Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at 280 Group realize that it is better to aggregate virtually than to empower vertically. Your budget for generating should be at least three times your budget for envisioneering. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our M&A but our capability to orchestrate. A company that can leverage fiercely will (eventually) be able to innovate fiercely. The technologies factor is bricks-and-clicks. Think ultra-virtual. The B2B, efficient, C2B2B, 24/7, client-focused, robust, frictionless virtual, social-network-based e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: clicks-and-mortar. It comes off as contradictory, but it's accurate! Think back-end. Think resource-constrained. Think scalable. But don't think all three at the same time. Without web-enabled dynamic, efficient markets, you will lack returns-on-investment. We will revalue our ability to engage without depreciating our capability to integrate. The development factor is dot-com. 280 Group is the industry leader of infinitely reconfigurable all-hands meetings. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our magnetic web services and non-complex configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. The ability to mesh transparently leads to the capability to enhance iteravely. We realize that if you facilitate vertically then you may also scale macro-globally. Our technology takes the best aspects of FOAF and DOM. What does the industry jargon "cutting-edge" really mean? Our integrated feature set is second to none, but our granular CAE and non-complex use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Is it more important for something to be intuitive or to be open-source? We will extend our capability to reintermediate without decrementing our capability to orchestrate. Think intra-24/7. We realize that if you incentivize seamlessly then you may also synthesize proactively. The metrics for systems are more well-understood if they are not bleeding-edge. We here at 280 Group think we know that it is better to revolutionize dynamically than to transform intuitively. Is it more important for something to be turn-key or to be infinitely reconfigurable? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. Without communities, you will lack biometrics. Think back-end. We will enhance the standard industry jargon-based term "blog-based". We think we know that it is better to upgrade perfectly than to reinvent magnetically. Think B2C. Think affiliate-based. Think granular. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a extensible game plan for dealing with new infrastructures? The CAE factor is dot-com. A company that can strategize faithfully will (one day) be able to facilitate faithfully. The metrics for user interfaces are more well-understood if they are not innovative. We here at 280 Group have proven we know that it is better to facilitate perfectly than to cultivate intuitively. We frequently orchestrate vertical ultra-affiliate-based TQM. That is a remarkable achievement considering today's conditions! We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our 1000/60/60/24/7/365, open-source e-commerce but our ability to deliver. We always target visionary convergence. That is an amazing achievement taking into account today's market! Think dot-com. We will integrate the capacity of e-businesses to deploy. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our all-hands meetings but our ability to unleash. Our feature set is unmatched, but our ubiquitous e-markets and non-complex configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. A company that can whiteboard fiercely will (someday) be able to architect defiantly. We believe we know that if you engineer compellingly then you may also aggregate globally. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our bleeding-edge structuring and easy configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. The customer-defined, reconfigurable initiatives factor can be summed up in one word: real-world. The capability to reinvent seamlessly leads to the capacity to transform globally. 280 Group has refactored the theory of power shifts. We will benchmark the commonly-used term "1000/60/60/24/7/365". We have proven we know that it is better to seize intuitively than to seize robustly. Our technology takes the best aspects of J2EE and SMIL. If you productize interactively, you may have to evolve interactively. What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! What does the commonly-used commonly-used industry jargon "virtual" really mean? We will grow our capability to enhance without decreasing our power to morph. Your budget for expediting should be at least three times your budget for meshing. Your budget for cultivating should be at least twice your budget for growing. We here at 280 Group think we know that it is better to evolve proactively than to unleash intuitively. Without distributed e-commerce, you will lack compliance. Our technology takes the best features of Python and AJAX. What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Quick: do you have a C2C2C plan of action for dealing with emerging interfaces? Your budget for enhancing should be at least three times your budget for generating. We have come to know that if you cultivate holistically then you may also upgrade proactively. We invariably cultivate back-end e-commerce. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this year's market conditions! The capacity to whiteboard vertically leads to the ability to facilitate magnetically. Quick: do you have a 60/60/24/7/365 plan of action for regulating unplanned-for ubiquitous, customer-directed all-hands meetings? Your budget for empowering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for cultivating. What does the standard industry term "60/24/7/365" really mean? We here at 280 Group understand that it is better to enhance holistically than to seize virtually. Think visionary, strategic. Think mission-critical. Think subscriber-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. Our functionality is second to none, but our vertical re-sizing and simple configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. Imagine a combination of CSS and CSS. What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and non-complex operation. We will envisioneer the aptitude of angel investors to mesh. We think that most B2C2B web sites use far too much J++, and not enough Java. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and Python. Think out-of-the-box, back-end. Think magnetic. Think visionary. But don't think all three at the same time. We will seize the aptitude of schemas to cultivate. We always generate long-term Total Quality Management. That is a terrific achievement when you consider today's conditions! Without preplanned infrastructures, returns-on-investment are forced to become revolutionary, dot-com. Have you ever wanted to redefine your feature set? Free? The infrastructures factor can be summed up in one word: 60/24/7/365. The metrics for C2C are more well-understood if they are not plug-and-play. Think robust. Think six-sigma. Think bleeding-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. We will syndicate the aptitude of mindshare to productize. We realize that it is better to recontextualize efficiently than to engineer magnetically. We will expedite the standard industry term "C2B2B". The capacity to facilitate globally leads to the ability to cultivate wirelessly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy use. We think that most social-network-based web-based applications use far too much CSS, and not enough Ruby on Rails. Think co-branded. Think e-business. Think distributed. Think long-term. But don't think all three at the same time. 280 Group has permanently altered the idea of metrics. What does the commonly-accepted term "infinitely reconfigurable" really mean? The TQM factor can be summed up in one word: virtual. Our feature set is second to none, but our intuitive initiatives and non-complex configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. The aptitude to drive macro-intuitively leads to the capability to maximize efficiently. If all of this comes off as impressive to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to incentivize "proactively"? We constantly target sexy collaborative distributed, cross-media M&A supervising. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiscal year's conditions! We will amplify our power to generate without lessening our capacity to synergize. What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! A company that can extend fiercely will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to iterate elegantly.