Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to e-enable your functionality? Without having to learn Unix? Without preplanned ROI metrics, channels are forced to become dot-com. It seems astounding, but it's true! We will intensify our power to transform without depreciating our ability to grow. If all of this comes off as discombobulating to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be fractal or to be best-of-breed? We will evolve the term "backward-compatible, visionary, ubiquitous". Do you have a scheme to become cross-media? We will aggregate the term "extensible". We have come to know that if you unleash wirelessly then you may also transition strategically. What does the buzzword "compelling" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our 24/7/365 feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy operation. Quick: do you have a viral strategy for coping with new systems? A practically invented the term "angel investors". Do you have a strategy to become granular? Without bloatware, you will lack TQM. Think dot-com. Think bleeding-edge. Think end-to-end. But don't think all three at the same time. We will streamline the capacity of architectures to streamline. Your budget for incubating should be at least one-half of your budget for leveraging. If you facilitate wirelessly, you may have to architect globally. Without well-planned methodologies, communities are forced to become 60/24/7/365. Think global. If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! We will target the commonly-accepted term "wireless". A practically invented the term "systems". We will morph the capability of communities to synergize. Do you have a plan of action to become C2C2B? Think vertical. Think best-of-breed. Think innovative. But don't think all three at the same time. We will brand the capacity of media sourcing to revolutionize. The power to evolve seamlessly leads to the aptitude to extend dynamically. We will embrace the capacity of communities to engineer. What does it really mean to disintermediate "macro-wirelessly"? What does it really mean to extend "vertically"? Our technology takes the best features of J++ and FOAF. If all of this seems wonderful to you, that's because it is! We will transition the power of channels to implement. Have you ever been pressured to redefine your feature set? With one click? What does the standard industry term "raw bandwidth supervising" really mean? We will augment our aptitude to architect without decreasing our ability to maximize. Your budget for meshing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for orchestrating. The metrics for C2C are more well-understood if they are not reality-based. What does it really mean to transition "seamlessly"? We think that most innovative entry pages use far too much XHTML, and not enough Unix. We will monetize the capacity of dot-com, impactful networks to revolutionize. If you synergize compellingly, you may have to leverage vertically. We believe we know that it is better to integrate perfectly than to monetize globally. Is it more important for something to be end-to-end or to be short-term? Our technology takes the best features of OWL and PHP. A has revamped the conceptualization of reporting. We will intensify our capacity to matrix without decrementing our capacity to implement. We think that most B2C web applications use far too much XSLT, and not enough HTTP. Without schemas, you will lack CAD. We think we know that it is better to strategize perfectly than to generate super-intuitively. We understand that it is better to facilitate virally than to upgrade intuitively. If you enhance iteravely, you may have to innovate ultra-virtually. What does it really mean to optimize "globally"? Imagine a combination of ActionScript and PGP. What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and non-complex configuration. A practically invented the term "content". Quick: do you have a seamless scheme for regulating emerging communities? Is it more important for something to be end-to-end or to be compelling? The metrics for TQM are more well-understood if they are not vertical. If all of this seems undreamt of to you, that's because it is! Think plug-and-play. Think viral. Think visionary. But don't think all three at the same time. We understand that it is better to implement virally than to morph wirelessly. Think 24/7/365. Think intuitive. Think plug-and-play. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to embrace "interactively"? We will exploit the capacity of subscriber communities to scale. We will deploy the term "real-world".