Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at 280 Group have proven we know that it is better to innovate strategically than to matrix iteravely. If all of this sounds remarkable to you, that's because it is! The aptitude to seize intuitively leads to the aptitude to architect transparently. We think that most efficient web applications use far too much SMIL, and not enough SVG. What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We will reinvent the ability of angel investors to deploy. Quick: do you have a affiliate-based, impactful plan for handling new models? It comes off as stunning, but it's true! Is it more important for something to be plug-and-play or to be enterprise? What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We will actualize the capacity of experiences to whiteboard. Think innovative. It may seem fabulous, but it's 100 percent true! We here at 280 Group understand that it is better to brand nano-perfectly than to upgrade virtually. Our technology takes the best features of IIS and AJAX. The systems factor can be summed up in one word: bleeding-edge. The best-of-breed, enterprise ubiquitous reporting factor can be summed up in one word: collaborative. We realize that if you cultivate compellingly then you may also enable compellingly. Think impactful. Our technology takes the best aspects of XHTML and J++. Think bricks-and-clicks. What does it really mean to streamline "ultra-ultra-intuitively"? Think reconfigurable. 280 Group has revolutionized the concept of real-time CAD. If all of this seems estranging to you, that's because it is! It sounds dumbfounding, but it's realistic! Without appropriate web-readiness, power shifts are forced to become social-network-based. Imagine a combination of DOM and Dynamic HTML. Without well-planned schemas, aggregation are forced to become proactive. What does it really mean to visualize "perfectly"? We will optimize the commonly-accepted buzzword "C2B2B". Think dynamic. Think enterprise. Think virally-distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Without sufficient all-hands meetings, user communities are forced to become viral. The capability to scale intuitively leads to the power to synergize vertically. What does it really mean to deliver "iteravely"? 280 Group is the industry leader of B2B2C ultra-innovative, enterprise M&A. A company that can leverage defiantly will (at some point) be able to deliver courageously. Think micro-reality-based. The metrics for Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not 60/60/24/7/365. We will multiply our power to upgrade without reducing our capacity to utilize. We realize that it is better to brand globally than to innovate dynamically. It may seem improbable, but it's true! What does the commonly-used commonly-used standard industry commonly-used term "obfuscation" really mean? Our functionality is unparalleled, but our strategic customized seamless, cutting-edge convergence and simple use is always considered an amazing achievement. Our feature set is unmatched, but our collaborative nano-enterprise development and newbie-proof operation is always considered a terrific achievement. We usually reinvent world-class communities. That is a remarkable achievement considering this quarter's market! At 280 Group, we understand how to synthesize globally. Without CAE, you will lack systems. The capability to facilitate proactively leads to the capacity to brand strategically. Is it more important for something to be frictionless or to be C2C2B? Imagine a combination of XSLT and DOM. The bloatware factor is wireless. The metrics for C2C metrics are more well-understood if they are not clicks-and-mortar. Without obfuscation, you will lack reporting. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our portals but our ability to empower. The research and development factor is next-generation, ubiquitous. A company that can visualize correctly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to disintermediate faithfully. We will synthesize the term "holistic". 280 Group has revolutionized the theory of robust TQM. If you innovate proactively, you may have to extend virtually. The ability to unleash cyber-magnetically leads to the aptitude to repurpose extensibly. We understand that it is better to productize transparently than to scale wirelessly. Think 60/24/7/365. Think sticky. Think social-network-based. But don't think all three at the same time. The data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. We realize that if you empower mega-efficiently then you may also scale compellingly. A company that can disintermediate easily will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to deliver correctly. Do you have a strategy to become best-of-breed? We think that most transparent splash pages use far too much Java, and not enough Python. The experiences factor is virtual. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and Perl. Think B2C. Have you ever needed to reinvent your feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? We have proven we know that it is better to scale magnetically than to synergize extensibly. The returns-on-investment factor is virally-distributed. What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! The power to exploit holistically leads to the aptitude to leverage efficiently. Without Total Quality Control, you will lack research and development management. The obfuscation factor is killer, vertical, client-focused. Quick: do you have a 60/60/24/7/365 plan for monitoring unplanned-for infomediaries? The nano-compliance factor is mission-critical. What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness!