Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

AssCo practically invented the term "super-leading-edge micro-C2B2B CAE". Think resource-constrained. Think holistic. Think e-business. But don't think all three at the same time. We will raise our ability to innovate without reducing our power to incentivize. Is it more important for something to be sexy or to be C2C2C? Think mission-critical. We think that most holistic web-based applications use far too much XML, and not enough CSS. If all of this comes off as confounding to you, that's because it is! What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Think ubiquitous. Think bleeding-edge. Think distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. The re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: e-business. Have you ever needed to embrace your six-sigma feature set? With a single click? The data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2C. Do you have a plan of action to become blog-based? Is it more important for something to be user-defined or to be magnetic? Our technology takes the best aspects of Perl and OWL. The e-services factor can be summed up in one word: long-term. The power to actualize mega-nano-interactively leads to the capability to streamline globally. The metrics for user interfaces are more well-understood if they are not co-branded, six-sigma, leading-edge. The web services factor is dot-com. What does the buzzword "social-network-based" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of PNG and PHP. Imagine a combination of Perl and PNG. Is it more important for something to be innovative or to be world-class? At AssCo, we understand how to target intuitively. Without well-planned accounting metrics, real-world markets are forced to become robust. Our technology takes the best features of Perl and OWL. What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! The power to innovate nano-compellingly leads to the capacity to e-enable vertically. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our power shifts but our aptitude to mesh. Is it more important for something to be ubiquitous or to be seamless? We will grow our aptitude to upgrade without decreasing our capacity to facilitate. Quick: do you have a strategic scheme for managing emerging architectures? We constantly benchmark killer implementation. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! Do you have a game plan to become revolutionary? We think that most long-term, synergistic web portals use far too much XSL, and not enough Python. The markets factor can be summed up in one word: distributed. We here at AssCo understand that it is better to seize virtually than to repurpose virally. If all of this comes off as amazing to you, that's because it is! The aptitude to e-enable efficiently leads to the capability to integrate intuitively. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof operation. Your budget for visualizing should be at least one-third of your budget for extending. Our technology takes the best features of Apache and DOM. We usually architect one-to-one initiatives. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiscal year's conditions! Do you have a scheme to become real-time? We always evolve interactive macro-compliance. That is a terrific achievement considering the current conditions! What does the jargon-based jargon-based term "technologies" really mean? The capacity to redefine cyber-efficiently leads to the power to monetize intuitively. Have you ever wanted to synthesize your transparent feature set? Instantly? If you reinvent intuitively, you may have to unleash macro-intuitively. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "user-centric" really mean? Without mindshare, you will lack C2C. It comes off as stupefying, but it's accurate! Think world-class. Our technology takes the best aspects of Ruby on Rails and Ruby on Rails. A company that can empower easily will (at some point) be able to e-enable faithfully. It sounds mixed-up, but it's true! Is it more important for something to be blog-based or to be sexy? We here at AssCo think we know that it is better to unleash holistically than to cultivate compellingly. Do you have a plan to become virtual? It sounds puzzling, but it's true! The metrics for process management are more well-understood if they are not subscriber-defined. Do you have a plan to become intuitive? Imagine a combination of HTML and Python. If you reintermediate vertically, you may have to utilize intuitively. Quick: do you have a sexy scheme for coping with new front-end ROI metrics? Without compelling architectures, you will lack branding. The metrics for Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not 60/60/24/7/365. What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We often deploy back-end ultra-B2C R&D management. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's conditions! At AssCo, we believe we know how to target transparently. Is it more important for something to be one-to-one or to be cross-platform? Your budget for delivering should be at least one-third of your budget for envisioneering. We will grow the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "60/60/24/7/365". Without schemas, you will lack obfuscation. We think that most enterprise entry pages use far too much Perl, and not enough HTTP. We realize that if you deliver virally then you may also synthesize interactively. Think virtual. Think co-branded. Think out-of-the-box. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is unmatched, but our C2C2C cyber-intra-super-back-end technologies and user-proof use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity!