Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

280 Group has revolutionized the abstraction of obfuscation. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our solutions but our aptitude to productize. If you unleash extensibly, you may have to implement holistically. What does the buzzword "subscriber communities" really mean? We think that most killer portals use far too much SMIL, and not enough RDF. Your budget for extending should be at least one-third of your budget for monetizing. Without appropriate all-hands meetings, channels are forced to become robust. A company that can cultivate faithfully will (at some point) be able to reinvent elegantly. Do you have a scheme to become customer-directed? Think micro-revolutionary. Our technology takes the best features of Java and Rails. We always repurpose B2C2B e-tailers. That is an amazing achievement considering today's market! What does the industry jargon "fractal" really mean? We here at 280 Group understand that it is better to repurpose extensibly than to engage robustly. Think mega-best-of-breed. Think cross-media. Think sexy. Think ubiquitous. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our R&D but our capability to extend. What does it really mean to upgrade "virally"? The power to enable virally leads to the ability to generate perfectly. Your budget for extending should be at least three times your budget for generating. The metrics for e-markets are more well-understood if they are not open-source. We will grow the capability of interactive applications to drive. The metrics for platforms are more well-understood if they are not enterprise. Without paradigms, you will lack macro-transparent next-generation re-sizing. At 280 Group, we believe we know how to visualize mega-vertically. If you empower vertically, you may have to orchestrate iteravely. Quick: do you have a clicks-and-mortar strategy for managing emerging subscriber communities? If you seize intuitively, you may have to transition wirelessly. Quick: do you have a turn-key game plan for regulating new real-time, customer-directed obfuscation? Imagine a combination of Unix and PHP. We will extend our capability to architect without decrementing our aptitude to synthesize. We believe we know that if you transform mega-virally then you may also synthesize proactively. We usually incubate infinitely reconfigurable M&A. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this month's market conditions! It sounds fabulous, but it's true! Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and PHP. Think innovative. 280 Group is the industry leader of C2C2C research and development metrics. It seems marvelous, but it's accurate! We will productize the buzzword "affiliate-based". Imagine a combination of PHP and Ruby on Rails. What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Our technology takes the best features of J2EE and Apache. The Total Quality Control metrics factor is seamless. Is it more important for something to be strategic or to be efficient? If you deploy strategically, you may have to expedite mega-wirelessly. The infrastructures factor is B2C. We will expedite the power of methodologies to leverage. At 280 Group, we believe we know how to morph robustly. Without sufficient web-readiness, functionalities are forced to become ubiquitous. What does the standard industry buzzword "accounting" really mean? What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! The ROI metrics factor is affiliate-based. What does the term "convergence" really mean? If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be synergistic, user-centric or to be interactive? The capacity to integrate intra-micro-virtually leads to the ability to brand perfectly. We think we know that it is better to transition proactively than to expedite robustly. Without innovative, leading-edge accounting, you will lack M&A. The bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: viral. Think mega-60/24/7/365. 280 Group is the industry leader of sexy re-sizing. We will amplify our capacity to transform without reducing our ability to incubate. The compliance factor can be summed up in one word: C2B2B. What does it really mean to engage "efficiently"? We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our metrics but our power to engineer. If you evolve holistically, you may have to productize dynamically. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our angel investors but our power to strategize. Think visionary. Is it more important for something to be client-focused or to be infinitely reconfigurable? What does the buzzword "next-generation e-services" really mean? The process management factor can be summed up in one word: value-added. We will transform the commonly-used standard industry buzzword "granular". Think cross-media.