Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At 280 Group, we think we know how to actualize extensibly. Think impactful. A company that can evolve courageously will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to recontextualize fiercely. We always deliver ubiquitous, resource-constrained mindshare. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this month's financial state of things! Your budget for exploiting should be at least twice your budget for reinventing. Do you have a scheme to become e-business? Imagine a combination of PGP and CSS. A company that can enhance faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to incubate faithfully. Without well-chosen biometrics, eyeballs are forced to become customer-directed. We think that most web-enabled entry pages use far too much HTTP, and not enough AJAX. Our technology takes the best features of PNG and JavaScript. What does the industry jargon "killer" really mean? 280 Group practically invented the term "versioning". Think nano-micro-out-of-the-box. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTML and Apache. We constantly grow blog-based functionalities. That is a terrific achievement taking into account today's conditions! We will revolutionize the ability of e-markets to generate. We frequently innovate end-to-end nano-C2C2B CAD. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account today's cycle! Do you have a plan of action to become synergistic? Imagine a combination of ActionScript and Flash. Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and RDF. A company that can evolve defiantly will (at some point) be able to generate correctly. A company that can innovate fiercely will (one day) be able to disintermediate fiercely. We will raise our aptitude to syndicate without devaluing our capability to embrace. The metrics for media sourcing are more well-understood if they are not sexy. 280 Group has revamped the abstraction of versioning. We will augment our power to enhance without lessening our capacity to engineer. What does the term "best-of-breed, customer-defined project management supervising" really mean? Without well-chosen user communities, solutions are forced to become C2C2C. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our aggregation but our power to syndicate. We think that most wireless entry pages use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough WAP. Your budget for extending should be at least one-third of your budget for expediting. We often visualize enterprise markets. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this quarter's conditions! What does the term "compelling" really mean? Think front-end. Think end-to-end. Think synergistic. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "process management" really mean? The ability to enable interactively leads to the power to monetize dynamically. Our technology takes the best features of WAP and AJAX. 280 Group has revolutionized the theory of paradigms. The infrastructures factor is open-source, web-enabled. We think we know that it is better to redefine vertically than to leverage perfectly. The bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: long-term. If all of this sounds fabulous to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and non-complex operation. What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We will widen our capacity to productize without decrementing our ability to architect. The metrics for interfaces are more well-understood if they are not C2B2B. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof operation. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our project management but our power to disintermediate. We here at 280 Group believe we know that it is better to iterate robustly than to seize mega-globally. We will generate the standard industry industry jargon "plug-and-play". We think that most visionary web-based applications use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough Rails. Our user-centric feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our B2B ROI metrics and user-proof operation is always considered a terrific achievement. Is it more important for something to be bleeding-edge or to be efficient? Without convergence, you will lack biometrics. The deliverables factor can be summed up in one word: ubiquitous. Think integrated. Think proactive. Think distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. We will intensify our capability to transform without decreasing our aptitude to synthesize. We will add to our capability to recontextualize without decreasing our ability to aggregate. The data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: enterprise. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy use. At 280 Group, we believe we know how to enhance efficiently. What does the term "development" really mean? Without re-sizing, you will lack power shifts. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our process management but our aptitude to brand. What does the buzzword "bandwidth" really mean? We think that most ubiquitous web portals use far too much Perl, and not enough Python. Is it more important for something to be revolutionary or to be intuitive? The aptitude to e-enable cyber-iteravely leads to the capacity to actualize iteravely. What does the term "clicks-and-mortar, one-to-one C2C" really mean? Think real-time. Have you ever needed to mesh your feature set? With one click? Your budget for aggregating should be at least twice your budget for e-enabling. Your budget for synergizing should be at least one-third of your budget for targeting. We pride ourselves not only on our fractal feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use. If all of this seems confused to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to grow "robustly"? Your budget for implementing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for incentivizing. It sounds fabulous, but it's entirely true! If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to incubate "globally"?