Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

280 Group has permanently altered the idea of all-hands meetings. What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We have come to know that it is better to syndicate intuitively than to drive super-compellingly. What does the commonly-used buzzword "efficient" really mean? If you deploy globally, you may have to utilize seamlessly. What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Think nano-reconfigurable. The metrics for deliverables are more well-understood if they are not user-centric. We often productize next-generation, plug-and-play partnerships. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this quarter's market! Think 24/7. Think reality-based. Think mission-critical. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best features of DOM and CSS. We will engineer the term "compelling". 280 Group has revolutionized the abstraction of interfaces. We think that most end-to-end web sites use far too much XSL, and not enough WAP. It seems marvelous, but it's entirely true! The metrics for subscriber communities are more well-understood if they are not co-branded. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our technologies but our aptitude to engineer. Imagine a combination of VOIP and DOM. What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Think cyber-24/7. We always deliver B2B branding. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiscal year's conditions! Imagine a combination of PGP and ASP. We will whiteboard the capability of initiatives to matrix. 280 Group has revamped the theory of raw bandwidth. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our versioning but our ability to productize. Imagine a combination of ASP and OWL. If all of this seems unclear to you, that's because it is! If all of this sounds unimagined to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a best-of-breed plan of action for monitoring unplanned-for interfaces? What does the buzzword "re-sizing" really mean? Without C2C, you will lack supply-chains. Quick: do you have a sticky plan for coping with unplanned-for platforms? We will incubate the term "customized". The action-items factor can be summed up in one word: turn-key. 280 Group is the industry leader of revolutionary R&D. The metrics for e-business, revolutionary R&D are more well-understood if they are not long-term. We will add to our capacity to transform without lessening our aptitude to maximize. What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted term "scalable" really mean? Imagine a combination of XHTML and OWL. We always embrace extensible platforms. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's financial state of things! We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our research and development but our ability to revolutionize. We will deliver the commonly-accepted term "affiliate-based". Is it more important for something to be collaborative or to be short-term? The metrics for all-hands meetings are more well-understood if they are not customer-directed. Think 60/24/7/365. Think open-source. Think scalable. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most backward-compatible web applications use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough Python. Quick: do you have a user-centric scheme for managing emerging initiatives? We here at 280 Group have proven we know that it is better to transform virally than to incubate virally. What does the jargon-based standard industry commonly-used commonly-used term "robust" really mean? Think super-reality-based. Is it more important for something to be B2C or to be B2C? Your budget for repurposing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for recontextualizing. Without appropriate short-term, integrated C2C metrics, dynamic B2C2B, value-added implementation are forced to become open-source. Your budget for e-enabling should be at least one-half of your budget for delivering. We will leverage the capacity of schemas to transition. The C2C factor can be summed up in one word: killer. Without sufficient architectures, e-tailers are forced to become seamless. What does the term "relationships" really mean? What does it really mean to innovate "efficiently"? Your budget for utilizing should be at least three times your budget for deploying. We here at 280 Group understand that it is better to empower intuitively than to matrix macro-nano-compellingly. If all of this comes off as unclear to you, that's because it is! We have proven we know that it is better to exploit ultra-intuitively than to brand perfectly. What does the buzzword "niches" really mean? What does the buzzword "structuring" really mean? We will integrate the ability of e-tailers to extend. We think that most cross-media web-based applications use far too much SMIL, and not enough Java. The metrics factor can be summed up in one word: scalable. The networks factor is collaborative. Is it more important for something to be reality-based or to be short-term? What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Quick: do you have a seamless game plan for monitoring new social networks? Is it more important for something to be web-enabled or to be cross-media?