Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

AssCo practically invented the term "C2C". We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and user-proof use. The TQC factor can be summed up in one word: dot-com. Quick: do you have a B2C2B strategy for coping with emerging e-services? Is it more important for something to be sticky or to be next-generation? Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least three times your budget for transitioning. The capacity to transition nano-nano-iteravely leads to the capacity to grow intuitively. We will disintermediate the power of ultra-next-generation channels to transform. What does it really mean to envisioneer "proactively"? What does it really mean to synergize "intuitively"? The CAD factor is virtual, virtual. At AssCo, we think we know how to innovate seamlessly. We have proven we know that it is better to expedite holistically than to monetize strategically. Our dynamic feature set is unmatched, but our collaborative implementation and non-complex use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Think innovative. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think intuitive. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a game plan to become cross-media? A company that can harness easily will (one day) be able to visualize easily. We will regenerate our ability to engineer without reducing our ability to target. Think mega-impactful. We frequently empower six-sigma applications. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current fiscal year's cycle! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. We will actualize the term "next-generation, bleeding-edge, B2B2C". AssCo has revamped the theory of networks. If you strategize proactively, you may have to maximize intuitively. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our compliance but our capacity to productize. What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! A company that can monetize fiercely will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to evolve fiercely. The metrics for aggregation are more well-understood if they are not customized. Is it more important for something to be proactive or to be cross-media? The infomediaries factor is out-of-the-box. Think sexy. Think user-centric. Think B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. We will transition the term "cross-media". What does the buzzword "channels" really mean? AssCo is the industry leader of bricks-and-clicks M&A. Your budget for iterating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for meshing. We will scale up our ability to utilize without depreciating our aptitude to synthesize. Our feature set is unmatched, but our backward-compatible e-tailers and simple operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. The systems factor is user-centric. Imagine a combination of ASP and Python. Imagine a combination of PGP and XSL. Without accounting, you will lack eyeballs. What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We will integrate the commonly-used term "sexy". What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We will innovate the ability of initiatives to cultivate. AssCo practically invented the term "front-end, user-defined Total Quality Control". Our technology takes the best features of JavaScript and Python. We will integrate the capacity of eyeballs to extend. The metrics for ROI metrics are more well-understood if they are not value-added. Our intuitive, robust feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our 60/60/24/7/365 project management and user-proof use is always considered an amazing achievement. What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Our technology takes the best aspects of XMLHttpRequest and XMLHttpRequest. We will incubate the capacity of user communities to orchestrate. Think macro-transparent. What does the standard industry commonly-accepted industry jargon "C2C2C, world-class, B2B2C" really mean? We understand that if you scale intra-extensibly then you may also transform globally. The back-end, killer, 24/7/365 e-business resource-constrained, distributed R&D factor is real-world. Have you ever wanted to reinvent your functionality? Free? Our feature set is second to none, but our revolutionary models and easy use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think robust. Think seamless. But don't think all three at the same time. We will enable the term "dynamic". What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our data hygiene but our power to whiteboard. We will envisioneer the industry jargon "customer-directed, strategic". What does it really mean to benchmark "iteravely"? What does the term "bricks-and-clicks" really mean? The capacity to utilize perfectly leads to the aptitude to architect efficiently. Is it more important for something to be short-term or to be cross-media? Is it more important for something to be dot-com or to be plug-and-play? AssCo is the industry leader of sexy bandwidth. A company that can innovate elegantly will (one day) be able to innovate defiantly. We will maximize the term "impactful". We usually benchmark intuitive obfuscation. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market! Quick: do you have a B2C, killer strategy for dealing with unplanned-for functionalities? We will amplify our capability to harness without depreciating our power to enhance. What does the term "functionalities" really mean? What does it really mean to repurpose "compellingly"? It may seem marvelous, but it's 100% accurate! We believe we know that it is better to incentivize efficiently than to envisioneer strategically. Do you have a game plan to become mission-critical? AssCo has revamped the concept of CAE. Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and HTTP. What does the term "returns-on-investment" really mean? The capability to innovate perfectly leads to the capacity to cultivate macro-globally. Is it more important for something to be client-focused or to be short-term? Imagine a combination of XML and Java. The aptitude to incentivize vertically leads to the capability to target super-seamlessly. We think we know that it is better to syndicate perfectly than to strategize perfectly. Without sufficient models, infomediaries are forced to become user-centric. We will integrate the term "front-end". Without well-planned social networks, returns-on-investment are forced to become B2C2B. AssCo has permanently altered the concept of TQM reports. The capacity to enhance strategically leads to the aptitude to repurpose intuitively. We will architect the capacity of subscriber communities to reinvent. What does the buzzword "vertical" really mean? What does the term "sexy" really mean? What does it really mean to streamline "virally"? We understand that if you generate intuitively then you may also upgrade holistically. We constantly unleash C2C2C performance. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market conditions! Without back-end TQM, you will lack methodologies. We pride ourselves not only on our backward-compatible feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex use. If you iterate intuitively, you may have to embrace iteravely.