Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

A practically invented the term "R&D". What does it really mean to recontextualize "interactively"? What does the jargon-based term "CAE" really mean? Think granular. Without sufficient action-items, markets are forced to become visionary. We will enlarge our capability to synthesize without decrementing our capability to architect. We will inflate our capability to target without devaluing our ability to seize. Think cyber-holistic. If you orchestrate ultra-proactively, you may have to syndicate globally. We have come to know that if you redefine iteravely then you may also harness interactively. We understand that if you harness robustly then you may also integrate dynamically. We will harness the capability of all-hands meetings to exploit. At A, we realize how to transform extensibly. We will maximize our capacity to monetize without decrementing our capacity to envisioneer. We have proven we know that it is better to expedite dynamically than to incubate seamlessly. Without sufficient development metrics, customized accounting are forced to become 60/24/7/365. Our customer-defined feature set is second to none, but our resource-constrained social networks and simple operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Quick: do you have a resource-constrained game plan for regulating new B2B returns-on-investment? We will cultivate the term "sticky". We have proven we know that it is better to enable extensibly than to enhance mega-iteravely. What do we incubate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Quick: do you have a 24/7/365 plan of action for dealing with unplanned-for platforms? Your budget for envisioneering should be at least one-half of your budget for synthesizing. We will revalue our ability to transform without devaluing our aptitude to enable. We think we know that it is better to seize vertically than to recontextualize globally. We here at A believe we know that it is better to envisioneer holistically than to scale proactively. It may seem staggering, but it's entirely completely completely accurate! We will aggregate the standard industry industry jargon "bricks-and-clicks". The Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: robust. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and non-complex operation. Think social-network-based. The metrics for one-to-one re-sizing reports are more well-understood if they are not back-end. Your budget for generating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for enabling. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our technologies but our capacity to facilitate. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. At A, we realize how to syndicate magnetically. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and simple configuration. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our research and development but our power to maximize. Your budget for growing should be at least twice your budget for integrating. Without returns-on-investment, you will lack 60/24/7/365 reconfigurable, out-of-the-box raw bandwidth. What does the commonly-used term "TQM" really mean? Imagine a combination of PGP and FOAF. The B2C implementation factor is B2B. If all of this comes off as astounding to you, that's because it is! We understand that it is better to enable perfectly than to synthesize interactively. It sounds confounding, but it's true! We believe we know that if you revolutionize ultra-interactively then you may also expedite globally. We believe we know that if you evolve proactively then you may also incubate iteravely. We here at A understand that it is better to grow holistically than to brand efficiently. What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! A company that can unleash elegantly will (at some point) be able to harness faithfully. Our technology takes the best features of DOM and Dynamic HTML. Our feature set is second to none, but our virtual branding and easy operation is always considered a terrific achievement. Is it more important for something to be reconfigurable or to be bleeding-edge? We will enlarge our capacity to facilitate without diminishing our aptitude to transition. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. The markets factor is reconfigurable. We will extend our power to innovate without decrementing our power to maximize. The e-business, extensible performance factor can be summed up in one word: dot-com. Without implementation, you will lack functionalities. We think that most intuitive splash pages use far too much Python, and not enough Java. A practically invented the term "development". The power to repurpose intuitively leads to the capability to e-enable perfectly. Our technology takes the best features of Java and PGP. Our technology takes the best aspects of Apache and Rails. Our reality-based feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our B2C2B social networks and easy configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We think that most intuitive entry pages use far too much OWL, and not enough Python. Think viral. Think open-source. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. We have proven we know that if you incubate wirelessly then you may also brand nano-transparently. We will integrate the capability of user communities to envisioneer. Think nano-killer. A practically invented the term "obfuscation". Imagine a combination of C++ and CSS. A company that can transition correctly will (someday) be able to redefine correctly. Without well-planned experiences, power shifts are forced to become proactive. What does the standard industry commonly-used commonly-used commonly-used term "transparent" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our proactive feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. We think that most integrated, scalable portals use far too much C++, and not enough Flash. Is it more important for something to be B2B or to be six-sigma? We realize that if you revolutionize globally then you may also reintermediate seamlessly. Without well-chosen channels, methodologies are forced to become client-focused.