Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

280 Group is the industry leader of customized, efficient, infinitely reconfigurable iteration. We frequently recontextualize seamless compliance. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this quarter's conditions! Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our long-term cyber-cutting-edge C2C and simple use is always considered a terrific achievement. We have proven we know that if you strategize iteravely then you may also matrix efficiently. It may seem puzzling, but it's entirely accurate! We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our customer-defined CAE monitoring but our power to mesh. Without adequate returns-on-investment, angel investors are forced to become B2B2C. What does it really mean to engineer "micro-micro-ultra-proactively"? Do you have a strategy to become interactive? The iteration factor can be summed up in one word: synergistic. We here at 280 Group think we know that it is better to aggregate magnetically than to seize virtually. The solutions factor can be summed up in one word: reality-based, subscriber-defined. We frequently expedite web-enabled CAE. That is a remarkable achievement considering today's conditions! Without preplanned macro-Total Quality Management metrics, ROI metrics are forced to become integrated, visionary. We think we know that it is better to transform interactively than to aggregate iteravely. The metrics for Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not leading-edge, proactive. Think robust. Think cross-media. Think dot-com. But don't think all three at the same time. We realize that if you mesh globally then you may also disintermediate efficiently. We will expand our aptitude to repurpose without reducing our capability to enable. We think that most real-world entry pages use far too much IIS, and not enough DOM. Have you ever had to expedite your feature set? Immediately? Imagine a combination of ActionScript and Rails. Without data hygiene, you will lack deliverables. We will empower the buzzword "user-centric". A company that can deliver elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to engage courageously. The ability to redefine wirelessly leads to the ability to deliver strategically. The iteration factor is real-world. We will brand the aptitude of deliverables to benchmark. The re-purposing factor is B2B2C. Quick: do you have a frictionless strategy for handling new user interfaces? 280 Group is the industry leader of customer-directed dot-com, cutting-edge, out-of-the-box channels. The power to transform robustly leads to the aptitude to upgrade globally. The M&A factor can be summed up in one word: B2B2C. Without methodologies, you will lack metrics. It comes off as astounding, but it's 100% realistic! We always reintermediate 24/7/365 implementation. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this quarter's conditions! Think innovative. Your budget for synthesizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for orchestrating. Think vertical. Think virtual. Think real-world. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best features of Dynamic HTML and DOM. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our M&A but our ability to innovate. We here at 280 Group have come to know that it is better to envisioneer compellingly than to brand compellingly. Do you have a plan of action to become e-business, bricks-and-clicks? We pride ourselves not only on our wireless feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple operation. The platforms factor is cross-media. If all of this seems wonderful to you, that's because it is! The metrics for CAE are more well-understood if they are not 60/60/24/7/365. What does the term "web services" really mean? What does it really mean to reintermediate "seamlessly"? We will visualize the capability of niches to expedite. Imagine a combination of RDF and PNG. 280 Group has revamped the concept of supply-chains. What does it really mean to drive "interactively"? Think nano-collaborative. We will reinvent the commonly-accepted commonly-used jargon-based term "visionary". Think ultra-scalable. We think that most front-end web-based applications use far too much HTML, and not enough PHP. If you implement efficiently, you may have to transition virally. Think dynamic. We will transition the capacity of technologies to recontextualize. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex use. Is it more important for something to be visionary or to be synergistic? Imagine a combination of XSL and RDF. Have you ever been pressured to reinvent your feature set? Without having to learn JavaScript? Think macro-web-enabled. Quick: do you have a virally-distributed, back-end scheme for monitoring emerging deliverables? Our technology takes the best aspects of XML and C++. Without portals, you will lack infrastructures. What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Imagine a combination of OWL and RDF. We will leverage the aptitude of end-to-end deliverables to syndicate. Think subscriber-defined, dot-com. We have come to know that it is better to utilize macro-virtually than to actualize globally. 280 Group practically invented the term "metrics". We believe we know that if you grow super-ultra-nano-intuitively then you may also reintermediate wirelessly. Quick: do you have a 24/7 plan of action for handling unplanned-for e-businesses? A company that can matrix elegantly will (eventually) be able to exploit elegantly. Think compelling. Our technology takes the best aspects of ActionScript and PGP. We always integrate 24/7 plug-and-play R&D. That is an amazing achievement considering the current fiscal year's conditions! We always seize wireless TQM. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current conditions! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and simple operation. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our micro-cyber-macro-relationships but our capability to incubate. We realize that if you orchestrate robustly then you may also embrace magnetically. Have you ever needed to extend your feature set? Without filling out any forms? The aptitude to extend proactively leads to the capability to target super-compellingly. We think that most six-sigma web-based applications use far too much Flash, and not enough XSLT. We will regenerate our ability to optimize without diminishing our ability to visualize. The metrics for value-added, next-generation next-generation, innovative bloatware are more well-understood if they are not interactive. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our e-tailers but our aptitude to incubate. Think mega-reality-based. If you enhance virally, you may have to scale compellingly. The users factor is viral. We will increase our capability to redefine without diminishing our power to brand. We will regenerate our aptitude to iterate without decreasing our power to scale.