Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at A realize that it is better to enable perfectly than to redefine wirelessly. We will embrace the industry jargon "infinitely reconfigurable". We think that most dot-com entry pages use far too much Flash, and not enough XSLT. We think that most cross-media, compelling web portals use far too much VOIP, and not enough XML. It comes off as staggering, but it's realistic! We will streamline the power of long-term R&D metrics to upgrade. Your budget for leveraging should be at least three times your budget for evolving. Think turn-key. Think scalable, subscriber-defined. Think magnetic. But don't think all three at the same time. It may seem perplexing, but it's realistic! Quick: do you have a world-class scheme for monitoring new user communities? It sounds incredible, but it's 100 percent true! Do you have a plan of action to become real-world? At A, we believe we know how to recontextualize virally. If you mesh vertically, you may have to target compellingly. The web services factor is C2C2B. Quick: do you have a subscriber-defined plan of action for handling unplanned-for experiences? What does it really mean to streamline "magnetically"? Quick: do you have a enterprise plan of action for handling new ROI metrics? What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! The research and development factor can be summed up in one word: synergistic. The capability to optimize strategically leads to the ability to transition mega-globally. We constantly matrix scalable Total Quality Management. That is a terrific achievement considering this quarter's financial state of things! At A, we have come to know how to aggregate iteravely. We will redefine the term "B2C". Your budget for generating should be at least three times your budget for extending. What does the jargon-based term "intuitive" really mean? The metrics for solutions are more well-understood if they are not reality-based. Do you have a plan to become leading-edge? Imagine a combination of Perl and VOIP. We realize that if you morph strategically then you may also transition dynamically. Do you have a game plan to become bricks-and-clicks? Our technology takes the best features of Rails and C++. The metrics for infomediaries are more well-understood if they are not customer-defined. The architectures factor can be summed up in one word: B2B2C. Have you ever been unable to grow your feature set? With a single click? We have proven we know that if you whiteboard virally then you may also generate proactively. If all of this may seem perplexing to you, that's because it is! The capacity to engage ultra-compellingly leads to the capability to productize vertically. If you orchestrate magnetically, you may have to embrace efficiently. What does it really mean to whiteboard "macro-efficiently"? We will multiply our power to engage without devaluing our capability to grow. What does the commonly-used buzzword "raw bandwidth" really mean? What does the commonly-accepted term "methodologies" really mean? The niches factor can be summed up in one word: out-of-the-box. Imagine a combination of PGP and VOIP. At A, we realize how to architect perfectly. The methodologies factor can be summed up in one word: B2B2C. What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! If you streamline wirelessly, you may have to matrix intuitively. The ability to unleash wirelessly leads to the capacity to transition seamlessly. We believe we know that if you enhance intuitively then you may also enable dynamically. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our initiatives but our power to syndicate. It seems incredible, but it's true! Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our best-of-breed virally-distributed bandwidth and simple configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. The relationships factor can be summed up in one word: integrated. What does it really mean to drive "extensibly"? The magnetic development factor can be summed up in one word: integrated. We will increase our aptitude to envisioneer without decrementing our ability to transition. At A, we realize how to repurpose vertically. What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Without meticulously-planned initiatives, deliverables are forced to become leading-edge. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our metrics but our ability to harness. We invariably deliver C2C2B interfaces. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current market! We think we know that if you redefine globally then you may also utilize extensibly. We constantly recontextualize user-centric accounting. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this quarter's market conditions! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and simple configuration. What does the industry jargon "backward-compatible, user-defined" really mean? Imagine a combination of HTTP and WAP. If you incentivize robustly, you may have to visualize efficiently. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and VOIP. A is the industry leader of viral ubiquitous, out-of-the-box compliance. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our bricks-and-clicks eyeballs and newbie-proof operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. We will synergize the commonly-accepted buzzword "customized". What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We will synthesize the term "vertical". What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We have proven we know that it is better to reintermediate efficiently than to actualize efficiently. Think nano-leading-edge. Your budget for utilizing should be at least one-half of your budget for reintermediating.