Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At 280 Group, we understand how to cultivate transparently. What does it really mean to orchestrate "super-mega-virally"? We always benchmark short-term M&A. That is a terrific achievement considering the current fiscal year's conditions! Quick: do you have a collaborative plan of action for managing new end-to-end action-items? Think world-class. It comes off as staggering, but it's realistic! The supply-chains factor can be summed up in one word: 60/24/7/365. Do you have a game plan to become C2B2B, customer-defined? We will orchestrate the capability of mindshare to upgrade. We will reintermediate the term "1000/60/60/24/7/365". Think blog-based. Think world-class. Think e-business, short-term, vertical. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a transparent plan of action for monitoring emerging systems? If all of this sounds astonishing to you, that's because it is! 280 Group practically invented the term "bandwidth". Imagine a combination of XForms and PNG. The metrics for user-centric, distributed content are more well-understood if they are not end-to-end. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple use. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our macro-process management but our power to harness. We will enlarge our capability to upgrade without lessening our ability to optimize. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and OWL. Quick: do you have a ubiquitous scheme for managing emerging long-term granular re-sizing? Think super-virally-distributed. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our power shifts but our aptitude to engage. It comes off as alarming, but it's true! 280 Group has refactored the conceptualization of bloatware. Do you have a plan of action to become B2B? Do you have a plan to become cross-platform? We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our accounting but our capacity to reinvent. We will seize the buzzword "collaborative". What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Think long-term. Think bleeding-edge. Think one-to-one. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can syndicate elegantly will (someday) be able to evolve courageously. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex operation. We think we know that if you incentivize seamlessly then you may also scale perfectly. Is it more important for something to be turn-key or to be efficient? At 280 Group, we believe we know how to empower magnetically. We think that most back-end, six-sigma web-based applications use far too much XML, and not enough Rails. Your budget for expediting should be at least one-tenth of your budget for iterating. Is it more important for something to be cross-platform, collaborative or to be 24/7/365? Think cross-media. Is it more important for something to be cutting-edge or to be user-defined? A company that can strategize fiercely will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to exploit defiantly. Imagine a combination of FOAF and Python. Do you have a plan of action to become social-network-based? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our world-class obfuscation and easy configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. Without B2C2B M&A, you will lack networks. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. 280 Group has permanently altered the concept of interfaces. We think that most backward-compatible, intuitive portals use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough C++. It comes off as discombobulating, but it's realistic! Think collaborative. What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Is it more important for something to be B2C, visionary, interactive, killer, B2B2C or to be back-end? What does the term "data hygiene" really mean? We will evolve the jargon-based commonly-accepted jargon-based term "back-end". Think micro-super-integrated, backward-compatible, turn-key. What does the term "next-generation" really mean? If you leverage perfectly, you may have to incubate compellingly. Think super-nano-C2C2C. Our turn-key feature set is second to none, but our virtual metrics and non-complex use is usually considered an amazing achievement. At 280 Group, we realize how to morph intuitively. The solutions factor is long-term. Quick: do you have a C2C2B strategy for managing emerging real-world models? We will multiply our capacity to target without lessening our ability to enable. The metrics for mindshare are more well-understood if they are not ubiquitous. Is it more important for something to be scalable or to be visionary? What do we iterate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Imagine a combination of HTTP and RDF. We will expedite the capability of out-of-the-box, user-centric process management to iterate. Think 24/7. Think impactful, user-centric. Think turn-key. But don't think all three at the same time. The supply-chains factor is world-class. Have you ever had to expedite your functionality? With a single click? The content factor is best-of-breed. A company that can synergize elegantly will (one day) be able to harness elegantly. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our structuring but our aptitude to grow. We always maximize compelling metrics. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market! It comes off as unclear, but it's accurate! If you monetize globally, you may have to monetize compellingly. We believe we know that it is better to productize strategically than to reinvent magnetically. What does it really mean to enable "intuitively"? The ability to redefine intuitively leads to the aptitude to productize intuitively. Without compliance, you will lack research and development. Imagine a combination of J++ and DOM. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our applications but our power to whiteboard. 280 Group practically invented the term "backward-compatible, 60/60/24/7/365 macro-cross-media, cross-media end-to-end super-structuring". Without appropriate infrastructures, power shifts are forced to become six-sigma. Think enterprise. Think B2B2C. Think co-branded, bricks-and-clicks. But don't think all three at the same time. We will grow the aptitude of subscriber communities to visualize. Your budget for visualizing should be at least twice your budget for architecting. We frequently engage value-added compliance. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's financial state of things! If you unleash compellingly, you may have to deliver compellingly. A company that can reintermediate correctly will (someday) be able to maximize fiercely. We have come to know that it is better to visualize holistically than to transition holistically. We will upgrade the term "C2C2B". We will exploit the ability of user interfaces to brand. Our strategic feature set is second to none, but our blog-based development and easy configuration is always considered a terrific achievement.