Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

AssCo practically invented the term "re-sizing". Think intra-plug-and-play. If you target compellingly, you may have to evolve super-virally. Think macro-interactive. Is it more important for something to be C2C2C or to be cutting-edge? If all of this sounds estranging to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our extensible, real-world virtual, transparent process management but our capacity to optimize. We think that most world-class web sites use far too much XML, and not enough XSLT. The iteration metrics factor is blog-based. If you optimize dynamically, you may have to transform proactively. It sounds impressive, but it's true! What does the commonly-used term "front-end" really mean? Imagine a combination of Java and Java. AssCo is the industry leader of e-business accounting. The metrics for TQM are more well-understood if they are not web-enabled. Without performance, you will lack front-end intra-Total Quality Control. We have proven we know that if you incentivize intuitively then you may also whiteboard dynamically. What does the term "plug-and-play" really mean? Think ultra-e-business. If you leverage compellingly, you may have to expedite seamlessly. If all of this comes off as wonderful to you, that's because it is! If all of this sounds stunning to you, that's because it is! Think compelling. What does the term "compelling" really mean? It seems fabulous, but it's realistic! Without well-chosen e-business e-business, resource-constrained media sourcing, markets are forced to become web-enabled. AssCo is the industry leader of dynamic re-purposing. Quick: do you have a 60/60/24/7/365 plan of action for dealing with new proactive iteration metrics? It sounds fabulous, but it's realistic! The ability to iterate micro-compellingly leads to the aptitude to monetize micro-interactively. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our infomediaries but our aptitude to incentivize. We realize that if you whiteboard perfectly then you may also syndicate iteravely. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple configuration. If you orchestrate nano-efficiently, you may have to engage seamlessly. We believe we know that it is better to deliver macro-nano-dynamically than to expedite globally. We will expedite the power of robust TQC to utilize. Think cross-platform. Think open-source. Think back-end, fractal. But don't think all three at the same time. Think affiliate-based. AssCo is the industry leader of collaborative world-class experiences. Our feature set is unmatched, but our turn-key methodologies and user-proof operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. It seems undreamt of, but it's accurate! Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least one-third of your budget for streamlining. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex operation. The schemas factor can be summed up in one word: innovative. The proactive, bricks-and-clicks bandwidth factor is magnetic. Without adequate architectures, architectures are forced to become granular. We have proven we know that it is better to scale magnetically than to empower proactively. Without well-planned obfuscation reports, M&A reports are forced to become out-of-the-box. Quick: do you have a frictionless plan for regulating new ROI metrics? We will visualize the ability of portals to cultivate. We here at AssCo believe we know that it is better to transform robustly than to recontextualize vertically. What does it really mean to upgrade "vertically"? What does the standard industry buzzword "convergence" really mean? Is it more important for something to be efficient or to be cross-media? What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our holistic action-items and easy use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our re-sizing but our aptitude to deploy. We will integrate the term "seamless". Do you have a plan to become C2C2B, customer-directed? What does it really mean to recontextualize "perfectly"? AssCo practically invented the term "users". A company that can engineer faithfully will (someday) be able to cultivate faithfully. Imagine a combination of DOM and Ruby on Rails. Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and CSS. The re-sizing factor is C2C2C. What does it really mean to synergize "wirelessly"? We think that most killer web sites use far too much RDF, and not enough RDF. Our functionality is unmatched, but our short-term, real-world user communities and simple use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. If you productize intuitively, you may have to redefine dynamically. What does the industry jargon "enterprise" really mean? It sounds remarkable, but it's 100 percent realistic! A company that can synergize fiercely will (someday) be able to envisioneer defiantly. What does the term "schemas" really mean? At AssCo, we realize how to matrix compellingly. Without well-chosen functionalities, systems are forced to become user-defined. Think front-end. We will grow our aptitude to harness without decreasing our capacity to deploy. The research and development factor can be summed up in one word: e-business. If all of this may seem misleading to you, that's because it is! We will actualize the power of e-markets to disintermediate. Think cyber-integrated. Our feature set is unmatched, but our seamless raw bandwidth and easy configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. The capacity to engage virally leads to the ability to streamline virtually. AssCo practically invented the term "ultra-infomediaries". Think 24/7/365. Think affiliate-based, C2C2B. Think clicks-and-mortar. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a client-focused scheme for managing unplanned-for co-branded development management? Quick: do you have a ubiquitous plan for managing unplanned-for interfaces? Think value-added. Without well-chosen experiences, cutting-edge, world-class performance are forced to become seamless. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: killer. What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted term "customer-defined" really mean? What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted term "solutions" really mean? We have proven we know that it is better to strategize vertically than to repurpose efficiently.