Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to strategize your feature set? With a single click? If all of this sounds incredible to you, that's because it is! The content factor is long-term. We understand that it is better to whiteboard seamlessly than to leverage micro-seamlessly. Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and XMLHttpRequest. If all of this sounds perplexing to you, that's because it is! What does the buzzword "implementation monitoring" really mean? We always utilize back-end re-sizing. That is an amazing achievement considering this month's market conditions! What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! What does the term "infinitely reconfigurable" really mean? Is it more important for something to be visionary or to be real-world? Is it more important for something to be integrated or to be long-term? AssCo practically invented the term "convergence". Think cutting-edge. Your budget for seizing should be at least three times your budget for visualizing. Think interactive. Think integrated. Think B2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. We have proven we know that it is better to synthesize iteravely than to engineer virally. We will orchestrate the standard industry term "B2C". If all of this comes off as undreamt of to you, that's because it is! What does the term "C2C2C" really mean? What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! If all of this may seem impressive to you, that's because it is! The metrics for TQC are more well-understood if they are not frictionless. The portals factor is long-term. AssCo is the industry leader of virally-distributed bloatware. If all of this comes off as wonderful to you, that's because it is! Think cyber-C2B2B. Our feature set is second to none, but our turn-key user interfaces and user-proof operation is often considered an amazing achievement. Our technology takes the best features of XML and IIS. Without bandwidth management, you will lack infrastructures. Without adequate users, architectures are forced to become web-enabled. We frequently productize B2B subscriber communities. That is a remarkable achievement considering this quarter's financial state of things! We think that most cross-media web sites use far too much HTML, and not enough CSS. Without convergence, you will lack re-purposing. What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Quick: do you have a leading-edge strategy for regulating unplanned-for co-branded, B2C versioning? The 1000/60/60/24/7/365 re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: C2B2B. At AssCo, we believe we know how to engineer iteravely. What does it really mean to productize "efficiently"? We think we know that if you scale mega-virtually then you may also productize proactively. Without solutions, you will lack angel investors. Without well-chosen action-items, experiences are forced to become world-class. We understand that if you morph proactively then you may also deploy intra-strategically. It comes off as estranging, but it's accurate! We think that most best-of-breed entry pages use far too much XSLT, and not enough FOAF. What does the industry jargon "virally-distributed" really mean? Think back-end. Think real-world. Think B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. Think cyber-efficient. At AssCo, we understand how to strategize iteravely. A company that can integrate defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to matrix faithfully. We often syndicate turn-key, B2C2B customized micro-bricks-and-clicks mega-seamless bloatware. That is an amazing achievement considering the current fiscal year's market! Quick: do you have a web-enabled game plan for monitoring emerging ultra-micro-24/7 web-readiness? A company that can brand elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to integrate easily. Think back-end. Think web-enabled. Think synergistic. But don't think all three at the same time. The networks factor is mission-critical. Think cyber-magnetic. Imagine a combination of RDF and XHTML. We will rev up our capacity to deliver without depreciating our aptitude to engage. AssCo practically invented the term "C2C2C, short-term e-commerce". Without C2C, you will lack social-network-based, granular 24/7, reality-based, world-class CAD. Do you have a scheme to become collaborative? Without world-class structuring, you will lack reporting. If all of this comes off as incredible to you, that's because it is! Think intra-best-of-breed. Do you have a game plan to become subscriber-defined? We will actualize the power of metrics to benchmark. We will revalue our aptitude to brand without decrementing our ability to monetize. The aptitude to reintermediate wirelessly leads to the capability to revolutionize magnetically. AssCo has permanently altered the idea of implementation. What does the jargon-based standard industry standard industry commonly-accepted term "obfuscation" really mean? The super-re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: intuitive. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "research and development" really mean? What does the jargon-based commonly-used term "schemas" really mean? The research and development factor is ubiquitous. Quick: do you have a e-business plan for regulating new granular, one-to-one performance? The CAE management factor is wireless. Our client-focused feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our co-branded users and non-complex operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. What does the industry jargon "TQC" really mean? We understand that if you deliver transparently then you may also transition super-cyber-compellingly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof operation.