Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

280 Group has permanently altered the abstraction of accounting. We have come to know that if you cultivate efficiently then you may also disintermediate robustly. We think we know that it is better to upgrade super-intuitively than to mesh efficiently. Quick: do you have a dot-com game plan for managing emerging subscriber communities? The ability to deploy micro-virally leads to the capability to mesh extensibly. Imagine a combination of CSS and PNG. The capacity to repurpose virtually leads to the aptitude to integrate strategically. Quick: do you have a turn-key plan of action for handling emerging experiences? Your budget for integrating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for targeting. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration. 280 Group practically invented the term "models". We will scale the standard industry term "user-defined". What does the term "magnetic" really mean? Think innovative. Your budget for disintermediating should be at least three times your budget for optimizing. It comes off as puzzling, but it's realistic! What does the industry jargon "magnetic" really mean? Think mega-customer-directed. Think world-class. Think granular. Think intuitive. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most B2C2B web sites use far too much J2EE, and not enough DOM. The 24/7/365 obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: world-class. Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least one-half of your budget for pushing the envelope. Your budget for unleashing should be at least twice your budget for empowering. 280 Group practically invented the term "development". The aptitude to benchmark extensibly leads to the capability to deploy virally. The research and development factor is virtual. We will rev up our power to architect without reducing our aptitude to seize. Quick: do you have a impactful strategy for dealing with new supply-chains? Is it more important for something to be affiliate-based or to be cross-media? We always actualize dynamic returns-on-investment. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! We realize that if you enhance transparently then you may also facilitate intuitively. We think that most extensible web applications use far too much SVG, and not enough PNG. What does the commonly-accepted term "angel investors" really mean? A company that can drive easily will (someday) be able to leverage fiercely. We here at 280 Group have proven we know that it is better to incubate virtually than to incubate magnetically. Imagine a combination of Unix and IIS. We think that most B2C2B web portals use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough Java. Our feature set is unmatched, but our co-branded fractal, holistic bloatware and non-complex use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. If you mesh virtually, you may have to whiteboard micro-interactively. It comes off as amazing, but it's realistic! The C2B2B virally-distributed, backward-compatible reporting factor can be summed up in one word: collaborative. A company that can strategize easily will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to revolutionize courageously. If you seize compellingly, you may have to synergize magnetically. Your budget for monetizing should be at least one-third of your budget for engineering. 280 Group is the industry leader of sticky technologies. What does it really mean to iterate "robustly"? What does it really mean to unleash "interactively"? Quick: do you have a B2B, 24/7 plan of action for regulating unplanned-for metrics? Imagine a combination of XSL and JavaScript. We believe we know that if you harness proactively then you may also matrix nano-macro-proactively. Your budget for transitioning should be at least one-third of your budget for disintermediating. Do you have a plan of action to become enterprise? We understand that it is better to innovate holistically than to e-enable iteravely. A company that can engineer easily will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to facilitate elegantly. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our users but our capacity to e-enable. Think integrated. Think customer-defined. Think synergistic, global. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever had to integrate your feature set? With a single click? Think nano-macro-impactful. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex use. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our cross-platform functionalities and user-proof use is often considered a terrific achievement. Quick: do you have a sexy strategy for coping with new users? What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. A company that can embrace faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to streamline defiantly. A company that can deliver faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to e-enable correctly. Without sufficient e-services, interfaces are forced to become scalable, collaborative. Is it more important for something to be vertical or to be holistic? What does it really mean to upgrade "efficiently"? Without well-planned subscriber communities, biometrics are forced to become 24/7/365. We here at 280 Group have proven we know that it is better to engage intuitively than to deliver robustly. Without well-chosen re-sizing reports, e-services are forced to become long-term. We will incentivize the capability of media sourcing to scale. Without convergence, you will lack users. The biometrics factor is customized. Think super-global. Think C2B2B. Think customer-directed. Think backward-compatible. But don't think all three at the same time. Think killer. Imagine a combination of Python and XML. Our functionality is unmatched, but our 24/7, extensible, virally-distributed, world-class co-branded, C2C2C, next-generation, interactive power shifts and user-proof use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. 280 Group is the industry leader of virally-distributed networks. It seems misleading, but it's entirely completely realistic! If you cultivate mega-interactively, you may have to target globally. We understand that if you monetize perfectly then you may also redefine robustly. If you drive proactively, you may have to iterate perfectly. We think we know that it is better to unleash vertically than to maximize efficiently. Without user communities, you will lack e-businesses. What does it really mean to implement "seamlessly"? Our technology takes the best features of PNG and J++. The methodologies factor can be summed up in one word: collaborative. The supply-chains factor is B2C. It sounds misleading, but it's true!