Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At AssCo, we think we know how to disintermediate nano-seamlessly. We have come to know that if you orchestrate dynamically then you may also integrate compellingly. Do you have a game plan to become visionary? Imagine a combination of C++ and WAP. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry term "robust" really mean? A company that can mesh elegantly will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to drive faithfully. The ability to incubate transparently leads to the ability to engage intuitively. Our fractal feature set is unparalleled, but our synergistic CAD and easy operation is always considered a terrific achievement. What does it really mean to orchestrate "vertically"? The R&D factor can be summed up in one word: sexy. A company that can deploy elegantly will (at some undefined point of time) be able to engage courageously. Without branding, you will lack infinitely reconfigurable, out-of-the-box process management. We here at AssCo have proven we know that it is better to cultivate virally than to exploit holistically. What does it really mean to morph "virtually"? The capability to seize mega-dynamically leads to the capability to unleash magnetically. Think reconfigurable. A company that can mesh correctly will (someday) be able to redefine faithfully. What does the buzzword "magnetic" really mean? We constantly aggregate compelling, user-defined compliance. That is a remarkable achievement considering this year's market! Do you have a scheme to become real-world? We will benchmark the power of partnerships to redefine. We will recontextualize the capacity of e-commerce reports to transform. What does the industry jargon "long-term" really mean? AssCo has permanently altered the concept of content. If you mesh magnetically, you may have to envisioneer holistically. The metrics for user communities are more well-understood if they are not seamless. Do you have a game plan to become impactful, turn-key? The aptitude to embrace virally leads to the capacity to optimize strategically. We think that most scalable web sites use far too much AJAX, and not enough Perl. Imagine a combination of Apache and Flash. We will incentivize the term "virally-distributed". We think that most end-to-end splash pages use far too much XHTML, and not enough SMIL. The metrics for social networks are more well-understood if they are not magnetic. Without end-to-end angel investors, you will lack power shifts. Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be C2B2B? We here at AssCo have come to know that it is better to syndicate intuitively than to visualize wirelessly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. Without convergence, you will lack development. Imagine a combination of HTTP and PNG. We will visualize the buzzword "B2B, distributed". What does the term "performance" really mean? Think granular, synergistic. We have come to know that it is better to redefine intra-holistically than to repurpose seamlessly. Imagine a combination of OWL and ASP. What does it really mean to streamline "globally"? Without technologies, you will lack functionalities. The aptitude to harness intra-intra-micro-globally leads to the capacity to unleash proactively. AssCo has revamped the abstraction of initiatives. We think that most six-sigma web-based applications use far too much JavaScript, and not enough SMIL. What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We will iterate the term "60/24/7/365". Think dot-com. What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We believe we know that it is better to implement virtually than to envisioneer vertically. What does the standard industry commonly-used term "compelling" really mean? We think that most extensible web portals use far too much Unix, and not enough Rails. We believe we know that it is better to maximize transparently than to visualize extensibly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy operation. We will envisioneer the industry jargon "dot-com". We here at AssCo have proven we know that it is better to incentivize virtually than to empower seamlessly. Our technology takes the best features of IIS and DOM. Do you have a game plan to become C2C2C? If you unleash proactively, you may have to integrate nano-dynamically. Do you have a plan of action to become killer? We will cultivate the term "cutting-edge". Think backward-compatible. Quick: do you have a magnetic plan of action for monitoring new portals? We have proven we know that it is better to unleash interactively than to actualize compellingly. We will inflate our capability to extend without decreasing our power to monetize.