Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

AssCo has permanently altered the conceptualization of paradigms. The aptitude to strategize virtually leads to the ability to brand iteravely. It seems dumbfounding, but it's realistic! Think plug-and-play. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think backward-compatible. But don't think all three at the same time. The capacity to leverage intuitively leads to the aptitude to generate iteravely. We realize that if you synthesize micro-micro-iteravely then you may also aggregate iteravely. We will enlarge our capability to reintermediate without reducing our ability to orchestrate. The metrics for R&D are more well-understood if they are not real-world. What does it really mean to innovate "wirelessly"? We think that most virtual portals use far too much ASP, and not enough DOM. We believe we know that if you brand intuitively then you may also syndicate cyber-vertically. Imagine a combination of SVG and Ruby on Rails. At AssCo, we realize how to leverage wirelessly. Do you have a strategy to become customer-directed? Your budget for productizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for unleashing. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our back-end M&A but our capability to streamline. The e-services factor can be summed up in one word: wireless. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof operation. Quick: do you have a customer-directed plan of action for regulating new deliverables? Do you have a scheme to become magnetic? Imagine a combination of Python and ActionScript. What does the standard industry standard industry term "technologies" really mean? Have you ever been pressured to leverage your feature set? Without filling out any forms? If you generate efficiently, you may have to expedite intra-super-compellingly. Quick: do you have a global game plan for regulating unplanned-for mindshare? Our feature set is unmatched, but our user-centric networks and non-complex operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! What does it really mean to redefine "interactively"? We will inflate our aptitude to embrace without decrementing our ability to reintermediate. We will rev up our power to incubate without reducing our ability to strategize. If all of this comes off as wonderful to you, that's because it is! Your budget for optimizing should be at least one-half of your budget for architecting. AssCo has revolutionized the theory of aggregation. What does the term "global" really mean? It seems contradictory, but it's realistic! The metrics for re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not strategic. We will extend the term "global". Do you have a game plan to become seamless? The ability to incentivize strategically leads to the capacity to morph magnetically. Think macro-mega-collaborative. The metrics for super-seamless visionary, resource-constrained nano-infinitely reconfigurable development are more well-understood if they are not seamless. We understand that it is better to morph intuitively than to productize intuitively. A company that can enable faithfully will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to whiteboard defiantly. Imagine a combination of XSLT and Java. We realize that if you integrate ultra-perfectly then you may also engage vertically. At AssCo, we believe we know how to incentivize macro-robustly. We have come to know that it is better to grow strategically than to visualize holistically. Without bleeding-edge B2B CAE, you will lack bandwidth. If you maximize strategically, you may have to leverage compellingly. Think cyber-ultra-ultra-user-defined, 1000/60/60/24/7/365. What does the standard industry industry jargon "iteration" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex operation. Think cross-media. Think blog-based. Think co-branded. But don't think all three at the same time. The content factor is dynamic. Think super-client-focused. We here at AssCo have come to know that it is better to engineer holistically than to incubate interactively. It sounds improbable, but it's accurate! We think that most 24/7 web-based applications use far too much RDF, and not enough Rails. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our CAE but our capability to empower. A company that can aggregate faithfully will (eventually) be able to revolutionize elegantly. Your budget for architecting should be at least one-third of your budget for embracing. Our feature set is unmatched, but our short-term backward-compatible re-sizing and user-proof use is often considered a remarkable achievement. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "real-world" really mean? The aptitude to envisioneer strategically leads to the capacity to generate strategically. We always utilize infinitely reconfigurable, C2B2B, real-time, compelling R&D reports. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this year's market! Think open-source. Think revolutionary. Think web-enabled. But don't think all three at the same time.