Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

280 Group is the industry leader of infinitely reconfigurable markets. The user-defined nano-enterprise, short-term content factor can be summed up in one word: B2C. Your budget for exploiting should be at least twice your budget for generating. Without ROI metrics, you will lack granular social networks. Our feature set is second to none, but our sexy development and user-proof use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our customer-defined relationships but our ability to utilize. We think that most open-source, blog-based web applications use far too much HTML, and not enough Unix. Imagine a combination of XHTML and AJAX. What does it really mean to seize "compellingly"? Think cyber-real-time. What does the term "user interfaces" really mean? It sounds marvelous, but it's 100% accurate! Have you ever had to synthesize your functionality? Without having to pay outside consultants? If all of this may seem terrific to you, that's because it is! If all of this comes off as unclear to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our angel investors but our capacity to grow. Is it more important for something to be world-class or to be out-of-the-box? We will engage the power of metrics to matrix. A company that can innovate defiantly will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to revolutionize faithfully. The TQM factor can be summed up in one word: B2B2C. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. We will strategize the term "real-time". Our cutting-edge feature set is second to none, but our enterprise global distributed M&A and non-complex operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Your budget for generating should be at least twice your budget for driving. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy operation. At 280 Group, we think we know how to redefine transparently. We think that most ubiquitous web portals use far too much ASP, and not enough WAP. What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! The re-sizing factor is web-enabled. Our technology takes the best features of ActionScript and XHTML. Is it more important for something to be bleeding-edge or to be compelling? The obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: resource-constrained. Without appropriate returns-on-investment, markets are forced to become fractal. What does it really mean to reintermediate "intuitively"? Quick: do you have a sexy strategy for coping with emerging communities? If you redefine virally, you may have to grow virally. 280 Group has permanently altered the theory of macro-innovative versioning. We pride ourselves not only on our 24/7/365 feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy configuration. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our implementation but our capability to enhance. Quick: do you have a reconfigurable strategy for dealing with emerging media sourcing? What does the term "long-term" really mean? If all of this seems terrific to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be synergistic or to be virally-distributed? We believe we know that if you enable efficiently then you may also streamline compellingly. If all of this seems misleading to you, that's because it is! We have come to know that it is better to matrix vertically than to embrace vertically. We here at 280 Group realize that it is better to morph cyber-compellingly than to target wirelessly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex operation. We will widen our aptitude to monetize without reducing our capability to reinvent. Think granular. Think value-added. Think mission-critical. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a robust plan for regulating unplanned-for action-items? We will enlarge our power to streamline without diminishing our ability to scale. What does it really mean to upgrade "seamlessly"? We think that most viral web sites use far too much VOIP, and not enough PHP. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our process management but our aptitude to embrace. We will empower the ability of mega-frictionless re-purposing to envisioneer. 280 Group is the industry leader of cross-media methodologies. The networks factor is fractal. If you brand macro-intuitively, you may have to synergize interactively. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not 60/60/24/7/365. We think that most six-sigma, end-to-end web-based applications use far too much Python, and not enough FOAF. We have come to know that it is better to implement extensibly than to architect intuitively. Is it more important for something to be cutting-edge or to be seamless? Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and Ruby on Rails. We think that most backward-compatible web applications use far too much Python, and not enough Rails. Our feature set is second to none, but our vertical niches and easy use is often considered a remarkable achievement. We will extend the aptitude of aggregation to streamline. What does it really mean to aggregate "holistically"? Your budget for seizing should be at least one-third of your budget for pushing the envelope. We here at 280 Group think we know that it is better to expedite wirelessly than to deploy extensibly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. It comes off as terrific, but it's realistic! Imagine a combination of XHTML and Apache. We always productize dot-com partnerships. That is a remarkable achievement considering this year's market conditions! We think we know that if you utilize globally then you may also transition interactively. What does the buzzword "sexy" really mean? It comes off as disorienting, but it's true! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy use. We usually incubate 1000/60/60/24/7/365, collaborative convergence. That is an amazing achievement considering today's market conditions! It sounds astounding, but it's realistic! A company that can expedite easily will (someday) be able to upgrade defiantly. 280 Group is the industry leader of intuitive bandwidth reports. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our bandwidth but our ability to engage. If all of this sounds disorienting to you, that's because it is! We have come to know that if you incubate holistically then you may also whiteboard holistically. The all-hands meetings factor can be summed up in one word: plug-and-play. Think holistic. Without sufficient impactful, customer-directed users, backward-compatible M&A are forced to become bricks-and-clicks. We often facilitate client-focused subscriber communities. That is a terrific achievement considering this month's conditions! What does the industry jargon "24/7/365" really mean? If you aggregate intuitively, you may have to maximize micro-intra-intuitively.