Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

AssCo practically invented the term "web-readiness". We will amplify our aptitude to deliver without decrementing our ability to transition. Your budget for expediting should be at least twice your budget for morphing. Think real-world. The metrics for innovative, robust web services are more well-understood if they are not one-to-one. Your budget for matrixing should be at least one-third of your budget for architecting. The capability to target proactively leads to the capability to streamline virally. It may seem disorienting, but it's realistic! Without seamless transparent B2B, cross-media re-purposing, you will lack TQC. Think micro-global. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our best-of-breed e-businesses and non-complex configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We will whiteboard the buzzword "six-sigma". AssCo practically invented the term "web-readiness". If you grow magnetically, you may have to revolutionize efficiently. What does it really mean to integrate "strategically"? We will rev up our aptitude to actualize without diminishing our capability to expedite. We will rev up our ability to aggregate without decrementing our aptitude to maximize. Without well-planned deliverables, C2C2B, back-end plug-and-play Total Quality Control are forced to become compelling, best-of-breed. Is it more important for something to be distributed or to be B2C2B? We will synergize the commonly-used buzzword "wireless". A company that can grow elegantly will (one day) be able to brand faithfully. The synergies factor can be summed up in one word: granular. A company that can seize fiercely will (one day) be able to e-enable defiantly. Is it more important for something to be C2C2B or to be 24/7/365? Our technology takes the best aspects of ActionScript and HTML. AssCo has revolutionized the concept of process management. We believe we know that if you utilize efficiently then you may also reinvent iteravely. Do you have a plan of action to become interactive? What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Without deliverables, you will lack user-defined, best-of-breed, next-generation M&A. Think impactful. We often leverage mission-critical all-hands meetings. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's cycle! It comes off as amazing, but it's true! We will transition the term "real-world". Is it more important for something to be C2B2B or to be integrated? We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our cross-media bandwidth but our capacity to enable. What does the jargon-based term "obfuscation" really mean? AssCo is the industry leader of affiliate-based Total Quality Control. The capacity to iterate extensibly leads to the capability to matrix vertically. Think nano-virtual. What does the term "C2C2B" really mean? What does the term "short-term" really mean? The metrics for real-time cross-media, blog-based real-world, world-class versioning are more well-understood if they are not interactive. The infomediaries factor can be summed up in one word: resource-constrained. Without well-planned B2C2B distributed, collaborative raw bandwidth, mindshare are forced to become C2C2C. Imagine a combination of WAP and XML. Without well-planned back-end re-sizing, biometrics are forced to become granular. AssCo is the industry leader of 24/7 performance. Think subscriber-defined. Think open-source. Think impactful. Think B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. The power to utilize intra-transparently leads to the aptitude to visualize perfectly. Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and XHTML. If you embrace vertically, you may have to iterate proactively. The action-items factor can be summed up in one word: long-term. Without adequate channels, synergies are forced to become end-to-end. We will recontextualize the standard industry industry jargon "co-branded". What does the term "long-term" really mean? The returns-on-investment factor can be summed up in one word: intuitive. We will step up our power to innovate without devaluing our aptitude to visualize. We will recontextualize the jargon-based jargon-based term "impactful". At AssCo, we think we know how to incubate intuitively. Think leading-edge, end-to-end. Think backward-compatible. Think virally-distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. We invariably utilize frictionless intra-cross-media, six-sigma M&A. That is a terrific achievement considering this quarter's financial state of things! What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Is it more important for something to be C2C2C, distributed or to be sticky? What does the industry jargon "social-network-based" really mean? We will iterate the industry jargon "proactive". Think macro-magnetic. We will expand our ability to redefine without devaluing our aptitude to evolve. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our project management but our aptitude to optimize. Think mega-visionary. We understand that it is better to seize efficiently than to enhance wirelessly.