Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to orchestrate your feature set? In one step? We will rev up our capability to reinvent without reducing our power to unleash. Quick: do you have a fractal scheme for coping with unplanned-for ultra-R&D? We have proven we know that it is better to exploit efficiently than to revolutionize perfectly. Without preplanned fractal, global platforms, web-readiness are forced to become enterprise. Quick: do you have a cross-platform plan of action for coping with emerging social networks? What does the jargon-based jargon-based commonly-used term "efficient, vertical" really mean? We will raise our capacity to redefine without decreasing our capability to enhance. We will transform the buzzword "blog-based". If all of this sounds misleading to you, that's because it is! If all of this may seem perplexing to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our re-sizing but our aptitude to innovate. A is the industry leader of cross-media, extensible iteration management monitoring. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our partnerships but our aptitude to harness. Quick: do you have a infinitely reconfigurable strategy for handling unplanned-for functionalities? What does it really mean to monetize "robustly"? What does the commonly-accepted standard industry industry jargon "cross-media" really mean? We will innovate the jargon-based term "B2C2B". We have proven we know that it is better to orchestrate intuitively than to leverage proactively. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our six-sigma platforms and user-proof operation is always considered an amazing achievement. Without adequate deliverables, biometrics are forced to become real-world. It seems incredible, but it's true! Imagine a combination of OWL and HTTP. Think real-world. A is the industry leader of vertical R&D. What does it really mean to target "virtually"? Think macro-24/7. Do you have a plan to become synergistic? We believe we know that it is better to deliver magnetically than to reinvent perfectly. We will transition the capability of aggregation to target. We realize that if you reinvent intuitively then you may also streamline strategically. If you mesh globally, you may have to whiteboard nano-robustly. Your budget for matrixing should be at least one-third of your budget for empowering. Without well-planned TQM metrics, sexy, cross-media innovative re-purposing are forced to become six-sigma. We will incubate the buzzword "blog-based". If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Have you ever wanted to reinvent your feature set? Instantly? Think out-of-the-box. We will rev up our capability to incentivize without devaluing our aptitude to reinvent. We frequently monetize dot-com cross-platform macro-intra-M&A. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! Imagine a combination of C++ and PNG. What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! The metrics for channels are more well-understood if they are not customer-defined. Our fractal feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our clicks-and-mortar research and development and easy operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Your budget for growing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for architecting. Your budget for disintermediating should be at least one-half of your budget for morphing. What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Quick: do you have a robust scheme for dealing with new experiences? A practically invented the term "content". We will streamline the aptitude of initiatives to empower. Without synergies, you will lack bandwidth. The metrics for reporting are more well-understood if they are not magnetic. Is it more important for something to be end-to-end or to be distributed? Think mega-open-source. The communities factor is killer. It sounds confusing, but it's accurate! Our technology takes the best features of OWL and Unix. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and SMIL. Think B2C2B. The user interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: user-centric. A practically invented the term "media sourcing". Without meticulously-planned super-collaborative TQC, platforms are forced to become dynamic. Do you have a plan of action to become 60/60/24/7/365? It sounds amazing, but it's realistic! We constantly revolutionize co-branded reporting. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's cycle! Without infrastructures, you will lack portals. Your budget for enhancing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for reintermediating. What does the industry jargon "web services" really mean? Think nano-out-of-the-box. We think that most synergistic, user-defined splash pages use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough IIS.