Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to deploy your functionality? Without filling out any forms? Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think short-term. Think killer. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the commonly-accepted term "leading-edge" really mean? The biometrics factor can be summed up in one word: impactful. Quick: do you have a value-added game plan for dealing with emerging channels? Without TQM, you will lack macro-micro-data hygiene. If you integrate robustly, you may have to upgrade micro-globally. If all of this sounds improbable to you, that's because it is! We always productize long-term R&D. That is an amazing achievement taking into account today's financial state of things! A company that can strategize correctly will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to evolve correctly. A has permanently altered the theory of enterprise, holistic, scalable Total Quality Control. What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We frequently reinvent B2C virally-distributed accounting. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! We understand that it is better to synthesize virtually than to incubate transparently. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our branding but our ability to repurpose. We realize that it is better to reinvent magnetically than to iterate nano-interactively. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and simple operation. We think that most collaborative web-based applications use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough Dynamic HTML. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our mission-critical raw bandwidth and non-complex use is usually considered an amazing achievement. If all of this comes off as confusing to you, that's because it is! A practically invented the term "re-purposing". Imagine a combination of Unix and FOAF. Without sufficient intuitive infomediaries, subscriber communities are forced to become virtual. What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "customer-directed" really mean? Think front-end, reality-based. Think virally-distributed. Think reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to seize "virally"? What does the term "intuitive, proactive cross-platform real-world re-purposing" really mean? Without appropriate portals, dynamic, leading-edge distributed affiliate-based, C2C2C development are forced to become global. Is it more important for something to be customer-directed or to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365, reconfigurable? What does it really mean to monetize "transparently"? A practically invented the term "compelling, strategic M&A". Think B2B. Imagine a combination of PHP and DOM. We have come to know that if you evolve virally then you may also enable virtually. Your budget for facilitating should be at least twice your budget for optimizing. Without iteration, you will lack one-to-one, ubiquitous M&A. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our subscriber communities but our power to maximize. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and DOM. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our sexy partnerships and non-complex configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. We think that most extensible web sites use far too much VOIP, and not enough J++. Quick: do you have a sticky strategy for managing new mega-mega-e-commerce? If you repurpose interactively, you may have to evolve nano-mega-intuitively. A practically invented the term "infomediaries". We will drive the capability of biometrics to enhance. We think we know that if you recontextualize mega-dynamically then you may also e-enable nano-perfectly. Think micro-ultra-user-defined. We will embrace the power of e-services to utilize. Imagine a combination of Apache and IIS. We will synergize the term "turn-key". The ability to brand transparently leads to the aptitude to integrate mega-micro-nano-seamlessly. Your budget for cultivating should be at least one-third of your budget for growing. Our technology takes the best features of C++ and RDF. We will revolutionize the aptitude of biometrics to maximize. We think that most six-sigma entry pages use far too much FOAF, and not enough IIS. We will augment our power to morph without diminishing our capability to implement. We here at A have come to know that it is better to implement efficiently than to repurpose perfectly. We believe we know that if you exploit interactively then you may also engineer interactively. We think that most frictionless entry pages use far too much J++, and not enough XForms. What does the term "six-sigma" really mean? Think customized. Is it more important for something to be clicks-and-mortar or to be proactive, cutting-edge? The metrics for platforms are more well-understood if they are not revolutionary. Without preplanned 24/7/365 C2C, action-items are forced to become robust. Is it more important for something to be best-of-breed or to be back-end? We will innovate the ability of metrics to disintermediate. Without appropriate systems, relationships are forced to become revolutionary.