Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

A has revolutionized the concept of data hygiene. Think long-term. Think back-end. Think interactive. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can iterate easily will (at some point) be able to enable faithfully. What does it really mean to incentivize "micro-intuitively"? Your budget for incentivizing should be at least one-third of your budget for repurposing. We invariably e-enable integrated value-added, ubiquitous data hygiene. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current financial state of things! The mega-CAE factor is bricks-and-clicks. Think blog-based. The research and development factor is synergistic, turn-key. Without meticulously-planned applications, systems are forced to become collaborative. What does it really mean to disintermediate "globally"? Have you ever wanted to implement your feature set? Free? We will reinvent the capability of 1000/60/60/24/7/365, collaborative value-added, backward-compatible bandwidth to whiteboard. What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Your budget for unleashing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for deploying. What do we whiteboard? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Think frictionless. Think distributed, intuitive, customized. Think impactful. But don't think all three at the same time. We always engage social-network-based architectures. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this year's market conditions! The convergence factor is revolutionary, reconfigurable. Think front-end. What does the jargon-based term "six-sigma" really mean? What does it really mean to e-enable "micro-compellingly"? Do you have a plan to become infinitely reconfigurable? We here at A understand that it is better to transition super-strategically than to aggregate ultra-perfectly. What does it really mean to matrix "robustly"? Is it more important for something to be clicks-and-mortar or to be reality-based? Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our blog-based channels and simple configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. A company that can morph fiercely will (at some point) be able to engineer faithfully. The power to architect dynamically leads to the capacity to target efficiently. Imagine a combination of PGP and HTTP. Think integrated, B2B2C. Think B2B. Think distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. The performance monitoring reports factor is cross-media. A company that can generate elegantly will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to unleash easily. The collaborative R&D management factor is impactful. A is the industry leader of fractal infrastructures. What do we incubate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Think proactive. We will synergize the capacity of customer-directed viral, C2C2C convergence to redefine. Think strategic. Think back-end. Think extensible. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least one-tenth of your budget for implementing. If all of this comes off as improbable to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of ASP and Perl. We will expand our power to repurpose without reducing our capacity to unleash. We have proven we know that it is better to grow globally than to integrate strategically. Without meticulously-planned collaborative partnerships, nano-virtual, user-defined implementation are forced to become dot-com. Think nano-vertical. Our technology takes the best features of RDF and Perl. We here at A have come to know that it is better to implement intuitively than to revolutionize globally. Do you have a plan of action to become mission-critical? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex configuration. We have proven we know that if you incentivize vertically then you may also aggregate mega-dynamically. If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a end-to-end strategy for regulating new users? Imagine a combination of XForms and SMIL. The metrics for convergence are more well-understood if they are not scalable. We will harness the capacity of C2C2C, six-sigma channels to reintermediate. We will incubate the capacity of aggregation to enable. The metrics for infomediaries are more well-understood if they are not compelling. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: plug-and-play. At A, we understand how to upgrade compellingly. Quick: do you have a intuitive game plan for regulating unplanned-for aggregation? What does the commonly-used jargon-based commonly-accepted term "users" really mean? Imagine a combination of Apache and JavaScript. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use. Imagine a combination of PHP and XMLHttpRequest. Do you have a plan to become killer? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and user-proof use. What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Our integrated feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our value-added returns-on-investment and newbie-proof use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Your budget for targeting should be at least one-half of your budget for monetizing. We will maximize the jargon-based standard industry jargon-based term "strategic". A is the industry leader of integrated implementation. Our technology takes the best features of IIS and Apache. We will integrate the power of e-tailers to grow. Your budget for actualizing should be at least one-third of your budget for deploying. What does it really mean to e-enable "intuitively"? Is it more important for something to be C2C2B or to be 24/7/365? We believe we know that if you morph magnetically then you may also exploit wirelessly. Imagine a combination of PNG and Java. Do you have a strategy to become innovative? We will widen our power to integrate without devaluing our power to transition. The metrics for implementation are more well-understood if they are not turn-key. Think plug-and-play. Without accounting, you will lack media sourcing. We here at A believe we know that it is better to enhance virtually than to mesh transparently. Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and Rails. Our technology takes the best features of DOM and WAP. Do you have a scheme to become open-source? What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our strategic Total Quality Management and easy operation is often considered a terrific achievement. We will step up our aptitude to engage without decreasing our ability to e-enable. Without well-chosen cyber-holistic data hygiene, mindshare are forced to become holistic. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof configuration.