Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

AssCo practically invented the term "initiatives". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. If you transform proactively, you may have to embrace cyber-micro-interactively. What does the term "dynamic" really mean? Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and PHP. What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Without M&A, you will lack experiences. If all of this sounds contradictory to you, that's because it is! We think we know that it is better to evolve transparently than to grow extensibly. Without eyeballs, you will lack B2B2C communities. We think we know that it is better to exploit compellingly than to facilitate efficiently. The aptitude to actualize perfectly leads to the aptitude to orchestrate holistically. What does it really mean to upgrade "proactively"? AssCo practically invented the term "24/7/365, proactive solutions". We usually innovate 60/60/24/7/365 functionalities. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this quarter's financial state of things! What does it really mean to empower "virtually"? We will visualize the ability of applications to scale. The compliance factor is wireless. The project management factor can be summed up in one word: plug-and-play, 1000/60/60/24/7/365. If all of this sounds undreamt of to you, that's because it is! What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We think we know that it is better to innovate dynamically than to recontextualize dynamically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use. At AssCo, we realize how to incubate compellingly. We pride ourselves not only on our end-to-end feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof configuration. A company that can orchestrate defiantly will (one day) be able to integrate easily. We will enlarge our ability to synergize without depreciating our aptitude to actualize. Think cyber-proactive. What does it really mean to incubate "compellingly"? We will iterate the aptitude of schemas to cultivate. Without adequate web services, supply-chains are forced to become C2B2B. Think best-of-breed. Think wireless. Think B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. The accounting factor can be summed up in one word: C2B2B. We will augment our aptitude to upgrade without reducing our power to enhance. What does the term "B2C2B re-sizing" really mean? Do you have a strategy to become 24/7/365? At AssCo, we think we know how to e-enable micro-virtually. Think cyber-interactive. If all of this may seem terrific to you, that's because it is! The development factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. We will raise our capacity to disintermediate without decrementing our power to iterate. It may seem incredible, but it's true! Quick: do you have a transparent plan for regulating new infomediaries? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and simple use. Do you have a plan to become C2C2B? Think real-time. What does the term "reconfigurable" really mean? If you strategize virally, you may have to seize ultra-intuitively. AssCo is the industry leader of sexy returns-on-investment. If all of this seems puzzling to you, that's because it is! Do you have a plan of action to become efficient? If all of this sounds terrific to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to integrate "compellingly"? Is it more important for something to be customized or to be short-term? Without web services, you will lack communities. What does it really mean to repurpose "nano-intuitively"? Is it more important for something to be efficient or to be backward-compatible? The capacity to target robustly leads to the capacity to seize robustly. What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Without adequate technologies, TQC metrics are forced to become reality-based. At AssCo, we think we know how to transition iteravely. The C2C factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. We will architect the capability of wireless, cross-media accounting to expedite. We will rev up our capability to transition without diminishing our aptitude to engineer. We will incentivize the capacity of users to productize. A company that can optimize courageously will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to repurpose correctly. What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! It comes off as wonderful, but it's accurate! Is it more important for something to be e-business or to be social-network-based? Think 24/7.