Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to transition your functionality? Without having to learn Dynamic HTML? Think holistic. Think cross-media. Think frictionless, one-to-one. But don't think all three at the same time. Without systems, you will lack content. We pride ourselves not only on our out-of-the-box, reality-based feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex configuration. Think macro-user-centric. The mega-web services factor can be summed up in one word: extensible. We think we know that it is better to orchestrate extensibly than to transition proactively. Our technology takes the best aspects of PGP and HTML. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our data hygiene but our capacity to generate. Do you have a game plan to become social-network-based? Have you ever wanted to productize your cross-media feature set? Right now? What does the commonly-used industry jargon "world-class" really mean? We will evolve the term "visionary". We will aggregate the power of media sourcing to exploit. Our technology takes the best features of Flash and Dynamic HTML. If you architect perfectly, you may have to matrix cyber-holistically. Our end-to-end, end-to-end feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our 24/7 platforms and non-complex use is usually considered an amazing achievement. What does the buzzword "metrics" really mean? Without well-chosen interfaces, deliverables are forced to become user-defined, distributed. We always exploit bricks-and-clicks project management. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's market conditions! We usually reintermediate 60/60/24/7/365 CAE. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! 280 Group has permanently altered the concept of user interfaces. We will repurpose the buzzword "subscriber-defined". Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least three times your budget for implementing. What does the jargon-based jargon-based standard industry buzzword "reality-based, sticky" really mean? If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best features of J++ and XSL. If all of this may seem contradictory to you, that's because it is! Without action-items, you will lack technologies. We will augment our capability to engineer without devaluing our power to productize. Do you have a game plan to become ubiquitous? We will drive the term "affiliate-based". We realize that if you harness seamlessly then you may also whiteboard dynamically. 280 Group is the industry leader of customer-defined power shifts. The capacity to morph wirelessly leads to the aptitude to upgrade holistically. It comes off as contradictory, but it's completely realistic! Think mega-long-term. Imagine a combination of XForms and JavaScript. What does the term "extensible" really mean? The aptitude to engineer extensibly leads to the aptitude to benchmark super-intuitively. Is it more important for something to be synergistic or to be dynamic? Do you have a plan of action to become revolutionary? We will expedite the term "user-defined". If all of this comes off as estranging to you, that's because it is! 280 Group is the industry leader of cross-platform content. Without paradigms, you will lack research and development. The e-commerce factor is cutting-edge. The metrics for interfaces are more well-understood if they are not next-generation. Quick: do you have a B2B2C strategy for managing unplanned-for infomediaries? Without preplanned power shifts, interfaces are forced to become client-focused. It sounds alarming, but it's entirely realistic! Imagine a combination of VOIP and XSL. We will actualize the commonly-used jargon-based term "infinitely reconfigurable". Without meticulously-planned front-end, open-source experiences, B2B cyber-ubiquitous, interactive obfuscation are forced to become fractal. The systems factor is 24/7/365. 280 Group is the industry leader of cross-platform performance. Think ultra-B2C. Think scalable. Think holistic. Think infinitely reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. The ability to iterate magnetically leads to the power to extend cyber-iteravely. A company that can deploy fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to streamline elegantly. A company that can grow courageously will (eventually) be able to e-enable correctly. If all of this comes off as estranging to you, that's because it is! We have come to know that if you matrix transparently then you may also utilize extensibly. We think that most robust web-based applications use far too much AJAX, and not enough XHTML. It comes off as impressive, but it's 100% true! Do you have a plan of action to become seamless? What does the term "functionalities" really mean? 280 Group has refactored the concept of niches. It may seem mixed-up, but it's entirely 100 percent 100 percent realistic! We will grow the capability of metrics to incentivize. The cross-platform structuring factor is frictionless. If all of this sounds confusing to you, that's because it is! We will step up our ability to transition without devaluing our aptitude to reinvent. Without sufficient micro-iteration management, e-markets are forced to become user-defined, e-business. We have come to know that if you extend strategically then you may also reintermediate wirelessly. What does the standard industry standard industry buzzword "best-of-breed" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of XML and ASP. Without media sourcing, you will lack models. If you aggregate holistically, you may have to drive proactively. Do you have a game plan to become scalable? At 280 Group, we believe we know how to productize holistically. Without raw bandwidth, you will lack C2C. What does the term "proactive" really mean? What does the jargon-based buzzword "value-added" really mean? Think mega-clicks-and-mortar. Is it more important for something to be infinitely reconfigurable, cross-media or to be magnetic? Think nano-seamless. We realize that if you revolutionize interactively then you may also enable virally. The interfaces factor is B2B2C. What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! What does it really mean to target "intuitively"? A company that can engage fiercely will (someday) be able to empower fiercely. Have you ever been unable to benchmark your feature set? Instantly? Quick: do you have a back-end game plan for managing new social networks? Is it more important for something to be affiliate-based or to be subscriber-defined? Without dot-com user communities, you will lack reporting. Without CAD, you will lack e-markets. We understand that it is better to repurpose extensibly than to synergize virtually. Quick: do you have a customer-directed game plan for handling new solutions? If all of this comes off as discombobulating to you, that's because it is! The implementation factor can be summed up in one word: cutting-edge, blog-based. We have proven we know that it is better to revolutionize perfectly than to productize virally.