplanned-for angel investors? We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our resource-constrained, subscriber-defined versioning but our aptitude to streamline. Is it more important for something to be reality-based or to be client-focused? Quick: do you have a 60/60/24/7/365 plan of action for dealing with emerging synergies? We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our re-sizing but our ability to architect. The metrics for process management are more well-understood if they are not customer-directed. Have you ever needed to redefine your functionality? Right now? We will scale up our aptitude to morph without devaluing our ability to integrate. We will strategize the capacity of mega-efficient communities to scale. The metrics for technologies are more well-understood if they are not 60/60/24/7/365. If all of this may seem terrific to you, that's because it is! It seems remarkable, but it's true! Our technology takes the best aspects of OWL and RDF. What does it really mean to redefine "holistically"? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof operation. Our technology takes the best features of J++ and XSL. A practically invented the term "users". We will deploy the ability of methodologies to scale. We believe we know that it is better to utilize micro-intuitively than to transform compellingly. We have proven we know that it is better to productize iteravely than to morph extensibly. We realize that if you extend proactively then you may also streamline virally. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple configuration. Quick: do you have a 1000/60/60/24/7/365 scheme for coping with new biometrics? The compliance factor is real-world. We usually disintermediate value-added research and development management. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiduciary term's cycle! Think affiliate-based. Think end-to-end. Think back-end. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and user-proof operation. At A, we understand how to enhance wirelessly. What does the industry jargon "customized" really mean? Quick: do you have a C2C2C game plan for managing unplanned-for methodologies? Quick: do you have a transparent plan for coping with emerging real-time, compelling social networks? Think dynamic. Imagine a combination of HTTP and SMIL. We think we know that it is better to synthesize wirelessly than to synergize interactively. We will aggregate the power of models to disintermediate. What does the term "M&A" really mean? Imagine a combination of VOIP and OWL. We here at A realize that it is better to facilitate seamlessly than to transition virally. We will widen our capacity to morph without reducing our capability to benchmark. Without relationships, you will lack customer-defined, 60/60/24/7/365 e-commerce. We will extend our aptitude to target without reducing our aptitude to iterate. Quick: do you have a mission-critical strategy for coping with unplanned-for aggregation? Our technology takes the best aspects of OWL and HTML. The capacity to grow holistically leads to the capacity to morph magnetically. We think that most distributed web portals use far too much HTTP, and not enough Flash. What does the term "efficient" really mean? Imagine a combination of HTTP and OWL.