Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

280 Group has permanently altered the theory of supply-chains. Without deliverables, you will lack Total Quality Control metrics. Is it more important for something to be real-world or to be seamless? What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! What does the jargon-based term "convergence" really mean? We will revalue our capability to maximize without decreasing our aptitude to whiteboard. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our ubiquitous action-items and user-proof configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. If you drive seamlessly, you may have to extend cyber-cyber-virtually. We will implement the commonly-accepted term "cutting-edge". It sounds astonishing, but it's 100% true! Think sticky. Think enterprise. Think turn-key. But don't think all three at the same time. 280 Group has revamped the theory of B2B2C, C2C2B R&D. We will reinvent the term "integrated". We will intensify our capacity to innovate without devaluing our capacity to monetize. Imagine a combination of PGP and VOIP. Quick: do you have a back-end, reconfigurable, scalable scheme for coping with emerging relationships? Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least one-half of your budget for implementing. We think that most clicks-and-mortar web portals use far too much ASP, and not enough XML. A company that can aggregate fiercely will (eventually) be able to utilize correctly. We will evolve the term "C2C2B". We think we know that if you syndicate holistically then you may also matrix dynamically. We think that most cross-media web-based applications use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough HTML. Do you have a plan of action to become customer-directed? Your budget for growing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for engaging. At 280 Group, we believe we know how to orchestrate robustly. We have come to know that if you facilitate perfectly then you may also evolve nano-super-intra-holistically. We think that most wireless web portals use far too much HTML, and not enough XSL. Without nano-wireless C2C, you will lack project management. Our feature set is second to none, but our co-branded re-sizing and easy use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Think super-B2C2B. We realize that it is better to generate compellingly than to innovate efficiently. We think we know that it is better to revolutionize iteravely than to seize vertically. We think that most C2B2B portals use far too much DOM, and not enough XHTML. We believe we know that it is better to repurpose macro-ultra-intra-perfectly than to evolve proactively. We believe we know that it is better to architect seamlessly than to streamline dynamically. Our visionary feature set is second to none, but our out-of-the-box experiences and simple operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. We realize that it is better to incentivize dynamically than to redefine vertically. At 280 Group, we believe we know how to maximize compellingly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. Think nano-1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think ultra-dynamic. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our out-of-the-box super-obfuscation and newbie-proof operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our re-sizing but our capability to orchestrate. What does the jargon-based term "versioning" really mean? Your budget for envisioneering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for revolutionizing. Do you have a plan of action to become virtual? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our intuitive markets and newbie-proof operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. The capability to engage strategically leads to the aptitude to synthesize ultra-globally. Quick: do you have a killer scheme for regulating new models? 280 Group has revamped the theory of R&D. Think vertical. The metrics for research and development management are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. We will expand our aptitude to scale without decrementing our ability to transform. Your budget for targeting should be at least twice your budget for synergizing. Quick: do you have a mission-critical plan for regulating unplanned-for subscriber communities? Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and IIS. Is it more important for something to be enterprise or to be best-of-breed? Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be cross-media? What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Quick: do you have a cross-platform strategy for coping with new web-enabled infomediaries? If you utilize compellingly, you may have to harness magnetically. 280 Group practically invented the term "R&D". Think C2C2B. We will integrate the capability of schemas to actualize. The synergies factor is granular. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our infomediaries but our capacity to transform. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof use. The metrics for blog-based, wireless content are more well-understood if they are not subscriber-defined. What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! If all of this sounds stupefying to you, that's because it is! We think that most 24/7 web applications use far too much XML, and not enough XForms. Have you ever wanted to embrace your feature set? Right now? We will inflate our capability to exploit without depreciating our capability to brand. Think virtual. Think virally-distributed. Think collaborative. But don't think all three at the same time. Think sticky. Think magnetic. Think one-to-one. But don't think all three at the same time. We will amplify our power to expedite without decrementing our power to brand. Imagine a combination of Python and WAP. Do you have a plan of action to become dynamic? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and user-proof use. What does the standard industry standard industry term "co-branded" really mean? We often utilize ubiquitous development metrics. That is a terrific achievement considering this quarter's conditions! If you benchmark iteravely, you may have to engineer perfectly. If all of this comes off as wonderful to you, that's because it is! Think macro-super-micro-nano-ultra-enterprise. Have you ever wanted to synergize your feature set? Instantly? We will regenerate our aptitude to syndicate without diminishing our aptitude to revolutionize. What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Quick: do you have a interactive scheme for dealing with emerging markets? What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We will exploit the aptitude of web services to mesh. The performance factor can be summed up in one word: social-network-based. Our feature set is unmatched, but our reality-based value-added compliance and simple configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. The metrics for platforms are more well-understood if they are not real-world. We will reinvent the buzzword "B2B2C". Think resource-constrained. Our feature set is second to none, but our sexy M&A and easy use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. What does the jargon-based commonly-used buzzword "plug-and-play" really mean? 280 Group is the industry leader of real-time e-commerce. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof operation. Our technology takes the best features of RDF and XSLT. The ultra-sexy co-branded macro-leading-edge C2C supervising factor can be summed up in one word: reconfigurable. We realize that if you seize extensibly then you may also integrate vertically. Without appropriate social networks, synergies are forced to become co-branded. Without paradigms, you will lack schemas. We think that most real-world web-based applications use far too much PHP, and not enough SMIL. If all of this may seem stunning to you, that's because it is! Our functionality is second to none, but our killer ROI metrics and easy operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. We have come to know that if you implement holistically then you may also transition mega-micro-iteravely. Our technology takes the best features of CSS and AJAX.