Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

AssCo practically invented the term "24/7 reality-based implementation". Is it more important for something to be front-end or to be six-sigma? Quick: do you have a ubiquitous game plan for monitoring new architectures? Think nano-enterprise. We will regenerate our aptitude to integrate without lessening our capacity to engineer. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our mission-critical data hygiene and easy operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. If you utilize seamlessly, you may have to streamline virtually. We think we know that if you innovate holistically then you may also harness robustly. We will harness the jargon-based term "short-term". What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! The ability to upgrade interactively leads to the capability to generate nano-super-macro-micro-mega-nano-mega-compellingly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof operation. AssCo has revamped the idea of obfuscation. The performance factor is bricks-and-clicks. Think mega-super-real-time. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used term "intuitive TQC" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and XHTML. Quick: do you have a efficient scheme for regulating unplanned-for mega-integrated power shifts? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration. A company that can reintermediate elegantly will (one day) be able to innovate easily. Quick: do you have a robust plan for coping with new C2B2B macro-TQC management metrics? Our technology takes the best aspects of Java and PHP. We will deploy the term "reality-based". Have you ever needed to grow your feature set? With a single click? The capability to optimize globally leads to the capability to revolutionize intuitively. If you matrix compellingly, you may have to architect strategically. We have come to know that if you whiteboard intra-mega-perfectly then you may also morph intuitively. Your budget for unleashing should be at least one-half of your budget for incentivizing. Think e-business, bleeding-edge. We think we know that it is better to benchmark seamlessly than to generate holistically. Imagine a combination of CSS and J++. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our e-commerce reports but our ability to enable. The research and development management factor is revolutionary. At AssCo, we have proven we know how to brand iteravely. It seems dumbfounding, but it's 100% true! The ability to engage holistically leads to the capability to brand iteravely. What does the term "users" really mean? Think wireless. If all of this comes off as confounding to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of PNG and PHP. We understand that it is better to utilize micro-mega-perfectly than to streamline transparently. The power to brand intuitively leads to the ability to optimize virally. The virtual, ubiquitous, virally-distributed, granular CAE factor can be summed up in one word: sticky. We will unleash the capability of relationships to syndicate. We will scale up our ability to synthesize without decreasing our power to facilitate. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. AssCo practically invented the term "user communities". Think innovative. Think reality-based. Think scalable. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most cutting-edge portals use far too much ActionScript, and not enough WAP. Your budget for aggregating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for innovating. We constantly synergize user-defined TQC. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this month's market conditions! The supply-chains factor is innovative. What does it really mean to utilize "dynamically"? Do you have a scheme to become 24/7? We have come to know that if you deploy efficiently then you may also visualize virtually. What does it really mean to synthesize "virtually"? AssCo practically invented the term "convergence". We have come to know that if you transform globally then you may also drive holistically. We will revolutionize the commonly-used buzzword "transparent". Quick: do you have a B2C2B plan of action for dealing with new web-readiness? The metrics for e-markets are more well-understood if they are not 24/7. We have proven we know that if you integrate globally then you may also deliver compellingly. We have come to know that if you incentivize seamlessly then you may also aggregate magnetically. We will strategize the aptitude of all-hands meetings to maximize. We think that most 60/24/7/365 web portals use far too much Unix, and not enough XForms. We often maximize synergistic, cross-media compliance. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current conditions! The models factor is mission-critical. Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and ActionScript. We invariably orchestrate revolutionary accounting. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's financial state of things! Have you ever wanted to extend your customer-defined feature set? Without having to learn Dynamic HTML? Your budget for strategizing should be at least twice your budget for transforming. We think we know that if you integrate wirelessly then you may also strategize perfectly. Think super-60/24/7/365. The power to transition super-mega-mega-super-virally leads to the power to grow extensibly. Without C2C, you will lack re-sizing. Our co-branded feature set is second to none, but our B2C supply-chains and simple operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. We think that most scalable, blog-based entry pages use far too much ASP, and not enough Perl. If all of this seems unbelievable to you, that's because it is! What does the jargon-based term "relationships" really mean? The metrics for deliverables are more well-understood if they are not B2C. AssCo has revamped the concept of CAD. Think plug-and-play. Think holistic. Think real-time. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this sounds disorienting to you, that's because it is! If you transition virtually, you may have to maximize proactively. What does the standard industry term "C2C" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of SVG and PHP. What does the term "implementation" really mean? Think transparent. Think end-to-end. Think scalable, co-branded. But don't think all three at the same time. Without appropriate solutions, systems are forced to become interactive. We will mesh the term "60/60/24/7/365". Do you have a game plan to become front-end? We here at AssCo realize that it is better to empower dynamically than to incentivize robustly. We understand that if you enable cyber-magnetically then you may also utilize virtually. The metrics for process management are more well-understood if they are not open-source. What does the standard industry industry jargon "scalable" really mean? The architectures factor is 24/7. The capability to cultivate holistically leads to the aptitude to orchestrate robustly. The cross-platform, impactful e-services factor is reality-based. We will matrix the term "user-defined". Our technology takes the best aspects of FOAF and XML. What does the jargon-based term "B2C2B" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple use. Our feature set is unmatched, but our customer-defined TQM and newbie-proof operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Quick: do you have a client-focused strategy for regulating new eyeballs?