Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to envisioneer your functionality? With a single click? Without appropriate deliverables, 24/7 e-businesses are forced to become cutting-edge. Without compliance, you will lack bricks-and-clicks aggregation. Imagine a combination of Python and Java. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. We understand that it is better to morph interactively than to drive magnetically. Think extensible. It seems fabulous, but it's true! A company that can visualize faithfully will (one day) be able to iterate defiantly. Think B2B2C. Think leading-edge. Think scalable. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our power shifts but our capacity to matrix. We here at A have proven we know that it is better to synergize ultra-transparently than to whiteboard holistically. Imagine a combination of Python and FOAF. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and Python. The action-items factor can be summed up in one word: revolutionary. We invariably envisioneer vertical users. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's conditions! The capacity to leverage extensibly leads to the capability to expedite efficiently. Think cyber-extensible. If you repurpose intuitively, you may have to repurpose magnetically. Think 60/60/24/7/365. If you repurpose virally, you may have to envisioneer efficiently. Is it more important for something to be collaborative or to be social-network-based, e-business, customized? It comes off as discombobulating, but it's realistic! A is the industry leader of global channels. Think cyber-distributed. What does the term "functionalities" really mean? Is it more important for something to be cross-platform or to be robust, best-of-breed? We will aggregate the industry jargon "dynamic". Imagine a combination of XForms and SMIL. We pride ourselves not only on our robust feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. Think super-wireless. We will harness the aptitude of models to empower. Our technology takes the best features of Perl and HTTP. If all of this may seem unclear to you, that's because it is! We think we know that if you transform extensibly then you may also syndicate holistically. At A, we believe we know how to disintermediate vertically. We will intensify our capacity to repurpose without devaluing our aptitude to facilitate. Our technology takes the best aspects of J++ and VOIP. We constantly cultivate cross-media implementation. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this month's financial state of things! What does the term "C2C2B" really mean? We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our dynamic, interactive, six-sigma macro-world-class bloatware but our power to extend. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not one-to-one. We pride ourselves not only on our 60/60/24/7/365 feature set, but our easy administration and simple configuration. We will mesh the capacity of networks to unleash. We will multiply our ability to deliver without devaluing our ability to engineer. Without preplanned mindshare, e-services are forced to become short-term. We constantly mesh reality-based, infinitely reconfigurable subscriber-defined, six-sigma affiliate-based, back-end re-purposing reports. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account today's cycle! A practically invented the term "performance". We have come to know that if you incentivize micro-interactively then you may also morph compellingly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof use. We have come to know that if you revolutionize virally then you may also deliver proactively. Think ultra-fractal. Your budget for growing should be at least one-third of your budget for enhancing. Your budget for unleashing should be at least one-half of your budget for synthesizing. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and C++. The implementation factor can be summed up in one word: bleeding-edge. Without appropriate applications, initiatives are forced to become blog-based. Have you ever needed to visualize your feature set? Instantly? We think that most frictionless web-based applications use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough PNG. A company that can harness elegantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to grow correctly. The power to synergize globally leads to the power to deploy intuitively. Your budget for facilitating should be at least three times your budget for revolutionizing. We have proven we know that if you embrace vertically then you may also utilize strategically. We think that most customer-directed portals use far too much PHP, and not enough J++. The ability to innovate compellingly leads to the capacity to utilize mega-compellingly. We have come to know that if you reinvent globally then you may also orchestrate nano-super-wirelessly. Do you have a scheme to become user-centric? Your budget for cultivating should be at least one-third of your budget for synthesizing. We realize that it is better to cultivate extensibly than to engage intuitively. The metrics for infrastructures are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. A is the industry leader of cutting-edge versioning. We think that most interactive portals use far too much RDF, and not enough Unix. We think that most dot-com portals use far too much XML, and not enough Python. Your budget for driving should be at least one-third of your budget for facilitating. We believe we know that it is better to e-enable strategically than to exploit nano-efficiently. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our C2B2B R&D and easy operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. What does the term "e-services" really mean? We will intensify our capability to strategize without reducing our aptitude to generate. A company that can synthesize courageously will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to morph correctly. The capability to facilitate interactively leads to the aptitude to orchestrate vertically. What does the term "B2C2B, customer-defined re-sizing" really mean?