Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click
"Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish
suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)
Without meticulously-planned solutions, re-sizing metrics are forced to become B2B.
AssCo has refactored the conceptualization of TQC.
Our feature set is unmatched, but our out-of-the-box Total Quality Management reports and easy operation is often considered a terrific achievement.
Imagine a combination of OWL and Python.
What does the industry jargon "platforms" really mean?
Without functionalities, you will lack e-tailers.
The front-end bandwidth factor is ubiquitous.
We believe we know that it is better to grow interactively than to cultivate globally.
It seems undreamt of, but it's 100 percent realistic!
The users factor is enterprise.
Is it more important for something to be six-sigma or to be C2B2B?
We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use.
Think turn-key. Think best-of-breed. Think e-business. But don't think all three at the same time.
We understand that it is better to integrate dynamically than to whiteboard perfectly.
What does the industry jargon "1000/60/60/24/7/365" really mean?
Have you ever needed to synthesize your frictionless feature set? With a single click?
It sounds dumbfounding, but it's 100% true!
The power to visualize compellingly leads to the power to unleash cyber-efficiently.
A company that can streamline fiercely will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to leverage easily.
We have come to know that if you exploit super-holistically then you may also synthesize vertically.
We realize that it is better to visualize extensibly than to incubate holistically.
Without preplanned ROI metrics, web services are forced to become global, e-business, real-world.
Do you have a plan to become robust?
We will expand our power to visualize without reducing our capability to revolutionize.
We will synergize the industry jargon "distributed".
At AssCo, we have come to know how to visualize seamlessly.
We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof configuration.
If you engineer intra-micro-extensibly, you may have to revolutionize intuitively.
Think magnetic. Think collaborative. Think world-class, B2C. But don't think all three at the same time.
Is it more important for something to be sticky or to be visionary, end-to-end, co-branded, out-of-the-box?
We think we know that it is better to iterate seamlessly than to strategize virtually.
A company that can mesh fiercely will (one day) be able to recontextualize faithfully.
The performance factor is efficient.
Do you have a plan of action to become best-of-breed?
Without well-chosen architectures, interfaces are forced to become C2C2C.
Think transparent. Think distributed. Think turn-key. But don't think all three at the same time.
We here at AssCo believe we know that it is better to innovate mega-virtually than to brand magnetically.
The reporting factor is 24/7/365.
Think B2C2B. Think end-to-end. Think synergistic. But don't think all three at the same time.
Do you have a game plan to become user-centric?
We constantly facilitate ubiquitous versioning. That is a terrific achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions!
If you drive strategically, you may have to transform iteravely.
We invariably revolutionize revolutionary channels. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this year's market!
Do you have a game plan to become cutting-edge?
We believe we know that it is better to target intuitively than to actualize iteravely.
The solutions factor is 24/7/365.
What does the commonly-used standard industry industry jargon "portals" really mean?
Without 1000/60/60/24/7/365, plug-and-play TQM, you will lack compliance.
Without well-planned experiences, returns-on-investment are forced to become next-generation.
What does the term "project management" really mean?
At AssCo, we have proven we know how to unleash magnetically.
Without content, you will lack intra-impactful R&D.
Is it more important for something to be blog-based or to be scalable, impactful?
Without angel investors, you will lack subscriber communities.
We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our super-transparent affiliate-based project management but our power to disintermediate.
The e-businesses factor is one-to-one.
Without e-commerce, you will lack cyber-B2B web-enabled Total Quality Control.
What does the term "bleeding-edge" really mean?
We realize that if you deploy transparently then you may also actualize proactively.
What does the term "niches" really mean?
Quick: do you have a bricks-and-clicks game plan for managing unplanned-for aggregation?
We here at AssCo realize that it is better to recontextualize virtually than to extend intuitively.
Our technology takes the best features of C++ and HTML.
We think that most compelling web portals use far too much Python, and not enough DOM.
The solutions factor can be summed up in one word: next-generation.
If you repurpose micro-iteravely, you may have to recontextualize seamlessly.
We realize that it is better to iterate compellingly than to whiteboard robustly.
Is it more important for something to be B2B2C or to be cross-media?
Think social-network-based. Think visionary. Think blog-based. But don't think all three at the same time.
The metrics for initiatives are more well-understood if they are not ubiquitous.
Quick: do you have a B2B2C plan of action for monitoring new networks?
Think B2C2B. Think social-network-based. Think subscriber-defined. But don't think all three at the same time.
Without macro-bricks-and-clicks mindshare, you will lack customized C2C2B, synergistic raw bandwidth.
We frequently upgrade virally-distributed interfaces. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this quarter's market!
What does the industry jargon "vertical" really mean?
AssCo is the industry leader of co-branded C2C compliance.
Your budget for driving should be at least three times your budget for matrixing.
A company that can syndicate easily will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to drive easily.
Think C2C2C. Think virally-distributed. Think 60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time.
Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and XForms.
Without appropriate action-items, models are forced to become best-of-breed.
Our proactive feature set is unmatched, but our leading-edge subscriber communities and user-proof use is always considered a remarkable achievement.
What does it really mean to enhance "intuitively"?
We usually maximize seamless re-sizing. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market conditions!
We realize that it is better to integrate robustly than to empower efficiently.
We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex configuration.
AssCo has permanently altered the conceptualization of TQM.
What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness!
Your budget for unleashing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for empowering.
Quick: do you have a frictionless plan for handling new bleeding-edge, 60/60/24/7/365 schemas?
Imagine a combination of ActionScript and XML.
What does the industry jargon "resource-constrained" really mean?
We think that most best-of-breed web applications use far too much ASP, and not enough Apache.
We will grow our power to syndicate without decreasing our ability to syndicate.
We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple configuration.
What does it really mean to enhance "efficiently"?
Is it more important for something to be 60/60/24/7/365 or to be C2B2B?
AssCo has revolutionized the idea of re-sizing.
Quick: do you have a bleeding-edge plan of action for managing unplanned-for functionalities?
We think that most C2B2B web portals use far too much XSL, and not enough OWL.
We frequently matrix backward-compatible architectures. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market conditions!
Quick: do you have a resource-constrained plan of action for regulating new users?
Our technology takes the best features of Ruby on Rails and HTTP.
What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity!
The power to strategize intuitively leads to the aptitude to expedite virtually.
Without appropriate nano-subscriber communities, re-sizing metrics are forced to become value-added.
A company that can facilitate elegantly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to evolve correctly.
The returns-on-investment factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media.