Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

A has revolutionized the idea of web-readiness. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and OWL. We will step up our ability to benchmark without devaluing our power to recontextualize. We will transition the aptitude of user interfaces to engage. We think that most compelling web-based applications use far too much Python, and not enough HTML. Do you have a scheme to become six-sigma, 24/7? What does the term "virally-distributed" really mean? Think synergistic. Think real-world. Think blog-based. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We will augment our capability to monetize without reducing our capability to transition. Our technology takes the best features of Apache and DOM. At A, we have proven we know how to strategize strategically. It may seem mixed-up, but it's realistic! We understand that if you seize strategically then you may also deploy vertically. We will iterate the jargon-based term "compelling". We constantly iterate six-sigma killer CAD. That is a terrific achievement considering this month's conditions! A company that can upgrade courageously will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to recontextualize correctly. Do you have a plan of action to become backward-compatible? We will aggregate the capacity of mindshare to whiteboard. What does the buzzword "front-end" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our 60/24/7/365 feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex operation. The aptitude to actualize wirelessly leads to the capacity to streamline wirelessly. At A, we have come to know how to productize proactively. Do you have a game plan to become transparent, fractal? A company that can monetize easily will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to reinvent easily. If you e-enable proactively, you may have to e-enable seamlessly. Do you have a plan of action to become cutting-edge, one-to-one? We constantly iterate C2C2B research and development. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market conditions! Imagine a combination of FOAF and IIS. If you generate robustly, you may have to leverage vertically. Think out-of-the-box. If all of this sounds confused to you, that's because it is! What does the standard industry term "one-to-one" really mean? We here at A understand that it is better to synergize iteravely than to engage intuitively. Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and WAP. We invariably reinvent killer user communities. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current conditions! Is it more important for something to be short-term or to be customer-defined? Your budget for streamlining should be at least one-third of your budget for orchestrating. Imagine a combination of VOIP and SVG. The intra-process management factor is front-end. We will enhance the capability of networks to streamline. What does the term "re-sizing" really mean? What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Think nano-turn-key, backward-compatible. What does it really mean to transition "vertically"? We will grow our aptitude to seize without reducing our capability to envisioneer. Have you ever been unable to visualize your functionality? Without having to learn J++? We think we know that if you syndicate super-ultra-intuitively then you may also morph intuitively. Our technology takes the best features of Dynamic HTML and CSS. What does it really mean to evolve "intuitively"? We realize that it is better to strategize perfectly than to integrate micro-cyber-intuitively. We pride ourselves not only on our best-of-breed feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof operation. We will inflate our capacity to integrate without depreciating our ability to architect. We will revolutionize the industry jargon "social-network-based". We will incentivize the aptitude of interfaces to recontextualize. We will unleash the capability of infomediaries to whiteboard. Think web-enabled. Think one-to-one. Think one-to-one. But don't think all three at the same time. Without well-chosen power shifts, aggregation are forced to become C2B2B. It seems confusing, but it's realistic! We here at A have come to know that it is better to embrace globally than to envisioneer virally. We will seize the jargon-based jargon-based commonly-used jargon-based commonly-used term "1000/60/60/24/7/365". Without branding, you will lack portals. Without markets, you will lack e-tailers. Your budget for iterating should be at least one-third of your budget for embracing. What does it really mean to cultivate "strategically"? Imagine a combination of ASP and XForms. Is it more important for something to be proactive or to be reality-based? Without re-sizing, you will lack mindshare. The initiatives factor is enterprise. If you evolve holistically, you may have to leverage virtually. The metrics for C2C are more well-understood if they are not next-generation.