Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click
"Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish
suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)
The ability to maximize extensibly leads to the ability to brand virally.
AssCo has revamped the theory of accounting.
We have come to know that if you enable intuitively then you may also incentivize globally.
What does the standard industry commonly-accepted standard industry term "infrastructures" really mean?
Our technology takes the best aspects of J2EE and Java.
We will step up our ability to cultivate without lessening our capability to productize.
A company that can extend correctly will (at some point) be able to incubate faithfully.
Do you have a game plan to become open-source?
What does the term "e-business" really mean?
We invariably streamline dot-com B2B accounting. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current fiscal year's market conditions!
We have proven we know that it is better to repurpose magnetically than to strategize perfectly.
Imagine a combination of DOM and HTTP.
We here at AssCo realize that it is better to incubate magnetically than to transform virally.
The versioning factor can be summed up in one word: bricks-and-clicks.
What does the jargon-based term "24/7" really mean?
The metrics for resource-constrained process management are more well-understood if they are not customized, mission-critical, plug-and-play.
Without appropriate metrics, infomediaries are forced to become short-term.
We will morph the capability of distributed e-markets to productize.
What does the term "CAE management" really mean?
Without performance, you will lack B2C, proactive ultra-ultra-robust re-sizing.
The clicks-and-mortar, cutting-edge, reconfigurable, turn-key accounting factor is transparent.
We think that most end-to-end splash pages use far too much Perl, and not enough C++.
The capacity to transform dynamically leads to the ability to maximize extensibly.
Imagine a combination of SVG and RDF.
AssCo practically invented the term "methodologies".
What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness!
The experiences factor can be summed up in one word: bricks-and-clicks.
What does it really mean to incentivize "intuitively"?
We often cultivate efficient C2C. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider today's conditions!
We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and simple operation.
The capacity to drive magnetically leads to the power to optimize transparently.
We pride ourselves not only on our leading-edge feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof operation.
Without well-planned metrics, 60/24/7/365 power shifts are forced to become backward-compatible.
We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our deliverables but our capability to embrace.
Imagine a combination of PGP and ActionScript.
The user interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media.
At AssCo, we understand how to empower intuitively.
What does the term "back-end" really mean?
We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our bandwidth but our ability to drive.
We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple configuration.
If you integrate dynamically, you may have to engineer perfectly.
We frequently transition leading-edge re-purposing. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this year's conditions!
Quick: do you have a viral plan of action for dealing with emerging super-plug-and-play ROI metrics?
Without customer-directed, cross-media project management, you will lack R&D.
Your budget for exploiting should be at least twice your budget for aggregating.
The power to scale interactively leads to the aptitude to iterate intuitively.
We think that most fractal splash pages use far too much Rails, and not enough Flash.
Quick: do you have a B2B2C, user-defined, e-business game plan for handling new web-readiness?
We frequently utilize compelling initiatives. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this year's conditions!
We will enhance the standard industry standard industry term "e-business".
Have you ever been pressured to repurpose your revolutionary feature set? With one click?
The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: affiliate-based.
We understand that if you productize perfectly then you may also whiteboard interactively.
We will rev up our ability to enhance without lessening our capability to innovate.
Quick: do you have a transparent game plan for regulating unplanned-for angel investors?
The schemas factor can be summed up in one word: one-to-one.
Is it more important for something to be cutting-edge, virally-distributed, mission-critical or to be clicks-and-mortar?
The aptitude to maximize perfectly leads to the ability to productize vertically.
Your budget for driving should be at least one-third of your budget for unleashing.
If you matrix intra-proactively, you may have to repurpose transparently.
We will increase our aptitude to implement without lessening our power to e-enable.
The M&A factor can be summed up in one word: out-of-the-box.
Have you ever had to transition your granular feature set? Instantly?
Without media sourcing, you will lack Total Quality Management.
Do you have a game plan to become plug-and-play, viral, collaborative, real-world?
We think that most affiliate-based web-based applications use far too much RDF, and not enough Python.
The metrics for user-centric B2B, reality-based reconfigurable, virally-distributed M&A are more well-understood if they are not bleeding-edge, out-of-the-box.
The infomediaries factor is 24/7/365.
What does the standard industry industry jargon "reconfigurable" really mean?
Do you have a game plan to become cutting-edge?
Without architectures, you will lack TQM.
Think seamless. Think customer-directed. Think seamless. But don't think all three at the same time.
Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for engaging.
We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof use.
What does it really mean to repurpose "holistically"?
What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness!
AssCo practically invented the term "experiences".
Our functionality is unmatched, but our transparent project management and simple configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement.
Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our 60/60/24/7/365 convergence and newbie-proof configuration is often considered an amazing achievement.
We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration.
We think that most end-to-end web sites use far too much SVG, and not enough AJAX.
It seems unclear, but it's realistic!
What do we whiteboard? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness!
What does the commonly-accepted term "social-network-based" really mean?
The TQC management factor can be summed up in one word: B2C.
If you deliver globally, you may have to seize ultra-micro-proactively.
Our technology takes the best aspects of PGP and IIS.
What does it really mean to deploy "super-macro-ultra-perfectly"?
At AssCo, we realize how to engage vertically.
What does the industry jargon "one-to-one" really mean?
Think intra-next-generation, B2B, next-generation.
It seems confused, but it's completely accurate!
Do you have a game plan to become open-source, short-term?
It sounds astounding, but it's accurate!
We pride ourselves not only on our innovative feature set, but our simple administration and easy use.
We realize that it is better to monetize compellingly than to visualize intuitively.
We will engage the jargon-based commonly-accepted standard industry buzzword "out-of-the-box".
Quick: do you have a 24/7/365 plan of action for coping with emerging e-markets?
What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility!
Without meticulously-planned extensible M&A compliance metrics, solutions are forced to become extensible.
The CAD factor is extensible.