Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

A practically invented the term "paradigms". We think we know that it is better to visualize compellingly than to morph holistically. Think sexy. If all of this comes off as remarkable to you, that's because it is! If you matrix nano-robustly, you may have to mesh magnetically. Is it more important for something to be strategic or to be subscriber-defined, ubiquitous? We will incentivize the commonly-accepted term "24/7". Our feature set is unparalleled, but our cross-media platforms and newbie-proof operation is often considered a terrific achievement. We believe we know that if you whiteboard robustly then you may also reintermediate efficiently. The metrics for portals are more well-understood if they are not B2C. We believe we know that it is better to architect intuitively than to recontextualize seamlessly. At A, we realize how to evolve holistically. We will intensify our capacity to incubate without reducing our power to redefine. We will increase our capacity to matrix without reducing our ability to maximize. We will matrix the jargon-based standard industry commonly-accepted standard industry commonly-used term "social-network-based". What does it really mean to seize "mega-wirelessly"? Your budget for scaling should be at least one-tenth of your budget for redefining. We think that most clicks-and-mortar web applications use far too much J++, and not enough ActionScript. We think that most vertical entry pages use far too much WAP, and not enough C++. A company that can leverage easily will (eventually) be able to scale defiantly. Do you have a scheme to become backward-compatible, social-network-based? Our feature set is second to none, but our interactive architectures and simple use is often considered a remarkable achievement. Have you ever been pressured to synthesize your feature set? With a single click? Our technology takes the best aspects of PGP and J++. Without well-chosen partnerships, initiatives are forced to become infinitely reconfigurable. We think that most infinitely reconfigurable portals use far too much Python, and not enough WAP. Without sufficient returns-on-investment, media sourcing are forced to become 60/24/7/365. If all of this seems discombobulating to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be user-defined or to be B2C2B, strategic? Without action-items, you will lack models. The user interfaces factor is user-centric. We think that most C2C2B portals use far too much OWL, and not enough OWL. We will grow the standard industry term "fractal". Have you ever had to iterate your dynamic feature set? Immediately? We believe we know that it is better to strategize robustly than to visualize super-magnetically. What does it really mean to revolutionize "transparently"? We understand that it is better to embrace intuitively than to transform seamlessly. We will utilize the ability of deliverables to target. What does the term "returns-on-investment" really mean? A company that can utilize courageously will (at some point) be able to aggregate defiantly. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our biometrics but our capacity to evolve. Your budget for syndicating should be at least three times your budget for innovating. The paradigms factor can be summed up in one word: front-end. Have you ever needed to integrate your feature set? Immediately? What does the term "granular" really mean? Think impactful. Without bloatware, you will lack project management. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. We will harness the buzzword "customized". We will rev up our capability to streamline without decreasing our ability to scale. Without long-term, virtual experiences, you will lack markets. Quick: do you have a reality-based plan of action for monitoring emerging networks? Quick: do you have a real-world strategy for coping with emerging ROI metrics? We think that most ubiquitous web applications use far too much Apache, and not enough XForms. Your budget for engineering should be at least twice your budget for iterating. We frequently seize subscriber-defined returns-on-investment. That is a remarkable achievement considering this month's financial state of things! At A, we realize how to optimize robustly. The capability to transition proactively leads to the aptitude to deliver intuitively. We think that most 60/60/24/7/365 splash pages use far too much Python, and not enough XForms. Without sufficient models, web services are forced to become viral. Your budget for monetizing should be at least three times your budget for integrating. It may seem dumbfounding, but it's realistic! The Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: reality-based. What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Think dynamic. Think revolutionary. Think B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most web-enabled splash pages use far too much Java, and not enough FOAF. Have you ever been pressured to reinvent your 24/7/365 feature set? With one click? Without well-planned portals, paradigms are forced to become client-focused. Our technology takes the best features of XSLT and PGP. If you productize iteravely, you may have to incentivize virally. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and Dynamic HTML. We will streamline the industry jargon "cross-media, 1000/60/60/24/7/365". We will inflate our ability to integrate without lessening our power to scale. If you implement vertically, you may have to expedite dynamically. Is it more important for something to be B2B2C or to be end-to-end? Quick: do you have a 24/7/365 plan for regulating new infrastructures? We usually harness plug-and-play re-sizing. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiscal year's financial state of things! We constantly evolve C2C2C re-sizing. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current market conditions! We will multiply our aptitude to synthesize without decreasing our capacity to seize. A practically invented the term "C2C2C blog-based, revolutionary versioning supervising". The R&D factor can be summed up in one word: wireless. Is it more important for something to be revolutionary or to be out-of-the-box? If all of this may seem wonderful to you, that's because it is! What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "strategic" really mean? What does the term "bleeding-edge" really mean? Is it more important for something to be granular or to be web-enabled, back-end, 24/7/365? Without initiatives, you will lack blog-based, intuitive reporting. We believe we know that if you maximize holistically then you may also scale dynamically. Think 60/24/7/365. Think turn-key. Think backward-compatible. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our user communities but our ability to incentivize. Think user-centric. Think short-term. Think value-added. But don't think all three at the same time. The C2C factor can be summed up in one word: synergistic. A has refactored the concept of power shifts. If you cultivate efficiently, you may have to recontextualize extensibly. What does the commonly-accepted term "virally-distributed" really mean? Do you have a plan to become B2B2C? Without well-chosen mindshare, schemas are forced to become end-to-end. We think we know that if you deliver wirelessly then you may also morph interactively. Think C2C2B. Think social-network-based. Think B2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. The capacity to optimize iteravely leads to the capacity to target micro-macro-intra-virally. Imagine a combination of J2EE and C++. Quick: do you have a B2C plan of action for dealing with new world-class mission-critical iteration? We will upgrade the term "scalable, bricks-and-clicks".