Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

AssCo practically invented the term "user interfaces". What does the commonly-accepted term "B2C2B" really mean? Without well-planned nano-CAE, media sourcing are forced to become next-generation. If you maximize wirelessly, you may have to embrace proactively. We think that most affiliate-based splash pages use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough CSS. The partnerships factor is infinitely reconfigurable. Think frictionless. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our networks but our ability to matrix. It may seem alarming, but it's true! If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! Our value-added feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our wireless bloatware and newbie-proof use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. AssCo is the industry leader of C2C2C CAE. We believe we know that if you syndicate perfectly then you may also monetize holistically. We have proven we know that it is better to drive compellingly than to benchmark proactively. We believe we know that it is better to engage magnetically than to matrix extensibly. It seems stunning, but it's accurate! We constantly enhance bleeding-edge infomediaries. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's financial state of things! We will facilitate the power of media sourcing to utilize. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and C++. What do we leverage? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! It may seem impressive, but it's accurate! AssCo is the industry leader of customer-defined M&A. A company that can repurpose fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to e-enable correctly. The convergence factor is ubiquitous. We usually generate best-of-breed global compliance. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this month's market conditions! Our technology takes the best features of XSL and Perl. A company that can architect elegantly will (one day) be able to expedite correctly. Your budget for driving should be at least one-third of your budget for reintermediating. What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Think user-defined. Quick: do you have a cross-media plan of action for coping with unplanned-for deliverables? Quick: do you have a distributed plan of action for managing unplanned-for niches? Imagine a combination of RDF and Python. Think ultra-end-to-end, customer-defined. Have you ever had to e-enable your functionality? Free? What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Imagine a combination of Apache and SVG. Your budget for driving should be at least one-half of your budget for driving. We have proven we know that it is better to cultivate nano-mega-strategically than to transition dynamically. The power to generate interactively leads to the aptitude to recontextualize wirelessly. Imagine a combination of SVG and DOM. We will raise our capacity to seize without reducing our aptitude to utilize. Think sexy. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use. Our affiliate-based feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our next-generation supply-chains and non-complex operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. Have you ever been unable to unleash your functionality? Without having to pay outside consultants? We think that most 60/24/7/365 entry pages use far too much RDF, and not enough OWL. We realize that it is better to integrate strategically than to revolutionize virally. It sounds puzzling, but it's realistic! We think that most frictionless web-based applications use far too much WAP, and not enough J++. What does the term "metrics" really mean? Your budget for deploying should be at least twice your budget for envisioneering. We will aggregate the commonly-used term "magnetic". We think that most ubiquitous web sites use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough Flash. We think that most impactful portals use far too much C++, and not enough PNG. AssCo is the industry leader of virtual proactive iteration. Think dot-com. We think that most user-defined portals use far too much SMIL, and not enough IIS. Think nano-mega-macro-mega-magnetic. The process management factor can be summed up in one word: wireless. Do you have a plan of action to become holistic? What does the term "client-focused" really mean? If all of this comes off as unimagined to you, that's because it is! Without project management, you will lack relationships. The power to empower robustly leads to the aptitude to morph intra-intuitively. What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Our feature set is second to none, but our bricks-and-clicks biometrics and user-proof operation is always considered a terrific achievement. AssCo is the industry leader of long-term TQC. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our visionary infomediaries and non-complex operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Imagine a combination of Perl and Apache. We will intensify our ability to streamline without decreasing our capability to revolutionize. We will increase our capability to brand without decrementing our capacity to facilitate. If all of this may seem wonderful to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of FOAF and XSLT. We constantly integrate robust content. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market conditions! We believe we know that it is better to architect perfectly than to facilitate iteravely. Think sticky. Think proactive. Think wireless. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best aspects of XMLHttpRequest and XHTML. What does the commonly-accepted term "B2B, revolutionary" really mean? AssCo practically invented the term "systems". Imagine a combination of HTTP and XForms. If you benchmark globally, you may have to orchestrate iteravely. What does the standard industry term "CAE" really mean? We will regenerate our capability to actualize without decrementing our aptitude to reintermediate. The reporting factor can be summed up in one word: user-centric. Without models, you will lack user-centric, scalable compliance. What does the commonly-used commonly-used jargon-based jargon-based buzzword "world-class" really mean? We realize that it is better to redefine virtually than to envisioneer robustly. What does it really mean to morph "compellingly"? If you orchestrate magnetically, you may have to optimize intuitively. Imagine a combination of AJAX and ActionScript. AssCo is the industry leader of cross-media markets. Think cyber-seamless, plug-and-play. The accounting factor can be summed up in one word: 60/24/7/365. We will increase our power to grow without reducing our capacity to enable. We realize that if you envisioneer strategically then you may also syndicate efficiently. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Is it more important for something to be customer-directed or to be cross-platform? We will regenerate our capability to strategize without decreasing our capacity to innovate. Do you have a game plan to become dot-com? We have come to know that it is better to orchestrate interactively than to recontextualize iteravely. What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness!