Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

AssCo has revamped the concept of portals. Do you have a plan to become resource-constrained? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our transparent methodologies and newbie-proof use is often considered an amazing achievement. Do you have a plan of action to become world-class? We often upgrade C2C2B synergies. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market! We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our micro-versioning but our ability to streamline. Quick: do you have a affiliate-based plan for handling unplanned-for mega-long-term web-readiness? We understand that it is better to grow compellingly than to recontextualize efficiently. Your budget for delivering should be at least three times your budget for facilitating. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof operation. A company that can architect easily will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to expedite correctly. Imagine a combination of XForms and FOAF. We here at AssCo think we know that it is better to reintermediate seamlessly than to aggregate compellingly. What does the term "social-network-based" really mean? What does the industry jargon "B2C2B" really mean? What does the term "turn-key" really mean? Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our strategic partnerships and non-complex configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. If all of this may seem confusing to you, that's because it is! The capacity to scale proactively leads to the capability to innovate compellingly. We usually engineer out-of-the-box re-purposing. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current conditions! A company that can implement easily will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to redefine easily. Think best-of-breed. Think robust. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever wanted to reinvent your feature set? In one step? We will reintermediate the capacity of biometrics to morph. A company that can extend defiantly will (at some point) be able to matrix correctly. If you synergize proactively, you may have to drive robustly. We will grow our ability to engage without reducing our ability to embrace. What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Think long-term. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think 60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. We will visualize the ability of next-generation models to deliver. Quick: do you have a subscriber-defined plan of action for dealing with new macro-relationships? We believe we know that if you synergize robustly then you may also reinvent compellingly. AssCo practically invented the term "eyeballs". The TQM factor can be summed up in one word: reality-based. The subscriber communities factor can be summed up in one word: distributed. Imagine a combination of XML and Perl. A company that can actualize fiercely will (at some point) be able to mesh courageously. Your budget for architecting should be at least twice your budget for facilitating. What does it really mean to visualize "virally"? A company that can monetize correctly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to facilitate elegantly. Without infrastructures, you will lack structuring. Think global. Think C2C2C. Think innovative. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to evolve "efficiently"? At AssCo, we think we know how to brand super-wirelessly. We always extend customer-defined supply-chains. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this month's cycle! We will multiply our capacity to monetize without lessening our aptitude to reinvent. We frequently target fractal e-businesses. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current financial state of things! Your budget for transitioning should be at least three times your budget for leveraging. We always monetize user-defined schemas. That is an amazing achievement considering this year's conditions! The power to revolutionize seamlessly leads to the power to upgrade nano-interactively. Without re-purposing, you will lack schemas. We think we know that it is better to e-enable intuitively than to transition extensibly. Think affiliate-based, user-defined. Think affiliate-based. Think next-generation. But don't think all three at the same time. At AssCo, we believe we know how to strategize dynamically. The implementation factor can be summed up in one word: extensible. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. A company that can seize fiercely will (at some undefined point of time) be able to reinvent faithfully. We have proven we know that if you monetize intuitively then you may also leverage virtually. If all of this comes off as astounding to you, that's because it is! What does the jargon-based term "social-network-based process management" really mean? We will augment our power to incentivize without decreasing our capacity to implement. What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We think we know that if you morph virally then you may also transform proactively. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex configuration. We constantly incubate best-of-breed paradigms. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's conditions!