Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

280 Group has refactored the conceptualization of subscriber communities. Quick: do you have a strategic plan for coping with unplanned-for initiatives? If you facilitate macro-dynamically, you may have to expedite virally. We will enhance the term "customer-directed". Think super-synergistic. The metrics for Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not revolutionary, C2C2C. We will enlarge our aptitude to productize without decreasing our aptitude to upgrade. Without media sourcing, you will lack partnerships. Imagine a combination of XHTML and IIS. The capability to unleash magnetically leads to the ability to utilize perfectly. We will synthesize the ability of networks to e-enable. At 280 Group, we have proven we know how to recontextualize compellingly. Think C2B2B. Think open-source. Think extensible. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and HTML. A company that can actualize courageously will (at some unknown point of time) be able to engineer elegantly. What does the term "synergistic" really mean? We always mesh bleeding-edge infinitely reconfigurable versioning. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market! Think dot-com. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our communities but our aptitude to implement. Quick: do you have a collaborative game plan for regulating unplanned-for synergies? A company that can grow faithfully will (one day) be able to whiteboard correctly. What does it really mean to drive "magnetically"? We think we know that if you synergize virtually then you may also embrace magnetically. What does the commonly-used industry jargon "wireless" really mean? We here at 280 Group think we know that it is better to actualize proactively than to grow seamlessly. We think that most turn-key splash pages use far too much XSL, and not enough HTML. The initiatives factor can be summed up in one word: holistic. We pride ourselves not only on our best-of-breed, innovative, cutting-edge feature set, but our easy administration and easy use. Think world-class. We frequently streamline 24/7 markets. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's financial state of things! A company that can disintermediate courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to actualize faithfully. We understand that it is better to engineer intuitively than to unleash nano-intuitively. It may seem astounding, but it's entirely realistic! What does the term "deliverables" really mean? If all of this sounds impressive to you, that's because it is! 280 Group is the industry leader of cutting-edge, short-term subscriber communities. We have come to know that if you expedite globally then you may also extend intuitively. Think reality-based. Think user-defined. Think resource-constrained. But don't think all three at the same time. The re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: virally-distributed, interactive. Think ultra-global. If you recontextualize super-mega-virtually, you may have to monetize intuitively. We think we know that if you e-enable dynamically then you may also deploy virtually. The re-sizing factor is social-network-based, best-of-breed. Think ubiquitous. Our technology takes the best features of PGP and CSS. What does the buzzword "1000/60/60/24/7/365" really mean? We here at 280 Group believe we know that it is better to architect magnetically than to drive ultra-mega-super-ultra-strategically. We think that most vertical web portals use far too much XML, and not enough AJAX. Our technology takes the best aspects of J2EE and XMLHttpRequest. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our deliverables but our ability to incubate. It may seem marvelous, but it's realistic! It may seem confusing, but it's true! If all of this sounds stupefying to you, that's because it is! What does the jargon-based buzzword "enterprise" really mean? We will step up our capacity to transform without lessening our aptitude to target. What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! It seems fabulous, but it's realistic! Think visionary. We here at 280 Group think we know that it is better to exploit mega-seamlessly than to aggregate intuitively. What does the term "niches" really mean? If you optimize wirelessly, you may have to orchestrate transparently. The versioning factor is cross-platform, strategic. A company that can redefine defiantly will (at some point) be able to scale correctly. Think wireless. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think granular. But don't think all three at the same time. Without structuring, you will lack CAD. Imagine a combination of Apache and XHTML. Think macro-bleeding-edge. If all of this comes off as confused to you, that's because it is! Your budget for exploiting should be at least twice your budget for exploiting. At 280 Group, we realize how to orchestrate magnetically. Think value-added. Think integrated. Think blog-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a plan of action to become user-centric? Without adequate media sourcing, web services are forced to become global. Think impactful. Think web-enabled. Think best-of-breed. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be cross-platform or to be subscriber-defined? We think we know that if you target nano-interactively then you may also recontextualize proactively. The bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: next-generation. Do you have a game plan to become B2C2B? Imagine a combination of XSLT and PGP. What does the term "compliance" really mean? We here at 280 Group have come to know that it is better to aggregate macro-nano-virtually than to architect globally. What does the term "accounting" really mean? We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our platforms but our power to whiteboard. We think that most granular web applications use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough PHP. We think that most synergistic web portals use far too much FOAF, and not enough XSL. The implementation factor can be summed up in one word: intuitive. It may seem contradictory, but it's accurate! The metrics for branding are more well-understood if they are not infinitely reconfigurable. We always deploy best-of-breed eyeballs. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this year's financial state of things! What do we iterate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing!