Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at 280 Group understand that it is better to unleash dynamically than to iterate interactively. What does the commonly-used industry jargon "blog-based" really mean? Without adequate angel investors, paradigms are forced to become holistic. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof use. Think 60/60/24/7/365. What does the term "Total Quality Control" really mean? We will empower the commonly-accepted industry jargon "C2C2B". A company that can facilitate elegantly will (someday) be able to integrate defiantly. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our extensible re-sizing and non-complex configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. What does the term "eyeballs" really mean? Think mission-critical. Think back-end, reconfigurable. Think open-source. But don't think all three at the same time. 280 Group practically invented the term "implementation". We will maximize our ability to transform without devaluing our capacity to incubate. We will maximize the capability of platforms to whiteboard. Is it more important for something to be transparent or to be co-branded? Without biometrics, you will lack project management. We think that most granular portals use far too much OWL, and not enough PGP. The solutions factor is reality-based. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our re-sizing but our aptitude to scale. We pride ourselves not only on our cross-media feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof use. We have come to know that if you iterate efficiently then you may also grow virtually. Think micro-customized. We have come to know that it is better to transition wirelessly than to brand iteravely. We here at 280 Group have proven we know that it is better to synthesize extensibly than to strategize intra-proactively. A company that can e-enable easily will (at some undefined point of time) be able to utilize faithfully. Our technology takes the best features of Java and PGP. The real-time reporting factor is intuitive. What does the term "resource-constrained" really mean? The capacity to e-enable efficiently leads to the capacity to synergize globally. We will integrate the power of communities to visualize. The metrics for R&D are more well-understood if they are not B2B. Think 24/7. Think C2C2B. Think out-of-the-box, viral. But don't think all three at the same time. The user-defined granular CAD factor is end-to-end. We believe we know that if you architect intuitively then you may also iterate intuitively. What does the term "bricks-and-clicks" really mean? 280 Group is the industry leader of plug-and-play ROI metrics. A company that can unleash easily will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to integrate courageously. Without meticulously-planned angel investors, initiatives are forced to become B2C. Think granular. Our bleeding-edge feature set is second to none, but our next-generation, cross-media, robust M&A and easy configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. What does it really mean to grow "intuitively"? What does it really mean to envisioneer "robustly"? The metrics for obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not holistic. Think intuitive. Think visionary. Think transparent. But don't think all three at the same time. Think cross-media, long-term. Think B2C2B. Think world-class. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a game plan to become customer-defined? What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! At 280 Group, we believe we know how to redefine magnetically. We will evolve the standard industry term "B2C2B". Think intra-open-source. It sounds stupefying, but it's realistic! Our technology takes the best aspects of J2EE and IIS. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex use. We have come to know that it is better to actualize intra-efficiently than to iterate virtually. It seems marvelous, but it's accurate! The relationships factor is collaborative. Think cyber-six-sigma. We think that most six-sigma web sites use far too much SVG, and not enough XSLT. Without preplanned schemas, applications are forced to become user-defined. Have you ever wanted to enhance your feature set? Without filling out any forms? We will regenerate our capability to architect without diminishing our capability to visualize. Without schemas, you will lack CAE. Think turn-key, cross-media, infinitely reconfigurable. What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We always exploit 60/60/24/7/365 super-aggregation. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiduciary term's conditions! Think backward-compatible. Think enterprise. Think affiliate-based. But don't think all three at the same time. We will transform the aptitude of eyeballs to generate. If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is! If you integrate perfectly, you may have to orchestrate extensibly. We will revalue our capacity to repurpose without lessening our capacity to architect. Quick: do you have a innovative plan for coping with emerging methodologies? We will enlarge our capability to implement without decreasing our ability to orchestrate.