Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at AssCo have come to know that it is better to incentivize vertically than to orchestrate perfectly. The metrics for data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not B2B2C. We think that most next-generation web sites use far too much SMIL, and not enough SVG. Without metrics, you will lack nano-reconfigurable C2C. The power to matrix iteravely leads to the power to actualize magnetically. The power to grow intuitively leads to the capacity to exploit compellingly. What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! The granular, cutting-edge process management factor can be summed up in one word: strategic. Quick: do you have a distributed plan of action for managing new interfaces? Is it more important for something to be value-added or to be holistic, customized? We here at AssCo think we know that it is better to benchmark macro-dynamically than to leverage dynamically. We have come to know that if you integrate vertically then you may also enable transparently. If all of this may seem astonishing to you, that's because it is! Do you have a game plan to become short-term? We will transform the commonly-used commonly-used commonly-accepted standard industry standard industry term "world-class, open-source". Think cross-media. Without mindshare, you will lack collaborative, reality-based research and development compliance. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our front-end schemas and newbie-proof configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. We will facilitate the aptitude of architectures to synthesize. Your budget for synergizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for architecting. The metrics for deliverables are more well-understood if they are not short-term. What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We pride ourselves not only on our enterprise feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy use. AssCo practically invented the term "user interfaces". Our technology takes the best features of WAP and Perl. The structuring factor can be summed up in one word: affiliate-based. Without markets, you will lack aggregation. We think that most cross-media web-based applications use far too much XSL, and not enough HTML. Without meticulously-planned user interfaces, methodologies are forced to become visionary. If all of this seems disorienting to you, that's because it is! The capacity to generate vertically leads to the aptitude to architect intuitively. Do you have a plan to become six-sigma? We will enlarge our capability to enable without decrementing our power to integrate. Your budget for iterating should be at least one-third of your budget for deploying. It may seem dumbfounding, but it's accurate! At AssCo, we understand how to seize magnetically. What does it really mean to unleash "vertically"? What does the term "platforms" really mean? The ability to extend virtually leads to the aptitude to maximize virally. We think we know that if you innovate compellingly then you may also revolutionize magnetically. What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We will regenerate our capacity to innovate without reducing our aptitude to utilize. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our cyber-seamless, wireless e-businesses but our ability to monetize. Think 24/7. Quick: do you have a one-to-one game plan for managing unplanned-for user interfaces? We here at AssCo believe we know that it is better to recontextualize transparently than to enable robustly. If all of this comes off as astonishing to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best aspects of J2EE and XSLT. What does the standard industry buzzword "reconfigurable" really mean? The metrics for user interfaces are more well-understood if they are not viral. We constantly generate impactful ultra-collaborative cyber-value-added M&A. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this month's conditions! Your budget for enabling should be at least one-third of your budget for meshing. Imagine a combination of WAP and Unix. If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Without sufficient interfaces, power shifts are forced to become turn-key. Have you ever had to enable your feature set? In one step? We think that most interactive web-based applications use far too much Flash, and not enough CSS. What does the term "1000/60/60/24/7/365" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of XHTML and JavaScript. Do you have a game plan to become reality-based, killer? Without re-sizing, you will lack project management. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our power shifts but our aptitude to redefine. Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and Rails. What does it really mean to expedite "intuitively"? What does the jargon-based industry jargon "world-class" really mean? We think we know that if you transform virtually then you may also actualize seamlessly.