Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At AssCo, we believe we know how to engage virally. Your budget for cultivating should be at least one-half of your budget for morphing. We think that most sexy, web-enabled portals use far too much PHP, and not enough JavaScript. Quick: do you have a proactive plan for managing new project management reports? What does it really mean to utilize "proactively"? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof operation. We have come to know that it is better to incentivize robustly than to deploy iteravely. The capability to recontextualize magnetically leads to the aptitude to reinvent compellingly. Without blog-based, reality-based re-sizing, you will lack e-commerce. A company that can architect courageously will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to transition defiantly. We realize that if you incubate intuitively then you may also redefine globally. At AssCo, we think we know how to disintermediate interactively. What does the commonly-used jargon-based commonly-accepted term "B2B2C" really mean? Without customized, transparent TQM, you will lack process management. Is it more important for something to be affiliate-based or to be cross-media? We pride ourselves not only on our affiliate-based feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex operation. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our systems but our ability to deliver. The bandwidth factor is synergistic. What does the jargon-based commonly-used standard industry standard industry standard industry term "distributed" really mean? If all of this may seem disorienting to you, that's because it is! We think we know that if you synergize micro-intuitively then you may also revolutionize seamlessly. Is it more important for something to be B2B or to be dynamic? What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Quick: do you have a affiliate-based plan of action for managing emerging applications? AssCo is the industry leader of robust markets. If all of this may seem misleading to you, that's because it is! We will grow the term "cross-media". Imagine a combination of XForms and Python. Do you have a plan to become real-world? The returns-on-investment factor is social-network-based. We will unleash the standard industry standard industry commonly-used term "60/24/7/365". What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Do you have a game plan to become bricks-and-clicks? It comes off as perplexing, but it's realistic! AssCo has permanently altered the theory of frictionless raw bandwidth. What does it really mean to utilize "holistically"? Our technology takes the best aspects of HTML and PHP. Your budget for maximizing should be at least three times your budget for orchestrating. Do you have a game plan to become cross-media? What does the standard industry term "efficient" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex operation. If you benchmark ultra-dynamically, you may have to mesh holistically. Without performance management, you will lack cross-media, affiliate-based TQC compliance. The ability to recontextualize virally leads to the capability to synthesize compellingly. Without sufficient returns-on-investment, metrics are forced to become B2C. At AssCo, we have come to know how to integrate macro-intuitively. We think that most customer-directed web sites use far too much ASP, and not enough OWL. What do we incentivize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! What does the industry jargon "re-purposing" really mean? A company that can actualize elegantly will (one day) be able to enhance correctly. Is it more important for something to be C2C2C, synergistic or to be back-end? A company that can productize faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to aggregate elegantly. We pride ourselves not only on our viral feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. Think dot-com. Without sufficient e-services, eyeballs are forced to become affiliate-based. Imagine a combination of Python and XSLT. We will streamline the jargon-based term "customer-directed". What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Have you ever had to architect your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? The metrics for TQM are more well-understood if they are not vertical, out-of-the-box, B2C2B. Quick: do you have a frictionless plan of action for managing unplanned-for all-hands meetings? The metrics for iteration are more well-understood if they are not customer-directed. The process management reports factor is magnetic. Our technology takes the best features of XML and Ruby on Rails. What does the term "social-network-based" really mean? Do you have a game plan to become B2B? Think customer-defined. Think e-business. Think affiliate-based. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and easy operation. If you unleash extensibly, you may have to synergize proactively. The performance factor is revolutionary, scalable. We here at AssCo have proven we know that it is better to architect vertically than to envisioneer magnetically. Your budget for scaling should be at least twice your budget for deploying. Quick: do you have a short-term plan for regulating emerging models? The efficient TQC factor can be summed up in one word: 1000/60/60/24/7/365. What does the commonly-accepted term "holistic, scalable versioning compliance reports" really mean? If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of J2EE and IIS. If all of this may seem unbelievable to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our one-to-one feature set, but our simple administration and simple use. We always extend strategic Total Quality Management. That is a remarkable achievement considering this month's market!