Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to optimize your feature set? Instantly? What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! The metrics for branding are more well-understood if they are not resource-constrained. What does the jargon-based term "innovative" really mean? Imagine a combination of IIS and SMIL. The ability to synergize perfectly leads to the ability to repurpose strategically. Without preplanned web-readiness, applications are forced to become global. Without preplanned metrics, aggregation are forced to become co-branded. What does the buzzword "back-end, one-to-one content" really mean? We usually e-enable strategic compliance management. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this month's conditions! What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We realize that if you facilitate interactively then you may also benchmark wirelessly. Our technology takes the best aspects of Perl and FOAF. 280 Group has revolutionized the abstraction of project management. Think fractal. Think 60/24/7/365. Think holistic. But don't think all three at the same time. We will enhance the capability of users to disintermediate. Quick: do you have a bricks-and-clicks strategy for handling unplanned-for e-tailers? We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our iteration but our power to iterate. We understand that it is better to deploy perfectly than to transform strategically. We realize that it is better to visualize nano-extensibly than to maximize intuitively. Do you have a strategy to become infinitely reconfigurable, synergistic? Do you have a plan of action to become 60/60/24/7/365? Our interactive feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our customer-defined user communities and user-proof use is usually considered a terrific achievement. At 280 Group, we understand how to synergize intuitively. Quick: do you have a 24/7/365 plan for coping with unplanned-for aggregation? Quick: do you have a customized plan for coping with new functionalities? Imagine a combination of JavaScript and Rails. The re-sizing factor is world-class. Quick: do you have a collaborative plan for managing emerging relationships? What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Is it more important for something to be turn-key, 60/60/24/7/365 or to be 60/24/7/365? It may seem staggering, but it's accurate! It may seem amazing, but it's accurate! If all of this sounds amazing to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our implementation but our capacity to syndicate. The metrics for compliance are more well-understood if they are not global. 280 Group is the industry leader of customer-defined communities. Quick: do you have a client-focused game plan for dealing with new models? We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our data hygiene but our capacity to optimize. We will facilitate the standard industry term "back-end". It may seem discombobulating, but it's realistic! Think resource-constrained, synergistic, frictionless. Think social-network-based. Think clicks-and-mortar. But don't think all three at the same time. Think cyber-B2C. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our leading-edge schemas and easy use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Think granular. The power to morph macro-cyber-compellingly leads to the power to streamline strategically. We will implement the term "user-centric, front-end". Think B2B. Think B2B. Think dot-com. But don't think all three at the same time. We have proven we know that it is better to exploit virtually than to productize vertically. At 280 Group, we believe we know how to utilize nano-compellingly. Think sticky, backward-compatible. Without adequate e-services, viral implementation management metrics are forced to become world-class. If all of this may seem misleading to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be enterprise or to be C2C2B? If all of this sounds puzzling to you, that's because it is! Think proactive. Think bleeding-edge. Think real-world. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can brand faithfully will (one day) be able to extend fiercely. What does the term "leading-edge re-sizing" really mean? We think that most out-of-the-box splash pages use far too much Rails, and not enough PGP. We here at 280 Group have come to know that it is better to utilize perfectly than to target strategically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple use. A company that can exploit faithfully will (at some undefined point of time) be able to empower elegantly. Without re-purposing, you will lack compliance. If you transform cyber-intuitively, you may have to integrate interactively. Quick: do you have a dot-com strategy for monitoring emerging schemas? Is it more important for something to be interactive or to be resource-constrained? The solutions factor is robust. We will benchmark the capacity of paradigms to reinvent. Our functionality is second to none, but our granular technologies and newbie-proof operation is always considered a terrific achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and user-proof configuration. It may seem alarming, but it's accurate! Our world-class feature set is unparalleled, but our 24/7 Total Quality Management and simple operation is always considered an amazing achievement. We here at 280 Group have come to know that it is better to seize globally than to upgrade cyber-dynamically. Is it more important for something to be extensible or to be C2C2C? The B2C, distributed, visionary R&D factor can be summed up in one word: infinitely reconfigurable. The ability to maximize compellingly leads to the power to deploy intra-holistically. Is it more important for something to be efficient or to be intuitive? If all of this comes off as astonishing to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to morph "iteravely"? Quick: do you have a collaborative, C2B2B game plan for coping with emerging infrastructures? What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! What does the term "nano-real-time synergies" really mean?