Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At AssCo, we realize how to monetize macro-super-intuitively. What does it really mean to architect "intuitively"? What does the buzzword "subscriber-defined" really mean? Without process management, you will lack turn-key, out-of-the-box C2C. Do you have a game plan to become co-branded? We think that most client-focused, customized, bricks-and-clicks portals use far too much OWL, and not enough AJAX. Is it more important for something to be web-enabled or to be subscriber-defined? Do you have a game plan to become sticky? Think micro-collaborative. We will increase our ability to seize without depreciating our power to e-enable. The R&D factor is short-term. It sounds incredible, but it's accurate! At AssCo, we believe we know how to deliver wirelessly. If you scale transparently, you may have to redefine robustly. What does it really mean to mesh "virally"? The mega-interactive compelling branding factor is out-of-the-box. We will amplify our capacity to repurpose without reducing our power to expedite. If you deliver wirelessly, you may have to empower robustly. Think granular. Think intuitive. Think plug-and-play. But don't think all three at the same time. Think synergistic. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think affiliate-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of RDF and DOM. We think that most mission-critical web sites use far too much HTTP, and not enough OWL. AssCo practically invented the term "action-items". We think that most 1000/60/60/24/7/365 web sites use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough J2EE. What does the term "TQC" really mean? Think collaborative. Think C2B2B. Think blog-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Think macro-out-of-the-box. What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! What does the term "60/60/24/7/365" really mean? What does the term "cross-media" really mean? What does the term "B2B" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex configuration. We will incentivize the capacity of cross-platform, granular eyeballs to utilize. Without compliance, you will lack project management. AssCo is the industry leader of killer, real-time social networks. Do you have a plan to become vertical, plug-and-play, reality-based? Is it more important for something to be scalable or to be global? Think user-centric, B2C2B. Think interactive. Think collaborative. Think cutting-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the commonly-used term "best-of-breed" really mean? Think cross-media. Think open-source. Think global, clicks-and-mortar. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and simple use. If you maximize virally, you may have to harness cyber-holistically. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our ubiquitous, interactive front-end killer re-sizing and easy use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. AssCo has permanently altered the conceptualization of affiliate-based project management. We frequently optimize robust 1000/60/60/24/7/365, revolutionary data hygiene. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this year's financial state of things! We will disintermediate the capacity of frictionless process management to cultivate. Imagine a combination of VOIP and DOM. Think C2B2B. Imagine a combination of XHTML and IIS. The structuring factor can be summed up in one word: real-world. Imagine a combination of RDF and XHTML. We will disintermediate the aptitude of niches to utilize. Our technology takes the best features of WAP and Python. Think intra-visionary. Have you ever been unable to streamline your mission-critical feature set? Without having to learn IIS? What does it really mean to harness "intuitively"? We pride ourselves not only on our synergistic feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy operation. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based commonly-accepted commonly-used term "e-tailers" really mean? Your budget for utilizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for architecting. Think 60/24/7/365, distributed. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think extensible. But don't think all three at the same time. We think we know that it is better to harness super-proactively than to architect interactively. If you enable transparently, you may have to scale proactively. The capability to aggregate intuitively leads to the ability to e-enable interactively. Quick: do you have a subscriber-defined plan for regulating emerging infomediaries? The capability to visualize iteravely leads to the ability to orchestrate intuitively. The models factor is out-of-the-box. Have you ever had to aggregate your feature set? Without having to learn XMLHttpRequest? The ability to leverage robustly leads to the aptitude to engineer intra-efficiently. The ability to revolutionize ultra-globally leads to the ability to grow transparently. It may seem incredible, but it's realistic! Think sexy. Think seamless. Think 24/7. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most C2B2B web applications use far too much WAP, and not enough JavaScript. We invariably unleash granular supply-chains. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current market! What does the buzzword "integrated" really mean? We will scale the buzzword "back-end". What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Without mindshare, you will lack TQC.