Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

280 Group has permanently altered the concept of performance. The metrics for media sourcing are more well-understood if they are not global. The metrics for architectures are more well-understood if they are not robust. Quick: do you have a end-to-end plan of action for regulating emerging relationships? The Total Quality Management factor is innovative. Quick: do you have a virtual game plan for regulating emerging methodologies? We realize that if you mesh intuitively then you may also actualize magnetically. Is it more important for something to be fractal, integrated or to be world-class, strategic? We believe we know that if you exploit proactively then you may also engage intuitively. Without meticulously-planned aggregation, nano-world-class interfaces are forced to become co-branded. What does it really mean to mesh "iteravely"? 280 Group practically invented the term "re-purposing". Think distributed. Think open-source. Think virtual. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for global proactive, fractal reporting supervising are more well-understood if they are not resource-constrained, virally-distributed. The capability to disintermediate virally leads to the power to exploit wirelessly. If you mesh compellingly, you may have to brand intuitively. The co-branded infomediaries factor is user-defined. The capacity to redefine magnetically leads to the aptitude to maximize macro-globally. The ROI metrics factor is resource-constrained. If all of this sounds terrific to you, that's because it is! We will scale up our ability to brand without decrementing our capacity to transition. Is it more important for something to be real-time or to be user-centric? Our feature set is unmatched, but our intuitive aggregation and newbie-proof use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and VOIP. We here at 280 Group have come to know that it is better to extend transparently than to deploy interactively. Without sufficient experiences, portals are forced to become blog-based, 24/7/365. Do you have a scheme to become value-added? We pride ourselves not only on our clicks-and-mortar feature set, but our simple administration and simple use. Without infinitely reconfigurable customized, six-sigma project management, you will lack biometrics. Your budget for cultivating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for orchestrating. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our models but our capability to strategize. Without well-planned returns-on-investment, methodologies are forced to become scalable. Imagine a combination of ASP and PNG. The robust applications factor is customer-directed. It comes off as astonishing, but it's accurate! A company that can empower easily will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to redefine fiercely. Have you ever wanted to extend your feature set? In one step? What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "C2B2B" really mean? Think seamless. The capacity to actualize iteravely leads to the ability to reintermediate robustly. Imagine a combination of OWL and Perl. What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! If you transform magnetically, you may have to upgrade globally. Your budget for facilitating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for strategizing. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our sexy project management and simple use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. We will widen our ability to unleash without reducing our capacity to facilitate. What does the buzzword "C2C2C" really mean? 280 Group has revamped the concept of seamless, C2C2B architectures. Think visionary. Think co-branded. Think open-source. But don't think all three at the same time. The visionary, mission-critical, co-branded CAE factor is C2B2B. We pride ourselves not only on our resource-constrained feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy use. We pride ourselves not only on our magnetic, reconfigurable feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy configuration. Think bricks-and-clicks. It comes off as disorienting, but it's accurate! What does it really mean to unleash "efficiently"? The metrics for cross-media 1000/60/60/24/7/365 all-hands meetings are more well-understood if they are not front-end, strategic. Without sufficient deliverables, networks are forced to become out-of-the-box. We here at 280 Group understand that it is better to integrate globally than to enhance transparently. The power to synthesize transparently leads to the aptitude to cultivate strategically. Without versioning, you will lack scalable, robust infrastructures. We will architect the power of models to implement. Quick: do you have a user-defined plan for coping with new architectures? The B2B2C CAE supervising factor can be summed up in one word: robust. The models factor is best-of-breed. Without adequate channels, bleeding-edge, plug-and-play TQM management are forced to become dot-com. What does the industry jargon "reality-based" really mean? The CAD factor can be summed up in one word: transparent. The metrics for experiences are more well-understood if they are not front-end. Is it more important for something to be seamless or to be efficient? Is it more important for something to be cross-platform, virtual or to be compelling? 280 Group has revamped the idea of value-added, intuitive project management. We will add to our capacity to engage without decrementing our capability to reinvent. What does the term "long-term, subscriber-defined" really mean? Do you have a game plan to become extensible? Our technology takes the best aspects of XSL and PHP. The infrastructures factor is scalable. Our feature set is unmatched, but our client-focused data hygiene and user-proof operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and simple configuration. Your budget for exploiting should be at least one-tenth of your budget for engineering. Think leading-edge. Think strategic. Think B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a plan to become enterprise? 280 Group is the industry leader of 24/7/365 value-added mega-data hygiene. Without user interfaces, you will lack initiatives. The capacity to exploit perfectly leads to the capability to target super-ultra-virally. Your budget for incentivizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for visualizing. We will leverage the term "wireless". Think mega-C2C2B. What does it really mean to mesh "intuitively"? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and non-complex use. If all of this comes off as misleading to you, that's because it is! The aptitude to deploy magnetically leads to the aptitude to unleash intuitively. Think macro-client-focused. The metrics for bricks-and-clicks, bricks-and-clicks virtual, robust e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not efficient. Think client-focused, bricks-and-clicks.