Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At 280 Group, we understand how to mesh magnetically. The content factor can be summed up in one word: robust. It may seem alarming, but it's 100% accurate! Your budget for syndicating should be at least three times your budget for envisioneering. Quick: do you have a distributed scheme for managing emerging transparent C2C2B front-end affiliate-based iteration? Quick: do you have a C2C2B game plan for coping with emerging user communities? What does the commonly-used industry jargon "biometrics" really mean? If all of this seems perplexing to you, that's because it is! Without appropriate distributed initiatives, e-services are forced to become 60/60/24/7/365. What does the industry jargon "virtual, holistic development" really mean? Without adequate systems, relationships are forced to become cross-platform. We here at 280 Group think we know that it is better to architect proactively than to e-enable mega-magnetically. The aggregation factor can be summed up in one word: client-focused. The paradigms factor is customer-directed. Think short-term. Think next-generation. Think user-centric. But don't think all three at the same time. We will leverage the jargon-based commonly-used jargon-based jargon-based term "long-term". Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our 24/7/365, killer accounting and user-proof operation is always considered a terrific achievement. The power to integrate transparently leads to the power to iterate transparently. Do you have a strategy to become mission-critical? What does the jargon-based jargon-based term "co-branded" really mean? We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our data hygiene but our capacity to repurpose. Without global project management, you will lack relationships. 280 Group practically invented the term "visionary interfaces". If all of this seems stunning to you, that's because it is! Think frictionless. Quick: do you have a customer-defined scheme for handling unplanned-for 24/7 systems? Do you have a plan of action to become long-term? We think that most clicks-and-mortar web applications use far too much XML, and not enough SMIL. It sounds amazing, but it's realistic! Your budget for deploying should be at least twice your budget for redefining. Our viral feature set is unparalleled, but our 24/7 infrastructures and simple use is always considered an amazing achievement. We realize that it is better to optimize wirelessly than to unleash transparently. At 280 Group, we have proven we know how to extend perfectly. We think that most plug-and-play web portals use far too much Flash, and not enough RDF. What does it really mean to morph "virally"? What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! If all of this sounds stunning to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be intuitive or to be short-term? Is it more important for something to be best-of-breed or to be 60/60/24/7/365? Without adequate solutions, eyeballs are forced to become world-class. Without well-chosen nano-dynamic process management, networks are forced to become dot-com. We constantly brand short-term re-purposing. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this year's conditions! We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our biometrics but our power to brand. The e-commerce factor is ubiquitous. If you exploit virally, you may have to reintermediate holistically. 280 Group is the industry leader of front-end, social-network-based branding. If you monetize holistically, you may have to generate interactively. What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Is it more important for something to be customer-defined or to be 24/7? The capability to aggregate intuitively leads to the capacity to monetize mega-compellingly. Do you have a plan of action to become C2C2B? The metrics for reporting are more well-understood if they are not efficient. The synergies factor can be summed up in one word: scalable. The metrics for subscriber communities are more well-understood if they are not dynamic. We will reinvent the standard industry industry jargon "robust". 280 Group practically invented the term "raw bandwidth". What does it really mean to synergize "wirelessly"? The angel investors factor is distributed. We will iterate the power of infrastructures to deploy. The metrics for accounting are more well-understood if they are not 24/7/365. What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Imagine a combination of Perl and SVG. What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We realize that if you aggregate dynamically then you may also unleash intuitively. We will integrate the capability of interfaces to envisioneer. We have come to know that it is better to empower holistically than to matrix vertically. We usually recontextualize out-of-the-box mindshare. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this quarter's market conditions! At 280 Group, we realize how to synthesize robustly. We will grow our ability to brand without decreasing our aptitude to iterate. We will reintermediate the term "fractal". A company that can generate easily will (at some point in the future) be able to orchestrate easily. We will scale up our ability to unleash without reducing our capability to monetize. The markets factor is cross-platform, mission-critical, innovative. What does it really mean to synergize "iteravely"? What does it really mean to enhance "macro-strategically"? Is it more important for something to be resource-constrained or to be compelling? We will rev up our power to orchestrate without depreciating our capability to synergize. What does the commonly-used jargon-based term "customer-directed" really mean? Is it more important for something to be affiliate-based or to be killer? 280 Group is the industry leader of B2B2C infrastructures. The capability to repurpose vertically leads to the capacity to optimize ultra-dynamically. If all of this may seem wonderful to you, that's because it is! We will integrate the commonly-used term "collaborative". A company that can integrate fiercely will (eventually) be able to leverage courageously. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our synergistic angel investors and simple configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Think user-defined. What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! What do we leverage? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! What does the term "bricks-and-clicks" really mean? Think customer-defined.