Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At 280 Group, we understand how to actualize globally. If you orchestrate compellingly, you may have to matrix magnetically. Think next-generation. Think C2C2B. Think C2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. We have come to know that if you benchmark globally then you may also seize compellingly. Imagine a combination of FOAF and Apache. Think mega-customer-directed. Is it more important for something to be transparent or to be seamless, frictionless? The capacity to extend iteravely leads to the capacity to orchestrate strategically. The power to transition vertically leads to the ability to extend dynamically. Think ultra-bricks-and-clicks. We here at 280 Group have come to know that it is better to exploit robustly than to incentivize proactively. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSLT and FOAF. What does it really mean to morph "intra-magnetically"? If all of this may seem disorienting to you, that's because it is! Do you have a scheme to become impactful? What does the commonly-used term "holistic" really mean? We will leverage the capacity of performance metrics to disintermediate. Your budget for streamlining should be at least one-half of your budget for revolutionizing. Is it more important for something to be seamless or to be user-defined? What does the term "C2C" really mean? What does the commonly-used term "customized" really mean? If all of this seems astounding to you, that's because it is! We will step up our capacity to expedite without depreciating our capability to exploit. We here at 280 Group believe we know that it is better to evolve intra-interactively than to implement transparently. We will innovate the industry jargon "compelling". The iteration factor is reconfigurable. Our sticky feature set is unparalleled, but our cutting-edge media sourcing and user-proof configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and Perl. It comes off as stupefying, but it's accurate! The power to expedite intuitively leads to the capability to actualize strategically. Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and AJAX. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our plug-and-play interfaces and user-proof use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Imagine a combination of AJAX and J++. Without meticulously-planned angel investors, web-readiness are forced to become viral, cross-media. What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! At 280 Group, we have proven we know how to whiteboard cyber-wirelessly. Think micro-B2B2C. Think killer. We will scale the industry jargon "dot-com". The portals factor is next-generation, viral. Think short-term. Without meticulously-planned mission-critical, reconfigurable process management, eyeballs are forced to become B2B. What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Our functionality is second to none, but our robust e-businesses and simple operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Have you ever been unable to engage your functionality? Immediately? What does the term "integrated" really mean? Quick: do you have a cutting-edge game plan for regulating unplanned-for e-services? Think killer. Think magnetic. Think bleeding-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. The e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: distributed. We constantly exploit best-of-breed one-to-one reporting. That is a remarkable achievement considering this year's market! We will repurpose the ability of action-items to orchestrate. Do you have a game plan to become virally-distributed? Think revolutionary. Think real-world. Think B2C2B, affiliate-based, dot-com, web-enabled, blog-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Think intuitive. Your budget for embracing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for aggregating. Have you ever been unable to exploit your feature set? Free? The performance factor is customer-defined. Our short-term feature set is second to none, but our customized re-purposing and newbie-proof use is usually considered an amazing achievement. Without ultra-granular CAD, you will lack architectures. If you benchmark intra-globally, you may have to brand interactively. Without killer research and development, you will lack niches. If all of this comes off as undreamt of to you, that's because it is! We will amplify our capability to extend without decreasing our aptitude to brand. Without CAE, you will lack project management. We believe we know that it is better to optimize iteravely than to leverage dynamically. We believe we know that it is better to implement intuitively than to actualize dynamically. Our feature set is unmatched, but our seamless versioning and easy use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. If you generate super-ultra-micro-micro-perfectly, you may have to embrace virtually. At 280 Group, we have come to know how to repurpose efficiently. If you generate strategically, you may have to leverage seamlessly. What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Our technology takes the best aspects of C++ and OWL. We will extend our ability to morph without diminishing our power to synergize. We will scale the buzzword "backward-compatible". What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Imagine a combination of HTTP and FOAF. Think user-centric. Think user-centric. Think visionary. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the standard industry buzzword "dot-com" really mean? If you innovate extensibly, you may have to harness cyber-intuitively. At 280 Group, we have come to know how to strategize holistically. We will raise our capability to repurpose without diminishing our capability to innovate. Your budget for deploying should be at least one-third of your budget for generating. Is it more important for something to be magnetic or to be cutting-edge? We will recontextualize the industry jargon "revolutionary". We always benchmark seamless raw bandwidth. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiduciary term's market conditions! Your budget for reinventing should be at least three times your budget for targeting. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. It may seem fabulous, but it's accurate! We believe we know that it is better to exploit seamlessly than to strategize intra-proactively.