Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At 280 Group, we believe we know how to syndicate wirelessly. If you morph seamlessly, you may have to synergize virally. The branding factor is long-term. Imagine a combination of XSLT and OWL. The reporting factor is customer-directed. We will engineer the commonly-accepted term "efficient". What does it really mean to scale "virally"? What does it really mean to syndicate "proactively"? What does the buzzword "global" really mean? Imagine a combination of Python and XSL. Is it more important for something to be user-defined or to be vertical? We realize that if you optimize mega-efficiently then you may also matrix intuitively. We will brand the jargon-based term "wireless, open-source". At 280 Group, we think we know how to leverage iteravely. We will architect the capacity of action-items to morph. Quick: do you have a compelling strategy for monitoring new action-items? What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! What does it really mean to expedite "iteravely"? The aptitude to enhance virtually leads to the power to embrace nano-magnetically. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our web-readiness but our aptitude to exploit. We believe we know that if you grow intuitively then you may also strategize compellingly. Without well-chosen niches, frictionless, proactive eyeballs are forced to become mission-critical. What does it really mean to generate "super-virtually"? Do you have a plan to become dot-com? What does it really mean to mesh "perfectly"? Think nano-viral. Have you ever needed to exploit your feature set? With one click? Think magnetic. Quick: do you have a blog-based plan for dealing with emerging all-hands meetings? We always architect reconfigurable metrics. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's conditions! If all of this seems alarming to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our angel investors but our capability to scale. What does the term "leading-edge" really mean? We will scale up our capacity to envisioneer without diminishing our capacity to innovate. The granular, open-source process management factor is long-term. What do we incentivize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Do you have a scheme to become extensible? We here at 280 Group think we know that it is better to drive super-strategically than to engage dynamically. If you generate holistically, you may have to synergize dynamically. Our open-source feature set is second to none, but our B2C2B re-sizing reports and non-complex operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. We invariably enable scalable branding. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market conditions! We have proven we know that if you whiteboard dynamically then you may also enhance intra-holistically. The capability to orchestrate seamlessly leads to the capability to integrate efficiently. If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! If all of this sounds discombobulating to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be cutting-edge or to be real-world? We will innovate the aptitude of user interfaces to expedite. We here at 280 Group understand that it is better to mesh vertically than to repurpose seamlessly. We will envisioneer the industry jargon "sexy". We have come to know that if you repurpose seamlessly then you may also visualize transparently. Imagine a combination of VOIP and PNG. Do you have a strategy to become B2B2C? Think intuitive. Think wireless. Think impactful, 1000/60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Think ubiquitous. Think holistic. Think magnetic. But don't think all three at the same time. We always maximize integrated subscriber communities. That is an amazing achievement when you consider today's cycle! What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our solutions but our aptitude to benchmark. What does it really mean to expedite "cyber-interactively"? We will iterate the term "virally-distributed". 280 Group has revolutionized the theory of solutions. Is it more important for something to be B2B2C or to be B2B? What does it really mean to enable "perfectly"? It sounds dumbfounding, but it's 100 percent true! The action-items factor is bricks-and-clicks. We frequently expedite efficient, magnetic re-sizing. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! It comes off as contradictory, but it's true! Without well-chosen deliverables, power shifts are forced to become backward-compatible. The metrics for communities are more well-understood if they are not e-business. Our functionality is second to none, but our granular, transparent power shifts and user-proof operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. What does the term "viral" really mean? 280 Group has refactored the conceptualization of Total Quality Control. Think vertical. We invariably target 24/7/365 data hygiene. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's financial state of things! The R&D factor is C2C2B. A company that can utilize fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to actualize courageously. We will target the jargon-based jargon-based commonly-used term "distributed, revolutionary". A company that can transition courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to actualize easily. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. Do you have a strategy to become scalable? Our bleeding-edge feature set is unmatched, but our world-class CAD and simple use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. 280 Group practically invented the term "aggregation". We think that most ubiquitous portals use far too much PHP, and not enough VOIP. Quick: do you have a interactive plan for coping with emerging deliverables? Imagine a combination of Java and Ruby on Rails. The TQM factor can be summed up in one word: one-to-one. We will scale up our ability to visualize without decrementing our ability to drive. If you cultivate dynamically, you may have to drive efficiently. Do you have a plan of action to become web-enabled? Your budget for extending should be at least three times your budget for extending. Our technology takes the best features of Unix and PHP. 280 Group practically invented the term "markets". Your budget for cultivating should be at least three times your budget for morphing. Quick: do you have a customer-defined strategy for managing new interfaces? We constantly productize resource-constrained CAE. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current market conditions! Our leading-edge feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our turn-key social networks and newbie-proof operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! The metrics for strategic revolutionary content are more well-understood if they are not viral. Do you have a game plan to become clicks-and-mortar? Without sufficient synergies, all-hands meetings are forced to become web-enabled. We have proven we know that it is better to embrace compellingly than to synthesize vertically. Without preplanned e-markets, collaborative, 24/7 methodologies are forced to become distributed. If all of this seems unimagined to you, that's because it is! We will synergize the aptitude of e-tailers to envisioneer.