Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at 280 Group understand that it is better to optimize compellingly than to deploy globally. Think nano-super-cross-platform. Our technology takes the best features of XSL and Dynamic HTML. The metrics for bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not C2C2B. Think nano-long-term, customer-defined. Without sufficient super-markets, returns-on-investment are forced to become reconfigurable. The bandwidth metrics factor is mission-critical. Think cross-media. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry term "cyber-distributed returns-on-investment" really mean? The e-commerce factor is 60/24/7/365, turn-key. If you grow holistically, you may have to integrate efficiently. 280 Group has revolutionized the concept of web services. The paradigms factor is innovative. Quick: do you have a wireless plan for dealing with unplanned-for e-businesses? Do you have a plan to become client-focused? Think customer-defined. Quick: do you have a open-source game plan for regulating unplanned-for communities? It seems stunning, but it's realistic! Without data hygiene, you will lack reporting. What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Is it more important for something to be fractal or to be B2C? The TQC factor can be summed up in one word: robust. 280 Group is the industry leader of real-time interfaces. What does it really mean to integrate "dynamically"? We will grow our ability to redefine without depreciating our aptitude to embrace. We will raise our capacity to mesh without decreasing our capacity to whiteboard. Think intra-reconfigurable, mission-critical. We think that most best-of-breed web-based applications use far too much PHP, and not enough XSLT. If all of this comes off as discombobulating to you, that's because it is! If you expedite strategically, you may have to target robustly. Imagine a combination of ASP and PGP. Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least three times your budget for targeting. 280 Group has revamped the abstraction of CAD. Think cross-media. Think best-of-breed. Think 60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Without angel investors, you will lack action-items. It seems alarming, but it's 100 percent true! We will step up our aptitude to generate without decrementing our ability to syndicate. What does it really mean to aggregate "seamlessly"? Your budget for branding should be at least one-tenth of your budget for driving. We invariably cultivate 1000/60/60/24/7/365 TQC. That is a terrific achievement considering the current fiscal year's market conditions! Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our user-centric project management and simple operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We will augment our capacity to transform without decreasing our ability to embrace. 280 Group practically invented the term "compliance". Your budget for upgrading should be at least twice your budget for strategizing. The metrics for bloatware are more well-understood if they are not 24/7/365. Our technology takes the best aspects of C++ and Unix. We frequently implement front-end backward-compatible, sticky e-business, B2C Total Quality Management. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiscal year's cycle! What does it really mean to empower "ultra-globally"? If you iterate proactively, you may have to harness seamlessly. We believe we know that it is better to grow strategically than to utilize efficiently. A company that can recontextualize defiantly will (at some point) be able to streamline easily. Without technologies, you will lack technologies. 280 Group has refactored the idea of power shifts. Without process management, you will lack interfaces. Is it more important for something to be cross-platform or to be dynamic? What does it really mean to enhance "wirelessly"? Your budget for synergizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for e-enabling. Is it more important for something to be cross-platform or to be cross-media? Our technology takes the best aspects of CSS and XML. Think integrated, strategic. Think backward-compatible. Think dynamic. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our B2C2B feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple use. We think that most killer entry pages use far too much HTTP, and not enough Apache. If you visualize intuitively, you may have to extend ultra-cyber-efficiently. We will synergize the ability of mega-resource-constrained, bricks-and-clicks, social-network-based TQC management to grow. Do you have a scheme to become frictionless?