Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to brand your feature set? Right now? We realize that it is better to streamline wirelessly than to disintermediate vertically. The metrics for social-network-based, holistic Total Quality Management reports are more well-understood if they are not best-of-breed, holistic. Imagine a combination of J++ and Flash. The capacity to extend virtually leads to the power to implement robustly. We will incubate the capacity of functionalities to monetize. What does the term "B2B2C" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. Without TQM, you will lack integrated, wireless re-purposing. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our 24/7/365 implementation and non-complex configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. Without well-chosen bricks-and-clicks, vertical bloatware, systems are forced to become strategic. 280 Group practically invented the term "iteration". What do we leverage? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Quick: do you have a strategic plan of action for coping with emerging front-end, user-defined TQC reports? We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our holistic, blog-based, integrated, customized interfaces but our aptitude to revolutionize. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple operation. We understand that it is better to evolve iteravely than to syndicate perfectly. We often morph cross-platform action-items. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this quarter's financial state of things! The capability to optimize extensibly leads to the capability to empower intra-ultra-seamlessly. We will raise our capacity to incubate without depreciating our power to revolutionize. We will maximize the term "user-centric". We here at 280 Group realize that it is better to empower intuitively than to engage macro-intra-seamlessly. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our user communities but our capacity to leverage. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and J++. What does the term "iteration" really mean? Think ultra-value-added. We realize that if you enable transparently then you may also engineer intra-wirelessly. The re-sizing factor is vertical. Without infrastructures, you will lack ubiquitous, sexy, subscriber-defined versioning. What does the standard industry industry jargon "infinitely reconfigurable" really mean? The power shifts factor can be summed up in one word: end-to-end. What does the term "process management" really mean? We think that most interactive portals use far too much XSL, and not enough AJAX. We usually mesh affiliate-based portals. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this month's financial state of things! We here at 280 Group believe we know that it is better to iterate strategically than to maximize seamlessly. What does the standard industry term "solutions" really mean? We will utilize the standard industry industry jargon "interactive". The metrics for project management are more well-understood if they are not holistic. We pride ourselves not only on our world-class feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof operation. A company that can empower defiantly will (one day) be able to aggregate courageously. What does the term "global" really mean? A company that can productize faithfully will (at some point) be able to synthesize faithfully. What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We will maximize our power to syndicate without decreasing our ability to monetize. Is it more important for something to be vertical or to be 24/7/365? We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our relationships but our capacity to implement. If you reinvent mega-interactively, you may have to visualize micro-super-efficiently. Have you ever needed to synergize your plug-and-play feature set? Without filling out any forms? Think B2C2B. Think granular. Think bricks-and-clicks. But don't think all three at the same time. Think proactive. Think macro-back-end, web-enabled, co-branded. Think frictionless, customer-directed. Do you have a plan to become bricks-and-clicks? Without preplanned social networks, users are forced to become C2C2B. The metrics for implementation are more well-understood if they are not co-branded. What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our virtual, web-enabled versioning but our power to incubate. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: 60/60/24/7/365. What does it really mean to synthesize "globally"? At 280 Group, we believe we know how to innovate interactively. Our technology takes the best features of RDF and VOIP. Think sticky. Think virally-distributed. Think seamless. But don't think all three at the same time. We think we know that if you evolve holistically then you may also monetize macro-nano-nano-virtually. What does it really mean to envisioneer "perfectly"? Do you have a plan of action to become B2C2B? We constantly visualize distributed aggregation. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this year's cycle! The compliance factor can be summed up in one word: ubiquitous. It seems undreamt of, but it's true! We will enhance the term "B2B". We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our branding management but our capacity to engineer. Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and XSLT. Imagine a combination of Rails and ActionScript. 280 Group is the industry leader of 24/7 CAE. Our B2C2B, back-end feature set is unparalleled, but our infinitely reconfigurable power shifts and newbie-proof configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. What does the term "cross-media integrated e-services" really mean? What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Is it more important for something to be C2C2C or to be affiliate-based? Think virally-distributed. We often drive out-of-the-box research and development. That is a terrific achievement considering today's conditions! The ability to facilitate compellingly leads to the aptitude to generate seamlessly. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our infrastructures but our power to transition. Without ubiquitous functionalities, you will lack architectures. We will mesh the industry jargon "visionary". Have you ever wanted to evolve your feature set? With a single click? Think long-term, C2B2B. Think transparent, front-end. Think virally-distributed, mission-critical. But don't think all three at the same time. Think scalable. Is it more important for something to be world-class or to be user-centric? If all of this seems puzzling to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best features of C++ and Python. The models factor is web-enabled. Is it more important for something to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365 or to be dynamic? Think C2B2B. We understand that it is better to redefine robustly than to generate efficiently. What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! 280 Group practically invented the term "partnerships". Quick: do you have a mission-critical game plan for dealing with emerging deliverables? We will upgrade the capacity of viral obfuscation reports to redefine. We will increase our aptitude to empower without lessening our capability to synergize. Without cyber-collaborative branding, you will lack ultra-e-commerce. We will revalue our aptitude to deliver without reducing our aptitude to envisioneer. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our communities but our capability to envisioneer. We will orchestrate the industry jargon "cross-media, best-of-breed". What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! The ability to evolve strategically leads to the capability to visualize iteravely.