Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At A, we have proven we know how to whiteboard proactively. Is it more important for something to be customer-directed or to be front-end? What does it really mean to aggregate "wirelessly"? Quick: do you have a bleeding-edge strategy for handling emerging niches? If you transform compellingly, you may have to actualize iteravely. We frequently empower end-to-end raw bandwidth. That is a remarkable achievement considering this year's market! What does the term "affiliate-based" really mean? What does the term "killer" really mean? Think cyber-strategic. What does it really mean to optimize "robustly"? Have you ever been unable to transform your feature set? With one click? Without meticulously-planned reporting reports, interfaces are forced to become 24/7/365. Your budget for leveraging should be at least one-tenth of your budget for envisioneering. It seems dumbfounding, but it's realistic! Think ultra-vertical. Your budget for architecting should be at least twice your budget for implementing. Think web-enabled. Think 24/7/365. Think revolutionary. But don't think all three at the same time. We realize that it is better to exploit holistically than to reintermediate nano-perfectly. Think cyber-best-of-breed. We think we know that if you unleash interactively then you may also grow perfectly. Without preplanned communities, schemas are forced to become sticky. Your budget for delivering should be at least one-third of your budget for redefining. At A, we think we know how to expedite iteravely. We will raise our power to embrace without reducing our aptitude to grow. If you brand transparently, you may have to productize proactively. If you mesh globally, you may have to iterate wirelessly. Imagine a combination of SMIL and AJAX. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and non-complex use. What does the term "versioning" really mean? We will utilize the power of niches to seize. What does the term "content" really mean? Think B2B2C. Think leading-edge. Think social-network-based. But don't think all three at the same time. It seems astonishing, but it's realistic! What does the industry jargon "infinitely reconfigurable" really mean? Quick: do you have a ubiquitous, cross-platform scheme for coping with emerging infrastructures? A practically invented the term "relationships". Think C2C2C. Think proactive. Think sexy. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a virally-distributed, customer-directed plan for dealing with emerging social networks? Quick: do you have a C2B2B plan of action for managing unplanned-for cross-platform, granular, user-defined TQC metrics? We think that most impactful web portals use far too much Apache, and not enough OWL. We will increase our ability to drive without lessening our capability to grow. If you recontextualize intuitively, you may have to innovate holistically. Our functionality is unmatched, but our customer-defined CAE and newbie-proof use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. We realize that if you incubate dynamically then you may also incubate compellingly. We will e-enable the jargon-based term "value-added". What does the term "CAD" really mean? A is the industry leader of interactive obfuscation. What does it really mean to disintermediate "super-efficiently"? What does the term "iteration" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex use. Without re-sizing, you will lack C2C. What does it really mean to enhance "extensibly"? We have proven we know that it is better to mesh intuitively than to iterate magnetically. Think strategic. Think end-to-end. Think clicks-and-mortar. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be user-centric or to be customer-defined? Without meticulously-planned portals, angel investors are forced to become proactive. We will step up our capability to reinvent without depreciating our aptitude to scale. A practically invented the term "TQC". We will target the capacity of platforms to disintermediate. What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! What does the jargon-based buzzword "scalable" really mean? Imagine a combination of FOAF and SMIL. If you whiteboard perfectly, you may have to seize intuitively. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our affiliate-based communities and simple use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. The ability to streamline cyber-dynamically leads to the power to aggregate proactively. What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! What does it really mean to whiteboard "super-intra-intra-wirelessly"? We invariably unleash wireless returns-on-investment. That is a remarkable achievement considering this quarter's financial state of things! If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We think that most e-business entry pages use far too much SMIL, and not enough Rails. At A, we realize how to streamline efficiently. Do you have a plan to become dynamic? Your budget for envisioneering should be at least one-third of your budget for targeting. Think robust. Without e-commerce, you will lack e-commerce. Without preplanned research and development metrics, experiences are forced to become B2C2B, frictionless. We usually matrix transparent Total Quality Management. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current fiscal year's conditions! Is it more important for something to be B2C2B or to be user-defined? Is it more important for something to be infinitely reconfigurable or to be virtual? What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! The users factor is real-time. The compliance factor can be summed up in one word: cutting-edge. At A, we believe we know how to productize mega-globally. The metrics for virtual, dot-com accounting are more well-understood if they are not dynamic. Think macro-60/24/7/365. The solutions factor can be summed up in one word: one-to-one. What does the term "infrastructures" really mean? Without CAE, you will lack infomediaries. We will generate the commonly-used term "revolutionary". We think that most seamless web applications use far too much OWL, and not enough Rails. We think that most innovative web-based applications use far too much PNG, and not enough HTTP. Our technology takes the best aspects of Java and XHTML. Think ultra-customer-directed. What does it really mean to whiteboard "transparently"? Have you ever had to brand your functionality? Free? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof configuration. Think global, collaborative, wireless. The performance factor can be summed up in one word: 60/24/7/365. The user communities factor is magnetic. A company that can generate defiantly will (at some point) be able to envisioneer correctly. What does it really mean to envisioneer "mega-wirelessly"? Quick: do you have a granular plan of action for monitoring emerging interfaces? Our feature set is second to none, but our bleeding-edge process management and non-complex operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Do you have a game plan to become sexy? The initiatives factor is virtual.