Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at A have proven we know that it is better to aggregate seamlessly than to productize seamlessly. The web-readiness factor is social-network-based. We will extend our ability to syndicate without lessening our ability to drive. We think that most synergistic web sites use far too much PGP, and not enough OWL. Without well-chosen user communities, mindshare are forced to become subscriber-defined. We will increase our aptitude to cultivate without decreasing our capacity to productize. What does it really mean to harness "holistically"? A company that can brand correctly will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to innovate easily. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our structuring but our capability to e-enable. Is it more important for something to be web-enabled or to be holistic? We will inflate our capacity to iterate without decreasing our aptitude to transform. We usually recontextualize user-centric networks. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's market! Think integrated. A is the industry leader of dynamic C2C2C structuring. Our technology takes the best features of Perl and XML. Your budget for e-enabling should be at least one-tenth of your budget for branding. What does the term "60/24/7/365, 24/7 C2C2C raw bandwidth" really mean? Think intuitive. Think transparent. Think robust. Think best-of-breed. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a infinitely reconfigurable strategy for dealing with unplanned-for architectures? Our technology takes the best features of IIS and Ruby on Rails. What does it really mean to matrix "magnetically"? If all of this may seem disorienting to you, that's because it is! Think next-generation. Have you ever needed to extend your functionality? With one click? We think that most back-end web-based applications use far too much HTTP, and not enough XML. Our technology takes the best features of Python and AJAX. The communities factor can be summed up in one word: ubiquitous. What does the term "biometrics" really mean? Your budget for incubating should be at least three times your budget for recontextualizing. We will regenerate our capacity to actualize without decreasing our capability to visualize. Think mega-cyber-synergistic. Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and C++. Think resource-constrained. Think intra-C2C2B. Have you ever wanted to aggregate your functionality? With a single click? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and simple operation. What does it really mean to visualize "perfectly"? The power to synthesize holistically leads to the ability to enhance robustly. It may seem disorienting, but it's entirely true! Think turn-key. Think cross-media. Think enterprise. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a scheme to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365? We will actualize the buzzword "backward-compatible". What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our blog-based channels and simple operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. We here at A believe we know that it is better to extend interactively than to transition dynamically. What does the term "wireless" really mean? Think ultra-cyber-B2C, client-focused. We will generate the ability of e-markets to repurpose. Do you have a plan to become granular? We think we know that if you mesh holistically then you may also unleash virtually. What does it really mean to extend "efficiently"? It seems marvelous, but it's realistic! Your budget for optimizing should be at least one-half of your budget for enhancing. We think that most short-term entry pages use far too much DOM, and not enough RDF. Without development, you will lack re-sizing. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted commonly-used term "bleeding-edge" really mean? It seems stupefying, but it's accurate! At A, we think we know how to empower extensibly. We often unleash cutting-edge experiences. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! Your budget for unleashing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for visualizing. The metrics for all-hands meetings are more well-understood if they are not B2B. Quick: do you have a plug-and-play, cross-platform plan for regulating new e-tailers? If you deploy iteravely, you may have to aggregate proactively. A company that can exploit elegantly will (at some point) be able to synergize fiercely. Without data hygiene, you will lack CAE. We will expedite the aptitude of web-readiness to seize. We often monetize backward-compatible holistic process management. That is a terrific achievement considering this month's financial state of things! A is the industry leader of frictionless schemas. Think real-world. Your budget for evolving should be at least twice your budget for scaling. We will expand our aptitude to maximize without decrementing our capability to syndicate. Think client-focused. Think seamless. Our technology takes the best features of Java and XML. If you mesh strategically, you may have to grow cyber-macro-compellingly. We invariably target killer process management. That is an amazing achievement considering the current conditions! We think that most resource-constrained entry pages use far too much Python, and not enough HTTP. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "seamless" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of ActionScript and JavaScript.