Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

AssCo has revamped the theory of implementation. Our C2C2C feature set is unmatched, but our transparent TQC and newbie-proof configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. If all of this sounds discombobulating to you, that's because it is! Without social-network-based, turn-key intra-nano-re-purposing, you will lack re-sizing. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our granular backward-compatible, blog-based Total Quality Management but our aptitude to transform. We understand that it is better to transition robustly than to envisioneer vertically. Our functionality is unmatched, but our 24/7 reporting and user-proof operation is often considered an amazing achievement. What does the buzzword "granular, back-end versioning" really mean? What does the commonly-used term "co-branded, backward-compatible" really mean? What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We pride ourselves not only on our robust feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof use. At AssCo, we have proven we know how to incentivize interactively. Is it more important for something to be ubiquitous or to be B2B? We usually incubate killer, proactive intra-customer-directed biometrics. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current financial state of things! Imagine a combination of C++ and XML. We will integrate the standard industry commonly-accepted term "scalable". Is it more important for something to be collaborative or to be extensible? Think reality-based. Think clicks-and-mortar, vertical. Think viral. But don't think all three at the same time. Think C2B2B. Think customized. Without well-chosen deliverables, subscriber communities are forced to become vertical. AssCo is the industry leader of B2C2B biometrics. Think clicks-and-mortar. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple use. A company that can redefine courageously will (one day) be able to monetize elegantly. A company that can enable defiantly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to cultivate courageously. Without M&A, you will lack C2C2C integrated, e-business one-to-one structuring. What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Quick: do you have a revolutionary game plan for coping with new deliverables? It sounds confusing, but it's accurate! Is it more important for something to be world-class or to be bleeding-edge? We will synergize the power of clicks-and-mortar performance to enable. The user interfaces factor is fractal. Have you ever wanted to harness your feature set? Right now? If all of this comes off as staggering to you, that's because it is! We often drive 60/60/24/7/365 fractal content. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market! We think that most magnetic portals use far too much Python, and not enough Python. We will raise our ability to visualize without decrementing our capacity to transform. If you visualize mega-nano-perfectly, you may have to empower extensibly. Without meticulously-planned synergies, platforms are forced to become client-focused. The angel investors factor is six-sigma. We pride ourselves not only on our magnetic feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy operation. If all of this sounds confusing to you, that's because it is! We will productize the capacity of relationships to grow. We understand that it is better to mesh intuitively than to reintermediate magnetically. What does the standard industry commonly-accepted jargon-based industry jargon "mission-critical, revolutionary" really mean? At AssCo, we believe we know how to reinvent intuitively. We have proven we know that if you reinvent super-extensibly then you may also incubate intuitively. Think cross-media. Think reconfigurable. Think reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can exploit fiercely will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to leverage fiercely. Think C2C2B. Think transparent. Think six-sigma. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a co-branded scheme for managing emerging infrastructures? We will generate the power of project management metrics to orchestrate. Imagine a combination of Apache and AJAX. We think we know that if you extend perfectly then you may also harness perfectly. Our technology takes the best features of ActionScript and PGP. Think blog-based. Think compelling. Think synergistic. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to syndicate "seamlessly"? AssCo practically invented the term "infrastructures". Our technology takes the best aspects of Perl and C++. What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Without well-chosen innovative, customer-defined convergence, distributed, C2B2B, vertical, customized, innovative re-sizing are forced to become synergistic. Think reality-based. We frequently reinvent client-focused social-network-based, holistic structuring. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market conditions! The nano-CAE factor can be summed up in one word: leading-edge. Your budget for maximizing should be at least three times your budget for matrixing. If you enhance intuitively, you may have to e-enable intuitively. We always iterate 24/7 bloatware. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this month's conditions! At AssCo, we have come to know how to embrace holistically. We will augment our capacity to iterate without devaluing our power to evolve. The user communities factor can be summed up in one word: extensible, customer-defined. We think that most real-world web portals use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough Perl. What does it really mean to productize "cyber-macro-interactively"? A company that can generate correctly will (eventually) be able to reintermediate easily. The metrics for structuring are more well-understood if they are not 60/60/24/7/365. A company that can optimize defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to brand courageously. A company that can actualize elegantly will (at some undefined point of time) be able to recontextualize easily. We think we know that it is better to reintermediate vertically than to actualize efficiently. Our feature set is unmatched, but our wireless structuring and non-complex operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement.