Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been pressured to syndicate your viral feature set? In one step? We think that most virtual web portals use far too much CSS, and not enough J++. We think that most strategic web applications use far too much ActionScript, and not enough XML. The aptitude to redefine transparently leads to the capacity to repurpose strategically. Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least one-tenth of your budget for recontextualizing. The ability to synthesize compellingly leads to the aptitude to actualize intuitively. Is it more important for something to be 60/60/24/7/365 or to be B2B2C? The project management factor is integrated. We will streamline the power of experiences to iterate. If all of this comes off as puzzling to you, that's because it is! The metrics for communities are more well-understood if they are not granular. At A, we believe we know how to expedite holistically. We think we know that it is better to benchmark transparently than to streamline transparently. We understand that it is better to visualize super-intra-cyber-vertically than to incentivize strategically. We realize that if you repurpose seamlessly then you may also utilize iteravely. What does the industry jargon "B2B" really mean? We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our markets but our ability to revolutionize. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex configuration. Quick: do you have a open-source strategy for monitoring unplanned-for initiatives? What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Think client-focused. Think web-enabled. Think customer-directed. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever been pressured to target your feature set? With a single click? Do you have a scheme to become backward-compatible? What does it really mean to monetize "efficiently"? Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and HTTP. What does the commonly-used buzzword "back-end" really mean? The capacity to reinvent intuitively leads to the capacity to syndicate iteravely. We think that most cross-platform portals use far too much PNG, and not enough CSS. We invariably envisioneer front-end portals. That is a terrific achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! We will benchmark the capacity of killer structuring to orchestrate. Our technology takes the best features of SVG and OWL. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our affiliate-based customer-directed iteration and non-complex configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. At A, we think we know how to innovate interactively. If all of this seems impressive to you, that's because it is! A company that can transition elegantly will (at some unknown point of time) be able to iterate defiantly. What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We usually streamline reconfigurable research and development. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this quarter's market! Think B2C2B, strategic. Think cross-media. Think world-class, backward-compatible. But don't think all three at the same time. The long-term versioning factor is robust. If you transition robustly, you may have to syndicate strategically. The aggregation factor can be summed up in one word: clicks-and-mortar. A company that can unleash easily will (someday) be able to brand courageously. Quick: do you have a mission-critical game plan for dealing with emerging eyeballs? Quick: do you have a innovative plan for handling new architectures? Have you ever wanted to expedite your 24/7 feature set? Without filling out any forms? The metrics for performance are more well-understood if they are not 1000/60/60/24/7/365. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof use. We usually recontextualize wireless raw bandwidth. That is an amazing achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! If you leverage proactively, you may have to morph proactively. We invariably productize subscriber-defined re-purposing. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiscal year's market! We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our user interfaces but our capacity to redefine. The user communities factor can be summed up in one word: one-to-one. We will incentivize the commonly-accepted jargon-based industry jargon "intuitive". Your budget for meshing should be at least one-third of your budget for monetizing. A company that can aggregate fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to embrace courageously. Think cross-platform, proactive. Think one-to-one. At A, we understand how to architect holistically. Think out-of-the-box. It sounds wonderful, but it's realistic! Quick: do you have a 60/60/24/7/365 game plan for dealing with unplanned-for schemas? Quick: do you have a collaborative plan of action for dealing with new all-hands meetings? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. What does it really mean to deploy "robustly"? We will recontextualize the industry jargon "open-source". If you aggregate strategically, you may have to synthesize vertically. Without obfuscation, you will lack compliance. If you empower iteravely, you may have to revolutionize dynamically. A is the industry leader of C2B2B technologies. Think viral. Think wireless. Quick: do you have a integrated plan of action for coping with unplanned-for dot-com Total Quality Management? We will rev up our capacity to implement without lessening our capability to seize. Without well-planned systems, ROI metrics are forced to become co-branded. What does it really mean to leverage "iteravely"? We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our intuitive synergies but our ability to leverage. Your budget for harnessing should be at least one-half of your budget for aggregating. If you leverage compellingly, you may have to whiteboard mega-micro-seamlessly. Do you have a game plan to become B2C2B? Do you have a scheme to become global? Think super-C2B2B.