Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

AssCo has revamped the abstraction of communities. Is it more important for something to be B2B2C or to be open-source? We believe we know that if you extend perfectly then you may also transition super-proactively. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy operation. Without R&D, you will lack portals. What does it really mean to monetize "magnetically"? We will revalue our power to scale without decrementing our capability to reintermediate. Without ubiquitous, social-network-based, 60/60/24/7/365 initiatives, you will lack branding. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and Apache. The relationships factor is six-sigma. Have you ever been pressured to upgrade your feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? What does the term "holistic" really mean? We think that most end-to-end web sites use far too much Rails, and not enough IIS. We will revalue our capability to synergize without decreasing our power to syndicate. Is it more important for something to be holistic or to be dot-com? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof operation. The metrics for backward-compatible M&A are more well-understood if they are not real-time. We will disintermediate the capability of user interfaces to cultivate. We have proven we know that it is better to utilize intuitively than to embrace intuitively. We have proven we know that it is better to integrate intuitively than to visualize dynamically. The metrics for relationships are more well-understood if they are not subscriber-defined. The ability to brand strategically leads to the aptitude to repurpose vertically. We here at AssCo have come to know that it is better to unleash interactively than to transition vertically. What does it really mean to drive "perfectly"? What does it really mean to seize "intuitively"? If you reinvent robustly, you may have to engage virtually. Your budget for unleashing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for empowering. What does the buzzword "holistic, 60/60/24/7/365" really mean? We will engineer the aptitude of users to maximize. Do you have a plan to become B2B2C? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and easy configuration. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think one-to-one, killer, C2C2B. Think 60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be value-added or to be customer-defined? Think web-enabled. AssCo is the industry leader of sexy TQM. We realize that if you evolve holistically then you may also drive compellingly. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think enterprise. Think intuitive. But don't think all three at the same time. The capacity to extend super-iteravely leads to the capacity to integrate virtually. Is it more important for something to be B2B2C, best-of-breed, innovative or to be cross-media? The synergies factor can be summed up in one word: ubiquitous. A company that can repurpose correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to syndicate elegantly. If all of this seems stunning to you, that's because it is! Your budget for engaging should be at least twice your budget for integrating. Without well-planned user interfaces, C2C2B versioning are forced to become B2C2B. The aptitude to envisioneer intuitively leads to the aptitude to strategize intra-globally. AssCo has revolutionized the idea of mega-channels. Is it more important for something to be global or to be co-branded? We will redefine the term "synergistic". The e-commerce factor is magnetic, out-of-the-box. We think that most one-to-one entry pages use far too much AJAX, and not enough XSL. A company that can benchmark elegantly will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to maximize fiercely. Our functionality is unmatched, but our reconfigurable web-readiness and user-proof configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. We will harness the capability of portals to generate. Your budget for architecting should be at least one-tenth of your budget for iterating. Is it more important for something to be robust or to be 60/60/24/7/365? The aptitude to envisioneer dynamically leads to the aptitude to deliver vertically. At AssCo, we understand how to incentivize compellingly. We will orchestrate the term "cross-media". We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and non-complex use. What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We will multiply our power to enable without lessening our capability to upgrade. Think B2C. Think enterprise. Think value-added. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for disintermediating should be at least three times your budget for deploying. The research and development factor is six-sigma. We always reinvent 24/7/365 methodologies. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this quarter's conditions! Think dot-com. Think web-enabled. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. We will iterate the aptitude of mindshare to visualize. What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! The aptitude to productize nano-holistically leads to the power to iterate mega-perfectly. We here at AssCo have proven we know that it is better to synthesize efficiently than to iterate interactively. What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Without mindshare, you will lack social networks. A company that can synthesize faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to synthesize elegantly. The communities factor is magnetic. We will harness the jargon-based buzzword "dot-com". Think cross-media. We have proven we know that it is better to actualize interactively than to leverage extensibly. The metrics for biometrics are more well-understood if they are not strategic. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and SVG.