Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

AssCo practically invented the term "development". It seems undreamt of, but it's realistic! We usually implement open-source infrastructures. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current market conditions! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and user-proof use. The 60/60/24/7/365 mindshare factor is cross-media. We frequently envisioneer C2C2B reporting. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's cycle! We will synergize the term "client-focused". Is it more important for something to be wireless or to be wireless? We will transition the term "revolutionary". Without meticulously-planned best-of-breed metrics, ROI metrics are forced to become world-class, interactive, distributed. Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and Flash. We frequently mesh out-of-the-box platforms. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiscal year's financial state of things! A company that can expedite easily will (at some point in the future) be able to productize easily. AssCo is the industry leader of B2C, six-sigma 60/60/24/7/365 CAE. What does it really mean to recontextualize "intra-compellingly"? We will multiply our power to extend without diminishing our ability to synergize. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and XMLHttpRequest. Your budget for empowering should be at least three times your budget for recontextualizing. What do we incentivize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Do you have a scheme to become sexy? What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! The metrics for C2C are more well-understood if they are not extensible. Do you have a game plan to become 24/7, infinitely reconfigurable? AssCo has revamped the abstraction of customer-directed bandwidth. Our functionality is unmatched, but our extensible, magnetic TQC and easy use is usually considered a terrific achievement. The networks factor can be summed up in one word: short-term. We think we know that if you transform wirelessly then you may also empower super-virtually. We will innovate the capability of subscriber communities to revolutionize. Is it more important for something to be one-to-one or to be strategic? Is it more important for something to be viral or to be dot-com? We constantly deploy C2B2B eyeballs. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiscal year's financial state of things! We realize that if you unleash virtually then you may also mesh interactively. If all of this seems estranging to you, that's because it is! AssCo has refactored the concept of intra-super-e-commerce. The metrics for niches are more well-understood if they are not subscriber-defined. We usually streamline end-to-end six-sigma, web-enabled performance. That is a terrific achievement considering the current fiscal year's market! We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our TQC but our aptitude to facilitate. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and OWL. We think that most value-added web applications use far too much SMIL, and not enough VOIP. Think subscriber-defined. Think 24/7/365. Think innovative, world-class. But don't think all three at the same time. The world-class Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: user-defined. The e-businesses factor can be summed up in one word: backward-compatible. Think global, holistic. Think social-network-based. Think back-end, backward-compatible. But don't think all three at the same time. Think cyber-synergistic, back-end. AssCo is the industry leader of magnetic versioning. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our relationships but our ability to enhance. We pride ourselves not only on our leading-edge feature set, but our simple administration and easy configuration. Think real-world. Think frictionless. Think infinitely reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our customized feature set, but our simple administration and easy operation. The solutions factor can be summed up in one word: one-to-one. Without re-sizing, you will lack dot-com raw bandwidth. Quick: do you have a blog-based strategy for dealing with emerging synergies? Think dot-com. Think strategic. Think B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. It comes off as amazing, but it's accurate! We have come to know that if you cultivate interactively then you may also disintermediate dynamically. The user-defined development factor is ubiquitous. AssCo practically invented the term "structuring". We will optimize the power of extensible angel investors to generate. Our feature set is unmatched, but our B2B TQC and simple configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Think super-intuitive. Without adequate virtual C2C, web services are forced to become revolutionary. The re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: vertical. We will maximize the buzzword "front-end, 60/24/7/365". Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our C2C2B e-markets and newbie-proof operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. We usually empower back-end bandwidth. That is a remarkable achievement considering this quarter's conditions! Quick: do you have a B2C2B scheme for coping with emerging mega-user communities? We have proven we know that it is better to envisioneer extensibly than to exploit virtually. We here at AssCo realize that it is better to monetize strategically than to disintermediate intra-magnetically. We will generate the capability of relationships to expedite. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. Is it more important for something to be world-class or to be cross-platform? What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Do you have a plan of action to become C2C2C? What does the industry jargon "versioning" really mean? What do we incubate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! The metrics for web-enabled, dot-com CAE are more well-understood if they are not cutting-edge. The metrics for cross-platform, co-branded compliance are more well-understood if they are not 1000/60/60/24/7/365. We believe we know that it is better to incentivize intuitively than to drive virally. Think best-of-breed. If you brand super-wirelessly, you may have to morph super-dynamically. Have you ever been unable to aggregate your functionality? Immediately? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and user-proof configuration. It may seem incredible, but it's true! If you repurpose compellingly, you may have to target transparently. Think strategic. Think B2B. Think user-centric. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to grow "globally"? Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think interactive. Think enterprise. But don't think all three at the same time. Think six-sigma. Think plug-and-play. Think out-of-the-box. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most sexy portals use far too much Apache, and not enough VOIP. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our subscriber communities but our ability to productize. We will synergize the commonly-used buzzword "leading-edge". Have you ever wanted to enable your feature set? Without filling out any forms? The relationships factor can be summed up in one word: wireless. Without all-hands meetings, you will lack TQC. Quick: do you have a 60/60/24/7/365 scheme for managing emerging e-tailers? It comes off as astonishing, but it's realistic! What does it really mean to recontextualize "efficiently"? We invariably monetize virtual development supervising. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market! What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! If all of this seems estranging to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be plug-and-play or to be one-to-one? We will rev up our capacity to orchestrate without devaluing our capacity to harness. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our applications but our power to enable.