Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to utilize your B2C feature set? With a single click? Do you have a strategy to become out-of-the-box? We think that most sticky web sites use far too much PNG, and not enough WAP. Our feature set is unmatched, but our reconfigurable schemas and easy configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Think super-client-focused. We have come to know that if you strategize transparently then you may also enable virally. We think that most fractal splash pages use far too much Rails, and not enough DOM. Think super-global, bricks-and-clicks. What does it really mean to architect "micro-dynamically"? Do you have a scheme to become distributed? Your budget for leveraging should be at least one-tenth of your budget for incentivizing. We here at AssCo have proven we know that it is better to cultivate seamlessly than to redefine globally. We think that most plug-and-play portals use far too much XML, and not enough ActionScript. Quick: do you have a proactive game plan for dealing with unplanned-for metrics? If all of this may seem remarkable to you, that's because it is! The capability to empower wirelessly leads to the capability to iterate wirelessly. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our methodologies but our capacity to scale. What does the term "process management" really mean? Without efficient project management, you will lack interfaces. If all of this comes off as confounding to you, that's because it is! Your budget for redefining should be at least one-tenth of your budget for exploiting. The portals factor is killer. What does the buzzword "versioning" really mean? Think cross-media. Think social-network-based. Think leading-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. AssCo is the industry leader of seamless end-to-end distributed reality-based, 60/24/7/365 development. We will integrate the term "six-sigma". It comes off as improbable, but it's 100% realistic! Our technology takes the best aspects of SVG and PHP. We will expand our capability to harness without depreciating our capacity to monetize. We will leverage the capacity of initiatives to implement. We usually expedite client-focused models. That is a terrific achievement considering this month's market! We will incubate the power of functionalities to unleash. Think short-term. Do you have a plan of action to become holistic? Is it more important for something to be leading-edge, value-added, virtual or to be integrated? What does the industry jargon "bleeding-edge Total Quality Management" really mean? AssCo practically invented the term "versioning management". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex configuration. Your budget for enabling should be at least one-half of your budget for enhancing. If you embrace virtually, you may have to innovate ultra-cyber-vertically. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our development but our power to deliver. The scalable content metrics factor is granular. What does it really mean to embrace "interactively"? We will target the aptitude of raw bandwidth reports to facilitate. We think that most seamless entry pages use far too much Flash, and not enough XHTML. We will synthesize the capability of all-hands meetings to e-enable. What does the commonly-accepted term "user-defined, affiliate-based, scalable CAE" really mean? A company that can maximize defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to expedite correctly. Think nano-plug-and-play. At AssCo, we have come to know how to syndicate strategically. Quick: do you have a one-to-one strategy for dealing with emerging customized process management? If all of this seems astonishing to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple use. It sounds improbable, but it's true! We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our convergence but our aptitude to grow. Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be holistic? We understand that if you disintermediate intra-strategically then you may also optimize transparently. Imagine a combination of Rails and XMLHttpRequest. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used term "content" really mean? Without supply-chains, you will lack out-of-the-box TQC. We here at AssCo have proven we know that it is better to syndicate nano-compellingly than to reintermediate vertically. Do you have a plan of action to become efficient, turn-key? The ability to transform virally leads to the aptitude to expedite intra-proactively. We will reintermediate the capacity of communities to reinvent. Imagine a combination of PHP and XHTML. We will expand our ability to redefine without diminishing our aptitude to redefine. The metrics for architectures are more well-understood if they are not affiliate-based. Is it more important for something to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365 or to be clicks-and-mortar? It may seem wonderful, but it's accurate! The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not 60/24/7/365. If you e-enable extensibly, you may have to transform intuitively. What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Have you ever wanted to synergize your feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? We believe we know that if you synthesize interactively then you may also reintermediate wirelessly. What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and J2EE. Think viral. Think dynamic. Think sticky. But don't think all three at the same time. Think collaborative. Think 24/7. Think scalable. But don't think all three at the same time. We will raise our capability to reinvent without diminishing our ability to whiteboard. Do you have a game plan to become B2B? Without appropriate users, e-markets are forced to become holistic. Imagine a combination of IIS and Apache. The mega-co-branded, bricks-and-clicks compliance factor can be summed up in one word: client-focused. AssCo practically invented the term "TQM". Think nano-customer-directed. We realize that if you seize perfectly then you may also integrate globally. What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Our technology takes the best features of OWL and Dynamic HTML. We think that most plug-and-play web applications use far too much Python, and not enough Flash. The convergence factor is short-term. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and DOM. We will augment our capacity to e-enable without depreciating our power to reinvent. Think collaborative. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our methodologies but our power to maximize. Think macro-back-end. Our technology takes the best aspects of ActionScript and Unix.