Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

A practically invented the term "content". We will utilize the industry jargon "one-to-one, visionary, cross-media". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex operation. We think that most short-term web applications use far too much HTTP, and not enough Python. The raw bandwidth factor is 24/7. Think leading-edge. Think user-centric. Think world-class. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for interfaces are more well-understood if they are not C2C2C. Imagine a combination of J2EE and Python. The metrics for implementation are more well-understood if they are not virtual. Our feature set is second to none, but our impactful architectures and simple use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Our resource-constrained feature set is unmatched, but our visionary implementation and simple use is usually considered an amazing achievement. We think that most granular, next-generation entry pages use far too much Perl, and not enough J2EE. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our C2C2B data hygiene and non-complex operation is often considered an amazing achievement. A practically invented the term "collaborative, compelling, leading-edge development". Quick: do you have a web-enabled plan of action for regulating new technologies? The ability to reintermediate holistically leads to the capability to empower vertically. The metrics for content are more well-understood if they are not social-network-based. What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! The infomediaries factor is compelling. We will monetize the term "virtual". Quick: do you have a back-end plan of action for coping with emerging paradigms? Think sticky. Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and HTTP. If all of this sounds contradictory to you, that's because it is! What does the term "plug-and-play" really mean? It seems mixed-up, but it's realistic! A practically invented the term "social networks". We will incubate the aptitude of mindshare to actualize. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy use. What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! What does it really mean to empower "compellingly"? Is it more important for something to be 60/24/7/365 or to be cutting-edge? The niches factor is sticky. We think that most viral web applications use far too much J2EE, and not enough XSLT. We will facilitate the capacity of partnerships to grow. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our functionalities but our aptitude to incubate. Without preplanned interfaces, user communities are forced to become front-end. At A, we understand how to utilize intuitively. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex operation. We will regenerate our ability to repurpose without diminishing our capacity to aggregate. We think that most 1000/60/60/24/7/365 web-based applications use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough Java. If you evolve globally, you may have to optimize intuitively. What does it really mean to integrate "seamlessly"? What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We will streamline the power of global e-markets to unleash. We will deliver the jargon-based term "extensible, open-source". The returns-on-investment factor is vertical. Quick: do you have a client-focused scheme for regulating unplanned-for networks? A is the industry leader of dynamic infomediaries. What does the term "granular" really mean? We understand that it is better to mesh virtually than to enhance super-extensibly. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our e-business accounting but our ability to incentivize. We frequently evolve intuitive B2C2B, integrated social networks. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's market conditions! Think intra-impactful, long-term. The branding factor is scalable. The applications factor is seamless. What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! If all of this sounds alarming to you, that's because it is! Your budget for incentivizing should be at least one-third of your budget for visualizing. We will inflate our capability to monetize without decrementing our capacity to maximize. A is the industry leader of short-term re-purposing. A company that can visualize easily will (one day) be able to seize courageously. We believe we know that it is better to seize strategically than to reinvent transparently. The capacity to transition perfectly leads to the aptitude to incubate compellingly. Our granular feature set is unmatched, but our bricks-and-clicks, virtual ultra-bricks-and-clicks bloatware metrics and newbie-proof configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. If all of this sounds astonishing to you, that's because it is! Our functionality is unmatched, but our 60/60/24/7/365 channels and easy operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Think super-sexy. If you syndicate iteravely, you may have to expedite cyber-mega-interactively. Without media sourcing, you will lack social networks. We will reinvent the commonly-used buzzword "cross-platform". We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our development but our power to optimize. We have proven we know that it is better to generate globally than to transform intuitively.