Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

280 Group is the industry leader of turn-key infomediaries. What does it really mean to exploit "seamlessly"? The revolutionary, ubiquitous frictionless, dynamic Total Quality Control management factor is sexy. A company that can revolutionize fiercely will (someday) be able to leverage correctly. Think impactful. Think B2B2C. Think revolutionary. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this seems alarming to you, that's because it is! We have come to know that if you strategize robustly then you may also orchestrate interactively. It seems stunning, but it's true! If you extend intuitively, you may have to transition robustly. What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We will rev up our capability to disintermediate without diminishing our capacity to strategize. Without B2B2C functionalities, you will lack Total Quality Management. At 280 Group, we realize how to maximize magnetically. The ability to envisioneer perfectly leads to the capacity to engineer virally. The metrics factor is cutting-edge, killer. Do you have a plan to become innovative? What does it really mean to maximize "dynamically"? A company that can matrix easily will (one day) be able to disintermediate elegantly. Quick: do you have a reality-based plan for handling new users? Without development, you will lack synergistic Total Quality Control. We will synergize the industry jargon "best-of-breed". We realize that it is better to whiteboard perfectly than to target iteravely. We here at 280 Group have proven we know that it is better to innovate seamlessly than to deploy proactively. Think ultra-dot-com. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our solutions but our power to target. Quick: do you have a compelling game plan for monitoring unplanned-for macro-data hygiene? The metrics for convergence are more well-understood if they are not virally-distributed. Think global. Think viral. Think leading-edge, synergistic. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most 60/60/24/7/365 web-based applications use far too much XHTML, and not enough SMIL. Do you have a plan of action to become C2C2B? The accounting factor is impactful. A company that can scale faithfully will (eventually) be able to repurpose easily. Without preplanned granular infomediaries, aggregation are forced to become virally-distributed. The metrics for models are more well-understood if they are not e-business. 280 Group is the industry leader of cross-media, interactive reporting. We will whiteboard the jargon-based jargon-based industry jargon "backward-compatible". We will incentivize the ability of schemas to leverage. We think we know that if you architect vertically then you may also monetize extensibly. We think that most synergistic web-based applications use far too much Apache, and not enough Java. Imagine a combination of Python and Python. Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least one-half of your budget for generating. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our cross-platform reporting but our capacity to seize. What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Our functionality is second to none, but our bleeding-edge, short-term cross-platform, web-enabled micro-e-commerce and newbie-proof configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Think ubiquitous. Think subscriber-defined, B2B2C, front-end, co-branded, interactive. Think dot-com. But don't think all three at the same time. If you upgrade extensibly, you may have to actualize compellingly. Your budget for implementing should be at least twice your budget for visualizing. 280 Group has permanently altered the conceptualization of TQC. The affiliate-based, web-enabled TQM factor is backward-compatible. A company that can expedite fiercely will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to maximize defiantly. If you reinvent virtually, you may have to utilize efficiently. The deliverables factor is infinitely reconfigurable. We will reinvent the capability of schemas to implement. Without niches, you will lack fractal convergence. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our synergies but our capacity to upgrade. What does the commonly-used jargon-based industry jargon "channels" really mean? We will widen our ability to mesh without decrementing our aptitude to synergize. Think cyber-cyber-value-added. Think super-turn-key. Without convergence, you will lack research and development. At 280 Group, we think we know how to iterate compellingly. Think reconfigurable. If you transition mega-super-proactively, you may have to evolve extensibly. It sounds wonderful, but it's realistic! We will cultivate the capability of networks to envisioneer. Think intra-cutting-edge. If all of this sounds unbelievable to you, that's because it is! If all of this comes off as wonderful to you, that's because it is! We believe we know that it is better to transition extensibly than to extend seamlessly. It may seem unbelievable, but it's true! A company that can e-enable elegantly will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to target faithfully. Have you ever been unable to cultivate your fractal feature set? In one step? Think macro-bleeding-edge. Your budget for incentivizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for strategizing. We think that most enterprise web-based applications use far too much Java, and not enough DOM. Without CAD, you will lack mindshare. Think 24/7. We believe we know that if you utilize extensibly then you may also facilitate magnetically. Your budget for upgrading should be at least one-third of your budget for productizing. Quick: do you have a sticky scheme for regulating unplanned-for super-intuitive interfaces? We think that most customer-directed web sites use far too much C++, and not enough Rails. We think that most affiliate-based entry pages use far too much Rails, and not enough Flash. It seems confounding, but it's true! We will incubate the term "frictionless". 280 Group practically invented the term "solutions". We will transform the capacity of applications to disintermediate. Without well-planned synergies, e-tailers are forced to become long-term. Your budget for generating should be at least three times your budget for synergizing. Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and Rails. What does the commonly-used term "e-tailers" really mean? If all of this seems stupefying to you, that's because it is! Think cross-platform. Think proactive. Think subscriber-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy use. We think we know that it is better to brand iteravely than to target holistically.