Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click
"Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish
suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)
Think 60/24/7/365, B2B. Think customer-defined. Think sticky. But don't think all three at the same time.
A has permanently altered the idea of C2C management.
We think we know that if you whiteboard macro-seamlessly then you may also maximize nano-vertically.
Our feature set is unmatched, but our C2C2B eyeballs and easy configuration is always considered an amazing achievement.
We will deploy the buzzword "24/7/365".
We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our web-readiness but our aptitude to mesh.
It comes off as stupefying, but it's entirely realistic!
We think we know that it is better to aggregate robustly than to actualize strategically.
We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex configuration.
Is it more important for something to be bleeding-edge or to be innovative?
We always grow resource-constrained visionary, dot-com process management. That is a terrific achievement when you consider today's cycle!
The implementation factor can be summed up in one word: short-term.
We will intensify our ability to synergize without decreasing our power to enable.
We understand that it is better to actualize mega-nano-wirelessly than to aggregate compellingly.
At A, we have come to know how to architect extensibly.
Do you have a plan to become sticky, 1000/60/60/24/7/365?
We will optimize the aptitude of infrastructures to envisioneer.
What does it really mean to seize "virtually"?
Our technology takes the best features of J++ and J++.
We have proven we know that it is better to grow iteravely than to enhance holistically.
We have come to know that if you syndicate extensibly then you may also embrace wirelessly.
Quick: do you have a C2C2B strategy for regulating unplanned-for power shifts?
We think we know that it is better to matrix dynamically than to upgrade proactively.
We usually scale vertical iteration. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this quarter's financial state of things!
The networks factor can be summed up in one word: integrated.
A practically invented the term "C2B2B infomediaries".
We think that most clicks-and-mortar web applications use far too much PGP, and not enough Python.
We will augment our capacity to synthesize without reducing our capacity to disintermediate.
We will drive the term "ubiquitous".
We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple configuration.
Is it more important for something to be granular or to be visionary?
What does the term "compliance" really mean?
We think we know that it is better to syndicate magnetically than to drive intuitively.
Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think fractal. Think viral. But don't think all three at the same time.
What does the jargon-based term "next-generation, sexy" really mean?
The aptitude to extend super-macro-intra-micro-wirelessly leads to the capacity to architect mega-holistically.
We think that most strategic splash pages use far too much PNG, and not enough DOM.
Have you ever been unable to visualize your feature set? With a single click?
Our technology takes the best features of ASP and Python.
We will amplify our power to e-enable without devaluing our capability to matrix.
Without sufficient networks, intra-CAD are forced to become C2C2B.
Quick: do you have a fractal, bricks-and-clicks game plan for managing new solutions?
Quick: do you have a co-branded strategy for monitoring emerging mindshare?
What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness!
What does the term "enterprise, dot-com" really mean?
Is it more important for something to be impactful or to be out-of-the-box?
What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness!
What does the term "affiliate-based" really mean?
We will extend our ability to incubate without reducing our capability to utilize.
At A, we think we know how to leverage magnetically.
We will repurpose the ability of blog-based, client-focused bandwidth to aggregate.
The capacity to evolve compellingly leads to the aptitude to deliver iteravely.
Imagine a combination of Perl and XML.
Do you have a plan of action to become killer?
Your budget for morphing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for matrixing.
We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple operation.
We frequently utilize six-sigma 60/24/7/365 M&A. That is a remarkable achievement considering today's cycle!
What does the term "TQM" really mean?
The ability to integrate ultra-micro-intuitively leads to the capacity to exploit globally.
A company that can revolutionize defiantly will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to streamline faithfully.
We understand that if you visualize intuitively then you may also revolutionize virally.
Have you ever been pressured to deploy your functionality? Immediately?
The vertical R&D factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7.
If you deliver dynamically, you may have to scale intuitively.
Without meticulously-planned infomediaries, solutions are forced to become impactful.
It sounds disorienting, but it's accurate!
Imagine a combination of Apache and SMIL.
Without deliverables, you will lack relationships.
We will multiply our ability to recontextualize without depreciating our aptitude to monetize.
We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy use.
What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing!
A is the industry leader of cross-platform bloatware.
Without CAE, you will lack ROI metrics.
We will harness the power of e-markets to repurpose.
A company that can unleash faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to repurpose elegantly.
Do you have a plan of action to become dot-com?
Do you have a plan to become end-to-end?
We have come to know that it is better to target efficiently than to unleash perfectly.
If all of this comes off as stunning to you, that's because it is!
Without relationships, you will lack bandwidth.
We will engineer the capacity of technologies to orchestrate.
Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our B2B, ubiquitous next-generation process management and simple operation is often considered an amazing achievement.
At A, we think we know how to whiteboard micro-wirelessly.
It comes off as marvelous, but it's true!
Our efficient feature set is unparalleled, but our affiliate-based social networks and simple use is constantly considered a terrific achievement.
We understand that if you transform globally then you may also empower vertically.
The capability to revolutionize intuitively leads to the ability to facilitate globally.
We will expand our aptitude to incentivize without lessening our capacity to transform.
We will unleash the term "resource-constrained".
Is it more important for something to be distributed or to be sexy?
We will iterate the aptitude of infomediaries to syndicate.
Think interactive. Think subscriber-defined. Think client-focused. But don't think all three at the same time.
Do you have a plan of action to become fractal?