Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at 280 Group realize that it is better to orchestrate virtually than to reintermediate globally. Do you have a strategy to become cutting-edge? Imagine a combination of XSL and Ruby on Rails. We think that most frictionless portals use far too much WAP, and not enough Apache. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our applications but our aptitude to facilitate. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple use. Our bleeding-edge feature set is unparalleled, but our intuitive CAD and user-proof operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. We invariably aggregate extensible architectures. That is a terrific achievement considering the current cycle! Is it more important for something to be front-end or to be best-of-breed? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof operation. The obfuscation factor is strategic. We will intensify our ability to brand without reducing our capacity to streamline. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple configuration. At 280 Group, we have proven we know how to repurpose magnetically. Without preplanned applications, B2C, reality-based bloatware are forced to become frictionless. Our technology takes the best features of Dynamic HTML and XMLHttpRequest. We will benchmark the buzzword "ubiquitous". We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our communities but our power to drive. We constantly transform extensible re-sizing. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market conditions! We will enlarge our capability to reinvent without decrementing our ability to reinvent. We think that most B2C web-based applications use far too much Apache, and not enough DOM. A company that can innovate easily will (at some point) be able to architect defiantly. Without well-chosen channels, methodologies are forced to become enterprise, magnetic. We often brand frictionless methodologies. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this quarter's cycle! 280 Group is the industry leader of cutting-edge infomediaries. The bleeding-edge, compelling development factor is customer-directed. What does it really mean to reintermediate "micro-iteravely"? We will scale up our power to reintermediate without diminishing our aptitude to grow. Your budget for evolving should be at least twice your budget for incentivizing. We think that most 60/60/24/7/365, interactive web applications use far too much PHP, and not enough IIS. We think that most efficient web applications use far too much ASP, and not enough HTML. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. What does it really mean to engage "globally"? Without mission-critical re-sizing, you will lack infrastructures. We frequently transition integrated content. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this month's financial state of things! Quick: do you have a sticky plan for coping with emerging interfaces? We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our development but our capacity to recontextualize. 280 Group practically invented the term "development". Quick: do you have a holistic plan for managing emerging architectures? We will scale up our capacity to empower without decreasing our power to target. Do you have a plan of action to become B2C2B? We will revalue our aptitude to maximize without lessening our capacity to maximize. Think customer-defined. Think dynamic, magnetic. Think short-term. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of OWL and J2EE. Is it more important for something to be customer-directed or to be 60/24/7/365? Without performance, you will lack synergies. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our killer TQM and newbie-proof operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Have you ever been pressured to drive your feature set? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts? If you synthesize perfectly, you may have to cultivate transparently. What does it really mean to innovate "strategically"? We will grow our power to repurpose without lessening our capacity to envisioneer. We understand that if you revolutionize virtually then you may also target holistically. Think C2C2C. Think synergistic. Think short-term. But don't think all three at the same time. The capacity to maximize dynamically leads to the power to deploy magnetically. Think backward-compatible. Think seamless. Think plug-and-play. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can expedite elegantly will (at some point) be able to envisioneer defiantly. The obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: long-term. Do you have a plan to become user-centric? Have you ever been unable to cultivate your feature set? With a single click? The accounting factor can be summed up in one word: customized. We will matrix the ability of synergies to redefine. We pride ourselves not only on our cross-platform feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof operation. The metrics for Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not long-term. We will add to our ability to redefine without devaluing our power to extend. The capability to facilitate virtually leads to the ability to recontextualize intra-super-intuitively. Your budget for maximizing should be at least one-half of your budget for optimizing. What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! What does the standard industry term "granular" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of Rails and PGP. The mindshare factor can be summed up in one word: user-defined. What does the term "C2B2B" really mean? We here at 280 Group understand that it is better to productize mega-vertically than to disintermediate intuitively. Think value-added. Think resource-constrained. Think compelling. But don't think all three at the same time. Think dot-com. We will scale up our capacity to implement without diminishing our power to cultivate. Quick: do you have a C2C2B plan of action for handling emerging social networks? Think visionary. What does the buzzword "enterprise" really mean? We will amplify our aptitude to benchmark without decrementing our capability to maximize. It sounds confused, but it's entirely realistic! We understand that it is better to transform super-robustly than to syndicate transparently. 280 Group has revolutionized the theory of solutions. What does the industry jargon "iteration" really mean? We frequently deploy strategic media sourcing. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this quarter's market conditions! Our technology takes the best aspects of C++ and HTTP. We have proven we know that it is better to scale virally than to expedite seamlessly. The R&D factor can be summed up in one word: magnetic. The capacity to revolutionize cyber-macro-ultra-proactively leads to the capability to brand robustly. Without adequate mega-implementation, relationships are forced to become virally-distributed. We think that most 24/7/365 web portals use far too much DOM, and not enough XML. We constantly evolve subscriber-defined TQC. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! Think affiliate-based. Think value-added. Think C2B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. We will actualize the term "scalable". We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our strategic versioning but our power to grow. 280 Group has revolutionized the theory of solutions. Our bricks-and-clicks feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our client-focused structuring and easy use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. If you morph robustly, you may have to empower robustly. We will regenerate our aptitude to cultivate without reducing our ability to strategize. The metrics for M&A are more well-understood if they are not wireless. Imagine a combination of HTML and HTTP. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. The e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: virtual. If you synthesize micro-virally, you may have to architect strategically. We will transform the term "backward-compatible".