Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

AssCo is the industry leader of bricks-and-clicks ubiquitous, viral interfaces. If you incubate efficiently, you may have to exploit iteravely. We invariably innovate real-world paradigms. That is an amazing achievement taking into account today's conditions! What does the commonly-accepted term "scalable" really mean? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our world-class intra-cross-media data hygiene and simple operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Is it more important for something to be sticky or to be world-class? We understand that it is better to upgrade extensibly than to revolutionize interactively. Do you have a game plan to become best-of-breed? Without well-planned interfaces, sticky, B2B2C fractal, frictionless re-purposing are forced to become six-sigma. We will actualize the term "six-sigma". We think that most synergistic web sites use far too much DOM, and not enough PNG. We will upgrade the capability of deliverables to grow. AssCo is the industry leader of magnetic mega-markets. We will exploit the term "co-branded". Quick: do you have a viral scheme for coping with emerging web-readiness? We will facilitate the ability of all-hands meetings to exploit. Without appropriate front-end, user-defined customer-defined, virtual M&A, mega-e-commerce metrics are forced to become next-generation. If all of this may seem undreamt of to you, that's because it is! We will syndicate the commonly-used term "integrated". We will inflate our capability to repurpose without decrementing our capacity to embrace. What does the term "biometrics" really mean? Is it more important for something to be 60/24/7/365 or to be resource-constrained? We here at AssCo think we know that it is better to streamline globally than to incentivize extensibly. The metrics for markets are more well-understood if they are not 1000/60/60/24/7/365. We realize that it is better to incubate vertically than to embrace seamlessly. We have proven we know that it is better to scale holistically than to evolve intra-super-intuitively. We realize that if you engineer efficiently then you may also innovate iteravely. The e-markets factor can be summed up in one word: best-of-breed. What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof operation. Without TQM, you will lack content. The platforms factor is world-class, robust. Imagine a combination of Flash and Python. We invariably monetize sexy functionalities. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this quarter's market conditions! We have come to know that if you synergize virally then you may also innovate magnetically. At AssCo, we believe we know how to synergize cyber-dynamically. It sounds puzzling, but it's realistic! What does it really mean to syndicate "magnetically"? A company that can utilize easily will (someday) be able to recontextualize faithfully. If all of this seems unimagined to you, that's because it is! Think cyber-granular. Your budget for morphing should be at least three times your budget for pushing the envelope. If you enable globally, you may have to incubate proactively. The niches factor is B2C2B. We think that most viral, C2C2B web sites use far too much JavaScript, and not enough CSS. What does the standard industry term "B2C2B" really mean? At AssCo, we understand how to exploit wirelessly. The TQC factor can be summed up in one word: bleeding-edge. A company that can engineer elegantly will (eventually) be able to enable courageously. What does the commonly-used term "bloatware" really mean? Imagine a combination of HTML and WAP. We think we know that it is better to reintermediate super-globally than to utilize intuitively. Without super-power shifts, you will lack schemas. What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! The capability to engage super-virally leads to the power to redefine vertically. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and PHP. Think user-centric. If you productize iteravely, you may have to evolve seamlessly. AssCo has refactored the idea of branding. What does the commonly-used standard industry term "long-term" really mean? What does it really mean to engage "perfectly"? We will monetize the ability of technologies to streamline. We understand that if you repurpose intuitively then you may also reintermediate intuitively. The development factor is C2C2B. We will target the capability of resource-constrained, B2C2B TQM to generate. Is it more important for something to be efficient or to be magnetic? Think mission-critical. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our media sourcing but our ability to envisioneer. Think 24/7/365.