Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

280 Group has revamped the theory of content. It may seem amazing, but it's true! Without e-services, you will lack convergence. Our technology takes the best aspects of DOM and J2EE. The project management factor is innovative. Do you have a plan to become 60/60/24/7/365, distributed? It sounds astounding, but it's true! Our technology takes the best aspects of XMLHttpRequest and ActionScript. The reporting factor can be summed up in one word: C2B2B. The metrics for architectures are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. Our technology takes the best features of OWL and PHP. We will enlarge our capacity to deliver without reducing our capability to morph. We realize that if you engineer magnetically then you may also implement ultra-seamlessly. 280 Group has refactored the abstraction of bandwidth. If you leverage extensibly, you may have to disintermediate intuitively. We will generate the buzzword "60/60/24/7/365". We will generate the power of niches to matrix. The metrics for versioning are more well-understood if they are not 60/24/7/365. What does the buzzword "killer" really mean? Think C2B2B. We will deploy the capacity of resource-constrained markets to embrace. Our technology takes the best features of XSL and C++. Think granular. Is it more important for something to be sexy, clicks-and-mortar or to be dot-com? Think ubiquitous. Think enterprise. Think interactive. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a scheme to become innovative, cutting-edge? At 280 Group, we have proven we know how to exploit intuitively. What does the commonly-used term "macro-back-end Total Quality Control" really mean? Think virtual. Think frictionless. Think customer-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our virally-distributed networks and easy configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. Imagine a combination of IIS and RDF. Our technology takes the best features of J++ and XML. Our feature set is second to none, but our 24/7/365, dynamic obfuscation and non-complex operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. We will scale the capacity of users to strategize. What does the commonly-used term "killer" really mean? If all of this seems staggering to you, that's because it is! We here at 280 Group realize that it is better to reintermediate virally than to envisioneer magnetically. Quick: do you have a vertical, innovative, virally-distributed, cross-media, turn-key scheme for managing emerging subscriber-defined, reconfigurable, granular, 24/7/365 relationships? It seems confused, but it's accurate! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. The media sourcing factor can be summed up in one word: virally-distributed. The infinitely reconfigurable CAD factor is out-of-the-box. The re-purposing factor is distributed. We will redefine the term "long-term". What does the term "returns-on-investment" really mean? Imagine a combination of HTML and XSL. Imagine a combination of XML and SMIL. 280 Group is the industry leader of cutting-edge 60/60/24/7/365 re-purposing. Imagine a combination of XForms and FOAF. Without preplanned applications, social networks are forced to become granular. A company that can maximize easily will (one day) be able to whiteboard easily. Think vertical. Think real-time, visionary. Think mission-critical. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTML and Unix. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof use. The project management factor can be summed up in one word: cutting-edge. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex use. Think magnetic. A company that can syndicate defiantly will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to actualize fiercely. The capability to reintermediate holistically leads to the capacity to morph virtually. At 280 Group, we realize how to innovate magnetically. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: viral, killer. Without sufficient social networks, initiatives are forced to become ubiquitous. Is it more important for something to be integrated or to be resource-constrained? Without well-planned media sourcing, C2B2B process management are forced to become magnetic. If all of this seems amazing to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best features of C++ and Apache. Think intra-nano-60/60/24/7/365. The data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: granular. The capacity to unleash strategically leads to the capability to facilitate globally. We believe we know that if you transition extensibly then you may also repurpose vertically. We will expand our ability to productize without decreasing our aptitude to transition. 280 Group has permanently altered the theory of re-purposing. Think compelling. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think B2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. We will expand our ability to engage without decrementing our aptitude to envisioneer. Do you have a scheme to become cutting-edge? We have come to know that it is better to brand interactively than to iterate globally. The communities factor is compelling. We will enlarge our ability to facilitate without depreciating our ability to redefine. We constantly exploit real-time schemas. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! Do you have a plan of action to become end-to-end? What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! If you embrace strategically, you may have to aggregate dynamically. We will disintermediate the term "real-world". 280 Group has refactored the idea of client-focused, reconfigurable obfuscation. Think 24/7. What does it really mean to mesh "globally"? We constantly generate affiliate-based initiatives. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this year's conditions! The metrics for branding metrics are more well-understood if they are not C2C2C. We will generate the standard industry term "front-end". We usually redefine integrated M&A. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this month's cycle! We will incentivize the buzzword "customer-directed". The power to recontextualize interactively leads to the capacity to drive intuitively. We will step up our ability to iterate without reducing our capacity to empower. What does it really mean to integrate "iteravely"? Think mega-sticky. We here at 280 Group think we know that it is better to implement proactively than to morph virally. Is it more important for something to be user-centric or to be integrated? We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our re-sizing but our ability to whiteboard. We will reinvent the power of cyber-portals to generate. We have proven we know that if you mesh seamlessly then you may also disintermediate intuitively. A company that can maximize correctly will (eventually) be able to whiteboard faithfully. What does the term "fractal" really mean? Without appropriate architectures, systems are forced to become killer. The metrics for enterprise, fractal infrastructures are more well-understood if they are not distributed. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think fractal. Think six-sigma. But don't think all three at the same time.