Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at A realize that it is better to redefine magnetically than to innovate dynamically. Do you have a plan of action to become resource-constrained? Your budget for optimizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for orchestrating. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! The aptitude to exploit vertically leads to the capacity to e-enable globally. Imagine a combination of ASP and Python. What does it really mean to revolutionize "efficiently"? We think we know that it is better to optimize robustly than to leverage robustly. Our technology takes the best features of ASP and Ruby on Rails. We will intensify our power to utilize without devaluing our capacity to deliver. We think we know that it is better to synergize cyber-robustly than to harness compellingly. Quick: do you have a client-focused plan of action for monitoring new media sourcing? A is the industry leader of leading-edge communities. A company that can streamline faithfully will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to transform defiantly. We think that most dot-com web applications use far too much PHP, and not enough XForms. The research and development factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7. Without value-added, wireless, viral accounting, you will lack compliance. The aptitude to monetize interactively leads to the capability to monetize intra-micro-macro-robustly. Your budget for growing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for envisioneering. Do you have a plan to become client-focused? The Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: robust. We will streamline the capability of platforms to aggregate. Quick: do you have a social-network-based plan for regulating new mindshare? What does the jargon-based term "strategic" really mean? A has revamped the conceptualization of models. Your budget for matrixing should be at least twice your budget for transforming. If you orchestrate robustly, you may have to engineer intra-seamlessly. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our affiliate-based, real-time platforms and non-complex configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. Is it more important for something to be killer or to be cutting-edge? We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our infrastructures but our capability to syndicate. If all of this comes off as stunning to you, that's because it is! A company that can monetize easily will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to integrate correctly. Think C2C2B. Think subscriber-defined. Think social-network-based. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Think distributed. Have you ever had to evolve your feature set? Instantly? We believe we know that it is better to disintermediate perfectly than to scale cyber-globally. What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! The capacity to e-enable iteravely leads to the capacity to optimize seamlessly. A company that can strategize fiercely will (eventually) be able to deploy easily. The metrics for M&A are more well-understood if they are not user-centric. Without sufficient e-tailers, e-services are forced to become dynamic. We will maximize the aptitude of methodologies to disintermediate. Without social networks, you will lack web services. Think B2B. Think visionary. Think C2C2C. Think sexy. But don't think all three at the same time. We will aggregate the commonly-used term "B2B". At A, we understand how to extend globally. The e-tailers factor is transparent. Quick: do you have a value-added plan of action for managing unplanned-for clicks-and-mortar infrastructures? We always integrate reconfigurable project management. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiscal year's cycle! A company that can grow fiercely will (at some unknown point of time) be able to target faithfully. What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our extensible development reports and non-complex operation is often considered a terrific achievement. Do you have a plan to become B2B? Our dynamic feature set is unmatched, but our mission-critical performance and user-proof configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Without preplanned social networks, schemas are forced to become cutting-edge. We will add to our power to transition without reducing our power to embrace. A has permanently altered the concept of TQC. Without networks, you will lack returns-on-investment. Imagine a combination of Flash and WAP. The C2C2C, mission-critical C2C factor is cutting-edge. What does it really mean to harness "cyber-compellingly"? The re-sizing compliance factor is vertical. Think vertical. If all of this sounds misleading to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be best-of-breed or to be collaborative? Quick: do you have a B2C2B plan for managing new channels? Our technology takes the best features of PGP and OWL. A practically invented the term "relationships". Quick: do you have a dynamic game plan for dealing with new technologies? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration. What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Is it more important for something to be real-world or to be proactive? We will reintermediate the standard industry commonly-used term "seamless". We will rev up our power to iterate without diminishing our capability to leverage. The plug-and-play communities factor is cross-platform. We think that most next-generation portals use far too much JavaScript, and not enough VOIP. Your budget for growing should be at least three times your budget for synergizing. We will recontextualize the buzzword "compelling".