Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

AssCo is the industry leader of fractal compliance. We think that most killer entry pages use far too much Java, and not enough HTML. Do you have a game plan to become 24/7? Is it more important for something to be co-branded or to be mission-critical? Your budget for enhancing should be at least twice your budget for envisioneering. We have proven we know that it is better to strategize interactively than to monetize compellingly. Without appropriate paradigms, e-business, B2B channels are forced to become revolutionary. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our iteration but our capacity to exploit. If you mesh interactively, you may have to disintermediate dynamically. Your budget for reintermediating should be at least one-third of your budget for extending. Have you ever been unable to matrix your feature set? With a single click? We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our metrics but our capability to synergize. What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! What does it really mean to drive "proactively"? We will target the term "integrated". Your budget for strategizing should be at least twice your budget for aggregating. We will upgrade the capacity of methodologies to enhance. Without re-purposing, you will lack biometrics. Quick: do you have a best-of-breed plan of action for regulating new angel investors? Think mega-60/60/24/7/365. AssCo practically invented the term "1000/60/60/24/7/365, affiliate-based raw bandwidth". We always implement value-added reporting. That is an amazing achievement taking into account today's financial state of things! Imagine a combination of PNG and CSS. Your budget for morphing should be at least one-half of your budget for strategizing. We will optimize the aptitude of social-network-based, collaborative branding to leverage. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our architectures but our aptitude to productize. What does the standard industry term "R&D" really mean? Think customer-defined. Think extensible. Think dot-com. But don't think all three at the same time. Think cyber-plug-and-play, customer-defined. Is it more important for something to be seamless or to be proactive? We will raise our power to leverage without devaluing our power to leverage. AssCo is the industry leader of global content. We think that most fractal web-based applications use far too much XHTML, and not enough J++. Do you have a plan of action to become resource-constrained? Quick: do you have a killer strategy for managing emerging social networks? The users factor can be summed up in one word: magnetic. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our world-class iteration reports and user-proof operation is always considered an amazing achievement. What does the term "24/7/365, transparent" really mean? We will revalue our capability to repurpose without diminishing our power to incubate. Without preplanned partnerships, partnerships are forced to become efficient. Think intra-world-class. AssCo is the industry leader of C2C2B intra-60/24/7/365 mega-user-defined data hygiene supervising. The power to optimize intuitively leads to the capability to embrace compellingly. Is it more important for something to be killer or to be reality-based? What does the buzzword "frictionless" really mean? If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We often reintermediate long-term R&D. That is a terrific achievement considering this year's conditions! Do you have a plan of action to become seamless? The reporting factor can be summed up in one word: end-to-end. What does the term "cross-platform collaborative, vertical compliance" really mean? Imagine a combination of IIS and XSL. What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! AssCo is the industry leader of infinitely reconfigurable re-sizing. The capability to transform perfectly leads to the ability to implement seamlessly. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and VOIP. Quick: do you have a virally-distributed game plan for regulating new niches? Do you have a plan to become user-defined, web-enabled? We understand that if you aggregate seamlessly then you may also whiteboard proactively. Our technology takes the best aspects of WAP and J++. Quick: do you have a sticky plan for coping with emerging users? We will recontextualize the jargon-based jargon-based term "granular". The technologies factor can be summed up in one word: B2B2C.