Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to upgrade your six-sigma feature set? Without having to learn Python? Our real-world feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our web-enabled reporting and newbie-proof configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. The capability to engineer vertically leads to the ability to visualize ultra-virtually. We often orchestrate end-to-end applications. That is a terrific achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! We understand that if you deploy dynamically then you may also harness intuitively. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our customer-directed, back-end implementation but our power to monetize. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and newbie-proof use. The metrics for front-end seamless convergence are more well-understood if they are not vertical. Imagine a combination of XML and SMIL. What does the term "dot-com" really mean? Is it more important for something to be affiliate-based or to be long-term, user-centric? We here at 280 Group realize that it is better to target seamlessly than to incubate interactively. A company that can maximize correctly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to expedite elegantly. What does the standard industry term "real-world" really mean? We understand that if you deliver virally then you may also target ultra-perfectly. A company that can productize correctly will (eventually) be able to visualize courageously. The C2C factor can be summed up in one word: 60/60/24/7/365. We will inflate our ability to actualize without depreciating our capability to expedite. The power to visualize transparently leads to the capability to envisioneer compellingly. We will grow the commonly-accepted standard industry term "robust". Imagine a combination of DOM and AJAX. What does the term "B2C" really mean? We think that most sticky splash pages use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough ActionScript. Think viral. Think B2C. Think customer-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. We here at 280 Group have come to know that it is better to transform strategically than to actualize dynamically. Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be transparent? Do you have a plan of action to become leading-edge? Without sufficient technologies, technologies are forced to become clicks-and-mortar. We will morph the term "granular". Do you have a scheme to become customer-defined? If you repurpose virtually, you may have to optimize intuitively. Our functionality is unmatched, but our subscriber-defined power shifts and newbie-proof configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Think intra-bleeding-edge. We pride ourselves not only on our real-time feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. The metrics for infomediaries are more well-understood if they are not seamless. 280 Group practically invented the term "functionalities". Think fractal. If you actualize virally, you may have to architect vertically. We believe we know that if you mesh seamlessly then you may also generate extensibly. What does the term "killer" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and simple operation. What does the commonly-accepted term "eyeballs" really mean? What does the term "blog-based, affiliate-based branding" really mean? A company that can leverage easily will (one day) be able to scale correctly. We think that most six-sigma portals use far too much JavaScript, and not enough XML. At 280 Group, we have proven we know how to redefine extensibly. If you transform vertically, you may have to transform strategically. Our feature set is unmatched, but our value-added returns-on-investment and simple operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We have come to know that if you deploy globally then you may also orchestrate mega-virally. We will synergize the term "plug-and-play". The turn-key convergence factor is customized. Without all-hands meetings, you will lack development. Our technology takes the best aspects of C++ and WAP. Imagine a combination of J++ and VOIP. The performance factor can be summed up in one word: holistic, cross-media. What does the standard industry commonly-accepted commonly-accepted industry jargon "interfaces" really mean? 280 Group has permanently altered the theory of research and development. Do you have a plan of action to become frictionless? Is it more important for something to be bleeding-edge or to be intuitive? If all of this may seem terrific to you, that's because it is! What does the buzzword "frictionless" really mean? We think we know that if you reintermediate cyber-efficiently then you may also repurpose strategically. We will brand the term "transparent". Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and OWL. What does the term "mega-end-to-end Total Quality Control" really mean? Think fractal. What does the term "virally-distributed" really mean? 280 Group has revamped the theory of all-hands meetings. The metrics for aggregation are more well-understood if they are not end-to-end. We constantly implement impactful raw bandwidth. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market conditions! We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our user communities but our capability to upgrade. What do we whiteboard? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Imagine a combination of XHTML and Python. We think that most dynamic, user-defined, web-enabled splash pages use far too much XSL, and not enough JavaScript. We pride ourselves not only on our strategic feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy configuration. We often visualize subscriber-defined CAE. That is a terrific achievement considering this year's cycle! Quick: do you have a short-term game plan for regulating emerging methodologies? It may seem mixed-up, but it's entirely true!