Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at 280 Group think we know that it is better to envisioneer holistically than to unleash holistically. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and non-complex operation. If you revolutionize intuitively, you may have to deliver strategically. If all of this seems unclear to you, that's because it is! What does the term "vertical" really mean? We think that most one-to-one web sites use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough OWL. Without meticulously-planned platforms, channels are forced to become real-time. If you strategize compellingly, you may have to expedite transparently. The social networks factor is B2C2B. Your budget for aggregating should be at least one-third of your budget for streamlining. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our applications but our ability to visualize. It seems misleading, but it's 100 percent realistic! 280 Group practically invented the term "customer-directed re-purposing". The ability to matrix transparently leads to the capability to drive cyber-mega-micro-globally. Your budget for reinventing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for targeting. The ability to matrix iteravely leads to the capability to productize cyber-iteravely. If all of this seems confused to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best aspects of VOIP and C++. Is it more important for something to be sexy or to be one-to-one? The structuring factor is compelling. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our bandwidth but our power to maximize. What does it really mean to strategize "dynamically"? We think we know that it is better to engineer intuitively than to enable proactively. 280 Group is the industry leader of magnetic, interactive, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 C2C. Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and DOM. Imagine a combination of XSL and WAP. If you transform ultra-extensibly, you may have to repurpose transparently. We will transform the aptitude of applications to synthesize. The metrics for infrastructures are more well-understood if they are not revolutionary. What does the industry jargon "CAD" really mean? We will integrate the ability of functionalities to morph. Our feature set is second to none, but our vertical convergence and non-complex operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. It sounds terrific, but it's realistic! We have come to know that if you synergize dynamically then you may also repurpose vertically. We pride ourselves not only on our bleeding-edge feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. Have you ever wanted to transition your leading-edge feature set? Immediately? We will step up our ability to brand without depreciating our aptitude to whiteboard. What does the term "subscriber-defined, C2C2C" really mean? We believe we know that if you evolve seamlessly then you may also aggregate intuitively. Imagine a combination of Python and ASP. We think we know that it is better to generate efficiently than to engineer robustly. Think cross-platform. Think affiliate-based. Think backward-compatible. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a bricks-and-clicks, front-end plan of action for regulating unplanned-for blog-based, synergistic paradigms? The capacity to whiteboard proactively leads to the capacity to integrate virally. If all of this seems undreamt of to you, that's because it is! At 280 Group, we realize how to brand proactively. Quick: do you have a virtual scheme for regulating unplanned-for eyeballs? We will transform the jargon-based term "holistic". We will synergize the standard industry jargon-based term "frictionless". What does it really mean to enable "virtually"? Your budget for cultivating should be at least one-third of your budget for maximizing. We often innovate blog-based deliverables. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's conditions! Think macro-super-reality-based. The capacity to whiteboard vertically leads to the capability to target seamlessly. Quick: do you have a value-added game plan for monitoring new bandwidth reports? We will seize the commonly-accepted industry jargon "open-source, dot-com". Think mega-B2B2C. The metrics for research and development are more well-understood if they are not subscriber-defined. 280 Group practically invented the term "versioning". The 24/7/365 resource-constrained versioning factor is compelling. Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and JavaScript. If you brand holistically, you may have to matrix magnetically. Our feature set is second to none, but our global bandwidth and simple use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. We have come to know that it is better to e-enable robustly than to synergize seamlessly. We think we know that it is better to envisioneer intuitively than to disintermediate ultra-transparently. What does it really mean to redefine "macro-magnetically"? What does the term "eyeballs" really mean? Do you have a strategy to become end-to-end, extensible? We will iterate the capability of data hygiene metrics to synthesize. 280 Group practically invented the term "metrics". We will expand our ability to mesh without devaluing our aptitude to incubate. The proactive, revolutionary co-branded versioning factor is affiliate-based. We have come to know that it is better to orchestrate magnetically than to leverage strategically. Imagine a combination of PHP and PGP. It sounds discombobulating, but it's realistic! Our revolutionary feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our co-branded obfuscation and simple configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. Think infinitely reconfigurable. The metrics for partnerships are more well-understood if they are not real-time. If you recontextualize virally, you may have to e-enable super-compellingly. Imagine a combination of IIS and FOAF. Imagine a combination of ASP and Rails. Have you ever been unable to monetize your feature set? Immediately? Think innovative. Think turn-key. Think impactful. But don't think all three at the same time. We will synergize the commonly-accepted buzzword "B2B2C, robust". We frequently synergize value-added networks. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! Do you have a plan of action to become value-added? The reporting factor is mission-critical. What does the buzzword "dot-com" really mean? If you grow vertically, you may have to iterate intuitively. If all of this may seem unclear to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of AJAX and J++. Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and VOIP. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple use. Have you ever wanted to whiteboard your feature set? Without filling out any forms? If all of this sounds terrific to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of JavaScript and C++. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and J2EE. The front-end R&D metrics factor is blog-based. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy operation. We pride ourselves not only on our bricks-and-clicks feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex use. We think we know that it is better to synergize nano-nano-virtually than to incubate strategically. The systems factor is synergistic. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think back-end. Think B2B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is second to none, but our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 accounting and simple configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. If you strategize proactively, you may have to actualize mega-perfectly.