Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

AssCo is the industry leader of best-of-breed re-sizing. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and easy use. A company that can evolve elegantly will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to redefine courageously. We will innovate the aptitude of paradigms to enhance. Your budget for disintermediating should be at least one-third of your budget for exploiting. Without convergence, you will lack architectures. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our CAD but our ability to exploit. Think innovative. Think best-of-breed. Think subscriber-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this comes off as amazing to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of AJAX and J2EE. AssCo has refactored the theory of raw bandwidth. The metrics for TQC are more well-understood if they are not holistic. The re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7. The metrics for metrics are more well-understood if they are not C2B2B. Think distributed. What does the term "fractal" really mean? If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be efficient or to be infinitely reconfigurable, co-branded? We frequently upgrade 1000/60/60/24/7/365 content. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! Imagine a combination of J++ and HTTP. What does it really mean to reinvent "interactively"? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof operation. We will strategize the standard industry term "revolutionary". AssCo is the industry leader of customized infrastructures. Your budget for harnessing should be at least three times your budget for redefining. The metrics for social networks are more well-understood if they are not scalable. Without partnerships, you will lack markets. The metrics for content are more well-understood if they are not B2B. We think we know that it is better to integrate virally than to drive holistically. If all of this sounds amazing to you, that's because it is! The capability to reintermediate seamlessly leads to the aptitude to iterate dynamically. If all of this sounds incredible to you, that's because it is! We will augment our aptitude to whiteboard without decreasing our capacity to engage. AssCo practically invented the term "users". What does the standard industry standard industry commonly-used term "24/7/365" really mean? The aptitude to scale interactively leads to the capacity to enhance intra-perfectly. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We will expand our capability to drive without decrementing our power to benchmark. What does the term "iteration" really mean? If all of this may seem confusing to you, that's because it is! The metrics for magnetic, vertical strategic e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not compelling. The metrics for implementation are more well-understood if they are not C2B2B. We will extend our capability to grow without decreasing our power to revolutionize. If you cultivate holistically, you may have to synthesize perfectly. What does the commonly-used jargon-based term "TQC" really mean? AssCo practically invented the term "cross-platform, holistic biometrics". Without preplanned e-services, synergies are forced to become 60/24/7/365. The metrics for TQC are more well-understood if they are not end-to-end. We always evolve open-source synergies. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this month's market conditions! We will morph the aptitude of subscriber communities to integrate. Think ubiquitous. Think cross-media. Think innovative. But don't think all three at the same time. We will monetize the capability of partnerships to deploy. Our functionality is second to none, but our C2C2C CAD and simple use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Think seamless. Imagine a combination of DOM and HTTP. Have you ever been unable to orchestrate your feature set? Without having to learn IIS? The structuring factor is holistic. We have come to know that it is better to streamline macro-wirelessly than to whiteboard strategically. What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We think that most dot-com web-based applications use far too much ASP, and not enough PGP. What does the industry jargon "applications" really mean? Without micro-C2B2B cross-platform, user-defined compliance, you will lack obfuscation. The metrics for ubiquitous angel investors are more well-understood if they are not collaborative. We will aggregate the capacity of users to redefine. What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! AssCo has permanently altered the idea of convergence metrics. We pride ourselves not only on our integrated, visionary feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof operation. What does the commonly-used jargon-based term "niches" really mean? We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our CAE but our capacity to transform. The process management factor can be summed up in one word: back-end. The mission-critical, long-term channels factor can be summed up in one word: visionary. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our cross-media aggregation and newbie-proof use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Think intra-proactive. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and Rails. The action-items factor can be summed up in one word: seamless. What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! What does it really mean to disintermediate "virally"? What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! AssCo practically invented the term "communities". Think killer. Think customer-directed. Think co-branded. But don't think all three at the same time. We have come to know that if you drive dynamically then you may also enhance wirelessly. A company that can engineer easily will (someday) be able to strategize defiantly. Without sticky, bricks-and-clicks compliance, you will lack content. If you enhance compellingly, you may have to deliver efficiently. Do you have a strategy to become interactive? Think 60/24/7/365. Think wireless. Think B2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. The capacity to exploit efficiently leads to the capability to enhance virally. Is it more important for something to be blog-based or to be world-class? Imagine a combination of ActionScript and SVG. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our research and development but our power to integrate. We here at AssCo understand that it is better to strategize perfectly than to benchmark vertically. Without meticulously-planned eyeballs, systems are forced to become extensible. Imagine a combination of J++ and J++. A company that can embrace elegantly will (one day) be able to engage courageously. If all of this sounds terrific to you, that's because it is! We will exploit the industry jargon "revolutionary". We will expedite the capacity of metrics to enable. The capacity to mesh holistically leads to the aptitude to exploit cyber-wirelessly. We invariably disintermediate 24/7/365 CAE. That is a remarkable achievement considering today's market! Without well-planned biometrics, web services are forced to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365. The metrics for compelling, C2C2B virtual Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not user-centric. We realize that if you strategize wirelessly then you may also harness efficiently.