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Andrew Davidson.
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Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)
Company Name: 

Your Randomly-Generated Corporate Gibberish:


If all of this seems confounding to you, that's because it is!
AssCo practically invented the term "metrics". Think intra-leading-edge. We often benchmark extensible front-end systems. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market! We will envisioneer the aptitude of supply-chains to mesh. We have come to know that if you mesh intuitively then you may also enable compellingly. Without all-hands meetings, you will lack biometrics. Think clicks-and-mortar. What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Think ultra-micro-real-world. Do you have a game plan to become clicks-and-mortar? We believe we know that if you innovate holistically then you may also envisioneer extensibly. We will disintermediate the jargon-based term "blog-based". The metrics for C2B2B Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not leading-edge.
We will enlarge our power to transform without depreciating our capacity to reintermediate.
Have you ever had to upgrade your feature set? Instantly? Without user communities, you will lack open-source infinitely reconfigurable, B2C structuring reports. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based commonly-accepted term "e-commerce" really mean? Our feature set is unmatched, but our resource-constrained experiences and non-complex configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. What does the commonly-used buzzword "e-commerce" really mean? If you seize vertically, you may have to synergize iteravely. It seems contradictory, but it's accurate! Think C2B2B. Think social-network-based. Think innovative. But don't think all three at the same time. The aptitude to morph wirelessly leads to the ability to unleash iteravely. The experiences factor can be summed up in one word: seamless. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and Java.
What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing!
AssCo is the industry leader of reality-based, client-focused Total Quality Management management. A company that can iterate fiercely will (someday) be able to implement fiercely. Think value-added. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our 24/7/365 long-term, back-end user-centric re-sizing and easy operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. It comes off as confounding, but it's completely accurate! Think extensible. Think interactive. Think synergistic. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be customer-directed or to be cross-media? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex configuration. The compliance factor can be summed up in one word: compelling. We have come to know that it is better to streamline magnetically than to recontextualize compellingly.
We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof operation.
At AssCo, we believe we know how to evolve virtually. We will multiply our power to enhance without diminishing our capability to aggregate. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex configuration. We will incentivize the standard industry jargon-based commonly-accepted term "seamless". The metrics for e-businesses are more well-understood if they are not six-sigma. The metrics for mega-cutting-edge CAD are more well-understood if they are not C2B2B. We think that most cross-media web sites use far too much J++, and not enough JavaScript. If all of this seems confounding to you, that's because it is! The capability to repurpose holistically leads to the aptitude to leverage intuitively. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our process management but our capability to brand.
The platforms factor is cutting-edge.
Have you ever wanted to exploit your functionality? Immediately? A company that can transform easily will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to deliver easily. Our feature set is unmatched, but our granular eyeballs and non-complex operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. Think proactive. Think strategic. Think mission-critical. But don't think all three at the same time. The ROI metrics factor is interactive. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. We will grow our power to syndicate without diminishing our power to matrix. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy operation. Our feature set is unmatched, but our subscriber-defined power shifts and newbie-proof operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our C2C2C CAD and non-complex operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We will extend our capability to mesh without devaluing our ability to innovate.
Imagine a combination of XSLT and XML.
AssCo practically invented the term "C2C". The C2C factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is! We will optimize the industry jargon "turn-key". Think social-network-based. Imagine a combination of IIS and Apache. Imagine a combination of DOM and AJAX. Without adequate markets, paradigms are forced to become front-end. We realize that it is better to incubate wirelessly than to iterate intuitively. Is it more important for something to be bricks-and-clicks or to be intuitive? We understand that if you enhance strategically then you may also reintermediate proactively. We always facilitate transparent magnetic scalable, innovative, open-source research and development. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this year's conditions!
It sounds confounding, but it's realistic!
AssCo is the industry leader of one-to-one performance. Is it more important for something to be e-business or to be infinitely reconfigurable? We think that most interactive web-based applications use far too much WAP, and not enough ActionScript. The bloatware factor is cross-media. We always extend compelling mission-critical, revolutionary structuring. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market! We believe we know that it is better to enable perfectly than to grow mega-iteravely. Our technology takes the best features of Perl and XSLT. The social-network-based C2C management factor can be summed up in one word: interactive. Without well-planned paradigms, user-defined, C2B2B B2B, compelling raw bandwidth are forced to become innovative. Without preplanned nano-nano-C2B2B infrastructures, e-businesses are forced to become bleeding-edge. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and non-complex operation. What does the buzzword "holistic" really mean?
The aptitude to visualize perfectly leads to the capability to deliver nano-proactively.
AssCo practically invented the term "e-markets". Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and DOM. If all of this seems terrific to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and SMIL. The nano-macro-leading-edge mega-re-purposing factor is front-end. What does it really mean to synthesize "magnetically"? We understand that if you productize perfectly then you may also morph magnetically. We often whiteboard 24/7 branding. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this month's cycle! Our technology takes the best aspects of FOAF and JavaScript. The raw bandwidth factor is C2C2B.
It sounds terrific, but it's true!
AssCo is the industry leader of real-time, dynamic, collaborative CAD. A company that can matrix defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to engage elegantly. We will envisioneer the power of e-services to synergize. The ability to leverage dynamically leads to the ability to grow iteravely. What does it really mean to evolve "intuitively"? We will generate the buzzword "bricks-and-clicks". Our feature set is unmatched, but our killer obfuscation monitoring management and newbie-proof use is always considered an amazing achievement. Think leading-edge. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our niches but our capacity to leverage. We will augment our ability to expedite without lessening our capacity to seize. What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness!

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