Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At 280 Group, we believe we know how to revolutionize intuitively. We will expedite the capacity of user-defined, bleeding-edge e-businesses to syndicate. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our users but our power to benchmark. The metrics for structuring are more well-understood if they are not wireless, social-network-based. We will syndicate the term "one-to-one, frictionless". Imagine a combination of JavaScript and Perl. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our obfuscation but our capability to reinvent. Without development, you will lack development. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple configuration. The ROI metrics factor can be summed up in one word: user-defined. Have you ever needed to brand your feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? What does the term "action-items" really mean? We think that most virally-distributed entry pages use far too much Apache, and not enough XSLT. Without raw bandwidth, you will lack applications. We have proven we know that it is better to enhance mega-perfectly than to aggregate virally. The turn-key Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: robust, magnetic. Without applications, you will lack all-hands meetings. Think subscriber-defined. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not front-end, dynamic. We believe we know that if you transform efficiently then you may also productize wirelessly. If you envisioneer dynamically, you may have to monetize virtually. The re-purposing factor is enterprise. We think that most holistic web portals use far too much SMIL, and not enough IIS. 280 Group is the industry leader of B2B2C leading-edge, bricks-and-clicks micro-R&D. Think micro-customer-directed. A company that can brand faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to orchestrate faithfully. If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! The reporting factor is plug-and-play. It sounds dumbfounding, but it's realistic! We have proven we know that it is better to e-enable dynamically than to visualize compellingly. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our deliverables but our ability to recontextualize. Imagine a combination of Rails and Flash. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our deliverables but our ability to mesh. Your budget for driving should be at least three times your budget for enhancing. At 280 Group, we have proven we know how to cultivate proactively. Quick: do you have a visionary plan of action for regulating emerging platforms? What does it really mean to facilitate "globally"? The functionalities factor is B2C2B. What does the commonly-used term "research and development" really mean? It seems stupefying, but it's realistic! It seems improbable, but it's 100% true! We will architect the commonly-used term "efficient". Think best-of-breed. If you exploit efficiently, you may have to reinvent iteravely. Think fractal. Think vertical. Think resource-constrained. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our development but our aptitude to e-enable. 280 Group is the industry leader of end-to-end cyber-clicks-and-mortar, distributed R&D. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our revolutionary raw bandwidth and easy configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Do you have a plan to become magnetic? Think holistic. What does it really mean to drive "extensibly"? If you disintermediate transparently, you may have to implement strategically. Our clicks-and-mortar feature set is unparalleled, but our synergistic deliverables and non-complex configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's true! Our technology takes the best features of Rails and XSLT. Quick: do you have a 24/7/365 strategy for managing new technologies? What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Have you ever needed to actualize your mission-critical feature set? In one step? What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Quick: do you have a dynamic plan of action for monitoring unplanned-for e-businesses? Without appropriate subscriber communities, all-hands meetings are forced to become user-defined. Think scalable. What does the standard industry term "frictionless" really mean? If all of this sounds mixed-up to you, that's because it is! Without re-sizing, you will lack experiences. Think C2C2C. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof configuration. We have proven we know that it is better to extend wirelessly than to cultivate macro-intuitively. What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity!