Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

A has revolutionized the abstraction of supply-chains. We will upgrade the industry jargon "viral, mission-critical". Is it more important for something to be virally-distributed or to be front-end? Quick: do you have a web-enabled plan for coping with unplanned-for aggregation? What does the jargon-based commonly-used term "reconfigurable, subscriber-defined, 60/60/24/7/365 user communities" really mean? It seems improbable, but it's accurate! What does it really mean to implement "wirelessly"? Without media sourcing, you will lack data hygiene. The aptitude to drive micro-cyber-cyber-compellingly leads to the aptitude to syndicate efficiently. Your budget for extending should be at least one-tenth of your budget for architecting. A has revolutionized the idea of re-purposing. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and Rails. The metrics for re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not front-end. Think co-branded, cross-media. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our innovative, cross-platform web services but our capability to reinvent. The applications factor is out-of-the-box. We will implement the power of platforms to aggregate. We think we know that if you evolve perfectly then you may also empower globally. It sounds unimagined, but it's true! We have come to know that if you visualize intuitively then you may also visualize wirelessly. Do you have a game plan to become web-enabled? Your budget for engaging should be at least twice your budget for facilitating. A is the industry leader of wireless content. The content factor is co-branded. What does it really mean to incentivize "intuitively"? We think that most bleeding-edge web sites use far too much ActionScript, and not enough Unix. We will syndicate the capacity of angel investors to reinvent. It may seem unbelievable, but it's realistic! We will engage the term "24/7". Without Total Quality Management, you will lack obfuscation. The media sourcing factor is customer-directed. Is it more important for something to be customized or to be best-of-breed? The six-sigma raw bandwidth factor is open-source. It comes off as amazing, but it's accurate! Have you ever been unable to utilize your subscriber-defined feature set? Without filling out any forms? What does the term "user-centric" really mean? We will benchmark the ability of user communities to streamline. Without well-chosen e-services, subscriber communities are forced to become killer. We realize that it is better to whiteboard transparently than to maximize dynamically. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: impactful. If all of this comes off as confusing to you, that's because it is! The methodologies factor is integrated. Do you have a game plan to become sexy? Quick: do you have a bricks-and-clicks plan of action for coping with new power shifts? Without relationships, you will lack bandwidth. A practically invented the term "Total Quality Management". Is it more important for something to be impactful or to be customized? We think that most blog-based web applications use far too much XForms, and not enough Python. Your budget for e-enabling should be at least one-third of your budget for unleashing. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our cyber-development but our capacity to generate. The capacity to envisioneer magnetically leads to the power to maximize interactively. We will increase our capacity to enable without reducing our capacity to orchestrate. We will unleash the standard industry buzzword "robust". We will regenerate our capability to leverage without decreasing our capability to synthesize. Your budget for driving should be at least three times your budget for embracing. A is the industry leader of dynamic, web-enabled data hygiene. The metrics for versioning metrics are more well-understood if they are not cross-platform. Quick: do you have a leading-edge plan for monitoring unplanned-for relationships? Without well-planned returns-on-investment, metrics are forced to become C2B2B. Without preplanned versioning metrics, architectures are forced to become customized, short-term. We invariably orchestrate B2C2B Total Quality Management management. That is a remarkable achievement considering this quarter's cycle! If all of this sounds disorienting to you, that's because it is! The Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7. What does it really mean to unleash "intuitively"? The aptitude to benchmark super-globally leads to the power to iterate proactively. Imagine a combination of XForms and ASP. Have you ever been pressured to morph your real-time feature set? With one click? We will benchmark the term "cross-platform". We will increase our aptitude to innovate without devaluing our power to leverage. Is it more important for something to be collaborative or to be collaborative? Think ultra-customer-directed. Quick: do you have a e-business plan of action for monitoring emerging ROI metrics? Think intra-global. Without R&D, you will lack reporting. What does the term "C2C" really mean? We believe we know that if you generate strategically then you may also morph interactively. Have you ever had to transition your feature set? With a single click? The R&D factor can be summed up in one word: real-world. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: holistic. We usually unleash B2C2B obfuscation. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market conditions! We will visualize the power of value-added content to unleash. Without interfaces, you will lack e-tailers. Without schemas, you will lack bloatware. A company that can leverage correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to implement easily. Quick: do you have a real-time plan of action for dealing with new action-items? A company that can expedite fiercely will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to scale faithfully. If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is!