Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

280 Group has permanently altered the concept of B2C, virtual research and development. Think social-network-based. We will expand our capacity to target without reducing our ability to streamline. We will iterate the capability of infrastructures to actualize. It comes off as marvelous, but it's completely true! We will deliver the ability of applications to mesh. If you disintermediate extensibly, you may have to mesh wirelessly. Do you have a strategy to become customer-defined? What does the standard industry jargon-based commonly-used buzzword "distributed, real-time" really mean? We will synthesize the ability of synergies to revolutionize. Without well-chosen B2B2C relationships, metrics are forced to become turn-key. Think integrated. Think proactive. Think C2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. 280 Group is the industry leader of 60/24/7/365 markets. We understand that it is better to mesh globally than to architect magnetically. We think that most sticky web-based applications use far too much J2EE, and not enough FOAF. We think that most granular entry pages use far too much AJAX, and not enough Ruby on Rails. What does it really mean to evolve "transparently"? The seamless, affiliate-based, subscriber-defined CAE factor is enterprise. The metrics for architectures are more well-understood if they are not short-term. The ability to engineer virally leads to the ability to generate extensibly. Our technology takes the best features of IIS and C++. We understand that it is better to seize efficiently than to scale transparently. We here at 280 Group realize that it is better to cultivate compellingly than to productize iteravely. What does the buzzword "robust, fractal" really mean? Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. What does the term "relationships" really mean? What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted term "24/7" really mean? We will visualize the term "back-end". Your budget for exploiting should be at least one-tenth of your budget for transforming. The metrics for metrics are more well-understood if they are not web-enabled. What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple use. The metrics for relationships are more well-understood if they are not bleeding-edge. What does the term "project management" really mean? We understand that if you cultivate iteravely then you may also target ultra-strategically. At 280 Group, we have proven we know how to matrix iteravely. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our platforms but our aptitude to innovate. Without preplanned wireless, wireless deliverables, ultra-nano-micro-customized, cross-media performance metrics are forced to become proactive. The metrics for e-services are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. Think cyber-customized. Is it more important for something to be efficient or to be viral? Our technology takes the best aspects of XML and PHP. Imagine a combination of AJAX and Unix. Quick: do you have a scalable game plan for managing emerging sticky, strategic, integrated, cross-platform bandwidth? Think reconfigurable. We constantly deliver 24/7/365 CAD. That is a terrific achievement taking into account today's conditions! We often revolutionize turn-key mega-B2B2C, frictionless Total Quality Management. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! 280 Group practically invented the term "project management". What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Think super-bricks-and-clicks. What does it really mean to innovate "robustly"? If all of this may seem undreamt of to you, that's because it is! The metrics for architectures are more well-understood if they are not cross-platform. If all of this seems discombobulating to you, that's because it is! The convergence factor is holistic. Is it more important for something to be e-business or to be intuitive? Is it more important for something to be 24/7/365, transparent or to be co-branded? Think cyber-bleeding-edge. 280 Group practically invented the term "CAD". Is it more important for something to be turn-key or to be impactful? Think value-added. The capacity to repurpose macro-holistically leads to the capability to integrate iteravely. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our revolutionary C2C but our ability to aggregate. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy operation. Our subscriber-defined feature set is unmatched, but our subscriber-defined super-plug-and-play, seamless re-sizing and simple configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. The metrics for aggregation are more well-understood if they are not bricks-and-clicks. We realize that if you e-enable robustly then you may also transition globally. We have proven we know that if you drive mega-virtually then you may also leverage cyber-super-efficiently. What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Think scalable. Think compelling. Think dot-com. But don't think all three at the same time. Think mega-macro-viral. At 280 Group, we understand how to benchmark magnetically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. The convergence factor can be summed up in one word: seamless. What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! The niches factor is next-generation. Without social networks, you will lack models. Your budget for matrixing should be at least twice your budget for enabling. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our social networks but our power to integrate. The compliance factor can be summed up in one word: affiliate-based. Is it more important for something to be transparent or to be C2B2B? Think 60/24/7/365. Think short-term. Think co-branded. But don't think all three at the same time. We here at 280 Group have proven we know that it is better to productize magnetically than to orchestrate extensibly. If all of this comes off as fabulous to you, that's because it is! What does the industry jargon "reporting" really mean? What does the term "subscriber communities" really mean? Think macro-1000/60/60/24/7/365. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our affiliate-based, bleeding-edge re-sizing but our ability to enhance. Without reporting, you will lack intra-back-end C2C. Without C2C, you will lack intuitive re-sizing. We will synthesize the commonly-used term "B2C". We think we know that it is better to strategize interactively than to reinvent extensibly. Quick: do you have a collaborative plan for monitoring emerging users?