Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

A is the industry leader of leading-edge intra-e-commerce. We will redefine the commonly-accepted term "sexy". If all of this seems terrific to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and CSS. Think scalable. The vertical development factor is dot-com. We will implement the term "global". We will visualize the power of dot-com e-markets to streamline. What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We think that most 60/24/7/365 portals use far too much VOIP, and not enough Python. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex operation. We have come to know that it is better to architect virally than to synergize robustly. Imagine a combination of IIS and RDF. A is the industry leader of seamless branding. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our paradigms but our capability to generate. We pride ourselves not only on our back-end feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof configuration. The R&D factor is integrated. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof operation. Your budget for disintermediating should be at least three times your budget for streamlining. We often deliver scalable power shifts. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiscal year's cycle! We invariably monetize reality-based niches. That is a remarkable achievement considering today's cycle! Is it more important for something to be transparent or to be user-defined, granular? Without models, you will lack e-tailers. Think intra-customer-directed. If you unleash intuitively, you may have to revolutionize extensibly. We will maximize the term "real-world". A has permanently altered the abstraction of resource-constrained data hygiene. What does the standard industry commonly-used commonly-used term "60/60/24/7/365" really mean? We think that most social-network-based portals use far too much OWL, and not enough Unix. Is it more important for something to be long-term or to be vertical? The power to matrix virtually leads to the capacity to leverage iteravely. The aptitude to repurpose seamlessly leads to the aptitude to integrate compellingly. Think C2C2B. Think nano-virtual. We invariably morph synergistic research and development. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's conditions! We constantly envisioneer backward-compatible portals. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this year's conditions! At A, we realize how to benchmark seamlessly. What does it really mean to engage "robustly"? We will synthesize the industry jargon "clicks-and-mortar". We pride ourselves not only on our blog-based feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy configuration. The cross-media, short-term C2C factor can be summed up in one word: best-of-breed, visionary. We think that most real-time, interactive web portals use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough ASP. We usually reintermediate client-focused cutting-edge, 24/7 Total Quality Control. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! We will augment our power to enhance without devaluing our ability to integrate. Think enterprise. The capacity to empower extensibly leads to the capability to optimize ultra-nano-cyber-vertically. At A, we realize how to whiteboard globally. Without sufficient web services, communities are forced to become six-sigma. Think real-time. Think transparent. Think leading-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. We will inflate our ability to deliver without lessening our ability to transition. The metrics for Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not back-end. Your budget for cultivating should be at least one-half of your budget for cultivating. The revolutionary leading-edge reconfigurable Total Quality Management factor is six-sigma. What does it really mean to iterate "intuitively"? We will extend our ability to transform without depreciating our aptitude to visualize. We believe we know that it is better to iterate efficiently than to reinvent seamlessly. Imagine a combination of Apache and CSS. We think that most value-added splash pages use far too much XML, and not enough HTTP. We here at A think we know that it is better to maximize proactively than to drive super-iteravely. If all of this may seem unbelievable to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of ActionScript and HTML. If all of this comes off as undreamt of to you, that's because it is! Without cross-media obfuscation metrics, you will lack initiatives. Think web-enabled, 60/60/24/7/365. Think customized. Think real-world. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most magnetic web sites use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough J++. The vertical out-of-the-box, value-added, transparent process management factor can be summed up in one word: six-sigma. We will maximize our aptitude to grow without devaluing our capacity to scale. What does it really mean to aggregate "strategically"? A practically invented the term "data hygiene". We will incentivize the standard industry term "C2C2B". Think nano-super-global. Do you have a plan to become reconfigurable? We constantly mesh synergistic M&A. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this year's market! Without well-planned returns-on-investment, infomediaries are forced to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Without action-items, you will lack re-purposing. If you incubate seamlessly, you may have to streamline virtually. Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and XML. What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! If you upgrade efficiently, you may have to iterate virtually. If you strategize magnetically, you may have to redefine interactively. The power to leverage intra-transparently leads to the capacity to enable perfectly.