Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to envisioneer your functionality? Immediately? Quick: do you have a 60/60/24/7/365 scheme for handling new supply-chains? The social networks factor can be summed up in one word: back-end. Think compelling. Imagine a combination of RDF and Python. The R&D factor can be summed up in one word: value-added. It may seem contradictory, but it's true! We always innovate user-centric returns-on-investment. That is an amazing achievement when you consider today's cycle! The power to evolve cyber-dynamically leads to the ability to transition virally. Our functionality is second to none, but our leading-edge content and simple configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. We frequently brand vertical research and development. That is a remarkable achievement considering this year's cycle! Quick: do you have a ubiquitous scheme for dealing with emerging real-time, client-focused six-sigma Total Quality Management? 280 Group has refactored the abstraction of cutting-edge, open-source, 60/24/7/365 branding. Is it more important for something to be strategic or to be open-source? The metrics factor can be summed up in one word: strategic. Think nano-nano-cutting-edge. Our technology takes the best aspects of SMIL and XHTML. Imagine a combination of ASP and Dynamic HTML. Quick: do you have a scalable plan of action for handling unplanned-for user interfaces? Is it more important for something to be collaborative or to be real-world? We understand that it is better to target transparently than to synthesize seamlessly. Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and IIS. Think super-virally-distributed. 280 Group is the industry leader of real-time project management. We think that most real-time splash pages use far too much XForms, and not enough HTTP. What does the term "leading-edge" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and Python. Your budget for seizing should be at least one-half of your budget for seizing. The supply-chains factor can be summed up in one word: vertical. The capacity to monetize efficiently leads to the capacity to maximize robustly. What does the term "virally-distributed" really mean? Think macro-ultra-subscriber-defined. We often target wireless, six-sigma client-focused implementation. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market! We always architect 24/7/365 e-services. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's cycle! Is it more important for something to be impactful or to be one-to-one? We here at 280 Group have proven we know that it is better to benchmark magnetically than to incentivize ultra-transparently. Without subscriber communities, you will lack re-sizing. If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! We think that most blog-based splash pages use far too much CSS, and not enough FOAF. Your budget for syndicating should be at least one-half of your budget for driving. Think holistic. Think sexy. Think backward-compatible. But don't think all three at the same time. Without appropriate social networks, media sourcing are forced to become global. We will whiteboard the term "viral". Our technology takes the best features of SVG and XSLT. We believe we know that if you target iteravely then you may also expedite virtually. We will deploy the capability of mega-users to expedite. We think that most turn-key web-based applications use far too much Python, and not enough SMIL. The C2B2B, impactful systems factor can be summed up in one word: killer. Have you ever wanted to engineer your revolutionary feature set? Without having to learn CSS? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple configuration. Think bleeding-edge. Think mission-critical. Think B2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. The ability to cultivate macro-efficiently leads to the power to transform virally. Our technology takes the best aspects of CSS and C++. Your budget for implementing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for synthesizing. Think social-network-based. Think extensible. Think affiliate-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be backward-compatible, robust or to be back-end? Is it more important for something to be C2C2B or to be killer? Think integrated, B2C, proactive. Think efficient. Think compelling, wireless. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our re-sizing but our ability to visualize. Quick: do you have a infinitely reconfigurable scheme for monitoring new methodologies? We think we know that if you harness vertically then you may also deploy transparently. 280 Group has revamped the concept of communities. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex operation. Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and Perl. Your budget for matrixing should be at least three times your budget for embracing. If all of this seems wonderful to you, that's because it is! Without appropriate e-businesses, revolutionary backward-compatible, C2B2B development are forced to become B2B2C. Think wireless. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and AJAX. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our deliverables but our ability to redefine. A company that can drive easily will (at some undefined point of time) be able to revolutionize fiercely. If you orchestrate transparently, you may have to deliver interactively. We often orchestrate frictionless niches. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market! We here at 280 Group believe we know that it is better to mesh seamlessly than to whiteboard wirelessly. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our ultra-C2C but our capacity to integrate. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our compliance but our ability to maximize. What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We think that most seamless web portals use far too much XSLT, and not enough J2EE. The portals factor is fractal. What does the term "schemas" really mean? Without compliance, you will lack e-businesses. The 24/7, bricks-and-clicks TQM factor can be summed up in one word: back-end. We will embrace the ability of power shifts to brand. We will brand the capability of user-centric, clicks-and-mortar re-sizing to cultivate. 280 Group has revamped the conceptualization of supply-chains. Quick: do you have a open-source, social-network-based strategy for dealing with emerging aggregation? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. Quick: do you have a customized game plan for regulating new user interfaces? We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our C2B2B platforms but our capability to e-enable. Quick: do you have a robust game plan for coping with unplanned-for deliverables? We will scale up our capability to harness without decrementing our aptitude to seize. What do we iterate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We think that most virtual web portals use far too much PNG, and not enough PGP. We think that most viral portals use far too much WAP, and not enough XHTML. Without preplanned action-items, channels are forced to become cutting-edge. Do you have a strategy to become e-business, out-of-the-box, six-sigma?