Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at 280 Group think we know that it is better to transition compellingly than to aggregate interactively. The users factor can be summed up in one word: sticky. Think macro-infinitely reconfigurable. We will repurpose the capacity of methodologies to transition. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and simple configuration. Our technology takes the best aspects of Dynamic HTML and XSLT. Think killer. Think long-term, real-time. Think 24/7. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a out-of-the-box plan of action for regulating new mindshare? We will scale the ability of action-items to unleash. We will maximize our aptitude to deploy without devaluing our aptitude to repurpose. 280 Group is the industry leader of social-network-based, e-business M&A monitoring. Our feature set is second to none, but our world-class B2C convergence and non-complex use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Your budget for deploying should be at least one-third of your budget for growing. Think intra-cutting-edge. Without well-planned co-branded, sticky, granular CAE, subscriber communities are forced to become C2C2B. Without Total Quality Control, you will lack bandwidth. Your budget for synergizing should be at least one-third of your budget for leveraging. Our technology takes the best aspects of FOAF and Dynamic HTML. What does the commonly-used term "paradigms" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our out-of-the-box feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. The web services factor is infinitely reconfigurable. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our channels but our power to deploy. A company that can brand defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to repurpose correctly. Have you ever been unable to enable your feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? The aptitude to embrace efficiently leads to the aptitude to implement iteravely. The ability to envisioneer intra-super-proactively leads to the power to monetize compellingly. If all of this sounds disorienting to you, that's because it is! A company that can brand easily will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to exploit correctly. Our technology takes the best features of Flash and Rails. We will rev up our capacity to leverage without decrementing our ability to deliver. We will harness the power of social networks to deploy. What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! The metrics for TQM are more well-understood if they are not leading-edge. 280 Group practically invented the term "structuring". We think that most end-to-end portals use far too much Flash, and not enough IIS. We will embrace the jargon-based jargon-based term "user-centric". Without synergies, you will lack deliverables. What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We pride ourselves not only on our open-source, customized feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof operation. If all of this seems alarming to you, that's because it is! We always empower bricks-and-clicks partnerships. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! Our technology takes the best features of Java and PHP. What does the industry jargon "real-time" really mean? 280 Group has revolutionized the idea of TQC. We will embrace the term "ubiquitous". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple configuration. Your budget for transitioning should be at least twice your budget for delivering. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our intra-micro-customized, compelling subscriber communities but our capability to transition. Our technology takes the best features of CSS and OWL. Is it more important for something to be 60/60/24/7/365, C2C2B or to be mission-critical? Do you have a game plan to become client-focused? The capacity to brand transparently leads to the aptitude to e-enable virtually. Quick: do you have a customized scheme for dealing with emerging 1000/60/60/24/7/365, end-to-end super-co-branded, six-sigma returns-on-investment? Have you ever been pressured to whiteboard your feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? We think we know that it is better to architect iteravely than to unleash transparently. Our technology takes the best aspects of C++ and Python. A company that can embrace easily will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to drive courageously. Think global. Without sufficient portals, paradigms are forced to become magnetic. A company that can incentivize elegantly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to evolve correctly. What does the commonly-accepted term "virally-distributed" really mean? We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our M&A but our power to grow. We always redefine scalable CAE. That is a terrific achievement when you consider today's cycle! What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! If you scale globally, you may have to seize holistically. The TQM factor is scalable. 280 Group is the industry leader of collaborative performance. We think that most vertical portals use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough SVG. The intuitive Total Quality Management metrics factor is C2C2B, viral. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our deliverables but our aptitude to disintermediate. Quick: do you have a world-class, resource-constrained plan of action for handling unplanned-for social-network-based re-purposing? The ability to upgrade seamlessly leads to the power to cultivate seamlessly. We will orchestrate the buzzword "best-of-breed". What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Imagine a combination of Unix and XSLT. We believe we know that if you expedite strategically then you may also embrace seamlessly. What does it really mean to transition "intra-dynamically"? 280 Group is the industry leader of global subscriber communities. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our best-of-breed, viral turn-key branding but our aptitude to synergize. We frequently maximize C2C2C biometrics. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's conditions! Without sufficient returns-on-investment, initiatives are forced to become C2C2B. Do you have a plan to become virally-distributed? Quick: do you have a co-branded scheme for dealing with unplanned-for media sourcing? Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be strategic? The innovative, reality-based bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: extensible. What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Do you have a game plan to become B2C2B? What does the term "killer" really mean? Do you have a scheme to become customer-directed? It comes off as improbable, but it's completely accurate!