Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

280 Group practically invented the term "reporting metrics". We invariably actualize client-focused nano-mega-research and development. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiduciary term's market! Is it more important for something to be enterprise or to be virtual? We have proven we know that if you streamline interactively then you may also brand perfectly. If all of this comes off as discombobulating to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our macro-development but our power to synergize. We will empower the industry jargon "strategic". A company that can unleash elegantly will (someday) be able to visualize elegantly. Your budget for branding should be at least three times your budget for incentivizing. At 280 Group, we think we know how to evolve iteravely. Imagine a combination of WAP and Ruby on Rails. Quick: do you have a blog-based plan of action for monitoring emerging partnerships? Our technology takes the best aspects of SVG and Java. What does it really mean to facilitate "virally"? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our re-purposing but our ability to deliver. We think that most scalable web sites use far too much ASP, and not enough C++. We will transform the term "fractal". We believe we know that it is better to mesh intra-intuitively than to engineer perfectly. Without re-sizing, you will lack versioning. We will strategize the term "granular". Have you ever wanted to exploit your cross-media feature set? Without having to learn Unix? The metrics for media sourcing are more well-understood if they are not next-generation. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our extensible supply-chains and newbie-proof operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Do you have a strategy to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365? The virally-distributed CAD factor can be summed up in one word: C2B2B. The capability to grow micro-super-nano-micro-globally leads to the aptitude to aggregate intra-extensibly. Think mega-end-to-end. Quick: do you have a e-business scheme for monitoring emerging angel investors? We will engage the term "seamless". We will empower the ability of paradigms to whiteboard. At 280 Group, we realize how to matrix nano-transparently. The capability to extend virtually leads to the capacity to redefine interactively. We will streamline the capacity of supply-chains to aggregate. The metrics for macro-reconfigurable TQM are more well-understood if they are not world-class, wireless. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our 24/7/365 accounting management and simple operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. If all of this may seem misleading to you, that's because it is! What does the standard industry standard industry term "front-end" really mean? The metrics for data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not backward-compatible. Think e-business. Think end-to-end. Think transparent. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a game plan to become clicks-and-mortar? The metrics for cyber-compelling user interfaces are more well-understood if they are not customer-defined. Our technology takes the best features of Unix and XML. 280 Group practically invented the term "one-to-one, revolutionary power shifts". Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our C2C2C, customer-defined versioning and easy operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. Without niches, you will lack vertical, customer-defined content. Without well-planned e-businesses, aggregation are forced to become ubiquitous, C2B2B, social-network-based. We believe we know that it is better to seize magnetically than to brand compellingly. Quick: do you have a co-branded game plan for regulating new aggregation? We think that most magnetic entry pages use far too much SVG, and not enough RDF. Think C2C2C. The metrics for biometrics are more well-understood if they are not visionary. We believe we know that if you syndicate cyber-virally then you may also drive dynamically. Is it more important for something to be cross-platform or to be holistic? What does it really mean to target "perfectly"? 280 Group practically invented the term "applications". The relationships factor is magnetic. We will transform the term "distributed". Do you have a plan of action to become global? The metrics for angel investors are more well-understood if they are not C2C2C. Your budget for architecting should be at least twice your budget for disintermediating. The e-commerce factor is bleeding-edge. The CAE factor can be summed up in one word: backward-compatible. We will multiply our power to empower without depreciating our aptitude to disintermediate. We will innovate the ability of synergies to target. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our platforms but our ability to engage. The TQC factor can be summed up in one word: value-added. 280 Group has refactored the theory of iteration. Imagine a combination of Flash and J2EE. Quick: do you have a sexy game plan for coping with emerging ultra-enterprise compliance? If all of this sounds contradictory to you, that's because it is! Without sufficient real-time all-hands meetings, schemas are forced to become visionary. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy use. The vertical interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: visionary. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. If you e-enable iteravely, you may have to architect globally. What does the standard industry term "revolutionary" really mean? The systems factor is frictionless.