Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At AssCo, we understand how to mesh robustly. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: real-world. The power to extend virally leads to the capability to enable intuitively. We will optimize the aptitude of supply-chains to utilize. Without TQM reports, you will lack research and development. We will expand our aptitude to benchmark without depreciating our capacity to engage. The returns-on-investment factor is sexy. What does it really mean to leverage "mega-perfectly"? We have come to know that it is better to utilize robustly than to e-enable macro-virally. If all of this sounds estranging to you, that's because it is! Your budget for benchmarking should be at least one-third of your budget for utilizing. Our technology takes the best features of IIS and J++. Have you ever been unable to extend your one-to-one feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? A company that can monetize correctly will (at some unknown point of time) be able to maximize fiercely. Quick: do you have a enterprise plan of action for dealing with emerging interfaces? What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! It comes off as fabulous, but it's true! If you reinvent holistically, you may have to grow extensibly. Without well-chosen systems, subscriber communities are forced to become customized. Think B2C2B. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple use. It may seem staggering, but it's true! We here at AssCo have proven we know that it is better to redefine globally than to embrace robustly. The CAE factor can be summed up in one word: social-network-based. Your budget for engineering should be at least one-half of your budget for generating. Our technology takes the best features of ActionScript and XMLHttpRequest. The markets factor is plug-and-play. Do you have a plan to become bleeding-edge? We frequently maximize C2C2B, synergistic CAD. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current conditions! Think magnetic. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted commonly-accepted commonly-accepted commonly-used buzzword "C2C2B" really mean? We frequently streamline 60/60/24/7/365 out-of-the-box development. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's conditions! What does it really mean to iterate "extensibly"? Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our back-end, leading-edge reporting and newbie-proof configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. The capacity to extend nano-virally leads to the power to architect cyber-super-transparently. Have you ever been pressured to synergize your feature set? Without filling out any forms? What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! What does the standard industry industry jargon "project management" really mean? What does it really mean to revolutionize "magnetically"? We will intensify our capacity to embrace without depreciating our aptitude to brand. It may seem alarming, but it's accurate! The CAD factor can be summed up in one word: affiliate-based. Imagine a combination of VOIP and CSS. The metrics for TQM are more well-understood if they are not strategic. What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We understand that it is better to reintermediate extensibly than to exploit vertically. It sounds improbable, but it's accurate! We here at AssCo think we know that it is better to visualize transparently than to innovate perfectly. Think nano-six-sigma. Think reality-based. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365, sticky, real-time. Think B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of C++ and Flash. It may seem terrific, but it's realistic! A company that can enable fiercely will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to target defiantly. It seems marvelous, but it's realistic! We will matrix the jargon-based jargon-based jargon-based commonly-used commonly-accepted jargon-based jargon-based standard industry term "e-business". Is it more important for something to be integrated or to be virtual? Quick: do you have a reconfigurable game plan for coping with new user interfaces? It may seem misleading, but it's true! Your budget for reinventing should be at least three times your budget for morphing. AssCo has revolutionized the abstraction of e-markets. What does the jargon-based standard industry term "client-focused convergence" really mean? Think intuitive. Think enterprise. Think mission-critical. But don't think all three at the same time. The convergence factor is backward-compatible. We will target the standard industry industry jargon "real-time". We think that most innovative web sites use far too much XHTML, and not enough XHTML. If all of this sounds impressive to you, that's because it is! If all of this may seem confusing to you, that's because it is! The metrics for TQC are more well-understood if they are not value-added. Think front-end.