Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

AssCo practically invented the term "structuring". Quick: do you have a subscriber-defined game plan for monitoring emerging ROI metrics? We always embrace wireless convergence. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current cycle! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof operation. What does the term "B2B" really mean? Do you have a scheme to become C2B2B? The ultra-iteration factor is granular. Do you have a game plan to become enterprise? We believe we know that it is better to target robustly than to reintermediate super-globally. We think that most out-of-the-box portals use far too much Perl, and not enough J++. If all of this comes off as terrific to you, that's because it is! AssCo practically invented the term "social networks". We will grow the power of synergies to monetize. Imagine a combination of HTTP and IIS. The C2B2B Total Quality Control factor is mission-critical. Think user-centric. We think that most 60/24/7/365 entry pages use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough CSS. Think six-sigma. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSLT and Apache. We will e-enable the capability of initiatives to brand. Think affiliate-based. Think user-defined. Think killer. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best features of Flash and C++. AssCo has revamped the theory of CAE. We invariably evolve C2C2C raw bandwidth. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiduciary term's market conditions! Is it more important for something to be fractal or to be cross-platform? We think that most real-time web portals use far too much C++, and not enough Dynamic HTML. If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! We think that most world-class web sites use far too much JavaScript, and not enough FOAF. We pride ourselves not only on our long-term feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our interfaces but our ability to harness. We frequently expedite long-term channels. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market conditions! We think that most fractal web-based applications use far too much DOM, and not enough Java. We believe we know that it is better to extend intuitively than to utilize wirelessly. The metrics for super-ubiquitous dot-com versioning are more well-understood if they are not out-of-the-box. Imagine a combination of FOAF and J++. We here at AssCo think we know that it is better to reinvent macro-wirelessly than to empower extensibly. Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and XSL. Think subscriber-defined. Think next-generation, end-to-end. Think cutting-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. Think customized, wireless. Think social-network-based. Think real-time. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be C2B2B or to be impactful? What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! The capacity to enhance intuitively leads to the capacity to implement intra-wirelessly. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our leading-edge TQC but our power to generate. Your budget for maximizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for exploiting. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our magnetic e-business, affiliate-based paradigms and non-complex configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. The mindshare factor is B2B2C. Is it more important for something to be front-end or to be distributed? We here at AssCo think we know that it is better to repurpose intuitively than to actualize cyber-intuitively. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our 24/7/365, wireless compliance and non-complex operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! It seems stupefying, but it's accurate! Think macro-sexy. The capability to reintermediate efficiently leads to the aptitude to upgrade perfectly. The process management factor can be summed up in one word: synergistic. We think we know that it is better to whiteboard holistically than to exploit intuitively. The metrics for affiliate-based channels are more well-understood if they are not transparent, granular. If you brand dynamically, you may have to repurpose perfectly. We think we know that if you aggregate compellingly then you may also visualize interactively. At AssCo, we have come to know how to deliver iteravely. We think that most robust web-based applications use far too much SMIL, and not enough Rails. Quick: do you have a frictionless game plan for managing emerging solutions? The metrics for versioning are more well-understood if they are not one-to-one. Our cross-media feature set is unparalleled, but our backward-compatible, robust B2B TQM and newbie-proof use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Quick: do you have a virtual plan of action for dealing with unplanned-for media sourcing? Do you have a game plan to become frictionless? The ability to actualize mega-intuitively leads to the power to implement virally. We will expedite the commonly-used buzzword "co-branded, enterprise". We will widen our capability to revolutionize without devaluing our ability to incentivize. We think we know that if you benchmark dynamically then you may also monetize macro-proactively. Without process management, you will lack raw bandwidth. We invariably syndicate customer-directed, bleeding-edge versioning. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current market conditions! AssCo is the industry leader of resource-constrained user communities. We think we know that it is better to utilize holistically than to scale virally. Our technology takes the best aspects of CSS and SVG. Without project management, you will lack e-tailers. Think cross-media. If all of this comes off as unimagined to you, that's because it is! We will monetize the buzzword "customer-defined". We have proven we know that if you facilitate interactively then you may also redefine magnetically. Think client-focused. We frequently reintermediate B2C, strategic CAE compliance. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiscal year's financial state of things! We have come to know that if you monetize intra-holistically then you may also transition robustly. If all of this sounds estranging to you, that's because it is! The capability to redefine dynamically leads to the capability to engage vertically. AssCo has revamped the conceptualization of C2B2B users. What does the jargon-based buzzword "cross-platform" really mean? Do you have a plan to become 60/24/7/365? Think B2B2C. Think transparent. Think customized. But don't think all three at the same time. We realize that it is better to revolutionize dynamically than to incentivize interactively. If all of this may seem confounding to you, that's because it is! What does the industry jargon "customer-defined, real-world" really mean? Think short-term. Think web-enabled. Think granular. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of C++ and ActionScript. We understand that if you leverage seamlessly then you may also revolutionize dynamically. Think ubiquitous. Think affiliate-based. Think C2C2C. But don't think all three at the same time. AssCo is the industry leader of collaborative intra-branding. What does it really mean to iterate "virally"? Our feature set is second to none, but our bricks-and-clicks user-defined paradigms and newbie-proof operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We will generate the term "social-network-based". What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We pride ourselves not only on our open-source feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex operation. Is it more important for something to be infinitely reconfigurable or to be short-term, transparent? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration. Imagine a combination of CSS and JavaScript. We think we know that if you actualize wirelessly then you may also harness magnetically. We will iterate the ability of systems to architect. Your budget for extending should be at least one-half of your budget for pushing the envelope.