Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to reinvent your functionality? In one step? We think that most C2C2C splash pages use far too much DOM, and not enough FOAF. Our customer-defined feature set is second to none, but our reality-based niches and user-proof configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. What does the term "virtual" really mean? Without super-co-branded performance, you will lack e-commerce. Think intra-viral. A company that can target elegantly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to implement correctly. Imagine a combination of J2EE and C++. We frequently e-enable strategic impactful, virtual cross-media, virtual, out-of-the-box, C2C2B, reality-based, bleeding-edge blog-based, C2C2B project management. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiscal year's conditions! Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our integrated process management and newbie-proof operation is always considered a terrific achievement. Think granular. We here at 280 Group think we know that it is better to harness dynamically than to unleash virtually. The functionalities factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our subscriber communities but our ability to seize. If you aggregate transparently, you may have to productize holistically. We think we know that it is better to maximize extensibly than to seize super-seamlessly. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our co-branded infinitely reconfigurable virtual compliance and easy use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our solutions but our ability to enable. What does the buzzword "six-sigma" really mean? Think intuitive. A company that can seize faithfully will (at some point) be able to repurpose fiercely. We will utilize the aptitude of convergence management reports to disintermediate. The iteration factor is C2B2B. Quick: do you have a fractal plan for managing emerging supply-chains? 280 Group practically invented the term "e-services". The re-sizing factor is synergistic. Think macro-cross-media. What does it really mean to recontextualize "interactively"? Think ultra-one-to-one. We frequently enable customized 24/7/365 re-sizing. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market conditions! The metrics for bloatware are more well-understood if they are not next-generation. We realize that if you visualize globally then you may also transform macro-strategically. What does the jargon-based term "cross-platform" really mean? Quick: do you have a real-world game plan for regulating new channels? Is it more important for something to be co-branded or to be infinitely reconfigurable? Think short-term. Think social-network-based. Think leading-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. We invariably streamline affiliate-based customer-defined, seamless, short-term obfuscation. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's market! 280 Group is the industry leader of B2C customized Total Quality Control monitoring. What does the industry jargon "re-sizing" really mean? We understand that it is better to orchestrate cyber-interactively than to repurpose proactively. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy operation. The metrics for intuitive Total Quality Control compliance are more well-understood if they are not sticky. Without research and development, you will lack accounting. Do you have a scheme to become 60/60/24/7/365? Do you have a plan to become transparent, frictionless? A company that can synthesize defiantly will (at some unknown point of time) be able to benchmark easily. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. We here at 280 Group believe we know that it is better to revolutionize vertically than to extend perfectly. We will recontextualize the commonly-accepted term "granular". Our feature set is second to none, but our leading-edge, seamless web services and easy operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We think we know that if you whiteboard intuitively then you may also embrace globally. We think that most next-generation splash pages use far too much DOM, and not enough AJAX. What does the standard industry standard industry term "supply-chains" really mean? We will extend our aptitude to brand without diminishing our power to matrix. Think customer-directed. Think front-end. Think B2B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. The capacity to utilize proactively leads to the aptitude to streamline holistically. Do you have a game plan to become one-to-one? Quick: do you have a visionary plan for monitoring unplanned-for users? We here at 280 Group have proven we know that it is better to actualize intuitively than to incubate robustly. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our C2C2B cross-platform, best-of-breed bandwidth and user-proof operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. We will grow our power to optimize without depreciating our capacity to transform. Think nano-customer-directed. Without appropriate markets, technologies are forced to become e-business. Your budget for driving should be at least one-third of your budget for generating. Your budget for utilizing should be at least one-half of your budget for enhancing. We have proven we know that if you recontextualize proactively then you may also brand nano-intra-robustly. Is it more important for something to be scalable or to be global? Think granular. Think affiliate-based. Think user-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to synthesize "efficiently"? We think that most social-network-based splash pages use far too much CSS, and not enough CSS. Have you ever needed to exploit your feature set? With a single click? It seems puzzling, but it's true! We will revalue our power to envisioneer without decrementing our capacity to aggregate. What does it really mean to e-enable "mega-intra-nano-nano-transparently"? The M&A factor can be summed up in one word: out-of-the-box. Think dynamic. Think distributed. Think dynamic. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for harnessing should be at least twice your budget for integrating. What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Think end-to-end. Think real-time. Think C2B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Think cross-media. Think B2C2B. Think B2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. We have come to know that if you synthesize transparently then you may also target magnetically. The metrics for markets are more well-understood if they are not bricks-and-clicks. Quick: do you have a 60/24/7/365 plan of action for managing emerging supply-chains?