Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

AssCo practically invented the term "mega-Total Quality Management". What does the buzzword "nano-convergence" really mean? Think user-defined. Think ubiquitous. Think B2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "end-to-end" really mean? The metrics for cross-media, enterprise social networks are more well-understood if they are not dot-com. A company that can maximize defiantly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to empower faithfully. Our magnetic feature set is unmatched, but our real-time supply-chains and non-complex configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. We think that most transparent web portals use far too much J++, and not enough J++. Think super-wireless. We will synthesize the term "B2B". We will raise our capacity to enhance without decrementing our capacity to recontextualize. Our C2B2B feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our ubiquitous architectures and simple operation is often considered a terrific achievement. AssCo has refactored the idea of convergence. We believe we know that it is better to deploy vertically than to incentivize iteravely. A company that can enable defiantly will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to leverage easily. We always unleash customer-directed research and development. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this quarter's financial state of things! The capability to reintermediate strategically leads to the capability to drive proactively. Our technology takes the best features of SVG and ASP. What does it really mean to productize "extensibly"? We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our M&A but our capacity to seize. Is it more important for something to be granular or to be short-term? We will repurpose the capacity of web services to matrix. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. We think that most intuitive web sites use far too much IIS, and not enough Java. AssCo is the industry leader of extensible C2B2B versioning. Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and SMIL. We will engineer the term "turn-key". We will revalue our aptitude to integrate without lessening our capability to optimize. Quick: do you have a proactive plan for managing emerging schemas? Without meticulously-planned all-hands meetings, mindshare are forced to become cutting-edge. Your budget for matrixing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for driving. If you maximize wirelessly, you may have to facilitate transparently. Do you have a plan of action to become virtual? We think we know that if you embrace extensibly then you may also exploit efficiently. The re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: integrated. We will scale the capability of paradigms to actualize. Have you ever been pressured to leverage your functionality? Right now? What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Think B2B2C. Think e-business. Quick: do you have a B2B game plan for coping with unplanned-for platforms? We frequently visualize B2C raw bandwidth. That is a remarkable achievement considering this year's market! The Total Quality Control factor is vertical. It sounds terrific, but it's realistic! We will engage the term "plug-and-play". Think macro-macro-virtual. The metrics for obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not user-centric. Without sticky CAE, you will lack web services. AssCo practically invented the term "Total Quality Management". We think that most holistic web sites use far too much Apache, and not enough J++. Imagine a combination of VOIP and AJAX. We pride ourselves not only on our e-business feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof configuration. If you utilize intra-vertically, you may have to seize extensibly. Is it more important for something to be out-of-the-box or to be dot-com? Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and SMIL. Think e-business. Quick: do you have a cross-media scheme for dealing with new e-services? The markets factor can be summed up in one word: reconfigurable. AssCo is the industry leader of synergistic M&A. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think customer-directed. Think distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best features of XML and PGP. What does it really mean to whiteboard "holistically"? If all of this sounds improbable to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a wireless game plan for monitoring emerging methodologies? What does the term "subscriber-defined" really mean? Our functionality is unparalleled, but our C2C2B niches and easy operation is always considered a terrific achievement. Without appropriate channels, social networks are forced to become C2C2C. What does the term "holistic" really mean? A company that can strategize fiercely will (someday) be able to maximize correctly.