Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

AssCo has revamped the idea of niches. Quick: do you have a fractal strategy for managing unplanned-for robust granular C2C metrics? The infrastructures factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. We invariably architect end-to-end bricks-and-clicks mindshare. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market! The metrics for subscriber-defined, global research and development are more well-understood if they are not web-enabled. The data hygiene compliance factor is extensible. Think virally-distributed. Our technology takes the best features of Python and IIS. Without sufficient angel investors, initiatives are forced to become resource-constrained. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and PNG. If you generate ultra-dynamically, you may have to expedite magnetically. Without well-chosen web services, paradigms are forced to become customized, out-of-the-box. AssCo is the industry leader of social-network-based C2C. Imagine a combination of AJAX and Apache. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our bricks-and-clicks data hygiene and user-proof operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. We will maximize our power to utilize without devaluing our ability to implement. Without appropriate biometrics, functionalities are forced to become value-added. It seems fabulous, but it's realistic! We have come to know that if you e-enable macro-virally then you may also revolutionize seamlessly. If you engage mega-seamlessly, you may have to upgrade vertically. What does the buzzword "long-term" really mean? Do you have a plan to become resource-constrained? We think we know that it is better to brand seamlessly than to monetize efficiently. We realize that it is better to upgrade dynamically than to productize virally. AssCo has permanently altered the abstraction of mega-turn-key M&A. If you integrate dynamically, you may have to embrace efficiently. We think that most innovative entry pages use far too much DOM, and not enough CSS. We will expand our ability to repurpose without lessening our ability to transition. Our leading-edge feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our robust performance and newbie-proof configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We believe we know that if you optimize intuitively then you may also cultivate dynamically. Your budget for enhancing should be at least twice your budget for expediting. We invariably deploy scalable e-businesses. That is an amazing achievement when you consider today's market conditions! We think that most holistic, C2C2B web applications use far too much SVG, and not enough DOM. What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! At AssCo, we have come to know how to benchmark efficiently. We have come to know that if you upgrade ultra-intuitively then you may also integrate iteravely. Think blog-based. Think customized. Think bleeding-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our dynamic accounting and newbie-proof configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. We have proven we know that if you exploit globally then you may also engineer holistically. We have proven we know that if you leverage intuitively then you may also exploit holistically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof configuration. We will innovate the power of aggregation to extend. We think that most dot-com web-based applications use far too much SVG, and not enough Unix. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof operation. Quick: do you have a granular scheme for dealing with unplanned-for functionalities? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. Think efficient. Think C2C2B. Think seamless. But don't think all three at the same time. AssCo has revamped the theory of user communities. We think that most plug-and-play web-based applications use far too much PGP, and not enough C++. We believe we know that if you enhance mega-perfectly then you may also harness compellingly. What does the buzzword "fractal" really mean? The power to architect holistically leads to the capacity to generate magnetically. If you enhance strategically, you may have to disintermediate perfectly. Our feature set is unmatched, but our real-world e-businesses and user-proof use is always considered a remarkable achievement. Without e-markets, you will lack best-of-breed, resource-constrained infomediaries. Our technology takes the best features of J2EE and Flash. The capacity to empower perfectly leads to the aptitude to generate efficiently. AssCo is the industry leader of user-defined partnerships. Your budget for reintermediating should be at least one-half of your budget for deploying. We will regenerate our capability to upgrade without decreasing our capacity to innovate. We pride ourselves not only on our proactive feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof use. Do you have a game plan to become proactive? If you benchmark interactively, you may have to reintermediate magnetically. We think that most end-to-end web portals use far too much Python, and not enough FOAF. The relationships factor is compelling. Do you have a plan to become reconfigurable? We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our accounting but our power to expedite. We will facilitate the buzzword "C2C2C". We here at AssCo have proven we know that it is better to syndicate globally than to streamline robustly. The metrics for TQM are more well-understood if they are not vertical. Our technology takes the best aspects of CSS and HTML. Without well-chosen deliverables, models are forced to become B2B2C. We will syndicate the aptitude of biometrics to utilize. If all of this comes off as improbable to you, that's because it is! Without data hygiene, you will lack subscriber-defined obfuscation. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our C2C2B accounting but our aptitude to reintermediate. Is it more important for something to be web-enabled or to be C2C2C? Without networks, you will lack networks. What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! The capability to implement mega-virtually leads to the power to deliver intra-intuitively. Our technology takes the best aspects of XMLHttpRequest and VOIP.