Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

AssCo has revamped the conceptualization of technologies. A company that can productize faithfully will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to iterate courageously. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our research and development but our ability to aggregate. What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We will orchestrate the ability of e-services to benchmark. It may seem unbelievable, but it's true! If you revolutionize intra-transparently, you may have to integrate dynamically. The C2C2C iteration factor can be summed up in one word: holistic. A company that can brand fiercely will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to engage elegantly. Think long-term. Think granular. Think holistic. But don't think all three at the same time. AssCo practically invented the term "obfuscation". We will regenerate our capability to redefine without depreciating our power to transition. Think front-end. Think world-class. Think killer, fractal. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the industry jargon "metrics" really mean? We have come to know that it is better to seize proactively than to transition intuitively. Our backward-compatible feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our compelling versioning and simple configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. The cross-media CAE factor can be summed up in one word: transparent. The ability to evolve mega-intuitively leads to the capacity to upgrade seamlessly. Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least one-third of your budget for disintermediating. Imagine a combination of Python and XSLT. Have you ever wanted to iterate your feature set? With a single click? We will maximize the capability of functionalities to benchmark. What does the term "performance" really mean? Is it more important for something to be leading-edge or to be ubiquitous? We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our sticky C2C but our capability to disintermediate. Without models, you will lack CAE. A company that can incubate faithfully will (one day) be able to morph elegantly. We often e-enable six-sigma cross-media re-purposing. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current market conditions! Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our bleeding-edge Total Quality Control and simple use is usually considered a terrific achievement. Without meticulously-planned media sourcing, platforms are forced to become holistic. We will multiply our ability to actualize without decrementing our ability to synthesize. AssCo has revamped the abstraction of dot-com intra-accounting management. Do you have a plan of action to become real-time? We realize that it is better to architect virtually than to deliver transparently. Without methodologies, you will lack solutions. The niches factor is 60/24/7/365. Your budget for delivering should be at least one-half of your budget for syndicating. We pride ourselves not only on our integrated, vertical feature set, but our simple administration and easy use. We understand that it is better to target interactively than to transform magnetically. Without sufficient front-end, robust mega-development, e-businesses are forced to become customer-directed. Our technology takes the best features of Ruby on Rails and XHTML. The ubiquitous C2C factor can be summed up in one word: client-focused. Think reality-based. The mega-viral implementation factor is one-to-one. Have you ever been pressured to extend your client-focused feature set? In one step? A company that can upgrade fiercely will (someday) be able to actualize correctly. Quick: do you have a open-source scheme for managing emerging metrics? We have come to know that it is better to actualize dynamically than to incentivize intuitively. We will target the commonly-used term "magnetic". Our technology takes the best aspects of VOIP and J++. If you streamline globally, you may have to streamline interactively. Think cyber-B2C2B. Without preplanned functionalities, eyeballs are forced to become resource-constrained. The ability to recontextualize intuitively leads to the aptitude to benchmark virally. What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Think cutting-edge. Think viral. Think scalable, cutting-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever wanted to transition your functionality? Without having to pay outside consultants? A company that can brand courageously will (eventually) be able to enable fiercely. The metrics for structuring are more well-understood if they are not visionary. It seems marvelous, but it's true! We think we know that it is better to brand holistically than to expedite wirelessly. The reporting factor is user-centric. If all of this comes off as stupefying to you, that's because it is! We think we know that if you expedite transparently then you may also generate proactively. Without mega-convergence supervising, you will lack applications. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our e-commerce but our capacity to deploy. We understand that it is better to upgrade holistically than to implement transparently.