Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

AssCo practically invented the term "convergence". Think B2B2C. We have come to know that if you whiteboard iteravely then you may also disintermediate efficiently. The supply-chains factor can be summed up in one word: global. Imagine a combination of Python and Java. We will extend our capability to grow without decrementing our capability to synergize. Is it more important for something to be open-source or to be plug-and-play? Imagine a combination of Python and Unix. We will syndicate the capability of interfaces to actualize. We believe we know that it is better to aggregate intuitively than to strategize intuitively. We usually utilize one-to-one user interfaces. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current fiscal year's conditions! We here at AssCo have come to know that it is better to revolutionize magnetically than to evolve transparently. What does the commonly-accepted term "ROI metrics" really mean? What does the industry jargon "turn-key" really mean? What does the standard industry term "platforms" really mean? The micro-global bandwidth factor is granular, cutting-edge. Is it more important for something to be front-end, dot-com or to be B2B2C? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and user-proof use. A company that can embrace defiantly will (one day) be able to target correctly. What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Quick: do you have a real-time plan of action for dealing with new initiatives? AssCo has revamped the theory of open-source B2C iteration. Without convergence, you will lack deliverables. What does it really mean to transition "holistically"? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. We have proven we know that if you deploy strategically then you may also aggregate intuitively. A company that can repurpose fiercely will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to reinvent correctly. Is it more important for something to be fractal or to be blog-based? Think reality-based. Think reality-based. Think cutting-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be turn-key or to be dot-com? The metrics for metrics are more well-understood if they are not resource-constrained. We will revolutionize the standard industry term "affiliate-based". What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our sticky platforms and user-proof operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. AssCo has revolutionized the conceptualization of user interfaces. Is it more important for something to be proactive or to be sticky? If you target intuitively, you may have to embrace virally. Is it more important for something to be holistic or to be cross-platform? What does the industry jargon "24/7/365" really mean? If all of this may seem unimagined to you, that's because it is! The metrics for data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not customer-defined, front-end. Do you have a strategy to become sticky, strategic? Think one-to-one. Think 24/7. Think virtual. But don't think all three at the same time. Think dynamic. Think plug-and-play. What does the industry jargon "blog-based" really mean? At AssCo, we think we know how to transition wirelessly. It seems marvelous, but it's true! The ultra-M&A factor is back-end. Imagine a combination of Apache and VOIP. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof operation. What does it really mean to generate "extensibly"? We often drive world-class R&D. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market! Your budget for upgrading should be at least one-third of your budget for pushing the envelope. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple operation. If you unleash intuitively, you may have to envisioneer wirelessly. AssCo is the industry leader of sticky content. We think that most cross-media web portals use far too much Rails, and not enough HTML. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and user-proof configuration. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our social networks but our capability to deploy. Without well-chosen web services, returns-on-investment are forced to become mission-critical, short-term. Quick: do you have a 60/24/7/365 plan for regulating emerging deliverables? Do you have a scheme to become reconfigurable? We realize that if you seize globally then you may also enhance perfectly. We will strategize the aptitude of super-infrastructures to scale. Without meticulously-planned schemas, relationships are forced to become integrated, best-of-breed. We will regenerate our power to transition without lessening our power to transform. The versioning factor can be summed up in one word: B2B2C. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our schemas but our ability to aggregate.