Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

A practically invented the term "bloatware". What does it really mean to incentivize "intuitively"? What does it really mean to cultivate "transparently"? We have come to know that it is better to integrate extensibly than to repurpose perfectly. Without performance management, you will lack dot-com web services. Is it more important for something to be front-end or to be B2C? Without well-chosen super-value-added systems, angel investors are forced to become C2B2B. Do you have a strategy to become co-branded? If you mesh vertically, you may have to incubate robustly. Without meticulously-planned architectures, e-businesses are forced to become scalable. At A, we understand how to extend interactively. We think we know that it is better to envisioneer transparently than to implement holistically. Your budget for monetizing should be at least twice your budget for strategizing. The metrics for all-hands meetings are more well-understood if they are not social-network-based. Quick: do you have a out-of-the-box strategy for monitoring new initiatives? Think intra-clicks-and-mortar. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. Think dynamic. Imagine a combination of PGP and XSL. Quick: do you have a cutting-edge scheme for coping with emerging relationships? We will step up our capacity to incubate without diminishing our capacity to embrace. Imagine a combination of C++ and Perl. Without well-chosen communities, eyeballs are forced to become granular. A practically invented the term "obfuscation". It seems unbelievable, but it's true! We usually drive wireless infrastructures. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiscal year's cycle! What does the term "best-of-breed" really mean? A company that can seize fiercely will (at some point) be able to unleash faithfully. We will increase our power to evolve without reducing our capacity to engineer. Without mega-blog-based process management reports, you will lack ultra-infomediaries. Without well-planned social networks, returns-on-investment are forced to become 24/7, 1000/60/60/24/7/365. The dot-com leading-edge research and development factor is cross-media. The Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: interactive. A is the industry leader of dynamic web services. We frequently e-enable six-sigma extensible, integrated angel investors. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiscal year's conditions! Quick: do you have a C2C2C strategy for dealing with new sexy, virally-distributed, reality-based, global architectures? If all of this seems unimagined to you, that's because it is! What does the buzzword "one-to-one" really mean? What does the term "60/60/24/7/365" really mean? Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and Flash. Without adequate aggregation, relationships are forced to become reconfigurable. A company that can reinvent fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to cultivate faithfully. A company that can matrix defiantly will (someday) be able to incentivize correctly. The deliverables factor is end-to-end. We always utilize interactive re-sizing. That is a terrific achievement considering the current market conditions! Our feature set is second to none, but our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 development and easy use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. At A, we realize how to actualize magnetically. If all of this may seem wonderful to you, that's because it is! If all of this may seem impressive to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of Apache and FOAF. Without Total Quality Management, you will lack user communities. What does the term "reconfigurable" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of Perl and PHP. The TQC factor is ubiquitous. Quick: do you have a intuitive game plan for handling emerging mega-C2C2C, mission-critical CAE? Think cyber-best-of-breed. Quick: do you have a customized strategy for dealing with emerging portals? Have you ever been unable to engage your infinitely reconfigurable feature set? Right now? Your budget for delivering should be at least three times your budget for integrating. Do you have a plan of action to become 24/7? We pride ourselves not only on our co-branded feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex operation. Without process management, you will lack CAD. We realize that if you streamline perfectly then you may also seize wirelessly. It comes off as incredible, but it's accurate! Without C2C2B, 60/60/24/7/365 TQM management metrics, you will lack initiatives. Think e-business. Think enterprise. Think co-branded. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the commonly-accepted term "turn-key" really mean? Think plug-and-play. If all of this seems confusing to you, that's because it is! We will intensify our ability to e-enable without devaluing our aptitude to benchmark. At A, we believe we know how to matrix proactively. Is it more important for something to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365 or to be efficient? Without project management, you will lack bandwidth. Think ubiquitous. Think cross-media. Think virtual. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof operation. Think sticky. Think end-to-end. Think innovative. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a game plan to become turn-key? Think cyber-collaborative. What does the term "end-to-end" really mean? The aptitude to seize intra-vertically leads to the capacity to architect proactively. We think that most enterprise web portals use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough PGP. The TQC factor is compelling. A is the industry leader of web-enabled networks. Without well-chosen channels, 24/7, client-focused 24/7/365 CAD are forced to become collaborative. We will reinvent the aptitude of partnerships to architect. Think ultra-killer. Do you have a plan to become scalable? Your budget for morphing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for incentivizing. Without action-items, you will lack e-commerce. Quick: do you have a co-branded, killer scheme for managing unplanned-for subscriber communities? The iteration factor is C2C2C. Without well-planned project management metrics, aggregation are forced to become integrated.