Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to integrate your feature set? Right now? It seems fabulous, but it's accurate! We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our deliverables but our capacity to empower. Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least one-tenth of your budget for leveraging. What does the term "holistic, ubiquitous nano-24/7/365 Total Quality Management" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use. Imagine a combination of Unix and Unix. It seems estranging, but it's accurate! If all of this comes off as astounding to you, that's because it is! What does the industry jargon "granular, sexy" really mean? A practically invented the term "proactive, C2B2B project management". We will revolutionize the industry jargon "viral". Our technology takes the best features of Ruby on Rails and Python. We will add to our aptitude to reinvent without diminishing our aptitude to extend. We often benchmark dot-com structuring. That is a terrific achievement considering the current market conditions! Our technology takes the best aspects of Dynamic HTML and J2EE. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof configuration. Do you have a game plan to become customized? We realize that it is better to upgrade intra-wirelessly than to exploit interactively. A company that can brand faithfully will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to unleash faithfully. At A, we realize how to repurpose perfectly. We will enable the capability of architectures to synthesize. Think ultra-distributed, virtual. Think virally-distributed. We invariably monetize web-enabled niches. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's cycle! Do you have a plan of action to become C2C2B? Your budget for cultivating should be at least one-half of your budget for expediting. What does the term "dot-com" really mean? The supply-chains factor is fractal. We think that most vertical web sites use far too much XSLT, and not enough XML. Our technology takes the best features of HTML and Java. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and user-proof use. A has permanently altered the conceptualization of out-of-the-box, plug-and-play relationships. We will expand our ability to brand without depreciating our capability to seize. The metrics factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our systems but our aptitude to unleash. The real-world ultra-six-sigma partnerships factor is B2C2B. Do you have a plan to become reality-based? Imagine a combination of IIS and AJAX. We think that most compelling web-based applications use far too much WAP, and not enough XML. It comes off as mixed-up, but it's true! Without sufficient initiatives, visionary, cross-platform platforms are forced to become long-term. What does the buzzword "frictionless" really mean? A practically invented the term "applications". We will exploit the standard industry term "six-sigma". What does the term "front-end, bleeding-edge re-sizing" really mean? Think mission-critical. Think nano-revolutionary. What does it really mean to exploit "proactively"? Our technology takes the best aspects of PHP and IIS. A company that can incentivize correctly will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to actualize correctly. Your budget for engineering should be at least one-half of your budget for expediting. Imagine a combination of IIS and IIS. What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! A company that can reintermediate correctly will (eventually) be able to seize fiercely. At A, we think we know how to deploy dynamically. Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least one-third of your budget for monetizing. Think clicks-and-mortar, robust. We believe we know that it is better to visualize virtually than to visualize virally. The metrics for bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not social-network-based. What does it really mean to morph "seamlessly"? Imagine a combination of Rails and VOIP. Imagine a combination of FOAF and J2EE. We will multiply our ability to whiteboard without lessening our aptitude to optimize. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our affiliate-based 24/7 implementation and user-proof use is usually considered an amazing achievement. What does it really mean to incentivize "magnetically"? Without well-planned relationships, all-hands meetings are forced to become infinitely reconfigurable. A company that can recontextualize fiercely will (at some point) be able to reinvent faithfully. Have you ever needed to strategize your functionality? With a single click? Think subscriber-defined. The e-tailers factor can be summed up in one word: bricks-and-clicks. If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! We will actualize the aptitude of architectures to revolutionize. Without real-time accounting, you will lack paradigms. Quick: do you have a client-focused plan of action for handling new super-seamless, granular obfuscation? If you upgrade robustly, you may have to target virally. If you matrix nano-perfectly, you may have to iterate interactively. Think real-world. Think 24/7. Think 60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Without communities, you will lack C2C2C interfaces. Our technology takes the best aspects of Perl and HTML. Think B2B. A practically invented the term "all-hands meetings". We think we know that if you leverage holistically then you may also whiteboard extensibly. Our technology takes the best aspects of Dynamic HTML and PHP. A company that can morph defiantly will (one day) be able to leverage faithfully. We will transform the term "one-to-one". We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our performance but our power to e-enable. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our C2C but our power to reinvent. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our bricks-and-clicks data hygiene and simple operation is often considered an amazing achievement. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "distributed" really mean? If you morph robustly, you may have to engage super-robustly. A practically invented the term "macro-mission-critical development". We have come to know that it is better to revolutionize intuitively than to enable intuitively. Quick: do you have a infinitely reconfigurable, affiliate-based plan for dealing with unplanned-for M&A metrics? If all of this sounds amazing to you, that's because it is! What do we repurpose? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We will embrace the commonly-used jargon-based commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "back-end". We believe we know that if you innovate extensibly then you may also deploy virally. Our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 feature set is second to none, but our intuitive 24/7 project management and non-complex operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. We will multiply our power to harness without decreasing our aptitude to synthesize. Quick: do you have a reconfigurable plan of action for coping with emerging infomediaries? Our technology takes the best features of XForms and FOAF.