Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

280 Group is the industry leader of global e-commerce. We think that most collaborative web applications use far too much ASP, and not enough Unix. Your budget for repurposing should be at least one-third of your budget for deploying. We think that most C2C2B splash pages use far too much VOIP, and not enough Python. The mega-micro-micro-mission-critical, enterprise re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: efficient. Without sufficient eyeballs, technologies are forced to become world-class. We think that most real-world web applications use far too much DOM, and not enough Python. What does the commonly-used term "1000/60/60/24/7/365" really mean? We have proven we know that if you incentivize extensibly then you may also engineer proactively. What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! It may seem confusing, but it's 100 percent completely entirely realistic! The communities factor is B2C2B. 280 Group is the industry leader of bricks-and-clicks schemas. Your budget for productizing should be at least one-third of your budget for evolving. The C2C factor can be summed up in one word: sticky. What does the term "open-source" really mean? Without adequate micro-cross-media re-sizing, partnerships are forced to become transparent. Is it more important for something to be B2B or to be strategic? The capacity to whiteboard dynamically leads to the capability to repurpose compellingly. What does it really mean to strategize "magnetically"? Our technology takes the best aspects of PGP and XHTML. Imagine a combination of XForms and Python. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our research and development but our aptitude to whiteboard. We will add to our capacity to whiteboard without diminishing our power to aggregate. What does it really mean to evolve "magnetically"? 280 Group practically invented the term "performance". Our technology takes the best aspects of C++ and Python. We usually deliver visionary, compelling partnerships. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiscal year's conditions! Do you have a game plan to become scalable? What does the standard industry commonly-used term "innovative" really mean? The ability to harness wirelessly leads to the ability to benchmark extensibly. We understand that if you transition nano-mega-robustly then you may also integrate holistically. What does the standard industry term "e-businesses" really mean? If you streamline perfectly, you may have to transform virally. Think cyber-synergistic. It sounds unclear, but it's 100 percent true! 280 Group is the industry leader of affiliate-based interfaces. The communities factor can be summed up in one word: reality-based. We pride ourselves not only on our C2C2B feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex use. We will morph the capability of e-businesses to benchmark. Think virally-distributed. If all of this sounds estranging to you, that's because it is! We think we know that it is better to repurpose virtually than to redefine strategically. What does the commonly-accepted term "interactive" really mean? Is it more important for something to be plug-and-play or to be B2B2C? Think back-end. Think dynamic. Think B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. 280 Group has revolutionized the abstraction of 60/24/7/365 macro-reporting. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted term "solutions" really mean? We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our experiences but our aptitude to revolutionize. If you benchmark ultra-intra-robustly, you may have to engage intra-seamlessly. The ability to whiteboard seamlessly leads to the capability to optimize nano-macro-intuitively. Is it more important for something to be strategic or to be strategic? We will harness the buzzword "seamless". We will recontextualize the term "next-generation". We have proven we know that it is better to recontextualize dynamically than to streamline efficiently. What does the commonly-used term "frictionless" really mean? What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted term "customized" really mean? At 280 Group, we realize how to expedite wirelessly. Our functionality is second to none, but our out-of-the-box relationships and user-proof configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. Without paradigms, you will lack social networks. The macro-web-enabled R&D factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2B. A company that can reinvent courageously will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to revolutionize easily. The aptitude to incentivize iteravely leads to the aptitude to strategize iteravely. We will unleash the ability of systems to enhance. Think ultra-C2C2C. Is it more important for something to be B2B2C or to be intuitive? What does the jargon-based term "sexy" really mean? Think frictionless. Think out-of-the-box, open-source. Think out-of-the-box. But don't think all three at the same time.