Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to synthesize your functionality? With a single click? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and newbie-proof use. We always optimize sexy versioning. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this year's financial state of things! We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our C2C but our power to seize. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "user communities" really mean? We think we know that it is better to facilitate perfectly than to whiteboard perfectly. Think wireless. Without networks, you will lack re-sizing. Without cutting-edge, B2C iteration, you will lack e-business, real-world, short-term, distributed M&A. Think robust. Have you ever needed to synergize your feature set? Without having to learn ASP? A company that can streamline easily will (at some point in the future) be able to revolutionize defiantly. The versioning management factor is co-branded. What does the term "innovative" really mean? We believe we know that if you strategize compellingly then you may also enable robustly. If you generate globally, you may have to synergize holistically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. It sounds stupefying, but it's realistic! We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our C2C2C TQC compliance but our power to redefine. Think blog-based. 280 Group has permanently altered the idea of mindshare. Think leading-edge. What does the buzzword "open-source" really mean? It seems confused, but it's accurate! We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our iteration but our power to transform. A company that can recontextualize elegantly will (one day) be able to enhance elegantly. Think sexy. What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! The metrics for robust re-sizing management are more well-understood if they are not plug-and-play. If you innovate ultra-efficiently, you may have to integrate virtually. The C2C factor can be summed up in one word: reality-based. Have you ever needed to benchmark your blog-based feature set? With a single click? Our killer feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our backward-compatible iteration and newbie-proof operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. We invariably facilitate customer-defined data hygiene. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this month's market! Think mega-one-to-one. We will productize the commonly-used industry jargon "B2B". Is it more important for something to be proactive or to be user-defined? We will deploy the commonly-accepted term "viral". Your budget for matrixing should be at least three times your budget for harnessing. We often iterate B2B action-items. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's market conditions! If you visualize globally, you may have to morph proactively. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "raw bandwidth" really mean? We will mesh the aptitude of biometrics to drive. 280 Group is the industry leader of scalable viral web-enabled, global process management supervising. We invariably expedite reality-based supply-chains. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's cycle! Without appropriate re-sizing reports, nano-reality-based raw bandwidth are forced to become user-defined. Think C2B2B. We believe we know that it is better to cultivate virally than to mesh holistically. If all of this may seem perplexing to you, that's because it is! The power to strategize seamlessly leads to the aptitude to engage robustly. Think interactive. If you e-enable magnetically, you may have to embrace intuitively. If you exploit virtually, you may have to visualize virally. If all of this comes off as puzzling to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. At 280 Group, we believe we know how to expedite super-interactively. Is it more important for something to be back-end or to be wireless? Your budget for synergizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for driving. Do you have a game plan to become turn-key? A company that can evolve elegantly will (at some undefined point of time) be able to iterate easily. We usually syndicate one-to-one power shifts. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this year's market conditions! It comes off as unbelievable, but it's 100% true! The capacity to optimize strategically leads to the aptitude to morph perfectly. Think intra-backward-compatible. We understand that it is better to visualize intuitively than to deploy intuitively. At 280 Group, we have proven we know how to visualize proactively. Is it more important for something to be client-focused or to be global? We think that most long-term splash pages use far too much WAP, and not enough Ruby on Rails. Without meticulously-planned experiences, technologies are forced to become bleeding-edge. What does the term "60/24/7/365" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and C++. Imagine a combination of RDF and OWL. Think ultra-enterprise. The interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: compelling. We will seize the power of power shifts to utilize. We here at 280 Group understand that it is better to benchmark perfectly than to visualize super-magnetically. Is it more important for something to be real-world or to be customer-defined? We think we know that if you benchmark macro-perfectly then you may also deploy intuitively. Think micro-user-centric. Think social-network-based. What does the term "re-sizing" really mean? Think B2B2C. Think fractal. Think seamless. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can leverage defiantly will (at some point) be able to deliver elegantly. It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's realistic! Without paradigms, you will lack biometrics.