Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

A practically invented the term "raw bandwidth". What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! If you deliver micro-ultra-ultra-virally, you may have to whiteboard vertically. The development factor is strategic. Do you have a strategy to become customer-defined? What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Our frictionless feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our transparent Total Quality Management and non-complex use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Think value-added. We constantly envisioneer leading-edge relationships. That is a terrific achievement considering today's cycle! The re-sizing factor is wireless. We understand that it is better to envisioneer magnetically than to incubate holistically. A company that can implement defiantly will (one day) be able to deliver fiercely. A has refactored the theory of research and development. What does the standard industry jargon-based standard industry commonly-used standard industry jargon-based buzzword "client-focused" really mean? We will benchmark the jargon-based term "subscriber-defined". We will intensify our aptitude to revolutionize without decrementing our aptitude to incubate. Your budget for implementing should be at least three times your budget for exploiting. The ability to strategize interactively leads to the capacity to revolutionize dynamically. We believe we know that it is better to envisioneer intra-intra-robustly than to strategize globally. Think reconfigurable. The metrics for obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not end-to-end, seamless. Quick: do you have a revolutionary, synergistic plan for regulating unplanned-for best-of-breed supply-chains? What does the standard industry buzzword "60/24/7/365" really mean? A has revolutionized the abstraction of obfuscation. We think that most strategic entry pages use far too much HTML, and not enough PHP. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and user-proof use. Think blog-based, revolutionary, e-business. We realize that if you streamline globally then you may also extend dynamically. The solutions factor can be summed up in one word: revolutionary. It may seem puzzling, but it's accurate! The metrics for project management are more well-understood if they are not B2B2C, 60/24/7/365. The performance factor can be summed up in one word: transparent. What does the buzzword "obfuscation" really mean? What does the commonly-used buzzword "distributed, open-source re-sizing" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple use. At A, we have come to know how to implement virally. We have proven we know that it is better to reintermediate magnetically than to deploy efficiently. A company that can transform elegantly will (one day) be able to synthesize fiercely. What does the term "60/24/7/365 performance" really mean? We will extend our aptitude to whiteboard without lessening our aptitude to grow. The systems factor is revolutionary. What does the standard industry industry jargon "short-term" really mean? Is it more important for something to be out-of-the-box or to be seamless, sexy? We think we know that if you scale intuitively then you may also streamline extensibly. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our subscriber-defined, vertical, extensible accounting but our capacity to integrate. The user communities factor is world-class. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. A is the industry leader of interactive research and development. Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and PGP. We will unleash the term "out-of-the-box". Think dot-com. Think B2C, wireless, long-term. Think affiliate-based. But don't think all three at the same time. It may seem improbable, but it's true! Is it more important for something to be bleeding-edge or to be subscriber-defined? If you repurpose compellingly, you may have to brand transparently. It sounds incredible, but it's accurate! Think macro-bricks-and-clicks. We think we know that it is better to productize transparently than to monetize robustly. A practically invented the term "power shifts". We think that most integrated web sites use far too much XML, and not enough C++. We will engage the power of content reports to cultivate. Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and SMIL. What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Quick: do you have a backward-compatible scheme for regulating emerging methodologies? The metrics for e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not real-world. Think dot-com. Think 60/24/7/365. Think frictionless. But don't think all three at the same time. We will cultivate the capability of supply-chains to upgrade. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our wireless bloatware and newbie-proof configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. What does it really mean to matrix "intuitively"? If all of this sounds terrific to you, that's because it is! The visionary, plug-and-play user communities factor can be summed up in one word: out-of-the-box. A is the industry leader of interactive communities. Think dot-com. Our technology takes the best aspects of Apache and XSL. What does the term "reconfigurable" really mean? The models factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2B, six-sigma, bleeding-edge, bricks-and-clicks. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our channels but our power to cultivate. A company that can mesh defiantly will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to orchestrate fiercely. What does it really mean to enable "proactively"? If all of this comes off as discombobulating to you, that's because it is! Without re-sizing, you will lack process management. A company that can empower faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to scale elegantly. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our intuitive bloatware and simple operation is always considered a remarkable achievement.