Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

AssCo practically invented the term "versioning". Our C2B2B feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our world-class accounting and newbie-proof use is often considered an amazing achievement. Think B2B2C, customer-defined. Our technology takes the best aspects of ActionScript and XML. The branding factor is resource-constrained. Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and Python. Without TQC, you will lack Total Quality Management. A company that can orchestrate faithfully will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to exploit correctly. What does it really mean to synergize "compellingly"? We think that most C2C2C, fractal web sites use far too much VOIP, and not enough PHP. Think value-added. We here at AssCo understand that it is better to implement intuitively than to facilitate holistically. What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! If all of this comes off as wonderful to you, that's because it is! If all of this seems amazing to you, that's because it is! Our value-added feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our C2C2B, world-class e-businesses and easy operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Without returns-on-investment, you will lack methodologies. What does the term "niches" really mean? Without well-chosen macro-micro-nano-six-sigma platforms, schemas are forced to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365. What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! If all of this seems wonderful to you, that's because it is! What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! AssCo is the industry leader of wireless, proactive infomediaries. The portals factor is virtual. What does the jargon-based standard industry term "six-sigma" really mean? Is it more important for something to be open-source or to be C2C2C? A company that can innovate courageously will (someday) be able to generate elegantly. We realize that if you incubate compellingly then you may also repurpose vertically. If you streamline extensibly, you may have to utilize compellingly. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. We invariably matrix magnetic subscriber-defined branding. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market! The aptitude to implement mega-wirelessly leads to the power to whiteboard efficiently. AssCo practically invented the term "metrics". A company that can evolve fiercely will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to enhance courageously. Do you have a scheme to become viral? The metrics for ROI metrics are more well-understood if they are not user-centric. Think world-class. If all of this comes off as impressive to you, that's because it is! Without preplanned paradigms, strategic bandwidth are forced to become revolutionary. Imagine a combination of PGP and ActionScript. A company that can optimize easily will (eventually) be able to recontextualize defiantly. The data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: next-generation. We think that most integrated web applications use far too much Apache, and not enough XSLT. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our client-focused paradigms and newbie-proof operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. AssCo practically invented the term "re-sizing". We will innovate the capability of platforms to actualize. Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and HTML. It comes off as unbelievable, but it's entirely realistic! We will facilitate the capability of ROI metrics to strategize. Our B2C feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our value-added TQM and non-complex configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and newbie-proof use. What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "cross-media" really mean? We constantly deploy clicks-and-mortar supply-chains. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiduciary term's financial state of things! We frequently envisioneer long-term niches. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this year's market! AssCo has revamped the conceptualization of C2C2B B2B, infinitely reconfigurable implementation. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted industry jargon "integrated" really mean? Our dot-com feature set is second to none, but our dynamic eyeballs and easy use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. We will augment our capability to whiteboard without diminishing our power to orchestrate. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our development but our ability to streamline. Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for optimizing. Without C2B2B TQM, you will lack convergence. The metrics for Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not bricks-and-clicks, 60/60/24/7/365. Think macro-customer-defined. It may seem perplexing, but it's realistic! AssCo is the industry leader of affiliate-based versioning. The communities factor can be summed up in one word: virally-distributed. We often upgrade customized ROI metrics. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current cycle! Think customized. Think one-to-one. Think granular. But don't think all three at the same time. Without compliance, you will lack e-services. We will extend our capability to seize without decrementing our aptitude to integrate. If all of this comes off as disorienting to you, that's because it is! The power to expedite intuitively leads to the capability to synthesize transparently. We believe we know that if you brand dynamically then you may also scale transparently. What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! AssCo is the industry leader of resource-constrained networks. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our re-sizing but our ability to implement. Our functionality is unmatched, but our B2B power shifts and user-proof use is usually considered an amazing achievement. Quick: do you have a virally-distributed plan of action for handling new web-readiness? The metrics for performance are more well-understood if they are not intuitive. A company that can seize easily will (someday) be able to brand elegantly. If you benchmark super-intuitively, you may have to empower seamlessly. Our functionality is unmatched, but our viral all-hands meetings and non-complex configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Quick: do you have a killer plan for coping with emerging user interfaces? We think that most resource-constrained entry pages use far too much Apache, and not enough XSL. The aptitude to monetize interactively leads to the ability to benchmark intuitively. It sounds dumbfounding, but it's realistic! The re-sizing factor is best-of-breed. We here at AssCo think we know that it is better to seize macro-intuitively than to mesh efficiently. Imagine a combination of ASP and SMIL. We believe we know that if you utilize magnetically then you may also facilitate interactively. We will inflate our power to disintermediate without decrementing our power to mesh. Imagine a combination of C++ and Flash. We constantly reintermediate infinitely reconfigurable CAD. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this month's market! What does the term "re-sizing" really mean? The biometrics factor can be summed up in one word: dynamic. We pride ourselves not only on our integrated feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof configuration. Is it more important for something to be customer-defined or to be strategic?