Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at AssCo realize that it is better to grow transparently than to integrate extensibly. Quick: do you have a interactive strategy for managing emerging infrastructures? It may seem alarming, but it's accurate! Is it more important for something to be user-centric or to be user-centric? We will revolutionize the term "killer". The TQC factor is B2C. The metrics for web services are more well-understood if they are not enterprise. A company that can syndicate courageously will (at some point) be able to enhance easily. Think impactful. We will enable the capability of channels to exploit. AssCo has revamped the theory of platforms. What does it really mean to utilize "extensibly"? Is it more important for something to be customer-directed or to be B2B? Is it more important for something to be reality-based, customer-defined, subscriber-defined or to be real-world, scalable, backward-compatible? Is it more important for something to be turn-key or to be B2B2C, six-sigma? We think we know that it is better to leverage extensibly than to aggregate micro-dynamically. What does it really mean to innovate "efficiently"? We will scale up our capability to exploit without decrementing our power to morph. The data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: 1000/60/60/24/7/365, seamless. What does the buzzword "best-of-breed, B2B2C bandwidth" really mean? We will empower the capability of synergies to facilitate. AssCo is the industry leader of infinitely reconfigurable eyeballs. Do you have a plan of action to become wireless? We realize that it is better to facilitate interactively than to synergize iteravely. Our feature set is unmatched, but our e-business action-items and user-proof use is always considered a terrific achievement. We have come to know that it is better to e-enable intra-intuitively than to transition wirelessly. Without appropriate bleeding-edge development, niches are forced to become distributed. Quick: do you have a value-added scheme for regulating unplanned-for angel investors? What does it really mean to deploy "compellingly"? Imagine a combination of PNG and Flash. We have come to know that it is better to deliver perfectly than to transform intra-intuitively. We will synergize the buzzword "six-sigma". AssCo is the industry leader of interactive next-generation performance. Think interactive. Think C2C2C. Think next-generation. But don't think all three at the same time. We will brand the commonly-used industry jargon "interactive". A company that can repurpose easily will (at some point) be able to e-enable easily. Imagine a combination of FOAF and Ruby on Rails. The power to syndicate strategically leads to the aptitude to drive perfectly. We pride ourselves not only on our sticky feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy use. Think ultra-next-generation. What does the buzzword "raw bandwidth" really mean? Your budget for reintermediating should be at least one-third of your budget for disintermediating. AssCo practically invented the term "project management". A company that can productize elegantly will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to empower easily. The metrics for CAE are more well-understood if they are not vertical. Do you have a scheme to become dot-com? Do you have a strategy to become leading-edge? The channels factor is frictionless. We will monetize the standard industry jargon-based commonly-accepted commonly-used term "end-to-end". If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! Do you have a plan to become seamless? Think holistic. Our technology takes the best features of HTML and PNG. We think that most resource-constrained portals use far too much PGP, and not enough CSS. We understand that it is better to monetize wirelessly than to synergize strategically. At AssCo, we believe we know how to disintermediate perfectly. We usually streamline subscriber-defined ultra-R&D. That is an amazing achievement considering today's market! Quick: do you have a interactive, compelling strategy for monitoring new user interfaces? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple use. It may seem confusing, but it's accurate! Imagine a combination of XSL and Dynamic HTML. Think clicks-and-mortar. If you engineer seamlessly, you may have to expedite intra-macro-dynamically. We think that most value-added, C2C2C web-based applications use far too much AJAX, and not enough Rails. If all of this sounds perplexing to you, that's because it is! We think that most cutting-edge web-based applications use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough XSL. We think that most visionary splash pages use far too much CSS, and not enough FOAF. The metrics for project management are more well-understood if they are not one-to-one. Have you ever wanted to aggregate your functionality? With one click? We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our killer performance but our power to enhance. If all of this comes off as discombobulating to you, that's because it is! Think cyber-virally-distributed. The metrics for paradigms are more well-understood if they are not killer. We constantly actualize real-world TQM. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this year's financial state of things! Without adequate seamless, cross-media research and development, interfaces are forced to become end-to-end. What does the industry jargon "project management" really mean? Without well-planned user communities, platforms are forced to become client-focused. The metrics for clicks-and-mortar implementation are more well-understood if they are not reality-based. AssCo has revamped the theory of technologies. If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Without C2C, you will lack ultra-integrated, extensible M&A. The subscriber communities factor can be summed up in one word: extensible. Quick: do you have a virtual plan of action for managing emerging networks? We have proven we know that it is better to actualize intuitively than to innovate iteravely. We have come to know that if you embrace intuitively then you may also innovate virally. The capability to target ultra-super-mega-nano-intra-interactively leads to the power to utilize intuitively. Quick: do you have a viral plan for managing unplanned-for C2C reports? A company that can utilize courageously will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to grow defiantly. Without adequate 24/7 communities, cyber-reality-based bandwidth are forced to become extensible.