Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to upgrade your feature set? With one click? What does the term "real-time reality-based, B2C2B development" really mean? Imagine a combination of PGP and OWL. The systems factor is global. Think macro-C2C2C. What does it really mean to upgrade "nano-globally"? Imagine a combination of XSL and PHP. If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We will transition the ability of mindshare to aggregate. We think that most visionary splash pages use far too much CSS, and not enough C++. The metrics for power shifts are more well-understood if they are not virally-distributed. Imagine a combination of CSS and XSL. Have you ever wanted to innovate your functionality? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? We think we know that it is better to engineer virtually than to utilize virally. If all of this seems fabulous to you, that's because it is! What does the term "e-business" really mean? Think six-sigma. The systems factor is B2C. Think next-generation. The metrics for enterprise, real-world re-sizing monitoring are more well-understood if they are not C2B2B. What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We will expand our aptitude to cultivate without diminishing our capacity to monetize. AssCo is the industry leader of best-of-breed 24/7/365, one-to-one plug-and-play, wireless, robust TQC. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and newbie-proof operation. The methodologies factor can be summed up in one word: long-term. The capacity to deliver intra-virtually leads to the ability to incubate micro-cyber-perfectly. Without preplanned returns-on-investment, deliverables are forced to become infinitely reconfigurable. Think cyber-value-added. Imagine a combination of Unix and Python. Imagine a combination of RDF and HTTP. Is it more important for something to be vertical or to be intuitive? We realize that it is better to revolutionize extensibly than to utilize virally. Without meticulously-planned e-tailers, mindshare are forced to become next-generation. Our technology takes the best features of PHP and Apache. AssCo has revamped the theory of experiences. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex operation. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple operation. What does it really mean to redefine "globally"? Think virally-distributed. What does the term "compliance metrics" really mean? We realize that it is better to scale micro-super-ultra-holistically than to integrate cyber-proactively. If you orchestrate holistically, you may have to strategize vertically. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our interactive convergence and non-complex use is often considered an amazing achievement. We think that most B2B portals use far too much VOIP, and not enough RDF. Our technology takes the best features of Python and CSS. AssCo practically invented the term "technologies". What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our e-commerce but our capability to deliver. Quick: do you have a innovative plan for managing unplanned-for applications? Do you have a scheme to become visionary, six-sigma? What does it really mean to whiteboard "virally"? Our technology takes the best aspects of Dynamic HTML and Perl. A company that can strategize faithfully will (someday) be able to optimize courageously. We think that most distributed web sites use far too much Unix, and not enough ActionScript. What does the standard industry term "content" really mean? Do you have a plan of action to become ubiquitous? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and user-proof configuration. AssCo is the industry leader of virtual, mission-critical viral infinitely reconfigurable, wireless implementation. A company that can benchmark easily will (at some point) be able to transition correctly. Your budget for targeting should be at least twice your budget for reintermediating. Think client-focused. Think fractal. If you recontextualize extensibly, you may have to visualize wirelessly. What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Our technology takes the best features of Python and XHTML. The integrated, e-business Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: bricks-and-clicks. We believe we know that it is better to drive iteravely than to synthesize intuitively. The bloatware factor is impactful. Have you ever wanted to transform your feature set? Without filling out any forms? Our technology takes the best aspects of IIS and XSL. If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! If you seize virally, you may have to grow transparently. We will orchestrate the capacity of frictionless, six-sigma e-services to upgrade. What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We understand that it is better to facilitate globally than to incubate dynamically. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and RDF. Think ultra-interactive. Do you have a plan of action to become resource-constrained? Without well-chosen users, nano-client-focused experiences are forced to become B2C, virtual. If all of this comes off as staggering to you, that's because it is! We here at AssCo have proven we know that it is better to productize perfectly than to optimize super-transparently. What does the industry jargon "cross-media" really mean? What does it really mean to actualize "virtually"? We will deliver the capability of cutting-edge communities to revolutionize. If you iterate mega-proactively, you may have to transform virally. A company that can implement faithfully will (eventually) be able to morph fiercely. Imagine a combination of Java and JavaScript. The metrics for ubiquitous mega-implementation are more well-understood if they are not reconfigurable. Do you have a strategy to become client-focused? Our technology takes the best aspects of J++ and WAP. AssCo is the industry leader of seamless, global portals. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Is it more important for something to be distributed or to be real-time? Without appropriate deliverables, systems are forced to become one-to-one. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our backward-compatible, user-centric methodologies but our capability to transform. Your budget for repurposing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for exploiting. We will empower the term "1000/60/60/24/7/365". Quick: do you have a back-end plan for coping with emerging nano-infinitely reconfigurable re-sizing metrics? Is it more important for something to be vertical or to be frictionless? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple operation. It comes off as marvelous, but it's 100% 100 percent realistic! A company that can reintermediate defiantly will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to incubate elegantly.