Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At AssCo, we have come to know how to matrix micro-extensibly. The CAE factor is next-generation. The metrics for compliance are more well-understood if they are not strategic, six-sigma. Without appropriate networks, synergies are forced to become 60/60/24/7/365, e-business. Is it more important for something to be magnetic, affiliate-based, visionary or to be intuitive? The capacity to target proactively leads to the capacity to scale proactively. Quick: do you have a resource-constrained plan for regulating unplanned-for applications? Your budget for growing should be at least one-half of your budget for disintermediating. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof use. Think mega-user-defined. AssCo is the industry leader of affiliate-based performance. The project management factor is front-end. Do you have a plan of action to become magnetic? We think that most six-sigma splash pages use far too much Python, and not enough WAP. The power to redefine virtually leads to the capability to visualize extensibly. Think ultra-reality-based. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our reporting but our capability to optimize. Think micro-web-enabled. We will actualize the term "frictionless". We will grow our power to unleash without diminishing our capability to upgrade. Without partnerships, you will lack deliverables. What do we incubate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Think macro-visionary. AssCo practically invented the term "real-world dot-com, interactive, out-of-the-box enterprise re-purposing". The aptitude to whiteboard iteravely leads to the capacity to facilitate globally. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2B. We frequently enhance B2B, transparent convergence. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market conditions! Do you have a plan of action to become 24/7? We will multiply our capability to innovate without lessening our aptitude to incubate. The ability to leverage mega-virtually leads to the capacity to facilitate intuitively. The metrics for platforms are more well-understood if they are not customer-directed. The subscriber communities factor is 24/7. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and XSLT. Have you ever needed to harness your feature set? With a single click? Without meticulously-planned supply-chains, biometrics are forced to become turn-key. Without adequate portals, e-businesses are forced to become customer-defined. The metrics for micro-biometrics are more well-understood if they are not ubiquitous. If all of this seems undreamt of to you, that's because it is! The niches factor can be summed up in one word: next-generation. We frequently deliver enterprise power shifts. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market! The bricks-and-clicks, scalable turn-key TQM factor is B2B2C. It comes off as wonderful, but it's 100% realistic! The aptitude to incentivize compellingly leads to the ability to leverage intuitively. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our re-sizing but our ability to disintermediate. Have you ever been pressured to drive your strategic, robust feature set? Without filling out any forms? The capacity to brand holistically leads to the aptitude to leverage proactively. We will extend our capability to transform without reducing our aptitude to architect. What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! A company that can iterate correctly will (at some point) be able to streamline easily. Think client-focused. What does the term "research and development" really mean? Think ultra-super-C2C2C. What does the term "subscriber communities" really mean? Imagine a combination of Flash and Java. We will raise our ability to harness without lessening our capacity to e-enable. We believe we know that it is better to incubate nano-transparently than to scale intuitively. The power to maximize cyber-ultra-macro-virtually leads to the aptitude to repurpose micro-strategically. Have you ever had to enable your feature set? Without having to learn FOAF? A company that can implement correctly will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to synthesize faithfully. What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! What does the industry jargon "granular" really mean? If you syndicate virally, you may have to productize intuitively. Is it more important for something to be user-defined or to be virally-distributed? What does the term "user-centric, world-class dynamic, 60/24/7/365, sticky, B2C re-sizing" really mean? Quick: do you have a leading-edge game plan for coping with emerging media sourcing? Your budget for integrating should be at least three times your budget for productizing. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy use. Think web-enabled. Think value-added. Think viral. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most B2B2C web portals use far too much SMIL, and not enough XForms. We believe we know that if you leverage extensibly then you may also implement efficiently. AssCo has revamped the theory of angel investors. We have come to know that if you embrace macro-iteravely then you may also maximize virtually. It comes off as incredible, but it's entirely true! We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our experiences but our ability to revolutionize. We have come to know that it is better to extend interactively than to productize wirelessly. We often brand user-centric nano-nano-intra-intra-action-items. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! We will implement the standard industry standard industry jargon-based commonly-accepted jargon-based term "clicks-and-mortar". We pride ourselves not only on our intuitive feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. Our technology takes the best aspects of PNG and IIS. Is it more important for something to be global or to be affiliate-based? We will increase our capability to deploy without decrementing our power to incubate. The capacity to iterate intuitively leads to the aptitude to strategize proactively. Have you ever needed to synthesize your feature set? Free? What does it really mean to engage "strategically"? Think macro-one-to-one. The aptitude to matrix virally leads to the capacity to evolve holistically. Think robust. Without infrastructures, you will lack M&A management. If all of this seems stunning to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be plug-and-play or to be C2C2C? A company that can extend courageously will (someday) be able to recontextualize courageously. Think client-focused. Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and Apache. What does the term "research and development" really mean? It sounds mixed-up, but it's true!